What do you think?
Rate this book
Getting Naked: Five Steps to Finding the Love of Your Life
From Harlan Cohen, the bestselling author of THE NAKED And 107 Other Issues You Might Run into in College, comes GETTING NAKED, an honest, hopeful guide to getting a date, falling in love―or lust―and finding happiness in love (and in life). With a simple 5-step approach to finding the love of your life, Harlan answers the most commonly asked questions from his syndicated advice column, his college tours, his website, and his newest book for Gen Y. He helped a generation make the most of college life, now he'll help them find the love of their lives.
320 pages, Paperback
First published April 10, 2012
20 people are currently reading
153 people want to read
Ratings & Reviews
Friends & Following
Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!
Community Reviews
Displaying 1 - 19 of 19 reviews
July 24, 2012
Oh my goodness gracious, where in the world do I start?!?!
Let's see...I read this book in about 2 days...begrudgingly on Day 2 and because I felt obligated to finish it (I always read a book straight to the end, even if its terrible). It seemed to get longer and longer the closer I got to finishing. This book began with what seemed to be a lot of promise, but fell flat on its binding. Quite often during my reading, I thought "Which is sadder: The fact that this guy wrote the book..or the fact that it was published? No wait. I got it. The saddest part is that trees were killed in order for this to be in my hands right now." I've never encouraged book burning, but if this was the winter time I would have definitely thrown it into our fireplace and allowed it to serve one purpose: to keep me warm. That being said, I can now go into why I wanted this book to become firewood.
The structure of this book was incredibly sloppy. I'm starting to believe that an editor was not hired to double check Mr. Cohen's work. Part 1 of the book was fine. I had no issues with it and it made me feel like I may get something really good out of it. Part 2 is where I started having problems. Part 2 is the main section. It makes up about 95% of the book. In Part 2, we are introduced to the Experiment and Cohen presents the 5-steps.
Problem #1: While discussing Step 1, Step 2 is frequently brought up. There I had to pause. My mind was like, "Whoa! Slow down buddy, I'm still in Step 1, don't jump the gun with Step 2."
Problem #2: Sure this ties back to #1, but it was even more irksome and deserves its own line. Once again, we are discussing Step 1, but before its even over, Steps 3-5 make an appearance. I'm here thinking , "Seriously?? Can't I just finish hearing what Step 1 is?"
Step 2 was entitled: "Training In Your Thong(s)." Before you freak out on me, this is meant Metaphorically, not Literally. However this leads me to my next issue.
Problem #3: When using a metaphor, don't bleed it dry! I can't even count how many times the "thong(s)" were mentioned...and quite frankly, I don't want to. Used once or twice, a metaphor is effective. Shoved in your face a million times, the metaphor loses its impact and becomes nothing but a numb phrase---it means nothing and when you read it, you just kinda glance over it and it isn't even absorbed or seen apart from the other words you've been reading. If you're going to use a metaphor, use proper technique so I don't get a headache just from hearing the word "thong." Or better yet, just don't use a metaphor.
Just when I thought I would finally be presented with some decent material, I found myself confused. Thoughts: "Didn't I just read this same paragraph in the last chapter? Wasn't this point already mentioned 3 times prior to this page?" Answer to my thoughts: YES.
Problem #4: There is WAY too much repetition. I understand the concept that some people learn better with repetition, but this is ridiculous. I found myself in an endless loop of Mr. Cohen's writing on the same points in different chapters. Instant boredom and annoyance attained at that point. I can take reading a point once...twice is bearable...but 3+ times is overkill. ESPECIALLY when the point is not in the least bit adjusted to fit into the information you are reading about.
What were you thinking Mr. Cohen? I was really looking forward to some really good advice and pointers before heading out into the wild world of dating, but I was completely let down and now I am having to find another book---written by someone with a college degree or three---on the same subject. I have, to be completely honest, learned way more from Hollywood movies such as Hitch, Must Love Dogs, and He's Just Not That Into You, than I have from this book (which is saying something since Hollywood is mostly fiction and exaggeration).
