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Sunset - On the Passing of Those We Love
During the last months and weeks of his wife s life, Michael Wilcox kept a journal to record what he was learning about living, loving, and grieving. Although at the time he did not intend that it would ever be published, he explains, There has been a continent shift in my life which will be understood by many who have been where I am. I offer my own passage, hoping it may lift others who share the path with me, or who will one day find themselves on the same road, hoping someone left a few signposts to help them find their way. Beautifully written, this is a thoughtful and sensitive book that delivers an unflinchingly honest look at enduring the loss of a loved one.
135 pages, Hardcover
First published January 1, 2011
10 people are currently reading
148 people want to read
About the author
S. Michael Wilcox
53 books143 followersS. Michael Wilcox is an instructor at the institute of religion adjacent to the University of Utah. A frequent speaker at Brigham Young University Education Week, Michael also conducts tours of the Holy Land, Church history sites, Europe, China, and Central America. He received a bachelor’s degree in English literature from Brigham Young University, a master’s in media from the University of Arizona, and his Ph.D. from the University of Colorado in educational philosophy. He is the author of House of Glory and When Your Prayers Seem Unanswered.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 77 reviews
April 3, 2012
Michael Wilcox was a teacher of mine about 35 years ago in Alberta, Canada. He and his wife, Laurie, will forever be in my memory as major contributors in my life. I had initially picked up the book after noticing his name as the author. Then...as if by fate...realized that it was a book about the death of his Laurie. I found this book two weeks after losing my own sweet husband. Every word and thought he wrote, I had thought but could not write. It was truly a Godsend for me. As I read, I felt "normal" in my grieving. I realized that some of my thoughts about my husband, which I had initially thought were crazy and selfish, we not. Knowing that someone else felt like I did helped me find more peace.
September 12, 2012
What a heart-wrenching book! Beautifully (almost poetically) written, but also very raw in its expression of love lost - I had to read it in small doses since I cried on nearly every page. As a younger widow myself, there were lots of feelings and fears I could relate to and some that I have not experienced at all, but I've discovered that grief is an extremely personal thing that affects everyone differently, and it certainly isn't subject to rational thought or a predictable timeline. Kudos to Bro. Wilcox for his honest and touching description of his struggles.
February 16, 2012
A poignant read of love and loss. At times a very poetic read. What a sweet story of love amidst the grief of losing one's spouse. Having been a part of much loss in the past few years I love when I find a book that truly expresses feelings that accompany grief. Grief can be a very lonely road. The author hopes that through his honest heartfelt words..."May it be a small permission for all to feel what they feel without wondering if they somehow lack faith or conviction or sufficient love - who question if what they are experiencing is normal, or healthy, or proper."
While I have underlined and marked much of this book, a favorite part is the comparison he makes to the love story of Jacob and Rachel. Another noteworthy comment was that, "The soul was not made by God to be sorrow's home. He would have us be happy."
While I have underlined and marked much of this book, a favorite part is the comparison he makes to the love story of Jacob and Rachel. Another noteworthy comment was that, "The soul was not made by God to be sorrow's home. He would have us be happy."
October 1, 2012
Thank you Megan Crandall for giving me this book (written by her father Michael Wilcox). This was a wonderful way to grieve and celebrate my mother's death. It also made me feel normal for all the things I was thinking and feeling. Thank you. This is the perfect book/gift for anyone who has lost a loved one.
February 13, 2012
This is the best book My dad has ever written. It is about his journey of losing my mother. It would be perfect for anyone who has ever lost a loved one.
September 8, 2019
How do you rate someone's grief? I feel inadequate to rate this book. Michael Wilcox portrayed his grief with honesty and compassion. He loved his wife and this tribute to her is beautiful.
