Gravitas: The 8 Strengths That Redefine Confidence

by Lisa Sun

National Bestseller! USA Today Bestseller!

Noted fashion entrepreneur and former McKinsey & Company consultant, Lisa Sun, shares the eight strengths that every woman can call upon to be confident and successful.

“Lisa comes across as young and overly enthusiastic at times. She should seek to have more gravitas.”

This is what Lisa Sun’s boss wrote in her first review as a business analyst at the global management consulting firm McKinsey & Company. Sun knew she wasn’t alone in receiving this type of feedback and over the course of the last two decades, she has been on a journey to uncover what it means to be truly confident.

In this thought-provoking and practical guide, Sun, founder of lifestyle brand Gravitas, has cracked the code to help women build their own self-worth on their own terms. By doing so

debunks the narrow view of confidence society has written for us redefines confidence as an inclusive construct that combines several innate strengthshelps you discover your “confidence language” and tap into the source of your self-beliefarms you with the tools to flex other strengths so you can shatter your expectations for yourself
Sun shares her own journey of self-discovery and growth and combines it with proprietary research, real-world examples, and anecdotes from other successful women who have championed their own definition of self-worth. Whatever stage of life you’re in, Gravitas offers valuable insights and strategies to help you succeed in any setting. Whether you are a mom, entrepreneur, creative soul, executive, thinker, maker, or doer, Sun will show you how you too can live life with total self-assurance and find your own gravitas.

Genres: Self Help, Business, Nonfiction, Leadership, Personal Development, Personal Growth, Womens

231 pages, Kindle Edition

Published September 12, 2023

About the author

Lisa Sun grew up in California, the daughter of Taiwanese immigrant parents. She overachieved at a young age, graduating from high school two years early and funding her Yale education with six part-time jobs, scholarships, and financial aid. After 11 years as a McKinsey & Company consultant, she took a solo trip around the world and started her own clothing line, Gravitas, that promotes body positivity and self-confidence. Launched in 2013, the company was featured in O Magazine, People, and the TODAY Show all within weeks of the company’s founding. The business has taken off since (featured on CNN and in Forbes, Fast Company, New York Magazine, Elle, Marie Claire, InStyle, and more), with a deep commitment to AAPI causes and New York City's Garment District. Often called the “dress whisperer,” Lisa is a highly sought-after public speaker who likes to impart her hard-won knowledge on gravitas and how to best harness it to other women.

Reviews

[Erin Ryder · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was good! Read an MSNBC article that inspired me to pick this up. Focuses on confidence styles and communication for women, in the workplace and beyond. Thought felt a tad long and could have been just as strong as an HBR case story.

[Stacey Wayman · Rating 5 out of 5]

Gravitas is a must-read book for our daughters, mothers, aunts, girlfriends, and any other woman of any age! I met Lisa and experienced her Confidence Closet a few years ago. I left invigorated and changed…for the better. Gravitas is something I’ve grappled with over my life - a struggle shaped by my experiences and gender. Understanding the language of confidence brings a whole new acceptance and celebration of who I am and direction to become who I want to be. I’ll be referring back to this book as a manual to deepen relationships with others and, even more so, with myself.

[Connie Nunez]

In her book 'Gravitas,' Lisa Sun offers a manual aimed at helping women redefine confidence and develop essential leadership skills. She emphasizes the importance of analyzing individual strengths, which she categorizes as 'superpowers.' These superpowers, such as giving, knowing, achieving, and believing, are common among women, with most possessing at least two or three. Sun identifies a gap in certain superpowers like creating, which are less popular among women, affecting their ability to excel in traditionally male-dominated roles.

Furthermore, the book highlights that many women aspire to strengthen their leadership capabilities, including leading, performing, and self-sustaining, yet these aspirations are less prevalent. Sun proposes practical ideas to bridge this gap, empowering women to enhance their confidence and language of leadership.

One notable concept introduced is 'Freudenfreude,' describing the joy derived from witnessing other women succeed as leaders. Sun explores strategies to foster solidarity among women, encouraging them to stand up as role models and allies for one another.

[Suzy · Rating 5 out of 5]

I recently had the opportunity to attend a webinar by TONE Networks with entrepreneur and author Lisa Sun. I have learned so much from that brief one hour and then by listening to her book Gravitas. I’m an avid reader, but something led me to the audible book for this one and I’m so glad I did. It’s like Lisa and I are together having coffee and she’s a good friend, my personal stylist, biggest cheerleader and mentor all in one.

If you want to grow personally and professionally in 2024 I highly recommend you read/listen to Gravitas! She dives into 8 different Super Powers in which we all have at least one. I resonated with Lisa’s mom and have all 8! Can’t wait to find out what Superpowers you have!

[Kiran K Adharapuram · Rating 4 out of 5]

Lisa Sun's GRAVITAS is an immaculate testament to her achievement. Owning a brand that echoes 'Intelligent function meets versatile fashion to empower the modern woman', Lisa is always an inspiration to modern women and an ascertained motivator for those who bring out the best in themselves.

