My Life, Deleted: A Memoir

by Scott Bolzan, Joan Bolzan, Caitlin Rother

My Life, Deleted —part love story, part medical mystery, and part inspirational memoir—is the true story of Scott Bolzan, the 46-year-old former pro football offensive lineman for the Cleveland Browns who suffered permanent amnesia after a tragic accident. Co-written with his wife Joan Bolzan, this riveting account details Scott's courageous fight to build a new life after losing all memories of his past, his wife and children, his likes and dislikes, and even how to navigate the fast pace and technology of the 21st century. Readers of In an Instant by Bob and Lee Woodruff, Jill Bolte Taylor's My Stroke of Insight , and Richard M. Cohen's Blindsided will be profoundly moved by My Life, Deleted , a remarkable story of tragedy, hope, love, and perseverance.

Genres: Nonfiction, Memoir, Biography, Biography Memoir, Mental Health, Medical, Psychology

304 pages, Hardcover

First published October 4, 2011

About the author

Scott Bolzan, born in Chicago, Illinois, is a former professional football player, pilot, and successful businessman. Drafted by the NFL’s New England Patriots, he played several seasons at offensive guard for the Cleveland Browns and with the USFL, Memphis Showboats. He is currently the Founder and CEO of Legendary Jets in Tempe, Arizona, and has been married to his college sweetheart for 25 years. He has two children and resides in Gilbert, Arizona.

College:
Scott graduated from Thornwood High School in South Holland, Illinois, in 1980. Choosing to remain in Illinois for college, he was a four year starter as a 6’4” 270 lb offensive tackle for Northern Illinois University. As a captain his senior year, he lead the NIU Huskies to the university’s first and only regular season MAC Conference title and their first Division 1-A bowl game with a victory in the 1983 California Bowl. Scott earned NIU’s most valuable lineman award and was recognized First Team All Mid-America Conference Offensive Lineman and All American (Honorable Mention). He was inducted as a member of the NIU Hall of Fame in 1995.

Professional Career:
Passion for aviation began as a hobby as a pilot. Scott soon realized his love for the aviation business and an escalating need for his flight services. He grew a successful and trusted charter business in North Scottsdale and soon began flying surgical transplant teams throughout Arizona as well as national charter trips. Scott’s company was honored to bring first heart for transplant into the state of Arizona for Mayo Hospital. In record time, the charter company went from unranked in 2004, to ranked number two in 2005 then the number-one ranked charter company by Arizona Business Magazine in 2006. Understanding the changes in the industry and desire to return to a “relationship” based company, Scott reorganized this company and became the Founder and CEO of Legendary Jets in Tempe, Arizona, specializing in professional business aircraft management and ownership. Scott also is involved in the NFL Alumni Association serving on the Board of Directors as the Membership Director of the Arizona Chapter. Scott Also serves on the Board of Directors of the Brain Injury Association of Arizona.

Battle with a Brain Injury:
In December of 2008, Scott suffered a traumatic brain injury that has erased the previous 46 years of his life due to profound retrograde amnesia caused by his accident. Scott has spent his time trying to rebuild his previous experiences and lessons of his previous life. Through this traumatic event Scott has learned to persevere through his adversities and remain hopeful and optimistic that he will reinvent himself to become a better man than before. Scott’s book, coauthored with his wife Joan and Caitlin Rother, is titled My Life, Deleted: A Memoir of Starting Over.

Reviews

[Tracie Schwertley · Rating 2 out of 5]

Meh.

This memoir was horribly written, but I'd be willing to overlook that if the story was compelling. It's hard to feel sorry for somebody complaining that they are worried about mounting bills, upset because their health insurance might lapse and they won't be able to pay for a $870 test, yet in the next breath wonder if they should take the BMW or the Porsche to visit their $325,000 yacht. Meanwhile, the sixteen year old daughter drives a Tahoe and two other cars sit idle in the garage.

In one paragraph the wife is lamenting that she doesn't know how she'll pay for everything, and in the very next paragraph a trip to Hawaii is in the works.

Maybe it's the English major in me, but when there is such obvious foreshadowing multiple times, and then nothing becomes of it, it's downright irritating. WHAT was the "suspicious, oily substance that you slipped on, especially made a point of noting before blacking out, and then struggled to mime to the nurses the minute you woke up, Scott?" WHAT? WHAT? I MUST KNOW!!!!