Here are the key points of Getting Naked (and pretty much all that can really be taken from it):
Take risks---if you see someone who gives you that feeling (you know the feeling I'm talking about), then talk to them, no matter what..don't think too much just do it. [This was nothing new to me, as I've already taken a few risks on my own, without this books' help]
You will get rejected, just accept it. Once your comfortable with that, you'll be good to go and take those risks I just mentioned. In the words of Mr. Cohen, "Thousands will want you, but millions will not."
"Put yourself in different rooms." Do things, meet people, talk to people, make lots of friends. Friends are very useful and provide a lot of potential opportunities for you if you allow them to.
This is basically all you need to know from this book...as that is all that actually makes sense and is useful in the long run.
The major downfall of this book was the structure. It was very unorganized and not very well put together. Although I must say, I very much enjoyed all the little anecdotes provided throughout the book. Some were very sweet and left me with some hope and inspiration.
All in all, this book was not a total waste...it has some good points. But, I would not recommend that anyone read it unless they can find a FREE copy at a library or if they have absolutely nothing else to do with their time.
See my other reviews at:
The Real World According To Sam
Let's see...I read this book in about 2 days...begrudgingly on Day 2 and because I felt obligated to finish it (I always read a book straight to the end, even if its terrible). It seemed to get longer and longer the closer I got to finishing. This book began with what seemed to be a lot of promise, but fell flat on its binding. Quite often during my reading, I thought "Which is sadder: The fact that this guy wrote the book..or the fact that it was published? No wait. I got it. The saddest part is that trees were killed in order for this to be in my hands right now." I've never encouraged book burning, but if this was the winter time I would have definitely thrown it into our fireplace and allowed it to serve one purpose: to keep me warm. That being said, I can now go into why I wanted this book to become firewood.
The structure of this book was incredibly sloppy. I'm starting to believe that an editor was not hired to double check Mr. Cohen's work. Part 1 of the book was fine. I had no issues with it and it made me feel like I may get something really good out of it. Part 2 is where I started having problems. Part 2 is the main section. It makes up about 95% of the book. In Part 2, we are introduced to the Experiment and Cohen presents the 5-steps.
Problem #1: While discussing Step 1, Step 2 is frequently brought up. There I had to pause. My mind was like, "Whoa! Slow down buddy, I'm still in Step 1, don't jump the gun with Step 2."
Problem #2: Sure this ties back to #1, but it was even more irksome and deserves its own line. Once again, we are discussing Step 1, but before its even over, Steps 3-5 make an appearance. I'm here thinking , "Seriously?? Can't I just finish hearing what Step 1 is?"
Step 2 was entitled: "Training In Your Thong(s)." Before you freak out on me, this is meant Metaphorically, not Literally. However this leads me to my next issue.
Problem #3: When using a metaphor, don't bleed it dry! I can't even count how many times the "thong(s)" were mentioned...and quite frankly, I don't want to. Used once or twice, a metaphor is effective. Shoved in your face a million times, the metaphor loses its impact and becomes nothing but a numb phrase---it means nothing and when you read it, you just kinda glance over it and it isn't even absorbed or seen apart from the other words you've been reading. If you're going to use a metaphor, use proper technique so I don't get a headache just from hearing the word "thong." Or better yet, just don't use a metaphor.
Just when I thought I would finally be presented with some decent material, I found myself confused. Thoughts: "Didn't I just read this same paragraph in the last chapter? Wasn't this point already mentioned 3 times prior to this page?" Answer to my thoughts: YES.
Problem #4: There is WAY too much repetition. I understand the concept that some people learn better with repetition, but this is ridiculous. I found myself in an endless loop of Mr. Cohen's writing on the same points in different chapters. Instant boredom and annoyance attained at that point. I can take reading a point once...twice is bearable...but 3+ times is overkill. ESPECIALLY when the point is not in the least bit adjusted to fit into the information you are reading about.
