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Bengali Girls Don’t: Based on a True Story
Based on a True Story:
Born in a remote village during her country's liberation war, a Bangladeshi girl moves to England with her parents and struggles for freedom and identity while growing up in a mixed neighborhood. Caught between the world of her white friends and that of her parents, she scraps her Muslim gear for blue jeans and runs away with her boyfriend.
But when her father tracks her down and finds her, he tricks her into going to Bangladesh so that he can marry her off.
In Bangladesh, she is faced with a choice: get married or never go home.
It's an unforgettable true story about heartache and irony. About broken dreams. And how the life we choose is not always the life that chooses us.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
L.A. Sherman grew up in Bradford, England where she learned how to sneak out of the house without making the door creak. At the age of fifteen, she was tricked into going to Bangladesh by her parents and forced to marry a man as old as her father. After four years there with a wicked mother-in-law, she won the visa lottery for America and moved to the Big Apple. Now hard at work on her second book, she lives in Tampa, Florida with her family near a pond full of gators and spends her time doing all the things that Bengali girls don't.
Born in a remote village during her country's liberation war, a Bangladeshi girl moves to England with her parents and struggles for freedom and identity while growing up in a mixed neighborhood. Caught between the world of her white friends and that of her parents, she scraps her Muslim gear for blue jeans and runs away with her boyfriend.
But when her father tracks her down and finds her, he tricks her into going to Bangladesh so that he can marry her off.
In Bangladesh, she is faced with a choice: get married or never go home.
It's an unforgettable true story about heartache and irony. About broken dreams. And how the life we choose is not always the life that chooses us.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
L.A. Sherman grew up in Bradford, England where she learned how to sneak out of the house without making the door creak. At the age of fifteen, she was tricked into going to Bangladesh by her parents and forced to marry a man as old as her father. After four years there with a wicked mother-in-law, she won the visa lottery for America and moved to the Big Apple. Now hard at work on her second book, she lives in Tampa, Florida with her family near a pond full of gators and spends her time doing all the things that Bengali girls don't.
435 pages, Kindle Edition
First published September 13, 2011
89 people are currently reading
291 people want to read
About the author
L.A. Sherman
8 books44 followersL.A. Sherman grew up in Bradford, England in a strict Muslim family where she learned how to sneak out of the house without making the door creak. At the age of fifteen, she was tricked into going to Bangladesh by her parents and forced to marry a man as old as her father. After four years there with a wicked mother-in-law, she won the visa lottery for America and moved to the Big Apple. Now hard at work on her second book, she lives in Tampa, Florida with her family near a pond full of gators and spends her time doing all the things that Bengali girls don't.
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 34 reviews
August 31, 2016
Disclaimer: I received a free copy of this book in exchange for an honest review
LA Sherman's Bengali Girl's Don't is one of the best books I've read this year. It's beautiful, lyrical and full of fantastic insight into the experience of Muslim children raised in Western societies. Sherman's writing is full of depth and beauty, pulling us into the world of the main character: Luky. I am reminded of What the Body Remembers by Shauna Singh Baldwin for it's raw intimacy and multi-generational/cultural storyline.
Bengali Girl's Don't is written in third person memoir style and the first half of it is exquisite, full of details from Bangladeshi life that resonate with the reader no matter your personal cultural history. Rahman and Sunia (Luky's parents) live through the revolution and partition of Bengladesh from Pakistan. The personal and political details included in the story make it rich and vibrant. An absolute joy to read.
Rahman and Sunia take their sons (I'm not sure how many, as one of them inexplicably seemed to have two names: Pilton and Saqir) and daughter to England, where Sunia gives birth to a number of daughters. Rahman and Sunia try desperately to raise their children as proper Muslims and Bengalis In their own way it's clear their intentions are good and they wish good things for their children. Cultural standards, aspirations for popularity and the crushing pressure of being the eldest daughter push Luky to a breaking point. Desperate for freedom and individuality, she seeks a reprieve from her parents strictness and abuse in a series of ill fated romantic entanglements. Finally, at only 15, her parents take her to Bangladesh where she is manipulated into an arranged marriage.
Unfortunately it doesn't seem that Sherman invested in an editor or had much outside help with this project, because despite vast amounts of raw talent much of this book is a hot mess. For example, there's a chapter where Luky's younger sister Salena is kidnapped from their home by Jamaican men, but then in the next chapter Salena is in the living room and no mention of the incident is ever made again.