With women empowerment as a centric theme resonating with her first boss feedback to bring out more Gravitas is the seed for thought for her journey that uncover and perpetuates confidence. As an aid to boost the mindset of embarkment, the author summarizes six holistic forces that flinch the self-belief and self-perpetuate loop. She also provides many use cases and the respective metrics supporting them.

One of my favorites in the book is where Lisa talks about the EIGHT strengths of Gravitas to unleash the superpower that talks about growth growth-driven confident mindset, which is the crux of the whole book. In later chapters, the author discloses the success mantra to build trust and exhibit empathy/warmth of relationships that bind for a better connection.

Don't miss the Super Power Quiz curated for every individual to access themselves and to work on those areas to enrich relationships and harness the women's super power. If you are somebody who is waiting for a push in your life and to insinuate Gravitas aka confidence to build self-worth this book is the right pick.

[Alicia Donkers · Rating 3 out of 5]

This wasn't exactly my cup of tea but I can definitely see it's value.

I really admire Lisa's perseverance to create a way to help women meet their highest potential and recognize things they don't easily recognize in themselves. I also think there are a lot of interesting and practical stories and pieces of advice which can provide good insight to people really struggling with confidence. I definitely know people in my life who would benefit from this type of book and appreciate the tone of its content.

My criticism is that I felt this book was extremely 'workplace focused' rather than building in confidence in all areas of life; while I imagine some learned confidence would spill over into other areas of life I felt the book focused on this very little. I personally would have enjoyed more information that felt less geared towards the workplace.

All this being said, Lisa has a lovely writing style and really amazing personal story of success.

[Olivia · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is an amazing addition to books on self-awareness and self-discovery. In the first part of the book, the author describes and explores the 8 confidence strengths (or “superpowers”) that all of us either fully possess, actively demonstrate or are still developing. These superpowers are 1)Leading, 2)Performing, 3)*Achieving, 4)Giving, 5)**Knowing, 6)**Creating, 7)**Believing and 8)*Self-Sustaining. Each of us is on our own journey in realizing these.
There’s a simple quiz to determine what your superpowers are.

The second part of the book further explores how these superpowers can be used to compliment the superpowers of others on the same team.
Great read over all. The reason I took a star away because some of the tables were a bit confusing to understand (there is an assumption that the reader knows how to understand those tables without an explicit set of instructions).

[Devin · Rating 3 out of 5]

Gravitas is clearly tied to the author’s brand, and at times it reads like an advertisement for her company, but overall I found it to be full of practical advice and thoughtful insights. I appreciated the balance of stories, research, and references to other leadership books I’ve enjoyed, especially with its focus on women’s leadership. While some of the personal stories felt repetitive, they underscored how deeply her “why” influenced her work. The book’s true strength lies in its framework of eight superpowers for achieving Gravitas, each detailed with examples, pitfalls, and development strategies, making it both inspiring and actionable.

Overall, I think Gravitas is a worthwhile read for anyone interested in confidence, leadership, and playing to your strengths while working on your growth areas.

[Claire · Rating 5 out of 5]

Gravitas is a book that EVERYONE needs to read. This book is not just for women - I think any person can benefit from Lisa Sun’s masterpiece. You can read this to understand and use your authentic power to grow and become the best version of yourself… or you can read this to acknowledge that there are many forms of confidence to appreciate the people around you in your professional or personal life.

Growing up in the intersection of Asian and American cultures, I felt confused navigating how to present myself in all aspects of life; should I be quiet and humble or bold and always center-stage? Gravitas has helped me realize that I can live in both of those worlds and that my other characteristics are also what make me confident and proud!

[Nicole · Rating 3 out of 5]

I liked the overall concept of the book, but I think it could have been distilled down to an essay rather than a book. The callbacks from chapter to chapter are so incredibly repetitive, it reads as though it was originally written to be a serial. That being said, the message - that the quiet, thoughtful personality types are just as valuable to the world as the more agressive, charismatic types - is hopeful and inspiring. At the same time, the book is realistic enough to admit that society as a whole still tends to reward the leader and performer types, so it sets out tools and actionable advice about how to get better at those traits if they're not your natural tendency.

[Karen Marie Lucas · Rating 2 out of 5]

Lisa was a keynote at a recent convention I attended and our book club affiliated with the organization opted to read it for September 2024. The book is written for women - especially those interested in clothes and sports - who are seeking to understand gravitas and confidence. The canon story from Lisa that lays the ground for the impetus of gravitas happens when she is 22 years old. It was an interesting read, but the book felt very repetitive and written with the intent of supporting the author's brand. It felt about 40 pages too long. Full disclosure: I've read dozens of books on this subject over the years; the author's message may be meant for a different demographic.

