Looking for Me

by Betsy Rosenthal

One of 12 siblings growing up in depression-era Baltimore, Edith isn't quite sure of who she is. Between working at her father’s diner, taking care of her younger siblings, and living in the shadow of her more mature sisters, Edith feels lost in a sea of siblings. When a kind teacher encourages Edith to be a teacher herself one day, Edith sees prospects for a future all her own. Full of joy, pain, humor, and sadness, this novel in verse is a wonderful look at the life of Edith Paul, the author's mother, and is an enduring portrait (complete with family photos and an author's note at the end) of one family's pursuit of the American dream.

Genres: Historical Fiction, Poetry, Middle Grade, Novel In Verse, Childrens, Family, Historical

166 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2012

Reviews

[Gloria Thompson · Rating 4 out of 5]

A lovely free-verse story about a girl who is one of 12 siblings of a large Jewish family growing up during the Great Depression. Loved the authors note at the end tying it all together.

[Sarah · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was SO. GOOD. I usually hate books of poems. Like, I put them down immediately. Loathing.

But this book was different. I picked it up off the "new books" shelf at my school. I flipped through it, saw it was a book of poems, and almost put it down. I then saw the author had the same last name as me, and I thought, "Well that's pretty cool!" and read the inside flap about the book. It's about a girl in a big family, of 12 children. I'm one of 7 children, myself. She is trying to find her place in her large family. Sounded like something I would enjoy. So I checked it out. Boy, am I glad I did.

The structure of the book isn't comparable to a poem. It's set up in stanzas, sure, but they don't rhyme and don't have a set rhythm... however; the flow is gorgeous, startling, and captivating.

Short and sweet. Don't judge this book. Read it if you have a chance. It is concise yet uplifting.

[Elizabeth☮ · Rating 4 out of 5]

YA selection. this book is written in verse. the narrator, edith, is number four in a family of twelve. so the title of the book suggests what young edith is trying to figure out: what exactly is her role in such a large family?

a lot happens in a short period of time, but this is a moving read. perhaps i identified with edith because i am the youngest of six. although my family is not quite as large as hers, it is still difficult finding your voice among so many.

enjoyable read.

[Rhianna Sandoval]

This book personally was one of my favorite books I have read over the past 6 weeks.This book is about a girl that has a pretty big family.In the book she also struggles trying to figure out who she actually is.They call her the litter mother because she's always helping her family like a mother .She is always pushed around by her older siblings witch she doesn't like.I recommend this book to you all and I hope you like it as much as I did.

[Eliana · Rating 5 out of 5]

I’m not a huge poetry person, but I adored the flow and voice of this book! And as one of eleven kids, I found so much of it very relatable. Would recommend to anyone in a large family.

[Heather T · Rating 5 out of 5]

This caught my eye so I picked it up and read the inside cover. It seemed heavy for a J book so I thought I'd check it out thinking I wouldn't like it. Big surprise when I actually really enjoyed it. The story, written in verse, was a quick read yet gave a deep and telling story. I loved reading about the main character, her 11 siblings, and the life they live.

The story itself was heartwarming, heartbreaking, and fun all in the same breath. Because it was set in a different time (during the great depression in Baltimore), I felt the need to explain the differences to my kids before letting them read this.

[Myrtle · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was really interesting because of all the differences.
First off, I hate books in poems but after reading Out of the Dust for school and loving it I thought I would try this. I'm glad I did.
Secondly, I don't have any religion so it was interesting learning about Jewish religion.
Lastly, I'm an only child (dad died before I could have any more) so it was nice hearing about what it's like living in a big family since my while family is me and mom.
Overall, amazing book and would definitely recommend.

[The Book Girl · Rating 5 out of 5]

This review was previously posted on The Young Girl Who Loved Books

Looking for me, is one of my favorite junior books and may become my favorite book I have read in 2018, but is quite early to give a book that award.

This book is truly a gem and a must for every young child's bookshelf.

