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I Really Should Have Stayed Home: The Worst Journeys from Harare to Eternity
The trip of a lifetime, or a life sentence? Disasters that can't wait to happen are guaranteed to make you unfasten your seatbelt for the belly laugh of the travel season. As you try to figure out why your wallet just disappeared, relax and be glad you weren't along for the ride with... Marius Bosc as the entire waitstaff of a New York restaurant began attacking him after he tried to send back his lo mein. Claudia Capos as she sat down to a splendid anteater served for a Tasmanian Thanksgiving. Brooke Comer hitching a ride through Upper Egypt on top of a pickup bed full of unripe melons. Matthew FIke when a coed in one of his English classes in Bulgaria announced "I need to be with you in your bed." Nadine Payne when she was kicked off Romania's "Orient Distress" on a rail line in the middle of nowhere. Cameron Burns on his honeymoon as his wife discovered a poisonous eight-inch long scorpion crawling down her blue cotton t-shirt. Zona Sage as she and a flight crew worked feverishly to track down a putrid smell that makes a jet's interior smell like a sewer. Larry Parker as a stream of overnight freight trains rolled past the window of his Oregon bed and breakfast. Carole Dickerson shipwrecked with her family on a dream vacation. William Douglass as monkeys danced about his Kenya lodge room in his wife Jan's nightgown. A welcome addition to the literature of the damned, this book rolls up the welcome mat as it makes you rethink those vacation plans. Yes, in this outragenously funny anthology of vacation horror stories you'll spend one too many nights in Tunisia and flee nightmarish holidays that stretch from Harare to Eternity.
- GenresTravelNonfiction
294 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2001
29 people want to read
About the author
Roger Rapoport
47 books1 followerAs a newspaper and magazine writer and aviation specialist Roger Rapoport has written in all 50 states, 6 Canadian provinces, and 30 foreign countries. A lifelong sailor and enthusiastic kayaker, he has traveled extensively throughout the Great Lakes, along the St. Lawrence Seaway and the Atlantic Coast.
Roger Rapoport graduated with a Bachelor's of Arts in Journalism in 1968 from the University of Michigan where he was editor of The Michigan Daily.
While working on a story for Ramparts Magazine he met his first wife, Margot Lind. They had a son & daughter and later divorced in 1993.
In 1978, Rapoport began to work at California newspapers, including The San Jose Mercury-News, the San Francisco Chronicle & the Oakland Tribune.
In 1991 Rapoport went to work for Ulysses Press in Berkeley learning about the publishing business.
In 1993 he launched his own publishing effort, RDR Books in Oakland, CA and has since published more than 60 books.
Rapoport met Martha Ferriby, director of Hackley Public Library, while in Michigan in 1995. They married in 2000.
Rapoport moved to Michigan in 2004.
In 2007 RDR became a defendant in the seminal fair use case J.K. Rowling. v. RDR Books, aka The Harry Potter Lexicon Case. Rapoport and Steve Vander Ark, founder of “The Harry Potter Lexicon” website had sought to publish a book version of the Vander Ark's Potter fans' website.
Author J.K. Rowling and Warner Bros. claimed copyright infringement. RDR Books claimed the right to publish under the fair use doctrine.
Although RDR lost the case, Judge Robert B. Patterson Jr. awarded the plaintiffs less than $7,000 in damages for infringement, the minimum amount possible.
Judge Patterson concluded that "reference guides in general, including the Lexicon, are transformative in nature and capable of fair use protection, and that the Lexicon could be published with less appropriation from the original works. "
On January 16, 2009, RDR Books released The Lexicon: An Unauthorized Guide to Harry Potter Fiction and Related Materials including more commentary than before the suit.
For more information see: Right to Write.
RDR Books is now closed. Most of the former RDR Book titles are now available from Ashley Creek Books.
Books written and edited by Roger Rapoport are now available from New Lake Books and Lexographic Press.
Rapoport published Steven Faulkner's Waterwalk. With Richard Harris he has since co-produced and adapted Faulkner's story for a film starring Robert Cicchini.
Roger Rapoport graduated with a Bachelor's of Arts in Journalism in 1968 from the University of Michigan where he was editor of The Michigan Daily.
While working on a story for Ramparts Magazine he met his first wife, Margot Lind. They had a son & daughter and later divorced in 1993.
In 1978, Rapoport began to work at California newspapers, including The San Jose Mercury-News, the San Francisco Chronicle & the Oakland Tribune.
In 1991 Rapoport went to work for Ulysses Press in Berkeley learning about the publishing business.
In 1993 he launched his own publishing effort, RDR Books in Oakland, CA and has since published more than 60 books.
Rapoport met Martha Ferriby, director of Hackley Public Library, while in Michigan in 1995. They married in 2000.
Rapoport moved to Michigan in 2004.
In 2007 RDR became a defendant in the seminal fair use case J.K. Rowling. v. RDR Books, aka The Harry Potter Lexicon Case. Rapoport and Steve Vander Ark, founder of “The Harry Potter Lexicon” website had sought to publish a book version of the Vander Ark's Potter fans' website.
Author J.K. Rowling and Warner Bros. claimed copyright infringement. RDR Books claimed the right to publish under the fair use doctrine.
Although RDR lost the case, Judge Robert B. Patterson Jr. awarded the plaintiffs less than $7,000 in damages for infringement, the minimum amount possible.
