Kiss the Dead

Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter #21

by Laurell K. Hamilton

When a fifteen-year-old girl is abducted by vampires, it's up to U.S. Marshal Anita Blake to find her. And when she does, she's faced with something she's never seen a terrifyingly ordinary group of people - kids, grandparents, soccer moms - all recently turned and willing to die to avoid serving a master. And where there's one martyr, there will be more...But even vampires have monsters that they're afraid of. And Anita is one of them...

Genres: Urban Fantasy, Paranormal, Vampires, Fantasy, Romance, Paranormal Romance, Fiction

359 pages, Hardcover

First published June 1, 2012

About the author

Laurell K. Hamilton is one of the leading writers of paranormal fiction. A #1 New York Times bestselling author, Hamilton writes the popular Anita Blake, Vampire Hunter novels and the Meredith Gentry series. She is also the creator of a bestselling comic book series based on her Anita Blake novels and published by Marvel Comics. Hamilton is a full-time writer and lives in the suburbs of St. Louis with her family.

Reviews

[Lorena · Rating 1 out of 5]

I know that my compulsion to hate-read these books is far more perverted than anything Anita ever gets up to in this series, but there it is. I almost feel that I am performing a service for those of you who have had the strength to stop reading the books themselves, yet may feel the danger of back-sliding just to see what is up in the lives of Anita and her horde of vaginal slaves. The answer is nothing. Nothing is up that remotely matters or makes sense.

I'm not going to mark anything in here as a "spoiler," because I don't even know what that means in the context of these books anymore. However, if the fact that I am going to quote parts of the book and that those parts of the book may reveal some of the things that happen in the book will upset you, stop reading now. You have no one but yourself to blame if you continue. Likewise, I guess I should add that if crimes against the profession of editing, the English language, and the Aristotelian Unities upset you, you should also consider yourself warned, because what follows must necessarily be very disturbing, indeed.

Let's first give credit where credit is due...the first half of the book takes place outside of Anita's bedroom, with her doing her job. The Marshal job, anyway. There's a throwaway reference to Animator's, Inc., at one point, mostly to just say that she's never there anymore. Remember how that used to be a thing in this series? But not anymore. This time, Anita is helping break up a hostage situation involving a bunch of vamps who appear to be members of the Undead Tea Party, being composed primarily of old people and near-children who were too young to know what they were doing when they changed over, and only want to yell "FREEDOM!" at everyone else. This is not really all that important, actually. I mean, they provide the background for some of the Dramatic Events in the story that cause Anita to have to kick ass and talk about her weapons and her height and how strong she is like always, but that's it. Consider them not really all that material to the story.

We DO get to walk into the building where they are holed up, though, and get one of those glorious paragraphs where Hamilton tries to get all deep and descriptive, and ends up making no kind of sense whatsoever. To wit:

The room looked like a set for a slasher flick, with dirty walls; pale paint that might have started as white had flaked away from the bricks, so that the paint debris lay at the base of the walls as if something big had clawed at the walls. The question was, had it been clawing to get in, or get out?

First of all, no, that is not the question. Nothing was clawing, in or out. It's just some paint flecks. (Also, if there HAD been clawing, the fact that all of the paint flecks are on the floor inside the building would be a significant clue that the clawing was coming from inside the building as well. I mean, to anyone who happened to be a professional investigator of some sort. Or someone who had ever read a mystery story before.) Finally, way to use the word "walls" THREE TIMES IN ONE SENTENCE. Those familiar with the series will not be surprised to learn that Hamilton's tendency to use the same words repeatedly, and even to seemingly cut and paste whole paragraphs from previous books to re-use several times in the course of each "new" volume has not abated even a little. She also continues her odd quirk of picking a new phrase that everyone in each book suddenly decides to use all the time, in all sorts of situations, and then never use again in subsequent books. In this edition, that phrase is "ass deep in alligators." People cannot stop talking about the damn alligators and their relative proximity to the gluteus maximi of everyone involved. Enjoy it while you can; in the next book no one will have ever heard of alligators.

Also, you will find this paragraph, worded almost exactly the same way, in at least two different parts of the book:

His face already held that darkness, that surety that most men's eyes get at some point when the clothes are coming off and the sex is happening. It's not exactly possessive, but yet it is, but it is predatory .... It wasn't a shapeshifter look, or a vampire look, it was a male look. Maybe women had their own version, but I rarely saw my own face in a mirror during sex, and I had only one other woman to compare to, and she didn't have a look like this one.

Also, lest we forget..."Gods," he said, "I'd forgotten how tight you stay even wet." I don't think we've fully explored the question of whether Anita's vampire marks come with a side-effect of Iron Snatch. There can be no other explanation. On the subject of the vampire marks, though, we do get this:

We'd finally figured out it was Jean-Claude's vampire marks that kept me from being able to shapeshift for real. Modern lycanthropy wasn't contagious to vampires, and I was just too close to being a vampire thanks to his marks, and my own necromancy. Ancient-strain lycanthropy had been contagious to the undead.

What the...one of the longest-standing, enduring, unexplained things in the Anita-verse, and that's ALL the explanation we get for it? Three sentences? Nothing about how we learned this, or from whom? Maybe I missed something in one of the past books, but really, it seems unlike Hamilton not to drive a point like that home with repeated paragraphs for several books in a row. It seems more like she got tired of trying to think of an explanation for why Anita was like this, and decided just to throw this paragraph out there to get rid of it. She needs the space to cut-and-paste more identical sex scenes and comments about how tight and wet Anita is AT ALL TIMES, dammit!

In further news of writerly laziness, it is determined that maybe Asher should go be the master of a new city, because he is a big pissy baby and everyone is sick of him. What new city, you ask? A new city. One that is new. Asher and his New City are mentioned forty-eleven time, and the place is never named, although it is clear they are referring to a specific place and not just "somewhere else." For the love of...just THROW A DART AT A MAP if it is so hard to decide where to put him! Topeka! Ypsilanti! Boca Raton! Just pick one! It doesn't matter, except in the way that it draws the reader's attention to the fact that you can't be bothered to put any effort into your writing anymore!

Finally, just for the pure WTF-ery of it, I present the following statement:

It just giggled me, and I was starting to own the things that made me happy, not because it made sense, or was horribly important, but it was just a happy.

I have no idea what that means. It looks like a sentence that was run through Google Translate a few times, from English to Thai to Flemish to Portuguese to Farsi and back to English again. Ladies and gentlemen, the word-stylings of Laurell K. Hamilton, alleged native English speaker.

Now I need to go lie down with a cool compress on my brow so that I can forget about all of this nonsense until the next book comes out.

[Shannon]

The one and only time I will ever put a gif in a review.

Edited on 5/7/12, because I apparently have more to say ...

Hit List was the end of Anita Blake for me, after reading this series for the better part of a decade, so check out my review of it to see why I'm not reading Kiss the Dead. I grew attached to the characters and the story and was thoroughly invested with these books until it just got to the point that I couldn't read them without wanting to stab myself in the eye or tear my hair out, or both. It wasn't the sex (which, even though it got ridiculous it was at least hilarious enough to be entertaining), it wasn't the plot (what little existed), it wasn't JUST the writing (though it continued to go downhill with each subsequent book), it was a combination of all of those things and more.

She's run this series into the ground and continues to milk it even though it's painfully obvious she doesn't know what she's doing with it anymore. I don't even recognize most of the characters (especially since some of the leads haven't even been IN the books for the last few) and Anita is just an awful Mary Sue who runs around in circles asking the same questions and getting into the same disagreements and adding more and more men and more and more powers to both her and others through her magical vagina. Every book ends with a couple of pages to wrap things up in an epilogue instead of using the bulk of the book for those plot points. If someone reads this book and sees my review and can prove me wrong and this one is different, I'd love to know, but any trollish comments will be deleted.

