Jump to ratings and reviews
Rate this book

Becoming Flawesome: The Key to Living an Imperfectly Authentic Life

Rate this book
Overcome perfectionism and self-doubt by unapologetically embracing your fully awesome self—flaws and all—with the co-founder of Mindvalley, a global school that delivers transformational education for all ages.

Perfectionism is the one thing that often stands between us and lasting, deep happiness and feelings of peace and fulfillment. As life happens, we fall in love with the idea of who we could be instead of with who we actually are—leaving parts of ourselves behind and losing sight of what and who are truly important. How can we simultaneously live as ourselves without ourselves?

By sharing revelatory personal anecdotes and thoughtful reflection prompts, Kristina Mänd-Lakhiani, co-founder of the global transformational school Mindvalley, guides you

Finding your own truth despite the external and internal critics Transforming ideas of the Perfect You into the embodiment of the Real YouEmbracing a life where no one needs fixing
Only by finding your way back to yourself and understanding who you really are—by accepting your dents and scratches, your quirky uniqueness, and your flaws—will you thrive in being unapologetically you, most flawesomely.

292 pages, Kindle Edition

Published June 13, 2023

90 people are currently reading
408 people want to read

About the author

Kristina Mänd-Lakhiani

4 books1 follower

Ratings & Reviews

What do you think?
Rate this book

Friends & Following

Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!

Community Reviews

5 stars
44 (32%)
4 stars
51 (37%)
3 stars
27 (19%)
2 stars
14 (10%)
1 star
1 (<1%)
Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews
Profile Image for Bettie.
25 reviews3 followers
July 10, 2023
I WAS SUPER EXCITED when I was asked to write a review about this book. Most of the time I love to read romance, but every now and then I also read non-fiction books. This book came at the right time. The advice that Kristina gave in this book was extremely helpful. And I think that this is the kind of book a lot of people could benefit from.

The book starts very relatable. She uses the term 'Hermione syndrome' which means being a good girl (or boy) and trying to be and look perfect. Hermione is from the Harry Potter books and movies and she is an overachiever and does not like to make mistakes. Very relatable, partly because of social media these days. You want to show off your perfect life on social media. But it is just better to accept your flaws and realize that you are not perfect. Nobody is perfect.

Maybe the reason why we are so unhappy these days is that we have an image of the perfect life in our minds. We are always striving for something better and more. Sure, that isn't always a bad thing. But you should also enjoy the journey and be grateful for the things you already have.

I've learned so much from this book and it is probably too much to talk about everything in this book review. Kristina writes about perfectionism, self-love, trying to fix other people, happiness, vulnerability and so much more. She described the difference between self-care and self-love. Sometimes we use the term self-love for things that are actually self-care. For example: we treat ourselves to a delicious pizza and we say it is self-love, instead of self-care. Self-love is all about the inner world, the way you talk to yourself, etc.

I found the part where Kristina says Happiness is a skill very interesting. Most of us would say it is an emotion, I think I did too. But what if it is really a skill? I mean, you can teach yourself to love yourself, to use more positive self-talk, and to view the world from a positive perspective. So maybe it is a skill? This does not mean you have to be perfect and create the perfect life. It is accepting yourself the way you are. She also gives a few techniques to become a happier person, which she talks more about in her '7 days to happiness' course on MindValley (currently unavailable).

Every chapter ends with a few reflection points, which make you think about your own life and the things you do. This is why I would recommend reading one or two chapters per day. It is not the kind of book you want to finish in a few hours. If you do that, I think you would be overwhelmed with all of the information.

I would definitely recommend getting a psychical copy of this book, this way it is just easier to make notes and mark things you find interesting or important. Plus sometimes you are looking for a specific chapter and it is just easier to find the right chapter with a psychical book in my opinion.

This is the kind of book you want on your bookshelf if you are interested in self-help and advice books and it is now available.
Profile Image for Steph Warren.
1,760 reviews39 followers
July 17, 2023
*I received a free copy of this book, with thanks to the author and the blog tour organisers at Natasha Zo. The decision to review and my opinions are my own.*

This is a combination self-help and journey of personal transformation book, about accepting your flaws and embracing happiness, over success, as a life goal.

