Odd Girl Speaks Out: Girls Write about Bullies, Cliques, Popularity, and Jealousy

by Rachel Simmons

The national bestseller Odd Girl Out exposed a hidden culture of cruelty that had always been quietly endured by American girls. As Rachel Simmons toured the country, these girls found their voices and spoke to her about their pain. They wanted to talk-and they weren't the only ones. Mothers, teachers, counselors, young professional women, even fathers, came to Rachel with heart-wrenching personal stories that could no longer be kept secret.
Here, Rachel creates a safe place for girls to talk, rant, sound off, and find each other. The result is a collection of wonderful accounts of the inner lives of adolescent girls. Candid and disarming, creative and expressive, and always exceptionally self-aware, these poems, songs, confessions, and essays form a journal of American girlhood. They show us how deeply cruelty flows and how strongly these girls want to change.
Odd Girl Out helped girls find their voices; Odd Girl Speaks Out helps them tell their stories.

I'm always the odd girl out
No one talks to me
I try to be friendly and speak out
But I'm invisible, see?

You know, gossip is a natural thing in high school. I'm one of those girls that will
do it right in front of you. I'll whisper at my friends and look at you the whole time.
Then we'll all cut up laughing. You know we're talking about you.

My best friend and I started being friends with this other girl. But she was fat. It was hard because she always wanted to go down the slide second and she would crush us. We didn't want to tell her she was fat, so we decided to drop her. Her mother called my mother and
told her we were being mean. But we just couldn't be friends with her anymore.

-from Odd Girl Speaks Out

Genres: Nonfiction, Parenting, Psychology, Memoir, Self Help, Education, Inspirational

199 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2004

Reviews

[Sheila · Rating 5 out of 5]

a very interesting look in to girls world of bullying from all sides of it. Its a view from the bulllied to the bullier to the observer. A must read for parents. Its got some great skill sets in the back for girls to read about and use. I plan to have my 11 yr old read it!

[Presley · Rating 3 out of 5]

Odd Girl Speaks Out is a collection of writings of girls telling their stories of being bullied. It teaches lessons, such as how to get over the feeling of being the odd one out, as well of the hurt feelings after getting bullied. The book wants to let girls know that they are not the only ones in the world with that problem, and it is helpful to read the experiences of others, and how they handled their situations. This was the sequel to Odd Girl Out, by the same author, only that book was only from the author's perspective. The author got her idea for the book after a girl in her leadership camp confided in her with a problem she was having. It was not until that girl spoke about her problem that she felt better. I think this is a great book for anyone that either has been a victim of bullying or know that they have been the bully themselves. This will give new perspectives to either person.

[Meredith Henning · Rating 2 out of 5]

Really a 2.5, but couldn't quite give this a 3. This one came up in my library queue before the original book Odd Girl Out came in, so decided to go ahead and read this one. It is interesting and sad. It's hard to believe that parents don't see alot that is happening to their children in a school setting and how painful certain bullying/clique situations can be for the girls involved. I am happy to say that we are void of this kind of behavior in our own social circles and avoid much of the nonsense that goes on in a school setting due to our choice to home educate.

A must read for anyone in public or private school as these are real situations that are certainly not goind away any time soon.

[TimeToRead · Rating 3 out of 5]

Nice book but a lot of descriptions going on

[Sofia · Rating 5 out of 5]

I thought it was a great book. There were tons of stories from girls as they give their accounts on the mean girls in their school, jealousy, bullying, and what a true friend really is. Some of the stories were heartbreaking, as some girls went through so much verbal/emotional abuse(and sometimes physical), that they have developed chemical depression, attempted suicides, and eating disorders such as anorexia and bulimia. But even though it can be a little, well blunt, about how girls can tear each other apart, it was a really good experience, and i urge any girl to read it. It gives you tips when you are in a fight with a friend, and also can be a wake up call. When I read it, some of the stories really applied to what I have gone through(in the past, and the present), and made me realize that I wasn't alone. That millions of girls go through some of the same things as I was, and that the ones that suffered now would become wonderful people, and this would only strengthen them as a person, and the ones who created the suffering, well they are usually going through some things too that can trigger these behaviors. One important lesson this book taught is that us girls don't always need to be "good girls".
We grow up in a society where all girls have to be nice to everyone, and if you aren't nice to everyone, you are a horrible person. This stereotype actually causes more behaviors like this. Anyway....it's a good book :)

