Wednesdays were Pretty Normal: A Boy, Cancer, And God

by Michael Kelley

“Wednesdays were pretty normal,” writes Michael Kelley, looking for a bright spot amidst the chemotherapy routine brought on by his two-year-old son Joshua’s cancer diagnosis. His book of the same name offers much to anyone who’s tired of prescriptive spirituality and would rather acknowledge and work through the difficulties of faith with some transparency.

Joshua battled and beat the disease, but not before his family had to reconcile what it means to believe in God despite a broken world. His dad’s personal account of that fight to survive sparks a larger discussion of how Christians must learn to walk in the light of Christ’s promises despite the dark shadows of earthly pain. Indeed, it’s pain that sometimes opens the door to a deeper experience with Jesus, an authentic relationship that holds steady even when life loses the comfort of normalcy.

Genres: Nonfiction, Christian, Biography, Christian Living, Theology, Memoir

264 pages, Paperback

First published February 4, 2012

About the author

Michael Kelley is an author, editor, and communicator whose previous works include Holy Vocabulary: Rescuing the Language of Faith and The Tough Sayings of Jesus. Born in Texas, Michael holds a Master of Divinity degree from Beeson Divinity School in Birmingham, Alabama. Michael and his wife have three children and live in Nashville, Tennessee.

Reviews

[Seth · Rating 5 out of 5]

Full disclosure: I grew up with Michael. This isn't a name-drop opportunity for me; like, "hey I know the author, we used to chill". Bear with my anecdote: Among other activities, we both played first base in high school baseball; he on varsity and I on J.V. On the days the first basemen took fielding practice together, Michael always stood in stark contrast to the other varsity players. He didn't get involved in the coarse joking of adolescent boys, but he wasn't aloof. He was engaged with his peers, offering encouragement to the younger players and kindness to his peers. He became my college pastor after I graduated, then he moved off to seminary. Later, when his son was diagnosed, I followed the story, and prayed along with his family. So reading this book was kind of like reading a condensed version of a protracted tertiary episode of my own life from someone else's point of view. I give this anecdote partly because I can't give an objective review, but also to say that books like these - didactic memoirs - hinge on the integrity of their authors. Michael has had integrity since he was a kid. He's trustworthy which alone makes the book worth reading. But the conflict at the source of the book, the diagnosis of his 3-year-old son with leukemia, and the working out of the resolution (which to Michael's credit, he never really arrives at but constantly works toward in faith) is compelling.

I think this story and others of its ilk should be more present in the public discourse of the church. Lamenting in faith is another way of declaring our belief that God will deliver us, which ultimately is another reason to rejoice.

[Margaret · Rating 4 out of 5]

I was very drawn to this book because I had a son that was also named Joshua like the author's son, and my Joshua also had leukemia. He was diagnosed in 1979 though, when he was 7, so we had a different outcome. I identified with a lot of the book though. The treatments, the sleepless nights and so much more. I don't know if you will connect with the book quite as much as I did, but it's a good read for someone going through hard times and not knowing quite what to make of it.

[Mathew · Rating 5 out of 5]

Skillful Story Telling

I wasn’t sure what to expect when I received Wednesdays Were Pretty Normal (WWPN). I knew the book was about a family’s journey as their son had cancer. I was probably expecting a book that was more autobiographical but what I got was a well crafted story which did indeed tell their family’s story but placed that story within the larger context of the one story. I can’t recall reading a book which was so theological rich and compelling but also well developed as a story. I’m not afraid to admit that as a father of two beautiful little girls around the age of the Kelley’s son I trembled, cried, and rejoiced through out their story. Micheal carefully chose snapshots of their struggle to encourage and teach us and to demonstrate the work of God in their lives.

It might be easy to write a story of this sort that ends up being overly sentimental but Michael was able to avoid this pitfall.
He describes receiving the news of his son’s leukemia,

We had been to the doctor before. But something was different this time. Then he started saying words that I never expected to hear: “hematology”; “children’s hospital”; “call your wife”. [sic] Then he said the word that would become part of our everyday vocabulary at heart-breaking speed: “leukemia.”