In this story, we follow young and cute Edith. I felt like I connected with her right away. She made this adorable story such a great one. So Edith is a kid with a ton of siblings. It is the depression and while the story doesn't go into detail about hunger and other stuff surrounding the era we do get glimpses into how the time affected our young Edith. I enjoyed that part.

This book would be great as supplemental information for an Immigration and Depression topics in both school and homeschool curriculum.

At the end of the story, there are family photos in the back. Finding out what happened to each one of them made the story really sweet. It also brought in some reality to the story, since it is based on the author mothers life. She did her mother's story justice for sure.

I want to talk about the structure of this book. It is a book written in verse, although it is not exactly a poem. It is set up in various stanzas and they are so beautiful I cried at times. It is gorgeous, captivating, and completely heartbreaking. This book is short and sweet, even a slow reader can whip through this book in a day. I encourage you to take time with this book though and savor it.

I am so glad I picked up this book at the library. You should check it out yourself!

[Kate · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is truly a gem. Written all in verse, which I normally can't get through, it touched my heart and brought tears to my eyes. I was impressed by how well the verse was still able to move the story and I felt that I knew Edith intimately. Imagine my surprise when I found that this was based on the author's mothers' life! This made it all the more compelling for me.

Growing up in a family of six kids, I could relate to some of the things. And now as a mother, I especially loved this line, "But I don't understand why a man who hates children had twelve of them. That just doesn't add up." You have to read the full verse to get it, but I didn't know whether to laugh or cry, because I could see it through the child's eyes when I overdramatically felt offended by my parents being stressed out with me, and I could see it through parents eyes as well.

Beautiful. I am going to try and persuade my husband to read this as he has Jewish ancestry and is fascinated by family history.

[Deanna · Rating 4 out of 5]

Rosenthal uses her mother as inspiration for main character Edith. A slice of life story which I loved... reminded me of listening to my grandmother tell stories about her life growing up. Written in verse, the story moves along seamlessly and conveyed so well how I imagine it would have felt to BE Edith. The nostalgic feel makes this another one I wonder how kids will take to.

[Sbucior · Rating 5 out of 5]

I grabbed this book because my 3rd grade son had brought it home from the library. He had already read it, liked it, so I wanted to see what it was about. Oh my goodness. What a sweet, sad, and wonderful story told in short poems. I cried at least twice; the author's ability to share important snippets of her mothers life growing up in just a few words was amazing. Everyone who has grown up in a large family would identify with this book, spoiler alert the family in the book has 12 (!) children. This is a book I will continue to recommend for both young and old. I won't forget it.

[Ashley]

I love verse novels :)
This was a great medium for the story of this young girl in a large family, trying to find herself, her place, and who she is.

[Meredith · Rating 5 out of 5]

I loved the book. I have been looking for myself for years. I enjoyed the narrator's search for herself in the midst of her huge family. I hadn't expected a poetry book, but I devoured it in less then three hours because the poems read like short stories.

[Carol · Rating 5 out of 5]

I did not expect the emotional punch this book about a girl growing up in a large family in 1930s Baltimore wields. Taken from recorded interviews by her daughter, the book details Edith, the fourth child of 12, as she finishes her last year of elementary school. Written in free verse, it reads quickly and suddenly hits you with the emotions. So good!

[The Reading Countess · Rating 5 out of 5]

I'm on a quest to find great literature for my middle grade readers that discusses the Great Depression and immigration, two central ideas that circulate throughout my curriculum all year. Looking for Me fits the bill to a T. A poetic narrative (another win!), this one will surely reverberate with more than one of my readers despite those two central ideas swirling around. They will see themselves when Edith, or "number four" (out of twelve, if you're counting), can't find her place in such a noisy and disparate group of individuals. They will see themselves when her parents seem to overlook her time and time again because the struggle simply to survive is all-consuming. They will see themselves when Edith's family celebrates the various holidays of her Jewish culture. Why? Because this is the story of humanity; this is the kind of book we should be putting in our kids' hands so they may feel the pinch of people like Edith's shoes on their own feet. Strong literature helps to grow our hearts and, in turn, aids in empathy toward our fellow human beings. I can think of no better time than now to introduce Looking for Me to my readers.
Possible Mentor Texts for Poetry (beginning of the year and elegy):
"Goodbye to Summer"
When Dad's mother, Bubby Anne,
gives us all pairs of new socks
to wear to school,
it's time to say goodbye to summer.