I'm also unclear about the end of the book. It appears that Luky and her husband Hash'nuq leave Bengladesh for America, although this part of the book becomes so disjoined and confessional, its difficult to wade through the facts.
In addition to that, there's also the issue of inconsistent tense and writing style changes. Most of the book is in third person, however, periodically, and without warning, the reader is thrust into first person asides. It seemed at first that these asides were always placed in italics, but by the end of the book the regular prose had shifted, inexplicably, to first person. Also, there are what appear to be transcripts from conversation with a therapist interspersed in the text and even theatre style dialogue without descriptions for no apparent reason.
The use of these conventions is interesting and not necessarily a problem. I am reminded of Becoming Madame Mao by Anchee Min and how the book is separated by font and italics between letters, fiction and biographical narrative. With proper editing and story construction, Sherman's desire to write in this way could be a tremendous asset. It gives the book an unexpected depth that pulls the reader in further. Unfortunately, as it stands the reader is thrust into these segments with no warning, mid chapter and often without context.
Sherman's stream of consciousness writing is a delight to read and I sat, mesmerised by the story unfolding before me. Despite problems with the manuscript which, in a lesser book, would have me crying foul, I read the entire thing (that's 426 pages) in one sitting. As much as I recommend this book, and I do, I have to warn readers to not get your hopes too high for a final product. This is a brilliant draft of a potentially world class book. I only hope LA Serman takes the time to massage it into the literature it deserves to be.
LA Sherman's Bengali Girl's Don't is one of the best books I've read this year. It's beautiful, lyrical and full of fantastic insight into the experience of Muslim children raised in Western societies. Sherman's writing is full of depth and beauty, pulling us into the world of the main character: Luky. I am reminded of What the Body Remembers by Shauna Singh Baldwin for it's raw intimacy and multi-generational/cultural storyline.
Bengali Girl's Don't is written in third person memoir style and the first half of it is exquisite, full of details from Bangladeshi life that resonate with the reader no matter your personal cultural history. Rahman and Sunia (Luky's parents) live through the revolution and partition of Bengladesh from Pakistan. The personal and political details included in the story make it rich and vibrant. An absolute joy to read.
Rahman and Sunia take their sons (I'm not sure how many, as one of them inexplicably seemed to have two names: Pilton and Saqir) and daughter to England, where Sunia gives birth to a number of daughters. Rahman and Sunia try desperately to raise their children as proper Muslims and Bengalis In their own way it's clear their intentions are good and they wish good things for their children. Cultural standards, aspirations for popularity and the crushing pressure of being the eldest daughter push Luky to a breaking point. Desperate for freedom and individuality, she seeks a reprieve from her parents strictness and abuse in a series of ill fated romantic entanglements. Finally, at only 15, her parents take her to Bangladesh where she is manipulated into an arranged marriage.
Unfortunately it doesn't seem that Sherman invested in an editor or had much outside help with this project, because despite vast amounts of raw talent much of this book is a hot mess. For example, there's a chapter where Luky's younger sister Salena is kidnapped from their home by Jamaican men, but then in the next chapter Salena is in the living room and no mention of the incident is ever made again.
I'm also unclear about the end of the book. It appears that Luky and her husband Hash'nuq leave Bengladesh for America, although this part of the book becomes so disjoined and confessional, its difficult to wade through the facts.
In addition to that, there's also the issue of inconsistent tense and writing style changes. Most of the book is in third person, however, periodically, and without warning, the reader is thrust into first person asides. It seemed at first that these asides were always placed in italics, but by the end of the book the regular prose had shifted, inexplicably, to first person. Also, there are what appear to be transcripts from conversation with a therapist interspersed in the text and even theatre style dialogue without descriptions for no apparent reason.
The use of these conventions is interesting and not necessarily a problem. I am reminded of Becoming Madame Mao by Anchee Min and how the book is separated by font and italics between letters, fiction and biographical narrative. With proper editing and story construction, Sherman's desire to write in this way could be a tremendous asset. It gives the book an unexpected depth that pulls the reader in further. Unfortunately, as it stands the reader is thrust into these segments with no warning, mid chapter and often without context.
Sherman's stream of consciousness writing is a delight to read and I sat, mesmerised by the story unfolding before me. Despite problems with the manuscript which, in a lesser book, would have me crying foul, I read the entire thing (that's 426 pages) in one sitting. As much as I recommend this book, and I do, I have to warn readers to not get your hopes too high for a final product. This is a brilliant draft of a potentially world class book. I only hope LA Serman takes the time to massage it into the literature it deserves to be.
