Someone is eating for two... Full-figured vampire Glory St. Clair thinks things are finally going her way. She's no longer possessed by a demon, the legions of hell aren't on her tail, and her love life is heating up since she managed to reconnect with her maker-and longtime lover-Jeremy Blade.
When a pregnant demon shows up on her doorstep, Glory knows that everything is about to go to hell. Alesa is claiming that the baby she's carrying is Rafe's, conceived while she was inhabiting Glory's body. A clever trap? Or could it be true?
Booties and bibs are the last thing on Glory's mind when she discovers dark secrets from her own forgotten past. Who is she? What is she? And how will the men in her life deal with the fact that she may be more powerful than she knew? One thing is certain. Glory has way more to worry about than fitting into her favorite pair of jeans...
Gerry Bartlett figures that vampires are pretty much like everyone else except for the liquid diet.
Eternity or Mexican food? Tough call.
Gerry’s a native Texan and lives halfway between Houston and Galveston. Pictured with her is her late wonder dog, a Bedlington Terrier named Belle.
When she started writing, she was still teaching and used the pseudonym Lynn McKay. You can probably still find her historical and two romantic suspense books for a penny on-line. Now that she’s no longer in the classroom and discovered the fun of writing about vampires, she uses her real name. Too bad some people think Gerry is a boy's name or short for Geraldine. No, it's not. Really.
She's still writing her Real Vampires series but is back to romantic suspense and contemporaries. Her Texas Heat series starts in Houston, her home town. Then there's her Lone Star Suspense series set in Austin where she went to the University of Texas. She loves the hill country there and brought some of her favorite characters from the Texas Heat series to Austin for the fast-paced suspense in the three books in that series.
You can check out Gerry’s website at gerrybartlett.com to find her blog and articles for writers. Her Perils of Publishing gives the scoop on what happens once "the call" comes. Oh, did you think it would be all roses and champagne? Well, of course it is.
When Gerry's not writing, she's treasure hunting for her antiques business in Alvin. Her favorite finds? Vintage purses and jewelry. It's a struggle not to keep it all. Be sure to sign up for her newsletter for the latest info about her books at http://ymlp.com/xgeyeewwgmgw
Glory St. Clair is a full-figured vampire who owns a vintage clothing store. When she was turned back in 1604 being full-figured was the thing, but not it is not and thin is in. Glory's sire and long time lover, Jeremy Blade, keeps telling her he loves her just the way she is. Like most women she longs to be thin. She tries a new drug the fellow vampire, Ian MacDonald, made that will let a vampire eat real food. But something goes wrong and now she has a bloated stomach that even the day sleep will not fix. For some reason she reacts differently than any of the other vampires everytime she tries one of Ian's drugs. She agrees to let Ian take some blood and try to find out what is going on. What he finds out is a shock to Glory. But the question is, is he telling her the truth or using her to get to Jerry. Trying to fuel the feud between the Campbells ( Jerry's family) and the MacDonalds? On top of all this, Glory gets a surprise vistor, a very pregnant Alesa. Alesa is the demon that possessed Glory ( in Real Vampires Don't Wear Size Six). She claims that Rafe is the father of her child. That when she was inhabiting Glory's body and Glory had sex with Rafe, Alesa was able to get pregnant. Alesa claims she has no place to go since she got kicked out of Hell due to being pregnant. She lets Glory know that while she was inhabiting her body she saw that Glory has some untapped powers.
This is the eigth installment in Ms Bartlett's Real Vampire series. This is a wonderful series. Ms Bartlett keeps each installment fresh. She adds new characters to the mix of the older characters. Once you start reading this book you will not be able to put it down until you get to the end of the book. I read it in one night. The only complaint I have is I wish the books would come faster. This series would make a great movie or tv show. I can't wait for the next book, Real Vampires Know Hips Happen, which will be out March 2013.
