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Reflections
Nominated for the Goodreads M/M Romance Members Choice Award - 2011 Best Short Story
Dear Author,
I was looking through the 'cuddling' pictures of the NFSW picture thread and I kind of fell in love with this one.
To the untrained eye it seems like there isn't much going on, but to me I feel like there's something reflecting in this man's eyes, some unnamed emotion.
I feel like there's something he wants to tell me but he can't express it through words, I was thinking that maybe you can help me figure what he wants to say?
Or am I reading too much into this this pic? Am I seeing something that just isn't there?
Photo Description: A close-up photo of two shirtless men facing each other. On the right, one leans forward, head turned away from the viewer, his right arm behind the other's neck to cup his chin from the far side. The other looks at him with beseeching blue eyes, a forearm sideways against his chest.
This story was written as a part of the M/M Romance Group's "Hot Summer Days" event. Group members were asked to write a story prompt inspired by a photo of their choice. Authors of the group selected a photo and prompt that spoke to them and wrote a short story.
Read the story here or find it in Don't Read in the Closet, Volume 1.
__________
Genre: contemporary
Tags: gay m/m, male beauty, shyness, first love, hurt/comfort, disability, despair, love
Word Count: 4,713
EDIT Oct 2013: Okay, Reflections has been published for over two years, so it's now time to let you in on its secret. When I pondered how to do justice to the prompt, I decided at the same time to experiment, to challenge myself - to write my first short story with the omission of the two laziest words in an author's lexicon.
What do you normally say or write about something in present or past tense? Do you say it was? I bet you do, like all of us. Like Snoopy's It was a dark and stormy knight. (or was it night?) So I wrote Reflections by omitting those lazy words and mostly in present tense.
Was it hard? You bet IT WAS. Lol. (You don't believe me? Then YOU try writing just one page. Haha.) It took me five weeks to get it started and I admit I stuffed up the opening with some big and fanciful words while I tried to get the flow going. Finally, I submitted it - all 4500 words - three weeks and two extensions past original deadline.
So that is its secret and the reason why Reflections is like it is, like it or hate it.
One day I hope to extend Ben and Tony's tale, perhaps by filling in the time gaps caused by the panic filled, ever-nearing deadlines. Maybe you have some ideas you'd like to see. If so, please let me know. ~Justin
Dear Author,
I was looking through the 'cuddling' pictures of the NFSW picture thread and I kind of fell in love with this one.
To the untrained eye it seems like there isn't much going on, but to me I feel like there's something reflecting in this man's eyes, some unnamed emotion.
I feel like there's something he wants to tell me but he can't express it through words, I was thinking that maybe you can help me figure what he wants to say?
Or am I reading too much into this this pic? Am I seeing something that just isn't there?
Photo Description: A close-up photo of two shirtless men facing each other. On the right, one leans forward, head turned away from the viewer, his right arm behind the other's neck to cup his chin from the far side. The other looks at him with beseeching blue eyes, a forearm sideways against his chest.
This story was written as a part of the M/M Romance Group's "Hot Summer Days" event. Group members were asked to write a story prompt inspired by a photo of their choice. Authors of the group selected a photo and prompt that spoke to them and wrote a short story.
Read the story here or find it in Don't Read in the Closet, Volume 1.
__________
Genre: contemporary
Tags: gay m/m, male beauty, shyness, first love, hurt/comfort, disability, despair, love
Word Count: 4,713
EDIT Oct 2013: Okay, Reflections has been published for over two years, so it's now time to let you in on its secret. When I pondered how to do justice to the prompt, I decided at the same time to experiment, to challenge myself - to write my first short story with the omission of the two laziest words in an author's lexicon.
What do you normally say or write about something in present or past tense? Do you say it was? I bet you do, like all of us. Like Snoopy's It was a dark and stormy knight. (or was it night?) So I wrote Reflections by omitting those lazy words and mostly in present tense.