February 18, 2015
I think the subject matter was really profound and I kept reading because I wanted to see how it all unfolded. It is a memoir that reads like someone with a multiple personality disorder is sitting on your couch, telling you a story. If the author's intent was to make you feel like that--it was achieved. It isn't a book that you become immersed in. Like a telephone conversation that drags on a little too long, so does the story.
If the accounts of the book are true (and I have no reason to believe they aren't), it fails in creating sympathy and engaging the reader to the author's story. As our protagonist, she comes off as petulant and high-strung. As sad as the circumstances are, if a reader doesn't like the protagonist you aren't going to rally them to your side. This is what happened here for me.
Unfortunately, this book is also in desperate need of editing. It is chock-a-block full of grammatical and spelling errors and the dialogue is choppy. There's no flow to it at all.
I think the story held promise but would've been better received with a significantly more polished author.
If the accounts of the book are true (and I have no reason to believe they aren't), it fails in creating sympathy and engaging the reader to the author's story. As our protagonist, she comes off as petulant and high-strung. As sad as the circumstances are, if a reader doesn't like the protagonist you aren't going to rally them to your side. This is what happened here for me.
Unfortunately, this book is also in desperate need of editing. It is chock-a-block full of grammatical and spelling errors and the dialogue is choppy. There's no flow to it at all.
I think the story held promise but would've been better received with a significantly more polished author.
December 7, 2011
A fascinating autobiography that begins in East Pakistan, soon to be Bangaladesh, as the author's parents flee before the military purge instigated by General Yahya Khan. We are then taken on a journey that clearly shows the contrasts between Western and Eastern cultures, as the author lived through them growing up in Bradford, England; having to balance her parents' traditions against her own desire to fit in with the culture of the country she considered to be her home. The racism and distrust displayed by people from both cultures is very stark at times and there are disturbing scenes of violence when the invisible lines between the two are seen to be crossed. This leads on to the section of the biography dealing with the author's enforced marriage which reads like a waking nightmare in places and reminded me very much of Sylvia Plath's poem 'Purdah' - a woman raging and hurting because she has been trapped by others into their shadow, never allowed to breathe and just be herself. As much as this biography deals with cultural clashes as well as abusive repression and subjugation, it is also very illuminating with regard to Muslim and Bengali culture. I applaud the author for including sections of dialogue in Bengali with appropriate English translations as opposed to presenting all of the dialogue in English. As a reader, I found it gave a greater sense of the people being portrayed, as certain phrases became familiar and understanding of their meaning and use evolved throughout the narrative. The lighter moments of this sometimes harrowing account are also owed to these sections of dialogue, I think, as we see the affection and love that is contained in a single turn of phrase or a nickname.
Recommended.
Recommended.
April 13, 2013
Bengali Girls Don't is the true story about the author L.A. Sherman. Born in Bangladesh, she moves to England with her parents and siblings where she struggles with growing up in a Bengali household and wanting the freedom all her English friends have. At the age of 15, after running away from home, her parents trick her to going to Bangladesh where she is forced to get married.
I bought this Kindle book almost a year ago for 77p. It interested me because my boyfriend is from Bangladesh. I thought her story was fascinating and it could have been amazing if it were written properly.
There were so many things I didn't like. The style of writing was terrible. The author kept on jumping around. There was a really interesting part where her younger sister gets kidnapped my Jamaicans and then it just ends. It was never referred to again and the story continues sometime after. This happens a couple of times in the book which is incredibly frustrating. The story is literally all over the place. Then there were times where there's a transcript of the author answering questions from someone. From who? I do not know as it was never stated. Although the story is real, I never felt much sympathy for her. She was sneaking out, stealing, smoking and much more so I didn't feel heartbroken when she went off to Bangladesh as she more-or-less had it coming. Of course she didn't deserve to be forced into marriage and treated like a slave but it seems like her parents had no choice. Another thing I hated was that sometimes instead of writing 'you' she would write 'u'. I'm not sure if that was on purpose or just laziness. There were also parts where the language was just crude and unnecessary. I really wanted to like this book.
I bought this Kindle book almost a year ago for 77p. It interested me because my boyfriend is from Bangladesh. I thought her story was fascinating and it could have been amazing if it were written properly.