1.5 star read here, but rounding up instead of down because of how much I used to love this series. Hadn't read one in awhile because the one before this was pretty bad. This one was worse! Characters that I used to love visiting with now just put my teeth on edge. A ridiculous plot that only got worse with the "big reveal" on Glory's heritage, which is so completely over-the-top as to render it just stupid. The only good thing?? She did "the deed" with Ray. Too long coming on that! I've got at least one more of these around here and I need to get it read so I can be can be done with these books!
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This book is equal parts hilarious and intoxicating. A must read after a book hangover it's perfectly short and a quick read to get you out of a slump.;)
The demon that possessed Glory St. Clair is back. Not only is the demon, Alesa, back, but claims she is pregnant. She says it happened when she possessed Glory. Alesa tells Glory the father is Rafe, and feeling part way responsible Glory gets in touch with Vampire doctor, Ian, who has another surprise for Glory. Her blood isn’t usual vampire blood. This leads into questions about Glory’s own past.
Real Vampires Hate Skinny Jeans is number eight in the Glory St. Clair series. It did a pretty good job of backtracking to tell the reader what has happened in the past, but I think one of the reasons I had some issues with it is because I haven’t followed these characters through the past stuff. At heart this is a light vampire novel.
While Glory deals with the demon (Alesa) she has another problem. Ian tells her that she is not what she thinks she is, and her past might be a lie. The true plot of the novel becomes finding out what Glory is, and making peace with it on more than one level. There are romantic side plots. Three men believe they are in love with Glory and would do anything in the world for her. This is one of the points in which the story lost me. Glory claims to love her sire, but also loves the other two as well. She wants to be with her sire the most, and they are very chummy at the start of the novel. When things go awry she is quick to jump ship to another man.
The characters are what disappointed me. I don’t mind the light hearted and sometimes very steamy scenes loaded into the book. I do mind that the characters fell flat for me. This might be because I haven’t read the others, and don’t have a basis to go on. Glory drives me nuts because she cries at the drop of a hat, and she is far too needy a heroine. She is also fickle when it comes to love, or maybe a little too free in her romantic involvement. Nearly all the male characters in the novel are head over hills for her, and if they are not, they are sexually attracted to her, even the majority of the not so nice ones. Her female friends constantly cater to her. I think all of that bogs down to making them fall a little flat for me.
While the characters and romantic subplot bothered me I will say that the sexy scenes in the novel are sexy. If they are not sexy then they are pretty funny. On another upswing the novel is a light easy read. It took me a while to get through it because of the characters, but it was never hard or dense. There is a good deal of mythology that goes into the story, but there isn’t much of a spin on it. Like a lot of the novel, it felt flat.
All-in-all this wasn’t a book for me. I didn’t like the main character, and didn’t like being in her head. I enjoyed the steamy scenes for what they were, but I don’t think I would read it just for that. I may have felt differently if I had read the books in order and not started with number eight. Then again it is number eight and the main character gets weepy eyed every other page which is too much for me.
The demon that possessed Glory St. Clair is back. Not only is the demon, Alesa, back, but claims she is pregnant. She says it happened when she possessed Glory. Alesa tells Glory the father is Rafe, and feeling part way responsible Glory gets in touch with Vampire doctor, Ian, who has another surprise for Glory. Her blood isn’t usual vampire blood. This leads into questions about Glory’s own past.
Real Vampires Hate Skinny Jeans is number eight in the Glory St. Clair series. It did a pretty good job of backtracking to tell the reader what has happened in the past, but I think one of the reasons I had some issues with it is because I haven’t followed these characters through the past stuff. At heart this is a light vampire novel.
While Glory deals with the demon (Alesa) she has another problem. Ian tells her that she is not what she thinks she is, and her past might be a lie. The true plot of the novel becomes finding out what Glory is, and making peace with it on more than one level. There are romantic side plots. Three men believe they are in love with Glory and would do anything in the world for her. This is one of the points in which the story lost me. Glory claims to love her sire, but also loves the other two as well. She wants to be with her sire the most, and they are very chummy at the start of the novel. When things go awry she is quick to jump ship to another man.