What do you do with a word like that? How do you respond? What questions do you ask? I didn’t know; I still don’t know. But I think I do know that there are some words in our vocabulary that are heavier than others. They are the kind of words that linger in the air long after they are said. They echo in your mind and pierce your heart over and over again, and when they are first spoken, they drop to the pit of your stomach like lead. Leukemia. (p. 5)


What he did was skilfully weave their family’s story within larger biblical truths while also offering rigorous application. WWPN will challenge your notion about faith. It will jostle you wake and make you face the groanings of this fallen world head on. But Michael does not snuff out the flickering wick.

The Fight for Faith

A common theme that pops up through out WWPN was the fight for faith. He challenges the American notion that faith is merely a personal relationship and assenting to certain facts about Jesus and, while strongly holding to faith as a gift from God, he also strongly argues that our pilgrimage through life requires a constant fight for faith by the power of the Spirit (see chapter 10 and especially pp. 143-45). We must lay hold of this truth and hold it dearly.

I cannot recommend WWPN highly enough. I’ve already purchased two copies for members of my family and recommended to a half dozen other people I know who are going through their struggles and who could benefit greatly from the Kelley’s faith-building testimony. I wish WWPN was available four years ago when I was struggling intensely with my own faith. Don’t hesitate. Purchase this book now.

[Melody Raines · Rating 4 out of 5]

When I had cancer, I quit reading cancer memoirs. They frustrated me.

"Why can’t this lady get beyond the superficial, cliché and commercialized messages of suffering?" I scoffed as I threw another book into the garage sale pile. "How could anyone go through an ordeal like this and still not get it?"

Many of the cancer memoirs I read felt incomplete and stale. (Except for SAME KIND OF DIFFERENT AS ME. That would be an exception.)

WEDNESDAYS WERE PRETTY NORMAL is not a cancer memoir. This book is a genre-bender. It’s a cross between a memoir and a Bible study/Tim Keller sermon. I’d say only about 30% of it is Michael Kelley’s own story. (Yes, I made up that statistic on the spot.) The rest of the book is about how Kelley applied the truths of the stories in the Bible to his own struggles. This kinda turned me off in the first two chapters because I had expected to veg out with a modern memoir. But by chapter three, I was hooked. And it kept getting better.

I was amazed by how much Kelley’s learning path resembled my own. He covers many of the same Bible stories and themes God used to guide and heal my heart during my cancer experience (he must have read my book), but he goes much deeper and does a great job of making the stories come alive. I learned a lot from his wisdom, even though I thought I had already excavated those truths pretty thoroughly. (Now who’s the superficial and trite one?) That’s a testament to Kelley’s insistence on pressing into the pain and the healing, and to the unsearchable depths of the remarkable story God has written—and invited us to be a part of.

Kelley gives us some great practical theology. He’s a pretty good exegete, teacher and storyteller all rolled into one. Overall, this is a book for thinkers, but it has a few moments for you feelers too—and some good stories about baseball.

I do wish Kelley had given the gospel greater prominence. It’s definitely woven throughout the book (in beautiful, Tim Keller style), but I wish it had its own climactic scene—something to bring the readers face to face with their own undeniable need for the gospel. There was a lot of wise counsel in this book, but I wish it could have also served a greater transformative purpose. (Then again, maybe I missed it because I was reading way past my bedtime.)

I would have loved to walk through cancer with the Kelleys. I’m gonna recommend this book to believers who are walking through suffering. It’s especially good for caregivers or those who are walking with sufferers.

[Christina · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ironically, Joshua was in my son's preschool class when he was diagnosed with leukemia. My path crossed with his mom Jana again several years later in a Bible study small group. As she shared parts of their story, I knew I still waned to know more. There is much to learn from their journey, and Michael does an excellent job honestly sharing what it feels like to struggle with a crisis, not lose faith, and still yet gain trust in God. The chapters Identity, Together and Limp really resonated with me.