I went looking for new info about the Meredith Gentry series (yes, I still will read that one and I actually even enjoy it a little bit), and happened upon an excerpt from an outtake that was "too hot to handle" (seriously, how is that possible? Once you write tentacle and human/"childlike" goblin sex and double penetration, I ... don't want to know what "too hot to handle" could possibly mean), from Kiss the Dead. Really, how anyone can read this and not understand why she needs to get a new editor (saw on her blog she actually DOES have one, though how much she lets her editor actually EDIT is suspect), and stop writing this series until she knows what the fuck she wants to do with it is beyond me.

I finally let myself look at that face, and I felt like I had from almost the first moment I’d seen him, that he was simply one of the most beautiful men I’d ever seen. The black curls touched the edge of his face, as if bringing attention to the curve of his mouth, the line of his cheek, and those eyes. They always looked blue, but they were so dark. Midnight blue with their double edge of black eyelashes like dark lace to frame the deepest blue I’d ever seen in anyone’s eyes. His eyes were a blue like deep ocean water, where it runs cold and will eventually spill down into something warm and mysterious, where creatures the light has never seen live and thrive. Those gorgeous eyes looked at me, and there was love in them, but the second he saw me in the doorway, walking toward him, there was lust, desire, and just a heat that brought a blush to my face and an answering heat to my own eyes. Six years after we’d first started dating I was still a little amazed that this most lovely of men wanted me so badly. They talked about burning for each other, and we still did. I never seemed to get over the surprise of turning around and seeing him there. You’d think I’d get used to seeing such a beautiful man and knowing he was mine, but it never grew old, as if his beauty and the fact that he was mine, and I was his, would forever surprise me.

Hmm. I think she's trying to describe a MAN with BLUE EYES who is HERS in this scene. I'm not always great at critiquing literature, but I think that's what she was going for. Maybe.

Seriously, did you see she wrote "he was mine" twice in the same sentence? Well, good to know that this scene was cut from the book because it didn't fit in with whatever "plot" she came up with and not because it's so awful it shouldn't be published ... oh, wait, it IS being published. Instead of making this a free story on her site for whatever fans she has left, she's selling it as an ebook for $2.99. Shameful, but it doesn't surprise me at all. The only thing that still surprises me is that she has any fans left.

[MischaS_ · Rating 1 out of 5]

You know what? I am so sick of this.

It starts rather promising. We even got a new pretty interesting character. A new Marshal who is not blinded as all the other cops and focuses on the important stuff and not on who's sleeping with whom.

But then what? Anita goes back to her "sweeties" (hate that word!), and it's all sex, insecurities and talking. And pointless, endless descriptions!

I bet that Hamilton has a file with a lengthy description of every character. And every time they come to the scene, she just puts the description there. Every single time! We all know how blue eyes J-C has. We all know what happened to Asher and how he got his scars. And how he hides behind his hair. We all KNOW that! Or Nathaniel's hair. I seriously want to shave them off (and donate them) just not to have to read about his hair all the time!

Yet, she always repeats herself.

And speaking about J-C... Master of the city? No way! No one, not only Anita but also some lousy wererats he is paying do not follow his orders!

And the Anita almost kills Nicky and when they are supposed to really explain it something interrupts them. But Anita had time to cuddle with Jade.

This is beyond pathetic. Especially because it ended like every other book. When Anita summarised what happened with the bad guys and how they rock. And how hard it is going to be with her "sweeties" but how much she loves them.

[Nathan · Rating 1 out of 5]

I honestly don't know why I continue to read this series, it's a complete "guilty pleasure" (no pun intended) but always ends up being a disappointment.

The first few chapters of the book were promising, Anita back in the action doing some police work. This is pretty much the highlight of the book, there isnt much conflict elsewhere.

I realized I was about 50%+ through the book and all that happened was Anita was at a crime scene, she came home and had sex.

Also by book #21 I dont need to read the description of characters height, hair color, eye color, body shape over and over and over again.

The series is no longer worth the read and it's not even a "guilty pleasure" any more because there is no pleasure reading these books.

I have no clue how people are rating this over 3 stars, if you want to read erotica, read real erotica, if you want horror, read real horror...this series is dead in the water and I hope Anita and her harem of men all get shot in the head with a silver bullet the end it.

We need to start sending a message to authors and STOP BUYING TERRIBLE BOOKS. Fine you want to write crap, well we're done buying it so you can live a comfy life without putting in the effort to actually create a solid story.

[Sarah · Rating 2 out of 5]

I keep hoping this series will go back to its roots and get better again ;)

[Malleck · Rating 3 out of 5]

I love this series but frankly, please no more sex sex sex, in the last few books I fell like I am reading porn, it's not that the book is bad but in book 15 - 19 I lost a great part of the story simply because i got tired of reading about sex and started skipping pages with it, it seems Anita isn't doing anything besides her many boyfriends.

I loved the virginlike Anita of the firs books, not particularly because she was virginlike but because she actualy did things like policework or have friends, now she is either having sex, thinking about sex or killing people.

The last book was interesting, hit list drops the constant sex of the other books and does some actual police work (the craziness of using a rocket launcher in a car is very Edward-like) I would like to ask for a less self doubting Anita like in the first books but thats just not gonna hapen is it? Please return to the less predicable Anita of her early vampire-hunting days

Unfortunately Hit list still manages to introduce a new guy in Anita's life, please stop doing that, enought lovers already do something diferen kill one of them for a change or make one of them screw up so bad that she drops him, I find it almost impossible to believe that among all the people she has only Richard was a jackass it is simply not normal

As for Edward... I find the new humanized Edward kind of disturbing, he was beyond awesome in the early books but now I think of him as an actual person, a male Anita only with less lovers, thats just not cool with me.

I think that book 20 was a step towards a new Anita Blake, a start in the recreating of the old Anita, now if only they didn't need to keep asking Why, what, how about every damn thing in the book and she could stop whining about her sex life things could realy get better, I mean I get that she was a prude but after more or less 10 books of doing it like bunnies with her half a dozen lovers it would be reasonable that she either get over it or start to do something about the damn ardeur, I mean she can now feed on more than just sex she can try living another way if she realy has as much trouble with it as she pretends to

So... here am I waiting for june... the sumary is promissing and after 20 books it's not like I am gonna give up on the series but i am realy not hoping for a great improvement in it.

If the book can save the old Anita i will have a great and wonderfull surprise, if it can't, well with the way things are going I have had bigger deceptons

[Claudia · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have waited a long time for this new installment in Anita Blake series. It pains me to say this but it kind of disappointed me a little. After having finished reading the book I felt something was missing, it was good but it was only a few steps from being great. Perhaps what was missing was more plot development, I thought that the whole book was going to be centered on the missing 15 year old girl and on the vampire master, Benjamin, as it was mentioned it the synopsis. All though I must admit that the ending almost gave me a heart attack.

Most readers complain that there is too much sex in the books and that Anita complains too much about her polyamorous lifestyle. I disagree on both of the opinions; we have to understand that as the series continues, this is a very complex lifestyle and that Anita and her relationships are developing are constantly changing. In this book, there are two major changes: Anita has finally come to terms with the relationship she has with Cynric aka Sin (although I personally hate the nickname, it doesn’t help), and Asher has been in a sense banished from Saint Louis because of his jealousy and his conscious or unconscious determination of making all those around him pay for his insecurities. He is constantly hurting others and then asking for forgiveness. I say it’s about time.

Despite being a little disappointed, I’m still looking forward to the next book in the series. However I think is time to put aside for a while the Anita Blake series, I’m looking forward to the next installment in the Meredith Gentry series.

[John · Rating 1 out of 5]

"When a fifteen year-old girl is abducted by vampires, it's up to U.S. Marshal Anita Blake to find her. And when she does, she's faced with something she's never seen before: a terrifyingly ordinary group of people-- kids, grandparents, soccer moms-- all recently turned and willing to die to avoid serving a master. And where there's one martyr, there will be more...

