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The Beast
Lurking in nightmares and ravaging the unsuspecting innocent for millennia, the Beast awaits its approaching hour--a time to possess, destroy, unleash its fury, and quench its bloodlust on the souls of all men. Original.
365 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1994
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Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews
January 22, 2021
For many years Dorchester Publishing operated an imprint called Leisure Books, which specialized in mass market paperbacks for the horror genre. The company folded around 2010, 2011, amid reports of cheating authors out of royalties. But for thirty years they released a ton of books, some by well-known genre writers like Jack Ketchum and Ed Lee. The overall quality varied greatly, however, and some of their authors remain in obscurity for good reason.
There’s a used bookstore in my hometown, that offers quite a selection of horror novels, including several Leisure titles. Willing to spend four bucks on a complete gamble, I picked up a copy of “The Beast,” by Marie Ardell White and James Gordon White. I think the fact that upon finishing this novel I’m still planning to keep it in my collection, means I’ve officially gone from “reader” to “collector.” Specifically, collector of horror paperbacks. Because this is as bad as it gets.
A virtually unknown book, by authors that as far as I’m aware are unknown, “The Beast” seems like a perhaps too-easy target for criticism. But after reading all 365 pages of this massively padded novel, I felt a little insulted, personally offended by this thing. In addition to being an overall dumb story, the writing quality is excruciatingly amateurish. In the opening chapters, when I was still feeling somewhat charitable towards the work of the Whites, it reminded me of an R.L. Stine YA novella from the 90s. After a couple hundred pages (Stine’s books rarely crossed the 200-page mark) I realized that was giving the book far too much credit.
There’s endless repetition. Repeated conversations, and especially emotions. I can almost imagine how the writing process on this went, with two authors writing up independent drafts, then combining them, omitting none of the overlap. And this isn’t some self-published nonsense dressed up to look like a professional job; it was actually released by an at-the-time reputable publisher.
Anyway, here’s the basic plot. Diana has been feeling low ever since the accidental decapitation of her fiancée. At a party she meets a mysterious man named Jonathan Hagar, and immediately falls for him. Her friend Lionel, an older fellow who was close to Diana’s deceased parents, encourages the relationship. Her buddy Alan is overcome with suspicion, however. The suspicion combines with his unrequited love for Diana.
Lionel is a professor of history, and is obsessed with an ancient belief in something he refers to as “the other world”. This “other world,” so important to the plot, is never given a more specific name. Lionel speaks endlessly about learning more about it, and about predictions others have made, and “calculations” never given even a brief overview, related to the other world. Specifically, when this alternate dimension will open and allow its evil beasts into our world.
The book is filled with long, dull conversations, as well as love scenes completely devoid of passion. There are zero scares, and not one suspenseful sentence in the entire book. Character motivations and feelings are constantly addressed. This is a book containing many extra words.
Sample dialogue:
[Alan has suggested Diana might enjoy going with him to Universal Studios.]
Diana smiled. “Do you know that in all these years I have never been on that tour?”
“I thought as much. Like most people here, you rarely take advantage of the many sights the city has to offer.”
“I’m afraid you’re right.”
And a little later on:
[Alan and Diana discussing the “other world.”]
“I would sooner accept little green men from Mars than two-headed beasties,” Alan said lightly, trying not to quarrel and spoil his time with Diana.
“You asked me and I told you,” Diana said, a hint of strain creeping into her casual tone.
“That you did,” Alan said easily, detecting Diana’s growing annoyance and judging that he shouldn’t push things any further, “and I want to thank you for it.” He still found it hard to believe that Diana could buy any of that crap.
The dialogue is like this throughout. Unnecessary mood notations for nearly every thought. Constant updates on the characters’ feelings and emotions.
Check out this paragraph from page 299:
“Diana was an intelligent woman who required a partnership with a man and not just a sexual relationship. Alan was certain that she would not have considered Jonathan as a husband at a less vulnerable time in her life. The strong physical attraction she felt for him was based not only on a need for affection, but on a romantic ideal that all women yearned for. Jonathan was Prince Charming, the epitome of every woman’s fantasy, and Diana was mesmerized by him.”
Ya think? We’re on page two-hundred-fucking-ninety-nine, and if every word of that paragraph isn’t readily apparent by now, then what’s been going on the last twenty-five chapters?
Or, take this one:
“Alan expelled his breath in a heavy oral sigh.”
Is there another kind?
Lionel is a learned man, and boy does he let you know it. Any time Lionel is in a scene, there’s guaranteed to be a good amount of unnatural-sounding exposition and pontificating on all sorts of extraordinarily boring topics. Lionel isn’t a wet mop like Alan, but he’s no less interesting to read about. Diana, the main character, is a complete and utter drag.
There’s little mystery in “The Beast.” The only question you’ll be left with by its conclusion is, Why did Leisure publish this without first assigning someone to edit it? What a mess.
