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Alison Wonderland
After Alison Temple discovers that her husband is cheating on her, she does what any jilted woman would she spray-paints a nasty message for him on her wedding dress and takes a job with the detective firm that found him out. Being a detective at the all-female Fitzgerald's Bureau of Investigation in London is certainly a change of pace from her previous life, especially considering the characters Alison meets in the line of duty. There's her boss, the estimable Mrs. Fitzgerald; Taron, Alison's eccentric best friend, who claims her mother is a witch; Jeff, her love-struck, poetry-writing neighbor; and -- last but not least! -- her psychic postman. Together, their idiosyncrasies and their demands on Alison threaten to drive her mad...if she didn't need and love them all so much. Clever, quirky, and infused with just a hint of magic, Alison Wonderland is a literary novel about a memorable heroine coping with the everyday complexities of modern life.Free to borrow with Kindle Unlimited or Amazon Prime.
201 pages, Kindle Edition
First published March 18, 1999
135 people are currently reading
1662 people want to read
About the author
Helen Smith
22 books275 followersSign up for Helen Smith's Book News and receive a FREE Kindle copy of one of Helen Smith's books: http://helensmithbooks.com/freebook
Helen Smith is a member of the Mystery Writers of America, The Crime Writers Association and English PEN. She traveled the world when her daughter was small, doing all sorts of strange jobs to support them both – from cleaning motels to working as a magician's assistant – before returning to live in London where she wrote her first novel. She's the author of Alison Wonderland, Being Light, The Miracle Inspector and the Emily Castles mystery series as well as children's books, poetry and plays.
Helen Smith's books have reached number one on Amazon's bestseller lists in the US, UK, Canada and Germany. Her first book, Alison Wonderland, was one of Amazon Publishing's top five bestselling books when it was launched in the US in 2011. In July 2013, following the publication of Invitation to Die, Helen Smith reached the top spot as "America's most popular mystery author" on Amazon. Her books have been praised in The Times, The Times Literary Supplement, the Guardian, Time Out and Wired.com. They have appeared on "best books of the year" lists in For Books' Sake, The Cult Den, The Independent and the Guardian.
Helen Smith has been invited to read at literary events and festivals in London and New York and points in between – including, most recently, a cruise ship en route to California via the Suez Canal. Her work has been read or performed at the National Theatre, The Royal Festival Hall, the Victoria and Albert Museum of Childhood, Amnesty International’s Headquarters, The Edinburgh Festival and The University of London. She’s a Literary Death Match champion and the recipient of an Arts Council of England award. Her work has been optioned by the BBC. She’s amazing! Please buy her books.
"Smith is gin-and-tonic funny." Booklist
Helen Smith is a member of the Mystery Writers of America, The Crime Writers Association and English PEN. She traveled the world when her daughter was small, doing all sorts of strange jobs to support them both – from cleaning motels to working as a magician's assistant – before returning to live in London where she wrote her first novel. She's the author of Alison Wonderland, Being Light, The Miracle Inspector and the Emily Castles mystery series as well as children's books, poetry and plays.
Helen Smith's books have reached number one on Amazon's bestseller lists in the US, UK, Canada and Germany. Her first book, Alison Wonderland, was one of Amazon Publishing's top five bestselling books when it was launched in the US in 2011. In July 2013, following the publication of Invitation to Die, Helen Smith reached the top spot as "America's most popular mystery author" on Amazon. Her books have been praised in The Times, The Times Literary Supplement, the Guardian, Time Out and Wired.com. They have appeared on "best books of the year" lists in For Books' Sake, The Cult Den, The Independent and the Guardian.
Helen Smith has been invited to read at literary events and festivals in London and New York and points in between – including, most recently, a cruise ship en route to California via the Suez Canal. Her work has been read or performed at the National Theatre, The Royal Festival Hall, the Victoria and Albert Museum of Childhood, Amnesty International’s Headquarters, The Edinburgh Festival and The University of London. She’s a Literary Death Match champion and the recipient of an Arts Council of England award. Her work has been optioned by the BBC. She’s amazing! Please buy her books.
"Smith is gin-and-tonic funny." Booklist
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 314 reviews
December 4, 2013
I'd seen the ads on Goodreads for Helen Smith's Alison Wonderland, and the premise sounded intriguing: A woman goes to work for a private investigation agency after her divorce. So when it popped up as the Kindle deal of the day, it was a no-brainer that I'd pick it up. Plus, it has a great cover, and I'm a sucker for great covers.
Unfortunately, between that and the great opening line, that's where this book hit its peak.
The rest appears to be a cobbled-together experiment of rapidly switching POVs attempting to pass off as quirky. Alison finds herself drawn into some bizarro world of hidden genetic experimentation, but everyone involved is such a bumbling idiot it's surprising anything ever succeeded. Each new plot twist tries to one-up the previous for shock value until the (and I'm going to spoil here, but I'm begging you not to read this book, so really, you'll thank me later) moment when Alison and her stoner friend/client Taron stumble upon a man having sex with the giant sheep/pig he's caretaker for while standing on a ladder over a giant painting of a naked man on a hillside.
Yes, Smith went there. No, I can't unsee that. And now, neither can you. Sorry about that.
At some point, I probably should have quit reading Alison Wonderland. In hindsight (horrible pun after that last scene, I'll admit), I wish I had, but I kept hoping that the conclusion would tie it all together in some spectacular way that would make sense, and I would be struck by the brilliance -- that all the seeming nonsense would be a stunning act of literary wonder.
Instead, it was more nonsense, and if this was a paper book, and not a Kindle book on my iPad, I'd have Dorothy Parkered it, and thrown it with great force.
I remain convinced that every review here on Goodreads that gave it anything over one star was given by someone who read it and thinks that they must have missed the brilliance, and by giving it anything less than the rating they did, they were somehow admitting ignorance. Instead, I'm going to be the one person at the parade who's going to stand up and say it: The emperor is wearing no clothes.
Unfortunately, between that and the great opening line, that's where this book hit its peak.
The rest appears to be a cobbled-together experiment of rapidly switching POVs attempting to pass off as quirky. Alison finds herself drawn into some bizarro world of hidden genetic experimentation, but everyone involved is such a bumbling idiot it's surprising anything ever succeeded. Each new plot twist tries to one-up the previous for shock value until the (and I'm going to spoil here, but I'm begging you not to read this book, so really, you'll thank me later) moment when Alison and her stoner friend/client Taron stumble upon a man having sex with the giant sheep/pig he's caretaker for while standing on a ladder over a giant painting of a naked man on a hillside.
Yes, Smith went there. No, I can't unsee that. And now, neither can you. Sorry about that.
At some point, I probably should have quit reading Alison Wonderland. In hindsight (horrible pun after that last scene, I'll admit), I wish I had, but I kept hoping that the conclusion would tie it all together in some spectacular way that would make sense, and I would be struck by the brilliance -- that all the seeming nonsense would be a stunning act of literary wonder.
Instead, it was more nonsense, and if this was a paper book, and not a Kindle book on my iPad, I'd have Dorothy Parkered it, and thrown it with great force.
I remain convinced that every review here on Goodreads that gave it anything over one star was given by someone who read it and thinks that they must have missed the brilliance, and by giving it anything less than the rating they did, they were somehow admitting ignorance. Instead, I'm going to be the one person at the parade who's going to stand up and say it: The emperor is wearing no clothes.
March 24, 2012
The first thing I noticed about Alison Wonderland was the contradictory reviews on Amazon.
Now, I made sure not to read the actual reviews, a very bad practice for reviewers in my opinion. (I am big on opinions, I know.) I did, however, notice the Star Ratings. Fours, twos, fives, threes... it was odd. Having corresponded through email with Helen Smith, I knew her to be articulate and very interesting so I was confused with the ratings I saw.
So I began to read. And read, read some more, remember I missed dinner, and read while I ate dinner. I was delighted! Helen Smith's writing style is enchanting in it's vibrant colors, neurotic characters and flamboyant plot-lines. It's like listening to that wonderful friend, the one who travels all over the world; wears bohemian mixed with designer clothing; has friends with yachts and still can't wait to regale you with her stories, talking non-stop into the night with bottles of wine piling up on your coffee table.
I can see where some would get confused if they tried to take the characters too literally and too seriously. Helen Smith is very clever in that she weaves many "Easter Eggs" into most aspects of the story. It's like falling into the rabbit hole and discovering brilliant people who aren't quit what you expect and scenes filled with double-entandre. I loved every minute of it.
Please do not misunderstand me, this is not a bizarro read in which nothing makes sense and you have to re-read every chapter to get it. In fact, it flowed for me and I became lost in the story. In fact, the story is very straight forward. (Smiles)
Alison Temple has hired an all woman investigative company. She wants to confirm that her husband is not cheating on her. She eventually becomes an investigator at that very office. Once she has become experienced her boss sets her on a very secret assignment and the adventure begins.
You will love her friend Taron who is just plain nuts and lovely. Her neighbor Jeff, who is madly in love with her, is an inventor of crazy but useful things. The relationships are refreshing and funny and believable.