[Daniel · Rating 2 out of 5]

It's an interesting story, and I am sure they are lovely people, but I just didn't 'feel' them. I know it probably has more to do with me than them, but when they were planning vacations to Hawaii and Paris and wondering how they were going to pay their bills, well, I disconnected. As annoying as this is, I think that if they didn't have the financial resources that they had I would've cared more about them.
The amnesia aspect is interesting, and a little scary, but even that was a little flat. We were being told how they felt when this or that happened, but I didn't 'feel' it, I was only reading it, and that isn't great.

[Marie · Rating 4 out of 5]

It is harder to think of a more intriguing memoir than one that is written by someone who has completely lost all their memory from a seemingly less than traumatic head injury from a fall in a bathroom. Add in that he was an ex-NFL football player, successful business man and committed family man, and you have the makings of a dramatic story or so you would think. Unfortunately the book was overly detailed, plodded and dragged at times and was just not well written. But overlooking it's faults, I really was mesmerized by Scott Bolzan's story. It really caused me to stop and think about my own life, if I was in a similar situation. What would I think about family members if we had no history together? Would I make the same choices of how I spend my time, energy or money? How would others explain who I was or what I did? The author's story is still unfolding, but I'm grateful he paused to write this memoir that gave me so much to ponder.

[Jennifer · Rating 1 out of 5]

I made it 75% through before quitting. This guy is an asshole. How anyone could find him inspirational is beyond me. He's filled with anger issues and petty masculinity issues, and it's clear from his book that this did not start with his accident. Everything he says and does is filtered through a lens of "Be a MAN." He has a felony charge that could have been avoided in he had confided in his wife, but instead he decided to hide his plan from her. Because, you know, women can't handle stress (it's not like many of us go around birthing children or leaking blood from our bodies on a monthly basis, no sir).

That's not enough for me to rate the book so poorly. It's also poorly written. The writing is bland and uninspired. Simply put, it's boring.

At one point Scott talks about how he's okay with gay marriage, but having to look at two men kissing makes him uncomfortable (sigh). He specifically states this about men, not women, presumably due to his masculinity issues (and he's probably wanked it to lesbian porn). This information was completely irrelevant. It was smooshed in between two paragraph - the previous paragraph is about googling financial terms; the latter is about seeing a neurologist. See what I mean? Terrible, disjointed writing.

I also found it hard to relate to this family. At one point Scott complains that his son is disrespecting him...because s son's ears are pierced with gauges. Scott thinks it's wrong to modify your body since he and his wife brought him into this world in one piece. Scott doesn't remark on whether his daughter or wife has pierced ears, but presumably that would be okay, because they're women. Even so, how much of an asshole do you have to be to decree that what someone does with THEIR body is disrespectful towards YOU? Oh, and Scott has a tattoo.

Speaking of tattoos, Scott tells his son, Grant, that he wish Grant didn't have a tattoo of his dead sister's name near his heart, because he doesn't believe Grant could possibly care, since he hadn't even been born yet. ASSHOLE. Even worse, Scott says that Taylor, his daughter, also has a tattoo of the dead sister's name, but he's okay with that because he thinks Taylor is more spiritual. That is when I gave up reading.

I mean, Scott talks about crying when he finds out about his stillborn daughter. But if Grant couldn't possibly care because he wasn't born yet, then how can Scott care? He doesn't even remember her. But does Scott ever ponder this or reflect on his hypocrisy? Nope!

Scott is constantly furious with Grant because Grant is a drug addict, and although I understand this, I also wonder what it was like for Grant, having to grow up with Scott as a father. I would have done drugs, too. Scott sounds horrible. Just awful, possibly even emotionally abusive.

Then there was the money. Scott's wife doesn't work (of course) and the medical bills are piling up. They have four cars. And a yacht. And they are reluctant to sell any of it. Oh, they finally do, but reading about this privileged, rich family and how they didn't want to sell the car that they only used to drive to their yacht in California was maddening. Get some goddamn perspective.