But even vampires have monsters that they're afraid of. And Anita is one of them..."

With the Mother of All Darkness gone, sucked down the drain like a swirly, Laurell Hamilton is now struggling to find a story arc for this series, something to pad out the pages of her fantasy life between the sexual olympics. Before anyone gets too excited about the outline, remember what series this is and who's writing it. And re-read that blurb; it takes just about that long to resolve this scenario- the first 7 out of the 50 chapters. And once it's done, you already know what comes next. This book can be broken down into three categories- Plot, Sex, Wangst. Believe it or not, Plot wins. A basic page count breakdown goes like this: Plot- 46%, (Actual) Sex- 13%, Wangst- 41%. But as the majority of the wangst relates to sex, you could well say that it makes for over half the book. Because of that the story can't help but crash and burn, but not exactly for the reasons you'd think, and it actually has a few redeeming features.

**Potential Spoiler Alerts**
The Good: It's Old Home Week as several long time friends finally make their return. Dolph, Zerbrowski, Larry Kirkland; yes, Virginia- RPIT's back! And there's actually flashes of a story and some interesting plotlines dropped in here like bread crumbs. Alas- Hamilton herself is both the bird who's scooping them up and the child lost in the woods as a result. She drops these nuggets in for the sole purpose of filling pages and never takes the time and effort to develop the myriad and possibly intriguing threads she could weave into the series. All save one: someone very important is on the verge of a career change. But why not follow these other threads and see what manner of tapestry they may form? Why, you ask...?

The Bad: Because then the book couldn't be dominated by- you guessed it- SEX!!! While the amount of time spent on getting busy is by comparison, greatly diminished, it continues to dominate the story. Everything not directly related to the main plotline about the unbound vampires is focused upon having sex, talking about sex, who's (not) having sex with whom, who should (not) be having sex with whom...

Hamilton has always berated detractors of the ridiculous sexual politics in the series with a tired, trite analogy that it would be alright if a man did it. Well, let me ask you: if a 30-year old man not only had a bevy of beauties whom he kept leashed to him via his mighty 'Staff of Power' but deflowered a 16-year old girl, becomes her legal guardian and continues to have sex with her even though she's still a minor in HS, often after PTA meetings... would that be alright with you because it was a man doing it? So how do you justify Anita's relationship with Cynric? Hamilton bends over backwards trying to and fails miserably by giving readers chapter after grimy chapter of Anita struggling with the idea of it all only to have Cynric decide the issue by telling her not to attend the PTA meetings. Oh, ok then- that makes everything all better: having the adult defer to the wisdom of their jailbait lover. Now imagine that between a grown man and a cheerleader- still good for you? And this is the conflict that fuels most of the wangsting Anita does.

There's also some drama with Asher that leads to an interesting development and a pathetically comic one. Asher starts a fight, slightly injuring Anita in the process and the only concern about Anita's health afterwards is that she won't be able to give anyone oral sex for a while. Even worse is a sex scene between Mephistopheles and Anita the aftermath of which is just plain nasty, and not in a good way. I can only imagine that this was included as a middle-finger to give all you vanilla-sex-missionary-position-prudey-prudes to hate on, because it was beyond tasteless. Which brings us to...

Teh Stoopid: Where do I begin? How about at the beginning: first off, turns out the preview chapter offered up in the Beauty ebook wasn't even a full chapter; only about 2/3rd of it (Nice way to promote a novel by ripping off your fans before it comes out). Cops aren't allowed to have holy items in the room when interrogating vamps because of some dopey law (mainly because Hamilton couldn't come up with anything better than this stupidity), then Anita goes to a hostage scene in hoochie wear, not only not bothering to change into protective gear along the way but only doing so AFTER the crisis is resolved... because of some dopey law (see previous statement). And for the record, can we ever be shown any of the events that lead up to these laws being made instead of them just being contrivances to prop up the lack of imagination in this series... I guess I answered my own question, huh?

Dolph's been to the same lobotomist Richard went to in Bullet; now he's just as cool with the whole 'Vampires are People, Too' groove as Richard now is with passing Anita around like a party favor. Dolph resolved his years of hostility in one retroactive paragraph. And Larry Kirkland- friend and protégé- suddenly turns into a Hater as well, but also gets replaced just as quickly. How's that for characters growing and developing?

Then we get one of the single worst passages you'll ever read. An angry cop tries to take a swing at some vampires that have been arrested. Anita intervenes and ends up feeding off his anger: "sipping it through the muscled bunch of his arm... swallowing the thick, red fire of his rage... smelled his blood beating just beneath the bitter sweetness of his anger, so that he was like a piece of cupcake with dark, bittersweet icing that could be licked away, to the warm, moist cake and then the hot, liquid center where the sweetest, thickest chocolate lay waiting like some hidden treasure that would make the anger even tastier." Thanks for ruining Tastycakes for me, Laurell.

Oh, and why don't these vampires want to bind themselves to Jean-Claude and, by proxy his doxy, Anita? What great, soul-crushing evil has JC perpetrated against these newbie vamps? Being a Master of the City, JC draws power from the lesser creatures to heal his people, so much so that... (wait for it)... they can't even grow their hair long, while he can grow his out.

Nope, not kidding. Not even a little.

Indeed, JC's been doing this precisely because Anita likes his hair long. It's as if the entire premise of this book is based upon none of these vampires ever having seen Troy Polamalu in a Head & Shoulders commercial. Or maybe they did and that's what set them off.

And where would we be without Anita complaining about being under suspicion for her relationships with paranormals? Well, in light of this new development of unsupervised vampires running loose in the city, what does Anita do? Why, she knowingly compromises the investigation by telling JC, of course; never mind that this is EXACTLY the kind of thing everyone's concerned about with her- the sweeties may be in trouble, and that's all that matters! Later in the book when a couple of investigators come and talk to her, she conveniently forgets she's done this and twists the conversation into being all about her zexxy life, which makes them jealous whiner babies. If they weren't such Keystone Kops and let her get away with it, this coulda been something. And speaking of her paranormal relationships, Hamilton also trots out the Hater Brigade; you know, all them skanks what can't get their own menz so keep pushing up on Anita's guyz. You'd think even Hamilton would get tired of this crud by now, but hey- they're her fantasies.

Get this: once RPIT locates the nests of the rogue vampires it's agreed to go in at dawn after they're asleep to take them out. Easy and simple enough, right? But there's a crisis for Anita to resolve, after which she goes home to get it on with Nate and Micah, and doesn't get the call to go out until when? Two hours before sunset!- and no, no one else has staked a single vampire anywhere yet. So what happened to getting to the vampires at dawn, or right after lunch? Stop asking, because it ain't explained.

Before I forget, the master vampire mentioned in the first chapter, Benjamin? He operates via his human servant, Weiskopf, and damn if this ain't one of the most god-awful, dip-stickiest, incompetent and wimpiest Master/Servant combos you'll ever see. Because that's what it takes in Anita-land- villains dumber than vampire hunters too stupid to kill vampires at high noon.

Enough already. Hamilton's lost her fershluggin' mind. If there was any doubt that this series is now only about sex, this book will remove it. It'll also remove your desire to continue reading it any more.

[Penny Well Reads · Rating 2 out of 5]

I am so disappointed.

I used to love this series so much, now everything feels like a mess with all the lovers, and repetitive with the action plots.
It has taken me two very separate tries to actually finish reading this book. The first try was back in 2015 when I ended up pausing it out of utter boredom and disinterest. Now, in 2018 I restarted the book one more time and almost gave up on it once again.

The first half of this book has no story. It's just Anita being an enforcer and doing the same stuff we have seen her doing many times before. It is Anita having the same internal monologs and opinions we have heard before. It is Anita having the same conversations with her colleagues and vampire detainees that we have witness before. There is nothing juicy or remotely interesting, there is nothing about her relationship with her boyfriends, there is no sex. There is nothing at all. What a joke.
Because of this first half I put down the book and classified it as DNF, furthermore, I almost gave up on the whole series. In the end, once my anger diminished, I changed my mind and went back to finish it.