This is a smart story. Fantastical and fun. A decadent read that I loved and strongly recommend to contemporary, urban fantasy, mystery and the curious! Just kick off your shoes, lay back and open your mind, then open the book.....
Here is the Summary from GoodReads but I warn you, it doesn't do it justice. When Alison joins Mrs Fitzgeralds Bureau of Investigation as a private detective, her new job takes her on a series of loosely linked adventures involving an abandoned baby, a transgenic animal and secret tunnels under The Thames. She travels from London to the seaside town of Weymouth and back again with her new best friend Taron, a girl with a hundred candle smile. But someone is betraying her. Is it Taron? Is it Jeff, the sweet-natured inventor who writes her poetry? Or are there darker forces at play? 'Only occasionally does a piece of fiction leap out and demand immediate cult status. Alison Wonderland is one.' The Times
September 12, 2011
The first thing that I thought upon completing this book was, "Wow. What a piece of crap."
I read all 220 pages of this book (which I obtained because it was the Kindle deal of the day) hoping that things would get better. I thought, as the book began, that it was building slowly to the plot. One third of the way into the book, I realized that I was still waiting for some semblance of plot to build, and that this was most likely going to be a problem. It was-- after finishing the book, I can tell you basic things about the characters, but nothing about a real, tangible plot.
As the book regularly shifts perspective between characters (without a change in narrative voice), the lack of plot is particularly frustrating. With so many opportunities to have something worthwhile expressed from a bunch of different perspectives, there's really no point at all to the book, save for the author's attempts to be clever or to impress the audience via shock value. The only surprise that this book offers is how incredibly poorly it is written. Entire chapters of the book contribute nothing whatsoever to the book (I would say "to the plot," but, again, there isn't one).
The best characters in the book are Mrs. Fitzgerald and Dick, both of whom get brief narrative pieces written in third-person limited (albeit a flawed version of it), while the utterly unlikable title character gets passages written in first person. None of the third-person bits are distinguishable from one another, and it's not as thought the author is trying to be particularly deep and tell us that we're all just reflections of the same consciousness-- she just really doesn't seem to be able to do characterization very well.
What this ultimately amounts to is a book about a woman who becomes a private investigator but does no actual detective work, but instead goes on holiday and does a lot of drugs with someone that she doesn't really care for. There's no Wonderland in sight-- and while the author warns that the character's name is the only "Alice in Wonderland" reference in the book, we go through the novel expecting her to fall into some kind of rabbit hole, because we realize by the halfway point that it's the only thing that would possibly save this novel. It never happens.
Perhaps if the author had had an editor, the book wouldn't be a miserable waste of time. There are comma splices, missing commas, possessive words missing an apostrophe, and words that are missing completely. The grammar issue is the first clue that the book was either a) never edited, b) edited by someone who has no business editing, and that c) either Smith doesn't know the rules of grammar and can't fix her proofs or d) never bothered to look them over in the first place.
I would like my dollar back.
I read all 220 pages of this book (which I obtained because it was the Kindle deal of the day) hoping that things would get better. I thought, as the book began, that it was building slowly to the plot. One third of the way into the book, I realized that I was still waiting for some semblance of plot to build, and that this was most likely going to be a problem. It was-- after finishing the book, I can tell you basic things about the characters, but nothing about a real, tangible plot.
As the book regularly shifts perspective between characters (without a change in narrative voice), the lack of plot is particularly frustrating. With so many opportunities to have something worthwhile expressed from a bunch of different perspectives, there's really no point at all to the book, save for the author's attempts to be clever or to impress the audience via shock value. The only surprise that this book offers is how incredibly poorly it is written. Entire chapters of the book contribute nothing whatsoever to the book (I would say "to the plot," but, again, there isn't one).
The best characters in the book are Mrs. Fitzgerald and Dick, both of whom get brief narrative pieces written in third-person limited (albeit a flawed version of it), while the utterly unlikable title character gets passages written in first person. None of the third-person bits are distinguishable from one another, and it's not as thought the author is trying to be particularly deep and tell us that we're all just reflections of the same consciousness-- she just really doesn't seem to be able to do characterization very well.
What this ultimately amounts to is a book about a woman who becomes a private investigator but does no actual detective work, but instead goes on holiday and does a lot of drugs with someone that she doesn't really care for. There's no Wonderland in sight-- and while the author warns that the character's name is the only "Alice in Wonderland" reference in the book, we go through the novel expecting her to fall into some kind of rabbit hole, because we realize by the halfway point that it's the only thing that would possibly save this novel. It never happens.
Perhaps if the author had had an editor, the book wouldn't be a miserable waste of time. There are comma splices, missing commas, possessive words missing an apostrophe, and words that are missing completely. The grammar issue is the first clue that the book was either a) never edited, b) edited by someone who has no business editing, and that c) either Smith doesn't know the rules of grammar and can't fix her proofs or d) never bothered to look them over in the first place.
I would like my dollar back.
December 4, 2013
Loved it. Having lived in England for about 20 years, this book was especially entertaining with lots of references to things/places I really miss–like Marks and Spencers!
My review for Amazon:
Modern Wonderland
You had me at "I'm waiting for Mr. Wonderland and when I find him I'll get married. Until, then I'm staying single." And you kept me captivated right to the end-the poignant parting words will stay with me.
I can't rave about this book enough. The Author, Helen Smith, takes us on a wondrous journey into the life of Alison Temple, a private detective based in London. Her writing is sharp and witty, her ideas totally original. All the characters in this story are interesting and peculiar in their own ways. I won't say a lot about Taron, only that you will instantly fall in love with her. I can't wait to read more from this brilliant Author.
My review for Amazon:
Modern Wonderland
You had me at "I'm waiting for Mr. Wonderland and when I find him I'll get married. Until, then I'm staying single." And you kept me captivated right to the end-the poignant parting words will stay with me.
I can't rave about this book enough. The Author, Helen Smith, takes us on a wondrous journey into the life of Alison Temple, a private detective based in London. Her writing is sharp and witty, her ideas totally original. All the characters in this story are interesting and peculiar in their own ways. I won't say a lot about Taron, only that you will instantly fall in love with her. I can't wait to read more from this brilliant Author.
July 9, 2015
Alison Wonderland is one of those books I'd had knocking around the back of my mind for quite a while, without knowing exactly where I had heard about it or even what I'd heard about it. I'd filed it away in a vague category entitled 'I read something good about this on a blog' - of course, I can't remember what the blog was or what the 'something good' was. Having first heard about it a couple of years ago, I'd assumed it was a relatively recent release, but once I started reading, it didn't take me long to start thinking it was such a quintessentially 90s British story that it had to have been written earlier. Sure enough, I soon found it was originally published in 1999 (although Amazon gives the publication date as 2011, which is presumably when it was reissued and enjoyed the small resurgence in popularity that allowed me to notice it).
Trying to establish the characteristics of this 90s-British-fiction quality, I came up with the following:
- Plotless stories within a really quite fluffy book. I think I notice this because you don't really find it now: 'light' books are almost always plot-led genre fiction - thrillers, crime, romance, etc, or at least they are presented as fitting into one of those categories. This is definitely not a literary novel, but what is it? The mystery isn't really a mystery, and turns out to be a red herring, ultimately seeming kind of parodic. The romantic subplot, which initially appears to be a foregone conclusion, is left completely open with no satisfying resolution (or even anything resembling an ending) for either party.
- Characters living in London while either unemployed or doing jobs that are hardly jobs at all, with no reference made to how they're affording it.
- The 'randomness'. Taron is a dippy, flaky character who jumps between various faiths/beliefs, claims her mother is a witch and makes up outlandish stories about her past. Alison and Jeff's relationship revolves around a) him writing her quirky poems and b) each of them sending the other newspaper clippings of obscure and ridiculous stories. Even the postman is psychic. I know cute, whimsical stuff is still in vogue at the moment, but this randomness has a slightly harder, darker quality to it. Partly because of:
- Loads of casual references to drugs - and talk of 'clubbing', which now seems like a generally outdated concept. (At one point Alison goes to a 'singles bar'.)
- Mentions of music, TV shows and shops that date the story very specifically (okay, I'm sure this isn't specific to books from the 90s, but that sort of namedropping in this sort of fiction seems to have started in the 90s).
I've made the comparison before, but this really did remind me of early Scarlett Thomas. Like Thomas's Lily Pascale, Alison Temple is an investigator... of sorts, pursuing a mystery, of sorts, except she doesn't really know what it is, and the story ends up being more about her friend Taron's efforts to find an abandoned baby (not a specific one, just any abandoned baby. Don't ask). Maybe this isn't so much a 90s thing as something specific to a handful of books (and perhaps an indication of an underdeveloped style?), but another reaction I had to both this and the Lily Pascale books was that the stories feel like they're taking place in a self-contained, not-quite-real universe. Nothing really seems to have any consequences. When Alison and Taron actually do find an abandoned baby, the idea that it arrived 'by magic' isn't quite given enough credence to be taken seriously, but nor is there any question of establishing where the baby really came from. It's simply accepted into their lives (with no suggestion of any potential legal issues, or indeed financial ones).