The characters are what disappointed me. I don’t mind the light hearted and sometimes very steamy scenes loaded into the book. I do mind that the characters fell flat for me. This might be because I haven’t read the others, and don’t have a basis to go on. Glory drives me nuts because she cries at the drop of a hat, and she is far too needy a heroine. She is also fickle when it comes to love, or maybe a little too free in her romantic involvement. Nearly all the male characters in the novel are head over hills for her, and if they are not, they are sexually attracted to her, even the majority of the not so nice ones. Her female friends constantly cater to her. I think all of that bogs down to making them fall a little flat for me.
While the characters and romantic subplot bothered me I will say that the sexy scenes in the novel are sexy. If they are not sexy then they are pretty funny. On another upswing the novel is a light easy read. It took me a while to get through it because of the characters, but it was never hard or dense. There is a good deal of mythology that goes into the story, but there isn’t much of a spin on it. Like a lot of the novel, it felt flat.
All-in-all this wasn’t a book for me. I didn’t like the main character, and didn’t like being in her head. I enjoyed the steamy scenes for what they were, but I don’t think I would read it just for that. I may have felt differently if I had read the books in order and not started with number eight. Then again it is number eight and the main character gets weepy eyed every other page which is too much for me. - Beth (Guest Reviewer)
Real Vampires Hate Skinny Jeans is the eighth book in the Glory St. Clair series by Gerry Bartlett and a Berkley Paranormal Romance.
Blurb:
Someone is eating for two...
Full-figured vampire Glory St. Clair thinks things are finally going her way. She's no longer possessed by a demon, the legions of hell aren't on her tail, and her love life is heating up since she managed to reconnect with her maker-and longtime lover-Jeremy Blade.
When a pregnant demon shows up on her doorstep, Glory knows that everything is about to go to hell. Alesa is claiming that the baby she's carrying is Rafe's, conceived while she was inhabiting Glory's body. A clever trap? Or could it be true?
Booties and bibs are the last thing on Glory's mind when she discovers dark secrets from her own forgotten past. Who is she? What is she? And how will the men in her life deal with the fact that she may be more powerful than she knew? One thing is certain. Glory has way more to worry about than fitting into her favorite pair of jeans... My thoughts:
Glory St. Clair has always loved being a vampire - but she has also wished a few things were different. She’d love to be able to eat solid food again and lose those pesky five pounds that bother her. And it would be great if she could shapeshift with ease and oh yeah, eat solid food again.
Her on again off again relationship with her maker, Jeremy, is on again - even though it is a little on the unsteady side after she slept with Rafe. But in her defense Glory was possessed by a demon at the time.
Now said demon has shown up on her doorstep and claims to be pregnant - by Rafe and says it happened while she was in possession of Glory’s body.
Great.
If that weren’t enough, super vampire scientist Ian is claiming that Glory was not human before she was turned into a vampire.
If she wasn’t a human - what was she?
Real Vampires Hate Skinny Jeans is another fun installation in a cute and quirky series. I always enjoy reading about the messes Glory gets herself involved in.
I give Real Vampires Hate Skinny Jeans 4 out of 5 stars.
Product Details Reading level: Ages 18 and up Paperback: 336 pages Publisher: Berkley Trade (April 3, 2012) Language: English ISBN-10: 0425245624 ISBN-13: 978-0425245620
This one is hard to figure. I loved it, but it’s a bit of a switch from the others. It’s kind of an in-between book. The old problems are mostly solved and the new ones haven’t quite blown up yet.
Glory has some personal trouble, but most of it turns out good (except for Jerry. But more on him later). Her other guys are a mixture of good and bad. And the other characters either help or leave. Other than the storm god, there’s no real big baddie and he’s easily taken care of.
In this one all three of her old female enemies show up. Alesa for help with her with her baby’s possible father Rafe and a place to stay. Aggie to show her new ‘sister’ how to use her new abilities. And then there’s Lucky. Seems she’s heard about her sire’s new potential and wants to get in on it.
