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She’s Not Your Enemy – Includes Ten-Session Video Series: Conquering Our Insecurities So We Can Build God’s Kingdom Together

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Find freedom from jealousy and insecurity as you rest in your true worth and identity in God. Complete with reflection questions, journaling space, and accompanying teaching videos, She’s Not Your Enemy helps you move beyond habits of self-protection and create a culture of community.
 
Sometimes the women in our lives feel like The colleague who threatens your position at work. The friend who talks behind your back. The woman who seems to have it all together—while you are barely hanging on.
 
But the real enemy is the one who is trying to defeat you with lies that lead to isolation, insecurity, and division. She’s Not Your Enemy equips us to battle Satan’s deception through the solid truth of God’s Word. Popular blogger and podcast host Jenn Schultz comes alongside us to
   
When we find our worth and identity in God, we can cultivate empathy and compassion for those we have labeled as the enemy—including the woman in the mirror—and live with greater joy.
 
Presented by Esther Books for Courageous Women
 

240 pages, Paperback

Published September 5, 2023

14 people are currently reading
97 people want to read

About the author

Jenn Schultz

3 books5 followers

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5 stars
48 (51%)
4 stars
25 (26%)
3 stars
14 (14%)
2 stars
7 (7%)
1 star
0 (0%)
Displaying 1 - 30 of 33 reviews
Profile Image for Laura Robinson (naptimereaders).
342 reviews282 followers
October 16, 2023
4.5!

Really loved this little book & think it would be so helpful for women who struggle with comparison or anything of the sort when it comes to other women!

Each chapter ended with reflection questions!

This would also be a great book study to do with other women! There’s a lot of scripture throughout!

Docked a .5 star because I don’t care for the use of the passion translation/ the message translation. And didn’t love the mention of Amy Poehler memoir (this is not a woman I would include in a Christian book) saying there is so much wisdom in her book.

Other than that, it’s a book I’d recommend to ladies who need some direction/ wisdom on this topic!
Profile Image for Madelyn.
215 reviews8 followers
December 8, 2024
A must-read for all women! So thankful to have done this study with friends over the past few months!

Each chapter packed a punch in the best way. I also loved the questions and journal prompts the chapters as well.
Profile Image for Jenn.
3 reviews
September 8, 2023
What a book. Jenn’s words or rather God's words through Jenn spoke to me on a deep and profound level in ‘She’s Not Your Enemy.” I will admit I didn’t read the book in order as I was too scared to read Chapter 2 “The Woman Who Has What You Want.” After years of infertility, I knew this would stir my heart. However, the amount of encouragement and peace this chapter brought me was worth the tears I cried relating all too well to the words Jenn wrote. No matter your age, life situation, or where you are in your walk with God I know you will find peace, comfort, and joy in this book.

I love the real-life takeaways and action items at the end of each chapter. The real-life suggestions on how to work through what is holding you back are so practical and encouraging.

One of my favorite quotes from chapter 2 - “Just as grief isn’t one time only, surrender is ongoing, a practice of constantly working out the pain with him to find faith and hope through it all.”
Profile Image for Emma Kramer.
130 reviews
February 14, 2024
Short book filled with lots of encouraging truth! The author was really relatable and read well (listened via audiobook). The book is more or less a study, with questions at the end of each chapter. My only regret is not listening to it while I was doing less, so I could reflect and journal with it more. Here’s some of my favorite quotes from the book:

“It is poor theology to reduce God to a human level, saying he plays favorites, is good to some but not others and is weighing everything on a big balance to see if we are worthy of blessings.”

“You might have to trust that what is good for her, is not good for you”

We’ve all been told “Just go to God, just pray about it, just have faith” but these can elicit painful feelings. The assumption comes across that if you were just a little more faithful, then the blessing would come through.