There’s a used bookstore in my hometown, that offers quite a selection of horror novels, including several Leisure titles. Willing to spend four bucks on a complete gamble, I picked up a copy of “The Beast,” by Marie Ardell White and James Gordon White. I think the fact that upon finishing this novel I’m still planning to keep it in my collection, means I’ve officially gone from “reader” to “collector.” Specifically, collector of horror paperbacks. Because this is as bad as it gets.
A virtually unknown book, by authors that as far as I’m aware are unknown, “The Beast” seems like a perhaps too-easy target for criticism. But after reading all 365 pages of this massively padded novel, I felt a little insulted, personally offended by this thing. In addition to being an overall dumb story, the writing quality is excruciatingly amateurish. In the opening chapters, when I was still feeling somewhat charitable towards the work of the Whites, it reminded me of an R.L. Stine YA novella from the 90s. After a couple hundred pages (Stine’s books rarely crossed the 200-page mark) I realized that was giving the book far too much credit.
There’s endless repetition. Repeated conversations, and especially emotions. I can almost imagine how the writing process on this went, with two authors writing up independent drafts, then combining them, omitting none of the overlap. And this isn’t some self-published nonsense dressed up to look like a professional job; it was actually released by an at-the-time reputable publisher.
Anyway, here’s the basic plot. Diana has been feeling low ever since the accidental decapitation of her fiancée. At a party she meets a mysterious man named Jonathan Hagar, and immediately falls for him. Her friend Lionel, an older fellow who was close to Diana’s deceased parents, encourages the relationship. Her buddy Alan is overcome with suspicion, however. The suspicion combines with his unrequited love for Diana.
Lionel is a professor of history, and is obsessed with an ancient belief in something he refers to as “the other world”. This “other world,” so important to the plot, is never given a more specific name. Lionel speaks endlessly about learning more about it, and about predictions others have made, and “calculations” never given even a brief overview, related to the other world. Specifically, when this alternate dimension will open and allow its evil beasts into our world.
The book is filled with long, dull conversations, as well as love scenes completely devoid of passion. There are zero scares, and not one suspenseful sentence in the entire book. Character motivations and feelings are constantly addressed. This is a book containing many extra words.
Sample dialogue:
[Alan has suggested Diana might enjoy going with him to Universal Studios.]
Diana smiled. “Do you know that in all these years I have never been on that tour?”
“I thought as much. Like most people here, you rarely take advantage of the many sights the city has to offer.”
“I’m afraid you’re right.”
And a little later on:
[Alan and Diana discussing the “other world.”]
“I would sooner accept little green men from Mars than two-headed beasties,” Alan said lightly, trying not to quarrel and spoil his time with Diana.
“You asked me and I told you,” Diana said, a hint of strain creeping into her casual tone.
“That you did,” Alan said easily, detecting Diana’s growing annoyance and judging that he shouldn’t push things any further, “and I want to thank you for it.” He still found it hard to believe that Diana could buy any of that crap.
The dialogue is like this throughout. Unnecessary mood notations for nearly every thought. Constant updates on the characters’ feelings and emotions.
Check out this paragraph from page 299:
“Diana was an intelligent woman who required a partnership with a man and not just a sexual relationship. Alan was certain that she would not have considered Jonathan as a husband at a less vulnerable time in her life. The strong physical attraction she felt for him was based not only on a need for affection, but on a romantic ideal that all women yearned for. Jonathan was Prince Charming, the epitome of every woman’s fantasy, and Diana was mesmerized by him.”
Ya think? We’re on page two-hundred-fucking-ninety-nine, and if every word of that paragraph isn’t readily apparent by now, then what’s been going on the last twenty-five chapters?
Or, take this one:
“Alan expelled his breath in a heavy oral sigh.”
Is there another kind?
Lionel is a learned man, and boy does he let you know it. Any time Lionel is in a scene, there’s guaranteed to be a good amount of unnatural-sounding exposition and pontificating on all sorts of extraordinarily boring topics. Lionel isn’t a wet mop like Alan, but he’s no less interesting to read about. Diana, the main character, is a complete and utter drag.
There’s little mystery in “The Beast.” The only question you’ll be left with by its conclusion is, Why did Leisure publish this without first assigning someone to edit it? What a mess.
abandoned
August 30, 2017I'm abandoning this book on page 50 because it is just the worst. It's so, so bad.
October 8, 2024
Honestly I skimmed bits of this. The MFC made me so mad most of the time. I'm sorry no one spends a couple months grieving their "one true love" to *immediately* Moving on with the first handsome face they see. Just... no. Some of it I could see, like the gaslighting and the trauma the MFC experiences, but to me I just couldn't believe how she went from mourning to almost immediately falling for this guy. It left me baffled and completely annoyed with the whole plot.
Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews