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Woven: Nurturing a Faith Your Kid Doesn't Have to Heal From
In this inspiring parenting book, learn how to create space for your children to get to know God in a way that focuses on trust instead of a list of rigid rules.
Most Christian parenting books are ready with exact practices every family should follow in order to raise obedient children. In this obedience-training model, faith is a wall, constructed brick by brick, as adults tell children what to believe and how to behave.
But what if obedience is not the goal of Christian parenting? What if it’s our job as parents to instead help our kids get to know God and discover that God can be trusted? And what if faith is not constructed brick by brick, but rather woven strand by strand?
Much like a spider’s web, in which anchor strands and internal threads combine to form a unique web, Woven can help children anchor to who God is and have faith practices that are rich, textured, and all their own. Kids need space to explore the Bible, ask big questions, and even change their understanding of God and faith along the way. With Woven, families can nurture the kind of faith that can flex and grow, be broken and repaired. This is the sort of faith that can stand up to the life a child will live, the doubts they will encounter, and the questions that will come up along the way.
So many parents want to pass along their faith, but know that God is so much bigger than the list of do’s and don’ts they were taught about as children. They want to pass along a faith their child doesn’t have to heal from. Woven is the guidebook parents have been looking for. With a deep reverence for scripture and suggested activities to help your family grow in faith together, Woven is for parents who want to go beyond a list of do’s and don’ts and pass along a resilient faith based on genuine love for and trust in God.
Most Christian parenting books are ready with exact practices every family should follow in order to raise obedient children. In this obedience-training model, faith is a wall, constructed brick by brick, as adults tell children what to believe and how to behave.
But what if obedience is not the goal of Christian parenting? What if it’s our job as parents to instead help our kids get to know God and discover that God can be trusted? And what if faith is not constructed brick by brick, but rather woven strand by strand?
Much like a spider’s web, in which anchor strands and internal threads combine to form a unique web, Woven can help children anchor to who God is and have faith practices that are rich, textured, and all their own. Kids need space to explore the Bible, ask big questions, and even change their understanding of God and faith along the way. With Woven, families can nurture the kind of faith that can flex and grow, be broken and repaired. This is the sort of faith that can stand up to the life a child will live, the doubts they will encounter, and the questions that will come up along the way.
So many parents want to pass along their faith, but know that God is so much bigger than the list of do’s and don’ts they were taught about as children. They want to pass along a faith their child doesn’t have to heal from. Woven is the guidebook parents have been looking for. With a deep reverence for scripture and suggested activities to help your family grow in faith together, Woven is for parents who want to go beyond a list of do’s and don’ts and pass along a resilient faith based on genuine love for and trust in God.
257 pages, Kindle Edition
First published August 22, 2023
377 people are currently reading
4402 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 182 reviews
August 23, 2023
"Healing from faith" takes a long time. In fact, I'd say my entire adult life thus far (getting ever closer to 40) has been UNlearning things I'd ingested in my growing-up years. Slowly letting go of shame and self-loathing about who I am and fear that God is punitive and angry. Grieving all the joy and freedom that I missed out on while stuck in cycles of pride, shame, and perfectionism.
Needless to say, I desperately want to somehow circumvent learning at least SOME of these things the hard way.
I came across Meredith Miller on Instagram a while back and began devouring all her content. The way she talks about the Gospel is so much more attractive (and no less true!) than paradigms that start with fear. I gobbled up all her examples of how to present the Bible in age-appropriate ways AND respect the Bible for the complex book that it is, with genres and original audiences that must be explored.
If you have kids in your life that you hope will know and love the real Jesus of the Bible (and not felt-board-Jesus, genie-Jesus, or machine-gun-Jesus (helloooo, USA)), please add this book to your wheelhouse! She lays out a helpful trust-based framework that you can build upon as kids get older. She offers lots of practical ideas and samples of how she might present stories and questions she'd ask to encourage conversation.
And now can I share a quote to show you how beautiful this book is?
"Resilience in faith circles is often misrepresented as something firm and immovable, built brick by brick, each doctrine defined, each principle provided, each application prescribed. Resilience, according to the spider, is drawn out of the ability to flex in order to withstand stress, to bend in significant ways without breaking. It is also the ability to reweave the broken strands, so as not to lose your home, and to do so without becoming too exhausted to go on.
Woven faith is resilient faith.