There were so many things I didn't like. The style of writing was terrible. The author kept on jumping around. There was a really interesting part where her younger sister gets kidnapped my Jamaicans and then it just ends. It was never referred to again and the story continues sometime after. This happens a couple of times in the book which is incredibly frustrating. The story is literally all over the place. Then there were times where there's a transcript of the author answering questions from someone. From who? I do not know as it was never stated. Although the story is real, I never felt much sympathy for her. She was sneaking out, stealing, smoking and much more so I didn't feel heartbroken when she went off to Bangladesh as she more-or-less had it coming. Of course she didn't deserve to be forced into marriage and treated like a slave but it seems like her parents had no choice. Another thing I hated was that sometimes instead of writing 'you' she would write 'u'. I'm not sure if that was on purpose or just laziness. There were also parts where the language was just crude and unnecessary. I really wanted to like this book.
August 11, 2016
I had a tough time with this book because it was a memoir, but it was written mostly in third person. Also, about halfway through the book, the author started putting what seemed like a conversation with a therapist describing what happened and these sections were written in first person, which totally messed up the flow of the book. I also didn't like the ending where the author jumped forward and gave a very confusing explanation for why she wanted to divorce the husband that only pages before appeared to be her refuge from his overbearing family.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
July 2, 2015
Very engaging plot and interesting story.
However, the style kept jumping around and it was a bit disorienting (back and forth in time, from a therapist couch dialogue to stage directions, etc.) and unfortunately some typos remain as well. But a good story and with some editing and work could be really great.
However, the style kept jumping around and it was a bit disorienting (back and forth in time, from a therapist couch dialogue to stage directions, etc.) and unfortunately some typos remain as well. But a good story and with some editing and work could be really great.
November 16, 2011
Amazing and inspiring story of a lovely woman who was able to triumph over adversity. In spite of the odds and even her own family turned against her Luky (pronounced Lucky) fought back for what she thought was rightfully hers. Her freedom.
November 10, 2012
This may be the worst book I've ever read. It's unfortunate as it had the potential to be fascinating, but it's so poorly written, it's a pain. She needs a good editor as her story is actually interesting, it's just all over the place.
May 19, 2018
Average Book
The story is nice especially that it is based on a real story.
But the writing style could be ameliorated.
The story is nice especially that it is based on a real story.
But the writing style could be ameliorated.
July 31, 2020
Valuable source material for the sociologist or anthropologist, it's a very real look into the life of a woman in a culture where children and women are property. The writing, while at times very lyrical, is extremely rough and marked by the fact that the author is exactly the person she portrays, a smart girl who was minimally educated, who was more interested in escaping the rigid, controlling culture she was born into than she was in her education, and who failed to escape until a great many years had passed and is at last living the life she always wanted, where she can dress how she likes and not spend all her time slaving (quite literally) away for others.
October 13, 2020
Super easy to read- I finished it in a sitting. It's not a fabulous work of fine literature, but very interesting to learn about her first marriage and how it all was a surprise to her. It was also entertaining to read about her family's escape from a war torn nation, only for her to return there, to a village still stuck in some very old ways. There was a happy ending, which was nice. This is a fun beach or rainy day read, but nothing to write home about.
August 30, 2020
Tripe
Tripe and more tripe,no wonder they come over here,in the droves then one,of them tells her daughter,don’t play on skates
it’s only white daughters do that,what’s wrong with skates,
I cant say anything else.
Nellie
Tripe and more tripe,no wonder they come over here,in the droves then one,of them tells her daughter,don’t play on skates
it’s only white daughters do that,what’s wrong with skates,
I cant say anything else.
Nellie
January 12, 2018
Amazing!
Very very well written. It’s like you are there with the author throughout her life story. I just wanted to shout for joy at the new beginning she got!
Very very well written. It’s like you are there with the author throughout her life story. I just wanted to shout for joy at the new beginning she got!
April 4, 2024
Good read
I found it a bit confusing at times but it’s definitely worth a read. Strong minded young woman, I glad you find your way out of adversity.
I found it a bit confusing at times but it’s definitely worth a read. Strong minded young woman, I glad you find your way out of adversity.
February 18, 2015
I think the subject matter was really profound and I kept reading because I wanted to see how it all unfolded. It is a memoir that reads like someone with a multiple personality disorder is sitting on your couch, telling you a story. If the author's intent was to make you feel like that--it was achieved. It isn't a book that you become immersed in. Like a telephone conversation that drags on a little too long, so does the story.
