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My Death
A widowed writer begins to work on a biography of a novelist and artist—and soon uncovers bizarre parallels between her life and her subject’s—in this chilling and singularly strange novella by a contemporary master of horror and fantasy.
The narrator of Lisa Tuttle’s uncanny novella is a recent widow, a writer adrift. Not only has she lost her husband, but her muse seems to have deserted her altogether. Her agent summons her to Edinburgh to discuss her next book. What will she tell him? At once the answer comes to she will write the biography of Helen Ralston, best known, if at all, as the subject of W.E. Logan’s much-reproduced painting Circe , and the inspiration for his classic children’s book.
But Ralston was a novelist and artist in her own right, though her writing is no longer in print and her most storied painting too shocking, too powerful—malevolent even—to be shown in public. Over the months that follow, Ralston proves a reluctantly cooperative subject, even as her biographer uncovers eerie resonances between the older woman’s life and her own. Whose biography is she writing, really?
The narrator of Lisa Tuttle’s uncanny novella is a recent widow, a writer adrift. Not only has she lost her husband, but her muse seems to have deserted her altogether. Her agent summons her to Edinburgh to discuss her next book. What will she tell him? At once the answer comes to she will write the biography of Helen Ralston, best known, if at all, as the subject of W.E. Logan’s much-reproduced painting Circe , and the inspiration for his classic children’s book.
But Ralston was a novelist and artist in her own right, though her writing is no longer in print and her most storied painting too shocking, too powerful—malevolent even—to be shown in public. Over the months that follow, Ralston proves a reluctantly cooperative subject, even as her biographer uncovers eerie resonances between the older woman’s life and her own. Whose biography is she writing, really?
144 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 2004
198 people are currently reading
23387 people want to read
About the author
Lisa Tuttle
272 books411 followers(Wife of Colin Murray) aka Maria Palmer (house pseudonym).
Lisa Tuttle taught a science fiction course at the City Lit College, part of London University, and has tutored on the Arvon courses. She was residential tutor at the Clarion West SF writing workshop in Seattle, USA. She has published six novels and two short story collections. Many of her books have been translated into French and German editions.
Lisa Tuttle taught a science fiction course at the City Lit College, part of London University, and has tutored on the Arvon courses. She was residential tutor at the Clarion West SF writing workshop in Seattle, USA. She has published six novels and two short story collections. Many of her books have been translated into French and German editions.
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October 23, 2025
First released in 2004 by an independent UK publisher, and pretty hard to come by these days, this new edition from NYRB Classics should bring a lot of new eyes to this bizarre, tiny gem, thankfully.
Not quite horror but more of a semi-autobiographical literary tale, with subtle intrusions of the otherworldly that become more apparent as the story progresses. It’s a first-person account of an author (obviously partially based on Tuttle herself) who becomes obsessed with a forgotten writer and artist from the 1920s, and plans to write a book about her life. Little does our narrator know that this author/artist is still alive in her late 90s, and when she finally meets her, some odd coincidences and similarities in their lives have frightening implications, either for her own sanity, or for reality itself.
This was a quick read at a little over 100 pages — the rest is taken up by an informative introduction by thriller writer Amy Gentry — and I was entirely enveloped from nearly the beginning. The prose is graceful and engaging, as usual for Lisa Tuttle, and she has always been adept at slowly injecting the creepy and inexplicable into mundane reality. And it’s no different here. What seems at first like a straight-laced literary novella with feminist themes somehow morphs into a total mind-bender.
I’m glad Tuttle didn’t attempt to stretch this into a full-length novel, as 100 pages is just about the perfect length for this sort of strange, unsettling story.
Hopefully this release will allow readers who would otherwise never come across her work to discover and appreciate her gift for the beautifully uncanny.
ETA: Just thought I’d mention that this novella was also published in Best New Horror 16 and The Mammoth Book of The Best Of Best New Horror in case you want a bunch of other stories as well.
Not quite horror but more of a semi-autobiographical literary tale, with subtle intrusions of the otherworldly that become more apparent as the story progresses. It’s a first-person account of an author (obviously partially based on Tuttle herself) who becomes obsessed with a forgotten writer and artist from the 1920s, and plans to write a book about her life. Little does our narrator know that this author/artist is still alive in her late 90s, and when she finally meets her, some odd coincidences and similarities in their lives have frightening implications, either for her own sanity, or for reality itself.
This was a quick read at a little over 100 pages — the rest is taken up by an informative introduction by thriller writer Amy Gentry — and I was entirely enveloped from nearly the beginning. The prose is graceful and engaging, as usual for Lisa Tuttle, and she has always been adept at slowly injecting the creepy and inexplicable into mundane reality. And it’s no different here. What seems at first like a straight-laced literary novella with feminist themes somehow morphs into a total mind-bender.
I’m glad Tuttle didn’t attempt to stretch this into a full-length novel, as 100 pages is just about the perfect length for this sort of strange, unsettling story.
Hopefully this release will allow readers who would otherwise never come across her work to discover and appreciate her gift for the beautifully uncanny.
ETA: Just thought I’d mention that this novella was also published in Best New Horror 16 and The Mammoth Book of The Best Of Best New Horror in case you want a bunch of other stories as well.
February 6, 2024
Unsettling and evocative, Lisa Tuttle’s novella has a mythic quality that sometimes reminded me of Arthur Machen, expressed through her use of remote, eerie landscapes and referencing of ancient cycles of birth, death and rebirth. It revolves around a woman who’s stalled in her writing career, grieving and adrift after her husband’s sudden death. A chance encounter with a painting of Circe in an Edinburgh art gallery leads her to reflect on its model, artist and author Helen Ralston. Ralston is all but forgotten, a woman who once mingled with Virginia Woolf and Djuna Barnes, she’s been reduced to a footnote in biographies of her older, more famous lover, Willy Logan. The narrator becomes obsessed with finding a way to tell Ralston’s side of the story, spurred on by a series of coincidences that lead her first to an uncanny self-portrait by Ralston a potent reminder of a sinister, past event, and then to Ralston herself. A meeting that results in something inexplicable.