I enjoyed this, but I have to steal the term David used in his review and say it's an oddity, one I'm hesitant to recommend. It was perfect as a quick, light, endearingly strange break in between reading bits of academic texts, but I'm not sure I would have liked it that much in another context. Although it did lead me to discover 'You'll Never Know' by Hi-Gloss, which I've been listening to lots ever since.
Trying to establish the characteristics of this 90s-British-fiction quality, I came up with the following:
- Plotless stories within a really quite fluffy book. I think I notice this because you don't really find it now: 'light' books are almost always plot-led genre fiction - thrillers, crime, romance, etc, or at least they are presented as fitting into one of those categories. This is definitely not a literary novel, but what is it? The mystery isn't really a mystery, and turns out to be a red herring, ultimately seeming kind of parodic. The romantic subplot, which initially appears to be a foregone conclusion, is left completely open with no satisfying resolution (or even anything resembling an ending) for either party.
- Characters living in London while either unemployed or doing jobs that are hardly jobs at all, with no reference made to how they're affording it.
- The 'randomness'. Taron is a dippy, flaky character who jumps between various faiths/beliefs, claims her mother is a witch and makes up outlandish stories about her past. Alison and Jeff's relationship revolves around a) him writing her quirky poems and b) each of them sending the other newspaper clippings of obscure and ridiculous stories. Even the postman is psychic. I know cute, whimsical stuff is still in vogue at the moment, but this randomness has a slightly harder, darker quality to it. Partly because of:
- Loads of casual references to drugs - and talk of 'clubbing', which now seems like a generally outdated concept. (At one point Alison goes to a 'singles bar'.)
- Mentions of music, TV shows and shops that date the story very specifically (okay, I'm sure this isn't specific to books from the 90s, but that sort of namedropping in this sort of fiction seems to have started in the 90s).
I've made the comparison before, but this really did remind me of early Scarlett Thomas. Like Thomas's Lily Pascale, Alison Temple is an investigator... of sorts, pursuing a mystery, of sorts, except she doesn't really know what it is, and the story ends up being more about her friend Taron's efforts to find an abandoned baby (not a specific one, just any abandoned baby. Don't ask). Maybe this isn't so much a 90s thing as something specific to a handful of books (and perhaps an indication of an underdeveloped style?), but another reaction I had to both this and the Lily Pascale books was that the stories feel like they're taking place in a self-contained, not-quite-real universe. Nothing really seems to have any consequences. When Alison and Taron actually do find an abandoned baby, the idea that it arrived 'by magic' isn't quite given enough credence to be taken seriously, but nor is there any question of establishing where the baby really came from. It's simply accepted into their lives (with no suggestion of any potential legal issues, or indeed financial ones).
I enjoyed this, but I have to steal the term David used in his review and say it's an oddity, one I'm hesitant to recommend. It was perfect as a quick, light, endearingly strange break in between reading bits of academic texts, but I'm not sure I would have liked it that much in another context. Although it did lead me to discover 'You'll Never Know' by Hi-Gloss, which I've been listening to lots ever since.
March 4, 2012
The best thing about this book was the four blank pages at the end.
I needed to make a note of something and luckily had this book on hand.
Meanwhile, the book itself was… urgh.
The premise sounded quite fun: girl suspects husband is cheating, girl hires all female detective agency to investigate him, girl finds out he’s cheating, leaves him, and joins said all female detective agency. Should be a good story, right?
WRONG!!!!
Shifting POV, shifting tenses, insane characters that inspire flight rather than interest, absolutely no plot, and just the worst of smug existentialism that got cliché decades ago.
Such a disappointment.
Who allowed this hot mess to hit the presses?
I needed to make a note of something and luckily had this book on hand.
Meanwhile, the book itself was… urgh.
The premise sounded quite fun: girl suspects husband is cheating, girl hires all female detective agency to investigate him, girl finds out he’s cheating, leaves him, and joins said all female detective agency. Should be a good story, right?
WRONG!!!!
Shifting POV, shifting tenses, insane characters that inspire flight rather than interest, absolutely no plot, and just the worst of smug existentialism that got cliché decades ago.
Such a disappointment.
Who allowed this hot mess to hit the presses?
December 4, 2013
Alison Wonderland is a delightfully quirky, character-driven odyssey. Underlying the seamless prose is Smith's wit and insightful observation of human nature. An absolute joy to read.
The literary fiction I've read (or at least attempted to read) in the past has always been hard work. In Alison Wonderland, it’s Smith’s words that do all the work. All the reader need do is sit back and enjoy the journey.
I urge others, who like me are wary of anything labelled “literary fiction,” to take a chance on this book. I promise you won’t be disappointed.
The literary fiction I've read (or at least attempted to read) in the past has always been hard work. In Alison Wonderland, it’s Smith’s words that do all the work. All the reader need do is sit back and enjoy the journey.
I urge others, who like me are wary of anything labelled “literary fiction,” to take a chance on this book. I promise you won’t be disappointed.
July 29, 2011
2.5 stars
Alison Temple, kind-of-almost-codename-that-is-mentioned-at-the-very-beginning-and-then-without-another-reference-becomes-the-title Alison Wonderland, is fairly happy working at the all-female Fitzgerald's Bureau of Investigation in London. Her boss, Mrs Fitzgerald, is lovely and has a lot of “depth” (read “a disorganized mash of character traits”). There are apparently other women working there as well who are lovely, though we never see them so it appears Alison has no co-workers. She's even met some nice people, like her neighbor, Jeff, who is in love with her for no apparent reason, and this random chick Taron, who for all intensive purposes serves as Alison's best and only friend, though she is introduced as “a dippy club chick I know vaguely wants me to do some research.”
Anyway, this gets a little more complicated when Alison is assigned a portion of Operation Brown Dog, involving Emphglott, a company using buildings in the West Country that were supposed to be abandoned; inhumane treatment of animals; Majors Flower and Bird, two thugs with God-like control who had been hired by said company to defend against knowledge of said inhumane treatment of animals; and Miss Lester, the director of services. Also, there's a sheep/pig hybrid animal. I'm not entirely sure if this was supposed to be the inhumane treatment/experiment problem. It seemed well-cared for to me.
Because yes, we get to see the shig and its keeper, even though Alison never does. In fact, we get to see very many things Alison never does, due to a shifting perspective that lands on most every character (I don't think Taron ever gets it, though I could be wrong and am not terribly inclined to check), and, of course, sounds exactly the same for every single one except Alison, who gets first-person narration instead of third. This would annoy me more, except for the fact that it is sort of the only way the book tries to make any sense of its own plot.
I started to get concerned about this whole plot issue within the first thirty pages, when I was bored out of my mind and rereading the back flap just because it was shorter and saw it was called a literary novel, which kind of scared me because I've also seen the phrase used in place of “plotless rag.” I continued to be concerned about this whole plot issue through the entire book, perhaps because it's a little hard to tell when the action is picking up and the plot is advancing with your eyes glazed over. It doesn't help matters that everything is written the same way, whether Alison and Taron are sitting in a car driving for hours or Taron's friend is getting beat up by a pair of masked intruders. You know how authors will often make the pacing pick up around an action-filled part, and the pages start whipping by at a break-neck pace?
Not a chance. Not with Alison Wonderland.
What in my eyes was the most redeeming factor is actually something most people would consider the worst—the “hint of magic” referenced on the back cover blurb. Wiccan-type stuff, it's unexplained, completely random, and makes not a lick of sense. But it doesn't try to, which is actually a little refreshing. It comes in handy without seeming like as much of a deus ex machina, perhaps because the explanations that come from the non-magic-related deus ex machina moments are so terrible by comparison. Additionally, Alison thinks it's all crap, which adds an interesting layer and shows some character development on her part.
The whole book reads a little like one of my half-formed NaNoWriMo novels, except with a much more developed starting idea. Still, I'm not convinced Helen Smith had an editor. An editor would have slapped her upside the face and told her this, that and the other thing about her book sucked, so go fix it. And if she did have an editor, I'd like to find him or her and slap them for the same reason. It's a slow read, and a bit of a dry read, though I suppose it's interesting to think about later.
In short, an E for Effort and a D for Dreadful Execution, though I'd stop a good bit short of a T for Troll.
Alison Temple, kind-of-almost-codename-that-is-mentioned-at-the-very-beginning-and-then-without-another-reference-becomes-the-title Alison Wonderland, is fairly happy working at the all-female Fitzgerald's Bureau of Investigation in London. Her boss, Mrs Fitzgerald, is lovely and has a lot of “depth” (read “a disorganized mash of character traits”). There are apparently other women working there as well who are lovely, though we never see them so it appears Alison has no co-workers. She's even met some nice people, like her neighbor, Jeff, who is in love with her for no apparent reason, and this random chick Taron, who for all intensive purposes serves as Alison's best and only friend, though she is introduced as “a dippy club chick I know vaguely wants me to do some research.”