However, this book left me disturbed and with a greater sense of grief than before I started it. Thus, I could not finish. The is book written about, and in my opinion, ONLY for the loss of a spouse--and not just any spouse but a "one and only you" spouse. I picked up the book to read after my father died. Some things applied to that grief. Most did not. That was not the troubling part, nor the part that earned only two stars. It is the "only you" aspect that was disturbing.
I am the second wife of a man whose first wife passed away from cancer. The grief portrayed here is as if there could never be another beautiful, equally fulfilling relationship in his life. That Laurie is the one, the only, the eternal end of his existence. I realize, this is a journal of his grief, not doctrine. Yet, when a man with such influence as Wilcox presents his story, others think of it as doctrine. If that is truly the case, I have no hope.
I have to believe he is wrong. I have to believe that through the power of Jesus Christ's atonement, there is more love, more hope, and a greater eternity than is bound up in one single individual.
However, this book left me disturbed and with a greater sense of grief than before I started it. Thus, I could not finish. The is book written about, and in my opinion, ONLY for the loss of a spouse--and not just any spouse but a "one and only you" spouse. I picked up the book to read after my father died. Some things applied to that grief. Most did not. That was not the troubling part, nor the part that earned only two stars. It is the "only you" aspect that was disturbing.
I am the second wife of a man whose first wife passed away from cancer. The grief portrayed here is as if there could never be another beautiful, equally fulfilling relationship in his life. That Laurie is the one, the only, the eternal end of his existence. I realize, this is a journal of his grief, not doctrine. Yet, when a man with such influence as Wilcox presents his story, others think of it as doctrine. If that is truly the case, I have no hope.
I have to believe he is wrong. I have to believe that through the power of Jesus Christ's atonement, there is more love, more hope, and a greater eternity than is bound up in one single individual.
January 20, 2026
I loved pretty much everything about this. It was a blind grab, thinking it might be good to read on what it is like to lose someone you love. The book is heart-wrenching, so full of love, and incredibly insightful. I love S. Michael Wilcox's writing style. He used to be beyond me, but I love it now. It is so enriching to read this, particularly from hearing him read it himself. You feel so much along with him. Great read.
March 22, 2025
Obviously, losing a spouse is different from losing a child. This was like a love letter to his wife. It was beautiful although not altogether relatable to me.
April 27, 2022
This is such a poignant and beautiful tribute to a spouse and the emotions attached to the passing of a loved one.
March 4, 2012
Wow! This book is perfect for anyone who lost a loved one, especially a spouse. But it really is for anyone who has ever had to enter that dreaded path of losing any loved one. S. Michael Wilcox wrote in his journal, once his wife started to decline from a brain tumor that would one day take her life. His journal entries alone are very healing and help you to feel "normal" and not crazy. He has been in that awful place of despair and heartbreak and has felt the loneliness it brings. He gives very sound advice that all came from writing about his experience in his journal. As he looked back at all of the wisdom he gained from it, he has since realized that he needed to write this book for others going through the same trial. I absolutely love it so far. I'll definitely be recommending it.
February 3, 2012
I have always loved S. Michael Wilcox's books and hearing him as a speaker. When I found out he was writing a book about the death of his wife, who died from a brain tumor in December 2010, I was really interested to see what insights he would have to share especially having lost my own mom to a similar cancer, While the book is probably more suited for someone losing a spouse, is not chronological in sequence and a big break from his normal writing style,it still helped me to read about his experience and see similarities in both experiences and feelings. I was honestly surprised at some of the feelings, doubts even, he has experienced losing a spouse. It was very eye-opening and helpful for me to understand this point of view. It touched me in unexpected ways.
April 19, 2012
This book impacted me. I am always impressed by honesty, and I realize how truly difficult that is for some people, especially when dealing with death. The diverse feelings experienced by the author were real and raw. I completed the book with a sense of empty yearning for the lost companionship, but also with a sense of peace that the author's beliefs are strong and fortified by a continuous effort to rely on the Lord. I also want to revisit the lives of Elizabeth and Robert Browning. The interweaving of some of the lines from Elizabeth's Sonnets from the Portuguese intrigue me. I had forgotten how beautiful they truly are.
