Miss Thistlebottom's Hobgoblins: The Careful Writer's Guide to the Taboos, Bugbears and Outmoded Rules of English Usage

by Theodore M. Bernstein, Mark Singer (Introduction)

The old adage, rules are made to be broken has never been as well defended as in MISS THISTLEBOTTOM'S HOBGOBLINS. Throughout the book, Bernstein asserts that we have been indoctrinated with English usage rules that lack flexibility and evoke fear, confusion and frustration in writers. There are times when splitting an infinitive or ending a sentence with a preposition makes sense. Through a series of one-sided correspondences with Bertha Thistlebottom, an archetypal grade school English teacher, Bernstein addresses the community of rule mongering sticklers who have tried to squeeze the English language into a set of inflexible rules and outmoded definitions that only serve to stifle its growth and paralyze writers. In addition to his letters to Miss Thistlebottom, there are scores of entries where Bernstein debunks the rules of yesteryear with wit and intelligence and illustrates how to write effectively—without the worry of hobgoblins.

Genres: Reference, Writing, Nonfiction, Language, Business

260 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1971

Reviews

[Melissa · Rating 3 out of 5]

Miss Thistlebottom’s Hobgoblins was written (1971) before I was born. When I was in grad school (mid-1990s) for an English education degree, my professor would quote Bernstein at least once every class.

I can’t tell you why it took me so long to read this “classic” English usage book other than there are always more exciting FICTION (and even nonfiction) books to read, but Bernstein is engaging. How can he not be with a title like this? Miss Thistlebottom may well have been my 8th grade English teacher demanding correctness in “all right” written as two separate words along with “a lot.” “What we require is neither a language that is cramped nor a language gone wild” (xii).

Chapter titles are no less fun:

Witchcraft in Words (who doesn’t love alliteration? Rhetorical)

Syntax Scarecrows

Imps of Idioms

Spooks of Style

To the modern audience, Bernstein’s book likely will feel hidebound, but I found myself smiling at his creativity in explaining the taboos and bugbears of the English language.

[Jill Swanson-Diaz · Rating 4 out of 5]

If your a literary professional, writer or just a plain old grammar nerd, you'll enjoy this book of hobgoblins! It's full of interesting facts regarding the English language, laid out in a quirky and informational way. I enjoyed the author's way of speech and his ability to keep a reference guide entertaining. I definitely took away some great tools for my editing and writing in the future! That's the thing about the English language, there are always more tricks of the trade to tuck away into your arsenal! And most importantly, this book concentrates on getting back to the written word, instead of being stuck debating oppressive grammar rules.

[Jordy Leigh · Rating 3 out of 5]

Title: Miss Thistlebottom's Hobgoblins
Author: Theodore M. Bernstein
Publisher, year: Simon and Schuster, 1971
Format reviewed: Paperback
Page count: 260
Genre / category: Non-fiction, English usage guide

In Miss Thistlebottom's Hobgoblins, Bernstein addresses "taboos, bugbears, and outmoded rules of English usage." I haven’t read many other books on English usage (perhaps only The Chicago Manual of Style), and I believe this is the first that I’ve read from cover to cover. Therefore I can’t comment from experience on how it compares to other books of its kind. A note relevance, however: This book was written over 50 years ago, and its subject is one that evolves over time. It is not current. One of my highlights, however, is almost timeless—the discussion, starting on page 167, of modifiers and how they enhance or weaken prose.
Subject matter: Mixed, 3/5

Though the subject matter may lack novelty; the voice and style are original. The content is framed as a series of lightly satirical letters—each with a list of English use cases attached—addressed to the fictional character Miss Thistlebottom, "your eighth grade English teacher," who represents "the purists, the standpatters, the rigid traditionalist who brook little or no change." Although the stylegets points for originality, it was too cocky and barbed for my tastes. It also felt dense. It was easy enough to read alone in a quiet environment, but I read portions of it in a busy room and found myself needing to re-read sentences and paragraphs in order to register the point. This is in spite of what Bernstein wrote on page 151: "I happen to believe that newswriting, addressed to a reader who’s trying to absorb a maximum of information in a minimum of time, simplicity and swift comprehensibility are imperative. The best way to achieve this end, I believe, is to restrict each sentence to a single idea, avoiding a complication of clauses wherever it possible." Sound advice—and I believe it applies, not only to the news writer, but also to many kinds of writers. It is sound advice, here is more sound advice: do as he says, not as he does.
Voice and style: Weak, 2/5