Tuttle’s narrative is incredibly restrained and brief but packed with striking images and details. I loved the way she mixed the real and the imagined – such as making Ralston one of the women writers briefly revived by publisher Virago in the 1980s. Obscure modernist women are central to Tuttle’s story which was partly inspired by the experiences of Laura Riding, the American poet whose career was eclipsed by her troubled relationship with Robert Graves; while Ralston’s nickname “Her” summons up H. D. (Hilda Doolittle) whose books actually did feature on Virago’s list – “Her” was the name she gave her alternative self in the autobiographical Hermione. The nature of the bond formed between Ralston and the narrator raises questions too about the links forged between writers and their readers, the complex forms of identification that loving a particular book can provoke. Like Jonathan Carroll or Shirley Jackson, Tuttle’s brand of weird fiction is probing and atmospheric, there’s no real closure here, instead Tuttle offers up an array of fascinating questions rounded off with a moving but enigmatic ending - that worked for me but may be too fragmentary or slippery for some.
Tuttle’s narrative is incredibly restrained and brief but packed with striking images and details. I loved the way she mixed the real and the imagined – such as making Ralston one of the women writers briefly revived by publisher Virago in the 1980s. Obscure modernist women are central to Tuttle’s story which was partly inspired by the experiences of Laura Riding, the American poet whose career was eclipsed by her troubled relationship with Robert Graves; while Ralston’s nickname “Her” summons up H. D. (Hilda Doolittle) whose books actually did feature on Virago’s list – “Her” was the name she gave her alternative self in the autobiographical Hermione. The nature of the bond formed between Ralston and the narrator raises questions too about the links forged between writers and their readers, the complex forms of identification that loving a particular book can provoke. Like Jonathan Carroll or Shirley Jackson, Tuttle’s brand of weird fiction is probing and atmospheric, there’s no real closure here, instead Tuttle offers up an array of fascinating questions rounded off with a moving but enigmatic ending - that worked for me but may be too fragmentary or slippery for some.
November 22, 2023
An utterly perfect novella for me. It’s so clever, all of it – the use of ekphrasis, the title, the nature of the painting, how they all play into each other – but absorbing and readable at the same time, never too smart for its own good. One of the closest things I have read to Nina Allan’s short fiction, somehow seeming to embody the spirit of her fractured novels: I’m thinking especially of Stardust/Ruby, of ‘Wreck of the Julia’, as well as ‘Four Abstracts’ and Maggots. Reminded me of Aliya Whiteley too: the mystery of
Skein Island
’s premise, the cyclical nature of Three Eight One. As a horror reader, a lover of strange stories, and someone who’s enjoyed Tuttle’s contributions to anthologies, it’s probably embarrassing that it’s taken an NYRB edition to turn me on to her work. Even worse, in the past I’ve been put off by the covers (the design for A Nest of Nightmares, for example, makes it look exactly like the type of horror I like least). My Death is a revelation: subtle, grounded, yet indisputably weird. I will certainly read more now. And I’ll read this again.
June 6, 2024
this book left me so speechless i read it twice in one week, which i think is some of the highest praise i could give a book. i enjoyed it just as much the second time around, too! i thought lisa tuttle’s writing style hit a sweet spot in between nice lit fic descriptions and this feeling of uncanny dread. i also loved the way she intertwined real literary figures with the lives of her fictional writers that are at the center of the story - she genuinely had me thinking this was a nonfiction book at certain points. honestly i’m disappointed that i can’t read the fictional book “in troy” by helen ralston, the writer who is the subject of this book. sounds like it would be right up my alley. if you enjoy books about art and writing with a weird twist, this is the book for you!
i recommend going into this one blind but i want to talk about certain things that really struck me within the novel so (maybe) spoilers ahead, depending on what you consider a spoiler (mostly me just rambling about things that might not make sense if you haven’t read the book yet). proceed with caution!
tuttle explores the way female artists/writers are overshadowed by the men they’re associated with, or by certain dramatic events that take place in their lives, to the point that their work is kept in obscurity. and if you’ve ever enjoyed the work of someone who is in this category, you might know what it’s like to connect so deeply with a piece of art or writing that you feel like it was created specifically for you - like you could’ve created it yourself. tuttle then flips that feeling on its head with her metaphysical sorcery that left me staring at page 100, mouth agape, for a solid 10 minutes, both times i read the book.
one of the reasons i chose to reread the book immediately after finishing it is because of all the serendipitous moments leading us to what happens on page 100: our narrator stumbling across the portrait of helen ralston in the gallery, the chance to get an exclusive look at helen’s painting “my death” immediately after deciding to write a biography about her, the other writer working on a book about helen graciously providing our narrator with helen’s contact information, helen having heard of the narrator and even loving her books… these wins for the narrator in her research process then morph into unsettling coincidences between lives of narrator and helen that are uncovered as the narrator interviews helen. the build up to the climax of the story was done so well and the narrator’s growing sense of confusion and dread as she learns more about helen’s life is palpable.
there’s also a thread running through the novel about sexuality in art that reminded me of certain parts of art monsters by lauren elkin. helen’s lover, willy, was literally blinded because of helen freely expressing her sexuality in the painting “my death” and we see the narrator also grappling with her feeling of disgust and shame upon initially seeing the painting. it just reminded me of a lot of the themes of art monsters, specifically carolee schneeman‘s point that women were usually the subjects of art, so women being makers of art was a challenge to the rules of the traditionally male-dominated art world. just really enjoyed that connection between my recent reads.
