The great project of Anais Nin's life, her diaries, takes on a hall of mirrors quality in this volume (1955 to 1966) as we witness her editing the diaries THAT WE"RE READING, hoping for publication, pondering the questions of revelation--the concern that she not harm people still living--as well as the sheer weight of all those years, and whether that was the most valuable use ofher writing talent. It's highly gratifying to watch her finally finding a publisher for the highly edited diaries by the end of the volume after decades of struggle to be recognized and properly published.
"Gunther [Stuhlmann, her editor and great believer] was showing the edited diary (eight hundred pages) to publishers. Their reaction was hardly encouraging. Random House, after reading only 150 pages, felt the diaries would not be interesting to enough readers to make possible the scale of publication I had preposed. [the multi-volume work.]." OUCH.
And Peter Israel of Putnam writes her how fascinated he was with the diaries, engrossed, 'like characters in some great Proustian novel.... I have not quite finished these 800 pages but I am most of the way... and I find myself hoping that they never end...." But in the end, he passes, as did William Morrow.
How could she not become dispirited? "No faith in their personal reactions. Always the Sphinx: is this commercial? He will now try it on the salesmen, on the doormen, the elevator man, the night watchman... and then he will ask me to make it more like Candy, or more like Simone de Beauvoir, or more like Mary McCarthy, and yet keep it clean for the Ladies' Home Journal,, and perhaps rewrite it in the third person...make my father a taxi driver, for human interest, and instead of a stillbirth describe nine healthy children... I might perhaps have one of the characters have an alcoholic problem, make Joaquin a dope addict, to be in the trend..."
Nin's struggles for publication and recognition of her writings go back decades. She even founded her own press in order to publish many of her essential works herself--beautifully, but these were difficult to distribute as an independent press (the legendary Gotham Book Mart sold at least half of each edition) but in this volume we finally see a crack in the wall--a fortuitous meeting with Alan Swallow, the Denver publisher and literary visionary who offered her a publication deal for her novels that resembles contemporary author/publisher partnership.
But when it came to the diaries, he understood that his small press would never have the cash or the firepower to adequately launch such an endeavor. When her despair is at its height, "Alan Swallow spoke to Hiram Hayden of Harcourt Brace... Gunther gave a cocktail party. It was as this party that Peter Israel definitely turned down the diary, and Hiram Haydn said to me. "I love it. I will do it."
The first volume of the diary was published in 1966 and its publication met with an acclaim that would finally justify to her the years of devotion, labor and her oft-questioned focus (by herself as much as anyone) on upon herself as her subject matter. Was it neurotic to be so self absorbed? Should she be putting his effort into fiction instead? Morrow questioned her liquid, mysterious, sometimes veiled entries, complaining that it didn't have "the forthrightness and the sense of contact with real people that one expects from a journal. It was all as if it were half-fictionalized even as it was first being set down, and the form into which it has been edited strengthens this impression It reads almost like a loosely constructed novel. In short, we could not see that this would appeal to more than Anais Nin's present devoted but--we think--rather small audience..."
Of course, it was half-fictionalized, but it was her elusive flavor--which was her--that he found baffling.
But the moment was right, and she found her publisher. Who had a daughter, and understood the uniqueness of the project and the author, and was sure his enthusiasm would be shared by others. Which indeed it was.
Since Nin's death, the unexpurgated diaries have emerged, beginning with Henry and June, the content as she wrote it, without her hesitancy to reveal her personal warts, romantic juggling acts and prevarications (she's well known as having to keep a Lie Box so she could keep her stories straight, as shemaintained her marriage to Hugo Guiler through her many lovers and her bigamous second marriage.). I find it fascinating to reread the edited diaries after having read the unexpurgated--to see what Anais felt were the important observations and incidents, and what she felt the need to conceal. The edited diary is a work of art in itself, different from the unexpurgated as a perfume is from a cologne. It's fun to read both. I have not read the most recent unexpurgated volume, lovingly edited into print by Paul Herron in October 2021, which covers these samee years, called The Diary of Others, but look forward to it. But I tend to like to read the edited diary first and then fill in with the unexpurgated.
Volume 6 has real treats. As others have mentioned, Nin--along with other scientists, intellectuals and artists--was involved in the very early psychoanalytical experiments with LSD. It was still legal at the time, and we see the very beginnings of the psychedelia that came to mark the sixties so profoundly. She in fact was not a great fan of drugs as the way to reach the unconscious mind--she felt that the artists and poets had arrived at these states through their artistic experiences, that surrealism and poetry naturally tapped into the unconscious and that it was part of the human being. That as an unpoetic, mechanistic nation, Americans located the dislocation of the experience inside the drug, rather than inside the human being. It was a fascinating time and her response is completely her.
"At one party, Leary discussed a statement he had made, saying that there was no language, no way to describe the LSD experience. I did not agree. I mentioned poets. I mentioned Michaux; I mentioned the surrealists. All unknown to them. They were scientists, not poets. Huxley's plain, precise, methodical report was more trustworthy. They were making links with ancient religions but not with literature. I felt. For a while, it seemed confined to serious, dedicated, intensely scholarly people. It was like the small group around Andre Breton."
A fascinating time.