“Everything you wish you could have had, everything thing that fell short in that core of relationships (parent and child), can be found in God’s patient, constant, faithful love for you”
Isaiah 49:15-16

“When others are in pain, it is not our time to fix, or adjust, but to hear, to be with, to feel with, to sit in the struggle with”

“God is not frustrated with your shortcomings, or weighing your worth or lovability on a scale. There is no tally system”

“Its not about what you’re producing for God, but what he’s producing in you”

“We take items out of the garbage can, and dress ourselves in them, becoming identified by the debris. We are highly prizing the wrong things. No wonder we feel needless competition with others and feel we can’t accomplish what we want to on this earth”

“Nothing much should be our posture, not our identity”
Profile Image for Mandi Navarre Eschenbach.
52 reviews2 followers
September 2, 2024
There are memories in my head from childhood and even into adulthood where I have felt the sting of rejection. But to be completely honest, there are also memories where I have rejected others.

Jenn helped me identify who the real enemy is (Satan, of course) and how he can feed into feelings of insecurity and inadequacy, which can lead to isolation, depression and anxiety.

She encouraged me to take steps of maturity. Comparison is something we do naturally, learning how we fit together like a puzzle. By building up the Kingdom of God, everyone has a part to play. For example, I want to be a woman who helps others feel safe, welcome and invited.

Jenn uses scripture throughout the book to guide us in breaking unhealthy thinking, as well as, practical tools to defeat things like inadequacy, competition, imposter syndrome, bitterness and jealousy.

I loved the chapter on compassion. She teaches us what compassion truly is and how Jesus is described over and over as compassionate, to suffer with. She gives us practical tools and suggestions on how we can suffer with others.

This interactive book, with 10 sessions of video teaching included, is easy to follow along with. I preferred this as a study for myself. It allowed me to not rush but to really process it all. Along with each chapter, Jenn provides great questions to think on, write out and apply to what you are learning and reflective prayer time.
Profile Image for Layn.
33 reviews4 followers
July 25, 2023
In “She’s Not Your Enemy”, author Jenn Schultz encourages women to disengage with the war of comparison by identifying the true enemy (satan), and how to combat his attacks with the truth of God’s word. With thought provoking questions and reflections at the end of each chapter, Jenn guides readers on how to make this a personal journey.

“She’s Not Your Enemy” is heartfelt, honest, compassionate, and encouraging. Jenn Schultz writes in a way that makes reading feel like you’re sitting down with a caring friend. Her words are seeped in wisdom and her heart for this subject is clear. Additionally, she quotes scripture on nearly every single page, directing readers back to the One behind it all.

I can’t even begin to count the amount of times I thought to myself, “that’s me” while reading this book. Page after page, it was like I could hear Jenn saying “I see you, but God sees you even better.” This was a message I desperately needed and I know many of my sisters out there do too. As I read, I couldn’t stop thinking of the different women in my life who I long to share this book with.

“She’s Not Your Enemy” is a standout resource on the comparison issue, one that I’m confident I will revisit time and time again.

My most heartfelt thanks to David C. Cook for sending me an eARC of this book in exchange for my honest review.
Profile Image for Shonda Ramsey.
6 reviews
September 5, 2023
In She's Not Your Enemy, Jenn has delicately and confidently shared with us all, her life journey and the many ups and downs that comes with comparison, insecurities, and feeling like you aren't enough, while equipping us to stand strong on our own two feet.

The chapter that really captured my heart was when she shared with us her infertility struggle and how she felt in those moments and how she overcame those moments. My own infertility and child loss journey came to surface and as I read on, I realized that I wasn't alone, there are others who also struggle with the feeling of unworthiness and brokenness.

I didn't realize until reading She's Not Your Enemy that sometimes the enemy I think is before me is actually...me, and my own faith struggles. Reading She's Not Your Enemy has given me a new outlook on life, and for the first time, I extended grace to myself. She isn't my enemy, she isn't the one causing this inner battle and turmoil, but most importantly, God is still here, right beside us, gently guiding us back to Him and away from the real enemy.

If you are someone, like me, who feels like all hope is lost, like you'll never be able to achieve what others do, I encourage you to pick up this book and give it a chance. Hope is never lost, sometimes we have to recognize who the enemy is so we can conquer the giant before us and live confidently.
Profile Image for Aubrey Dew.
112 reviews2 followers
December 20, 2023

She’s Not Your Enemy by Jenn Schultz has been on my tbr this year and I was very excited to see that it was offered to listen to for free on Spotify Audiobooks! I have dealt with friendship struggles, loneliness, and exclusion as early as kindergarten age, which has led to a fear of making friends. My view of female friendship often comes with a lot of fearfulness, and I tend to isolate myself rather than invest in what could be good.

I think this book was more about how to be a better friend rather than how to actually make godly friends, but that’s okay. I appreciate the different types of women and situations she talks about, and although I do not have friends who are currently getting married, having kids, or dealing with infertility, I think a lot of the same concepts that she applied could still be useful for me now. I also appreciated how she talked about how we must examine ourselves with Scripture, instead of giving ourselves brutal evaluations based on our own terms.

There were videos that went along with the book but I did not watch them and the actual book comes with space to journal after each chapter, but since this was an audiobook, I did not use that either.

The Message Translation was used in this and I strongly disliked that.

This would be a good book to read as a book study for high school/college girl groups.
4 reviews1 follower
September 15, 2023
You'll love this book. Not only is #ShesNotYourEnemy by @jennschultzauthor stunning, it's also helpful and smart.

The attention to detail in the book's organization is 🔥🔥🔥. Each chapter focuses on a woman who may feel like your enemy, like The Woman Who Doesn't Include You, The Woman Who Has It All Together, and The Woman in the Mirror and includes journal prompts, thoughtful discussion questions, a teaching video, and room for notes and prayers.

It would be a perfect book for a mom's group, Bible study, or a book club.

I think you'll especially like Jenn, though. Her voice is kind, compassionate, humble, even funny. She guides you through hurt feelings, tough truths, and found freedom without even a hint of judgment. You'll really love it and find the version of you that you were meant to be by book's end.
Profile Image for Katie Scott.
8 reviews2 followers
September 10, 2023
Jenn’s topic is so timely for women today. It seems like between in person connections and social media women have a constant measuring stick in front of them saying they don’t measure up. Jenn peels back all the layers and starts each chapter by rooting women into the love, character and sovereignty of God. She gives real life examples and current research on psychology and well being to help take steps forward in overcoming insecurity as Christ followers. Loved her videos as well as the extra journaling and reflection spaces she provided. Great to read on your own or go through with a group!
Profile Image for Nicole.
Author 1 book17 followers
August 30, 2023
I've struggled with comparison for as long as I can remember. I've often thought "She's a better wife, mom, career person, or homemaker than me." It's prevented me from being vulnerable, even in close friendships. I know it's an issue, but until I read "She's Not Your Enemy" by Jenn Schultz, I never knew what the real problem was. Jenn does a fantastic job clarifying who the real enemy is and gently equips us with tools to conquer our deepest insecurities. This will be a book I return to over and over!
1 review
September 1, 2023
She's Not Your Enemy is a much needed lesson for women in today's comparison culture. Jenn eloquently and vulnerably shares about different types of women that we're tempted to compare ourselves with and points us back to our true source of worth - God. Her writing is heartfelt and funny in all the right places, and her personal stories are oh so relatable. I especially loved the journaling pages at the end of each chapter to reflect on my own experiences and jot down things to pray about. This is a must read for anyone struggling with insecurity and comparison (isn't that everyone??!).
Profile Image for Lindsey.
182 reviews1 follower
September 4, 2023
She’s Not Your Enemy, is an eye opening guide full of Biblical wisdom on how to disengage with the comparison trap, women in particular fall into. Learning to identify the true enemy (Satan), and how to combat his attacks with the truth of God’s word, Jenn guides readers on how to conquer one’s deepest insecurities.