Woven faith, anchored to who God is, and yet uniquely shaped, has the strength to withstand real life. When the internal strands are pliable, change and challenges don't destroy. To be sure, the process of revisiting, questioning, and at times reimagining how those strands connect is stressful. But it's the stress of strength. And yes, inevitably, some strands will break, beliefs we used to hold and don't anymore. The breaking of the strand is a loss, to be sure. We grieve it, but it doesn't need to be the end."
Thank you, Meredith, for naming what so many of us have been weaving and re-weaving as adults, and for helping us imagine helping our kids build a woven faith from the start.
Needless to say, I desperately want to somehow circumvent learning at least SOME of these things the hard way.
I came across Meredith Miller on Instagram a while back and began devouring all her content. The way she talks about the Gospel is so much more attractive (and no less true!) than paradigms that start with fear. I gobbled up all her examples of how to present the Bible in age-appropriate ways AND respect the Bible for the complex book that it is, with genres and original audiences that must be explored.
If you have kids in your life that you hope will know and love the real Jesus of the Bible (and not felt-board-Jesus, genie-Jesus, or machine-gun-Jesus (helloooo, USA)), please add this book to your wheelhouse! She lays out a helpful trust-based framework that you can build upon as kids get older. She offers lots of practical ideas and samples of how she might present stories and questions she'd ask to encourage conversation.
And now can I share a quote to show you how beautiful this book is?
"Resilience in faith circles is often misrepresented as something firm and immovable, built brick by brick, each doctrine defined, each principle provided, each application prescribed. Resilience, according to the spider, is drawn out of the ability to flex in order to withstand stress, to bend in significant ways without breaking. It is also the ability to reweave the broken strands, so as not to lose your home, and to do so without becoming too exhausted to go on.
Woven faith is resilient faith.
Woven faith, anchored to who God is, and yet uniquely shaped, has the strength to withstand real life. When the internal strands are pliable, change and challenges don't destroy. To be sure, the process of revisiting, questioning, and at times reimagining how those strands connect is stressful. But it's the stress of strength. And yes, inevitably, some strands will break, beliefs we used to hold and don't anymore. The breaking of the strand is a loss, to be sure. We grieve it, but it doesn't need to be the end."
Thank you, Meredith, for naming what so many of us have been weaving and re-weaving as adults, and for helping us imagine helping our kids build a woven faith from the start.
May 14, 2024
I would definitely recommend any parent who is looking for ways to nurture your children’s faith read this book! Very encouraging and gives applicable practices to try with your kids/families.
July 26, 2025
What a beautiful, hopeful, encouraging book! I desire so deeply for my children to know and love the Lord for themselves, and thus the temptation can be to focus on how to act or what to do, but this powerful book was an excellent reminder that our focus should be on who God is rather than how we act or what we know. I cannot recommend it highly enough. It's kind and liberating and a beautiful reminder of what is true. Absolutely worth returning to. Loved this!
February 12, 2025
Honestly a must read for every parent wanting to share their faith with their kids in a way that will nurture love and trust for God and make room for questions that come up along the way.
“I’m done with the hollow promise that if we just use the Bible to raise good kids and point to Jesus as the reason they should behave, then they will be good kids, and they will behave. They might not. But beyond that, I’m done with the hollowness of using the Bible and using Jesus. I want my kids to know Jesus. Really know what He is like so that not only can they hear the invitation, but they also are excited to say yes to joining him in the work of restoring all things.”
“I’m done with the hollow promise that if we just use the Bible to raise good kids and point to Jesus as the reason they should behave, then they will be good kids, and they will behave. They might not. But beyond that, I’m done with the hollowness of using the Bible and using Jesus. I want my kids to know Jesus. Really know what He is like so that not only can they hear the invitation, but they also are excited to say yes to joining him in the work of restoring all things.”
January 1, 2025
SO GOOD. I’ll definitely be revisiting this one. It felt needed and incredibly helpful.
August 21, 2023
In Woven, Meredith Miller primarily writes to an audience who are people who the church has hurt, are in the process of deconstructing their religious experience, but don't want to abandon their faith or alienate it from their children altogether. Denouncing moralism, obedience training, and avoiding religion altogether, she teaches parents how to present God as trustworthy and approachable to their children, even when they may not be so sure themselves.
Here's what I identified as the thesis of her book, "This [what she calls "weaving"] is a way of living your ordinary life joyfully and sustainably, aligned with God's character but in your own creative way, while at the same time not seeking to control your child's faith experience or force a specific outcome... Your family needs a faith culture all its own..." "Weaving" refers to creating a stable web of faith by primarily considering your family's needs rather than abiding by an "exact regimen every family should follow" prescribed by the church.
