I wanted to like this book. I really, really wanted to like this book. And Publishers Weekly put it on their top books of 2011 list!
But....
The premise is original. Joan, daughter of Arthur and Leia (and I loved the author's explanation that in the dystopian future, people named themselves after legendary heroes, even though every time I saw "Leia" it completely threw me out of the story) is a warrior from a time when dark demons and black magic have enslaved most of the planet. Joan is the Free Humans' best chance of survival - by going back in time some two hundred years to 1888 and destroying the author of the book that allows the demons to invade. But of course, a tattooed female assassin from the future can't just waltz into Victorian London and start shooting at aristocrats. No, she must earn how to behave in this most alien of societies.
Cool story set up, right? Hits all the notes: dystopian fantasy, social comedy of manners, the role of women - I think I was most excited about the story promise of a female warrior from a horrible, deadly world, yet it is a world that treats women far more equitably than the, by comparison, safe and luxurious Victorian era. How would she react? What would be her dilemmas?
However, the novel starts to fall apart almost from Chapter One. By great good luck or simply stunning coincidence, Joan manages to land smack dab in the arms of practically the only man in all of 19th century England who can help her: Simon Grenville, an aspiring master of the occult who just happens to be frenemies (albeit more enemy than friend at the moment) of the very man Joan is seeking to assassinate.
Simon is portrayed later in the book as someone who is fairly proficient at magic, especially at protection and warding speeds. Yet when the book begins, he seems shocked that magical things might be happening at the standing stones on his country property. (C'mon, if you were studying magic and the occult from an early age, and you had actual standing stones on your ancestral land, wouldn't that be the FIRST thing you would investigate? I know I would. But maybe that's just me.)
Also, Simon should be very well aware that villain Alex Reynell has a mad-on for him. Simon is at his country home in the first place because Reynell made a demon possess Simon's sweet younger sister Eleanor, a possession Simon stopped just in time and from which Eleanor is now recovering. Reynell retaliated by killing Eleanor's suitor. So you'd think Simon would be somewhat on guard. Yet he doesn't put a protection spell on his land, and leaves himself open for an attack by hellhounds.
Simon is a bit of a numbskull from the get-go.
Simon is also remarkably liberal in his views on women. This is Victorian England, y'all. Women were possessions. Married women had zero legal stature. It was far more socially restrictive for females than the more popular historical romance era, the Regency. And the clothing especially was restrictive. But this was also the start of the suffrage movement, and social awareness. Barriers between classes were beginning to break down. There are reams of books on the Victorians, their dichotomies and their hypocrisies. It's a fascinating time period, and I love the idea of dropping a woman who is used to leading soldiers in a society that, as the author describes it, is pretty gender blind, into Victorian mores.
But for all of the attitudes shown Joan in the book, she might as well as have come back to the 20th or even 21st century. Sure, there are a few passing references to constricting skirts and corsets, but Joan seems to adapt pretty fast. People, corsets aren't something to sneeze at. I wish historical authors would try on at least a modern day version, much less an authentic 19th century corset, before they let their heroines breeze through the equivalent of a spinning class mixed with a two hour cardio sculpt class. And look at a few fashion plates of the day! 1888 fashions still had a small bustle, and tight bodices and sleeves, and skirts draped over multiple layers. But Joan is able to tear a mere slit in her skirt and off she goes to the races.
And Simon, of course, doesn't blink an eye at this liberated woman living in his house, spending most of her time with his sheltered sister. He's remarkably evolved even for 2012.
But hey, these are mere quibbles and more about the book I wish it was, instead of what is actually on the page.
Unfortunately, No Proper Lady isn't much of a romance, either. Of course Simon thinks Joan is hot, especially once her hair is washed and some good old Victorian cooking puts flesh on her dystopian thin body. As for Joan, she's used to sex as an adrenaline escape valve, and Simon is one good looking valve. But the romance is oddly clinical. You never feel that the characters yearn for each other, or see each other as anything but an attractive means to relieve lust. In fact, the first time they fully give in to their desire, Joan is under the influence of an aphrodisiac administered by the villain! It doesn't exactly scream One True Love.
The book as a whole suffers from a lack of believable motivations. While the biggie, Joan wanting to save her world, is very well fleshed out and relatable, the other characters and their motivations are less so. When Joan tells Simon she needs to kill Reynell, Simon demurs and thinks Reynell can repent of his evil ways. Dude, this is the guy who betrayed your friendship, mentally and emotionally raped your sister via demon possession, and sent a pack of hellhounds after you with no provocation. Wake up and smell the tea. And Joan literally wakes up and declares herself to be in love with Simon, even though we saw very little of their relationship building (I'd believe it more if Joan said she was in love with Eleanor, but it's not that type of book.)
The biggest problem is the villain: Reynell is wicked...why, precisely? He seems to hate Simon simply because Simon didn't want to study the same magic Reynell did. But Simon wasn't seeking to limit or take down Reynell so why the personal attacks? In fact, if you were going to be the Evil Grand PooBah of the world, wouldn't you want to keep the one man who has the skills to bring you down a bit closer, or try to play him a bit more? And why is Reynell even consorting with dark forces in the first place? He already comes from a wealthy and titled family. There are a few references to Reynell winning inordinately at gaming tables, but less people want to play with him because of it, so that seems a non-starter. And towards the end, Reynell even seems to relent on his goal of destroying Simon. Which again beg the question - what the ^}<*# does Reynell want, aside from just being a pompous, vacillating and self-centered git?
If your story is only as strong as your villain, then this story has the strength of a wet paper towel.
But I don't want it to sound all bad. There are some wonderful aspects to the book. I love the world of Victorian magic Cooper starts to build, and I really wish she had done more with it. Joan's world is appropriately chilling. I liked how Cooper tied the story to the burgeoning Spiritualist movement of the time (the only instance where I felt like I was reading a historical) and again, wish she had done more. The writing itself is decent, not overly lyrical or beautiful, but it keeps you anchored in the story. There are only a few anachronisms that threw me out (eg. Simon uses the word "platoon" to mean a military company, but while platoon was in use in the US since 1779, it wasn't used by the British Army until 1913. I know, I know, the nits, I pick them.)
So, a generous three stars, mostly for the awesome premise.
But Publishers Weekly, you're now on notice and have lost a gazillion credibility points with me.