[Tina Lewis · Rating 5 out of 5]

I didn't expect this book to be as amazing as I feel it is. The cover is pretty engaging (I'm a vegan and I love PB&J sandwiches) and the price was right when I bought it as a Nook book quite a while back. I came across it again in my Nook collection and I'm glad I did.

What it is not: It is not a play-by-play account of a sick child ("Then we went to the hospital, then the nurse gave him his medication, etc.). Nor is it a manual on caregiving or illnesses. There are hardly any medical terms and there are no elaborate disease explanations.

What it is: An honest spiritual examination layered on the backdrop of the author's son's leukemia diagnosis and treatment.

This is a walk with the author through many spiritual questions and many Biblical passages (not too many, but ones you are likely familiar with but never thought of in this context before.) I'm really thankful to have read it. There is much to chew on here and I am grateful to the author for writing down his thoughts and questions so I could "travel" along. I'm better for having taken this journey with him.

[Kelly · Rating 2 out of 5]

I picked up this book after reading the top review, but sadly I had enough discrepancy with some of the author's theology (God's hand in evil and suffering, for instance), as well as found many of the philosophical and Biblical connections and musings long-winded and laborious, that I couldn't truly connect with his story—though I sincerely wanted to, because his honesty and authenticity alone deserve it.

[Lathan Craft · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book may be one of the best books I've read about suffering. You can feel Michael's pain with him, you can rejoice with Michael, and at points, you feel like you're about to cry the same tears he cried. I loved that every chapter pointed back to the Gospel and how he Kelley was transparent with his own thoughts toward God. Emotion is real, faith is a verb, and belief is work. Thank you, Michael.

[Emy · Rating 3 out of 5]

It was more of a deep devotional flower that bloomed from intense life experiences. Enriching!

[Claire Yar · Rating 1 out of 5]

Awful. This book should be titled Wednesdays were Pretty Normal: A bible study. Seriously, I got 66 pages in and learned more about Christ than the cancer journey. Couldn't finish it. Yuck.

[Barbara Harper · Rating 5 out of 5]

Although I’ve wrestled with the truth of God’s allowing suffering many times and come to some kind of peace with it, I still have to go through those truths some times, especially concerning the suffering of a child. Even though I knew this book would be heart-rending and gut-wrenching, I wanted to hear the story and hear how the author dealt with it. I think I am so often drawn to books like this because I know the truths the author has learned are not going to be just armchair theology: they’ve been tested in the extremities of real life, life that isn’t going the way one would have expected or hoped.

The story begins with a visit to the doctor to treat a rash on two and a half year old Joshua, the author’s son. A blood test showed that Joshua had leukemia, with 82% of his blood cells affected. Immediately questions flooded Michael’s stunned mind: the physical (Are you sure? He looks fine! How do we treat this? Is Joshua going to die?) as well as the spiritual (Why, God? Did we do something wrong?).

Michael then tells about Joshua’s three year chemotherapy regimen, the effects of not only the chemotherapy but also the massive amounts of steroids, time in the hospital, the strain of not being able to play with other kids or even go on a fast food playground due his immune system, hair loss, etc. The title comes from the fact that Wednesdays were the day before Joshua’s regular cancer treatments, so he was feeling his best and those days were more normal than the rest.

But most of the book is spent on how the author dealt with his son’s illness and its effects spiritually. Having grown up with his basic needs being met and without any really major problems, he “realized faith had never been hard. It had never been work. But it surely was now.”

The author writes, “There is nothing quite like pain to force long-held ideals and beliefs from the comfort of intellectualism into the discomfort of reality and trying to square with them there.”

“This was a moment when we couldn’t just have faith; we had to choose faith. It had to be as conscious as any other decision…. If my family was really going to choose faith, then we would have to come to grips with the fact that there are parts of God and His plan that at best we don’t understand; at worst we don’t even like. We could no longer pick and choose certain parts of our belief system; we had to embrace it all.”

I'm predicting this will be one of my top ten books read this year. My full review is here: http://barbarah.wordpress.com/2014/05...