[Susan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Every teen girl (and parent of teen girls and those who work with teen girls) should read this book.

[Aubrey · Rating 3 out of 5]

it matches my story in real life

[Jackie · Rating 4 out of 5]

In a recent freewrite in my classes, I asked girls to write about their "battles" in life, and what "weapons" have helped them survive and conquer them. While some wrote about specific struggles and family issues, others wrote equally about their friendships being the source of both tension and solace. As a mother of tween-age girls who seem to be growing older by the second, I was comforted to see how many wrote about their parents being their allies, and I found myself wishing I could give them all copies of the "Odd Girl" books I've come to find so valuable.

Odd Girl Speaks Out is a welcome companion to Rachel Simmons' wonderful Odd Girl Out, and adds a welcome and authentic dimension composed primarily of girls writing about their own experiences and the lessons they learned along the way. Some girls write narratives, others poems, and some seem further along the self-forgiveness or understanding journey than others, which avoids a too-pat message that everything painful can be wrapped up in a neat bow. The personal pieces written by girls have been thematically grouped by Simmons, who also writes short framing pieces for each group that help explain the context as well as give practical advice in a girl-friendly tone that is pragmatic yet accessible, backed by the voices of the girls themselves.

After I reviewed Odd Girl Out, several friends and commenters wrote to ask if I thought it was appropriate for the girls themselves. I can now say that Odd Girl Speaks Out is the best choice here, especially if your girls, like mine, have already read much of the friendship advice aimed at a slightly younger elementary school crowd. I described the content briefly to my daughters and said I had left it on the hall table in case they wanted to give it a try. One of my girls went immediately out, grabbed it, and curled up on the couch for a few hours, emerging only to tell me, "This book is really good."

While I can see myself returning to Odd Girl Out periodically over the next few years of parenting and teaching adolescent girls, I think my girls will do the same with Odd Girl Speaks Out, and I'm so pleased to have found these volumes at what seems like exactly the right time for my family.

[Enrique Rizo · Rating 5 out of 5]

In the book Odd Girl Speaks Out: Girls Write about Bullies, Cliques, Popularity, and Jealousy the author, Rachel Simmons, did an excellent job on expressing what many girls feel. The author used excellent examples from many young girls to help others relate and feel that connection between the girls and the reader. Simmons will put vivid images into whoever reads her book. It relates to both the girls who have miserable times at school and those that see others miserable as well. This book will help the reader see what young girls go through and what they do to confront their troubles. In some cases there may not be a solution at all but rather a way to cope with the situation. Anyone who reads her book will feel sympathy for the girls in the book. They will know that when they see a young girl smiling that there may be an entirely different person within suffering from daily problems in or even out of school. It teaches us how girls find refugee among other girls and share their feelings to each other. Unfortunately, continuing that relationship may result in another/others to hurt another girl and betray her despite the relationship they had because of either one false rumor, a lie, a boy, or even because they meet other people. It is very difficult for girls to find the right friends for her. It may be something we can all relate too. If not we must consider these things when we see a girl having troubles or when they are doing great with others because at any moment the situation may change completely for either girl. This is a great book that I would recommend.