When Mom's mom, Bubby Etta,
reaches out into her shopping bag
full of crayons, jacks, and candy
and hands each of us
"a little something special
to start off the new school year."
it's time to say goodbye to summer.

But I wish it wasn't.
Now I'll have to go to school all day
instead of swimming
at the Patterson Park pool
and playing stickball
with Daniel and his friends
and taking Melvin to the Roxy
to see the Popeye cartoons.

I'll have to get up early,
even before the sun rubs the sleep
out of its eyes.
I'll have to face math tests
and spelling bees and homework,
and the weather will turn dreary and stormy
like in a scary movie.

I know it's time to say goodbye to summer,
but I'd much rather be saying hello.

"Sometimes I Forget"
Sometimes when I come home from school
I expect Melvin to race to the door
and wrap himself around me
like a snug skirt.

Sometimes when I open the door,
so much noise rushes at me
from Lenny, Sol, Jack and baby Sherry
that I even think I hear Melvin.

Sometimes when I come in,
someone brushes by me
and I'm sure it's Melvin's floppy curls
I feel tickling my arm.

But then I remember,
and the house
feels too quiet,
too still,
and I can hardly breathe.

"It's Shabbos"
Mom should be lighting the candles,
but she's not.

She should be pulling in the candlelight
with her hands
just before she covers her eyes
and says the Shabbos blessing,
but she's not.

She should be setting the lit candles
on the dining table
before she serves the meal,
but she's not.

"I cannot thank God
for the Shabbos light
when he has left me
in such darkness," she says.

"I Can Feel Summer Just Around the Corner"
But it won't be like last summer.

Mom will still hang the garden hose
over the clothesline
to make an outdoor shower
for us to run through
on the hottest days,

but Melvin won't be here
to hold my hand
and giggle
when the cool water sprays him.

And Dad will still take us
to the shore on Sundays.

but Melvin won't be here
to hold my hand and squeal
as we play chase with the waves
up and down the beach.

And we'll stop
on our way home from the shore
for four-cent hot dogs at Hymer's

but I won't be able
to wipe the mustard and sauerkraut
off his face and fingers and hair.
I won't be able to take his hand
to walk back to the car afterwards.

We never talk about Melvin much
anymore,
but I cry about him
every night in my pillow,
and in the day
my hand feels awfully empty.

[Vikki VanSickle · Rating 4 out of 5]

his sweet book has a lot going for it. This is an era that isn’t over done and the immigrant story still feels contemporary. Some of the monetary issues that were all too common place during the depression ring true in this period of recession. Author Betsy R. Rosenthal, who draws on her own family’s history (including family photos and a short afterward), does a good job exploring the various forms of sibling relationships. Sometimes Edith is ‘the Little Mother,’ looking after her younger siblings, and other times she is treated like Cinderella by her haughty older sister. No matter what your birth order is, there is a poem in here that you can relate to. There is a lot of strife and a lot of love in the family and the author does a good job giving a balanced view of family life.

There is some tragedy, which is handled with enough sensitivity that younger readers won’t be traumatized, but I appreciated how Rosenthal didn’t shy away from issues such as grief and a parent’s depression and how these things affected the family. Some of the poems rhymed, which removed me from the narrative and somewhat disrupted the flow of the story, but this was a fairly minor issue and I doubt many kids would be as distracted by it as I was. Overall the book felt quite light and was a refreshing read.

This book made me think of this recent article in Publisher’s Weekly online about the lack of lighter-fare for the early middle grade reader. Looking for Me fits this niche to a degree, but has a bit more weigh than some of the early chapter books listed in the article. It’s a good book for young readers (6-8) who are advanced or older readers (9-12) who may be struggling. The large font, concise story, and prose-poetry format is accessible and non-intimidating. The family has a ‘Little Rascals’ camaraderie that reminded me of Turtle in Paradise by Jennifer Holm and the movie Lost in Yonkers (an underrated family film set in the early 1940s featuring a scene-stealing Mike Damus). The family’s Jewish background and recent immigrant status also brought to mind The All-of-a-Kind Family by Sydney Taylor.