The second half improved for me because we finally enter into relationships territory. Personally, I am way more interested in that. However, it felt repetitive and it does seem like it is getting out of hand. It is loosing the intensity it used to have and all originality is gone.

Despite my disappointment, I will keep reading this series in hopes that it will improve.

[Galena · Rating 1 out of 5]

UGH. I spoke too soon when in my last review for this series I said it seemed like LKH would get past the "let's add in a sex scene, just because we can! We'll just say it's to feed her "ardeur" but really it's because I want to write as much kinky stuff (reader's note: *YAAAAAAAAAAAAWN*) as possible even if there's NO REASON FOR IT in the story!" I'm pretty sure this entire 400-ish page book took place over 2 days. BE LESS VERBOSE, FOR GOD'S SAKE. Cut out all the "I'm not pretty" Anita whinging, and all the "you don't love ME enough" whinging from her fuckbuddies, and kill Asher off entirely. Honestly, I can't even keep track of this ridiculous cast of characters anymore. She's sleeping with what, 25 people now? And I don't care about more than 5 of them. And it seems LKH only brings them in to cycle through them in sex scenes. Blech. I think this book finally broke me. I'm done with Anita. Hopefully LKH doesn't destroy Merry Gentry too. Seriously, where are her editors in all this? Someone needs to rein her in since she obviously can't express control by herself. These books have turned into her outwardly-expressed masturbatory fantasies and little else.

[Magda · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 stars

It's sad to say that the sex was the best part of this book.
I hate that the Anita books have become vampire fashion books. I REALLY don't care about people's hair/length/color/silkiness/curls/shine as much as LKH. The degree to which she describes peoples physical appearance & clothing is RIDICULOUS. I seriously skimmed half this book.
Plus, we KNOW Anita is not tall, thanks for the 5,987 reminders LKH.

I think it's safe to say that anyone reading this book is a fan of the series. The detailed description of EVERY SINGLE WEAPON is not necessary, especially when, ultimately, Anita doesn't even use the damn things.

Also, when is Anita going to HUNT Otto? I really hoped this book would be it vs. this filler crap.

Finally, the Anita guilt trip is getting old. The day she owns up to any of her shit will be the day I give another Anita book 5 stars.
The constant reminder of her badass-ness only to be shown that she's really not badass at all is tiring. Anita has more emotional swings than a teenager invited to homecoming by their crush.

Maybe it's time to let the series die ..... it's becoming painful to read.

[Justyn Kyle · Rating 4 out of 5]

Can't wait!!! Absolutely LUV Anita Blake series!

[Alisa Kester · Rating 1 out of 5]

For a long time now, I've just barely been hanging onto this series. I loved the first books, but wow, has this series changed for the worst. And this one...I have no words for how horrible it is. If someone *tried* to purposely write a bad book I don't think they could make it worse than this one.

The writing is SO terrible. Horrible, horrible editing - over and over again Anita will explain something, only to have a second character say the exact same explanation three paragraphs later. The descriptions are so over-wrought, and yet...so boring. How many paragraphs does she have to devote to explaining that a man's hair is dirty blonde? Or that he has blue eyes? Hamilton can easily take half a page or more. And there are a lot of hair and eye descriptions!

And the content is all the most annoying parts of all the previous bad books condensed into this one. Every couple of pages, we are treated to a few paragraphs about how Anita is such a teeny tiny little woman, and yet she's so much more than an equal to the big huge men...and those big huge men all respect her SO MUCH...except for the ones that are freaked out by her and her sexploits. And the other women are so, so jealous...and Anita is like a Guy, who knows how to speak Guy, and she despises women because they are not Guy-Women like her... I'm friggin' SICK of Anita's issues with women!

And then there's the opening scene. Anita is going out on an official police job, to save a kidnapped girl - a girl who is at serious and immediate risk of death. What does she wear? Stilettos, a short skirt, thigh-high stockings with garters, and a thong. We know about the thong, because of course she flashes all the big huge men while fighting off a vampire attack. Which she wins, because she is so much tougher than those big huge men, even though she's just this teeny tiny woman! And she's embarrassed, because she's wearing red nail polish (left over from last night's big date) and wearing red nail polish is just so unprofessional! Then she has to chase the bad guy while on the balls of her feet (because she's wearing stilettos and can't put her heels down.) Then, she has to climb stairs, only she can't manage in her stilettos, so she takes them off, but then - whoopsie! - she slips in her darn slippery thigh-highs, so she sits down and unhooks them from their garters and peels them off (while the very patient big huge men gather around her and wait for her to finish, and the kidnapped girl waits to maybe die) and then Anita continues to climb the steps in her bare feet. Oooh! Ick! She has to wade through squishy blood because she's too polite to walk over the dead body instead...even though she wishes she could. Because she might be a MONSTER who is unable to feel proper human things! She only changes into her actual police work clothes after all is over and done...because there's a silly little law that says she has to perform at least part of her duties while dressed properly.

By the time I was halfway through I was suffering too much to finish it. I skimmed the rest, and came to a resolution: I will never, never, ever bother reading another of the Anita books. Finally, I have reached my breaking point. I think Hamilton has gone insane...I certainly know Anita has. Wow. What a tremendously terrible book.

[Megan Dolle-blaisdell · Rating 1 out of 5]

Ok... I have read this series 3 times. This book I could barely tolerate. They've been going steadily downhill, but I think we finally crashed.

First, we get that Anita is a tiny little he woman badass. Swat trusts her, her men trust her, the community trusts her, the vamps fear her. She's a dwarf with an attitude. For 21 books, LKH beats it in our head that tiny little Anita does the work of a whole squadron while managing to screw 20 men and now 1 woman.

Second, ANITA IS NOT A MAN! She does not speak guy. LOL I actually laughed out loud when she asks why 3-4 times and then the next paragraph it's all about how she speaks guy and could finish the conversation with a nod. No, only toddlers say why 6 times then get bored, nod, and walk away...

Thirdly, who interrupts sex to think to hard about not loving someone!? In the middle of screwing Nicky she starts thinking about not loving him like her other men. Gross. Get over it and STFU! Don't screw all of these poor bastards then. Let them have a life away from you!

And last but not least... If I read one more page about how blue everything is- jc's eyes, Asher's eyes, sin's eyes, the pajamas, the robe, Jason and his eyes. Or how long and curly everyone's hair is, or how blonde Nicky, devil, envy, pride's hair is, or Nathaniel's hair that is dragging on the floor? I will claw out my own eyeballs.

LKH is seeming bored with Anita because every book is the same as the next. This one had zero plot, tons of angst and why's and drama with lovers, and it was totally over done
. She is really getting bad about repeating herself. I think in this book se talked about Nicky losing his eye twice at different settings and Cynric not liking his name 50 times.

I'm done ranting. But this was a trainwreck.

[mlady_rebecca · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read an ARC of "Kiss the Dead" in order to review it for the book blog Fiction Vixen. Here's my review. I've been told it should be up on the website on Monday, June 4th.

(Note: I initially read the book on April 22. This review was finished by May 7th, just after I finished my first re-read.)

*****

"Some books are to be tasted, others to be swallowed, and some few to be chewed and digested: that is, some books are to be read only in parts, others to be read, but not curiously, and some few to be read wholly, and with diligence and attention."

-- Sir Francis Bacon
English author, courtier, and philosopher (1561 - 1626)

I ran across this quote the other day. For me Laurell K. Hamilton's "Anita Blake" series is one to be chewed and digested. That and the fact that we're twenty-one books in makes it hard to write an impartial spoiler free review, but I've tried my best.