What were you thinking Mr. Cohen? I was really looking forward to some really good advice and pointers before heading out into the wild world of dating, but I was completely let down and now I am having to find another book---written by someone with a college degree or three---on the same subject. I have, to be completely honest, learned way more from Hollywood movies such as Hitch, Must Love Dogs, and He's Just Not That Into You, than I have from this book (which is saying something since Hollywood is mostly fiction and exaggeration).
Here are the key points of Getting Naked (and pretty much all that can really be taken from it):
Take risks---if you see someone who gives you that feeling (you know the feeling I'm talking about), then talk to them, no matter what..don't think too much just do it. [This was nothing new to me, as I've already taken a few risks on my own, without this books' help]
You will get rejected, just accept it. Once your comfortable with that, you'll be good to go and take those risks I just mentioned. In the words of Mr. Cohen, "Thousands will want you, but millions will not."
"Put yourself in different rooms." Do things, meet people, talk to people, make lots of friends. Friends are very useful and provide a lot of potential opportunities for you if you allow them to.
This is basically all you need to know from this book...as that is all that actually makes sense and is useful in the long run.
The major downfall of this book was the structure. It was very unorganized and not very well put together. Although I must say, I very much enjoyed all the little anecdotes provided throughout the book. Some were very sweet and left me with some hope and inspiration.
All in all, this book was not a total waste...it has some good points. But, I would not recommend that anyone read it unless they can find a FREE copy at a library or if they have absolutely nothing else to do with their time.
See my other reviews at:
The Real World According To Sam
June 6, 2012
A friend and I both read this book at the same time (we decided that summer 2012 was going to be about us trying to figure out this thing called dating), and I finished Getting Naked in two days. It is filled with my notes, and after day one of reading, I took one of Cohen's challenges, and it paid off. I am ready to try more of Cohen's challenges he suggested.
Cohen's book is filled with common sense ideas -- how about liking yourself before someone else likes you? Don't settle for a loser. Have standards, but date anyone who gives you that feeling. No your role in any situation.
Yet, what I find inspiring is his philosophy using numbers: Millions will reject you but thousands will love you.
Or how about this one: You will be rejected. It is the law of dating. But just because you're rejected, it does not mean anything is wrong with you. If there is something wrong with you, correct the behavior. If you don't know why you've been rejected move-on.
Loved this book. In fact, I bet I will read it again.
Cohen's book is filled with common sense ideas -- how about liking yourself before someone else likes you? Don't settle for a loser. Have standards, but date anyone who gives you that feeling. No your role in any situation.
Yet, what I find inspiring is his philosophy using numbers: Millions will reject you but thousands will love you.
Or how about this one: You will be rejected. It is the law of dating. But just because you're rejected, it does not mean anything is wrong with you. If there is something wrong with you, correct the behavior. If you don't know why you've been rejected move-on.
Loved this book. In fact, I bet I will read it again.
Read
May 22, 2024No regrets.
July 19, 2012
What a painful read. This book is so disorganized I couldn't really follow it. While I realize that it outlines 5 steps in the experiment, I only got two things from it. Talk to people who interest you and yes, not everyone will find you date worthy. No new information there!
The author talks about thongs a lot, which got annoying, especially since he left the most important ones out:
"I can't believe trees died to print this book thong"
"This books is tediously redundant, repetitious, and not only that it says the same things over and over thong" :P
"This book is painfully disorganized thong."
"Didn't he just say that thong."
"When do I actually get the steps thong."
"Thank goodness I did not buy this book thong."
"Thank goodness there was an end thong---though it did not come soon enough thong."
"Wishing the author a lifetime thong-wedgie thong for the pain I'm enduring while reading this."
"Can I get a root canal instead thong?"
"Please come up with your own sayings thong instead of 'borrowing' priceless Mastercard sayings thongs."
"Did a guido write this thong?"
"I can't believe other people rated this a 5 thong----am I reading the same book thong?"