[Carmen · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a memoir written by a man who has retrograde amnesia. He sustained a head injury after slipping and falling in the bathroom at work. He wakes up with no idea of who he is, who his family is, and lacks basic knowledge of the world. Fascinating. He has to relearn everything (not speech or how to walk). He is turned into 'a 46-year-old virgin' because he doesn't even remember what sex is, much less having it. He has to relearn what Christmas is. He has no idea that he used to play football and fly planes. He doesn't remember how to be a parent (or his own parents!). He learns that his wife had a miscarriage early in their marriage and it obviously causes them both tons of pain that all those memories are no longer shared – they are lost to him forever. It is so crazy, it is hard to believe that it's true. Not only does he have to deal with his amnesia, but with a son (about 20?) who is a serious drug addict. His wife, Joan, is saint-like in her loyalty, support and determination to make him a fully functional human again. He really loves his wife and daughter and that comes through very strongly and is very refreshing. One thing I did NOT like about the book is how he is constantly complaining about his family being in dire financial straights even though he has a huge house, a yacht, and 6 or so cars that are all BMW, etc.

[John · Rating 4 out of 5]

Some reviewers have complained about the many details of Scott's day-to-day existence ("I met Jim for lunch at Smith's Cafe, where he had a fish taco with a Dr. Pepper and I had a stromboli and Coke, even though I had no real idea what a stromboli was ..."), but I thought that added to the experience of recent details filling the 47-year void. He knew so little about anything, that at first I was surprised he could even communicate at all. His wife's asking him to pick up a bag of potato chips at the supermarket, while she got other things, was a real challenge as he had no idea of the differences among the choices.
His main job coming home is to learn to care about his family, for whom he has no feelings, as they are strangers to him. That part goes well (at least initially), although he confesses he had to fake his feelings, to avoid devastating them, until he realized that although he didn't know anything about their history, he could see that they were decent people. Lots of medical testing and following indicate that he's not likely to regain his memory, so he goes about building a "new" life, as an advocate for those with brain injury. Slight spoiler: the book ends on an upbeat note, in spite of the medical and personal setbacks Scott encounters.
Money problems play a role in the drama. Scott finds several very expensive watches, wondering why he ever bought them, as he doesn't need more than one or two; his wife likewise has many expensive purchases. If not beyond their means, they were solely testing things, which I found a bit difficult to just shrug off as they'd had to declare bankruptcy previously (details of which would be a spoiler). Another area, where I couldn't identify with Scott, or more specifically his wife, had to do with a daughter who was referred to as "stillborn", yet was both christened and baptized? Joan seems unwilling to have let the situation go, choosing to dwell on it decades later in a manner that struck me as morbid.
Recommended for conveying Scott's fear and frustration in having to face a life of complete, total "unknown" - no past, no idea of what a future might mean, and a present without context.

[Christa · Rating 3 out of 5]

The biography of a former NFL player who hit his head when he fell at work and had complete retrograde amnesia. He remembered nothing after his accident - his wife, kids, parents, growing up, or even what things were like phones TVs and cars. It’s a fascinating story. He captures how scary it must be to rely on strangers for everything.

The writing style is very basic and repetitive. It was also hard to read about financial struggles when they still have fancy cars and a yacht. TBH, I skipped several chapters because of how repetitive it was.


All in all, a good yet tragic story hindered by the writing style. I could see where he would be a good motivational speaker.

[Courtney Rodgers · Rating 2 out of 5]

Terrible writing. Scot is an unreliable narrator- which would make sense if he had been the only author. The picture painted of Scot is angry, holier than thou, and irresponsible. I couldn’t sympathize with his family’s so called money problems with paying the bills when in the next sentence his family was jetting off to Hawaii. The focus of the book is less on scot’s amnesia and recovery than it is about his familial relationships, which are frankly boring to anyone else.

[Fara · Rating 3 out of 5]

Tak pernah terfikir bagaimana thought process seorang pesakit amnesia. Bukan setakat identiti diri tapi Scott tak mengingati apa-apa yang berlaku sepanjang 46 tahun usianya. Beliau terpaksa belajar semula bermacam perkara (kebanyakan melalui tv dan internet) dan menyesuaikan diri hidup bersama orang yang tak dikenali (semua orang termasuk isteri dan anak-anaknya).