Was it hard? You bet IT WAS. Lol. (You don't believe me? Then YOU try writing just one page. Haha.) It took me five weeks to get it started and I admit I stuffed up the opening with some big and fanciful words while I tried to get the flow going. Finally, I submitted it - all 4500 words - three weeks and two extensions past original deadline.
So that is its secret and the reason why Reflections is like it is, like it or hate it.
One day I hope to extend Ben and Tony's tale, perhaps by filling in the time gaps caused by the panic filled, ever-nearing deadlines. Maybe you have some ideas you'd like to see. If so, please let me know. ~Justin
12 pages, ebook
First published July 9, 2011
1 person is currently reading
63 people want to read
About the author
Justin South
9 books124 followersProfessionally, I write articles for various accounts around the world. Recreationally, I write sexy gay YA and M/M romance stories, some with a degree of mystery/suspense or murder/suspense themes.
Over recent years I've counselled and assisted a large number of gay youths in Australia and some overseas. My contribution to the M/M Romance Group's video in support of the 'It Gets Better' project provides some detail, commencing at the 7 mins 55 secs mark here: http://www.goodreads.com/videos/15564...
Over recent years I've counselled and assisted a large number of gay youths in Australia and some overseas. My contribution to the M/M Romance Group's video in support of the 'It Gets Better' project provides some detail, commencing at the 7 mins 55 secs mark here: http://www.goodreads.com/videos/15564...
Ratings & Reviews
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews
June 2, 2012
This story was part of the M/M Romance Groups' Hot Summer Days Event. I love these projects because it matches an M/M writer with a photo and a reader request. To view the photo and request that inspired this story click on the link below (Warning photo depicts tasteful M/M situation):
http://www.goodreads.com/topic/show/5...
The photo is gorgeous. I couldn't wait to see where the author was going with it. I have to say, I did not like the writing style at all. Some felt it was poetic and beautiful, but I felt it was unwieldy with an overuse of adjectives. I am a literary major and I appreciate a deep vocabulary, but I just felt there were too many descriptive and bulky words in each sentence. I almost couldn't get through the first paragraph.
"As always, my mind surges in a rhapsody of shameless wicked love when I gaze at him. His beauty stuns my senses, a euphoric accord of orgasmic splendours. His eyes mesmerise me, their colours a miasma of delicate hues, of tropical blues and greens tinged with subtle ambers. His lips intrigue my desire, arouse my libido, ignite the furnace of my lustful mind. Who could resist his enchanting, sexy allure? Not me. Not as I glance at him across the aisle, avoiding him noticing my covert licentious curiosity, more so, my long held, rampant, frustrated infatuation."
I mean, I'm sorry. NOBODY talks like this. It made me immediately want to zone out. I think I had to read some paragraphs a couple of times because I started to think about other things.
I appreciated the plot, but the timelines jumped around a little too much for my taste and I was having trouble with the first person perspective and trying to figure out who the narrator was talking to. There were a couple of paragraphs of dialogue before it was mentioned he was talking to someone named Leo and then quite a few more paragraphs until the reader learns Leo is Tony's dad. It just didn't flow well. I know I"m in the minority of my other GoodReads friends, but I simply didn't care for this writing style at all. Sorry.
http://www.goodreads.com/topic/show/5...
The photo is gorgeous. I couldn't wait to see where the author was going with it. I have to say, I did not like the writing style at all. Some felt it was poetic and beautiful, but I felt it was unwieldy with an overuse of adjectives. I am a literary major and I appreciate a deep vocabulary, but I just felt there were too many descriptive and bulky words in each sentence. I almost couldn't get through the first paragraph.
"As always, my mind surges in a rhapsody of shameless wicked love when I gaze at him. His beauty stuns my senses, a euphoric accord of orgasmic splendours. His eyes mesmerise me, their colours a miasma of delicate hues, of tropical blues and greens tinged with subtle ambers. His lips intrigue my desire, arouse my libido, ignite the furnace of my lustful mind. Who could resist his enchanting, sexy allure? Not me. Not as I glance at him across the aisle, avoiding him noticing my covert licentious curiosity, more so, my long held, rampant, frustrated infatuation."