Anyway, this gets a little more complicated when Alison is assigned a portion of Operation Brown Dog, involving Emphglott, a company using buildings in the West Country that were supposed to be abandoned; inhumane treatment of animals; Majors Flower and Bird, two thugs with God-like control who had been hired by said company to defend against knowledge of said inhumane treatment of animals; and Miss Lester, the director of services. Also, there's a sheep/pig hybrid animal. I'm not entirely sure if this was supposed to be the inhumane treatment/experiment problem. It seemed well-cared for to me.
Because yes, we get to see the shig and its keeper, even though Alison never does. In fact, we get to see very many things Alison never does, due to a shifting perspective that lands on most every character (I don't think Taron ever gets it, though I could be wrong and am not terribly inclined to check), and, of course, sounds exactly the same for every single one except Alison, who gets first-person narration instead of third. This would annoy me more, except for the fact that it is sort of the only way the book tries to make any sense of its own plot.
I started to get concerned about this whole plot issue within the first thirty pages, when I was bored out of my mind and rereading the back flap just because it was shorter and saw it was called a literary novel, which kind of scared me because I've also seen the phrase used in place of “plotless rag.” I continued to be concerned about this whole plot issue through the entire book, perhaps because it's a little hard to tell when the action is picking up and the plot is advancing with your eyes glazed over. It doesn't help matters that everything is written the same way, whether Alison and Taron are sitting in a car driving for hours or Taron's friend is getting beat up by a pair of masked intruders. You know how authors will often make the pacing pick up around an action-filled part, and the pages start whipping by at a break-neck pace?
Not a chance. Not with Alison Wonderland.
What in my eyes was the most redeeming factor is actually something most people would consider the worst—the “hint of magic” referenced on the back cover blurb. Wiccan-type stuff, it's unexplained, completely random, and makes not a lick of sense. But it doesn't try to, which is actually a little refreshing. It comes in handy without seeming like as much of a deus ex machina, perhaps because the explanations that come from the non-magic-related deus ex machina moments are so terrible by comparison. Additionally, Alison thinks it's all crap, which adds an interesting layer and shows some character development on her part.
The whole book reads a little like one of my half-formed NaNoWriMo novels, except with a much more developed starting idea. Still, I'm not convinced Helen Smith had an editor. An editor would have slapped her upside the face and told her this, that and the other thing about her book sucked, so go fix it. And if she did have an editor, I'd like to find him or her and slap them for the same reason. It's a slow read, and a bit of a dry read, though I suppose it's interesting to think about later.
In short, an E for Effort and a D for Dreadful Execution, though I'd stop a good bit short of a T for Troll.
September 4, 2011
Yuk. Why, oh, why did I buy this book? Because it is British or the title caught my eye or the reviews called it "quirky" and "funny" and "character driven"? Because it was advertised in the flashing box on the top right corner on Goodreads? Or perhaps because it was only $3.99 for Kindle? For whatever reason, I bought it and kept reading it in hopes it would redeem itself. It didn't.
In a Q&A on Amazon, the author says, "I have to warn Lewis Carroll fans that any direct reference to his work in my book begins and ends with the pun in the title." I have to disagree. "Alison Wonderland" is confusing and weird, it has nothing to say, and as the Cheshire Cat says in "Alice in Wonderland", the characters are "all mad here".
As much as I have enjoyed the weirdness of Alice in Wonderland in the movies, I could not get into the book when I was younger. It was confusing and all over the place and made absolutely no sense to me. Of course, I grew to understand that the absurdity of the characters and setting was what made the book such a well loved classic. However, the characters in Alison Wonderland are not quirky, they are just weird and unlikable, whether heroine or foe. The setting is grim and seedy and tarnishing to my love of all things British. Yuk.
But the most confusing issues for me include the constant point of view switches, the jumping around from present to past to future tense, the shallow characterizations, the sudden R rated language that seemed to appear out of nowhere for shock value, and the narrative that was an obvious attempt at being whimsical and "quirky".
Now, it is likely that critics will love this book for the same reasons I don't like it, but my bottom line here is: I have so little time to read, I don't want to waste it on a stupid book that offers nothing other than sucking up the time spent reading it. I know, I know. I only have myself to blame for continuing to read past chapter 1. What is the compulsion I feel for giving a book so many chances? I keep on, like some kind of determined, half-crazed idiot, reading and reading and searching for something to redeem the time. Okay, the author did write some funny sentences, but they were tied together with a stupid plot, unlikable characters, ugliness, seediness and a seeming attempt at being so unique and cool that fell totally flat for this reader.
Wow. My review was nearly as long as the book. (BTW, it is now available for 99 cents for Kindle.)
In a Q&A on Amazon, the author says, "I have to warn Lewis Carroll fans that any direct reference to his work in my book begins and ends with the pun in the title." I have to disagree. "Alison Wonderland" is confusing and weird, it has nothing to say, and as the Cheshire Cat says in "Alice in Wonderland", the characters are "all mad here".
As much as I have enjoyed the weirdness of Alice in Wonderland in the movies, I could not get into the book when I was younger. It was confusing and all over the place and made absolutely no sense to me. Of course, I grew to understand that the absurdity of the characters and setting was what made the book such a well loved classic. However, the characters in Alison Wonderland are not quirky, they are just weird and unlikable, whether heroine or foe. The setting is grim and seedy and tarnishing to my love of all things British. Yuk.
But the most confusing issues for me include the constant point of view switches, the jumping around from present to past to future tense, the shallow characterizations, the sudden R rated language that seemed to appear out of nowhere for shock value, and the narrative that was an obvious attempt at being whimsical and "quirky".
Now, it is likely that critics will love this book for the same reasons I don't like it, but my bottom line here is: I have so little time to read, I don't want to waste it on a stupid book that offers nothing other than sucking up the time spent reading it. I know, I know. I only have myself to blame for continuing to read past chapter 1. What is the compulsion I feel for giving a book so many chances? I keep on, like some kind of determined, half-crazed idiot, reading and reading and searching for something to redeem the time. Okay, the author did write some funny sentences, but they were tied together with a stupid plot, unlikable characters, ugliness, seediness and a seeming attempt at being so unique and cool that fell totally flat for this reader.
Wow. My review was nearly as long as the book. (BTW, it is now available for 99 cents for Kindle.)
December 4, 2013
Private detective Alison Temple works for an all women detective agency. Most of her cases require getting the goods on philandering husbands. Neither fun nor exciting, but maybe a way for a little revenge by proxy against her ex. Then there’s the big case she works for most of this book. But really, none of that matters. This isn’t a detective story. It’s something else. And I’m not sure what that is. It’s a little suspense. It’s a mid-life coming-of-age story as Alison moves between two distinct life phases. Last, maybe most importantly, it’s funny. Not exactly comedy. Not really satire or parody. Yet it has some of each.
Smith’s strongest writing talents are in characterization, bringing her quirky characters to life, and description, painting an easily visualized picture of each scene. Her subtle, yet wicked wit sneaks up and blindsides you with laughter. Fall down the rabbit hole and see for yourself.
Smith’s strongest writing talents are in characterization, bringing her quirky characters to life, and description, painting an easily visualized picture of each scene. Her subtle, yet wicked wit sneaks up and blindsides you with laughter. Fall down the rabbit hole and see for yourself.
July 3, 2010
I was given this novel to read in a review swap and am so glad I did! It is a great read!
Helen nails the hammer on the head with this though-provoking, true to life, true to human behavior and emotions novel Alison Wonderland.
Wonderland like a bunny rabbit falling through hole? No. Wonderland, like the perfect man she has yet to meet.
The opening chapters draws the reader right in with humor and dead-on wit.
The novel is relatable and the characters are genuine. The language is realistic and the flow is natural. Nothing feels forced.
I enjoyed this read, I review a lot! This novel was one of the best.
I recommend it to lovers of good writing, good story-telling, and lovers who have yet to find love!
Ami Blackwelder, author of The Hunted of 2060 (paranormal sci-fi romance)
Helen nails the hammer on the head with this though-provoking, true to life, true to human behavior and emotions novel Alison Wonderland.
Wonderland like a bunny rabbit falling through hole? No. Wonderland, like the perfect man she has yet to meet.
The opening chapters draws the reader right in with humor and dead-on wit.
The novel is relatable and the characters are genuine. The language is realistic and the flow is natural. Nothing feels forced.
I enjoyed this read, I review a lot! This novel was one of the best.
I recommend it to lovers of good writing, good story-telling, and lovers who have yet to find love!
Ami Blackwelder, author of The Hunted of 2060 (paranormal sci-fi romance)
August 22, 2011
The books opens with a great paragraph, "My name's Alison Temple and I used to have this line when people asked me if I'm married. I'd say, "I'm waiting for Mr. Wonderland and when I find him I'll get married. Until then I'm staying single." The kind of people who need to know whether or not you're married don't see the humour in a joke like that."
Unfortunately, the great opening and quirky bits of this book don't ever quite hang together. There are genetically engineered vegetables and animals, a search for a baby that will help combat evil, and psychic postmen, but it just doesn't work. There are bits of clever writing and some characters you wish you got know better, but at the end it's like a bunch of random bits of colored glass flung in the air - distracting and momentarily diverting, but not coherent or lasting. Pity.