Tak banyak cerita dari sudut medik, lebih kepada catatan harian penulis tapi buku ini tetap menarik untuk dibaca.

[Sassafrass · Rating 2 out of 5]

The reason why this book didn't resonate with me was because I didn't really feel any empathy for this man. I don't know what it was but he just didn't appeal to me or make care about him. Because of this I think I criticized every word of what was written in this book. I thought the idea of the story appealed to me, but not the subject of the story.

[Cymiki · Rating 4 out of 5]

It seems impossible to imagine that one's memories, such an integral part of who we are, could be deleted. How Scott and his wife battled thru medical tests, everyday life and family dynamics presents an intriguing story.

[Ginnytrainor · Rating 1 out of 5]

He may have lost his memory, but his ego is intact. I wanted to like this book (fellow south side chicagoan), but he makes it really difficult to feel any empathy or sympathy for him. Not worth the $2.99 it cost to download!

[Leah · Rating 4 out of 5]

Interesting and an inspirational story. Can't even imagine all they have gone through

[Nore · Rating 2 out of 5]

A literal two stars: It was okay. Interesting to watch the development of toxic masculinity in real time through the lens of an adult man who has been wiped clean by a very unfortunate and goofy accident (although there is some question as to whether Bolzan actually lost his memory, as biographical amnesia like this is... not really a thing); despite that, he portrays himself as a good-hearted guy, and he comes across enough like some of the men in my family that I found a bit of a soft spot for the guy.

My god, though! "Oh, our finances are soooo bad because I can't work. It's so stressful it contributed to me having seizures. I know - let's go to Paris for our anniversary!"

[Kayce · Rating 4 out of 5]

On a recent flight to Florida, I opened my guilty pleasure for my in-flight entertainment. Yep, I was ready to go armed with the latest edition of People magazine. One of my favorite sections of People has always been the Book Reviews and that is where I discovered My Life, Deleted. Once on the ground, it wasn’t long before I made my way to the nearest bookstore to purchase my copy because I was too impatient to wait until I got home to get to the library and I figured I’d have that in-flight time on my return trip to relish this story that fascinated me for some reason.

Can you EVEN imagine? To lose ALL of your memories– both happy and sad, painful and exhilirating, times of growth and times of weeping. To forget what you do for a living, what you’ve done in the past, who your family is and how you fell in love to begin with, where you live, historical events, your role as a human. That’s where Bolzan finds himself after a mere accident of slipping, falling, and suffering a severe brain injury. What is most endearing (in my humble opinion) in this story is Bolzan’s DRIVE, his desire to remember himself, to relearn what he knew and to make a comeback, if you will. In a situation where it could be so easy to become bitter and suffer through your pain, both physical and emotional, Bolzan has a will to not only survive, but to thrive.

Once a successful business owner, Bolzan was enjoying a luxurious lifestyle prior to the accident. It’s refreshing to read of his selling big-ticket items, such as numerous watches that earned the family over $20,000 to apply toward medical bills. Frugal at my core, I rolled my eyes at some of the name dropping such as labels, brands of cars, and other expensive frocks the family had. I kept looking for the epiphany where Bolzan would mention how his brain injury made him realize the important things in life rather than the collection of material goods. While glimpses of that realization were apparent in the story, it seemed more out of necessity rather than a change of heart.

Then can you even imagine on the OTHER side of the story? Joan, Taylor and Grant. Wife, daughter and son, respectively. Joan is an amazing woman who stood by her husband, familiarized herself with his situation and medicines, and talk about the patience of a saint! What an incredible load she carried as the matriarch of her family during this world-flipped-upside-down season. Thank goodness she had the support of a loving, courageous and faithful daughter, Taylor, who baked Christmas cookies with her dad and taught him all over again how to share in one of their holiday traditions.

A heartbreaking twist in this story is the drug addiction their son Grant battles, before and through his dad’s recovery. How frustrating for the family! Grant exhausts his resources: financially, emotionally, physically, while he seeks out his next high and drains his parents’ strength one by one. Understandably, Bolzan is beyond frustrated because not only is he fighting his own battle, he doesn’t remember the stress of Grant’s addiction and can’t share in Joan’s pain, and now he is dealing with it firsthand. And Joan…words can’t even express how phenomenal she is to stand by her husband, support her son, and stick with her family.