[Maansi Gagroo · Rating 3 out of 5]

i picked it up because Gravitas was identified as an area of improvement for me too in my corporate career by my manager ! Lisa Sun has her manager say the same and not knowing what it really means she asked her to explain. Lisa was told to go buy new clothes!!!

the start really resonates. I Loved some punchlines like daddy bonus and motherhood penalty
Gemd like 3 traits of women- Confidence, Competence and Warmnth. Miss any ond and you are labelled

But overall i think it was too long and repetitive it could have been a good case study or a research paper white paper. i moved after the third chapter to listen to her podcast and i think it more less covered the book contents🙆‍♀️

[Andrea O. · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is eye opening. It made me rethink what I've been taught about confidence. I'm not the most extroverted person, so being confident has always seemed out of reach. But this book made me see my superpowers (Achieving, Giving, Creating, Believing) which was amazing. I realize that some of the more mainstream forms of confidence like Leading and Performing are helpful in certain situations, but just aren't natural to me. Overall, this is a handbook for real confidence. Lisa is so relatable and authoritative at the same time. Highly recommend.

[Jane · Rating 5 out of 5]

Lisa Sun's advice is grounded in real life work experience at McKinsey and as a wildly successful fashion entrepreneur. She is thoughtful, super smart, empathetic and vulnerable - her stories help illuminate a different type of confidence from within that we can all tap into when the ground beneath feels shaky. She has coached countless women from dressing rooms to Board rooms, so her advice is spot on. Read this important book - and go to hear her speak if you can!

[Alecia Z · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a must read for all women every where!

“Let them have the old boys’ club. The sisterhood is so much stronger.”

When we lift each other up, we all shine.

We have to build our own confidence and then we can show up better, stronger, more confidently in every aspect of our lives!

Invest in yourself, read this book. Apply this book. It’s work worth doing - live your best life. Be your best self.

“The sisterhood is so much stronger.”

[Katherine · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the things I loved about the book is the quiz to learn your superpowers. It made me see myself in a new light. When I saw that I had 5 superpowers, I understood right away the point of the book. I'm not giving myself enough credit for my abilities. It was awesome to learn my confidence language and also learn which strengths I want to work on.

[Isabel · Rating 3 out of 5]

I think the middle part of this book describing the “superpowers” and how to channel them and possible weaknesses to guard against was really valuable. I like that this book gives people the language to describe their strengths and translate that into confidence. Some of the chapters felt a little redundant or filler-y to me.

[Austin Dane · Rating 5 out of 5]

OK people, this is well written and well thought out. For many of us having a framework and understanding of oneself while approaching life challenges is helpful. Reading Gravitas and following her formula more or less has helped me at work and with my partner. I’ve read it twice and it was even better the second time

[H C · Rating 5 out of 5]

Highly recommend this book for anyone who wants to feel more confident. Through her research Lisa has discovered different categories of confidence instead of being a one size fits all approach. I also recommend taking the quiz and sharing it with all your friends!!

[Colleen Fonseca · Rating 4 out of 5]

The first few chapters I was sort of thinking “ok this is very self- helpy and tough to get through.” After getting past this though, the book had some great gems. Chapters 2,3, 6 and 7 were pretty impactful.

[Laura W · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a thoughtful book supporting the author’s mission of supporting women. I liked how she mentions events from her own life to support her points while providing actionable framework for the reader.

[Lora Bishop · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent read in how to define your super powers to promote self confidence and how to use them in everything you do.
I was fortunate enough to be in attendance for Lisa’s speech to our women leaders at my company about this book.

[Jennifer Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a must read for women in leadership and women in general. I love the content and diving into our “superpowers” as females in leadership. I refer back to this book often when looking for insights into working through different situations. Bet on yourself!

[Denise · Rating 4 out of 5]

I've always enjoyed taking assessments to learn about myself in relation to other individuals and working in organizations. This was an interesting and helpful take on that theme. Taking the quiz online was easy and fast.

[Tekla Back · Rating 5 out of 5]

Finally a book that celebrates feminine (not just female) leadership strengths and styles. And who doesn’t love a quiz about themselves :) Came for the data, and left with the human stories.

[Malena · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is the book to buy the men in your life this holiday season. Read it, buy it.

[Rachel Marquis · Rating 5 out of 5]

Had the pleasure of listening to Lisa speak at a work event and snagged the book following her session. I really enjoyed Gravitas, a quick, easy, and empowering read!!

[Emily · Rating 3 out of 5]

Repetitive and verbose. Not recommended.

[Bailey · Rating 3 out of 5]

I like the concept and many of the thoughts provided throughout. However the last 30% or so really dragged on and felt repetitive, almost like the author was trying to read a minimum word count.

[Alaukita Shah · Rating 3 out of 5]

I attended one of Lisa Sun's talks and thought she was super energetic and motivating. I unfortunately did not feel the same way reading the book and felt like it was stretched out.