the fact that i have this much to say about a 105 page book really tells you all you need to know! crazy stuff for someone that usually can’t form a coherent thought about a book!
i recommend going into this one blind but i want to talk about certain things that really struck me within the novel so (maybe) spoilers ahead, depending on what you consider a spoiler (mostly me just rambling about things that might not make sense if you haven’t read the book yet). proceed with caution!
tuttle explores the way female artists/writers are overshadowed by the men they’re associated with, or by certain dramatic events that take place in their lives, to the point that their work is kept in obscurity. and if you’ve ever enjoyed the work of someone who is in this category, you might know what it’s like to connect so deeply with a piece of art or writing that you feel like it was created specifically for you - like you could’ve created it yourself. tuttle then flips that feeling on its head with her metaphysical sorcery that left me staring at page 100, mouth agape, for a solid 10 minutes, both times i read the book.
one of the reasons i chose to reread the book immediately after finishing it is because of all the serendipitous moments leading us to what happens on page 100: our narrator stumbling across the portrait of helen ralston in the gallery, the chance to get an exclusive look at helen’s painting “my death” immediately after deciding to write a biography about her, the other writer working on a book about helen graciously providing our narrator with helen’s contact information, helen having heard of the narrator and even loving her books… these wins for the narrator in her research process then morph into unsettling coincidences between lives of narrator and helen that are uncovered as the narrator interviews helen. the build up to the climax of the story was done so well and the narrator’s growing sense of confusion and dread as she learns more about helen’s life is palpable.
there’s also a thread running through the novel about sexuality in art that reminded me of certain parts of art monsters by lauren elkin. helen’s lover, willy, was literally blinded because of helen freely expressing her sexuality in the painting “my death” and we see the narrator also grappling with her feeling of disgust and shame upon initially seeing the painting. it just reminded me of a lot of the themes of art monsters, specifically carolee schneeman‘s point that women were usually the subjects of art, so women being makers of art was a challenge to the rules of the traditionally male-dominated art world. just really enjoyed that connection between my recent reads.
the fact that i have this much to say about a 105 page book really tells you all you need to know! crazy stuff for someone that usually can’t form a coherent thought about a book!
January 23, 2026
⭐️⭐️⭐️.75
This was such a disorientating, deliciously ambiguous and captivating read about a widow's infatuation with a novelist and the parallels that begin to ensure between her life, and the writers. My Death was a book that I had so much anticipation for and as much as there were moments that I felt so enthralled by the characters and where the book was headed, I wish to more core that this was longer!!! The novella structure truly does work amazingly with how disorientating the read becomes, however I would've preferred the characters to feel more flushed out... but perhaps that was the point. Adored the writing, will definitely be rereading, a great one to binge read!
This was such a disorientating, deliciously ambiguous and captivating read about a widow's infatuation with a novelist and the parallels that begin to ensure between her life, and the writers. My Death was a book that I had so much anticipation for and as much as there were moments that I felt so enthralled by the characters and where the book was headed, I wish to more core that this was longer!!! The novella structure truly does work amazingly with how disorientating the read becomes, however I would've preferred the characters to feel more flushed out... but perhaps that was the point. Adored the writing, will definitely be rereading, a great one to binge read!
May 13, 2024
This novella seemed underwhelming to me … until it wasn’t. I can’t say why it wasn’t, because that would give it all away.
I’m glad I remembered to read the introduction by Amy Gentry. It doesn’t give the story away, but it’s still best to read it afterward, to read the text without someone else’s thoughts in mind. Tuttle was unknown to me before I heard of this book, and the introduction helped me understand her, as well as spur me on to read more by her.
*
from the intro:
Tuttle’s heroines have forsaken [Shirley] Jackson’s domestic spaces to navigate the double and triple binds of post-second-wave womanhood, ping-ponging between satisfaction and regret, self-sufficiency and loneliness.
*
from the text:
… maybe her feelings and her actions then didn’t suit her older self-image.
I’m glad I remembered to read the introduction by Amy Gentry. It doesn’t give the story away, but it’s still best to read it afterward, to read the text without someone else’s thoughts in mind. Tuttle was unknown to me before I heard of this book, and the introduction helped me understand her, as well as spur me on to read more by her.
*
from the intro:
Tuttle’s heroines have forsaken [Shirley] Jackson’s domestic spaces to navigate the double and triple binds of post-second-wave womanhood, ping-ponging between satisfaction and regret, self-sufficiency and loneliness.
*
from the text:
… maybe her feelings and her actions then didn’t suit her older self-image.
January 4, 2024
If you enjoyed My Death, please check out the incredible author interview we did for the book launch with Lisa Tuttle and Kelly Link! Link to interview here.
UPDATE TO THE UPDATE: My Death is officially out from NYRB Classics today!!! I am really proud of my involvement with this project, which I hope will be a gateway drug for many to the amazing Lisa Tuttle. I adore all of Lisa's work, but this novella is particularly special--a modern-day classic of weird fiction, an uncanny feminist fable, and a folk horror gem all wrapped up in one gorgeous, eerie little package. It's Possession by way of M. R. James, perfect for October, but small enough to fit in a stocking. ;) Enjoy!
UPDATE: NYRB Classics is reissuing My Death, with a gorgeous cover!
