I had such hopes for you, Liddell! I mean, anyone who knows anything about the UFC has heard about how amazing your knockout power is, and how you pretty much dominated the sport for a while and had that crazy #deathstare and took no prisoners etc etc etc #legendary And you won me over with your childhood stories and those cute pictures of you in your Cubs outfits and all that talk about “just wanting to fight, I just want to scrap, I don’t care about the money, it’s about my passion, I’ll work for it until I die because I just love it so much”.
I was buying everything you were selling until you blew that crap wide open and basically stopped pretending to be a humble guy and started regaling me with how much money you were or weren’t making on every fight you had. Just because you preface every single statement with “it wasn’t about the money”, it doesn’t mean you’re not obviously preoccupied with money. My favourite was when he went into this long description of how it’s not about the money, but he made like, $125,000 just for showing up, and bought his mom a house, and bought HIMSELF a million dollar house, and bought a car, but it’s NOT ABOUT THE MONEY, GUYS. NOT AT ALL.
And my life, the PAINFUL recaps of EVERY. SINGLE. FIGHT he’s ever been in. Give me strength! This type of stuff is interesting WHEN YOU’RE ACTUALLY WINNING THE FIGHTS. There were way too many chapters (albeit short ones, but still, wasting my time here) basically saying “I wanted this fight, I got this fight, I didn’t listen to ANYTHING my coaches told me and so I lost this fight, I want to keep fighting though because I’m obvs the best” CHUCK PLZ. I honestly left this book impressed with how great OTHER fighters are – all Chuck can do is throw a great KO punch which is impressive, but I’m clearly of the new UFC generation who’s into that cross-disciplinary mixed martial art business. #givemeroryorgivemedeath I actually laughed out loud when Liddell claimed he had proved he was a master of all forms of MMA. Buddy, there’s like, thousands of strains, and also, you’re not. You can throw some punches and have decent cardio for a light heavyweight, BIG DEAL. Like, the fact that you have the record for most KO punches is a big deal, sure, but I want more diversity and please, get more of a personality. You’re boring. Reading about how much sex you have and money you make is such a yawn fest.
Finally, I hated the little inset boxes with random bits of information. Boring, unrelated, not interesting. You’re not quirky or cute, you’re entitled and trying too hard to make yourself personable. Just own the fact that you like punching people and that’s it. I’d like you a lot more in that case.
Was I entertained? No, but I did learn a heck of a lot more about UFC and big name fighters, including that I am NOT an Iceman fan (but #jokes that could change, I’m adaptable).