8 Great Dates for Moms and Daughters

by Dannah Gresh

With all the pressures and influences of today's world, Christian moms worry about their little girls and how they will grow up.Quality time between a mom and a daughter can be the greatest protection against the world's pressures to make a girl mature too quickly.Knowing this, Dannah Gresh, popular speaker and founder of the Secret Keeper Girl® conferences, has developed a host of dating ideas to help moms invest the time needed to deeply connect with their daughters.
8 Great Dates includes fun mother-daughter get-togethers, perfect one-on-one or for a small group of moms and their energetic 8-12 year-old daughters.Each date focuses on one topic surrounding beauty and modesty and is full of fun while at the same time imparting a life and faith-enhancing message. The book provides a mom with everything she needs to plan and carry out the activities and includes topics such

The power of true beauty...what makes a girl beautiful?
Truth or bare fashions...how to balance fashion and godly modesty
Hair, makeup and clothes...who should be your model?
Here's the secret to bringing up healthy, grounded, and spiritually rich girls!

Genres: Parenting, Christian, Nonfiction, Self Help, Spirituality

192 pages, Kindle Edition

First published September 1, 2010

About the author

Dannah Gresh, a mother/daughter communication coach, has sold well over three quarters of a million copies of her books—including And the Bride Wore White and 2008's best-selling CBA youth book, Lies Young Women Believe (coauthored with Nancy Leigh DeMoss)—making her one of the most successful Christian authors targeting teens and preteens. With the belief that today's culture has been seeking to rob little girls of their innocence, Dannah has been fighting on the front lines to protect them. Her fun line of Secret Keeper Girl mom/preteen daughter connecting resources and live events that tour the country provide moms with just the right tools to fight back. She has long been at the forefront of the movement to encourage both tweens and teens to pursue purity and is often called upon to defend the conservative position of abstinence in national news media like USA Today, Time, Chicago Tribune, and Women's Wear Daily. She is also a frequent contributor to FamilyLife Today, Midday Connection, and Focus on the Family. Dannah lives in State College, Pennsylvania, with her husband, Bob, and their children, Robby, Lexi, and Autumn, whom the family adopted from China in 2007. She and her husband founded Grace Prep, a new model in Christian high school education, which Bob administrates. She is shamelessly in love with her labradoodle, Stormie. (DannahGresh.com)

Reviews

[Hardyanne · Rating 1 out of 5]

Would be negative stars if that was possible. Awful. Unbelievable that she actually put some of these things in writing.

[Erin · Rating 2 out of 5]

Target audience reached. With a 10 year old daughter who is drifting away in the midst of hormonal changes, I had high hopes for this book to help us reconnect. The verse on the dedication page happens to be my focus verse for the year. Everything was lining up for me to love this book. Long story short, the content is good but delivery is “cringey” as my daughter would say.

Part one discusses what a typical girl goes through at puberty and what can be expected at this stage. It reminds mothers that we have been there and often relive the strong emotions for a couple of days each month. This portion of the book, while a nice reminder, could have been expanded more. The end of part one gives an overview of the dates, and some general suggestions about how to implement them.

The dates themselves are fine ideas of things to do to connect with our daughters such as visiting a fancy tea house, shopping for modest clothing, and a hair appointment. However, I found some of the details a bit strange. For instance, in date number one, the idea is to have a fancy tea date with fine china and fancy desserts to illustrate the concept that our daughters are special. However, the author suggests starting the date (in a public place) by massaging our daughter’s hands with scented lotion while kneeling. My daughter would be mortified at the idea.

Each date is well organized with preparation instructions, a podcast to listen to together (unavailable at time of this review), description of the date and how to incorporate a provided worksheet, followed by a reminder to pray before going home. While the questions on the worksheet are thought provoking, filling this out during the date does not feel like a natural thing to do. I think my daughter would lose interest if I were consulting books and worksheets, rather than being in the moment with her in a genuine conversation.

Part three at the back of the book includes twenty devotionals for the daughter, a FAQ section, and tear out worksheet pages to be used on the dates.

The timing of this release is unfortunate. The outings suggested are expensive or very difficult with public health restrictions. However, the author does give ideas for home based, less expensive options.

This appears to be a new edition of an existing book which is based on a workshop. The updated cover is significantly more appealing than the 2010 version. However, this feels like a workshop in book form, perfect for those who cannot get to one of the author’s workshops. I would recommend this book to mothers and daughters who enjoy following a detailed plan and filling out worksheets rather than to those who are more free spirited or want to put their own spin on things.

Thank you to NetGalley and Harvest House for providing this ebook for review.