[Kathi · Rating 5 out of 5]

This sweet but honest biography was written in verse by the author about her mother, Edith.
“Number four” was born with eleven siblings in a Jewish family who immigrated to Maryland in the 1930s. They were not wealthy, and all who could, worked incredibly hard to run “Paul’s Luncheonette,” and to feed the family. The details of how the family lived, worked, cared for each other, slept, worked, played, worked…and worked more will stay with me.

One was the fact that Edith in 5th grade, on occasional nights when she had to close and lock up their family diner alone. Located across town, she had to empty the register, take the money in a bundle, run to catch a bus, travel to her stop, and then run home. Her father was driving a cab on those nights; her mother, who had worked all day at the diner, waited for Edith to arrive.

This welcome home was after two o’clock in the morning.

Although school began just a few hours later at 8, Edith later remembered those times when she and her mother were alone together. They both stayed awake longer to share time and thoughts.

Thankfully, during that year, a teacher with a very large classroom of students noticed how tired Edith always was, but also how bright she was. Seeing this and talking to her about this changed Edith’s life.

This little book does have a true happy ending.

[Marianne Wonnacott · Rating 4 out of 5]

I've never read a story told in verse. Never thought I would like it. Although the large family that I come from and the large family that is now mine are not as big as Edith's family of 12 children, these stories are great reminders of what it's like to grow up in a house full of children. Sometimes exasperating, sometimes fun, sometimes hard, sometimes joyful, and always loud.

My favorite verse of the whole book was the one that caught my tear ducts off guard and sent them overflowing throughout the rest of the book. "...And I tell her that the day before yesterday I thought my family was way too big, but now my family is one too small."

Life for this Russian Jewish immigrant family living in Baltimore during the depression was tough. It's a very quick read that leaves a lasting impression. This book made me feel sad that I am not a good story teller. Maybe it's because my memory is so bad. I should try harder to tell stories to my children.

[PSU · Rating 5 out of 5]

Looking for me is a really good book if you have a lot of brothers and sisters.This book is about this girl that has a lot of siblings her dad makes them work at the store.Her mom also work ,the kids go to school.Later in the book his little brother died because he couldn't breath well.Her mom stays with her children now so she has to go take care of them instead of working.
I would recommend this book to people that like to read new books that are funny at the begging and sad at the very middle of the story.Like Ms.McGuane and Mrs.Reicks, so they could read at there book club.
This book was intresting for me because me and her a lot of incommed, but I also didn't like it because her little brother died.If my baby brother would died I wouldn't even speak, eat or go to school.
-Gabriela Quintana

[Jennifer · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is so similar to the experiences I had growing up in a family of ten. I love when Edith spends time with her mother in the late evenings watching her iron because that was the only time she had her mom to herself. In a large family you find those times with parents as very special. In my family we become the number of our birth order. Edith also experienced this. As with Edith's family when my family gets together it is loud and obnoxious but mostly fun. We never had birthday parties with friends because it was a "party" with our brothers and sisters. That's what mom told us

[Emily · Rating 4 out of 5]

I highly recommend this book if you can find it. If you grew up in a big family (I am one of 7 kids, not as big as the protagonist's family with 12 children, but probably considered large today) you will probably find something in this book that you can relate to. If not, you can still enjoy the story of an 11 year old girl finding her identity. It is short but has a lot of emotional material, very realistically depicted in the voice of a child. Overall a very touching, uplifting book that had me wiping away tears.

[Tanja · Rating 4 out of 5]

Loved this novel in verse inspired by the author's mum's childhood, growing up in a family with twelve children in the time around the Depression. Edith, the eleven year old narrator, shares what it's like to be stuck in the middle of so many siblings, the trials and challenges as well as the joy and love. Most of all, Edith wants to know who she really is, not an easy task with so many people around but bit by bit, Edith finds out more and more about herself, while sharing what the family's day to day life looked like. Glad to have this title for our growing collection of novels in verse.