My favorite part is when Joan and Scott take Taylor to college to begin pursuing her dream. I won’t even dive into the details but let’s just say this is a heartwarming scene that would be impossible to read without a smile on one’s face and maybe a tear falling down your cheek. This family is an incredible example of unconditional love and one who believes their marriage vows through thick and thin, for better or for worse.

Thanks to Scott for opening up and sharing his story. And you know what? I don’t feel guilty anymore for buying this book rather than waiting patiently for the library. Why not? Because at the end of the book it says “A portion of the authors’ earned royalties from sales of this book will be donated to the Brain Injury Association of Arizona and the Phoenix Children’s Hospital: Neuro-NICU Department.” And what good are these life experiences if they can’t be used together for good and to benefit others?

http://bookwormz2010.wordpress.com/20...

[Megan · Rating 2 out of 5]

Oh, dear. I'm not going to fault the Bolzans for being wealthy, though this book could have been slightly more sensitive to its likely mostly less wealthy readers. They've obviously had hardship come knocking, not as much of the financial kind, but there are other traumas life can throw at people. Not only does Scott lose all long-term memory, he doesn't even have a cool story as too how. The poor man slipped in a bathroom! Can you imagine losing your very self from falling in the bathroom? Moreover, Scott seems like a nice guy, with his support of his wife's ideas and feelings, his desire to help others, and his efforts to try being useful despite his painful headaches and lack of information. But I just couldn't really like this book. First off, he seemed to want to place his identity in context with his gender a little too strongly. He always mentioned needing to figure out who he was "as a man". Oh, please. It drove me a little bonkers. Maybe focus a little more on personhood than manhood if you want readers to go along with you. And taking the reader along is really the problem with this book; they don't do it. First, the timeline management is poor, and I often got a bit confused about how much time had really passed. Days or months? And the emotional presentation was just very shallow. The emotions themselves were probably deep and vivid in their real life moments. Too bad that in the book they are not fully explored. The vocabulary and structure were just too simple and lacking in detail to draw me into Scott's experience at all. This is a unique story that could have been told much better, but the authors failed to bring it to life.

[T. · Rating 5 out of 5]

I checked My Life, Deleted out from my local library. I very rarely read non-fiction. I have enough challenges in my own life without hearing about other people's, but I came across this book in a blog and the blurb caught my attention.

Geez, your whole life wiped away. No memories, no concept of time, or relationships. No understanding of what 'wife' means, and worried this caring person will abandon you once their job, whatever it is (what does a wife do? What is family? What is a home?), is complete. The story is riveting, and scary, and heartbreaking. The lack of emotion in this retelling, gives the reader a glimpse of the lack of emotional connection to people had very close relationships to before his accident. Yet, the reader is side-by-side with Scott as he relearns how to build a life, and how to reconnect to people he no longer recognizes: wife, kids, friends.

I was up until 3am, reading straight through in one sitting. Moral of this story, don't start this book before bed. Highly recommend this book about an amazing individual, the story lacks drama, but I think this further emphasized his despair and lost feelings.

[Cheryl · Rating 4 out of 5]

Scott Bolzan, a successful businessman and former NFL offensive lineman, was on his way up to his office in a downtown Phoenix office building when he decided to stop off at a restroom on the main level. As he entered, he slipped on something. His feet flew out from under him and he fell backward, hitting his head so hard on the tile floor that it split open to the bone. The result of this accident left Scott with the worst case of retrograde amnesia that had ever been recorded. In this heartfelt memoir, Mr. Bolzan recounts the challenges he has faced in his attempt to resume a normal life--without hope of ever regaining his memory. With the love of his family and friends, this brave man has slowly begun a new life. This engrossing story about perseverance, love, courage, and determination is humbling to read.

[Abbi Sudbrock · Rating 5 out of 5]

I think this was a really good book. It was a good book for multiple reasons. I really enjoyed this because it informed me about retrograde amnesia which I really haven't learned much about before. It's very interesting to learn about. Scott goes through many different struggles with his son addicted to very bad drugs and struggling to keep his marriage alive. He learns not to take his life for granted and to appreciate the little things in life. It is a very inspiring book. I don't think this book has a personal connection to me because I've never been in this position before. Also, I would recommend this to anyone who wants a good fast read. Retrograde amnesia is not very common.