I mean, I'm sorry. NOBODY talks like this. It made me immediately want to zone out. I think I had to read some paragraphs a couple of times because I started to think about other things.
I appreciated the plot, but the timelines jumped around a little too much for my taste and I was having trouble with the first person perspective and trying to figure out who the narrator was talking to. There were a couple of paragraphs of dialogue before it was mentioned he was talking to someone named Leo and then quite a few more paragraphs until the reader learns Leo is Tony's dad. It just didn't flow well. I know I"m in the minority of my other GoodReads friends, but I simply didn't care for this writing style at all. Sorry.
December 30, 2016
1.5 stars!
OMG, what an amazing prompt picture! I immediately fell in love with it and I couldn’t wait to read the story going with it. Unfortunately, this story didn’t work out for me.
I’m not a native English speaker, but I normally don’t have problems to read and understand stories of any kind. The writing style in this one however felt extremely odd. I first thought that I might get used to it after the first few pages, but I didn’t. I think this is a clear case of overdoing. I had the feeling that the author wanted to use as many adjectives as possible and the main goal of the story was to make it sound poetical. But it felt artificial and not in a good way like in fairy tales.
The second problem were the big time jumps. I didn’t feel close yet to the characters and their dynamics and all of a sudden the story is moving many years into the future. I usually enjoy this kind of stories, but it just didn’t work out in this few pages.
I hate giving bad ratings, but there just wasn’t one single thing I liked about this one. The half star comes from the fact that this story was a free contribution to the Don’t Read in the Closet Event and I want to honor the author’s willingness to participate in this amazing event.
OMG, what an amazing prompt picture! I immediately fell in love with it and I couldn’t wait to read the story going with it. Unfortunately, this story didn’t work out for me.
I’m not a native English speaker, but I normally don’t have problems to read and understand stories of any kind. The writing style in this one however felt extremely odd. I first thought that I might get used to it after the first few pages, but I didn’t. I think this is a clear case of overdoing. I had the feeling that the author wanted to use as many adjectives as possible and the main goal of the story was to make it sound poetical. But it felt artificial and not in a good way like in fairy tales.
The second problem were the big time jumps. I didn’t feel close yet to the characters and their dynamics and all of a sudden the story is moving many years into the future. I usually enjoy this kind of stories, but it just didn’t work out in this few pages.
I hate giving bad ratings, but there just wasn’t one single thing I liked about this one. The half star comes from the fact that this story was a free contribution to the Don’t Read in the Closet Event and I want to honor the author’s willingness to participate in this amazing event.
October 10, 2013
I like this style of writing. I have two good friends who write like this and I like the poetry of it and the idea of what might happen. It leaves things up to your imagination but it is sexy too.
It is free too which is really nice of the writer.
It is free too which is really nice of the writer.
April 25, 2012
I am at a loss as to what to say about this. While I can say that I liked the story...... and I DID like it..... it seemed a bit unfinished. Don't get me wrong, things were explained in regards to the main aspects of the story but it seemed like details were left out (in important places) and there were too many details in others. It went from place to place quickly in the story without telling me (the reader) how it got there.
The writing was very beautiful but at times it seemed a bit much to me. I am all about good writing and descriptive content but this was a little too much in my opinion. Maybe I'm jaded because of the books I've been reading lately? Who knows?
Overall a good story. The ending surprised me a bit. I just wish I could have seen more in regards to how they got there.
The writing was very beautiful but at times it seemed a bit much to me. I am all about good writing and descriptive content but this was a little too much in my opinion. Maybe I'm jaded because of the books I've been reading lately? Who knows?
Overall a good story. The ending surprised me a bit. I just wish I could have seen more in regards to how they got there.
March 10, 2015
***Read as part of the free Don't Read in the Closet: Volume One anthology. Story #20***
Too much words for too little action. Description overload!
And who speaks like that? I mean...
"I'm glad the attractions of male admirer don't offend you."