[Tiffany · Rating 4 out of 5]

When I saw this book available for review I was excited. As a little girl I can remember my father taking me on daddy daughter dates where he kept up with my interest, taught me how a lady should be treaded and made me feel secure, beautiful and loved. I have very fond memories of these special once a month “dates” and always looked forward to them. As a mom, I wanted my daughters to have the same experience with both their father and I. This book gave me a head start in planning and direction to accomplish this goal.

8 Great Dates for Moms and Daughters is a guide, devotional and planner for moms. It addresses the topics of true beauty, fashion and modesty. The book is a great tool for use in great mommy/daughter dates that I feel could be used and adapted for many ages although it is directed toward the “tween” age group. Our daughters face pressures earlier than we did, it is never too early to discuss that true beauty is on the inside along with modesty. Each date is geared toward the goal above, modesty, inner beauty and self worth.

8 Great Dates starts off with a short chapter specifically for mom, which I found very uplifting. As a mom the stress of woman hood, nagging children, house hold chores, bills and other issues can easily wear you down. This chapter had a positive understanding message that helped clarify the books’ purpose along with my purpose as a mom. From here it went on to another short yet important chapter, “understanding the tween emotions and years”. Although you’ve been through it, this new generation is not the same as previous generations, pressures have changed and each woman is uniquely different. This chapter helped remind me just how tough those years can be and brought back a sea of emotions and understanding. The third chapter gives a quick and important overview on how to maximize the use of the dates to follow. Each date is its own chapter and includes a key verse, key thought, suggested setting (tea room, spa, shopping etc.) along with materials, lesson plans and an evaluation. The book includes budget friendly options for those who may need to have the date at home in order to save on cost. A huge bonus to this book and also to each date is the audio download available to accompany each date. The audio is used before and after each date while you are driving to your destination, preparing both hearts and minds for the date ahead.

*Reviewed for ReaderViews. Also posted on my blog*

[Melissa · Rating 3 out of 5]

Girl Gab: are you a Styrofoam cup, a ceramic mug, or a priceless piece of china?

[The Lazy Reader · Rating 1 out of 5]

This isn't going to be a full review, because I'm not in the headspace for that right now. This will just be a quick jotting down of my overall thoughts. At some point, I will sit down and flesh this out.

I decided a year or two ago that I wanted to track down all of the purity culture books that came out when I was young and read them to help me make sense of my upbringing and my struggles now as an adult. While I don't remember ever reading any purity culture books myself growing up, I was surrounded by purity culture teachings, and they profoundly affected my life in negative ways. By coincidence, my mother purchased a handful of copies of this particular book with the intent to give them to a friend of ours for her daughter and her daughter's friends bible study. A warning signal went off in my head when I saw the cover, and I told my mom to hold off so I could read the book first and determine if it was appropriate or not.

I'm very glad I did.

To keep this short and brief, I would not recommend this book to absolutely anyone. The teachings are harmful and destructive and very, very shaming. I also believe they are firmly unbiblical. There are comparisons made between a girl's behavior and various unflattering inanimate objects (trash, Styrofoam, broken china). Young girls are taught to be responsible for the behavior of not just their male peers but also of men significantly older than them. There's reference to some scientific principle or something that I am positive the author has completely misused and misunderstood. And there is one line in particular in the book that is truly horrifying and would take a much longer review to fully unpack.

Needless to say, I convinced my mom that this book would not be good for a pre-teen bible study, and she did not give them to our friend. Having spent an extensive amount of time around this friend at this point, I'm confident she would have been appalled by this book.

I implore you, please do not give this book to any female in your life. Let's let purity culture die. We don't need it to understand biblical purity. We just need the word of God.

[Relyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I love Dannah Gresh's message. This would be a great book for any mom wanting to connect with her daughter in a fun and godly way.

[Jenn B · Rating 5 out of 5]

Fabulous book for Moms of Tweens. This book gives you ideas for special mother-daughter outings to teach your daughter that she is uniquely beautiful and to make her feel special.

[Nicole Flowers Frye · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great book to help lead a life with God.

[Maureen · Rating 3 out of 5]

Sigh. Some good principals but borderline cliche with definitions of what qualifies as feminine. I don't want to flatten my daughter's understanding of herself and this book definitely oversimplified how to raise a whole and healthy young woman in today's oversexed society.

I know raising kids in today's society can be scary and overwhelming but it doesn't mean we need to rely on black and white ways to navigate our way through it. I bet I sound like a relativistic liberal but I'm just advocating for discernment and nuance.

I like that the author promotes building relationships with daughters.