[Kara · Rating 4 out of 5]

Family hisotry set to prose poems telling of one girl figuring out who she is, where she comes from, and hwre she's going. A true telling of one of many American girls who were the first of many things in thier families - ie American, educated, and longing for independnce.

[Edward Sullivan · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good family story based on the experiences of author's mother growing up as one of twelve children in Depression-era Baltimore.

[Gina · Rating 5 out of 5]

My daughters age 7 and 9 loved this book. Written in verse, it was an emotional book that brought reflection, laughter and tears.

[Moses Goldstein · Rating 3 out of 5]

Brief Thoughts on "Looking for Me" by Betsy Rosenthal

"I'm just plain Edith...of no special place[,]" is how the book begins, but, by the end, we realize that Edith has grown into her own as a Jewish woman aiming for Towson's Teacher College. Rosenthal takes an optimistic tone for the Depression-era circumstances, turning verses into a comprehensive storyline, but does not manage to capture my full attention. As a Jewish, only-child, Millenial, trans person, I found it difficult to connect with Edith and her large family, though not impossible to find common ground. As for my perspective in this review, it is important to note that I mostly read queer fiction or non-fiction for adults. I read to have my own experiences reflected back to me or similar experiences conveyed -- at least at this time. This book was given to me as a gift. This is my first middle grade book that I have read. Overall, I do not think this book is my cup of tea, but I can see how it would be a great read for any Jewish child interested in what living through Depression-era Baltimore was actually like.

As for common ground, "Looking for Me" was easier to read once I found common ground with Edith. I found a few with Edith; being Jewish, working for my father, teachers as inspiration, and the feeling of lostness in a sea of apathy that is pervasive throughout the book. As someone raised Jewish, I was able to connect with Edith as a someone raised to be Jewish. I appreciated the reflection of Jewish traditions highlighted in the books, such as the gefilte fish story of "Second Chance"s when the children give the flopping fish a second chance in the tub, as well as "Trying to Be Polite at Eunice's House", "My Dumb Neighbor", "Raymond Gets into Trouble", "Like We Do Every Year on Rosh Hashanah", and more, as they reminded me of my own Passovers and Rosh Hashanahs with my own much smaller bio-family. As someone who used to work in my father's office, I was able to connect with the stories about hard work. As someone who was never really supposed to read, I can connect with Edith's dreams of education and following her dreams as one teacher inspires her to do. As someone who sometimes has trouble defining themselves in the larger scheme of the world, I can connect with the feeling of lostness that occurs. As someone who has transitioned, I can especially connect with the feeling of neglect that continues throughout the book, until Edith has time with her mother all to herself (Rosenthal 135). The feeling of not being quite seen as something special is also pervasive and something I personally feel often, so it was nice to have that represented in the book as well. Oftentimes, it felt as though no one could really see me, so the teacher who sees that Edith is quite smart and making choices and encourages her dreams really connected with my own experiences with teachers who reached out to me, encouraged me, and helped me thrive in school. This common ground made the book more readable and engaging for me.

Overall, "Looking for Me" is a petite compilation of stories that have been graciously passed down; they will last much longer for them being translated into verse. I was truly blessed to have been given this book. Anyone who gives me a book is a true friend. While I would not read it again, I would agree that there is a special place in my heart for Edith's story and her teacher's brave confidence in her ability to succeed, as well as her tale of familial support. I hope it blesses Jews who were once children and Jewish children in many, many more places. Perhaps it will be just their cup of tea.