Love,
Rebecca

*****

"Kiss the Dead" is the 21st book in the "Anita Blake" series by Laurell K. Hamilton. In a genre where most series find a natural ending around 12 books, if not earlier, 21 is quite a feat. For those unfamiliar with the series, know that this is one of those series where you definitely want to read the books in the order they were published. The first book is "Guilty Pleasures".

Around the time "Incubus Dreams" (book 12) came out, I noticed that the overall story shifted direction about every three books. If you treat the novellas ("Micah" and "Flirt") as "extras", we're now entering the 7th "trilogy" in the series. (See the reading order below.)

1. Guilty Pleasures
2. Laughing Corpse
3. Circus of the Damned

4. Lunatic Cafe
5. Bloody Bones
6. Killing Dance

7. Burnt Offerings
8. Blue Moon
9. Obsidian Butterfly

10. Narcissus in Chains
11. Cerulean Sins
12. Incubus Dreams

13. Micah (a novella)
14. Danse Macabre
15. The Harlequin
16. Blood Noir

17. Skin Trade
18. Flirt (a novella)
19. Bullet
20. Hit List

21. Kiss the Dead

(By the way, if you're not up to date with the series, stop reading now. *g*)

As "Kiss the Dead" opens, Anita is back in the middle of a case with RPIT and the local SWAT team. It feels to me like it's been quite a few books since we've had a meaty case at home in St. Louis. I want to say since they went after Vittorio and crew in "Incubus Dreams". Of the eight books between "Incubus Dreams" and "Kiss the Dead", four were out of town, and I believe the other four were all vampire/furry politics. So it really has been some time since we've seen Anita playing Federal Marshall on her own turf.

The first half of the book is all vampire hunting with RPIT. Zerbrowski and Anita are now basically working as partners. Dolph is back and has worked out most of his issues with Anita. We also meet the newest vampire executioner, U.S. Marshal Arlen Brice. I really like Brice. If he stays around long term, I think he'll be a nice addition to the overall cast. (FYI: Brice is the only new character that shows any signs of sticking around.)

Plot wise, RPIT is looking for a group of vampires who kidnapped a child and are planning to turn her. The vampires they find are a hodgepodge of young vampires (under 50 years dead), most of whom were turned when they were physically too young or too old. The other thing that stands out about the vampires is that they're not tied to a master, and they're not in any way connected to the Church of Eternal Life.

On the more personal side of things, it's been a year since the tigers came to St. Louis in "Bullet". Crispen, Domino, Jade, and the gold tigers (Envy, Devil, Pride, and Wrath) are all still living in the Circus. Cynric has moved back home with Anita, Nathaniel, and Micah.

Cynric and Nathaniel have bonded like brothers and, aside from his innocence, Cynric is starting to hit Anita's radar the way Nathaniel once did. (My impression, not something spelled out in the text.) If I had to guess, I'd say Cynric will stay around, if only for Nathaniel's sake.

For those who like statistics, the only "main" characters which were not on stage were the werewolves. While Richard doesn't usually hang around the Circus, it felt odd not to even see Jason in passing. (I adore Jason.)

As to sexual content, there were three sex scenes in the book. Of the three, one disturbed me a bit. Not the physical sex, but the emotional connection. I thought this was one of the men only there to feed the ardeur, someone Anita tolerated, but didn't particularly like. Well, suddenly he's being mentioned among the list of men Anita loves. I feel like I missed something. Of all the newer men, this is the last person I would have thought Anita would have bonded with.

My biggest wish list for future books is to see some of the recently added werecats sent on their way, including the man I was just discussing. I enjoy Anita's unconventional love life, but there are just too many men hovering in the wings. I just hope the one man who showed signs of leaving isn't one who stays gone.

Overall, I enjoyed the book. The writing style of this series is among the most immersive I've come across. I always enjoy getting lost in an Anita Blake book. I was particularly happy that we were back in St. Louis. Unless at least one of the major cast members comes along, I never really enjoy the out-of-town books as much. It was a pleasure to get some quality time with both Anita's RPIT family and her vampire/lycanthrope family.

My favorite quote:

(Part of a conversation between Anita and Jean-Claude.)

"Americans, living and undead, are an odd lot. They value their ideal of freedom beyond anything the rest of us would dream of."

"We're a young country," I said.

"Yes, in another day and age, America would be in their expansive, empire-building stage, but you came of age too late. The world leaders, and military, would never allow such conquest now."

"It would be nice to start keeping some of the land and resources that our soldiers are dying for," I said.

"Ma petite, are you a secret imperialist?"

"Just tired of watching our guys and girls die on the news, and have nothing to show for it except body bags."

"You have the freedom and gratitude of the people you are helping," he said, voice very mild.

I laughed. "Yeah, they're so grateful they keep trying to blow us up."

"It is an odd moment in history that America comes of age, that I will agree." (pg 61)

Rating: B (or 4 stars out of 5)
Kiss the Dead by Laurell K. Hamilton
June 5, 2012 by Berkley Hardcover
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*****

06/04/2012

Got a copy of the actual published book. The cover is prettier than some of the recent covers. I like the text in the background, and I like the blue that dominates the color scheme.

Unfortunately, the single page error I passed onto Laurell (on April 22nd) wasn't corrected. On page 158 (of the hardcover) Vivian is referred to as Vanessa twice.

*****

12/30/2019

Not sure why I picked that quote. My fondness for it didn’t stick.

And I teased this in the review to avoid spoilers (and be nice since I was being asked to do a more formal review), but time has past and I want it spelled out. ...

I hate Nicky. And I don’t believe Anita is foolish enough to fall in love with him. He’s like Olaf on a leash. It’s bad enough to have him around as a guard, but tacking him on the “guys I love” list and forgoing condoms, just ewww. She almost killed him with sex. Too bad that didn’t last. Honestly, I preferred Cookie and he threatened Nathaniel’s life. Anita has sucky luck with lions.

[Liv · Rating 1 out of 5]

Reading this book was akin to watching a train wreck. I could see it coming but I couldn't stop it.

After the last book, Hit List, I thought LKH redeemed the series somewhat by allowing Anita to do some "real" detective work, instead of engaging herself in countless, non-sensical sex with her lovers. When I found out that there was to be a new Anita Blake novel, I was very skeptical. I thought the series could have ended with Hit List. The "Mother of Darkness", or Marmee Noir, was already killed off in the last instalment. So leaving things as they were would have been good enough for me.

But no, Ms. LKH decided to milk this series some more.

Kiss of the Dead had a minimal plot (if existent at all) and had practically no substance to the overall story. Anita was asked to help with the rescue of a teenage girl who was abducted by a group of vampires. She worked with the special police unit called RPIT (its full name escapes me) to hunt and interrogate the vampires apprehended. And then story got stuck with Anita trying to solve the drama occurring in her personal life, and it didn't proceed any further until the end, when the bad vampires were caught and once again Anita saved the day.

That was it folks. I kid you not. Everything in between the summary above was pure waste of space.

The story was told from Anita's point of view, as usual. The majority of the book was filled with Anita's monologues in her head. All she ever thought about was her men (how hot they were), how she would have been happier if she could lose some lovers (since there wasn't enough of her to go around), and the fact that she had become one of the "monsters", blah blah blah. Real police/detective work and actions were largely missing, except in the beginning and at the end. In between, the book was all about Anita seeing her men and having sex - lots of it.

Yup, there you have it. Anita and sex with her men portrayed in the usual way. There was a lot of screaming and writhing - to this day I wondered if LKH could get a little more creative than "writhe" - there's got to be other words - to describe Anita's gigantic orgasms. Seriously, repeatedly reading descriptions of how wet and tight she was, and how she loved to scream and writhe when she spilled over the edge, was getting really old and boring. Though honestly speaking, it could be viewed as comical and entertaining, because it was the same old thing, over and over again.

