Teach Them Diligently: How To Use The Scriptures In Child Training

by Lou Priolo

Most of today's Christian parenting resources fail to emphasize what is perhaps the most important aspect of true biblical parenting. That is, how to relate the Bible to the raising of our children in actual, practical ways. Whatever else you are doing to equip your children, do you really know how to use the Bible for doctrine, reproof, correction, and instruction in righteousness with your children? In Teach Them Diligently Lou Priolo has given a tool that will strengthen you in this vital area.

Genres: Parenting, Christian, Counselling, Nonfiction, Family, Spirituality, Education

170 pages, Paperback

First published September 30, 2000

About the author

LOU PRIOLO is the Director of Biblical Counseling at Eastwood Presbyterian Church in Montgomery, Alabama. A graduate of Calvary Bible College and Liberty University, he is the author of The Heart of Anger , and The Complete Husband. Lou is also a Fellow in the National Association of Nouthetic Counselors. He resides in Wetumpka, Alabama with his wife, Kim, and daughters, Sophia and Gabriella.

Reviews

[Randall Hartman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Our daughter and son-in-law gave us this book to help us understand their intentions and objectives in raising their children, our delightful grandchildren. :) Having read the content of this book and observing their child-rearing in action for nearly five years, I cannot overstate how highly I recommend this book. As a parent, grandparent, or anyone serious about living life conformed to Christ and helping others do the same, it is an outstanding resource, encouragement, and practical guide. It challenged me to break out of my spiritual laziness and obey God's command to know the scriptures, live them, explain what they mean, and apply them...not just facts to be learned but truths to be applied. For those most directly involved in child-rearing, it covers how to teach, convict, correct, train, and discipline using God's word. For all of us, it shows the importance of scheduling life around knowing God through His word and developing both right patterns of thinking and good habits that help produce the righteousness of Christ in daily life. Excellent book.

[Ryan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Excellent parenting book, arranged around the four uses of the Bible from 2 Tim 3:16: teaching, conviction, correction, training in righteousness. Priolo encourages parents to view their kids from a spiritual perspective, instead of a pop psychology perspective.

Contains very practical method for introducing the word of God into your child's life, then helping them grow into a mature Christian. It addresses behavior, but by focusing on the heart of the matter instead of the outward symptoms.

[Lexy Sauve · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was SO helpful practically. I know I have tons of parenting/studying work before me, but I feel like this book have tools to me that previous generations probably saw more clearly displayed in family settings, but failed to pass on. This book shows that parenting is a skill you can grow in with biblical help. A must read for parents.

[The Reading Pilgrim · Rating 5 out of 5]

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

This is one of the most biblically grounded and practically helpful parenting books I’ve read. Lou Priolo doesn’t offer quick fixes or superficial strategies for behavior modification. Instead, he anchors his counsel firmly in Scripture, teaching parents how to shepherd their children’s hearts toward Christ through consistent, diligent, and gospel-saturated discipleship.

A Scripture-Driven Approach to Parenting

What sets this book apart is its unwavering commitment to using the Bible as the central tool for parenting. Priolo challenges the common tendency to lean on psychology, behavior charts, or moralism, and instead calls Christian parents to rely on God’s Word as the ultimate standard and means for heart transformation. From teaching children how to confess sin biblically, to using specific verses as corrective tools, the approach is refreshingly countercultural.

Rather than giving a list of "dos and don’ts," the book emphasizes the importance of training children to think biblically, convicting them with Scripture, and helping them evaluate their own hearts in light of God’s Word. This is training in righteousness, not just obedience.

Deeply Practical Tools

I found the sections on confession, repentance, and replacing sinful behavior with biblical alternatives especially helpful. The “put off/put on” dynamic from Ephesians 4 is explained and applied in a way that is both faithful to the text and easy to implement with children. The book includes sample conversations, charts, and questions parents can use to help their children develop godly habits and character.

One of my favorite parts was the emphasis on teaching children to use Scripture for self-examination. This cultivates not just obedience, but a heart that trembles at God’s Word and seeks transformation.

Firm, but Not Harsh

Priolo writes with conviction, clarity, and a deep pastoral heart. He encourages loving, patient correction that mirrors how the Lord disciplines His children—not with anger or shame, but with grace and truth. There is also a convicting section on the dangers of hypocrisy and inconsistency in parenting, which was a necessary reminder that our own example often speaks louder than our correction.