So honored to be writing the introduction, and excited to see this work reach a new audience. <3
Everything I read by Lisa Tuttle makes me more and more impressed. This stunning novella deserves a reissue by Melville House or some other indie press, since novellas are all the rage; I don't think it's ever been printed in the US, and it's really ripe for rediscovery. It's a mature work, beautifully but simply written, developing themes about women as artists that have preoccupied her from the beginning of her career. Reads very much like one of Henry James's mid-late period ghost stories--all about the self that art makes, and the alternate lives one could have led--but with Tuttle's characteristic tenderness for the special qualities of women's experience. I just love this little book.
UPDATE TO THE UPDATE: My Death is officially out from NYRB Classics today!!! I am really proud of my involvement with this project, which I hope will be a gateway drug for many to the amazing Lisa Tuttle. I adore all of Lisa's work, but this novella is particularly special--a modern-day classic of weird fiction, an uncanny feminist fable, and a folk horror gem all wrapped up in one gorgeous, eerie little package. It's Possession by way of M. R. James, perfect for October, but small enough to fit in a stocking. ;) Enjoy!
UPDATE: NYRB Classics is reissuing My Death, with a gorgeous cover!
So honored to be writing the introduction, and excited to see this work reach a new audience. <3
Everything I read by Lisa Tuttle makes me more and more impressed. This stunning novella deserves a reissue by Melville House or some other indie press, since novellas are all the rage; I don't think it's ever been printed in the US, and it's really ripe for rediscovery. It's a mature work, beautifully but simply written, developing themes about women as artists that have preoccupied her from the beginning of her career. Reads very much like one of Henry James's mid-late period ghost stories--all about the self that art makes, and the alternate lives one could have led--but with Tuttle's characteristic tenderness for the special qualities of women's experience. I just love this little book.
June 1, 2025
‘Mi muerte’ es una novela que no me voy a cansar de recomendar. Su autora, Lisa Tuttle, nos regala en apenas 140 páginas una historia capaz de obsesionarte y, que, si hubiera querido, podría haber tenido 600 páginas, y cualquiera las hubiera leído encantado. ¿Qué pasa? Se agarra a aquello de lo bueno si breve, dos veces bueno y le sale de diez. Una prosa super evocadora donde cada palabra solo ha podido ser elegida con la precisión de un cirujano y que no es que se lea bien, es que te atrapa y te sumerge sin que te des cuenta en terrenos místicos y misteriosos. En los que puedes hundirte en diferentes capas simbólicas que te llevarán a distintas interpretaciones.
Una novela redonda que tiene todo lo que me interesa: historias a dos tiempos, reflexiones sobre arte y literatura, rol de la mujer como musa en la historia del arte, giros inesperados, una búsqueda, una obsesión, la diosa… y mucho más.
Bien, tenemos a una mujer, que desde que se ha quedado viuda, pues bueno, genial no está. Lo que quizá lleva peor de su tranquila existencia, es que no ha sido capaz de volver a escribir (ah, es escritora) pero una llamada de su editor, lo cambiará todo. La obliga a salir de su casita en el rural para comer con él en Edimburgo. Allí decide visitar librerías, ver una exposición… bueno, lo que es tener un día productivo ya que obligada vas a un sitio.
Por lo que parece casualidad, se reencontrará con el trabajo de una artista y escritora modernista, que la obsesionó en su juventud, Helen Ralson. La obra subversiva y radical de Helen, es recordada solo por unos cuántos, porque ha pasado a la historia solo su papel como satélite en la vida de alguien (sorpresa para nadie, un artista señor). Así, la protagonista decide escribir una biografía sobre ella. Comenzando desde el momento mismo en el que toma la decisión, un viaje en el que pronto le llevará a descubrir que Helen y su obra está mucho más cerca de ella de lo que podría imaginarse.
Una novela super original y un poco perturbadora, que logra confundirte e inquietarte, de esas que según la acabas es imposible no releer los capítulos iniciales para descubrir que, efectivamente, todo lo que tanto te ha sorprendido ha estado ahí desde el principio, pero no eras capaz de verlo. Eso sí, hay ir con mente abierta, todo puede pasar cuando te enfrentas a ‘Mi muerte’ (que por cierto es el título de la obra más controvertida de Ralson).
Una trama que fascinará a todos a quienes nos gusta un misterio que involucre el mundo del arte y los libros sobre libros, eso sin duda. Pero, sobre todo, lo que te queda después del libro es el enfado ante la anulación y borrado que se ha hecho de forma sistemática durante tanto tiempo del legado de las artistas mujeres, relegadas en el mejor de los casos al papel de musas (objetos artísticos), amantes y anécdotas en las biografías de otros. Así, la importancia del rescate de estas vidas y obras y de la creación de una narrativa propia de la propia existencia, para no dejar que otros digan todo lo que no eres, no vaya a ser que encima, te lo creas.
Una novela que se queda mucho tiempo haciendo ruido en tu cabeza. Y eso me encanta.
Una novela redonda que tiene todo lo que me interesa: historias a dos tiempos, reflexiones sobre arte y literatura, rol de la mujer como musa en la historia del arte, giros inesperados, una búsqueda, una obsesión, la diosa… y mucho más.
Bien, tenemos a una mujer, que desde que se ha quedado viuda, pues bueno, genial no está. Lo que quizá lleva peor de su tranquila existencia, es que no ha sido capaz de volver a escribir (ah, es escritora) pero una llamada de su editor, lo cambiará todo. La obliga a salir de su casita en el rural para comer con él en Edimburgo. Allí decide visitar librerías, ver una exposición… bueno, lo que es tener un día productivo ya que obligada vas a un sitio.