Published when he was in his late 60's, Miss Thistlebottom's Hobgoblins was Bernstein's final major book published solely under his name, and it was followed by two collaborative titles. Prior to that, he wrote and had published four books on English usage, rose from being a copy editor at New York Times to being the assistant managing editor, and taught journalism and copy editing at the university level for twenty-five years. He writes with authority and confidence—perhaps too much confidence. On page 26, he makes the assessment regarding a particular use case of the word contact. "The objectors," he says, "are fighting a losing battle and may as well surrender." I may not like the voice and style of the book, but perhaps his impressive credentials and experience earned him the right to speak with authority, and fifty years have proved him right about contact (and many, if not most, of his assessments).
Authorial credibility and method: Outstanding, 5/5

This is a book about grammar; worldview doesn't have a whole lot of bearing on its content. Scripture passages were quoted, however. Bernstein quotes Psalm 23 ("The Lᴏʀᴅ is my shepherd") in the discussion about modifiers, and he calls it beautiful. Amen! He also discusses, on page 48, the corruptions of language that lead to helpmeet and helpmate, arising from the biblical account in which God created Eve and presented her to Adam. This isn't included for theology discussions, but I appreciate his recognition of the Bible as a text worth bringing into the discussion.
Worldview considerations: Strong, 4/5

My 1971 edition of the book features red and black text against a white wraparound cover. These elements—together with the thin red horizontal lines dividing the lines of subtitle text—clearly identify it as a book on language style and usage. The fonts likewise feel old style, formal, and traditional. Fitting. They are telling, not only of the subject matter, but also if it’s era. I will say that I’m not a fan of the all caps for the subtitle and author’s name, as well as for the titles of the other books that Bernstein has written. And perhaps what I'm about to mention was an intentional choice of style in a nod towards drafting and editing, but I’m not a fan of the left-aligned text, either. With regards to the interior formatting, I prefer when the first paragraph after heading has no indentation. This book does not adhere to that style. Significant pro, on the other hand: the margin sizes and white space of this edition hit the sweet spot for me.
Physical product: mixed, 3/5

It tickled the nerd in me to read and think about the inevitable evolution of language over the decades and centuries—and about what determines when colloquial language becomes formally accepted in writing. Bernstein posits that it is when good writers consistently employ the usage in question. Does that mean that when the first "good writers" (a subjective metric, to begin with) start employing it, they are employing yet unaccepted usage? But they are still good writers? Fascinating to think about. I can see myself referencing this book in the future to help me create character-specific tics in my fiction writing. We'll see whether or not I follow through on that idea. I don't think I’d ever reference it for help with my pros. Like I mentioned, this book is on outdated rules is now outdated.
Personal impact: Mixed, 3/5

Speaking primarily as a writer (by extension self editor), Miss Thistlebottom's Hobgoblins by Theodore M. Bernstein is limited in the practical help it can offer me. Nevertheless, there is still a readership for it. It shows a snapshot of some of the most interesting English use cases from fifty years ago, and thereby it has intrigue value to English language nerds. This is the readership to whom I would recommend it.

My final rating: 3.3 stars
⭐⭐⭐💫

Features included:
✔️Table of contents
✔️Appendix
✔️Index

[Craig Buck · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've been a fan of Miss Thistlebottom (and Mr. Bernstein) since 1972. I've given this book as a gift a half-dozen times over the years. I still reach for it every so often to settle a usage question. It is both invaluable, irrepressibly witty, and seemingly ageless. Before writing this review, I went back into the well-thumbed pages of this book to make sure it had not been left in the wake of the three and a half decades since it was written. It stands as relevant as ever. A must-have for anyone who relishes the English language and takes joy in its quirks.

[Christina · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was purchased for my writing library and will be used to refer to as needed. I like the fact that it's not your traditional writing style/grammar book but quirky and original.

[Keith Davis · Rating 5 out of 5]

A great book to give any grammar snob who is a stickler for unnecessary and useless rules that have outlived their usefulness, if they were ever useful in the first place.

[Regine · Rating 4 out of 5]

Entertaining. A sensible stance amidst linguistic flux. A pesky hobgoblin apparently interfered with the proofreading. Bierce's appended "Write It Right: A Little Blacklist of Literary Faults" captures 1909 with acerbic precision.

[Marcy · Rating 3 out of 5]

This seems like a “must read” for copyeditors. It’s funny, which helps it go down, but I recommend using it like a dictionary rather than trying to read it straight through. It’s pretty out-dated now though, and if you need a current usage book, go for Garner’s.

[Paul Sundberg · Rating 3 out of 5]

Dated but useful, and often witty.

[Student · Rating 4 out of 5]

An expertly written guide for English language experts looking to hone their English language expertise. Spoiler alert: Sometimes confusing