Flo and Laurie are great. Flo is the best BBF any girl could want, but I wish she’s stay in town more. And Laurie is amazing and well on her way to becoming BBF2. I can’t wait to find out exactly what/who she is. She’s has great allies too.
Jerry is a complete jackass in this one. At first he’s all ‘I’ll stick with you through anything and prove my love is true’ and he almost does. Then when find out what’s going on and she really needs him, he’s upset for being ‘used’ and leaves to ‘think things through’. He should have stayed, but instead he gets mad when he finds Rafe there taking care of her in his place and he runs off to Scotland to pout. His loss. And I don’t blame her for going to Ray for consolation. But then he turns into an idiot also. Glory should just give up on men and stick to pets; non-shifter ones. Penny’s cat is cool.
Thoughts: 1)Jerry’s anger maybe partly guilt at not being there at first when he needed to be.
2)Circe saved the day but she may end up being problem in the future. The big guys never do anything for free.
3)Glory not being human and her blood having special powers sounds like Sookie in ‘True Blood’. Which came first?
4)Daughter of Olympus? Hmmm?
Fave scenes: Laurie confronting Alesa, Jenny finding out about Penny, Glory’s first meeting with the storm god and the Star Trek/Wars room.
Someone is eating for two... Full-figured vampire Glory St. Clair thinks things are finally going her way. She's no longer possessed by a demon, the legions of hell aren't on her tail, and her love life is heating up since she managed to reconnect with her maker-and longtime lover-Jeremy Blade. When a pregnant demon shows up on her doorstep, Glory knows that everything is about to go to hell. Alesa is claiming that the baby she's carrying is Rafe's, conceived while she was inhabiting Glory's body. A clever trap? Or could it be true? Booties and bibs are the last thing on Glory's mind when she discovers dark secrets from her own forgotten past. Who is she? What is she? And how will the men in her life deal with the fact that she may be more powerful than she knew? One thing is certain. Glory has way more to worry about than fitting into her favorite pair of jeans.
Omg, where do I start for this book? I loved it I was curious about what she really was before she was vamped! And I'm so glad things worked out for Rafe, but my heart is still torn who would I chose if I was in the triangle of men Jerry, Rafe, Ray ? that is a hard one. I loved how Gerry let Glory have so fun with Ray Finally! VERY PROUD THAT GLORY IS STARTING TO STAND FOR HERSELF! I read the first chapter in the next book and I'm mad I can't wait until March 2013 :{
Oh the Perils of Gloriana! From the frying pan to the fire, from the fire to the coals, from the coal to hell and back. Poor Glory, she is trying so hard to just have a normal life, well as normal as a 400 year old vampire CAN have. When who should return? The demon from Hell who possessed Glory for a time...and she's pregnant with Glory's old bodyguards child from the time she was in Glory, or so she says. Then her old nemesis Aggie the Siren shows up and rains all over Glory's attempt at a nice life and THEN, Ian MacDonald, the bane of her lover and sire Jeremy Blade, shows up with questions regarding Glory's origins. Was she human before she was turned vampire? Or was she other? A vamp just can't win!
I LOVE that Gerry Bartlett has given our favorite vampire a full figure...that's more "REAL" and believable in this world of paranormal creatures. I LOVE that Glory still has her independence, even though she comes from an era that treated women as chattels. I LOVE the humor that unsinkable, positive attitude Glory has. Now that she knows what she is, she needs to move on to what she wants! And we might just see that in "Real Vampires Know Hip Happens" coming in March of 2013.
Funny Quote: "Twins? Triplets? A litter of demons? Life could not be that cruel."
Full-figured vampire Glory St. Clair thinks things are finally goingher way. She's no longer possessed by a demon, the legions of hell aren't on her tail, and her love life is heating up since she managed to reconnect with her maker-and longtime lover-Jeremy Blade.
When a pregnant demon shows up on her doorstep, Glory knows that everything is about to go to hell. Alesa is claiming that the baby she's carrying is Rafe's, conceived while she was inhabiting Glory's body. A clever trap? Or could it be true?