[Shana · Rating 5 out of 5]

To be honest, I passed on this book a few times when it was on my Vine selections. I really don't know why I did. Perhaps, I thought it would be too real and depressing. For some reason, I went back and selected it, not really sure if I had made the right choice. You see, I haven't been attending a church. I'm a Christian, I believe in Jesus Christ as my Savior, been baptized, but, I have been sort of "disillusioned" by organized church congregations, some of which say that if you have "faith" than bad things will not happen to you, or if something bad does happen in your life than there must be some sort of sin or something that you are doing wrong against the will of God. Well, I've never agreed with that and I don't think Job did either. In fact the man who wrote one of the most beautiful hymns "It is Well with my Soul" by Horatio Spafford had so many tradegies in his life and he wrote that song after. I think in a nutshell that song matches this book.

Anyway, in this true book, the author's young son gets diagnosed with leukemia. He and his wife are very active in the church and he is what I would call a leader in the church. He witnesses, he's the spiritual leader in his household, he's basically doing everything good and right, he even witnessed and encouraged people with sick children before by saying have "faith". Of course, it's easy to say "have faith" when your child is healthy, your bank account is full and everything is going your way.

When his own child gets diagnosed with leukemia, he has to reevaluate what "faith" really is. As the author basically says, "faith" is really having the courage to be honest with the Lord and admit your doubt and worries, yet know that for whatever reason, what you are going through is for God's glory, even if it doesn't work out the way you want it to, or even if you don't know why God would allow something. As, he illustrates by scripture through many stories, including the story of Job and the story of Lazarus, Mary and Martha. The author also, uses his own personal thoughts, weaknesses and feelings toward God during this time.

I could really relate to this book. I liked that he told his personal story, without getting too theological. Jesus also always spoke in a simple way, so everyone could understand him. I found this book very accessible to anyone, Christian or non-Christian. Though, I'd highly recommend for Christians to read this book. I loved it.

[Laura · Rating 4 out of 5]

Two-year-old Joshua Kelley was diagnosed with leukemia. Michael Kelley, his father, wrote Wednesdays Were Pretty Normal, looking for a bright spot in the course of Joshua’s chemotherapy routine for three years.

This is a book that takes you through the throes of anger at seeing your child suffer, questioning God, disillusionment, depression, loss of faith, recapturing faith, hope, trust, love, and everything else you can imagine that parents go through when their child receives the C-diagnosis.

Though this is a fallen world of sin, sickness and loss, Michael does not leave you aloft with these struggles. He shows you how God takes you through the process of working through you as the parent(s), the trust and hope that He provides for you to sustain you through the horrendous ordeal, the gift of friends and family so you aren’t alone, and the promises in His Word. You can choose to allow the journey to leave you angry at God or lead you to a closer relationship with Jesus, one that holds you together while you traverse this world that lacks normalcy.

Michael Kelley’s book is transparent. He unabashedly opens up every avenue and frustration within himself during those difficult years. His personal story will let you know that what you think and/or say isn’t out of the ordinary. But most of all, he leaves you with hope and trust in Jesus, regardless of the circumstances, the dark days of cancer and the possibilities of a relapse. Michael’s book will minister to you and help you through the rough times. It’s part of God’s gift to you. (See 2 Corinthians 1:3-7)

“These things I have spoken to your, that in Me you may have peace. In this world you will have tribulations, but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” John 16:33. And my favorite, “In the multitude of my anxieties with in me, Your comforts delight my soul.” Ps. 94:19.

Though this book is about family stress, strain and struggling with God’s intervention of childhood cancer, it can also be used for other areas of life where normalcy has been disrupted. I found it useful for my own situation as well.

Special thanks to Haverly Pennington of Lifeway for sending me a review copy.

[☼Bookish in Virginia☼ · Rating 4 out of 5]

First and foremost WEDNESDAYS WERE PRETTY NORMAL is a book for Christians. Yes, it's also about every parent's nightmare, and Michael Kelley does share his families experiences with having a child with life-threatening leukemia, but his perspective is so overwhelmingly Bible oriented that I'm sure it's not going to satisfy folks that don't want to analyze biblical scripture.