[Jess Gebhart · Rating 1 out of 5]

Meh. This memoir was terribly written. I did enjoy reading about his experience and found myself cheering for him to get his memories back. The writing style didn't flow much and I didn't find myself flipping the pages in great anticipation of how it would turn out. I did however find it incredible that he survived such an experience and that he had such great support.

[Wanda · Rating 4 out of 5]

I loved the book. Lots of food for thought. We are really defined by our memories. I would like to have understood a bit more why the apparent lack of pursuit of legal action, especially in light of the fact that Scott's life changed so dramatically. I would recommend this book as a must read.

[Mamie]

Inspiring! Makes you think about how the past shapes your future!

[Mediaman · Rating 1 out of 5]

Depressing, uninspiring book that might have made a decent magazine article but has almost nothing in it worth reading. Scott falls on a bathroom floor, losing his memory. Then the book switches to minute details of things he can't recall and how he is glued to the TV to learn about life. His family having Christmas a week after the accident and "who cares?" details are given about presents, family members, friends, why they take their tree down the day after Christmas, etc. But it's never explained why he can conceptualize some things but not others.

The problem is that they are a rich family. He's a former NFL player and flies jets. They own six expensive cars, a $350,000 boat, and his business has multiple private planes. We are supposed to feel sorry when suddenly he can't work anymore and they start to have to sell off their possessions. It's never explained why he doesn't take a different type of job or why his wife's health care income isn't able to sustain them.

Add to that side stories of the loss of their first child as a baby and their adult son becoming a drug addict where nothing seems to help. This is one downer of a book.

Through it all the facts are stated Dragnet style with no emotion. I kept thinking "who cares?" throughout the book because of the way they chose to tell the story. Why is Scott telling this first person when he obviously can't recall anything? He merely communicates what someone like his wife has told him but it's all in his name--it would have been better to have an objective writer or possibly the wife doing the first person narration. Does he really have some of the thoughts he claims in the book? It's so hard to tell what's true and what's an attempt to pull together a narrative from a man with no memory!

It also raises a lot of questions that the authors overlook, such as why didn't he sue the owners of the building in which he fell? Why is his past felony record brushed over in just a couple paragraphs? And why did he live a life where he refused to speak publicly or appear in photos? Doctors in a number of places suspected that Bolzan was faking his memory loss due to a court case and there is some evidence here that there is reason to be suspicious.

Then the end comes, just two years after the accident, and he still isn't better, his son is still an addict, his wife is complaining that she can't stand Scott's temper, and their daughter leaves for college. No resolution, no inspiration. I didn't feel like I understood amnesia any better than when I started.

This couple simply put this together too soon since nothing in their lives was resolved and their lives end up much worse than simply his losing his memory. The irony is the book starts with him saying what a great happy family he had. That was totally not true, and if anything this is a message on how ridiculous it is for a rich family to gather possessions thinking it will give them stability, pretending all is well, when in truth all it took was one foot slipping in a bathroom to make their elitist lifestyle worthless.

[Jessica Reed · Rating 5 out of 5]

First of all to John about calling his wife morbid for still holding on to a child she lost. A mother lost her child and her husband no longer shares that burden. There’s a reason people say “a child’s death is the worst pain in the world.” Now, everyone saying they can’t relate or don’t feel sorry for him because they talk about all they had. The man woke up to no memories at all. The thought of waking up not knowing my own child or who I am is a horrible thought. Before the accident they had a pretty luxurious lifestyle, but the business that was making his money he no longer knows how to operate it. They went from living one kind of lifestyle to now worrying about how they are going to pay their bills because let’s face it, they had a lot of shit, so they probably had A LOT of bills. I’m sure all of that seemed like it was going to disappear with the main breadwinner no longer capable of working. He was pretty much a newborn learning it all. The man being loaded at one point doesn’t make his experience any less terrible. Oh, he’s got money. So he doesn’t deserve sympathy. Money doesn’t mean shit if you have no memories of who you are. To the ones that feel his amnesia is somewhat of a lie. He’a got medical proof of having hardly any blood flow to his long term memory. I’m pretty sure he’s suffered multiple concussions with playing high school, college, and the NFL football. I’ve suffered 3 concussions and after the 3rd it get easier and worse each time you get another one. So, him “barely” hitting his head with another concussion could 100% cause him to have memory loss. Plenty of scientific evidence of how hard long term football playing is on your brain to the point that long term ball players have a higher chance in developing Alzheimer’s.

