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Protocol: The Handbook for the Female Slave
Protocols have to be desigend by each Master for his/her slave. Protocols are what makes a relationship special. This book is intended to provide examples, ideas and discussion points to those who follow - or would like to follow - the calling to live in a modern-day Master/slave Leather relationship.
182 pages, Paperback
First published April 1, 2006
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Displaying 1 - 13 of 13 reviews
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August 28, 2013Has very good information about how this couple uses protocols in their relationship. As the author eluded to in the book: What works for them most likely will not work for any other couple because each relationship is unique.
April 1, 2013
Lyndsey and I use this as a reference when discussing protocols at MaST meetings.
August 9, 2023
Definitely one that left me with some strong opinions. I think it might have benefited from a slightly different title, like "The Handbook for MY Female Slave." A solid 50% of the book is focused on dinner etiquette and housekeeping, and I do wish I'd just skipped it. The other half had some interesting perspectives and ideas on ritual and agreement that honestly feel practical even outside of a D/s dynamic. You absolutely have to approach this knowing in advance it's older and written for a heteronormative audience, or else some of the perspectives will not go down nearly as smoothly.
June 17, 2020
Interesting. Some new information. Didn't know there was different paths in bdsm. Not all things applicable for everyone but that's intentional.
July 31, 2010
Protocols: Handbook for the female slave by Robert J. Rubel. ISBN 978-1887895125
Reviewed by Chris Phillips
This book is specifically applicable to persons engaged in or considering an informed, mutually consenting Master/slave (M/s) relationship. For those reading this that are outside of the Bondage Domination Sado-Masochism (BDSM) community the book provides a practioner’s view of how this dynamic is lived. For readers who are part of the BDSM community, this provides practical and personal guidelines in constructing and maintaining a vital M/s relationship.
Rubel defines his terms in the introduction and provides enough background to lay a solid groundwork. Rubel states, “This book is my personal Manual of Protocol for my slave.” (pg. 19) This manual provides the basis for the book. Rubel’s comments, introduction, appendices and reference materials add more body to form the remainder of the book.
Terms such as protocols, contracts, and rituals are clearly defined in the Introduction.
“Protocols represent a set of rules that govern specific actions or behavior in a particular situation. So, there is a ‘lockdown protocol’ in prison and a ‘test-taking protocol’ in the boarding school.” (pg 22)
Dealing with the Master-slave dynamic as a viable and vital relationship dynamic in modern society, Rubel proceeds in detail to describe his current relationship and how that can be applied to others’ lives. He defines the relationship between himself and his slave. He elucidates how these protocols are implemented and what the consequences are for failure but only as part of the commentary. Protocols and this book are specifically designed to guide a slave’s behavior in service to her Master.
One common thread is communication. Rubel sets the stage in chapter 3, but visible throughout.
“Issues of Communication
Courtesies and conversations often rely on tact. Tact is the talent for not saying that you were right in the first place. In our Family, we are not interested in affixing blame, we are interested in developing rich, harmonious relationships. The relevant aphorism is: ‘We’re not put on this earth to see through one another, but to see one another through.’” (pg 59)
His comments show insights into the details of working out his current relationship.
The chapters follow in logical order and increasing complexity. Rubel includes ample details to ensure that there is understanding although the sheer quantity of detail may leave some readers feeling overwhelmed. In the appendices, Rubel includes an example of a training contract, important safety information, forms and resources that are mentioned in the book, and references for further study. Rubel includes URLs for Leather conferences and events, which often provide more classes and presentations.
Rubel provides insight into the “power exchange,” “authority exchange,” and the Leather community as a subset within the overall BDSM community. Rubel contends there is sufficient distinction between Leather M/s and BDSM M/s for this book about Leather M/s High Protocol. The distinction Rubel espouses is a spiritual component not present to the same degree in other BDSM relationships. Quoting Master Skip Chasey and Master Steve Sampson, he states that the Top/bottom relationship is sexual, the Dominant/submissive is mental or about energy and the Master/slave is spiritual. The practical application illustrates that any portion can be adapted without demanding the strictness and structure of Rubel’s personal relationship.
Writing in the first person conversational tone, Rubel lends a personal touch to the book. This allows him to express his “commentaries” which explain the reasoning behind the protocol as well as important details of difficulties or unexpected twists that occurred in the writing of this book.
This book is an excellent source for those in or considering a Master-slave dynamic. It should be of interest to anyone that is part of the BDSM or Kink community. Family and friends of those in the community would also benefit from Rubel’s insights.
Reviewed by Chris Phillips
This book is specifically applicable to persons engaged in or considering an informed, mutually consenting Master/slave (M/s) relationship. For those reading this that are outside of the Bondage Domination Sado-Masochism (BDSM) community the book provides a practioner’s view of how this dynamic is lived. For readers who are part of the BDSM community, this provides practical and personal guidelines in constructing and maintaining a vital M/s relationship.