That said, parts of this book are philosophical genius. And that's the part of this book that I came away most impressed by. Kelley, you see, faced what few of us have to. He was faced with not only having a sick child, but with having his basic world-view ground up and shredded.

Kelley saw himself as well-off. He defined himself as a man who dressed in trendy clothes, who flew off to far flung places to teach and lecture. And then suddenly one day he had to give up that life and in a sense all he knew about himself. In one foul swoop he had to take a regular job. And he had to face overwhelming medical bills that threatened to bankrupt his family, and... doubt. Doubt about why this was happening. Doubt about how he and his wife could get through this horrible time. And ultimately doubt about what he knew about his God and his faith.

Kelley shares what he discovered about the nature of faith and the universe in this book and some of his writing about life and faith is as good as anything I've ever read.

My only disappointment --of one star-- is that I thought the story of his family's experience faded in significance as the book progressed.

So glad things are better for them.

Pam T~

[Karen Stidham · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a sobering, faith lifting, honest read of the struggle this man experienced. It is well written and easy to read. I read it in a few days around my work and other life schedules, because I didn't want to put it down until I had grasped the whole story.

[Tonya · Rating 5 out of 5]

Normal, how normal could life be if your 2 year old son was diagnoased with leuekmia? Michael Kelley opens up about his struggles with his faith in God once his son Joshua was diagnosed and they moved through treatments and beyond.

He clearly states what passages he read, trying to find out why God would let this happen. Why wasn't God showing up to heal Joshua and make everything right again? Was it because Michael and his wife didn't truly have faith?

Read their story of God's message to all of us with struggles. I think when he said they felt like they were walking through quicksand and saw one set of footprints, it was God's, He was carrying them. He carries us through these trials.

If He brings you to it, He will bring you through it.

Blessings to the Kelley family. I loved this heartwarming, honest and truthful story of your sincere struggles and coming to realize where God really was.

[Georgia Herod · Rating 5 out of 5]

A painfully honest, provocative, and profoundly hopeful and encouraging book based on the real life experience of Michael and Jana Kelley, who walked through their two-year-old son's diagnosis and three-year treatment of leukemia. For all of us who ask "Why?" when bad things happen, Kelley would say, "I don't have an answer, but I know Who does." Over and over, even in the darkest hours, he points to a sovereign God who is always good, whose character is love.

In a season of loss myself, I found myself saying, "Yes, yes, yes" over and over again. Kelley has asked the hard questions and run to the arms of the Loving Father. Nothing he says is preachy; it is simply sharing of the heart.

I highly recommend this book to all who are hurting, who are wrestling with God. It is a beautiful book!

[Brenda · Rating 5 out of 5]

can't imagine getting the news that a child has leukemia. In "Wednesdays Were Pretty Normal" that's the news that Michael and his wife Jana hear about their two year old son Joshua. The author doesn't sugar coat the story, instead his honesty as his family comes to terms with the diagnosis, gives the reader a true glimpse of how anyone's life can quickly change. Michael allows us to see his struggles and doubts but more than that we see God's love and faithfulness in the pages of this story.
Overall, a story that I felt would be emotionally wrenching, instead it left me feeling uplifted and encouraged.

A complimentary copy of this book was provided by the publisher in exchange for an honest review.

[Cyndi Beane-Henry · Rating 5 out of 5]

When their two-year-old son is diagnosed with leukemia, Michael and Jana Kelley's life screeches to a halt as they devote themselves one hundred percent to his care and cure. What ensues is an emotional and spiritual realization, an awakening, that literally builds a firm foundation with the One who sees and knows all.


Kelley leads us through his journey, and how an incredible three years with his son's illness brought him to where he is today.


I give this book Five Stars and a big Thumbs Up!




****DISCLOSURE: This bok was provided by Amazon Vine in exchange for an independent and non-biased rview.


This book was completed on 5 July 2012.