Por lo que parece casualidad, se reencontrará con el trabajo de una artista y escritora modernista, que la obsesionó en su juventud, Helen Ralson. La obra subversiva y radical de Helen, es recordada solo por unos cuántos, porque ha pasado a la historia solo su papel como satélite en la vida de alguien (sorpresa para nadie, un artista señor). Así, la protagonista decide escribir una biografía sobre ella. Comenzando desde el momento mismo en el que toma la decisión, un viaje en el que pronto le llevará a descubrir que Helen y su obra está mucho más cerca de ella de lo que podría imaginarse.
Una novela super original y un poco perturbadora, que logra confundirte e inquietarte, de esas que según la acabas es imposible no releer los capítulos iniciales para descubrir que, efectivamente, todo lo que tanto te ha sorprendido ha estado ahí desde el principio, pero no eras capaz de verlo. Eso sí, hay ir con mente abierta, todo puede pasar cuando te enfrentas a ‘Mi muerte’ (que por cierto es el título de la obra más controvertida de Ralson).
Una trama que fascinará a todos a quienes nos gusta un misterio que involucre el mundo del arte y los libros sobre libros, eso sin duda. Pero, sobre todo, lo que te queda después del libro es el enfado ante la anulación y borrado que se ha hecho de forma sistemática durante tanto tiempo del legado de las artistas mujeres, relegadas en el mejor de los casos al papel de musas (objetos artísticos), amantes y anécdotas en las biografías de otros. Así, la importancia del rescate de estas vidas y obras y de la creación de una narrativa propia de la propia existencia, para no dejar que otros digan todo lo que no eres, no vaya a ser que encima, te lo creas.
Una novela que se queda mucho tiempo haciendo ruido en tu cabeza. Y eso me encanta.
March 9, 2025
Meta, weird, and so engaging in the best way. Women writers, female modernists, and the search for selfhood…. Much to consider
December 25, 2024
More like a 3.75, this novella has some interesting commentary about the subsumation of the woman as an individual when she becomes identified as a "muse" and, in turn, how this experience of one particular woman can reflect the experience of all women to some degree. The writing is beautiful, but there were times when I was a little bored and I honestly wanted more. I could still see this being a reread some day.
January 5, 2024
To be discussed in the Literary Horror January 2024 monthly read:
https://www.goodreads.com/topic/show/...
https://www.goodreads.com/topic/show/...
October 28, 2024
La escritora que no sabe que escribir
Desde la prematura muerte de su marido, la narradora anónima de la historia no ha podido trabajar ni escribir. Reside, instalada en una casa de la costa oeste de Escocia, pasando sus días sin hacer especialmente nada. Sin embargo, su agente la urge a que continúe escribiendo. Para ello, concierta una cita con ella en Edimburgo, tanto para ayudarle a revivir su carrera profesional en decadencia como para charlar con ella sobre su próximo libro. No obstante, nuestra narradora no tiene nada, aunque le asegura que si por teléfono. Paseando por la National Gallery, un encuentro casual con una de sus pinturas favoritas (Circe, de W.E. Logan), recibe lo que podría ser una milagrosa respuesta: escribirá la biografía de Helen Ralston, la conocida protagonista del cuadro y la inspiración para un clásico libro infantil de W.E. Logan. Así, nuestra narradora comienza a trabajar en la biografía con una obsesión (casi) enfermiza, y en los meses siguientes, donde puede conversar con la propia Ralston, descubre extrañas resonancias entre la historia de la mujer mayor y la suya propia.
Perdidos en nuestra madriguera de conejo
Concebido como mitad diario de viaje, mitad exploración de las divagaciones filosóficas y reflexiones de la protagonista, My Death se construye como una novela de misterio digna de una película de A24. Mientras que en las primeras páginas Lisa Tuttle parece contarnos un acogedor relato de investigación literaria, la narradora anónima, que son los hombros en los que avanzamos sentados dentro de la historia, comienza a convertir el relato en algo mucho más espeluznante y siniestro desde que consigue conocer a la protagonista de su libro, Helen Elizabeth Ralston. Es a medida que la narradora pasa más tiempo con Ralston y en su casa que la sensación de inquietud aumenta para el lector. My Death parece estar siempre moviéndose, aunque pasan unas cuantas páginas para que sepamos hacia dónde se dirige, donde unas ruedas invisibles en la historia nos indican que el pasado y el presente están más relacionados de lo que parece.
El papel de la mujer, duelo y arte
Con el ritmo tenso que caracteriza a My Death, resaltado por la brevedad del relato y por que los acontecimientos tenga lugar entre mentes y recuerdos, Lisa Tuttle nos relata una metáfora del proceso del duelo a la vez que examina el proceso de escribir una biografía, como exploración de los obstáculos de ser una artista femenina, sea el momento que sea. Sin embargo, el elemento que más me fascina dentro de My Death es el análisis que hace de la capacidad humana para insertar, como si fuera parte de nuestro propio ADN y relato personal, lo que aprendemos de otros. ¿Puede una investigación obsesiva cambiarnos hasta tal punto de no saber quién somos? Lisa sondea, en cierto sentido, cómo los pensamientos e ideas de los demás, aquellos que leemos e idealizamos en nuestra existencia, se filtran por nuestros canales mentales de una manera tan permanente que nuestra identidad puede llegar a diluirse en una mezcolanza que no sabemos distinguir (del todo).
¿Somos un yo completamente distinto, ahora infectado por los pensamientos de (los) otro(s), cuando nos vemos sometidos a este influjo? Bajo la atenta mirada del duelo como eje principal y con el arte de las mujeres sutilmente resaltado —A. S. Byat o Virginia Woolf hacen una breve aparición— My Death también se centra en la idea del redescubrimiento y el renacimiento, tanto como de la propia persona tras el trauma como de una artista perdida en el limbo. My Death no es una novela corta que cambie la vida a nadie (o eso creo), ni que explote especialmente el cerebro con su lectura, pero su estructura abisal en bucle, finita e infinita a la vez, hace de su narrativa una historia disfrutable, memorable y exploratoria en parte, y de esas que te dejan, si cabe el caso, con alguna que otra pregunta rondando en la cabeza.