Booties and bibs are the last thing on Glory's mind when she discovers dark secrets from her own forgotten past. Who is she? What is she? And how will the men in her life deal with the fact that she may be more powerful than she knew? One thing is certain. Glory has way more to worry about than fitting into her favorite pairof jeans...
Our beautiful Glory, she has three wonderful men circling around her. Now, she knows why, and it's not what she thought. She is faced with a truth that drives her to some serious soul searching... I love that her men always save her, and she is still so upbeat about it!
Glory, she has three wonderful men circling around her. Now, she knows why, and it's not what she thought. She is faced with a truth that drives her to some serious soul searching. Is that all that is really was ? Her background before Blade is in question, who and what was she ? She finds a whole new world opening up to her. Her three men-Blade, he has always been there. He would give his life for her. Why can't he let go ? Was it some form of manipulation ? His pain as realization hits him is painful to read. Raffe-the man makes a growl sexy. He does not believe it. It is more than what has been believed. He stands with her, her true friend The Rock Star Ray- He finally gets his shot with Glory. Wahoo it is steamy. But, will she turn away ? He shines in this book. He takes control and gives more than he takes. I loved this new installment n the series. It was a roller coaster ride of screams and thrills. I am very excited to read the next one. There will be groveling, familiar discoveries and travel.
Having gotten rid of a demon who possessed her, Glorianna St. Clair is hoping to make up with her maker and yummy lover Jeremy Blade. Their road to happy loving took a bit of bump when Glory was possessed, but now life is looking rosey…until trouble arrives in the form of a demon who claims she’s pregnant with a baby she conceived with Rafe while she took over Glory’s body.
This is not news that Jeremy welcomes, but Glory wasn’t responsible for what happened. But that’s not the worst of the news. A vampire scientist named Ian insists that Glory wasn’t human when Jeremy turned her into a vampire.
For centuries, Glory has managed to come to terms with her forever bloated body and the fact that she’ll never eat Cheetos or pizza again, but this latest news is tough. She doesn’t even know what she is or was anymore. But then again, the scientist may be trying to stir up an old feud.
Real Vampires Hate Skinny Jeans will charm readers and keep them turning the pages to discover along with Glory the truth about her origins. Another fun and sexy read you’ll want to devour!
Once again, Gerry Bartlett wrote an amazing book about our girl Glory St. Clare. I can relate to her struggle with a few extra pounds and wishing her body was a bit different. I WISH I could relate to her issues with her 3 hot guys! This book had brought back alot of people from Glory's past. They might might not be all her favorite people.... but it was good to see them again. The big thing was her Rock Star made an appearance in this book and they finally hooked up. I was surprised how she just kinda "went with it" and didn't over think her decision like she normally does. I also enjoyed the new spin about learning more about Glory's past that she didn't even know about and I hope we keep on learning what else she has going on inside of her.
The Real Vampire Series is one of my favorite. This was book number 8 and I would recommend this series to the paranormal romance fan who loves humor and HOT guys!
Gosh! I am happy and sad with the latest installment of Glory! Sad that I must now wait til next year for more. Happy that it was SOOOO good. A Siren? How is that a twist for you? I am all for the extra defensive powers, and I love how Glory has become so much stronger as an individual. So sad that Jerry was so hurt. Glad she got the Ray thing out of the way finally. Sad that I know it is going to be an issue when it finally comes up again. Ray is quite the showoff. Worse than Valdez, who I hope hooks up with the were-tiger. I like her!
Also, I was so sad when the book ended because it didn't end with Jerry. I think this is the first one that hasn't. Happy that they put the 1st chapter of the next book in there. While I only got a couple pages of Jer and it had to be tainted with Mara (ick!) and he has no recollection of who Glory is now - at least I know that he loves her still, and she does too. Makes this nerds heart happy.
I thought this one was much better than the last one, but it isn't as good as the first ones in the series. Part of that is my frustration with Glory and her men, not sure if it is me or not. But I am getting tired of the 3 of them expressing their love and her unable to really make a decision. She says she does, but then she goes ahead and sleeps with more than one of them.