[Brent Rosendal · Rating 5 out of 5]

This was an awesome book and it took me by surprise. I thought it was going to be an biography about the things that happened in the Kelley family after they received the news that their 2 year old son had luekemia. The book is part biographical but the majority of the book deals with heart felt lessons the author learned as his son battled with the disease. The author really opens up about what it means to suffer. He doesn't gloss over any of the feelings and questions he had during the time. This book was probably one of the most insightful books I've read about suffering. I will definitely be reading this book again!

[Laura · Rating 3 out of 5]

The father of a two-year-old boy with leukemia wrote this touching account of his struggle to accept the diagnosis and treatment while trying to hold on to his faith. It goes way deeper than just a story about the walk through leukemia. It is more about his walk through faith, questioning God, and seeking some answers. Although I enjoyed the way he related familiar Bible characters and stories to his own situation, I would have liked to hear more about his own family and their personal experience.

[Amy · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book is about processing your doubts, pains, fears, heartache, and how you reason and eventually have to accept your trials. Grief can be the loss of many things. Grief can be the loss of relationship, the loss of trust, the loss of the plans you had for the future, and even the loss of time. How you deal with the grief or trials you face will mold your character for better or worse. Having experienced loss of relationship and loss of trust with some, this book was really near to my heart. It is an honest process of how to deal in life's trials.

[Daryl White · Rating 5 out of 5]

This isn't a book primarily about dealing with cancer, though that is the author's circumstance and perspective. Rather, the book does an excellent job of surveying the emotions we all encounter whatever the source of our trial. It might be illness or financial stress or relationship struggles or time of war. It does not matter.

The is a look at his to find and pursue God in the midst of suffering and difficulty. I strongly recommend it, particularly if you find yourself in a place of being angry with God over the circumstances of life.

[Anthony Alvarado · Rating 5 out of 5]

This book was a huge blessing to me, huge. Chapter 9 was like a breath of fresh air and I will never read Jeremiah 29 the same ever again. Connecting the situation of Jeremiah 29 with my family's own right now was a like a catharsis. The Word never stops blowing me away with how relevant it really is and how God has a word for us wherever we're at. Kelley's book was a gift to my relationship with Jesus in this just past the beginning battle with cancer that our 3 yr old is enduring.

[James · Rating 4 out of 5]

With simplicity and elegance, Michael tells the story of his family's journey through cancer with his two year old son-- from diagnosis day to the end-of-chemo celebration. He alternates between narrative-- this is what happened, and theology-- this is how I tried to make sense of it. The result is one of the most profoundly beautiful theodicies I've read. I will treasure this book, and recommend it to anyone who's ever wondered why they've been led by a loving God through places of pain.

[Amy · Rating 3 out of 5]

Each chapter has a one-word title, words like Diagnosis, Doubt, Recovery. The chapter explains how the word applied to the family's journey, then goes in-depth with finding parallels to stories in the Bible. I found that the parallels were at times very labored and drawn out, and I found myself losing interest.

Disclosure: I received a free copy of this book via the Amazon Vine program in exchange for posting my honest review on the Amazon site.

[Doug Dale · Rating 4 out of 5]

A surprisingly deep book where the author shares the story of his son's leukemia. Walking through this life-changing experience caused him to closely re-examine his faith. An experience that could have shattered his faith instead made it deeper and the insights he has along the way will be a help to anyone who reads this book.

[Wanda · Rating 2 out of 5]

It was ok. I had expected this book to mostly be the story of his family's experience with his son's leukemia, but it seemed to me to be mostly "Why me/us/him, God?" and then trying to answer that question. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but I had expected something different.

[Melinda Elgot · Rating 5 out of 5]

Going through a battle with childhood cancer with our daughter, this book spoke honestly and with hope. I often thought while reading it that his thoughts and words came straight from my heart. Fantastic book with biblical truth and hope beyond circumstance.

[Kimberly Simpson · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a memoir about the authors walk with God after his son is diagnosed with leukemia. He shines a light on the darker places of faith, with honesty and insight on every page. This is one of the most meaningful books i have ever read.