Publica en español Muñeca Infinita en febrero de 2025 :)
Link a la reseña completa: https://boywithletters.blogspot.com/2...
Desde la prematura muerte de su marido, la narradora anónima de la historia no ha podido trabajar ni escribir. Reside, instalada en una casa de la costa oeste de Escocia, pasando sus días sin hacer especialmente nada. Sin embargo, su agente la urge a que continúe escribiendo. Para ello, concierta una cita con ella en Edimburgo, tanto para ayudarle a revivir su carrera profesional en decadencia como para charlar con ella sobre su próximo libro. No obstante, nuestra narradora no tiene nada, aunque le asegura que si por teléfono. Paseando por la National Gallery, un encuentro casual con una de sus pinturas favoritas (Circe, de W.E. Logan), recibe lo que podría ser una milagrosa respuesta: escribirá la biografía de Helen Ralston, la conocida protagonista del cuadro y la inspiración para un clásico libro infantil de W.E. Logan. Así, nuestra narradora comienza a trabajar en la biografía con una obsesión (casi) enfermiza, y en los meses siguientes, donde puede conversar con la propia Ralston, descubre extrañas resonancias entre la historia de la mujer mayor y la suya propia.
Perdidos en nuestra madriguera de conejo
Concebido como mitad diario de viaje, mitad exploración de las divagaciones filosóficas y reflexiones de la protagonista, My Death se construye como una novela de misterio digna de una película de A24. Mientras que en las primeras páginas Lisa Tuttle parece contarnos un acogedor relato de investigación literaria, la narradora anónima, que son los hombros en los que avanzamos sentados dentro de la historia, comienza a convertir el relato en algo mucho más espeluznante y siniestro desde que consigue conocer a la protagonista de su libro, Helen Elizabeth Ralston. Es a medida que la narradora pasa más tiempo con Ralston y en su casa que la sensación de inquietud aumenta para el lector. My Death parece estar siempre moviéndose, aunque pasan unas cuantas páginas para que sepamos hacia dónde se dirige, donde unas ruedas invisibles en la historia nos indican que el pasado y el presente están más relacionados de lo que parece.
El papel de la mujer, duelo y arte
Con el ritmo tenso que caracteriza a My Death, resaltado por la brevedad del relato y por que los acontecimientos tenga lugar entre mentes y recuerdos, Lisa Tuttle nos relata una metáfora del proceso del duelo a la vez que examina el proceso de escribir una biografía, como exploración de los obstáculos de ser una artista femenina, sea el momento que sea. Sin embargo, el elemento que más me fascina dentro de My Death es el análisis que hace de la capacidad humana para insertar, como si fuera parte de nuestro propio ADN y relato personal, lo que aprendemos de otros. ¿Puede una investigación obsesiva cambiarnos hasta tal punto de no saber quién somos? Lisa sondea, en cierto sentido, cómo los pensamientos e ideas de los demás, aquellos que leemos e idealizamos en nuestra existencia, se filtran por nuestros canales mentales de una manera tan permanente que nuestra identidad puede llegar a diluirse en una mezcolanza que no sabemos distinguir (del todo).
¿Somos un yo completamente distinto, ahora infectado por los pensamientos de (los) otro(s), cuando nos vemos sometidos a este influjo? Bajo la atenta mirada del duelo como eje principal y con el arte de las mujeres sutilmente resaltado —A. S. Byat o Virginia Woolf hacen una breve aparición— My Death también se centra en la idea del redescubrimiento y el renacimiento, tanto como de la propia persona tras el trauma como de una artista perdida en el limbo. My Death no es una novela corta que cambie la vida a nadie (o eso creo), ni que explote especialmente el cerebro con su lectura, pero su estructura abisal en bucle, finita e infinita a la vez, hace de su narrativa una historia disfrutable, memorable y exploratoria en parte, y de esas que te dejan, si cabe el caso, con alguna que otra pregunta rondando en la cabeza.
Publica en español Muñeca Infinita en febrero de 2025 :)
Link a la reseña completa: https://boywithletters.blogspot.com/2...
November 3, 2025
[3.5 stars] I get why this is shelved under horror, but it misaligned my expectations of the book versus what it's actually about. A quietly weird novella about the power dynamics between an artist and their muse, and how history is packaged and retold. The final quarter is disorienting and blurs the margins between fact and fiction, artist and muse, subject and author. Everything deliberately remains just out of reach.
I re-read the final few pages to try and make sense of it, and I still don't fully grasp the ending. One could argue that the entire book hinges on the subjugation of selfhood, but who is the self in question? The equivalence —or lack thereof — between erasure and self-erasure is also central to the narrative and ends up making everything intensely meta.
To say I'm confused is an understatement, but I liked my time with this. I think it's the type of book that I appreciated more than enjoyed, but I'd still recommend it.
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reading this as an excuse to use the word ekphrasis in my forthcoming review because i like that word
I re-read the final few pages to try and make sense of it, and I still don't fully grasp the ending. One could argue that the entire book hinges on the subjugation of selfhood, but who is the self in question? The equivalence —or lack thereof — between erasure and self-erasure is also central to the narrative and ends up making everything intensely meta.
To say I'm confused is an understatement, but I liked my time with this. I think it's the type of book that I appreciated more than enjoyed, but I'd still recommend it.
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reading this as an excuse to use the word ekphrasis in my forthcoming review because i like that word
December 7, 2023
I LOVED this.