*My teen won this on another book giveaway site. I decided to read it as she will soon enter the dating world. As a result of reading it, I headed down to the library to find better books for her to read on the subject of dating. After she read it we discussed how bad and contradictory a lot of it was---especially how bad it was! It did open the doors for us talking about bad dating advice and how badly written some books are so all was not lost.
The author talks about thongs a lot, which got annoying, especially since he left the most important ones out:
"I can't believe trees died to print this book thong"
"This books is tediously redundant, repetitious, and not only that it says the same things over and over thong" :P
"This book is painfully disorganized thong."
"Didn't he just say that thong."
"When do I actually get the steps thong."
"Thank goodness I did not buy this book thong."
"Thank goodness there was an end thong---though it did not come soon enough thong."
"Wishing the author a lifetime thong-wedgie thong for the pain I'm enduring while reading this."
"Can I get a root canal instead thong?"
"Please come up with your own sayings thong instead of 'borrowing' priceless Mastercard sayings thongs."
"Did a guido write this thong?"
"I can't believe other people rated this a 5 thong----am I reading the same book thong?"
*My teen won this on another book giveaway site. I decided to read it as she will soon enter the dating world. As a result of reading it, I headed down to the library to find better books for her to read on the subject of dating. After she read it we discussed how bad and contradictory a lot of it was---especially how bad it was! It did open the doors for us talking about bad dating advice and how badly written some books are so all was not lost.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
September 20, 2013
The problem with Google Play on Android is that it doesn't always tell you that the free book that you download is not the entire book. I liked the portion I downloaded enough to purchase a hard copy of the book.
Keep in mind I am not the biggest self-help book fan out there. I will say why this book works for me. Cohen uses a light, but well intentioned and well reasoned tone. In truth I had started some of the life practices that he recommends before I read the book. And, he has a couple of suggestions that I wish I knew about before my last dating relationship.
In addition, the tone is very general. I read some reviews which felt he should have been more gender specific. Multiple times throughout the book Cohen states the suggestions and advice are meant for straights, gays, lesbians, trans, men, women, etc. Personally I found nothing wrong with this.
So if you've been dating, or are trying to figure what to do when you date again, this is a pretty decent read. Especially if you don't mind an occasional chuckle while reading.
Keep in mind I am not the biggest self-help book fan out there. I will say why this book works for me. Cohen uses a light, but well intentioned and well reasoned tone. In truth I had started some of the life practices that he recommends before I read the book. And, he has a couple of suggestions that I wish I knew about before my last dating relationship.
In addition, the tone is very general. I read some reviews which felt he should have been more gender specific. Multiple times throughout the book Cohen states the suggestions and advice are meant for straights, gays, lesbians, trans, men, women, etc. Personally I found nothing wrong with this.
So if you've been dating, or are trying to figure what to do when you date again, this is a pretty decent read. Especially if you don't mind an occasional chuckle while reading.
May 14, 2012
Great dating advice no matter where you are in a relationship or out of one. As someone who is single I think the book gave great advice for putting yourself out there and taking risks. Also, acknowledging your part in the relationship troubles you face is something that not a lot of people like to discuss. I think this book is an amazing read that everyone should look at. Not everyone will agree to everything in it, like my friend who thinks knowing a lot about someone before you sleep with them (like a checklist-her words), isn't realistic. Honestly knowing someone's name-first and last-, whether they are single or not, and what the hooking up means isn't really a checklist to me, it sounds like a normal conversation. But I encourage everyone to look this book up and check it out!
Besides I love the title, it's what made me pick it up in the bookstore in the first place.
Besides I love the title, it's what made me pick it up in the bookstore in the first place.