February 21, 2014
This is a pretty short, but emotionally packed book. I read it after losing my Mom and I loved it. There were different things that I went through during the process of losing her that the author touched on that he also experienced, but he put it in much more eloquent words, and the gospel reminders throughout the book were a great comfort to me. He did take some liberties with opinion rather than docterine, but I like thinking about different perspectives, so I enjoyed that. He did lose a wife, so he touches a lot on the marriage relationship, but I found it to be very pertinent to me as having lost a Mom as well.
March 19, 2012
A sweet, honest, tender glimpse at the experience of losing one's spouse. The author's expressions of his deep love for his wife were beautiful and inspirational. His grief and pain over losing her are heartbreaking. I appreciate his openess and honesty and think this book will truly help others who have lost a loved one, but I also think it would be of great benefit to those who have not lost a loved one yet...a poignant reminder to cherish those we love and to be grateful for each and every day we have together.
July 6, 2012
This was one of those rare books that really has changed my perspective on life. My mom had me read this book because my dad passed away. It is written from the viewpoint of an LDS author who lost his wife to cancer a few years ago. It is incredibly written, easy to read, and honestly one of the best books I have ever read. Even if you are not LDS or don't have someone close to you who has died, I would recommend this book - it has helped me look at life through a different lens and really appreciate the things I have in this life.
February 4, 2012
As I read this book, I wondered, "Did Brother Wilcox somehow read my journals over the past two and a half years?" If I was a gifted writer of beautiful prose and thoughtful imagery, I would have written this book. But I'm not, and I'm so glad Michael Wilcox has the talent to express his insights so movingly. If you've lost a spouse, or are wondering what is going on in the mind and heart of someone who has, you will find this book worthwhile reading.
February 6, 2012
For me, Sunset was a love story first and for most. The anguish, and pain of loosing a life partner, and spouse is exposed in Michael Wilcox's ability to share his thoughts and feelings in a most beautiful manner. The grief process, and his willingness to share the most sacred, and difficult moments of this experience. The way he shares his thoughts and emotions so honestly is the endearing gift of the book.
February 13, 2012
Michael Wilcox has opened his heart and shared his most tender and intimate feelings at the loss of his beloved wife.
This little book is beautifully written. I have not lost a spouse, but other loved family members and the insight the author shares is a salve to a grieving heart.
Every person should read this little book. It has helped me recognizes anew how very precious life is..and how precious our spouse is.
Beautiful.
This little book is beautifully written. I have not lost a spouse, but other loved family members and the insight the author shares is a salve to a grieving heart.
Every person should read this little book. It has helped me recognizes anew how very precious life is..and how precious our spouse is.
Beautiful.
April 27, 2012
I really loved this book, but I had to read it in small doses. It made me feel sad and melancholy sometimes. Death is such a personal, and sensitive topic. I appreciated his candor and sincerity about what he suffered at he loss of his wife and how he is trying to face the rest of his earthly life without her. As always with this author, I really appreciate his insight and it really rings true for me. I plan on giving this book to a friend who lost a spouse just a couple of years ago.
March 10, 2012
I cried the entire way through this book. I was privileged to know Laurie in real life and I could hear her voice and laugh echo through the pages as I read. I mourned with Mike as he spoke of his love and doubts as she passed away. This book is not in his regular writing style, it is his journal. What a beautiful love they shared, what a beautiful book this is!
March 5, 2012
This book expressed so many of my own thoughts and feelings after having a spouse die too early from cancer. Some of the author's actions and thoughts were exactly the same as mine: from listening to the same Hillary Weeks song "If I only Had Today" to asking for "Hezekiah time". Amazing ability to express his feelings.
September 24, 2013
Want to know what the aftermath of a spouse's death feels like? Read this book.