"After all, to be stripped of all the tidbits of one's nefarious affairs and devious desires and to have the innate uniquness of one's body and mind laid bare on the first meeting, would tend to make subsequent liaisons less interesting, wouldn't you agree, mmmm?"
"Um, to the contrary, I think the romance of the affair, the love and cuddling and foreplay, and the intimacy and the sex would improve, on each occasion."
And these are just some scentenses on their first meeting.
With all the flowery descriptions and thoughts of Ben's longing for Tony, I really feared to be placed in the head of a dangerous stalker for a while.
July 31, 2011
I've never read anything so lyrical or simply beautiful in words alone! This definitely evokes strong emotions and paints vivid imagery as the story unfolds. I was waiting with baited breath to learn what could possibly be Tony's issue, one that would cause his father to be grateful to Ben for accepting him and one that would cause Ben to rage fury about the cruetly of life's knocks - and it felt like my breath was stolen when the significance of that issue became clear and tied everything together.
What a poignant story of love and finding one's soul mate! Beautifully done!!!
What a poignant story of love and finding one's soul mate! Beautifully done!!!
May 26, 2012
I have just read this short story in little over a half an hour, and I loved it. What Justin manages to convey and evoke in that short time is so very well done.The whole thing works beautifully with a tension, (Will they, won't they) threading its way through the narrative.Imagination and reflections of "what if" is so well written, I can't recommend it enough. So this will have to do.
Go read it everyone, it is an absolute gem. And Thank You to Justin for giving his story to us.
Go read it everyone, it is an absolute gem. And Thank You to Justin for giving his story to us.
October 15, 2011
I liked the story. It was a little slow in the beginning but quickly picked up pace. It was beautifully written even though I felt lost at places in the end it all made sense. I wish there would have been more of Tony and Ben getting to know each other but seeing them happily six years later was good
July 29, 2011
There were a lot of big words in the opening paragraphs but once I moved past these, the story was beautiful. It is a deep story and resonated for me because I work as a volunteer at Braille Institute each week and I wonder about the romantic lives of our young volunteers. A great read!
July 3, 2013
More poetic than anything. Not a style of writing that appeals to me. However it's free and many others have liked and loved it.
May 11, 2014
I just couldn't get past the overly flowery language in this story. Also the timeline jumps around and I found I was confused about when each part was supposed to take place.
January 12, 2017
** 2 passion juice stars **
..and you'll get that ^^ if you read this....uhm, confusing and "purple prose" short story.
Urban dictionary for "purple prose":
A term used to describe literature where the writing is unnecessarily flowery. it means that the writer described the situation (or wrote the entire book, passage, etc) using words that are too extravagant for the type of text, or any text at all. Basically, over-describing something. with stupid words.
THAT is an accurate description of this short story. It was so ridiculous that I laughed out loud several times, the rest of the times I was just confused.
So there's one star for the story (rubbish) and one bonus stars for ridiculous purple prose that made me laugh.
-----------------------------------------------
A short story in the collection "Don't Read in the Closet, Volume One" from the MM Romance Group Hot Summer Event 2011.
Click HERE for the story online or HERE to download the whole collection for your reading device.
Picture and prompt:
..and you'll get that ^^ if you read this....uhm, confusing and "purple prose" short story.
Urban dictionary for "purple prose":
A term used to describe literature where the writing is unnecessarily flowery. it means that the writer described the situation (or wrote the entire book, passage, etc) using words that are too extravagant for the type of text, or any text at all. Basically, over-describing something. with stupid words.
THAT is an accurate description of this short story. It was so ridiculous that I laughed out loud several times, the rest of the times I was just confused.
So there's one star for the story (rubbish) and one bonus stars for ridiculous purple prose that made me laugh.
--------------------------
"How I wish to discover the splendours of his torso. To finger and lip and lick his strong defined chest and nipples, those tent poles under his body-fitting polo-necks he now wears (...) And to sink the implements of my quest into the valleys of his abs, and rub and doodle them over their muscly plateaus."
--------------------------
Nipple tent poles for you there... and implements of quest = fingers and lips? Muscly plateaus...