[Kate (The Shelf Life) · Rating 4 out of 5]

I'm in denial I think. I know my littles is growing up, but it's hard to think of her getting older. I still think of her as this cute, sassy, little toddler. Sadly those days are gone and we're right on the edge of preteen! Yikes! I'm so not ready for that. Any help in trying to combat the future battles she might face is something I'm always on the hunt for. I want to be prepared.

My littles still may not be in the age range of this book, but after reading it, it helped in getting a game plan ready for when she gets there. With today's constant bombardment of image and looks and products and just of things to change a girl from who she is to something else, it's a battle and a young impressionable mind is the battlefield. I remember when I was that age, it wasn't fun then, I can't imagine now with all of this technology. Self esteem is so important and keeping it positive and on God's designed path can be tricky.

Dannah Gresh broke down each section well and she kept everything right to the point. You don't want to swim in pages of overflowing info when wanting to talk to your kid. This was spot on. Not too little and not too much. With each section there is also activity pages. They were good in jumping into topics and guiding them where they need to go and they were wrapped up in scripture that fit with that particular section.

The activity ideas seemed like great ideas. Girl days are important, at least to me, they offer a little more fun in life and they don't have to be expensive. The ideas offered ranged from going to have a tea at a restaurant to giving facial at home. Each mommy/daughter date of course worked with that subject.

I enjoyed this book for all of the different ideas. I think it can be a very useful tool for moms and dads (who can be help with a couple of things that were mentioned). I will be hanging on to this for future reference.


Thank you to Harvest House, I received a copy of this book for free in exchange for an honest review.


This review was originally posted @ http://wordsfromabookaholic.blogspot....

[Cathy · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book brings eight mother-daughter date ideas for girls ages 8-12, to talk about womanhood, God's idea of beauty, society's idea of beauty, and the need for modesty. Dates include a tea party, a place of natural beauty, an art museum, a beauty salon, and shopping with friends at the mall. The grand finale is a date involving the daughter, mom, and dad, to get a guy's perspective and blessing on his daughter. These dates take time, but it was well worth the individual time with my daughters, to focus on them in a relaxed setting, where we are not rushing off to school or the next activity, and where they are not being crowded by siblings. The CD had some good illustrations for the drive to and from the date, and the workbook brought up some good discussions. At this age, both my participating daughters were eager to spend some quality, bonding time with their mom, and were even eager to go over the workbooks. My youngest daughter can't wait to be old enough and keeps asking about it. This is not a book about the birds and the bees, but is about beginning important discussions young.

Just finished doing this series of mother-daughter dates with my middle child, and had done it once before with my oldest at this age. Very well done. We enjoyed the CD of stories and explanations, the date ideas, the time together, the chance to explain some important things rather than letting time slip by without saying them. Her favorite mother-daughter date was the one where we got to bring along another friend and her mom. Mine was being out in nature, but very nice grand finale, too.

[Yvonne Ferlita · Rating 5 out of 5]

My daughter and I have enjoyed the eight great dates and guided discussions. I would only say that I wasn't sure I liked the teaching illustration in the first date. Do we want our daughters to choose purity for the sake of being a fine china tea cup or to avoid being a cheap, used styrofoam cup? While I understand the illustration, I feel that the best way to teach purity, is within the growing relationship our daughters are developing with Jesus. We remain pure for Him. It is because of Him that we are clean. Something to think about, certainly. Otherwise, the book was easy to use, had fun suggestions and assisted me in further opening the lines of communication in relation to beauty, fashion and modesty.

[NaDell · Rating 3 out of 5]

This book was a good book to read to help me know how important it is to build a good relationship with my daughters now when they are little (although I already knew that!) so they will be confident, well-behaved teenagers (or at least that's the hope). This book does have a lot of Bible verses to go along with the dates you should take your daughter on and talking points while you are out.

[Jodi · Rating 4 out of 5]

Read this to find guidance in raising my daughter with the tricky years ahead of us. I would like to find answers to having her dress modestly, dating, and just being around boys in general. This book has some good ideas for addressing these issues. I hope it can help me guide my daughter into making wise decisions in the next 10 years of her life. Eek!

[Nancy B · Rating 3 out of 5]

These "dates" are too expensive for me, and the scripts for the conversations seem a little forced and stilted. Still, I like the ideas of pouring attention on one daughter at a time and of tying the activity to important discussion topics. Gresh offers a structure that I think I can adapt for our family.

[Rachel · Rating 5 out of 5]

I've been working through this with my girls for a couple of years, doing the lessons as they showed the maturity for them, or as issues arose that demanded the training. Gresh does a great job with extra material available on a website, and the lessons really teach convicting truths.

[Greta]

Excited to start these dates!

[Laura · Rating 4 out of 5]

great ideas!

[Denise Diaz]

It was ok.