Anais Nin had a great capacity for friendship, and worked to develop relationships with the people--men and women alike--whom she admired or felt an affinity with. Here are filmmaker Maya Deren, and the novelist Marguerite Young (whose book Miss MacIntosh, My Darling now I have to read), novelist Lesley Blanch (Wilder Shores of Love), wife of Nouveau Roman novelist Romain Gary. Nin's correspondence was stupendous, and she has an uncanny ability to toss off an accurate and penetrating portrait, a landscape, an insight, with a depth and beauty in just a few lines.
Here's her take on aging in 1956--you can see why she was both a feminist hero and also an ambivalent figure, who nevertheless buys into many of the destructive archetypes she can see intellectually, but can't quite adopt. "There is a difference in the gaining of men and women which I hope one day we can eradicate. The aging of a man is accepted. He can age nobly like a prehistoric statue, he can age like a bronze statue, acquire a patina, can have character and quality. We do not forgive a woman gaining. We demand that her beauty never change. That charming, beautiful women I have known, is it because their aging is frowned upon that they do not age nobly?
"Italian women age nobly, Meican women. the culture accepts it. They cease to wear dresses which clash with their bodies and face. The charm of voice, laughter, the animation remain, but because we have associated femininity with silks satin, lace, flower, veil, a woman is not allowed to acquire the beauty of a stone piece. Cornelia Runyon aged I that noble way. There was no defeat, no disintegration but a passing into stone and leather, as if to acquire a statue's quality. The slightest wilting is tragic in women because we make it so. A woman's skin has to rival the flower, her hair has to retain its buoyancy, stinging does not constitute a new kind of beauty, hierarchic, gothic, classical. She can only seem incongruous, condemned, doomed among the silks and the flowers and the perfumes and the chiffon nightgowns, the white negligees. ... [her friend] Caresse Crosby gave me a shock when she appeared in a bright deep red dress, a buoyant dress, froufrou, walking lightly on very high heels, but then her face appeared like a ruined mural, eroded with time. The powder and the lipstick did not adhere to its dryness but seemed about to crumble off. The sadness was that not all of Caresse aged simultaneously; her voice and laughter were younger, and her marvelous enthusiasm for "Citizens of the World."
Yet the volume is also burdened by long correspondences with people I didn't care about--imprisoned writers and other people she was trying to help, she had a weakness for trying to fix people, save them from themselves--and then the anger and disregulation when they didn't adequately respond or appreciate her help.
But this life! I wanted to be there the night she saw a performance--a happening-- at the Museum of Modern Art of a "suicide machine" constructed by the scuptor Jean Tinguely, that shakes itself to pieces and collapses in a fiery heap. Alas, the fire marshal was so alarmed by what he saw that he put it out with a fire extinguisher.
and a wonderful section about the purchase of the Caresse Crosby archive --Caresse had invented the modern brassiere and had become a Peggy Guggenheim type eccentric and supporter of the arts, a close friend of Nin's. The strangeness to imagine your intimate letters to a friend under glass in a library.
"The librarian who was supposed to be interested in purchasing my diary originals is Pinocchio in person, short fat, with thyroid eyes popping with surprise, friendly, warm, expansive, drinking martinis by the dozen. He was gay and playful, though his is in charge of collecting rare books, in control of manuscripts and collections, the one in possession of many secrets, the one who slides open his drawers and shows you letters from James Joyce, Glenway Wescott, D.H. Lawrence, Henry Miller, Crevel, aldington, diaries, first editions, treasures, indiscretions, betrayals sold for gold. He had just purchased Caresse Crosboy's papers. He opened the drawer containing correspondence between caress and kay Boyle. I asked him if Caresse had not sealed these letters. He said: "Oh yes! they are sealed. But showing them to you is not treachery."
"I don't want to read them," I said, having already experienced the shock of seeing all my letters to Caresse under glass. Harry Moore, himself a victim, his letters to someone sold, lying there, with students, researchers, assistant librarians, biographers all over the library. Was this a cemetery, or a Manufacturer of Immortality? It chilled me. Biographers. D.J. Lawrences' contracts with publishers. What race of men feeds on others' lives. And will I be one of them in the unlocked files, with Pinocchio offering a visitor a look Ito the diaries?f "Goodies," says Pinocchio, commenting on those resources in the files. It all gave me a ghostly feeling. I see Miller's letters to Caresse, watercolors, Cartier Bresson photographs, snapshots, a painting fo the Mill, portraits of Caresse and Harry, Harry's diaries in red leather bindings, letters of Glenway Wescott, Tennessee Williams."...
"everything sold, recorded. Because they just bought her collection, the library has no funds for my diaries. And in a way, I feel relieved. To be just, am I not also recording secrets, and the secrets of Caresse's life are here in the diaries. But the activity of the librariens is now affecting writers: they write fewer letters. Beckett's intimate letters were sold at auction in London. A very honorable collector I know, who was a friend of Beckett's, bought the letter sand gifted them back to him. All of us so occupied in living, not aware of records. But letters will be reduced by use of the telephone, cables. Frighening to see one's friends becoming history..."
These volumes are much like one's fabulous grandmother's jewelry boxes overflowing with pieces, heaps of costume jewelry and as many real ones, some tarnished but much that is forever bright.