Rubel defines his terms in the introduction and provides enough background to lay a solid groundwork. Rubel states, “This book is my personal Manual of Protocol for my slave.” (pg. 19) This manual provides the basis for the book. Rubel’s comments, introduction, appendices and reference materials add more body to form the remainder of the book.
Terms such as protocols, contracts, and rituals are clearly defined in the Introduction.
“Protocols represent a set of rules that govern specific actions or behavior in a particular situation. So, there is a ‘lockdown protocol’ in prison and a ‘test-taking protocol’ in the boarding school.” (pg 22)
Dealing with the Master-slave dynamic as a viable and vital relationship dynamic in modern society, Rubel proceeds in detail to describe his current relationship and how that can be applied to others’ lives. He defines the relationship between himself and his slave. He elucidates how these protocols are implemented and what the consequences are for failure but only as part of the commentary. Protocols and this book are specifically designed to guide a slave’s behavior in service to her Master.
One common thread is communication. Rubel sets the stage in chapter 3, but visible throughout.
“Issues of Communication
Courtesies and conversations often rely on tact. Tact is the talent for not saying that you were right in the first place. In our Family, we are not interested in affixing blame, we are interested in developing rich, harmonious relationships. The relevant aphorism is: ‘We’re not put on this earth to see through one another, but to see one another through.’” (pg 59)
His comments show insights into the details of working out his current relationship.
The chapters follow in logical order and increasing complexity. Rubel includes ample details to ensure that there is understanding although the sheer quantity of detail may leave some readers feeling overwhelmed. In the appendices, Rubel includes an example of a training contract, important safety information, forms and resources that are mentioned in the book, and references for further study. Rubel includes URLs for Leather conferences and events, which often provide more classes and presentations.
Rubel provides insight into the “power exchange,” “authority exchange,” and the Leather community as a subset within the overall BDSM community. Rubel contends there is sufficient distinction between Leather M/s and BDSM M/s for this book about Leather M/s High Protocol. The distinction Rubel espouses is a spiritual component not present to the same degree in other BDSM relationships. Quoting Master Skip Chasey and Master Steve Sampson, he states that the Top/bottom relationship is sexual, the Dominant/submissive is mental or about energy and the Master/slave is spiritual. The practical application illustrates that any portion can be adapted without demanding the strictness and structure of Rubel’s personal relationship.
Writing in the first person conversational tone, Rubel lends a personal touch to the book. This allows him to express his “commentaries” which explain the reasoning behind the protocol as well as important details of difficulties or unexpected twists that occurred in the writing of this book.
This book is an excellent source for those in or considering a Master-slave dynamic. It should be of interest to anyone that is part of the BDSM or Kink community. Family and friends of those in the community would also benefit from Rubel’s insights.
June 15, 2018
This is a great book to get a better understanding on bdsm and just how far people can take it. It is quite eye opening to read. Despite this sort of lifestyle being extreme for me personally, there are many parts that I'd like to incorporate and try out.
I would like to point out that Dr. Rubel can come off as a bit of an elitist within this book. In some parts of the book, it seems as if he thinks he is above those that are not into bdsm or carry a D/s relationship. Something to be wary about.
This book is also dated, so the resources in the back may not work or require some googling.
All in all, definitely a book I would reread over every once in awhile and reference from. At the time of writing this, I just wish that it was offered on the Kindle instead of a physical copy.
I would like to point out that Dr. Rubel can come off as a bit of an elitist within this book. In some parts of the book, it seems as if he thinks he is above those that are not into bdsm or carry a D/s relationship. Something to be wary about.
This book is also dated, so the resources in the back may not work or require some googling.
All in all, definitely a book I would reread over every once in awhile and reference from. At the time of writing this, I just wish that it was offered on the Kindle instead of a physical copy.
March 14, 2012
Wonderfully written from the Master (male) / slave (female) perspective.
I especially like how the author has given us a glimpse into how his actual M/s dynamic is set up, as the book was intended to serve solely as a guidebook for his slave.
Fortunately for the rest of us he decided to publish it so that we may all benefit from it.
I especially like how the author has given us a glimpse into how his actual M/s dynamic is set up, as the book was intended to serve solely as a guidebook for his slave.
Fortunately for the rest of us he decided to publish it so that we may all benefit from it.
November 20, 2014
The National Leather Association International (NLA-I) awarded the 2008 honorable mention for the Geoff Mains Non-fiction Book Award to Vincent Andrews for The Leatherboy Handbook (Nazca Plains), a detailed guide to the boy subculture.
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March 26, 2023This book has under the current ISBN is no longer in print. The Author has changed publishers and the new title is "The Complete Leatherboy Handbook". It contains the same content, with expansion on some chapters.
October 22, 2012
Honestly very interesting but repetitive.
June 25, 2014
This book is NOT written by Vincent Andrews. Whoever made this entry, did so incorrectly.
September 12, 2017
This is a good book regarding BDSM protocols. It is in-depth, and i learned a lot of information.
Displaying 1 - 13 of 13 reviews