--------------------------
"How I long my teeth to grip the waistband and rip the elastic to his ankles, to bathe my face in the aromas of his manliness, burying my nose in the huskiness of his pubic playground, and taste the delectable flavours of his virility."
--------------------------
How I long my teeth... ehhh... Whut?
Sorry, this does nothing for my pubic playground.
So, the MC walks in to a coffee shop and envision his love interest and himself having a romp...in the display...
-------------------------
"To twist and roll and clench our naked bodies in arousing passion over the open tops, spraying beans and cheeses and oils and vinegars about in ecstatic disarray. To slide to the floor on cascades of overturned bags, blending them as we grind and crunch and hump our pelvises and bellies and chests and lips. To writhe and trash and squirm our oil glistened, bean streaked bodies in torrid streaming, slimy, aromatic fervour, our sweaty moaning excitement brewing our desire, our hot cream erupting in contented satiable bliss."
-------------------------
Rolling around in the food and coffee display? Spraying beans and cheeses and oils and vinegars about in ecstatic disarray... Sorry for ruining your lunch and coffee run at the corner shop.
...slimy, aromatic fervour... Slimy? SLIMY??
...our hot cream erupting in contented bliss... Do you want some cream with that coffee? No? Sure?
----------------------
My dazed eyeballs lock to his...
----------------------
Eye-eyeballs?
----------------------
I dart to his eyes, those orbs of bittersweet expressions, gazing into pale oceanic tranquility, noticing the minute artistery of his sensual eyelids, guarded by cute black lashes, and the stunning natural grooming of his brows.
----------------------
I--I.... I don't even have words...
----------------------
"Mmmm, you excite me. Perhaps we should find out."
"What? To discover if each intimate liaison improves or if I am a sexual demon?"
----------------------
Have you had intimate liaison recently?
Meh!
I'm more of a call-a-spade-a-spade kind of girl, or rather call-a-cock-a-cock, not his hardening rod of over-stretched excitement OR a rampant upright weapon of sexual intent.
"How I wish to discover the splendours of his torso. To finger and lip and lick his strong defined chest and nipples, those tent poles under his body-fitting polo-necks he now wears (...) And to sink the implements of my quest into the valleys of his abs, and rub and doodle them over their muscly plateaus."
--------------------------
Nipple tent poles for you there... and implements of quest = fingers and lips? Muscly plateaus...
--------------------------
"How I long my teeth to grip the waistband and rip the elastic to his ankles, to bathe my face in the aromas of his manliness, burying my nose in the huskiness of his pubic playground, and taste the delectable flavours of his virility."
--------------------------
How I long my teeth... ehhh... Whut?
Sorry, this does nothing for my pubic playground.
So, the MC walks in to a coffee shop and envision his love interest and himself having a romp...in the display...
-------------------------
"To twist and roll and clench our naked bodies in arousing passion over the open tops, spraying beans and cheeses and oils and vinegars about in ecstatic disarray. To slide to the floor on cascades of overturned bags, blending them as we grind and crunch and hump our pelvises and bellies and chests and lips. To writhe and trash and squirm our oil glistened, bean streaked bodies in torrid streaming, slimy, aromatic fervour, our sweaty moaning excitement brewing our desire, our hot cream erupting in contented satiable bliss."
-------------------------
Rolling around in the food and coffee display? Spraying beans and cheeses and oils and vinegars about in ecstatic disarray... Sorry for ruining your lunch and coffee run at the corner shop.
...slimy, aromatic fervour... Slimy? SLIMY??
...our hot cream erupting in contented bliss... Do you want some cream with that coffee? No? Sure?
----------------------
My dazed eyeballs lock to his...
----------------------
Eye-eyeballs?
----------------------
I dart to his eyes, those orbs of bittersweet expressions, gazing into pale oceanic tranquility, noticing the minute artistery of his sensual eyelids, guarded by cute black lashes, and the stunning natural grooming of his brows.
----------------------
I--I.... I don't even have words...
----------------------
"Mmmm, you excite me. Perhaps we should find out."