Unfortunately, the great opening and quirky bits of this book don't ever quite hang together. There are genetically engineered vegetables and animals, a search for a baby that will help combat evil, and psychic postmen, but it just doesn't work. There are bits of clever writing and some characters you wish you got know better, but at the end it's like a bunch of random bits of colored glass flung in the air - distracting and momentarily diverting, but not coherent or lasting. Pity.
December 4, 2013
It's not often you come across a book that is enjoyable on so many levels. I was immediately drawn into the story of Alison and her world. I tried to read it slowly in order to simply enjoy the wonderful, quirky writing. But-a word of warning: if you are expecting a romantic detective story in the chic-lit genre, this book is not for you. If you do, however, appreciate good writing, unusual plot twists and a story with a dream-like quality, this book will delight and entertain you. The tongue-in-cheek satiric element made me laugh out loud many times. I'm not sure what genre this books fits into but anyone who reads it is in for a treat. It's encouraging to see that unusual books such as this one attracts the attention of a publisher
Helen Smith is a wonderful writer and I hope to read more of her work very soon.
Helen Smith is a wonderful writer and I hope to read more of her work very soon.
January 21, 2011
Terrific - brilliant. Every once in a while a story comes along that takes you on a journey, wherein you feel glad for having taken it, and saddened that it's over. I set this book down with both a feeling of regret, and the pleasure of having lost some hours to it.
Take the journey - you won't be disappointed that you did.
Martin Treanor
Take the journey - you won't be disappointed that you did.
Martin Treanor
March 28, 2012
Genre: Adult Contemporary Fiction
5 Stars! I LOVED this book!
First, I love the cover of this book! Alison Temple, aka Alison Wonderland, as she is looking out at London across the river Thames, with the London Bridge in the background, from her perspective! To find out how the last name of Wonderland figures in, you have to read this book! It is hilarious! If only I could think of neat plays on words like this, as this author, Helen Smith, does throughout her book!
Helen Smith's prose is pure British colloquialism, which for the American reader, does take a bit to adjust to, as we are not quite used to it. After adjusting to it, and it has to be appreciated, oh, there is so much humor! In fact, this is part of what makes this book so appealing, entertaining, descriptive, thought provoking, and hilarious at times! I love the British slang and trying to figure out what some of it meant. I needed a little help along the way, and did find it. Some British slang is so different than what we are used to, it gives this book an edge above the rest. You won't easily find sassy writing like this very often, and when you do, it is truly a flavorful treat to enjoy!
The author also brings to light several current events and talks about them from Alison's perspective throughout the book, for instance one of them being about genetically modified foods, which is a HUGE concern of mine as well, and continues on still today. I'm glad she brings several of these issues up. These issues 'do' need to be made more aware of and she does this in a great way through the characters.
This story starts of with Alison hiring a PI to find out whether or not her husband is cheating on her. The answer is yes. She spray paints a nasty message on her wedding dress just for her husband and leaves him. My kind of girl!
Alison ends up getting a job with the same PI firm she used in her hometown of London to spy on her husband with, Fitzgerald's Bureau of Investigation (the FBI). She is given several different assignments to work on at a time, which includes all types of various things to do, including stakeouts and more! Actually, she is given quite a variety of different assignments.
Alison has a great way of being very descriptive of people so well, at this point, especially a particular co-worker, that they are things we think about people, maybe feel a little guilty thinking this way, wondering if other people think the same way, and they do! I really enjoyed this! Alison tells us a lot about the different characters in this book. It's so descriptive it's quite enjoyable!
Aside from Alison's job at the PI Firm, Alison's new best friend, Taron, wants her to find out where people leave, or drop off babies when they are not wanted. Taron decides she wants to get one of those babies and raise one. Alison's not so sure Taron is quite up to this task.
On a whim, Taron decides she and Alison should go on Holiday (vacation) to the coast in Weymouth, England, and they go on the spur of the moment! What fun and a joy to read! You never really know what's coming next in this story at times, which makes it so fun to read!
I HIGHLY recommend this book if you like true British writing! You will definitely find that here and can really learn to appreciate it! This is a great, FUN, short book to escape with! Enjoy!
I received this book for “FREE” from the Author, Helen Smith, for free, in exchange to read the book and write a review about it. It is NOT required for the review I write to be either positive or negative, but, “of my own opinion.” I was provided with “NO MONIES” to read and write this review for this book, except for the pure enjoyment of reading it. I am disclosing this information in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255, http://www.access.gpo.gov/nara/cfr/wa...
Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.
5 Stars! I LOVED this book!
First, I love the cover of this book! Alison Temple, aka Alison Wonderland, as she is looking out at London across the river Thames, with the London Bridge in the background, from her perspective! To find out how the last name of Wonderland figures in, you have to read this book! It is hilarious! If only I could think of neat plays on words like this, as this author, Helen Smith, does throughout her book!
Helen Smith's prose is pure British colloquialism, which for the American reader, does take a bit to adjust to, as we are not quite used to it. After adjusting to it, and it has to be appreciated, oh, there is so much humor! In fact, this is part of what makes this book so appealing, entertaining, descriptive, thought provoking, and hilarious at times! I love the British slang and trying to figure out what some of it meant. I needed a little help along the way, and did find it. Some British slang is so different than what we are used to, it gives this book an edge above the rest. You won't easily find sassy writing like this very often, and when you do, it is truly a flavorful treat to enjoy!
The author also brings to light several current events and talks about them from Alison's perspective throughout the book, for instance one of them being about genetically modified foods, which is a HUGE concern of mine as well, and continues on still today. I'm glad she brings several of these issues up. These issues 'do' need to be made more aware of and she does this in a great way through the characters.
This story starts of with Alison hiring a PI to find out whether or not her husband is cheating on her. The answer is yes. She spray paints a nasty message on her wedding dress just for her husband and leaves him. My kind of girl!
Alison ends up getting a job with the same PI firm she used in her hometown of London to spy on her husband with, Fitzgerald's Bureau of Investigation (the FBI). She is given several different assignments to work on at a time, which includes all types of various things to do, including stakeouts and more! Actually, she is given quite a variety of different assignments.
Alison has a great way of being very descriptive of people so well, at this point, especially a particular co-worker, that they are things we think about people, maybe feel a little guilty thinking this way, wondering if other people think the same way, and they do! I really enjoyed this! Alison tells us a lot about the different characters in this book. It's so descriptive it's quite enjoyable!
Aside from Alison's job at the PI Firm, Alison's new best friend, Taron, wants her to find out where people leave, or drop off babies when they are not wanted. Taron decides she wants to get one of those babies and raise one. Alison's not so sure Taron is quite up to this task.
On a whim, Taron decides she and Alison should go on Holiday (vacation) to the coast in Weymouth, England, and they go on the spur of the moment! What fun and a joy to read! You never really know what's coming next in this story at times, which makes it so fun to read!
I HIGHLY recommend this book if you like true British writing! You will definitely find that here and can really learn to appreciate it! This is a great, FUN, short book to escape with! Enjoy!
I received this book for “FREE” from the Author, Helen Smith, for free, in exchange to read the book and write a review about it. It is NOT required for the review I write to be either positive or negative, but, “of my own opinion.” I was provided with “NO MONIES” to read and write this review for this book, except for the pure enjoyment of reading it. I am disclosing this information in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255, http://www.access.gpo.gov/nara/cfr/wa...
Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.
January 25, 2011
"My name's Alison Temple and I used to have this line when people asked me if I'm married. I'd say, 'I'm waiting for Mr Wonderland and when I find him I'll get married. Until then I'm staying single.' The kind of people who need to know whether or not you're married don't see the humor in a joke like that."
And so begins the tale of Alison Wonderland, a straightforward, amateur detective of sorts who's just trying to find her truth in life. In the meantime, she meanders around, making the best choices she can, and doing what she thinks is right. Alison has a downstairs neighbor who shows his love with poetry- between coming up with the next great invention (my favorite is the clock that makes time go slower or faster, depending upon what you want at the time), a job following and photographing unfaithful men, a crazy and possibly unstable friend, and, oh yeah, there's a man out there dead-set on finding out exactly what Alison knows, which is nothing at all, really.
With witty, straightforward writing, and well-developed characters, Helen Smith has crafted an engaging tale that takes us into Alison's life and thoughts. A big part of the appeal of this book is the sheer enjoyment as we saunter along with Alison, who finds herself in the oddest of situations- on a hillside, watching a man in love with his shig, tracking down an "unfaithful" husband who is actually just trying to make ends meet, helping a friend escape from a club supposedly frequented by singing monks, finding a baby in a box at the edge of the sea... life is never boring in Wonderland.