[Nina Seal · Rating 5 out of 5]

After reading "Looking For Me" by Betsy. R Rosenthal, I can confidently say that this will be in my classroom library as an educator. This book, based off of a true story, covers the childhood years of Edith Paul and her large family during the Great Depression era. Edith is a strong, independent girl who helps take care of her eleven siblings, as her parents both work. As the book progresses, Edith faces hardships such as loss, lack of money in her family, and trying to find herself while taking care of everyone else. At first I was skeptical about this book being composed entirely of poems, but enjoyed the smooth transitions and how the poems were designed to come full circle. For example, many of the beginning poems such as "Edith Of No Special Place", "I Wonder What It Would Be Like", "Lucky Lenny", "I wonder", and "The Day Our Family Got Too Small" show struggles of identity crisis in a family of fourteen, living during the Great Depression, and the loss of a family member. Edith is an extraordinary human, yet she thinks of herself as unintelligent, invisible, and underprivileged. As I kept reading, Edith begins to realize her worth and how grateful she is. In poems such as "Somebody Listened", "October 2", "The Meaning Of Bittersweet", "An Inspiration, "Who I Am Now", and "After My Last Day Of School", Edith now wishes to pursue her dreams of going to college to become a teacher. She has also learned to cope with her grief and take in those bittersweet moments. As she finds herself, she realizes that her family may not be the most financially stable, but is grateful for the little things in life. I chose this book because the summary from Goodreads intrigued me, but find myself in awe of the cover after reading this book. The Russian dolls represent her family and how as you pull back one layer, there are many more underneath. This analogy had a negative connotation in the beginning, but as the book advanced, Edith found her family to be "one too small" following the death of her little brother Melvin. This book was inspiring, real, and had raw content that 4th and 5th graders can learn from. Although it was an easy read, it covers topics such as grief and the Great Depression which many students do not learn about until intermediate grade levels. I recommend this book to anyone who is wanting to read it.

[Grace McCrery]

Looking For Me by Betsy R. Rosenthal

This simple read verse novel is perfect for students in 4-5th grade. The book is narrated by a 11 year old girl who is in her last year of elementary school. Edith, who has a large family including 11 other siblings has been struggling to find her own identity. Towards the beginning of the book she describes herself as “number four and nothing more” to her teacher who asked the class to write a poem about their families. The book is very short and written almost as a continuous poem, with a sinopsis title on each page. This makes the book easier to read and understand. Edith goes on to describe her relationships with her grandmother, mother and her father who is very strict. Her father, who wanted a large family, is not very loving and uses his many children for labor in his family diner. Edith’s family comes closer together when one of her younger brothers suddenly passes away. This tragedy shows her family true emotion and allows them to grieve together. Edith’s family is also Jewish, which is shown in the book by mentioning Jewish holidays as well as rules members in the Jewish community follow. Students will be able to relate to Edith and the emotions she feels throughout the book. After reading, student’s should attempt to make their own story book that reflects a certain time in their life.

[QNPoohBear · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a cute novel in verse about a girl from a large family trying to find her own voice. The story is cute, funny and bittersweet in places. The story is set against the backdrop of the Depression and the Depression is present but not a huge deal. Edith also has to deal with a bit of anti-Semitism.

I liked Edith. She was smart, funny and fiercely loyal to her family but I didn't like how accepting she was of her role as the "little mother." Slowly she finds her own identity separate from her siblings. Her father really annoyed me with his sternness and attitude towards his children and of course, having all those children. My sympathies are with his wife.

My favorite part of the book was the family photos in the back and knowing what happened to them all after the story ends.

This is a nice read for 9-11 year olds or independent readers. It's a little lacking in depth for adult readers.

[SundayAtDusk · Rating 5 out of 5]

In prose, Betsy Rosenthal tells the story of her mother Edith's childhood in 1930s Baltimore. The story is a very effective combination of happiness and sadness. Edith is the fourth of twelve children in a Jewish family that owns a diner. When a terrible thing happens, she has to go work in the diner after school, at times closing the diner by herself and not getting home until 2 AM. She was only 11-12 years old. The book explores Edith's relationship with her parents in a realistic manner, too, not covering up her mixed feelings about her father. But don't think that means Looking for Me is dark or depressing. It is not. The light always shines through the story, and Edith is inspired by a teacher to dream something she never thought possible. The final photograph in the book shows it was indeed possible with hope and hard work.

(Note: I received a free ARC of this book from Amazon Vine.)