"What? To discover if each intimate liaison improves or if I am a sexual demon?"
----------------------
Have you had intimate liaison recently?
Meh!
I'm more of a call-a-spade-a-spade kind of girl, or rather call-a-cock-a-cock, not his hardening rod of over-stretched excitement OR a rampant upright weapon of sexual intent.
-----------------------------------------------
A short story in the collection "Don't Read in the Closet, Volume One" from the MM Romance Group Hot Summer Event 2011.
Click HERE for the story online or HERE to download the whole collection for your reading device.
Picture and prompt:
August 1, 2020
This wasn't to my taste. I liked the characters of Leo, Tony, and Ben. The prose was more purple thatn I usually read, or maybe too much thesaurus. I had a heard time getting to the story with so many words in the way.
October 1, 2016
Poetically erotic. Beautifully written.
August 4, 2011
Justin South literally brought me along on Ben's journey as he fell in love with Tony. The beginning of this story reads as true poetry and the pure desire flowing off the page is tangible. The prose is stunning and the flow is perfect. Ben's love for Tony starts as purely physical but transcends into something we all wish for which is all-encompassing. There is a heart-stopping moment when the reader fears they will be snatched away from each other. While the problem they face together is serious, it in no way alters their journey together. Absolutely incredible read!
June 13, 2012
Ack!! How do I rate this?! The way this story is written is beautiful and confusing. I honestly has no idea what was going on until the second to last sentence, and im not kidding. Once I figured out what was going on it all just came together. Really sweet story. If all the stuff going on in this story was plainly stated I don't think it would have impacted me as much once I realized what was going on. I'm going have to reread this and maybe knowing how it ends will help piece all together.
Want to read
July 7, 2012
Offered for FREE from the M/M Romance Group, Hot Summer Days event.
April 26, 2016
Don't Read in the Closet: Volume One
2.5 stars due to writing style not editing
My Rating System:
* couldn't finish, ** wouldn't recommend, *** would recommend, **** would read again, ***** have read again.
2.5 stars due to writing style not editing
My Rating System:
* couldn't finish, ** wouldn't recommend, *** would recommend, **** would read again, ***** have read again.
July 19, 2011
This isn't your normal gay story. It's written more like a poem. I love poetry, it's something I write myself it isn't for everyone. Poetry is like looking at art, when it fits, it pulls and draws you in. When it doesn't fit, you don't get it. I personally got it and loved it. Thank You.
July 28, 2011
I really liked the contrast of Ben's poetic, almost luscious descriptions of all that he sees to bare harshness Tony's diagnosis of RP. It highlighted the richness of the gift of sight when faced with sight's total absence. Thank you for this thoughtful story.
July 24, 2011
3.5 stars
This was a very unique story in the way it was written with beautiful, poetic language. However, I also felt that I didn't get to know the characters as well as I wanted to.
This was a very unique story in the way it was written with beautiful, poetic language. However, I also felt that I didn't get to know the characters as well as I wanted to.
July 19, 2011
A very lyrical and unique story, much like the men whose love story very sweetly gently flows amongst the prose.
Thank you Justin, for sharing it. :)
Thank you Justin, for sharing it. :)
August 9, 2011
3.5 stars
A very poetic piece that doesn't go along with the same style most stories travel. Kind of old school, in that sense, but beautifully done.
A very poetic piece that doesn't go along with the same style most stories travel. Kind of old school, in that sense, but beautifully done.
September 11, 2016
3.5 stars
July 13, 2012
Really loved this. So lyrical and eloquent. A very sweet story about love.
June 4, 2014
I kept waiting for the punchline to see why they couldn't be together. The writing was great, but the plot a little lacking.
November 19, 2014
If I hadn't picked up on some modern words I'd have thought this was written in the 1700's.
It was incredibly poetic but I found it difficult to figure out what was going on most the time.
It was incredibly poetic but I found it difficult to figure out what was going on most the time.
December 12, 2014
The story is written in a way that doesn't connect with me. It is poetic but sadly not emotional. At least not for me.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 30 reviews