While this initially came across as an encouragement to distance oneself from orthodox faith practices from Scripture and historic confessions/traditions, I don't think that's her full-intention. She advocates for Biblical exploration that "[stays] within developmental capabilities," does not reduce Bible stories to a simple moral, keeps God and His character in focus, and invites children to interpret, question, and make connections. She encourages prayer (that can take different forms like drawing), service (like composting), and all other rituals (dare I say, "liturgies") that collectively anchor the family in who God is and make the children aware of our connection with Him.
Recently, I visited a church where the pastor said (nearly verbatim), "If you don't spend two hours in prayer, you need to consider what else you're prioritizing." And later, "Your giving to the church should increase over time as your commitment to Jesus grows. Maybe you give $100 a week now, but you should consider giving more later." Church leaders creating manipulative rules for attendance, serving, etc., that go beyond what is prescribed in the Bible is a flagrant abuse of God's people. God has outlined for His people what is required (baseline) for practicing our faith and His ministers, our spiritual guides, ought to abide by them. Unfortunately, that does not always happen, and many suffer the consequences.
God has standards. The danger here is creating what we think is good for ourselves. God lovingly outlining what is good (keeping the Sabbath by attending church, teaching children sound theology, etc.) and being wisely advised in keeping these commandments by a healthy church is life's greatest blessing. Even though we may have been burdened by leaders who required things of us that God did not require, it's not a reason not to do the things God is telling us to do.
Let's not find ourselves in either category: the ones who manipulate the standards to abuse others or those who think themselves above God's standards and create our own.
Here's what I identified as the thesis of her book, "This [what she calls "weaving"] is a way of living your ordinary life joyfully and sustainably, aligned with God's character but in your own creative way, while at the same time not seeking to control your child's faith experience or force a specific outcome... Your family needs a faith culture all its own..." "Weaving" refers to creating a stable web of faith by primarily considering your family's needs rather than abiding by an "exact regimen every family should follow" prescribed by the church.
While this initially came across as an encouragement to distance oneself from orthodox faith practices from Scripture and historic confessions/traditions, I don't think that's her full-intention. She advocates for Biblical exploration that "[stays] within developmental capabilities," does not reduce Bible stories to a simple moral, keeps God and His character in focus, and invites children to interpret, question, and make connections. She encourages prayer (that can take different forms like drawing), service (like composting), and all other rituals (dare I say, "liturgies") that collectively anchor the family in who God is and make the children aware of our connection with Him.
Recently, I visited a church where the pastor said (nearly verbatim), "If you don't spend two hours in prayer, you need to consider what else you're prioritizing." And later, "Your giving to the church should increase over time as your commitment to Jesus grows. Maybe you give $100 a week now, but you should consider giving more later." Church leaders creating manipulative rules for attendance, serving, etc., that go beyond what is prescribed in the Bible is a flagrant abuse of God's people. God has outlined for His people what is required (baseline) for practicing our faith and His ministers, our spiritual guides, ought to abide by them. Unfortunately, that does not always happen, and many suffer the consequences.
God has standards. The danger here is creating what we think is good for ourselves. God lovingly outlining what is good (keeping the Sabbath by attending church, teaching children sound theology, etc.) and being wisely advised in keeping these commandments by a healthy church is life's greatest blessing. Even though we may have been burdened by leaders who required things of us that God did not require, it's not a reason not to do the things God is telling us to do.
Let's not find ourselves in either category: the ones who manipulate the standards to abuse others or those who think themselves above God's standards and create our own.
September 4, 2023
Thanks to Worthy Publishing for the eARC.
This is a book I will keep coming back to because it was so rich in information and helpful ways to help develop a family's faith pattern and their own web. I loved this analogy of building a web over a wall. It was so helpful for me to use this to help me consider my own family's potential web and what is important. As someone who came to faith as an adult and not a child, I found this to be so helpful as a starting point for teaching my child about my faith. I am wanting to keep things open and spiral the learning and Miller so expertly lends her expertise on how to start this so it is doable for everyone in the family. I know I will read this again, and I can't wait to implement some of these ideas now going forward.
This is a book I will keep coming back to because it was so rich in information and helpful ways to help develop a family's faith pattern and their own web. I loved this analogy of building a web over a wall. It was so helpful for me to use this to help me consider my own family's potential web and what is important. As someone who came to faith as an adult and not a child, I found this to be so helpful as a starting point for teaching my child about my faith. I am wanting to keep things open and spiral the learning and Miller so expertly lends her expertise on how to start this so it is doable for everyone in the family. I know I will read this again, and I can't wait to implement some of these ideas now going forward.