The key themes within the book are awareness/mindfulness in daily life, kindness, courage and self-love. The author takes us through these step-by-step, using her own personal anecdotes and researched facts to guide readers in the path of her own, tried-and-tested knowledge and experience.

There are plenty of practical tips for putting the information into practice as you work through the book and each chapter ends with a reflective exercise to practise, consolidate and build on what has been explored so far.

I will admit that I didn’t read this book in the way most likely to get the best out of it, as I was reading it through all at once, in order to bring you my review. I definitely feel you get the most from this book by plunging into the ethos wholeheartedly, completing all of the exercises as you go along, and taking regular pauses to process and reflect, and allow the changes to ‘take’. I do believe that if you engage seriously and commit to the process in this book, it would be transformative – in a positive way – to your approach to life.

There are reference lists and resource links at the back of the book for you to explore further, and if you check out the author links below you will find more information and resources on her website and social media accounts too.

I’m off now to begin chapter one again, slowly this time, and see if I can make my own life just a little bit more ‘flawesome’!

Review by Steph Warren of Bookshine and Readbows blog
https://bookshineandreadbows.wordpres...
Profile Image for Rose Auburn.
Author 1 book58 followers
July 18, 2023
Written by entrepreneur and co-founder of the personal transformation platform, MindValley, Becoming Flawesome offers candid and uncomplicated advice on accepting and embracing who you truly are, rather than constantly striving for an idealistic, unreal version of yourself.

Mänd-Lakhiani has really considered her reading audience in Becoming Flawesome. It’s evident that this is no vanity project but an incredibly well-constructed and contemplated self-help book that is clearly and professionally laid out and, consequently, will have wide application.

The book opens with a nicely engaging introduction that is chatty, informal but full of focused energy and interest. Mänd-Lakhiani is gently encouraging and, as one would expect, incredibly adroit at connecting with her reader, making them feel as though she were present.

She quickly builds up complicity and trust, sharing personal details through anecdotes and accounts. Several of these are amusingly identifiable insights into her daily routine; others are more intimate without becoming syrupy over-shares or feeling disingenuous. Mänd-Lakhiani impresses as genuinely warm and unaffected.

Indeed, although she is undoubtedly a high-achiever, Becoming Flawesome speaks to all readers with adaptable ideas, thought-provoking debate, and straightforward guidance, that is often lost in everyday life.

The book has eight parts, each with sub-chapters, headed by well-chosen, erudite quotes. It’s effortless to navigate, and Mänd-Lakhiani is careful to ensure clarity and accessibility guaranteeing Becoming Flawesome is both convincing and readable.

She is adept at softly yet persistently challenging accepted norms of behavior and the often blinkered, entrenched views that accompany them with clever, whipsmart advice.

The chapters deconstructing exactly what “authentic” means, and more importantly what the concept means for the reader are refreshing, and Mänd-Lakhiani’s enthusiasm is contagious.

Posing questions and scenarios, some rhetorical and others more concise, she draws the reader in and subtly tasks them with re-examining their lives and awareness levels. One of the strengths of Becoming Flawesome is how Mänd-Lakhiani cuts through superfluity to offer practical solutions and instruction without judgment or overt pressure.

Her analysis of the fundamental difference between self-care and self-love was enlightening. Further, the idea of not ‘fixing’ flaws or issues, again, turns well-established behavioral patterns completely volte-face and, although it takes some getting used to, is immensely liberating and, frankly sensible.

Mänd-Lakhiani is also not afraid to address contentious issues. I found her discussion on the psychology of vulnerability, self-delusion, and manipulation supremely interesting and loaded with common sense. There are a number of cerebral light-bulb moments, especially as the book progresses.

At the end of every chapter, Mänd-Lakhiani has designed a series of “Reflection Points”, a combination of meditative and proactive exercises that are simple to implement and yield informative results. Technically, the book is beautifully presented and flawlessly edited, no reverse pun intended!