There was absolutely no advancement of the entire series after this book. Anita didn't really improve or resolve anything, really. There was hardly any character development, other than that we saw some growth in Cynric (a.k.a. Sin), the youngest lover that Anita ever collected. She did not resolve any of the emotional conflicts she had with her lovers - the drama continued and was not much different than how it was 2 or 3 books ago. The central conflict in this story was laughable at best. And let me reiterate again, she had lots of sex - boring, but somewhat comical, sex.

That pretty much summed up my review and impression of this book. It lacked purpose, plot, and substance.

One might ask, if I hated it that much, why I even bothered reading the book?

Well, I have already invested so much time and efforts in this series. I kept naively hoping that things would get better, and I thought the last instalment was passable. Nonetheless, I was once again sorely disappointed with this one, yet again.

I apologize if I have offended anyone who may be a huge fan of the series or LKH's works. However, I have had enough of it and I think this book did it for me - I will not be reading any more of her books ever again. My time and energy is better spent elsewhere.

[Stephanie · Rating 1 out of 5]

I really tried to like this book. I tried to actually finish this book. I just can't. I don't even recognize Anita anymore. I actually hate her at this point. I got to chapter 6 only because I skipped several pages at a time. I couldn't read another paragraph about her explaining how amazing she is. She is the best, strongest, most respected cop. She is the know all of the monster community and everyone looks up to her. Every man loves her, even if she doesn't quite love all of them. Blah, Blah, Blah.......I really don't understand why LKH continues to write these books. It's obviously for the $$$ and not her fans. I can say that I will not finish Kiss The Dead and I will never read another Anita Blake novel. It's sad to say it. I loved this series at one point. I waited for each book to come out and now....I just can't waste my time on them. There are too many amazing authors out there. Hopefully LKH will put Anita out of her misery soon. It's insulting to her fans and obvious that she is only interested in taking their hard earned $$$$$.

[Robin · Rating 3 out of 5]

I am a long time Laurell K. Hamilton fan so I feel bad giving a not so great review. This book was better than the few that came before it, but LKH seems to have lost something the past few years. Her writing is repetitious. How many times do we need to be reminded that Anita is small? How many times do we need in depth descriptions of characters we have known for a long time? And how many times do we have to read the same phrases over and over? There was no meat to this book, and there hasn't been any meat in the last several books. At least there was more to this than just sex...but not much. Plus LKH seems to feel that she has to explain things to her readers like we are idiots. I get it. You don't have to explain something to me over and over. I'm not sure I will read any more of LKH's books, which makes me sad because they used to be so good. The last few I've read have been read with the hope that she will write like she used to...but so far it hasn't happened.

[Jennifer · Rating 2 out of 5]

This series has become a train wreck that I can't stop looking at. This installment falls into the same pitfalls as the last few

1) The main character spends most of her time accusing any male who isn't devoted to her as being sexist/racist/homophobic or in general ignorant asses.

2) At the same time she is doing this there is a tedious internal monologue of how she can't seem to accept her own choices.

3) The plot is buried under pages and pages of what everyone is wearing, how tall they are, how they cut their hair, random facts about their hobbies that bear no relevance to the surrounding context or the book as a whole.

4) Randomly thrown in graphic sex scenes that are not very inventive or erotic and just hinting at the more 'kinky' stuff.

5) Repetition of the same phrases over and over and over, sometimes even on the same page.

6) Shallow character development. There are now so many characters that there is no time for any development between the drawn out sex scenes and repetitive comparisons of everyone's height/clothing/eye colour/hair cut/jeans ect.

7) The end of the plot is suddenly summed up in the last couple pages with no real explanations.

[Karey Owens · Rating 1 out of 5]

I know I'll read this book, but like others have said, I'm wondering if it will be one of LKH's awesome stories or another completion of letters to penthouse. I love so many of the characters, but if I have to hear how Anita likes to gives vamps BJs before they've fed one more time I may puke. It's only those wonderful moments of the old, ballsy, to hell with it all Anita that keeps me reading. That, and I'm caught up on Black Dagger Brotherhood, which at least combines sex with an actual plot. Fingers crossed on Kiss the Dead.

6/13: finished the book and am now done with Anita Blake. The beginning was good, then came a couple hundred pages of sex... Then the quick wrap up ending. It's sad, these books used to be really fun to read.

[Fangs for the Fantasy · Rating 1 out of 5]

On the plus side, this book managed to get past half way before the sex scenes started. Ok, once they started they were pretty much chained, sex after sex after sex, but we did manage to go a full half book without unnecessary, excessive sex scenes.

On the minus side we didn’t have much to fill in the gap. The overall plot is a group of vampires who think they can live without a master and they’re being ornery about it. But this plot is a pretty minor point. We start with one battle scene and clean up that lasts for 30% of the book – nothing is developed or even introduced there. It’s just 30% of fight followed by policey-type things and then later in the book the plot raises its head, waves, and then goes away after, oh, a paragraph until the finale when you remember that there WAS actual plot there – and that tops off the last 10%. Well, not even that.

The rest of the book? Angst, issue, angst. Asher’s angst over everything. Anita’s angst over Cynric being 18. And lots of other really pointless relationship angsts between side characters we barely know (what is frustrating is while we’ve been having new characters introduced left right and centre there are apparently new wereleopards in town – Anita’s core animal group – and we don’t even look at it).

But the main content of this book? Filler. A lot of it down to the really drawn out righting – everything is ridiculously over describes, the same conversational points are repeated with different actors, Anita chases her own internal monologue down the same rather tiresome rails. In one moment of almost issue exploration Anita considers whether she is a monster and what that means – both supernaturally and morally. Then she has a conversation with Larry where he accuses her of being a monster. Then she has a conversation with Zerbrowski where she says she isn’t. Nothing’s developed beyond Anita’s first internal musings, we just go round the ride 3 times. And while I’m very happy that vampires aren’t considered the same as humans, which is a common problem with urban fantasy (especially when it comes to appropriation) at the same time, her “end justifies means” was very broad.

But the main reason I say filler is the huge amount of Chekhov’s junkshop we were treated to – in fact, some of them I’m going to paraphrase below because I can resist the sarcasm no longer:

Anita: Why hello there bit part police officer, you’re not going to play any role in this book?
Bit Part: nah, I’m just a walk on side character
Anita: Great! Let me describe in excruciating unnecessary detail!
Bit part 2: And me!
Anita: why yes, Let us waste 3 paragraphs unnecessarily describing you as well!
Bit Part 2: Sure, but I have some relationship issues, complete stranger Anita, want to discuss them in the middle of this crime scene?
Anita: Why yes, yes I do. Let us spend 2 pages discussing your relationship with your girlfriend because this is totally relevant to the story.

Anita: And now I will telepathically talk to Jean-Claude across the city
JC: hello, ma petite
Anita: Hush JC, you’re interrupting my unnecessarily detailed description of your clothes
JC: Oh… finished yet?
Anita: Not yet. Almost. Working on it. Now working on the eyes. There, done.
JC: Can I talk now?
Anita: So long as you keep it brief. This plot thing is getting in the way of my unnecessary descriptions.

Read More

[Anna · Rating 2 out of 5]

It started off so well, I was happy to be reading about Anita working again and the case was interesting and so damn hopeful that the series had found some direction and balance again. Then she went home and chapter after chapter after chapter of really dull sex and relationship drama began, totally downhill until the last few very short chapters that sum up the case.

Another terrible thing about this book was the editing, really there didn't seem to be any. If the reader was told something once they were then told it again several times. Anita constantly reminds the reader that she's small, I understood the first time that Sin has blue hair did I really need to be told another 2 or 3 times and the third time she reminded us that she knew not to openly notice the guards around the house just made me yell at the book... Anita spends a lot of time comparing people to different types of cake, also, she acted surprised when someone said 'ass deep in alligators' but it's a phrase that gets overused in these books and was then used a couple more times, some variety would be much more interesting to read. If you've read any of the more recent Anita Blake books you know what she enjoys in bed, but Ms Hamilton seems to feel the need to tell us all over again. What makes the sex scenes so dull is that there is nothing original in them any more and also the fact that they are so filled with explanations and asides about other people that you just lose interest in the whole thing and end up skim reading them.