November 20, 2023
I loved this hopeful exploration of how to pass on faith to our children!!
I grew up in an extremely conservative Baptist family, and in adulthood have struggled to let go of some of those cultural restrictions while keeping my faith.
Miller offers a gentle, thoughtful look at how to introduce our kids to God in age appropriate ways. The goal is not a “foundation” of faith (which can break), but a “web” of faith that can be stretched and strained and still retain its strength.
HIGHLY HIGHLY recommended.
I grew up in an extremely conservative Baptist family, and in adulthood have struggled to let go of some of those cultural restrictions while keeping my faith.
Miller offers a gentle, thoughtful look at how to introduce our kids to God in age appropriate ways. The goal is not a “foundation” of faith (which can break), but a “web” of faith that can be stretched and strained and still retain its strength.
HIGHLY HIGHLY recommended.
February 6, 2024
LOVED! I know I will be revisiting this book often.
October 8, 2024
An excellent book and resource for those of us trying to navigate this world of faith with gentleness and respect for our kids’ own processes. Such a helpful metaphor, too, of how webs are built of strands — some that withstand the test of time and tension, others that experience a break and are never meant to be built out the same. There’s so much freedom in figuring out what knowing God looks like for your family and your specific kids. I love the grace that comes with reading this, nothing pressure-filled or too high to obtain. Just plain, approachable, relatable ways to find and introduce a God who is kind, patient, able to handle all our questions and concerns and feelings. I loved this book and found it very healing for my own inner child, too. The subtitle says it all: nurturing a faith your child doesn’t have to heal from. 🤌🏼
August 1, 2024
I ordered a physical copy before I even finished the audiobook I was borrowing from the library. If you know me, you know that's a big deal. I almost never read physical copies. But this is a *literally* noteworthy book for all parents of faith seeking to help their children own their own faith journey.
April 18, 2025
4.5 ⭐️ rounded up! One of the best parenting books I will ever read & reread. Love the visual of weaving a “faith web” for our family rather than building a “faith wall.” Highly encourage all families of faith to read.
November 7, 2023
As a child, Sunday mornings were filled with scrambling to memorize my verses, practice any readings I would have to give, and find my Sunday’s best.
In a day and age where "deconstruction" comes with all sorts of baggage, Meredith Miller names this in her new book "Woven: Nurturing a Faith Your Kid Doesn't Have to Heal from." Many millennial parents find themselves disenfranchised by the church, dealing with trauma and abuse, or over the lack of advocacy for the marginalized, and "we find ourselves standing amid the rubble of our former faith, wondering how we will ever rebuild."
Meredith Miller encourages parents that there is a way, a better way, to introduce their kids to God even when our understanding of God now isn't a perfect match to the God we believed in our childhood.
Pick up this book whether you have walked many years with Jesus or are unsure about your journey. My faith has been refreshed and strengthened through it.
As a mom, I've wondered, how can I do this? How can I invest in my kids spiritually when I'm not sure of everything and I'm on my own journey of wrestling with things? Yet Miller encourages me and any others that pick up this book, "we have the ability to be a companion to our children as they get to know God too. That's true even if we are learning alongside them."
For those leading children's ministries, parents, deconstructors, and those still sitting faithfully in church pews, this book is for all of us.
The book includes two main parts. The first delves into how to nurture a healthy faith by providing a different framework beyond moralism. The second part works to equip us in how to anchor our children in the character of God, like the practice of mining Scripture to help our kids learn how to see God as the center of it. Unlike some curriculum that may have taught us to have faith like David, Miller redirects us to the true hero, God. There are reflection prompts, practical helps and tools, and a way to put everything together in a way that works for your family. I also appreciated questions and thoughts that considered everyday struggles or questions like, What if I cannot offer the biblical truth they need? The book provides a different take on biblical applications than I've seen in other children's curriculums. For example, when focusing on the goodness of God, Miller uses Genesis 1 to talk about creation care and how God brought order to chaos.
Miller unpacks the common parenting method that promotes moralism and points us back to Scripture, "Jesus wanted children to be able to come to him. Not to follow his rules, but to know him." She reminds us that we just need to offer time and space for our children to experience and know God, and the weight we may put on ourselves can lift. Their relationship with God is really and always will be their own. My job as a parent is to come alongside them with strategies that support them in their faith journey. There is freedom in how we do this, and we just need to slow down to our children's pace, welcome their questions, and guide them along the way.
In "Woven," Meredith Miller guides readers to consider our faith journey as part of a web. This idea makes a difference because instead of a wall, you don't have to tear it all down and build up. Instead, strands break or may need replacing, but we can always be reweaving. For someone who needs certainty and thrives on completion, this is hard but also freeing. It reminds me that my "deconstruction" journey is more about reweaving as I go on rather than tossing out everything I ever knew.
Miller writes that "anchor threads affix to who God is, including the attributes that live in mysterious, dynamic tension with one another. Internal threads- habits; less essential, but still important beliefs; faith practices; life rhythms - give our faith unique shape".
She goes on, "if faith is a web, its strongest anchor strands, the ones that give it structure, are connected to who God is. As parents, then, we help our kids discover who God is, what God's like, so they can establish those anchor strands for themselves over time." This releases me from the pressure of making sure I have built a strong foundation and just walk alongside my daughters - trusting the rest to the Lord.
So how do we do this? In the book, Miller encourages us that this is an ongoing process where we're answering, how will we follow Jesus together?
Our job is to "Be with our kids as they get to know God and discover if God can be trusted."
For a recovering Perfectionist and Control Freak, I felt the pressure as a Christian mom getting dismantled as Miller repeatedly points us to God and the call to nurture our children's faith–not try to take on the conversion work which only the Spirit can do. This book is a must-read. It challenged my perspective on parenting and guiding my kids spiritually for the better, and it also nurtured my own faith. I feel more equipped and free to come alongside my children, meet them where they are, and trust God to do his work in our family web of faith.
In a day and age where "deconstruction" comes with all sorts of baggage, Meredith Miller names this in her new book "Woven: Nurturing a Faith Your Kid Doesn't Have to Heal from." Many millennial parents find themselves disenfranchised by the church, dealing with trauma and abuse, or over the lack of advocacy for the marginalized, and "we find ourselves standing amid the rubble of our former faith, wondering how we will ever rebuild."
Meredith Miller encourages parents that there is a way, a better way, to introduce their kids to God even when our understanding of God now isn't a perfect match to the God we believed in our childhood.
Pick up this book whether you have walked many years with Jesus or are unsure about your journey. My faith has been refreshed and strengthened through it.
As a mom, I've wondered, how can I do this? How can I invest in my kids spiritually when I'm not sure of everything and I'm on my own journey of wrestling with things? Yet Miller encourages me and any others that pick up this book, "we have the ability to be a companion to our children as they get to know God too. That's true even if we are learning alongside them."
For those leading children's ministries, parents, deconstructors, and those still sitting faithfully in church pews, this book is for all of us.
The book includes two main parts. The first delves into how to nurture a healthy faith by providing a different framework beyond moralism. The second part works to equip us in how to anchor our children in the character of God, like the practice of mining Scripture to help our kids learn how to see God as the center of it. Unlike some curriculum that may have taught us to have faith like David, Miller redirects us to the true hero, God. There are reflection prompts, practical helps and tools, and a way to put everything together in a way that works for your family. I also appreciated questions and thoughts that considered everyday struggles or questions like, What if I cannot offer the biblical truth they need? The book provides a different take on biblical applications than I've seen in other children's curriculums. For example, when focusing on the goodness of God, Miller uses Genesis 1 to talk about creation care and how God brought order to chaos.
Miller unpacks the common parenting method that promotes moralism and points us back to Scripture, "Jesus wanted children to be able to come to him. Not to follow his rules, but to know him." She reminds us that we just need to offer time and space for our children to experience and know God, and the weight we may put on ourselves can lift. Their relationship with God is really and always will be their own. My job as a parent is to come alongside them with strategies that support them in their faith journey. There is freedom in how we do this, and we just need to slow down to our children's pace, welcome their questions, and guide them along the way.
In "Woven," Meredith Miller guides readers to consider our faith journey as part of a web. This idea makes a difference because instead of a wall, you don't have to tear it all down and build up. Instead, strands break or may need replacing, but we can always be reweaving. For someone who needs certainty and thrives on completion, this is hard but also freeing. It reminds me that my "deconstruction" journey is more about reweaving as I go on rather than tossing out everything I ever knew.
Miller writes that "anchor threads affix to who God is, including the attributes that live in mysterious, dynamic tension with one another. Internal threads- habits; less essential, but still important beliefs; faith practices; life rhythms - give our faith unique shape".
She goes on, "if faith is a web, its strongest anchor strands, the ones that give it structure, are connected to who God is. As parents, then, we help our kids discover who God is, what God's like, so they can establish those anchor strands for themselves over time." This releases me from the pressure of making sure I have built a strong foundation and just walk alongside my daughters - trusting the rest to the Lord.