Wilcox articulates most profoundly my own emotions since the death of my spouse. I was comforted to know that what I am experiencing is within the norm. I loved every word of this one!
Note: Although anyone could read this, it is primarily intended for an LDS audience.
Wilcox articulates most profoundly my own emotions since the death of my spouse. I was comforted to know that what I am experiencing is within the norm. I loved every word of this one!
Note: Although anyone could read this, it is primarily intended for an LDS audience.
November 16, 2014
This was a moving tribute to his deceased wife. Made me cry and at times I felt almost as if I were eavesdropping on something so personal. I was going to give it to a friend who just lost a daughter, but found it inappropriate for that situation. I would suggest only as a read for someone who has lost a spouse.
March 10, 2012
A beautifully written account of the death of a beloved spouse. Sweet, tender, poetic at times and always heartfelt this book is wonderful. As I read I was inspired to make each day count and to show greater love to all the people in my life.
May 14, 2012
Pretty heart wrenching to read first hand words from a husband who has just lost the love of his life. The reality that this will happen to us all hit home. Crazy the thoughts that you have as you struggle with death. Sad, yet inspiring. Appreciating life a lot more this week.
July 11, 2012
I felt that this book was mostly a love story. I had expected advice on how to deal with the death of a loved one but found instead a poignant, raw-emotional, story of love and loss. Mostly, this book just made me want to be a better wife.
November 17, 2014
Reads like a love letter to his wife. Beautiful, thought-provoking. I read it because my brother-in-law said it was one of the few books that has helped him since my sister's death. The author was extremely open and honest. Loved it.
June 8, 2014
One of the most beautiful and moving books I have ever read. I will read it again.
May 17, 2025
This is a poignant and heart-wrenching essay about loss, grief, faith, and belief in eternal families. Michael Wilcox’s very personal story about losing Laurie, his beloved wife of 41 years, from brain cancer when she was 57 is laced with many tears and sentimental memories, but most of all hope.
This short, bittersweet book is a good choice to keep on hand for rereading when one seeks comfort over loss and empathy in grief. “Grief is love’s shadow. It is cast over me now by the loss of Laurie, but it need not block the sunlight. That light is always shining above the clouds somewhere, and though I cannot currently feel it rays, I assume she can, and there is comfort in that” (4)
Wilcox references the love between married poets Robert and Elizabeth Barrett Browning, and begins each chapter with a quote from the “Sonnets from the Portuguese” written by Elizabeth to Robert.
There are many scriptural references as well. Particularly touching is the recalling of Hezakiah’s story from Isaiah 38. When Hezakiah became ill, he asked God to grant him health and more time to live and was granted 15 years more of earthly life. Sadly, for Laurie Wilcox this was not to be. Wilcox copes with his grief through fond memories of their life together, taking trips to places they both loved (his voyage to Antarctica, one of their favorite spots, that he took just days after Laurie’s death is particularly touching), and his hope that they will be united in the next life. “Laurie is simply ‘there.’ . . . . . I hope she can make her own list of things and people and vistas that she will share with me when we are reunited and can look across at each other again as well as away to what she has discovered and found beautiful, but could not totally enjoy until we gazed on it together” (71).
He concludes, “To those who know what it is to lament a dear one’s passing—and ultimately that will be all of us who love—may that love be intensified, rounded on the bedrock of our deepest souls, and made holy by the separation. . . . . May your sunsets be bright with time’s remembered fullnesses. And during the dark hours, when the midnight thoughts turn in the mind may the hope of an awaiting sunrise, on an eternal morning, light your hearts forever” (134).
This short, bittersweet book is a good choice to keep on hand for rereading when one seeks comfort over loss and empathy in grief. “Grief is love’s shadow. It is cast over me now by the loss of Laurie, but it need not block the sunlight. That light is always shining above the clouds somewhere, and though I cannot currently feel it rays, I assume she can, and there is comfort in that” (4)
Wilcox references the love between married poets Robert and Elizabeth Barrett Browning, and begins each chapter with a quote from the “Sonnets from the Portuguese” written by Elizabeth to Robert.
There are many scriptural references as well. Particularly touching is the recalling of Hezakiah’s story from Isaiah 38. When Hezakiah became ill, he asked God to grant him health and more time to live and was granted 15 years more of earthly life. Sadly, for Laurie Wilcox this was not to be. Wilcox copes with his grief through fond memories of their life together, taking trips to places they both loved (his voyage to Antarctica, one of their favorite spots, that he took just days after Laurie’s death is particularly touching), and his hope that they will be united in the next life. “Laurie is simply ‘there.’ . . . . . I hope she can make her own list of things and people and vistas that she will share with me when we are reunited and can look across at each other again as well as away to what she has discovered and found beautiful, but could not totally enjoy until we gazed on it together” (71).
He concludes, “To those who know what it is to lament a dear one’s passing—and ultimately that will be all of us who love—may that love be intensified, rounded on the bedrock of our deepest souls, and made holy by the separation. . . . . May your sunsets be bright with time’s remembered fullnesses. And during the dark hours, when the midnight thoughts turn in the mind may the hope of an awaiting sunrise, on an eternal morning, light your hearts forever” (134).
January 12, 2022
Michael Wilcox was a guest speaker on a Sunday on Monday podcast in 2021. He shared a bit about losing his life, Laurie to brain cancer. He also shared an experience about having a terrible dream--the worst he had ever had and praying for a good dream to replace it. In the good dream he was with Laurie, riding on a bus. He describes the sunlight in her hair, her head on his shoulder and her asking him if he still loved her. The scene then changed to Michael and Laurie walking alongside a river, each on different banks. They were headed the same direction, but just separated by this river. They seemed to feel like this was normal and natural to have the river between them. At one point Michael looked away from Laurie and focused on the water, and when he looked up she was gone. But he knew he'd see her up ahead where the land made a bridge over the river.
This image was so lovely and reassuring that I shared it with my step-mom who was mourning the joint losses of her first husband, and then of her 2nd husband, my dad.
After his telling of the dream I decided to read this book.
I haven't lost a spouse, and I'm actually a bit torn about whether or not to recommend this book to people that have. One the one hand, it could feel a bit like a support group--to hear of someone else going through what you're going through. However, Michael's love for Laurie is undying. This view into his life and grief is gut wrenching and raw. It's so personal that at times it can feel a bit uncomfortable. I had to take breaks between reading chapters because--even though my spouse is here, it made me so sad.
I also think that people who feel like they can move on, perhaps even remarry after the loss of a spouse, might feel a bit guilty by comparison. Michael Wilcox is a very strong pair-bonder. To Laurie. She is his one and only. He writes that he'll never get married again. He's very romantic. His writing is very beautiful and poetic. But it is also so full of anguish and sadness. And some tender mercies from the Lord.
This image was so lovely and reassuring that I shared it with my step-mom who was mourning the joint losses of her first husband, and then of her 2nd husband, my dad.
After his telling of the dream I decided to read this book.
I haven't lost a spouse, and I'm actually a bit torn about whether or not to recommend this book to people that have. One the one hand, it could feel a bit like a support group--to hear of someone else going through what you're going through. However, Michael's love for Laurie is undying. This view into his life and grief is gut wrenching and raw. It's so personal that at times it can feel a bit uncomfortable. I had to take breaks between reading chapters because--even though my spouse is here, it made me so sad.
I also think that people who feel like they can move on, perhaps even remarry after the loss of a spouse, might feel a bit guilty by comparison. Michael Wilcox is a very strong pair-bonder. To Laurie. She is his one and only. He writes that he'll never get married again. He's very romantic. His writing is very beautiful and poetic. But it is also so full of anguish and sadness. And some tender mercies from the Lord.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 77 reviews