Written in the present tense with UK spelling and phrasing- including single quote marks for dialogue- some readers may need a few chapters to adjust to the style. I quite enjoyed the style, and was quickly immersed in the story. The tale sort of ambles along, not really intent upon getting anywhere. At times, I found myself wondering if we were really even headed in the same direction as we started. It's really less of an progression towards an end of some sort, and more a study of the characters contained with the pages.There is some growth to be seen in some of the characters, and in Alison's character, in particular. Each bizarre turn spurs Alison on again and we discover more about who she is and what she is becoming through those turns of event. There are several different storylines going on in the story, and they don't all get tied up in neat little packages at the end, but, somehow, the ending is fitting and gives a sense of closure anyway.
Loosely connected, but utterly entertaining, this is a fun read all around.
@MotherLode blog
And so begins the tale of Alison Wonderland, a straightforward, amateur detective of sorts who's just trying to find her truth in life. In the meantime, she meanders around, making the best choices she can, and doing what she thinks is right. Alison has a downstairs neighbor who shows his love with poetry- between coming up with the next great invention (my favorite is the clock that makes time go slower or faster, depending upon what you want at the time), a job following and photographing unfaithful men, a crazy and possibly unstable friend, and, oh yeah, there's a man out there dead-set on finding out exactly what Alison knows, which is nothing at all, really.
With witty, straightforward writing, and well-developed characters, Helen Smith has crafted an engaging tale that takes us into Alison's life and thoughts. A big part of the appeal of this book is the sheer enjoyment as we saunter along with Alison, who finds herself in the oddest of situations- on a hillside, watching a man in love with his shig, tracking down an "unfaithful" husband who is actually just trying to make ends meet, helping a friend escape from a club supposedly frequented by singing monks, finding a baby in a box at the edge of the sea... life is never boring in Wonderland.
Written in the present tense with UK spelling and phrasing- including single quote marks for dialogue- some readers may need a few chapters to adjust to the style. I quite enjoyed the style, and was quickly immersed in the story. The tale sort of ambles along, not really intent upon getting anywhere. At times, I found myself wondering if we were really even headed in the same direction as we started. It's really less of an progression towards an end of some sort, and more a study of the characters contained with the pages.There is some growth to be seen in some of the characters, and in Alison's character, in particular. Each bizarre turn spurs Alison on again and we discover more about who she is and what she is becoming through those turns of event. There are several different storylines going on in the story, and they don't all get tied up in neat little packages at the end, but, somehow, the ending is fitting and gives a sense of closure anyway.
Loosely connected, but utterly entertaining, this is a fun read all around.
@MotherLode blog
December 23, 2012
I’ll need to say this: this novel was unique and I am talking about the way the story and certain events occurred. I loved this! There were moments when I was confused, but that was all in the plot and in the end mostly everything is clear. I also enjoyed all the surprising twists, so if you like being surprised; this is the book for you.
It would be impossible for me to put it under just one genre. When I started reading the synopsis I had the impression that it was a drama, after reading it I found out that this book had adventure, mystery and comedy as well.
And I don’t say this very often, but I liked all the characters in this book. I enjoyed the different personalities Helen Smith attributed to every character. Still I had one favorite character, well I liked her more: Taron. I liked her craziness. I liked her more than I liked Alison, but that of course is just me being attached to a character that is not the main one.
There was also a life lesson, or at least I saw it. Alison breaks up with her husband because he was cheating on her. Still she acts tough and understands that life goes on either way. She proves that she is a strong and independent woman and decides to get hired as an investigator at the same company that helped her prove that her husband cheated on her.
This book was fun, filled with amusing situations, smart and funny dialogue. I recommend it to anyone that needs to laugh hard.
It would be impossible for me to put it under just one genre. When I started reading the synopsis I had the impression that it was a drama, after reading it I found out that this book had adventure, mystery and comedy as well.
And I don’t say this very often, but I liked all the characters in this book. I enjoyed the different personalities Helen Smith attributed to every character. Still I had one favorite character, well I liked her more: Taron. I liked her craziness. I liked her more than I liked Alison, but that of course is just me being attached to a character that is not the main one.
There was also a life lesson, or at least I saw it. Alison breaks up with her husband because he was cheating on her. Still she acts tough and understands that life goes on either way. She proves that she is a strong and independent woman and decides to get hired as an investigator at the same company that helped her prove that her husband cheated on her.
This book was fun, filled with amusing situations, smart and funny dialogue. I recommend it to anyone that needs to laugh hard.
December 7, 2010
I recently finished reading Alison Wonderland by Helen Smith and found it to be quite refreshing. Written with UK grammar and spelling, this book does take a few chapters to get comfortable with the writing style. As well as the difference in grammar, Alison Wonderland jumps from character to character, letting us experience their separate thoughts and feelings as their share a combined journey in the book. After you get used to the writing style, you can comfortably follow Alison on her ups and downs as she acquires a job at a private investigators office. She handles mostly cheating husband cases but soon finds herself investing a different case. At times I felt as though there was an abundance of details as Alison often gets sidetracked with various thoughts to herself that can sometimes confuse the reader. Sometimes you are left thinking what the point is of some of the characters’ thoughts. However, it all came together nicely and was a pleasant and quirky read. There is some mild adult language throughout and adult themes that may make some readers a bit nervous so I would definitely suggest that it be read by strictly mature audiences.
December 19, 2013
I really loved Alison Wonderland. I’m always looking for books that I can escape into and this one hit the mark! It’s magical, wacky, and really fun to read. I ended staying up way past my bedtime to finish it because I couldn’t put it down! I loved that the main character is surrounded by interesting, and somewhat bizarre people and ends up working for the same PI firm that she hired to catch her cheating husband. I loved that! I found this book had just the right amount of magic and realism which I think is a hard combo to balance and Helen Smith really found that balance brilliantly. I also really love detective stories and this book was a combination of detective story and character driven book. It’s not necessarily a linear plot but a plot and characters that are for people who can read it from a magical point of view.
I plan on going back and finding other books by this author and reading them. If you want a very fun, can’t put down book that lets you fully escape buy this one! You’ll be happy you did.
I plan on going back and finding other books by this author and reading them. If you want a very fun, can’t put down book that lets you fully escape buy this one! You’ll be happy you did.
September 20, 2011
Well if you have adhd this is the book for you! It was all over the place...half the time I wasn't sure what the story was about, hell I'm still not sure I know for sure. I gather one lesson is some things you have to loose to know how important they were, but by then it's to late.
This book has NOTHING to do with Alice in wonderland. It's about a girl who gets cheated on becomes a PI has a bizare friendship with a strange woman who lives in a world of her own making, has a neighbor that might be more then a friend but it's one sided for he loves her and she well strings him along. She gets scared out of town on a case you don't really get a good sense of what the case is really about. She finds an abandoned baby and takes it. It's all of the place and then the author trys to tie it all up in three chapters. Left me confused and wondering what the heck did I just read?
This book has NOTHING to do with Alice in wonderland. It's about a girl who gets cheated on becomes a PI has a bizare friendship with a strange woman who lives in a world of her own making, has a neighbor that might be more then a friend but it's one sided for he loves her and she well strings him along. She gets scared out of town on a case you don't really get a good sense of what the case is really about. She finds an abandoned baby and takes it. It's all of the place and then the author trys to tie it all up in three chapters. Left me confused and wondering what the heck did I just read?
September 5, 2011
I was really exited for this book, lots of potential, but it never delivered. I kept thinking "ok, now something will happen... wait, wait... now" And then all of a sudden I was 95% through the book and NOTHING HAD HAPPENED! This book was disjointed, offensive in some parts, full of mental images I didn't need, drugs I didn't care to hear about, and "witchcraft" (quotation marks because I don't know if it actually follows documented witchcraft or if her friend was just a nut). I was thoroughly confused throughout the better part of this book. I actually finished it, but I should have stopped reading about 30% of the way through.
September 18, 2010
This book is different from many other books. It is honestly unlike any other book I have ever read. I love this book though. Helen Smith shows observations of people's actions and thoughts throughout the book in a way that many of us are not used to. They sometimes catch you off guard in the best kind of way while reading.
Overall I'm extremely happy I picked the book up for my kindle it was worth more than the 2.99 I paid for it.
Overall I'm extremely happy I picked the book up for my kindle it was worth more than the 2.99 I paid for it.
December 4, 2013
I loved this book! Helen Smith draws her readers into Alison Temple's world and takes them on a wild and wacky adventure. Her insights were witty and hilarious; several made me laugh out loud. I truly enjoyed Alison and the cast of characters around her. I look forward to reading more of Ms. Smith's work.
February 13, 2014
Oh my goodness, this book was bad. Really, awfully bad. It's Bridget Jones as a detective, sort of. Except the characters aren't drawn well, there is little to no plot, and it all ends in a heap instead of a bow, or linear story. However, I couldn't stop reading because I was trying to figure out what on earth this book was - thankfully it isn't a slog.
November 29, 2022
Trigger/Content warnings may be considered spoilers about certain themes or plot twists in the story
Transphobic slur (not fag, meaning cigarette in the author's region); Sexism, Quid Pro Quo; Beastiality; Racist slur; Drug abuse; Fatphobia; Mentions of a dead baby; Child abandonment; Kidnapping
Alison Temple, a woman working for an all female PI company, gets a wild case, and then decides to go on a road trip with her best friend.
Helen Smith mentions an editor in her acknowledgements. I've written his name down so should I ever publish a book I stay far far away from him. Grammar rules are not followed, there's missing words everywhere, improper punctuation… I could go on. Smith also only uses first person POV for Alison. And really poorly done third person POV for chapters about any other character without giving a hint at who's POV we're following. There's non-stop run on sentences. Smith also decided to give us a paragraph with the world's most poorly written blowjob out of NOWHERE. She has a scene where Alison and Taron have done substances and proceed to drink booze to "take the edge off". I cannot stress how horribly awfully dangerous and DEADLY this is. Do not EVER mix substances and booze. There's a scene where an old man makes love to a sheep pig. Why? No clue. The author has an obsession with abandoned babies, substance abuse, and edge lord culture. Each character was awful in their own right. Alison Temple: Goes by Alison Wonderland 3-5 times the whole book. Private investigator who specializes in cheating men because she was cheated on. She is now (randomly) investigating some animal abuse drug experiment thing. Clive: Brother of Mrs. Fitzgerald (owner of the PI company Alison works for) who is mentally ill and plays into digesting, offensive, and harmful stereotypes. Taron: Drug using best friend of Alison. Has maybe 2 brain cells on a good day. Believes in every superstition known to man from every culture known to man. Wants Alison to find an abandoned baby for her mother who is lonely. Taron's mom: Claims to be a witch who communicates telepathically. Basically an insult to paganism. There’s also a slew of random characters we know nothing about or why they matter, and truly they don’t matter. In summary, Helen Smith made a mockery of Paganism, insulted fat people, promoted substance abuse and deadly mixing of substances and insulted Romani, transgender, and mentally ill people as well as women. The author and the editor of this book had to be intoxicated on something to publish this, and frankly anyone who gave it more than 3 stars had to be intoxicated while reading it.
Transphobic slur (not fag, meaning cigarette in the author's region); Sexism, Quid Pro Quo; Beastiality; Racist slur; Drug abuse; Fatphobia; Mentions of a dead baby; Child abandonment; Kidnapping
Alison Temple, a woman working for an all female PI company, gets a wild case, and then decides to go on a road trip with her best friend.
Helen Smith mentions an editor in her acknowledgements. I've written his name down so should I ever publish a book I stay far far away from him. Grammar rules are not followed, there's missing words everywhere, improper punctuation… I could go on. Smith also only uses first person POV for Alison. And really poorly done third person POV for chapters about any other character without giving a hint at who's POV we're following. There's non-stop run on sentences. Smith also decided to give us a paragraph with the world's most poorly written blowjob out of NOWHERE. She has a scene where Alison and Taron have done substances and proceed to drink booze to "take the edge off". I cannot stress how horribly awfully dangerous and DEADLY this is. Do not EVER mix substances and booze. There's a scene where an old man makes love to a sheep pig. Why? No clue. The author has an obsession with abandoned babies, substance abuse, and edge lord culture. Each character was awful in their own right. Alison Temple: Goes by Alison Wonderland 3-5 times the whole book. Private investigator who specializes in cheating men because she was cheated on. She is now (randomly) investigating some animal abuse drug experiment thing. Clive: Brother of Mrs. Fitzgerald (owner of the PI company Alison works for) who is mentally ill and plays into digesting, offensive, and harmful stereotypes. Taron: Drug using best friend of Alison. Has maybe 2 brain cells on a good day. Believes in every superstition known to man from every culture known to man. Wants Alison to find an abandoned baby for her mother who is lonely. Taron's mom: Claims to be a witch who communicates telepathically. Basically an insult to paganism. There’s also a slew of random characters we know nothing about or why they matter, and truly they don’t matter. In summary, Helen Smith made a mockery of Paganism, insulted fat people, promoted substance abuse and deadly mixing of substances and insulted Romani, transgender, and mentally ill people as well as women. The author and the editor of this book had to be intoxicated on something to publish this, and frankly anyone who gave it more than 3 stars had to be intoxicated while reading it.
August 18, 2013
Falling into the rabbit hole of Helen Smith’s “Alison Wonderland”, requires the reader to suspend reality at the first page and roll through the quite mad near-future romp with Alison Templer P.I.
Alison is a 30ish Londoner who sees the world from the perspective of her position at the all-female Fitzgerald Bureau of Investigation, the FBI. She works for her boss Mrs. Fitzgerald, Ella to her friends. The novel is a spoof of corporate spying set in the near-future, with the focus on a genetic engineering corporation Emphglott that combines animal DNA into new breeds; a Shig ( sheep and pig) features rather centrally in the tale. Protesters are of concern to the multinational company and its investigation agency. They are focused on what Alison's client, who is connected to the protesters, is up to. Helen Smith enjoys telegraphing with names and we have Major Flower and Major General Bird running the Control Inter (CI) intelligence agency protecting Emphglott’s interests.
In the meantime Alison friend Taron a true ditsy doodle, a Madhatter of sorts, has hired the P.I. to research where the best odds are to find foundlings. Taron whose life is 80% make-believe, is fixated on her quest to find a baby to apprentice to her mother - a telepathic witch.
Don’t expect this book to make sense as a straightforward whodunit tale. Unprepared this book can set the reader off in a tailspin. Love it or leave it, there doesn't seem to be an in between perspective in reviews. The author has borrowed from the comic bonkers style of Lewis Carroll and placed Alison into a pseudo-realistic wonderland of modern London. Her relationships with people ring true though and bring to mind the thought that reality is not what people say but what they do. The novel mixes together eclectic characters into a farcical tale that holds ironic truths about data collection, collusion and conspiracy plots.
Upon closing the cover of Alison Wonderland the reader will look at reality a little differently and probably have had a good laugh along the way. Paraphrasing the White Queen, this book makes enjoying six impossible things before breakfast very likely.
5-stars
(4-stars plus 1 for uniqueness).
Alice laughed. ‘There’s no use trying,’ she said: ‘one can’t believe impossible things.’
‘I daresay you haven’t had much practice,’ said the Queen. ‘When I was your age, I always did it for half-an-hour a day. Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.”
Lewis Carroll
Posted on www.ebooknews.ca Aug. 18, 2013
Alison is a 30ish Londoner who sees the world from the perspective of her position at the all-female Fitzgerald Bureau of Investigation, the FBI. She works for her boss Mrs. Fitzgerald, Ella to her friends. The novel is a spoof of corporate spying set in the near-future, with the focus on a genetic engineering corporation Emphglott that combines animal DNA into new breeds; a Shig ( sheep and pig) features rather centrally in the tale. Protesters are of concern to the multinational company and its investigation agency. They are focused on what Alison's client, who is connected to the protesters, is up to. Helen Smith enjoys telegraphing with names and we have Major Flower and Major General Bird running the Control Inter (CI) intelligence agency protecting Emphglott’s interests.
In the meantime Alison friend Taron a true ditsy doodle, a Madhatter of sorts, has hired the P.I. to research where the best odds are to find foundlings. Taron whose life is 80% make-believe, is fixated on her quest to find a baby to apprentice to her mother - a telepathic witch.
Don’t expect this book to make sense as a straightforward whodunit tale. Unprepared this book can set the reader off in a tailspin. Love it or leave it, there doesn't seem to be an in between perspective in reviews. The author has borrowed from the comic bonkers style of Lewis Carroll and placed Alison into a pseudo-realistic wonderland of modern London. Her relationships with people ring true though and bring to mind the thought that reality is not what people say but what they do. The novel mixes together eclectic characters into a farcical tale that holds ironic truths about data collection, collusion and conspiracy plots.
Upon closing the cover of Alison Wonderland the reader will look at reality a little differently and probably have had a good laugh along the way. Paraphrasing the White Queen, this book makes enjoying six impossible things before breakfast very likely.
5-stars
(4-stars plus 1 for uniqueness).
Alice laughed. ‘There’s no use trying,’ she said: ‘one can’t believe impossible things.’
‘I daresay you haven’t had much practice,’ said the Queen. ‘When I was your age, I always did it for half-an-hour a day. Why, sometimes I’ve believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.”
Lewis Carroll
Posted on www.ebooknews.ca Aug. 18, 2013
June 6, 2012
I recently received a true ‘gift’ in the mail from an author living in England. I was not only in love with the title right off the bat, but the cover, the synopsis and the first paragraph had me at ‘Hello.’
Alison Temple is what you would call a ‘stand-offish’ gal. The very first thing readers find out about her is the fact that when people asked her if she was married, she would reply: “I’m waiting for Mr. Wonderland and when I find him I’ll get married. Until then I’m staying single.” (Truer words have never been spoken - right, ladies?)
Anyway, Alison did get married, but it was one of those 50% that end in…yup…cheating. At least, Alison believed that her husband was a cheating ‘perv’ and she wanted out of a bad situation. So, what did she do? She hired an all-female (You Go Girls!) private detective agency to spy on him, and when they discovered Alison was completely correct in her assumption, she packed up and hit the road. The husband, by the way, disappeared completely. However, before she left, Alison put her wedding dress on the bed, sprayed red paint on it, and attached a note that read: “You broke my heart.” Talk about making a lasting statement.
Alison went on to gain employment with the very detective agency that’d found her husband cheating. Becoming an investigator, Alison is sent out on cases and also works part-time in the office. Here best friend, Taron, is what you would call a little bit ‘nuts’ and insists that her mother is a witch. (She’s not the only one).
Alison also knows Jeff, a very ‘poetic’ neighbor who is more than a little in love with Alison. Add to her world a psychic postman, and the various stories in this strange life jump right off the pages.
This is not a ‘lazy’ afternoon read. You have to pay attention because the plot is fast! But when the reader realizes that the plot and characters move quickly, this book will keep them on the edge of their La-Z-Boy’s waiting to see what they’ll do next.
Alison and her various pals tend to treat all their adventures with a calm serenity; they know Buddhist Drummers and spend time checking up on homeless babies. Perhaps some will find the narrative a bit crude at times but, to me, it was absolutely hysterical.
Until Next Time, Everybody,
Amy
Alison Temple is what you would call a ‘stand-offish’ gal. The very first thing readers find out about her is the fact that when people asked her if she was married, she would reply: “I’m waiting for Mr. Wonderland and when I find him I’ll get married. Until then I’m staying single.” (Truer words have never been spoken - right, ladies?)
Anyway, Alison did get married, but it was one of those 50% that end in…yup…cheating. At least, Alison believed that her husband was a cheating ‘perv’ and she wanted out of a bad situation. So, what did she do? She hired an all-female (You Go Girls!) private detective agency to spy on him, and when they discovered Alison was completely correct in her assumption, she packed up and hit the road. The husband, by the way, disappeared completely. However, before she left, Alison put her wedding dress on the bed, sprayed red paint on it, and attached a note that read: “You broke my heart.” Talk about making a lasting statement.
Alison went on to gain employment with the very detective agency that’d found her husband cheating. Becoming an investigator, Alison is sent out on cases and also works part-time in the office. Here best friend, Taron, is what you would call a little bit ‘nuts’ and insists that her mother is a witch. (She’s not the only one).
Alison also knows Jeff, a very ‘poetic’ neighbor who is more than a little in love with Alison. Add to her world a psychic postman, and the various stories in this strange life jump right off the pages.
This is not a ‘lazy’ afternoon read. You have to pay attention because the plot is fast! But when the reader realizes that the plot and characters move quickly, this book will keep them on the edge of their La-Z-Boy’s waiting to see what they’ll do next.
Alison and her various pals tend to treat all their adventures with a calm serenity; they know Buddhist Drummers and spend time checking up on homeless babies. Perhaps some will find the narrative a bit crude at times but, to me, it was absolutely hysterical.
Until Next Time, Everybody,
Amy
November 4, 2015
I was contacted by the author, asking whether I would review this book. It sounded quirky, and I’m a sucker for London-set stories, so I was happy to oblige.
When twenty-something Alison suspects her husband of playing away from home, she hires a PI to confirm her suspicions. When her marriage disolves, she impulsively decides to take a job with the same PI firm and embrace single life.
Some time later, she takes a road trip with her best friend Taron who has had her checking which areas she would most likely find an abandoned baby to give as a gift to her mother who she believes is a witch. An unfortunate series of coincidences mean that Alison and Taron become embroiled in a darker plot which comes to its climax in secret tunnels below London.
This was a gorgeous, whimsical storythat was quite magical in its own way. All of the characters were slightly quirky – including Jeff, Alison’s poem-writing neighbour who was in love with her and her psychic postman.
Some of the observations on human nature are absolutely spot on, but don’t seem at all convoluted at all. For example, “People who work in offices are crazy, and they create an environment they hate, write rules they want to break, cast each other in roles they despise.” I have worked in those offices (although luckily not in my current job!)
There’s a lovely section about having to wear buy and wear tights – something I’m sure most office-working ladies have complained about at various points in their lives. Not so amusing for men, but this book definitely isn’t aimed at them.
This is a lovely quirky little tale, with good humour, great observation, surreal twists and a little darkness. I really, really enjoyed it, and felt I’d lost a friend when I got to the end and had to part ways with Alison and her motley crew.
When twenty-something Alison suspects her husband of playing away from home, she hires a PI to confirm her suspicions. When her marriage disolves, she impulsively decides to take a job with the same PI firm and embrace single life.
Some time later, she takes a road trip with her best friend Taron who has had her checking which areas she would most likely find an abandoned baby to give as a gift to her mother who she believes is a witch. An unfortunate series of coincidences mean that Alison and Taron become embroiled in a darker plot which comes to its climax in secret tunnels below London.
This was a gorgeous, whimsical storythat was quite magical in its own way. All of the characters were slightly quirky – including Jeff, Alison’s poem-writing neighbour who was in love with her and her psychic postman.
Some of the observations on human nature are absolutely spot on, but don’t seem at all convoluted at all. For example, “People who work in offices are crazy, and they create an environment they hate, write rules they want to break, cast each other in roles they despise.” I have worked in those offices (although luckily not in my current job!)
There’s a lovely section about having to wear buy and wear tights – something I’m sure most office-working ladies have complained about at various points in their lives. Not so amusing for men, but this book definitely isn’t aimed at them.
This is a lovely quirky little tale, with good humour, great observation, surreal twists and a little darkness. I really, really enjoyed it, and felt I’d lost a friend when I got to the end and had to part ways with Alison and her motley crew.
August 19, 2012
I found this a charming, whimsical read; it is not strong on plot or action, but very like music sometimes called "easy-listening." It is told with sections in the first person and others in the third person.
The first person character, Alison, is a 30-ish woman who divorced her husband after her suspicions were confirmed by the detective agency she hires. She eventually goes to work at this agency, run by a Mrs. "Ella Fitzgerald." At first she does a few investigations into situations similar to her own experience. She learns that in cases involving possible infidelity most women are interested in "risk assessment": is the husband having a fling with a floozy or is the other woman a "soft looking blonde whose womb is twitching because she is approaching thirty" and she'd like "some up-scale sperm and an expensive house in which to breed."
Then a couple of twists take over. Alison runs into a "dippy club chick" who believes her mother is a witch and who wants to hire her to research abandoned babies. She also is given an assignment involving "counter-espionage" against some project genetically modifying ANIMALS. She learns that "being loved is a huge responsibility," and dismisses a potential person of interest as only "wit and wobble."
Not to spoil anyone's read, but a baby is found, and the client's witch/mother battles an evil force on the side of those trying to genetically modify animals for human consumption. The confrontation is not on the scale of a battle against He-who-must-not-be-named, you understand, but the good guys win. But it is a whimsical story and somewhat wistful.
The first person character, Alison, is a 30-ish woman who divorced her husband after her suspicions were confirmed by the detective agency she hires. She eventually goes to work at this agency, run by a Mrs. "Ella Fitzgerald." At first she does a few investigations into situations similar to her own experience. She learns that in cases involving possible infidelity most women are interested in "risk assessment": is the husband having a fling with a floozy or is the other woman a "soft looking blonde whose womb is twitching because she is approaching thirty" and she'd like "some up-scale sperm and an expensive house in which to breed."
Then a couple of twists take over. Alison runs into a "dippy club chick" who believes her mother is a witch and who wants to hire her to research abandoned babies. She also is given an assignment involving "counter-espionage" against some project genetically modifying ANIMALS. She learns that "being loved is a huge responsibility," and dismisses a potential person of interest as only "wit and wobble."
Not to spoil anyone's read, but a baby is found, and the client's witch/mother battles an evil force on the side of those trying to genetically modify animals for human consumption. The confrontation is not on the scale of a battle against He-who-must-not-be-named, you understand, but the good guys win. But it is a whimsical story and somewhat wistful.
April 14, 2012
Alison Wonderland is a modern English novel yet is flavoured almost as American as a first-person present-tense radio drama such as Sara Paretsky's "V.I Warshawski" manages to stay true to its roots through its distinct chapters with the many quintessential London references from start to end.
However, Alison Wonderland is deeper.
Throughout the story, alongside the narration by Alison, fine attention to detail is paid to the cast of bizarre characters' (and cleverly) their movements between the real and the surreal.
This is an intellectual novel intended for adults amongst us rather than youngsters, without it being an 'Adult' novel, a female novel without being 'chick-lit'.
Any negative reviews of Alison Wonderland might stem simply from the unusual fact that Helen Smith's novel crosses distinct literary genres.
A polished novel with defining chapters which move quickly with strong modern dialogue.
Recommended.
However, Alison Wonderland is deeper.
Throughout the story, alongside the narration by Alison, fine attention to detail is paid to the cast of bizarre characters' (and cleverly) their movements between the real and the surreal.
This is an intellectual novel intended for adults amongst us rather than youngsters, without it being an 'Adult' novel, a female novel without being 'chick-lit'.
Any negative reviews of Alison Wonderland might stem simply from the unusual fact that Helen Smith's novel crosses distinct literary genres.
A polished novel with defining chapters which move quickly with strong modern dialogue.
Recommended.
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