For Parents Who Want More Than Behavior Change

This book is not for the parent who just wants a better-behaved child. It’s for the parent who wants to raise a disciple of Jesus Christ. It’s for those who are willing to labor with love, prayer, and the Word of God in hand. It’s not a light or fluffy parenting book—it’s rich, challenging, and profoundly biblical.

If you're a Christian parent longing to disciple your children in the fear of the Lord, Teach Them Diligently is essential reading. I’ll be returning to it again and again in different seasons of parenting.

[Emily Douglas · Rating 4 out of 5]

Really loved this biblical counseling guide, I will definitely be using it as a resource in both my own parenting and counseling.

[H.S. · Rating 2 out of 5]

I really tried to love this book. The premise is good and right. We cannot raise our children without addressing the heart. But sadly it is a DNF for me. The language of the absolutes in this book was not helpful to me and prevents me from recommending it.

Saying that if I’m not spanking my child, I’m disobeying God. The author emphasizes that it should be used with every child: “The rod is the only specific means the Bible designates when it addresses the discipline of children. Therefore, it should be used consistently with every child.“ Additionally, “The spanking must be sufficiently robust to make an impression. If you have followed [these] guidelines... and your child is still angry and sullen after the spanking, you probably have not spanked hard enough or long enough.” As a foster and adoptive parent, I’m simply not allowed to lay hands on children, does that mean I’m disobeying God? And if not, what am I to do instead?

The author also pits mental health against sin entirely dismissing the former. “You’ll never find the biblical solution for rebellion, anger, or insubordination by looking up (even) in the most exhaustive concordance the term Oppositional Defiance Disorder”.

While there are many great truths to be extracted from this book, I felt like it was so muddied that I just couldn’t keep going trying to sift out the gold from the dirt. Maybe it’ll be helpful to you, but I’m sure some other resources, such as Charlotte Mason, would be much better help.

[Anete Ābola · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an excellent Christian parenting book. It teaches parents how to teach, convict, correct and train with the Scriptures. And it reminds us that our first priority is to have relationship with The Lord + to study His Word. There is no other way that we could be able to successfully use Scriptures discipling our kids.

Author prompts you to plan your schedule around God's Word not just to try to squeeze the Bible into your already full schedule. Such a good advice! I am often convicted with the thought that if I would know the Bible more, I would be a much better (read: more biblical/more godly) parent. Let's strive to become such parents now!

This is one of the top parenting books along with Paul David Tripp's "Shepherding a Child's heart" and "Instructing a child's heart", John MacArthur's "Successful Christian parenting" and other books by Lou Priolo.

[Sarah DeKoekkoek · Rating 4 out of 5]

I appreciated the practical tools in this book to live out biblical parenting. He provided examples on how to use Scripture, rather than simply setting the foundation for why we should incorporate Scripture into our parenting as believers. Helpful for thinking through how my training, teaching, disciplining, etc. should look different than the world’s child rearing philosophies (even if those aren’t inherently wrong).

[Andi Hagen · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great book! A few things in here I didn’t particularly agree with but overall some great concepts and encouragement for teaching your children using Scriptures. You can’t teach your children Gods Word if you are not actively in Scriptures yourself.

[Kelly Fauver · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the best parenting books I've read with great practical wisdom.

[Kyli Blanks · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the best biblical parenting books I have read to date since becoming a parent. Definitely a resource I will come back to time and time again.

[Abbie · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent! Highly recommend to parents of younger children who want to specifically help their children apply God’s words to their lives!

[Danielle · Rating 5 out of 5]

So good! This ranks up there with Shepherding a Child's Heart. He breaks everything down and gives lots of examples. Loved it!

[Shelley Nutma · Rating 4 out of 5]

Overall this was what I expected it to be - a parenting book based solely on Biblical instruction. It was a good read and had very clear and valuable perspectives on discipline and teaching. The age group that it targets is around 7 years and older; I was reading this with my toddler in mind and so it wasn't always applicable. There were some points of view that I strongly disagreed with; (e.g.) his views on psychology are (in my opinion) close-minded and ignorant. But if you are looking for a traditional, biblical approach to parenting, then this book will suit you.
My favourite part is the Bible-study type questions you can follow through the book of Proverbs. This is at the very end of the book.

[Luke · Rating 5 out of 5]

As a new parent, I loved reading this. The core of Lou's message in the book stems from Deuteronomy 6:6-9, a biblical call for parents and heads of households to keep the Mosaic commandments, given by the Lord, and store them in their hearts, so that they may teach them diligently to their children. He takes this biblical idea and connects it with how to do that with Scriptural references. Namely, 2 Timothy 3:16-17 - that the Word of God is good for teaching, reproof (or conviction), for correction, for instruction in righteousness. The bottom line is - we as parents need to know the Word before we can ever hope to teach it.

[Darby Hughes · Rating 3 out of 5]

I’d say 3.5 stars if they let me. This is a simple, practical call for parents to use the Scriptures to teach their children and “bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.” This is a general overview of Biblical parenting with lots of helpful illustrations and suggestions.

Definitely convicting as Priolo describes all the ways and times Bible teaching can and should be done on a regular basis.

[Samuel Sadler · Rating 5 out of 5]

Priolo convicts and encourages in his call to raise children "in the nurture and admonition of the Lord." He provides a strong biblical argument for training children up according to scripture and provides a plethora of practical examples and tools for application. This book exudes the gospel as well, making clear that our task as parents (or anyone responsible for a child's spiritual growth) depends upon God's grace in our lives. This is the kind of book I will come back to frequently.

[Kristopher Schaal · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is probably the second-best book I have read on parenting (#1 is "Shepherding a Child's Heart," by Tedd Tripp). I appreciate Priolo's commitment to the sufficiency of Scripture as well as his pastoral carefulness. I would highly recommend this book, especially to parents who want to improve at communicating the Bible to their children.

[Bobby Bonser · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was good, but not the best I've read on child-rearing. Overall there were some great instructions, tips and thoughts on using scripture to support raising children. However, my main critique was that the gospel, and love of Christ as the main focus of the household was absent. Also, household devotions weren't really discussed at all.

[Sam Knecht · Rating 5 out of 5]

Extremely practical, this guidebook helps parents use all 4 of the “profitable” ends of Scripture in their parenting.

2 Timothy 3:16
“All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness.”

[Emma Posthuma · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was fantastic! An excellent resource for parents wanting to raise their children in the instruction of the Lord. I took a lot of notes, and have utilised all the practical resources found at the back of the book. This book will be my top recommendation for any new parents!

[Brad · Rating 4 out of 5]

The content may be a bit dated, but it is still a highly useful and practically written tool on using Scripture to teach. I thought this book was an excellent resource.

[Alicja · Rating 5 out of 5]

Practical and no nonsense. Brimming with scripture as well as clear and helpful examples and analogies. Resources provided at the end also exceptionally helpful as a quick reference guide.

[Laura · Rating 5 out of 5]

Super helpful book!

[Caitlin Brooks · Rating 4 out of 5]

A very practical book. Lots on details and scripture reference. The kind of book I needed to take notes on as I went.

[Victor Bolbot · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent book. Simple, but comprehensive and practical.

[Kadi Woods · Rating 1 out of 5]

I was not a big fan of this book. I got the principal but it was way theological for me. Just cut it to the nitty gritty.

[Alexis Paramore · Rating 4 out of 5]

I don’t agree with 100% of this book and the tone of the author wasn’t my favorite, however there is so much treasure and wisdom in here that it is well worth the read and re-read.

[Chad · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is more biblically-based than most Christian parenting books. It tells how to relate the Bible to the disciplinary process in practical ways. It's more of a framework than a guide to how to handle every situation that arises, which some parenting books try to do. It's written by a Christian counselor and instructor.

My wife and I first read this months ago, and have been working to follow it. We've frequently referenced Appendix A, a very useful long list of behaviors/conditions and the Bible verses that relate to them.

Notes
Teaching the Scriptures
Apply the Bible to life, by telling child how it applies to specific circumstances in your life and theirs. This makes it easier to understand, and makes a more lasting impression.

Convicting with the Scriptures
Children often don't realize the extent of their sin and how much they must change. You must use the Bible to show them.

Don't haphazardly dispense Bible verses ripped out of context while angry.

Child can't sincerely repent (change mind) until convicted of sin. Rev 3:19.

Use biblical terminology when convicting. It's more effective in helping children see need to change.