So how do we do this? In the book, Miller encourages us that this is an ongoing process where we're answering, how will we follow Jesus together?
Our job is to "Be with our kids as they get to know God and discover if God can be trusted."
For a recovering Perfectionist and Control Freak, I felt the pressure as a Christian mom getting dismantled as Miller repeatedly points us to God and the call to nurture our children's faith–not try to take on the conversion work which only the Spirit can do. This book is a must-read. It challenged my perspective on parenting and guiding my kids spiritually for the better, and it also nurtured my own faith. I feel more equipped and free to come alongside my children, meet them where they are, and trust God to do his work in our family web of faith.
June 21, 2025
so so good!! you don’t have to be a parent to really enjoy this, but I’m sure I’d enjoy even more if I was. This was refreshing for my faith!
July 25, 2025
I genuinely appreciate how the author lovingly challenges us to expand our concepts of God as it pertains to passing on our faith to our children and fostering families of faith. Well written, well researched, backed by scripture, and genuinely pointing towards a true, livable, authentic relationship with Christ.
October 5, 2023
The subtitle of Woven got me. Who doesn't want to nurture a faith in our kids that they don't have to heal from?
The audience for this book is parents who are somewhere on the deconstruction spectrum themselves and trying to figure out how to talk to their kids about religion without the religious trauma many of us have. We want a better, more nuanced way to share faith with our kids. But like Meredith says, being reactive—just doing the opposite of what we were taught—or not saying anything aren’t effective. So, what is the alternative?
Part I on how to nurture a healthy faith was very helpful. I really like Meredith’s analogy of weaving a faith web that stands up to stress rather than laying a strong foundation of walls. I loved the emphasis on a trust-based paradigm rather than obedience-based. Her lesson on spiral learning and how to approach Bible stories was illuminating. Although these concepts were new to me, they are in line with what I know about child development and how kids learn. I liked her questions to consider and the exercises she guides you through to apply these concepts.
Part II was on six attributes of God and how to share those with your kids. This part was more influenced by the author’s progressive theology, so the Bible concepts as well as the applications to illustrate those concepts, will resonate most with Christians who identify as progressive. For example, the author does not believe sin separates us from Jesus. The chapter on God’s justice focuses on how God wants to fix the injustice in the world through us—our actions to make the world more equitable for the marginalized. These efforts certainly honor God and love our neighbor, but will seem incomplete to Christian readers who put more emphasis on Jesus’ reconciling work in the atonement.
The last chapter helps you solidify the concepts and put them all together in a personalized plan for what works for your family. Instead of a one-size-fits-all approach, the author guides you to consider your family’s season, personality, and values as you derive a plan for integrating faith into your conversations.
I recommend this book to open-minded Christians looking for alternative ways to frame faith for their kids, inspire critical thinking, and make space for questions.
The audience for this book is parents who are somewhere on the deconstruction spectrum themselves and trying to figure out how to talk to their kids about religion without the religious trauma many of us have. We want a better, more nuanced way to share faith with our kids. But like Meredith says, being reactive—just doing the opposite of what we were taught—or not saying anything aren’t effective. So, what is the alternative?
Part I on how to nurture a healthy faith was very helpful. I really like Meredith’s analogy of weaving a faith web that stands up to stress rather than laying a strong foundation of walls. I loved the emphasis on a trust-based paradigm rather than obedience-based. Her lesson on spiral learning and how to approach Bible stories was illuminating. Although these concepts were new to me, they are in line with what I know about child development and how kids learn. I liked her questions to consider and the exercises she guides you through to apply these concepts.
Part II was on six attributes of God and how to share those with your kids. This part was more influenced by the author’s progressive theology, so the Bible concepts as well as the applications to illustrate those concepts, will resonate most with Christians who identify as progressive. For example, the author does not believe sin separates us from Jesus. The chapter on God’s justice focuses on how God wants to fix the injustice in the world through us—our actions to make the world more equitable for the marginalized. These efforts certainly honor God and love our neighbor, but will seem incomplete to Christian readers who put more emphasis on Jesus’ reconciling work in the atonement.
The last chapter helps you solidify the concepts and put them all together in a personalized plan for what works for your family. Instead of a one-size-fits-all approach, the author guides you to consider your family’s season, personality, and values as you derive a plan for integrating faith into your conversations.
I recommend this book to open-minded Christians looking for alternative ways to frame faith for their kids, inspire critical thinking, and make space for questions.