If the accounts of the book are true (and I have no reason to believe they aren't), it fails in creating sympathy and engaging the reader to the author's story. As our protagonist, she comes off as petulant and high-strung. As sad as the circumstances are, if a reader doesn't like the protagonist you aren't going to rally them to your side. This is what happened here for me.
Unfortunately, this book is also in desperate need of editing. It is chock-a-block full of grammatical and spelling errors and the dialogue is choppy. There's no flow to it at all.
I think the story held promise but would've been better received with a significantly more polished author.
If the accounts of the book are true (and I have no reason to believe they aren't), it fails in creating sympathy and engaging the reader to the author's story. As our protagonist, she comes off as petulant and high-strung. As sad as the circumstances are, if a reader doesn't like the protagonist you aren't going to rally them to your side. This is what happened here for me.
Unfortunately, this book is also in desperate need of editing. It is chock-a-block full of grammatical and spelling errors and the dialogue is choppy. There's no flow to it at all.
I think the story held promise but would've been better received with a significantly more polished author.
March 6, 2012
This is a memoir about Luky, a girl from Bangladesh whose strict Muslim family moves to England when she's a young girl. The story itself is quite interesting but I didn't care much for the writing style. It was very disjointed, moving from first to third person, then to a question and answer section (Who's asking the questions? The reader? A therapist? I don't know), then it's straight into a dream... and back to first person or third or whatever! I also had a difficult time with the grammatical errors and ESPECIALLY -- for a page or two (read on my Kindle so I'm not sure exactly), she spells as though she's texting. "U", "ur", etc. I would not have been able to finish the book had it continued; thank goodness she gave it up soon after starting!
The book seems more like a private journal than a book. Again, the story itself was interesting, but the writing style really took away from that, almost to the point that I just wanted the book to be over, more than I wanted to learn more about her story.
The book seems more like a private journal than a book. Again, the story itself was interesting, but the writing style really took away from that, almost to the point that I just wanted the book to be over, more than I wanted to learn more about her story.
April 17, 2017
Right from the first page you are wrapped up in amazing breath holding drama. It then continues in a unique style which tells the story in dialogue between characters. I found I was occasionally confused as one scene leads to another but I was brought back to when and where in the story as I read on. Otherwise it is very good. If you like memoirs definitely consider this one. 3.5
July 31, 2012
I ga e up last night on reading this and I pretty much never do that with a book. I think the story might be a good one but the storytelling is horrible. The writing is just not something that should have been published without some serious rewriting. Or, she could have used a ghost writer.
September 2, 2012
Gave me an insight into Bangladeshi culture. A young girl growing up in the west with dual cultures. She finds her place in the world eventually but not without pain and her determination.
June 18, 2012
An accurate window into the life of a Bengali girl. Hard to read at times. Be aware there are things that happen in her life that are not nice at all! But therefore, quite educational for any western woman to read.
July 28, 2012
This woman is incredibly brave. The story was raw and candid right from the beginning. I had no idea that Bangladeshi women could talk so crudely (I loved it!) I also appreciated the photos at the end- the pictures of Luky's happy-ever-after made me smile and cry for her much deserved happiness.
October 6, 2012
Not entirely impressed....had potential. She has an entire section where it seems she's telling the story to someone..but who? Very strange. And it just seems to drop off in the end and makes me go "huh?"
March 10, 2013
Starts off as a slow burner, picks up and gets really interested in the middle and ends rather abruptly at the end. A good book to help understand different cultural experiences and gives you an appreciation of when good intentions can backfire.
February 20, 2013
I thought this book was incredible and so well written. I literally could not put it down! Definitely a book worth reading especially if you yourself are a Bengali girl!. However, the only criticism I could give is that the ending was not as good as it could have been. Still one of my favourites! x
April 25, 2014
Interesting story altho I felt it was kinda slow moving until I got about 3/4 through the book. I enjoyed the story and learning about the culture. I surely couldn't have survived being stuck in no man's land like Luky was!
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February 25, 2016kindle 436
March 19, 2012
This book is hard to rate, the story is real, the author is real, but the writing wasn't that great. I give Luky props! Tough life, but I see she is doing great and looking sexy these days!
August 14, 2012
The writing style is a little annoying, but the story is true and pretty incredible. Easy metro read. Finished in a few days.
October 11, 2013
Did not care for the writing style, but I couldn't help but admire the pluck of a girl that could overcome the oppression of her culture and find happiness.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 34 reviews