'Strip Tease' is definitely my most favorite novel of those I've read written by Carl Hiaasen! What a rollicking book of ridiculous villains, high-spirited dames and silly state officials! Florida has never appealed to me much, but Hiaasen actually manages to make of it a lovable state! Sort of.
Erin Grant fell in love and married Darrell Grant. This has turned out to be the worst mistake of her life. Darrell is a drug addict and a criminal, but by the time Erin realized it, she was pregnant with the now 4-year-old Angela. She lost custody of the little girl in the divorce because Darrell became a police snitch. The police subsequently decided to erase his felonies from the computer; and the bible-thumping evangelical judge ruled that her job as a stripper, which she took up to pay her divorce lawyers, made her an unfit mother. Sadly, she continues to dance and strip, saving her tips, hoping for another custody trial. Since she is a mother, she ONLY dances and strips. The other dancers, who are entertaining characters in every sense, think she is missing opportunities for making real money.
One night at the club, called the Eager Beaver, the judge who refused Erin custody of her daughter, and another lovesick little man who the strippers nicknamed Mr. Peepers, and a drunken party of young men out celebrating because one of them, Paul Gruber, was getting married the next day, were all in the club watching the dancers. Paul crawls onto the stage and hugs Erin, the last dancer for the night. He absolutely refuses to let go. Shad the bouncer had left the club for a minute, and the owner, Orly, was in his office. Suddenly, a really strange man jumps onto the stage and begins beating Paul on the head with a liquor bottle until it shatters. Paul is taken to the hospital, and the man who viciously attacked him is pulled out of the club by another unknown man. The two nasties disappear into a limousine.
If Mr. Peepers, or actually, Jerry Killian, hadn't decided to take pictures of the incident, and if the violent man hadn't been the United States Florida Congressman, and secretly a perverted sex-addict, Dave Dilbeck, or as his fixer, Malcolm 'Moldie' Moldowsky, calls him, "a card-carrying shithead", the story would have ended there. But Jerry Killian has a crush on Erin, and so he decides to help her by blackmailing the Congressman with the photos to force Dilbeck to put pressure on the religious divorce judge, who also loves the dancers too, but biblically, of course.
Dilbeck receives millions of dollars from the sugar cane producers of Florida, and an important farm support bill is soon to be up for a vote. It is essential no scandal erupt before that vote, so Moldie decides to 'fix' Mr. Peepers. By the wildest coincidence, a Florida police detective, Al García, finds Killian in a very peculiar circumstance, and even though it isn't his case, decides to find out who wanted to kill Killian and why.
Erin, meanwhile, is trying to find where Darrell has hidden her daughter, again, so she has gone to Darrell's sister's home. Rita Grant raises 'gentle pet' wolves to sell, so visiting Rita is a challenge. Even Rita finds the baby wolves a bit of a challenge - she wears a catcher's mask and logging gloves to feed them. Angela is frequently left at Rita's by Darrell, but this time Rita explains Darrell has decided to use the girl to steal wheelchairs to sell for cash from hospitals, by pretending Angela is sick and wheeling her out in the wheelchair. Erin knows if Darrell is arrested, they both will lose custody!
Believe it or not, things actually begin to spin even more out of control, especially when Dilbeck decides to go back to the club against strict orders because he has fallen in love with Erin. One of the other dancer's snakes disappears. Orly wants to put in a lady-wrestling arena to defeat the competition down the street, who is stealing the Eager Beaver's dancers with offers of more tips from more customers. Then, lawyers start showing up...and there is still 2/3 of the book to go!
Lots of jokes, pratfalls, illegal schemes, devious plots, and a psychopath or two, not counting the snakes! Delightful disasters abound and rebound! I truly hated turning the last page!