Show child how they have sinned against God, even if they also sinned against others.

Ask questions that appeal to child's conscience. Ask why child did what they did.

Sincerely praise and commend child for well-doing, so they don't only hear conviction from you.

Don't lose temper and harshly scold; become calm, speak in a natural tone, with careful words.

Correcting with the Scriptures
Explain to child from Bible, in specific concrete terms, what God requires if he's to repent. Luke 3:8-14.

Have child confess specifically to each wronged party.

Have child ask for forgiveness from each wronged party, not just say "I'm sorry." Asking for forgiveness leads to reconciliation.

Have child make restitution if necessary. Matt 5:23-24; 18:15-18; Jam 5:16.

Help child put off (stop) sin and put on (replace with) virtue. Eph 4:22-28.

Talk to child about thoughts and motives behind their words and actions.

Help child remove temptation from life (activities, situations, persons, etc.). Matt 5:29-30.

Non-habitual sins require conviction, and, to a lesser degree, correction, but you may sometimes overlook or cover with love a particular incident (Prov 19:11; 1 Pet 4:8). Habitual sins are those that most require correction.

Training with the Scriptures
When child says, "I don't want to do that," say, "That's OK. You don't have to want to. You just need to do it."

When training child as apprentice, show them Bible passages that tell what to put off and on. Tell how you've applied those passages in your life. Help them find ways to personally implement passages.

Train child to develop biblical thought patterns and motivations. Ask them to judge their thoughts and motives (Acts 5:1-4; 1 Cor 11:28-31; 2 Cor 13:5).

The Rod and Reproof
Before corporal punishment, ask child to identify their sin with specific, biblical terminology. Ask what they should have done instead.

Have child agree that they have violated God's law and must be disciplined. They may appeal to you if they disagree.

Before administering corporal punishment, be certain you have all the facts.

Don't discipline for selfish reasons, such as embarrassment or unfulfilled expectations, but for sin.

Only discipline when your anger is under control.

Proclaim the gospel as part of discipline (Jesus saves from sin).

Help child identify biblical alternatives to their bad behavior. Then, help them identify sinful desires (motives) and biblical alternatives.

After discipline, hold child, tell them you love them, and pray with them. Child should end comforted, happy, refreshed, secure with you.

Learning to Use Life's Instruction Manual
Go deeper than symptoms to underlying sinful attitude or character flaw.

Find relevant biblical commands.

Find relevant biblical principles (biblically-derived solutions).

Find examples of people in Bible who faced similar situations, and learn from them.

Appendix B: Questions that Help Bring Conviction
1. Do you know what God calls what you just did/said?
2. Do you realize that what you did is a sin? The Bible calls it X.
3. Can you think of a more gracious (or other appropriate biblical term) way to say (or respond) to that?
4. What exactly did you do? (instead of "Did you do that?")
5. What went through your mind when you did/said that?
6. What did you want (long for, crave) when you did/said that?
7. Are you more concerned about pleasing yourself or pleasing God?

[Elise · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book can feel overwhelming, but I feel I would have a much more difficult time of parenting if I didn't have this godly advice at my fingertips. The role of a Christian parent is a high calling-and I think Priolo does a great job at reminding parents that it is all a process of sanctification- for us before our children. We can't be diligent at teaching the scriptures if we don't know them. So he begins by addressing the parent.
He shows parents "how to relate the Bible to the disciplinary process in practical ways". Priolo is a counselor- but he teaches parents how to diagnose the thoughts and motives of your child "not in words taught by human wisdom but in those taught by the spirit...(I Cor 2:13)"
In his chapter on spanking he is careful to give Biblical guidelines without going further than the scriptures and becoming legalistic. I especially appreciate that he leaves all the "wisdom of this world" out of it.
Overall I think this is the best parenting book I have read because it teaches me how to search the scriptures and apply them rather than just giving me steps or formulas or advice. At the same time it is a very practical handbook that I can begin to apply right away. I have read other popular parenting books but I think this by far will be the most useful to me.

*Priolo's book, "The Heart of Anger" didn't hold much interest for me before I read this book. But I am finding it to be a good companion book. It seemed most appropriate for older children (than mine) and deals specifically with anger so I didn't pay too much attention to it before- but the list of 25 ways parents provoke their children to anger is really convicting. It is helping me to deal with my parenting sins!