Becoming Flawesome: The Key to Living an Imperfectly Authentic Life is a clear-sighted, perceptive, and intelligent self-help book written with infectious self-awareness, passion, and positivity. Highly recommended.

Profile Image for Hillary roberts.
247 reviews13 followers
July 11, 2023
I have read my share of Personal development books. I used to hold up to be as perfect as possible. That did NOT end well. In the next few years, I searched for a roadmap that would lead me back to where I was before my health took a sharp dive downward (I am healthy now). I used to think all better would be me with my perfectionism tendencies back so I could continue to go full blast down a road that is/was not sustainable. I could relate t what the author Kristina Mand-Lakhiani called the “Hermonie Syndrom. That was me, always trying to be perfect in everything I do. Then I got tired of it all and acted like I did not give a damn.



The problem with not caring what you do is that everyone passes you in this game of life, and you lose anyway when left in the dust.



Despite my perfectionism, I have always valued authenticity. The problem arose when I realized that the “old” Hillary was gone, and I had no idea who the new Hillary was.



That was the frame of mind when I was contacted to read and review Becoming Flawsome. I am happy that I received the book far enough in advance to test out the journal entries. Journal entries are my favorite. During this, I realized that my values and actual behavior did not match up. I hate Walmart with the fury of a thousand suns, yet I still shop in that store. I realized that I also value supporting local businesses where ever possible. Such as using Libro.FM and Bookshop so that my local bookstores could earn money instead of all my dollars going to Amazon.



I love the journal prompts. The prompts help you dig deeper and consider what YOU identify as authentic. So many people follow what they think they SHOULD be (including myself) that they lose sight of you; they are deep down into the core of their being. The prompts are like a light to show you what you are and value.



As I have said above, I am a productivity and self-development enthusiast. I have read a zillion books, such as The Miracle Morning and others, and I quickly realized that I had to find alternate ways to “get stuff done” with all my illnesses. I feel that 98 percent of the time, other authors lean toward the “ I have to uplevel and be as close to perfect as possible and believe me when I say that method is not sustainable… At all… That is why I love the alternate view that Becoming Flawsome takes. No perfection here, just a way of becoming the best YOU possible, and that is why you should read Becoming Flawsome.

Profile Image for Elissa Norris.
309 reviews1 follower
November 3, 2023
Started slow (and very cheesy feeling). I was ready to turn away assuming it was yet another highly repetitive, cliche “empowering” self help book that lacked anything new or worthy for someone that has devoured so many such books and “done the work”. And then it turned.

I really enjoyed the majority of this book, specifically the middle chapters. Favorite chapters were those focused on those of us with perfectionist tendencies & thoughts, chapters for anyone that struggles with associating their own self worth with their achievements. Those dealing with more idealistic world thoughts/ intentions that can plague an individual bc never match reality. In addition, great advice for anyone that gets lost in the rat race or the idea of “chasing happiness” and “seeking joy” Only wish I had read more books like this 10-15 yrs ago (before figuring a lot of this out the hard way) instead of more achievement based self help books like 7 habits of Highly Effective People, the Power of Now, etc. Idk, maybe some people highly benefit from books empowering them to go out and conquer the rat race. This is not that book. This is more about seeing the joy and happiness that is already around you; how and why you might be losing sight of it. Checking in with motives, imparting realistic checks and balances into your daily goals, and overall not losing yourself, nor your joy, amidst the rat race we all live. Living authentically yourself and finding joy and happiness daily in what surrounds you.
Profile Image for Anthony.
Author 29 books200 followers
July 11, 2023
The Review

This was a memorable and well-developed self-help and motivational guide/book. The author does a remarkable job of writing in a way that readers can relate to as if the book is an ongoing conversation between the author and the reader. The relatability and pop culture references that the author uses in the book help elevate the core themes and messages that the author attempts to convey.