I won't be buying the next one in hardback, whether I buy it at all remains to be seen which is sad after spending so much time with Anita. She says that there are enough men in her life, I think we've got about 5 too many (but thank god Richard didn't make an appearance, dullest male character ever written) and could have actually done with the ending going the other way to clear a few of them out so Anita can get back to being her badass self and thinking about something besides who she's going to sleep with next and whether everyone is getting along.

[Terri ♥ (aka Mrs. Christian Grey) · Rating 5 out of 5]

Quick review:

Cover: Love the color
Rating: NC-17
Steaminess Scorching
Thumbs Up: 4.5
Overall: Back to all things great in a Anita Blake book
Characters: Well done
Plot: It was what is expected, danger, sex, lies and videotapes (JK on the last)
Page Turner: Yes
Series Cont.? yes
Recommend: Yes
Book Boyfriend: Nicky (and Jean-Claude, Micah, Nathaniel, Dev, etc…..)

SUMMARY (50 words or less)

This wasn’t an Edward book so we got more good stuff in this one. We had a bit of a storyline with a case Anita’s working on. The case didn’t seem to be the whole focus of the book at least not in the second half, but it was there.

To see my full review and yummy pic, check out my blog post below.

COMING SOON

AUDIO REVIEW

Kimberly Alexis is amazing. She does a superb job in this series and I can’t imagine anyone else reading this. They tried that and it failed. She made listening to this story so enjoyable to listen to. My only tiny complaint was that she changed Micah’s voice. I haven’t listened in a while but his having an Irish sounding accent was a little weird considering he’s a hometown boy. But he still didn’t sound like any of the others so it wasn’t that bad.

[Lukas Anthony · Rating 3 out of 5]

Anita gets hit in the face, and everyone is sad that she can't perform oral sex for a while. The End.

[BookAddict ✒ La Crimson Femme · Rating 3 out of 5]

Anita is back again and the first police scene, she's wearing some kind of smexy unprofessional nail polish, a short skirt and Mary-Jane style stiletto heels. Yes, Nathaniel dressed her again and she's looking like stripper rather than a US Marshall. Guess this is what happens when a 23 year old male stripper picks out her clothes. One would think she would learn by now. In case people were confused about what Mary-Jane style stiletto heels look like.

Within the first 83 pages

1. Anita's already been called a monster
2. She's shorter than every person
3. Her fuck buddies boyfriends have been mentioned
4. Another old friend has turned on her an called her a pet monster
5. She loses another friend

This book based on "vampire slayer" plot was heading to a one star rating.

1. New set of vampires with the same formula as the Church of Eternal Life avoiding the blood oath

2. New villain is old and more powerful than Jean-Claude in the way that he can't be detected. Yet the villain never once appears in the book. He's only mentioned and then moves on his way. W.T.F?

3. I don't go to a therapist and I'm not a shrink. Why the hell would I want to read a 359 page book where the majority of it is spent on relationship therapy in some fucked up style? Seriously, when will the focus stop on fucked up relationships and each boy's drama? Is this some kind of trashy reality show?

4. Asher becomes a passive aggressive jealous abusive whiny bitch.

5. Where did Wicked and Truth go?

6. Again? Why do we have to go into the age issue again? She's fucking a 18 year old and she's 30. She doesn't like to be a cougar. I guess she's not into the Mommy Kink. She can't go to parent/teacher conferences and still screw Sin's (Cynric) brains out.

7. Vomiting of repeat world building. Kitty pile this time, how her strength is because of marks, her necro powers, her lovers emotional issue, blah blah blah blah blah. She over informs on information everyone who's reading the series already knows. Sloppy editing is what this is. This new editor, Missy, LKH thanks in the acknowledgements better step up her game. At this point in the series, there are no new readers, it's all the same ones who have been reading the series from the beginning. We don't need the repetition.

8. For a woman who keeps telling the readers how much like a guy she thinks, Anita sure doesn't demonstrate it. The stuff going on inside Anita's head is all female. Guys don't think like this. The guys in this book don't count because most of them all behave like hysterical high maintenance females that EVERYONE wants to avoid. All they are good for is a good fuck because of how they look. Personality wise, who the hell has time to keep up with their drama?

9. Brice is introduced and dives straight into questions for Anita and she just spills her relationship information? WTF. Not believable.

So, I tossed out the plot and any type of writing style rating and went instead with what I enjoyed. PORN GLORIOUS PORN! WOOT!

1. Anita is GAY FOR YOU! WOOT, she's now getting a little something from a hot little Chinese number - Black Jade. YES! (I'm Chinese so this is happy happy dance for me.) Yet, there isn't a freaking f/f sex scene, just a "mention" of it. BOO! (cock tease slut)

2. Come on, cougar time, seriously, fuck the 18 year old already. He wants it. He's legal and Anita want his sexy little ass. The teasing kiss is just that, teasing.

3. This book is more about the difficulties of a poly relationship. We learn all sorts of fun terminology. For those who are vanilla and monogamous, it's educational. For those of us who are kinky..."yawn".

4. The shower scene with Nicky. Woot. That was pretty hawt. Erotic asphyxiation through deep-throating is always a plus.

5. Micah, Nathaniel and Anita banging it at home.

6. Implied Dom behaviours from Asher to Anita's submissive ones. But they are never show so it's all just a cock tease again.

Actually, the sex in this book was kind of few and far between and not really that intense. So, this is really a 2 star for the porn part. The only reason why it gets a 3 star is because Anita is now fucking a Chinese female tiger. What can I say? I'm bias. Recommended for readers who want to read about poly relationships that work and ones that are a train wreck.

[Poppy Fields · Rating 2 out of 5]

I am a huge Anita Blake fan and have read the entire series. I never exxxpected such a drop in quality from LKH. I don't think this book was even edited.

I found the case Blake is assigned to underwhelming. The bulk of the book was her inner dialogue about her polymonogamous lifestyle and how to deal with her "sweeties". There are tedious descriptions of the color of her lover's eyes, how well she can perform fallatio, and how she is use to being the smallest person in the room.

My favorite vampire, Jean-Claude is a spineless wimp in this book and Asher behaves pathetically. I don't know if LKH has so many characters in her story now that she can't remember their personas she built up in previous books or if she just got lazy.

There are so many things to dislike about this book that I will stop complaining. Despite my whining I will read the next one too. I am a fan and hope this is book was just a fluke but I am not going to rush out to buy it the day it is released as I have in the past.

[Paris (kerbytejas) · Rating 1 out of 5]

Well I'm sure we all have our Anita book that we don't like - well I have just found mine......This was the hardest, longest read for me, repetitive, boring book. It would have been an ok short story, maybe 150 pages...plot was simple - group of vampires wants to not be bound to a master (freedom), wants to kill Anita & Jean-Claude, issues with Asher (jealous), typical Anita and her love interest issues, and then some cops & bad guy scenes.

what I can't figure out
1 )Is Ms Hamilton writing and hoping that her NY Times best selling author fame will carry her?
2) Why was this book so dragged out and why so many repeats of the same phrases, paragraphs etc?
3) Why so little development?
4) Why was the exciting, dramatic ending wrapped up so quickly and easily.
5) why so little about the new guy? - I really liked Arlen Brice, would have like more development, would have like him to get with one of Anita's many bodyguards, or single wereanimals in the books
6) Why did I feel the relationship with Micha (who i love) seemed strained, and not as secure & loving as in past books?
7) Why is Anita constantly questioning her ability to do her job and have her lifestyle - is this Ms Hamilton's way of hinting that Anita may be coming to an end

I have read every Anita book to date, I wanted to stop reading this one so many times but felt I owed it to the history of all the books to finish it(there were times when cleaning the cat box had more appeal).
I am surprised at the number of positive reviews I have seen out there for this book, are others just not being truthful, or am i just being harsh..? I may never know. But I do know I will think harder when the next book comes out, for the price paid for this book, it should have been way better, in fact for all the faithful Anita fans it should have been way better

[Kirstin Mcfarland · Rating 3 out of 5]

For as many complaints as there have been about where the series is going, I am BEYOND excited to see the next book, and where it's going. AH! I can't wait! I love the diversity of the characters, and i sincerely hope that there is a lot more Nathaniel in this one... I love him. :D

6/27/2012

I just finished the book. While I'm a LKH fan all the way, I think I'm slightly disappointed in this one. You can tell it's a filler book, of some sort. I think that's my only complaint, though. The character's are slightly different, but I think that's a good thing. Some of the characters are developing, while I didn't get to see some of my favorite characters, and that was beyond saddening to me.
But, on the other hand, She's setting up for something big (or at least issues that are going to arise soon), and showing us a different side to Anita. This, i think, is what I've been waiting for. Now that it's here, I fear the end may be approaching (not cool!).