I was annoyed with the pregnant demon aspect of the story. The demon annoyed me and it seemed like that story line was dropped quickly and didn't really add much of anything to the rest.
At this point I an not sure what to think of Glory's heritage discovery. All it really did in this book is to cause drama, not much else. I guess I'll have to read the next book to see just what impact this will have on Glory.
I am ready for this series to be over. This book felt like there were 3 different stories that happened through the whole book and they were all a let down. You start with the demon being pregnant and that concluded without any excitement and then you wonder what Glory could actually be and that seemed boring in its discovery as well when you find out that she really is just the same old Glory not a lot of difference. And finally she faces the storm god and in the end he sits down and basically has a heart to heart with her. And then her men, why cant she just pick one and stop stringing the others along. It seems fine to tell them to move on but when you are still making out with them it doesnt appear to be genuine. I just think that this whole series has run its course and it is time to move on.
In every book series, there's always one volume that comes along and changes either the plot, the tone of the series, or the characters as a whole. For the Glory St. Clair series, "Real Vampires Hate Skinny Jeans" fulfills that obligation. Although the book starts out with the return of the demon Alesa and it seems like the story will deal with her, it turns out that's only a minor aspect of the plot. The real story is the discovery of Glory's true heritage- that is, before she was made vampire, she was not fully human. Throw in some hijinks with Glory's loyal band of off-and-on lovers (there's an extremely sexy scene with Ray), the return of Aggie the Siren and Lucky Carver, some Greek gods and goddesses, and you have one entertaining and funny Glory adventure. And there's a great segway into the next book.
I absolutely adore Glory St. Claire as a character and find her to be charming and hilarious. The latest in her series, Real Vampires Hate Skinny Jeans, was a fun addition to the series and I hope will mean there is more to come in this series from author Gerry Bartlett. There was a satisfying ended for this particular novel but I felt there was still some aspects to the series as a whole that are not 100% resolved. There are a lot of fun, return characters in this novel that if you have not read the previous books may make this harder to enjoy. I’ve found that the entire series from Ms. Bartlett has been fun, light, enjoyable reading that I recommend to anyone who loves their vampires sexy with a side of humor.
Omg...Gerry Bartlett has DONE IT AGAIN!!!! I fall in love with Glory all over again every time I read her books. There is just something so great about her. And her new issues?? Just too good...first Alesa (the demon) shows up, then Glory has identity issues?? Add in Aggie coming back and WAYYYYYYYYY more of Ray!! And even LUCKY IS BACK for a bit!!!! I love Glory, Rafe, and Jerry, but I also LOVELOVELOVE Ray and being able to see more of him and NOT him on a bender or practically suicidal is a great thing. I cannot WAIT to read the next book (though I know I will holdout as long as possible because I don't know when I will then get my next fix...) and I just know it will be even BETTER then before!! They just KEEP getting better and I absolutely love them for it!!
interesting twists in this book, but what a slut Glory is. Maybe I just accepted it, but does that girl get around or what. Old characters are back, and things change with some current characters. Things seemed different with Blade not in town for Glory, part of the allure I guess, and usually when she attracts trouble. Miguel is an interesting addition to the story, hopefully more will be revealed in the next book about him. Look forward to the next book and where things go with the Sirens & what happens with Lucky. Of course, looking forward to see what Glory does with all her men. Like her with Rafe the most, but she has a wild side with Ray.
Sort of like reading 2 books in one, the first part about Alesa and her games, the 2nd part about Glory and her men/her past.
Yet again another great novel in the series. I think I will be terribly sad when the series ends for I truly love it. It's always fun and exciting. It's always new too. Not the same old, same old. I love that Glory is surrounded by three men as well. Rafe(Valdez), Jerry & Ray. I wish she could be with all of them, settling in no commitment and I'm horribly sad that she's already pushed Rafe away and says she only wants to be friends. Now she had this epic thing with Ray and she's going after Jerry, someone who walked out of her life when he thought he was being manipulated. He doesn't deserve her at all. I hope Glory sees that.