[Anni · Rating 5 out of 5]

The odd girl? Who's that? The second book that I read over the summer was "Odd girl speaks out" by Rachel Simmons.I am at a loss of words. This book was astounding. It voiced an opinion that really connected to the reader. Which so happened to be me. Hundreds of girls all over the world put together one single book.They gathered their life changing experiences and put it into multiple short stories. The stories written and compiled covered topics such as bullies,cliques,popularity etc. I loved the perspective this book was written in. First person. The emotions, thoughts the actions were told by the person who lived them spoke them and felt them thus creating a whole different experience for the reader. I would 1000000000000% (I know your counting the zero's) recommend this book to everyone. To be honest my initial reaction to this book was "Its probably going to be an OK book"Never would I have thought that I would want to read it again and again. Now you definitely have to read this book!

[Rachael · Rating 5 out of 5]

this book was a good book because it talks a lot about life and how situations impacted lives from bullying and what the right thing is to do in these cases. Also, this book had good advice throughout friendships.

[Sharon · Rating 4 out of 5]

I truly wish this book had been written when I was still at school. Simmons has girls, both victims and bullies, write about their experiences in dealing with the natural emotions of aggression, anger and disappointment while growing up. I wish that every parent who dismisses their child being bullied with the phrase "they're just jealous" would read this as well, because Simmons explains why that attitude does nothing to help the situation. The entries from girls who were bullies were particularly enlightening, as oftentimes these girls did not see that they did anything wrong, and even had parental support for their behavior toward the "weird" or "different" girl. Concrete recommendations for dealing with bullying are interspersed throughout the book. It was a quick read, coming in at about 150 pages. May be triggering for those who had a difficult time as victims of bullies.

[Lindsey Young · Rating 4 out of 5]

Odd Girl Speaks Out is about girls telling about when they got bullied, cliques, popularity, and jealousy. They write about what they did when this was all happening and it talks about what they should have done. I think this is a good book for teen aged girls that are getting bullied or having a hard time in and out of school because if you read this then you know that you aren’t the only one that is having a problem with this type of stuff. I think that if you are a teen-aged girl and you are having problems with getting bullied, cliques, popularity, and jealousy then you should read this book so you know what other people have been through. This isn’t a book that I would normally read but I am happy that I read it so I know what other people are going through so I can talk to them and get to know them better and maybe you can make a new friend.

[Kendall · Rating 4 out of 5]

“Odd Girl Speaks Out” explores the interrelationship between anger, girls and culture. Simmons notes how culture dismisses female aggression, as “girls will be girls.” She claims girls generally feel they must be nice to everyone, often resulting in indirect aggression as how to express feelings. She discusses different types of indirect aggression like the silent treatment, ganging up, threatening to end friendships, and the Internet. Simmons says girls who do not express their feelings often develop eating disorders, become depressed, or start cutting themselves. She collected stories from girls victimized by other girls. In between these stories, readers find advice on what to do when feeling left out, as well as how to work through other conflicts.

[Pam · Rating 5 out of 5]

I used this book in my granddaughter's Girl Scout troop (11 and 12 year olds) to stimulate discussion about their own issues with bullying and gossip. And it did! Girls who did not typically participate related to these stories and wanted to talk about how they were ridiculed for being different in ways that middle school girls are: too smart, likes science, no boobs, boobs too big, friends one day and not the next.

An excellent collection of short stories, written by girls for girls, that can help all young girls understand that they are not alone in this journey of growing up. But, most importantly, it will stimulate real thinking (at least for a bit) about how giggling in a group can make one girl feel miserable for longer than that few minutes in the lunchroom.

[Lena · Rating 3 out of 5]

in this book teenage girls write about their experiences with bullying and cliques. one of the problems i found was that a lot of the stories were really similar, this made the book slightly repeditive. its amazing how so many people can experience the same thing, but everyone has a slightly different reaction. it surprised me that a lot of the victims were really nice people and the bullys took advatidge of their kindness. its really sad to hear how many people do this. i would totally recommend this book, especially people who love non-fiction and real stuff.