[Bianca]

NOTE TO SELF: If you EVER read another of these shits I'm going to kick your ass.

70% through

I'm not finished but... my reaction to the whole Asher scene was "God please no. Please."
I think I'm going to have to create a shelf "NEVER PICK UP AGAIN, FOR GOD SAKE" just to remind me. I'm going to rant, now, mostly because I need it, so this is going to be even more senseless than my usual review.
Why does this damn woman have to do to it to me EVERY FREAKING TIME?? WHY?
Hit List wasn't the best, but it wasn't trash.
We are back in trashville, trashlane, trashsquare. WHY?
Because she got to the point she made that damn Mary Sue fuck so many man she doesn't even know what to do with them. So she started trowing them away by the handfuls.
Richard, RICHARD, RICHARD with all his issues, apparently fucked Asher.
JC e RICHARD (is it me, or after The Harlequin he's more of a sporadic sidekick? not that I'm complaining, since I hate his guts, but really? their third? BAH.) are currently fucking a weretiger named ENVY (envy? really? just saying.) and she's not happy because JC runs to the evil dwarf lady when she calls, because he loves Anita more.
Micha, Nat and the other one... Sin-something, the teen even I, in my full 21-year-old glory would feel a little bad fucking. The perfect picture of domestical bliss: you can't kick 'em out too, so you gotta keep 'em.
Now she's got the tigers, and the fucking tigers are fucking every damn thing in sight. Themselves included, hopefully.
Damian, let's talk Damian. No, wait, let's not, since the only way he is mentioned in the last few novels is to say that he's gone monogamous on their asses and has a steady girlfriend.
Most of the vampire lovers she accumulated (do I remember a London or the Wicked Truth, somewhere?) are not even mentioned anymore.
And last but never really least Asher: Asher is fucking JC, Anita, Mephistofeles (again, really?), Nataniel, Jason (that's 3 novel he does not even appear in, but for being mentioned in passing) and so many other people it's just confusing and he's jealous of them all to the point they have to send him away. Yeah, him, really? No, okay, let's talk about it, because I really loved this character, he was this hurt, beautiful, broken guy in Burnt Offerings. Then he grew out of some of it, partly because he became strong enough not to have to rely on anyone, and partly because of the love Anita and JC showed him. Then there was Nat, who he dominated, and as a whole he became a more healthy guy, because he was happy. He kept his mean streak, he was moody, but that made him more charming, more him. Now Hamilton decided he was too noisy, too moody, too jealous, too mean, too violent... Oy, wait, are we talking about the same guy here? No, because I thought that to be a seducer for 600 years, and the lover of another seducer for almost as long, you had to be a little more cool about the whole love thing. JC's "I made myself forget" that he was this shit he turned out to be in this novel is like Hamilton saying "Yo, guys, sorry, but I gotta do something to make the evil dwarf lady's life a little bit more realistic, having almost 20 people in her bed is a bit too much even for my perverted mind, so I'm going to cut them away as I see fit, disregarding everything I've ever written before." Yeah. Good doing.
Anita, who started her relationship with Asher with "It started as JC memories, but I do love you, Asher" ended with her not even caring about the whole thing.
I'm so fucking glad I downloaded this pirated I can't even say how much.
Shit. Just shit.



10 hours later

Okay, now that the ranting is over, and I've read what was left of the novel... well. I stand by all of the above, but I must say that some of this got better. Why? Partially because it still has plot, she didn't just forget ALL of the ongoing investigation, just bits of it. Like the fact that Anita should have been staking vampires at dawn, but didn't.
Asher tries to seduce everyone back in his bed, but it only works on JC. Somebody (maybe her editor) also reminded Hamilton that by now he should have had various operations to erase the scars and also accepted the evil dwarf lady's offer to try and heal them as she did Requiem's. His problems, as summarized, are "he hates himself so he can love no one else" (wait... wasn't this Richard?) and "he hasn't let you work on his scars because he's afraid of being perfect again" and my personal fave: "he needs therapy".
Hamilton keep trying to make Anita's lover go away. Just "go away" no rime or reason to it. One she almost kills, one she already killed, a few she completely forgot, a few others get mentioned just to make people (possibly her editor) shut up, so basically from almost 20 we are down to 5 or 6 men still in her live, because she just can't make them disappear without crippling the evil dwarf lady's power... and she wouldn't do that to herself... oh, wait, the "herself" was a lapsus I meant "Anita".
But! Miraculously Dolph is back, and with a completely new attitude. Why? How?? Who the hell knows, but people (probably her editor) liked him so he's back in the game.
Larry Kirkland is back too, and he too has a new attitude, this for the worse. Why!? How!?? Again, who the hell knows, since the man thought of Anita like a big sister and now, all of a sudden hates her to the point of calling her a murderer and a monster to her face. Well, again people (almost surely her editor) probably thought that she needed a little conflict at work to have RPIT back online.
Did you notice I mentioned an EDITOR? Yeah, apparently she finally found a continuity editor. Gal, listen to me, grow a pair and start telling her how it is possible for a character to evolve and how it's not. Thank you.
2 stars, because the first half of the novel was actually good, until she ruined it.
kisses all around.

[Sharon ∞❥ is an emotional book junkie ❥∞ · Rating 2 out of 5]

A rogue vampire seems to be attacking very young and much older people and changing them all in the name of freedom. The problem is they don't have the restraint they need and they end up killing people. Marshal Anita Blake is on the job with the rest of the team.

Sounds like the old Anita doesn't it? Well, it would be IF that was the only problem. Unfortunately, it's not. This book is extremely heavy on the narrative. LKH goes on and on and about the same things. I mean how many times can we hear that Anita is a bad *ss even though she's really short?? And she has to constantly prove that she's a capable Marshal and constantly justify all her relationships. It's almost too much.

The book is basically broken up into two segments. The first part mainly deals with the rogue vampires and it's not till the second half when Anita goes home that we get some boyfriend time. The boyfriend time is not as bad as it's been in the past especially since Anita seems to be thinking along the lines that maybe she has too many boyfriends. (ya think??)

I wish I could say that I enjoyed the boyfriend time but I didn't. It really has boiled down to just sex and rehashed sex scenes. There was no romance in this book at all. There is a part towards the end that culminates in some tenderness that might possibly count so it does give you a bit of hope.

Most of the gang is present in some way or form as well. Richard doesn't make an appearance but he is talked about so we do get an update. Same goes for a few others. And to be honest with you, this is one part where I'm glad that LKH is long on the narrative because I can't keep up with all her boyfriends!! I don't even know how many there are anymore.

All in all, it was okay. I'm still addicted to the series and I doubt that I will stop reading till it's over. I'm thankful there was no Olaf in this book although I had heard a rumor that his time is coming!

Favorite quote: (and it's from something else!!)

♦ "Try not. Do. Or do not. There is no try."