July 29, 2016
This book is amazing! A fews of friends and I started to read as a joke but suddenly got really into it. The book is written very well, Cohen uses true stories and letters asking for advice to prove that this simple will work, in a funny, cleaver way. The information in the book is good valued and makes sense. Also, the layout of the book is in a logical order, there is only 5 step so it easy to remember. I love how many different angles he would present for every step. Also, there are links so you connect with other singles, and people looking for love and share your story and have someone in your corner, you can even messages Harlan Cohen, himself, which is amazing it shows he really does care about you. It just great book very helpful. This is the best relationship book I have ever read and actually finished because it was interesting and logical.
September 14, 2012
I started reading this book because Harlan Cohen came to Northeastern and did a presentation. I didn't attend myself, but from what I heard, it appeared to be really interesting. I now really wish that I had gone! Mr. Cohen's book was kind of inspiring, but mostly it was like reading 300 pages of compliments. Getting Naked is a little bit more about accepting yourself and becoming attractive through interior, radiating beauty than it is about waving a magic wand and getting a boyfriend. It's about coming out of your safe place and taking a risk. It really wasn't dry, either. It's full of humor and had me laughing out loud. I'm trying to get all of my friends to read it! It's totally worth it.
December 27, 2016
This is one of the best self-help books I've ever read! It's perfectly written, with lots of great advice and a major shift to your world view. The book deals heavily with our fear of rejection and how we view ourselves, especially in terms of the opposite sex. This is a great read for men or women, who are attempting to get back into the dating scene, or are simply having trouble forming relationships of any kind.
There's no bemoaning, or any "poor you"'s; just good, real-world advice that you can start using today to get out there, and begin looking for the relationships you want. This book was a total game changer for me, and I still use the advice I learned from it today, even though I read a few years ago.
There's no bemoaning, or any "poor you"'s; just good, real-world advice that you can start using today to get out there, and begin looking for the relationships you want. This book was a total game changer for me, and I still use the advice I learned from it today, even though I read a few years ago.
June 1, 2012
I came across this book at my local library. It was about to close and I grabbed the first book I saw that looked somewhat interesting.
I had no idea that in my hands was one of the best books I've read. This book is amazing. Harlan is so good at describing the process of dating and how to better your self as an individual. I couldn't put this book down! It helped me out quite a bit and opened up a whole new world.
I've already suggested it to some of my friends and I suggest you read it as well.
I had no idea that in my hands was one of the best books I've read. This book is amazing. Harlan is so good at describing the process of dating and how to better your self as an individual. I couldn't put this book down! It helped me out quite a bit and opened up a whole new world.
I've already suggested it to some of my friends and I suggest you read it as well.
June 24, 2013
Its a little painful to read. I "purchased" this on my Google Library, it was free, so I thought I'd try it out. I just didn't like the concept the author was going after, it was really disorganized and the thong reference was mentioned a lot, it started to get annoying. I usually read self-help books because I find them fun to read, but this one didn't seem to have that something special to it that a lot of other self-help books have.
January 21, 2016
Just like all relationship books, its really common sense packaged in different ways. I really liked how this one is packaged and it sort of changed the way I approach dating. May not resonate with some but I think it was an excellent jump off for hearing the relationship common sense advice.
February 18, 2013
Pretty good read
July 27, 2013
It's all about being vulnerable, and open to love and acceptance, but not just from someone else, from yourself. Old truths presented provocatively to get new attention.
September 19, 2013
This book was alright. it seemed interesting in the beginning but after awhile the author started repeating himself.
March 25, 2016
I'm calling it on this one. I wasn't actually looking for dating advice I just wasn't in the mood to listen to a novel or biography and this was a recommendation from another book I read.
September 26, 2015
Would highly recommend to anyone struggling with dating and relationships, especially if the hardest part for you right now is finding someone!
January 1, 2018
It had funny parts, but about three hours into the audiobook, I was done. I powered through.
Do these books ever cover new ground? It was okay, but not something I'd recommend to others.
Do these books ever cover new ground? It was okay, but not something I'd recommend to others.
June 21, 2015
Well-written, easy to read (or listen to, in my case), heart-felt, honest, helpful and inspiring.
Displaying 1 - 19 of 19 reviews