[Anita Housley · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lost memories and rebuilt life

Having seen Scott and Joan Bolzan on a rerun of Dr. Phil, I became interested in learning more in depth about their story. I'm so glad I found the book on Kindle. It's a quick read, well-written and an absorbing subject. Scott lost his total memory following a fall and blow to his head. He forgot not only all the people he had ever known, but all his social and business knowledge, leaving him incapable of making a living to support his family. His efforts and total support of his wife Joan made it possible for him to rebuild his life, even though he never regained his memory. My only "discomfort" with the book is his frequent mention of their worry about their financial difficulties, which are interspersed with tales about their occasional trips and stays in expensive hotel suites. I felt a little less sympathy for them when they took these perks for granted. All in all, I found the book a fascinating retelling of a highly unusual tale.

[Nicole · Rating 1 out of 5]

Scott Bolzan had an accident where he hit his head in 2008, and, as a result, lost all of his memory. This book is about that accident and coping through the following 1-2 years.

I could empathize with some of Scott Bolzan’s struggles, but, mostly, I was annoyed with this book.

First, the writing is not good. It’s very basic, with superfluous details. Particularly in the beginning, he comes across as bragging more than describing things. I get it that some of his thoughts on the excess in his life changed after the accident, but I didn’t need a specific list of all of the designer names from his watch collection, for example, to get the idea that the collection was unnecessary.

Second, ugh, all of the comments on manliness, being a man, not being weak, not being feminine. I did stick through to the end, and I think there was some humbling of this opinion, but it was incredibly annoying.

The positive to this book is that some of the proceeds from royalties were donated to a brain injury organization and a children’s hospital.

[Michael · Rating 3 out of 5]

I'm not going to say it was a great story because it was very depressing. It was interesting to read how Scott overcame losing his memory in a slip and fell in a public restroom losing every memory he had.

He uses sitcoms to determine how he should act during holidays, reality television to deal and act with another family member dealing with addiction, and he uses Google to help figure out things we take for granted like reselling cars, watches or helping his daughter apply for loans and grants to attend college. Not to mention the continuation of a marriage that he remembers nothing about.

It is scary to think that a person could be him or herself one minute and because of an accident absolutely remember nothing minutes later. Scott does a great job telling his story and conveying his message.

[Steven Cini · Rating 2 out of 5]

There's not enough creativity or compelling writing put into this memoir to give it a chance. I picked up the book because I'm trying to research about amnesia. Unfortunately, I didn't find out what it's like to go through daily life with amnesia because Scott Bolzan insists on completely avoiding any scene that would describe it. Instead, we just get that the man's 'head hurt,' or that he was 'anxious'.

When he was talking about beating his son to death because he was taking drugs, it seemed less frustrated and more like the confessions of a madman. I couldn't identify with anything the author talked about because of lack of writing skills. Is very unfortunate because there's a very compelling story under the lack of writing skills.

[Barb Beyer · Rating 3 out of 5]

Sounded like a very interesting read, and the beginning was. But the more I read, the less I liked it. Spoiler but his explanation of his felony conviction sounds quite slanted and blown off. The way he treats his troubled, addicted son is shameful! No wonder his son is troubled ... sounds like this kid could do nothing right in his father's eyes! Grrr. Didn't like hearing about his financial problems in one breath and plans for a Hawaiian vacation in the next! I'm positive he sued for the fall that caused his amnesia but there's not much about that. I just didn't/couldn't have empathy for this guy. Instead of trying to be a hero to a young girl who also had trauma induced amnesia, he should be soul searching to find a way to love his own son! Sorry, not a big fan.

[Catherine Arne · Rating 4 out of 5]

Fascinating life experience

This is a fascinating true story about a man who has complete amnesia and must struggle to figure out who he is when he can’t remember who he was. It raises all sorts of questions about identity and memory and what makes us who we are. I was particularly interested in what things stayed the same and what parts changed in his tastes, personality, and values.