[Jessica]

Rachel Simmons,who is the author of Odd Girl Speaks Out,has created a quiet character,who talks about highschool in a scary way. A picked on girl, who is a student at a large school, has put up with the cruelty of high school girls. Taking the builying that is taking place every day.Speaks Out progress about problems and how to put up with the cruelty of teenage girls.I enjoyed this easy book because the stories I know if it ever happens to me then I will know what to do in situations. If you are a fan of Chicken For Soup For The Teenage Soul this is the book for you.

[Jen · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not as good as The Fat Boy Chronicles, the other book assigned to faculty this summer. I appreciate that the teen girls wrote these pieces themselves, but reading teen girl melodrama and poor writing gets so tedious I start to not care about their truly difficult or sad situations. The Fat Boy Chronicles were a fictionalized account written by seasoned writers -- but inspired by an actual teen boy's story -- so much more effective.

[Erika · Rating 4 out of 5]

A fascinating take on the bullying and "mean girl" stuff that goes on during the middle childhood years. The stories were taken from the girls' mouths, and the group of girls included those who were bullied and those who were bullies. I definitely have a different perspective on the "popular" girls in my middle and high school. I'm also really glad that I'm not in middle school now and that most adults grow past these ineffective methods of handling conflicts and uncomfortable feelings.

[Mr. Reckord :D · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read this book for my Women's History month reading assignment. It took me several books to find the right one... but this was definately a good choice. Its kind of like the Chicken Soup books, but different. I thought it was really good. Its all stories about bullying, jealousy, and revenge. It shows you that you aren't the only one with issues in school. I really enjoyed reading it.

[Shannon · Rating 4 out of 5]

I actually feel bad saying that I enjoyed this book since it is about such a horrible topic- girls' bullying. But it was recommended to me by a friend and I am glad that I read it. It is a compilation of stories from various young girls (in their own words) about their experiences with bullying. It was not a pleasant read, but as the mother of a young girl, it was an eye opener.

[Ashley hawkins · Rating 5 out of 5]

i thought this book was great for kids our age because it teaches us that bullying hurts and saying some little mean thing everyday to a person can really mess up their life in big ways like social and emotional ways.This was a sad book but it taught why to not bully or harm people because it scars them for life.:(

[Cassandra Javier · Rating 3 out of 5]

If you've ever been (and if you are) an odd girl out, then this book is for you. you'd laugh, cry, and be inspired by this real-life stories of struggle, fitting-in, and survival--and most importantly, of hope: That you're not alone, that it's okay to be yourself, that it's not just you. Some pieces are so heartfelt that you'd feel for the writers.

[Sarah Vecchi · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'd almost like to use this book to lead a discussion group with my middle school female students. It has such great insights into female aggression that isn't given a healthy and viable outlet in our culture and how girls without communication skills can be terribly cruel to one another, or feel all alone. Really good.

[Mary · Rating 4 out of 5]

It's difficult for me to say I "liked" this book because reading it was a truly searing experience. It brought back a lot of unhappy memories of middle school for me. If you were bullied in school or have a daughter who is feeling like the "odd girl out," this is essential reading, for you and for her.

[Christine · Rating 3 out of 5]

As a parent, I read this book in order to help my own daughters. The stories took me back to my own struggles in middle school. Everything I went through helped make me who I am, but I want my daughters to be better prepared for how mean girls can be.

[Vanessa · Rating 3 out of 5]

Utterly horrible sympathetic feeling toward uneducated kids with the lack of essential parenting within watch, results in innocent being mental damaged that could potentially dragging for life, and not mentioned the worse case scenario that leading regrettable suicidal sorrow.

[Jewelz · Rating 5 out of 5]

for women or girls who feels out of place!!

So far it is really good and i read things in here where i was once or twice!

[Michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

Again - another look at the girl sub-culture, but this time from the girl's point of view. Interesting.

[Holli · Rating 3 out of 5]

Collection of true stories of young girls in school who are either bullied or are bullies.