March 13, 2025
incredibly helpful and practical thoughts on how to raise kids in a faith that actually gets to know God for who he is. love love love & would recommend for all moms
September 2, 2024
I really really liked this one. While I've had some church hurt myself, I had the safe spaces to process it and find faith on my own, which isn't everyone's story. Miller's central premise is that most of Western Christianity is morality based (obey God by doing X and Y or else you're sinning and we all know what happens to sinners). Instead, she encourages parents to help their children build a web of faith with a lot of supports, so that when one strand breaks, the web still holds and the broken part can be rewoven in time. Her ideas are practical-- she does not advocate to sit around and have nightly family Bible study which in my early parenthood was what the church I attended advocated-- and she is big on doing what works for your family when it works for your family. She's open to children having questions parents can't answer, and her thoughts on tithes were also interesting. Overall, it was refreshing to read, although at times I wished I would've had this book 10 or so years ago when my kiddos were really litte.
February 19, 2024
A friend of mine said that if she could recommend any book for all faith formation people to read right now it would be this one and I couldn’t agree more! This book is so needed for parents, children’s directors, youth ministers, teachers, and all other adults involved in faith formation in some way. Incredible read.
October 14, 2025
I wish I’d read this when my kids were younger, but I still really appreciate it now. It was a lovely and inspiring way to think about raising children in faith tradition without making it about compliance/obedience/behavior.
Some key takeaways for me:
- the God of the Bible is a life giving God and the Jesus we meet in Scripture can be trusted
- Web analogy: “spiders webs are considered incredibly strong, not because they rigidly withstand the elements, but because they can bend without breaking in the face of them”. In our faith, anchor threads connect to who God is and internal threads our our habits, beliefs, that make our faith unique
- Spiral Learning - circle around a key concept over and over, adding more complexity as we go; rather than a “one and done” approach
- God-centered storytelling
- Example anchor threads: God is good, God is power, God is just, God is joyful, God is with us, Jesus is Lord
- “All too often we get stuck in how Gods power could provide for us in a situation without also considering how Gods presence can carry us THRU a situation”
- “Our God is an Exodus God, so we will be Jubilee people. God goes first to rescue us, so we respond by being restorers to one another”
- 2 common traps on the path to joy: idolizing personal happiness (joy is for all), and the trap of despondency (“how can I have joy in the midst of the worlds bad?”)
- Don’t be scared to welcome your kids into reexamining their inherited faith. It’s necessary.
Some key takeaways for me:
- the God of the Bible is a life giving God and the Jesus we meet in Scripture can be trusted
- Web analogy: “spiders webs are considered incredibly strong, not because they rigidly withstand the elements, but because they can bend without breaking in the face of them”. In our faith, anchor threads connect to who God is and internal threads our our habits, beliefs, that make our faith unique
- Spiral Learning - circle around a key concept over and over, adding more complexity as we go; rather than a “one and done” approach
- God-centered storytelling
- Example anchor threads: God is good, God is power, God is just, God is joyful, God is with us, Jesus is Lord
- “All too often we get stuck in how Gods power could provide for us in a situation without also considering how Gods presence can carry us THRU a situation”
- “Our God is an Exodus God, so we will be Jubilee people. God goes first to rescue us, so we respond by being restorers to one another”
- 2 common traps on the path to joy: idolizing personal happiness (joy is for all), and the trap of despondency (“how can I have joy in the midst of the worlds bad?”)
- Don’t be scared to welcome your kids into reexamining their inherited faith. It’s necessary.
September 5, 2025
"Trust changes us. It shapes our identity — our way of being in the world. If healthy obedience ever happens, it's because it's animated by trust. When it comes to our kids we have to be clear — it's backwards to ask a child to obey a God they do not know. Childhood is for getting to know God so they can discover whether God can be trusted."
I feel a tenderness towards this book. I went into it hoping it would support me as a parent, and got more than I could have hoped for. It has healed and freed parts of me I didn't know needed healing and freeing.
Some of the key tenets I appreciated:
• Focus on a "trust-based paradigm" instead of a "obedience-based paradigm"
• Calling out the issues with a moralistic faith
• Discussion on age-appropriate teachings/approaches (more isn't always more)
• Reflection on saviourism
On moralistic faith: "We end up using the Bible as if it was a morality producing manual, instead of the story that reveals who God is. What often gets called obedience is actually moralism. Teaching kids to 'be' good rather than helping them get to know the God who 'is' good."
Thank you, Meredith, for a book I didn't know I needed.
Audiobook: 6h 9m
I feel a tenderness towards this book. I went into it hoping it would support me as a parent, and got more than I could have hoped for. It has healed and freed parts of me I didn't know needed healing and freeing.