Judge Patterson concluded that "reference guides in general, including the Lexicon, are transformative in nature and capable of fair use protection, and that the Lexicon could be published with less appropriation from the original works. "
On January 16, 2009, RDR Books released The Lexicon: An Unauthorized Guide to Harry Potter Fiction and Related Materials including more commentary than before the suit.
For more information see: Right to Write.
RDR Books is now closed. Most of the former RDR Book titles are now available from Ashley Creek Books.
Books written and edited by Roger Rapoport are now available from New Lake Books and Lexographic Press.
Rapoport published Steven Faulkner's Waterwalk. With Richard Harris he has since co-produced and adapted Faulkner's story for a film starring Robert Cicchini.
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Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews
December 22, 2011
This book is a third sequel to a book of established writers’ travel horror stories. Here, amateur writers share their travel woes. It is, clearly, an attempt to milk a cash cow. While the writing is adequate (certainly not great), it’s the content of the stories that really makes this a useless anthology. They’re the quality of story you might tell your friends at dinner, but are in no way deserving of publication.
Examples include: I was on a plane that was delayed; I couldn’t find my car after the Super Bowl; we rented a boat and wrecked it; the service at this restaurant in England was very slow; we went to a hotel and damned if it wasn’t a fairly shabby hotel; we ate some food and got sick. There are a few stories as interesting as, say, getting hurt and experiencing Vietnam’s standard of hospital care. But mostly this is very dull, and pretty close to worthless.
Examples include: I was on a plane that was delayed; I couldn’t find my car after the Super Bowl; we rented a boat and wrecked it; the service at this restaurant in England was very slow; we went to a hotel and damned if it wasn’t a fairly shabby hotel; we ate some food and got sick. There are a few stories as interesting as, say, getting hurt and experiencing Vietnam’s standard of hospital care. But mostly this is very dull, and pretty close to worthless.
December 1, 2019
This book is dull. In fact, it’s ‘sign-up-for-an-account-to-save-the-next-potential-reader’ dull.
The writing quality is mediocre at best, but that could be forgiven if the content was actually worth reading.
It is very much a collection of slightly unscheduled stuff happening to people when travelling very much on the beaten track. No, please, tell me more about how Kenyan cuisine primarily consists of rice and beans, or how your flight was a bit delayed.
Gave up after less than ten chapters.
The writing quality is mediocre at best, but that could be forgiven if the content was actually worth reading.
It is very much a collection of slightly unscheduled stuff happening to people when travelling very much on the beaten track. No, please, tell me more about how Kenyan cuisine primarily consists of rice and beans, or how your flight was a bit delayed.
Gave up after less than ten chapters.
May 17, 2022
Easy read on your travels
April 20, 2013
An anteater served for Thanksgiving in Tasmania? Yes, that event is in here!
Liked the local color of the tale "What a View!", about a visit to a Bed and Breakfast in the Columbia River Gorge. Every 20 minutes a long train would rumble by the B & B all night, keeping the story author up. "But we have a view" the kids would keep saying.
"Day Trip to Denver" was quite a horror story of misadventures by railroad and car during a tour in which 3 meals in a row were missed by a group way behind schedule.
I hope to never have the experience related in "This is a Test" by Priscilla Burgess. During a flight over-the-pole, the cockpit broadcast a message to the travelers on board: "This plane is going to make an emergency landing in water." After the passengers panic, a clarification comes over the PA: "Sorry, please disregard that message--there is a problem with the automatic flight warning system."
What a scare that must have been, as people started preparing to meet their maker.
Liked the local color of the tale "What a View!", about a visit to a Bed and Breakfast in the Columbia River Gorge. Every 20 minutes a long train would rumble by the B & B all night, keeping the story author up. "But we have a view" the kids would keep saying.
"Day Trip to Denver" was quite a horror story of misadventures by railroad and car during a tour in which 3 meals in a row were missed by a group way behind schedule.
I hope to never have the experience related in "This is a Test" by Priscilla Burgess. During a flight over-the-pole, the cockpit broadcast a message to the travelers on board: "This plane is going to make an emergency landing in water." After the passengers panic, a clarification comes over the PA: "Sorry, please disregard that message--there is a problem with the automatic flight warning system."
What a scare that must have been, as people started preparing to meet their maker.
May 31, 2015
I think less time was spent editing in this book. The first book was hilarious and each story was brief but well written. This book has a endless story about a disgraced teacher in Eastern Europe. He should have been fired just for referencing a book he obviously never read. Lolita is the a book written by a pedophile and how he can trap an innocent girl, Delores, not a young temptresses like the Hollywood movies. The story's inclusion was boring and a bit disturbing but NoT funny. The rest of the stores were uneven--some charming, some funny, and some just groaners leaving you thinking, "Just because you choose to be stupid isn't charming or humorous-- like deciding to dribble a soccer ball while hiking?" Caliber of feeding a wild animal by hand for a great photo and then having to get a series of rabies shots for the bite.
July 22, 2012
These people are in need of a good editor. Funny things may happen to you, but that doesn't make you a good writer...
October 20, 2012
stories of travel gone bad
December 4, 2023
DNF - doesn't deserve a star
May 4, 2014
This book is just so amazing. Utterly brilliant comedy.
Displaying 1 - 9 of 9 reviews