The story is immediately interesting and immediately captivates you, and then the unsettling feeling starts to slowly creep up on you. The pacing, the writing, the storyline…everything was perfect.
The story is immediately interesting and immediately captivates you, and then the unsettling feeling starts to slowly creep up on you. The pacing, the writing, the storyline…everything was perfect.
January 20, 2024
Update. I bumped this one up a star because the Literary Horror group discussion forced me to look at the book closer and I think there's some very subtle and interesting stuff going on under the hood of this book.
Discussed here: https://www.goodreads.com/topic/show/...
Discussed here: https://www.goodreads.com/topic/show/...
November 3, 2025
This has a lovely epigraph by Robert Graves: "...a typical death island where the familiar Death-goddess sings as she spins."
That was my favourite part.
Otherwise, it's a "creepy" 100 page novella which is:
-60% "writer has lunch with her agent",
-20% writer waxes eloquent about art and culture, thoroughly ruining a famous painting of Circe for me in the process,
-5% creepy doll, but without developing either the creepy or the doll
-5% humblebragging about how your fictional character met Virigina Woolf once, and
-10% erm, what?!
That was my favourite part.
Otherwise, it's a "creepy" 100 page novella which is:
-60% "writer has lunch with her agent",
-20% writer waxes eloquent about art and culture, thoroughly ruining a famous painting of Circe for me in the process,
-5% creepy doll, but without developing either the creepy or the doll
-5% humblebragging about how your fictional character met Virigina Woolf once, and
-10% erm, what?!
May 9, 2025
بعضی کتابها زیر صد صفحه کاری رو که باید میکنن.
November 17, 2023
A female ex-patriate author, writing in the voice of a female ex-patriate author, who wants to write about a female ex-patriate author. Write what you know, eh?
This was more the child is father to the man, though (please forgive the gender in that saying), than some nesting doll. That's admittedly vague, so let me be clearer: the author is writing about herself, but in a fractured way. She invents someone, maybe herself, to examine someone's life, maybe hers. Will they merge?
Other reviewers and even the nyrb Introduction, suggest this is a work of feminism, and that may be so. I saw it, rather, as a work of self-reflection.
Whatever. There is great storytelling here. A scene that will stay with me is a scene where the protagonist and her agent spend an afternoon in the apartment of an art collector. I love a slow reveal.
This is a book, ultimately, where everyone is made-up, except no one is.
This was more the child is father to the man, though (please forgive the gender in that saying), than some nesting doll. That's admittedly vague, so let me be clearer: the author is writing about herself, but in a fractured way. She invents someone, maybe herself, to examine someone's life, maybe hers. Will they merge?
Other reviewers and even the nyrb Introduction, suggest this is a work of feminism, and that may be so. I saw it, rather, as a work of self-reflection.
Whatever. There is great storytelling here. A scene that will stay with me is a scene where the protagonist and her agent spend an afternoon in the apartment of an art collector. I love a slow reveal.
This is a book, ultimately, where everyone is made-up, except no one is.
Read
January 31, 2024New favorite niche subgenre confirmed: metaphysical literary investigations with a twinge of horror. Read this if you, like me, loved Death in Her Hands by Ottessa Moshfegh. Or, 2666 by Roberto Bolaño (specifically Part 1!). A single-sitting banger that demands a reread!
October 17, 2025
This novella follows a writer’s quiet obsession with an artist-writer.
What unfolds is a slow paced exploration of artistic legacy and personal curiosity. While the premise holds some intrigue, the execution can feel tedious.
The narrative lacks momentum, making it a bit dull overall. However, if you're drawn to art and the contemplative world around it, you may find something worthwhile here.
What unfolds is a slow paced exploration of artistic legacy and personal curiosity. While the premise holds some intrigue, the execution can feel tedious.
The narrative lacks momentum, making it a bit dull overall. However, if you're drawn to art and the contemplative world around it, you may find something worthwhile here.
November 15, 2025
با ترجمه و ویراست خوب نشر بیدگل خواندم
Read
April 11, 2025Lisa Tuttle invented ghost stories
November 22, 2025
short and weird. Exactly what I needed
My Death is a book that I promise you can read in one sitting! It's interesting and immediately captivating. It's a mix of realism and fantasy and honestly felt like a fever dream at times. It's atmospheric, suspenseful, unsettling and weird. It's all so very subtle but it builds and builds and slowly creeps in and by the end your left with chills!
this story follows our narrator who's is writing a biography of a female artist Elizabeth Raltson. But whilst doing researching of her and meeting her in person, she soon discovers the parallels their lives share. Is it coincidence? Or is there something more sinister at play?
My Death is a book that I promise you can read in one sitting! It's interesting and immediately captivating. It's a mix of realism and fantasy and honestly felt like a fever dream at times. It's atmospheric, suspenseful, unsettling and weird. It's all so very subtle but it builds and builds and slowly creeps in and by the end your left with chills!
this story follows our narrator who's is writing a biography of a female artist Elizabeth Raltson. But whilst doing researching of her and meeting her in person, she soon discovers the parallels their lives share. Is it coincidence? Or is there something more sinister at play?
August 15, 2025
While not a conventional horror story, “My Death” is uncanny and chilling and supernatural. The plot involves a middle-aged woman who finds herself alone after the death of her husband and at sea in her writing career.
In a museum the unnamed narrator stumbles upon a painting of the mythical Circe by W.E. Logan, with his lover and muse Helen Elizabeth Ralston as its model. Ralston has a brief but fateful affair with the married Logan, and after a short career as a painter, becomes a writer. The narrator, an admirer of Ralston’s books, is struck by the idea of writing her biography. Ralston is still alive and indeed not far away.