Some of the key tenets I appreciated:
• Focus on a "trust-based paradigm" instead of a "obedience-based paradigm"
• Calling out the issues with a moralistic faith
• Discussion on age-appropriate teachings/approaches (more isn't always more)
• Reflection on saviourism
On moralistic faith: "We end up using the Bible as if it was a morality producing manual, instead of the story that reveals who God is. What often gets called obedience is actually moralism. Teaching kids to 'be' good rather than helping them get to know the God who 'is' good."
Thank you, Meredith, for a book I didn't know I needed.
Audiobook: 6h 9m
October 25, 2024
This is an interesting review to write, because I never thought I was one of those. One of those people who has to heal from faith. And yet, as I have grown and matured and had a daughter of my own....I realize that I have gone through my own faith journey. My journey through legalism, a journey towards grace. A faith that is founded more on God than on the teachings of men who think they can interpret the Bible for me. (Side note: I can hear God's voice thank you very much!) I have had my own walls torn down and needed to be rebuilt, so the analogy of likening faith to a spider's web made LOADS of sense.
You see, I still have my faith. It's one of the most important things to me. It frames my life. However, it has grown and changed and I have bent but not broken. Soli Deo Gloria alone because it is not due to me. Goodness, I could have left the faith (especially when I saw how wrong the Biblical patriarchy was and how men I knew abused it.) But I didn't. And I want my daughter to go to the foot of the Cross rather than the feet of others. I want her to learn truth because she has read THE TRUTH.
So while I didn't agree 100 percent with this book, because doctrinally I'm a little different, there was a lot of good. Namely teaching your child about God and who HE is fundamentally. I am adding this book to my own list to now underline and put into practice.
You see, I still have my faith. It's one of the most important things to me. It frames my life. However, it has grown and changed and I have bent but not broken. Soli Deo Gloria alone because it is not due to me. Goodness, I could have left the faith (especially when I saw how wrong the Biblical patriarchy was and how men I knew abused it.) But I didn't. And I want my daughter to go to the foot of the Cross rather than the feet of others. I want her to learn truth because she has read THE TRUTH.
So while I didn't agree 100 percent with this book, because doctrinally I'm a little different, there was a lot of good. Namely teaching your child about God and who HE is fundamentally. I am adding this book to my own list to now underline and put into practice.
September 22, 2025
an incredible invitation to change your perspective. to doing it slightly different a dare i say healthier. I enjoyed every page, like a mouthful of cereal watching Saturday morning cartoons as a 7year old. this was both a gift and a challenge and i cannot wait to apply what i’ve read to real life. highly recommend this book. 11/10.
April 8, 2025
A book i’ll reference for years to come❤️😭. Thank you to Meredith for helping me weave strands that will build a deep faith for my family and I. I feel more equipped to help my kiddo know(not behave & comply) Jesus.
May 22, 2025
I loved that this book had practical ways to nurture your child’s faith. It moved from theory to application which is not always the case in these types of books. I also loved the last chapter and the idea of adapting and tweaking things as you go and your season changes.
There were certainly a few things I didn’t agree with or would choose to do differently in my family/discipling my children but it was easy to look past these pieces and still take a lot away from this book.
There were certainly a few things I didn’t agree with or would choose to do differently in my family/discipling my children but it was easy to look past these pieces and still take a lot away from this book.
July 24, 2025
Not very applicable to my childless state right now, but this made me reexamine my own faith and upbringing, and I’ll definitely be revisiting this when I have kids of my own.
March 2, 2024
There are perhaps countless books, predominantly from millennials, who have deconstructed their faith and lived to tell the tale. But there are enough of those books and this book is thankfully not that. The author offers a gentle approach for parents and churches on introducing faith to children in a respectful (to children) way that encourages and delights in exploration.
August 17, 2024
My new “must read” for parents and people who love littles! So glad Meredith narrates the audiobook herself, two words in and you know she’s spent time with kiddos herself.
The title tells you everything you need to know - cannot say more other than please enjoy!!
The title tells you everything you need to know - cannot say more other than please enjoy!!
August 6, 2024
Listened on audiobook: Good general parenting tips. Wouldn’t really say anything stuck out in a big way or will change my parenting approach. Provides a nice framework to start to think about how you plan spiritual practices with your kids.
November 15, 2025
This book was thoughtful both in theory AND practice about what it looks like to nurture a curious faith in your kids. Loved the “God is just”, “God is joyful”, and “God is with us” chapters — insightful and healing.
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