The author’s attention to detail and ability to inspire with her words is a true gift. The things that stood out to me were when the author spoke of self-love versus self-care, and how happiness was a skill we all had to learn. These spoke to me personally, as oftentimes self-care can feel like a chore rather than the love we need at the time, and speaks to the need for an inner dialogue with ourselves from time to time. The trait of happiness and the skill to utilize it also talked to me, as it takes a lot of work to find joy and hold onto it, and it doesn’t always just happen. The emphasis on hard work and yet reveling in the imperfections life throws our way was truly moving.

The Verdict

Memorable, well-written, and engaging, author Kristina Mand-Lakhiani’s “Becoming Flawesome” is a must-read nonfiction and self-help book you won’t want to put down. The heart and passion for which the author writes, and the use of reflection points at the end of each chapter allow the reader to put in the work to make use of the points they emphasized in each chapter.
Profile Image for Becky.
15 reviews
October 10, 2023
I wanted this book to speak to me, but it just didn’t. I tried forcing myself to read it and decided today to honor myself and just delete it from my Kindle. I don’t want to spend my time reading self help books that don’t inspire me. I got to 70% and gave up because my mind kept drifting.

I think this may be transformational for others, but her writing style wasn’t for me. It felt like she was being too buttoned up and didn’t feel real to me. That being said, I don’t know her and have never watched any of her talks. She may be enigmatic and I’m just not in the frame of mind to catch the spark.
84 reviews4 followers
July 15, 2023
"Becoming Flawsome: The Key to Living an Imperfectly Authentic Life" is written by Kristina Mänd-Lakhiani. Through this book, Kristina relays a spectacular message. The book prods us to be truly authentic and live flawsomely. It hopes to help us reconnect with ourselves and lead happy, successful, and fulfilling lives. Divided into eight parts, the book is easy-to-read and simple to understand. The exercises given at the end of every section make our transformative journey feasible. I recommend this enlightening book to people who are striving for personal growth.
1 review
January 31, 2024
"Becoming Flawesome" by Kristina Mänd-Lakhiani isn't just another self-help book; it's a profound journey of self-discovery. One crucial lesson I learned is that our flaws, when embraced with self-love, can be our greatest strengths.

If you're seeking a book that will reshape your perspective on self-worth and personal growth, "Becoming Flawesome" is a must-read. It reminds us that we're all a work in progress, and that's perfectly fine. So, open your heart to this book and let it guide you toward a more authentic and joyful life.
Profile Image for Mesca Elin.
315 reviews21 followers
July 16, 2023
You'll learn so many things by reading this book. Some vital things for living your life in peace and blissfulness. If you are lucky enough you'll discover many hidden things about yourself as well, things that you buried deep down in your subconscious. But these things don't want to be buried anymore. They want to come to light and shine. And that is how the magic of Becoming Flawsome works

Overall I really recommend this book to everyone as it is a truly transformative read.
#BecomingFlawesome
Profile Image for Clare Neubert.
26 reviews1 follower
September 1, 2023
I love a good self improvement book and this is the best one I’ve read yet this year. It was just filled with so many great nuggets of wisdom that I will definitely go back to. It was much needed as it was so inspiring and healing reading the words beautifully written page after page. I highly recommend this to anyone who needs a little bit of extra encouragement in their life.
Profile Image for Deshaun Williams.
7 reviews
December 20, 2024
Through a blend of personal stories and practical advice, Mand-Lakhiani challenges societal pressures and the pursuit of perfection, encouraging readers to find beauty in their flaws. Her relatable writing and thought-provoking insights make the book both engaging and transformative, offering actionable steps to foster self-acceptance and a deeper understanding of personal worth.
1 review
Want to read
May 26, 2023
Does anyone know where I can read a few chapters of this book before possibly buying?
Profile Image for Gritcan Elena.
899 reviews27 followers
April 4, 2024
I enjoyed a lot. Found a lot of useful info for me, especially the part about self love and self care
Recommend!
Profile Image for Christine Fay.
1,045 reviews49 followers
February 23, 2025
A practical book that will definitely help to treat yourself in a more kindly manner.
Displaying 1 - 17 of 17 reviews

Can't find what you're looking for?

Get help and learn more about the design.