As she embarks on the biography, the narrator comes into possession of a small landscape painting by Ralston titled “My Death,” which contains a hidden image. She decides to deliver “My Death” to Ralston.
The book deals with being alone and isolated, something the narrator first realizes as a child after telling her mother a nightmare that terrified her but which the mother says is “not scary.” And the book is also about the deep connections and affinities we share with other people, some of whom, it turns out, .
In a museum the unnamed narrator stumbles upon a painting of the mythical Circe by W.E. Logan, with his lover and muse Helen Elizabeth Ralston as its model. Ralston has a brief but fateful affair with the married Logan, and after a short career as a painter, becomes a writer. The narrator, an admirer of Ralston’s books, is struck by the idea of writing her biography. Ralston is still alive and indeed not far away.
As she embarks on the biography, the narrator comes into possession of a small landscape painting by Ralston titled “My Death,” which contains a hidden image. She decides to deliver “My Death” to Ralston.
The book deals with being alone and isolated, something the narrator first realizes as a child after telling her mother a nightmare that terrified her but which the mother says is “not scary.” And the book is also about the deep connections and affinities we share with other people, some of whom, it turns out, .
October 15, 2023
Spooky October #1
I chose this book by the cover alone. I'm sometimes superficial like that. Luckily it has paid off. It's understated, subtle, psychologically complex, ambiguous, and faintly sinister, as the narrator writes about a Helen Ralston's novel. Who the narrator is at that point is revealed at the very end and it's quite a reversal. Loved it. I also loved that it is indeed understated and complex dealing mostly with the place of women in literature and art. I'm not sure I'll keep it up with more literary horror/weird until the end of the season, but My Death was a very good beginning.
I chose this book by the cover alone. I'm sometimes superficial like that. Luckily it has paid off. It's understated, subtle, psychologically complex, ambiguous, and faintly sinister, as the narrator writes about a Helen Ralston's novel. Who the narrator is at that point is revealed at the very end and it's quite a reversal. Loved it. I also loved that it is indeed understated and complex dealing mostly with the place of women in literature and art. I'm not sure I'll keep it up with more literary horror/weird until the end of the season, but My Death was a very good beginning.
October 24, 2023
Maybe an exercise in decompartmentalization of the self on Tuttle' part, an exploration of obsession and disharmony within ones own creativity, of communing with the demonic muse.
This was billed to my by a friend as Zulawski's POSSESSION by way of Henry James and yeah, I can see where they where coming from, but what jumped out to me more so than anything else was Tuttle' profound grasp on the uncanny, and of literary dread.
This was billed to my by a friend as Zulawski's POSSESSION by way of Henry James and yeah, I can see where they where coming from, but what jumped out to me more so than anything else was Tuttle' profound grasp on the uncanny, and of literary dread.
June 21, 2024
An unnamed narrator, a writer crippled by grief, finds herself in a remote Scottish cottage, her creativity stalled. A nudge from her agent and the need for money lead her to Edinburgh, a new project her only escape. A chance encounter at the National Gallery sparks a flicker of inspiration. A captivating painting of Circe by a forgotten artist, W.E. Logan, reignites a connection to Helen Elizabeth Ralston, a writer who profoundly influenced the narrator's own work.
The enigmatic Ralston, the model for Logan's Circe, becomes the subject of a proposed biography. The narrator seeks to unravel Ralston's passionate affair with Logan and the secrets of her long, hidden career. "My Death" is a tightly wound exploration of the mysterious pull certain authors have on us, the personal compasses that guide our literary choices, and how we find the strength to create again in the face of loss.
Beyond the biography lies a deeper truth. "My Death" is ultimately a story of resilience. Art, the book suggests, acts as a powerful salve, a way to find renewal after devastation. Writers, too, find a kind of immortality through the connection they forge with their readers. Woven throughout the narrative is the intrigue surrounding Achlan, a remote Scottish island and a significant pagan burial ground. A watercolor by Ralston, titled "My Death," reveals a surprising link to Gustave Courbet’s controversial masterpiece “The Origin of the World”.
With its unexpected turns and a cast of captivating women often ignored by the art world, "My Death" is a genre-bending novella. It's a potent mix of fact, fiction, identity, feminism, psychology, art history, and a touch of the otherworldly. Don't miss it.
The enigmatic Ralston, the model for Logan's Circe, becomes the subject of a proposed biography. The narrator seeks to unravel Ralston's passionate affair with Logan and the secrets of her long, hidden career. "My Death" is a tightly wound exploration of the mysterious pull certain authors have on us, the personal compasses that guide our literary choices, and how we find the strength to create again in the face of loss.
Beyond the biography lies a deeper truth. "My Death" is ultimately a story of resilience. Art, the book suggests, acts as a powerful salve, a way to find renewal after devastation. Writers, too, find a kind of immortality through the connection they forge with their readers. Woven throughout the narrative is the intrigue surrounding Achlan, a remote Scottish island and a significant pagan burial ground. A watercolor by Ralston, titled "My Death," reveals a surprising link to Gustave Courbet’s controversial masterpiece “The Origin of the World”.
With its unexpected turns and a cast of captivating women often ignored by the art world, "My Death" is a genre-bending novella. It's a potent mix of fact, fiction, identity, feminism, psychology, art history, and a touch of the otherworldly. Don't miss it.
July 27, 2018
It was by complete accident that this book was building upon similar themes as "Palmerino", but now comparison is inevitable: and "My Death" is just much better. It has characters that are complete and feel like real people, it attempts at honest biography but keeps the shroud of mystery and doesn't rob the subject of her voice, it analyzes feminism with a sharper eye; and the supernatural is subtle yet convincing. A beautiful, chilling read. I hope it's reprinted, given the current novella hype, because it certainly deserves more attention.
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