Every single reader of She’s Not Your Enemy will find themselves represented within the pages and stories shared by Jenn. Readers will walk away feeling seen, not only be Jenn but by God!
Profile Image for Lauren Bogear snider.
4 reviews
September 19, 2023
We all have experienced comparison and competition, often to the point of doing so in unhealthy ways. Jenn Shultz uses Scripture and correct theology to help us fight unhealthy comparison and competition. Because these struggles are so universal and easy to slip into, this message is so needed! Through the book/workbook style, she not only teaches about this topic and points us to the truth of Scripture and who God is, but she helps us navigate how to practically take steps forward in conquering unhealthy comparison. Grateful for this book!
1 review
August 29, 2023
This book has been such an encouragement to me! As I read through the pages, I am reminded of my identity in Christ. Because of this reminder of who I am in Christ, I am able to be free of comparison, jealousy, and envy. It is so freeing when you understand That a win for someone else does not mean a loss for you. God doesn’t withhold good from us. If you are like me in anyway, and you struggle with insecurity and comparing yourself to other people, this is the perfect book for you!
1 review
August 29, 2023
Wow! Jenn really hit the nail on the head with this book. We so often undermine our relationships with other women with jealousy, competition, pettiness, and listening to lies. Jenn explains who the real enemy is, and how we're not becoming the strong women of God because of this. The area for journaling at the end of each chapter helps to make it personal. I can't wait to share this with some of my closest relationships, and see our friendship grow. A must-read for women of all ages.
Profile Image for Lexi Norell.
4 reviews1 follower
August 30, 2023
Jen has such an authentic and humble way of communicating such a deep and important message! Through her vulnerability, humor, and biblical insight she teaches us about our own Christ centered identity and reminds us that we are not in competition with one another. If you are struggling with comparison, wondering if there is space for you at the table, or if your light can shine with others, this book is for you! So thankful for Jen’s voice in this space.
5 reviews
August 31, 2023
This book is such a breath of fresh air. I laughed, cried and truly exhaled as I could see myself in the pages of this book. I found myself getting comfortable being vulnerable which I haven’t been able to do in a long time. This book is one that I’m going to re-read and highlight several times. The words and the tools have already made me a better person, a better mother, a better wife and a better friend. So grateful for these words!
1 review
September 8, 2023
Jenn Schultz has written a book that can only be described as necessary! As women we are taught that we find our value in our looks, our accomplishments, our inclusion, and especially in how we compare to women we see around us. Jenn vulnerably but powerfully brings the reader back to the true and only source of worth - our value to God. This book is relevant, and it’s message of gaining our self-worth from God is enlightening and empowering for every reader.
2 reviews
August 30, 2023
Competition and comparison in relationships among women. Jenn points is to a better way (and to Christ) in She’s Not Your Enemy. I think you’ll find healing in this book and learn how to find freedom in how you relate to other women. One of my favorite parts of the book are the journaling pages and reflection questions at the end of each chapter. Highly recommend!
Profile Image for Rachel B.
13 reviews
September 1, 2023
I love how this book goes deeper than just the surface level struggle women have with comparison! The core issue of finding our identity in Christ is one that doesn't always enter this conversation, so I love that Jenn went there. The fact that there are also practical tools, reflection questions, and videos to help us dive deep here is a lovely bonus!
Profile Image for Wendy.
89 reviews1 follower
December 30, 2023
A great listen to help women start to try to understand and support other women, especially the ones we may not like or think don't like us. I would like to find other books like this to listen to to improve communication and have better days. Learning to shift my mindset into a clearer way of thinking and a not take things personally.
1 review3 followers
August 29, 2023
Wow, what a powerful read! This book has challenged and redefined how I see comparison, along with the mental and relational traps it can lead me into. Jenn is extremely honest, relatable and fun! Tons of scripture and practicals I can use everyday. A must read for all women!!
Profile Image for Jane McIntire.
4 reviews
September 2, 2023
Jenn has really poured her heart out into this book. It is such a refreshing perspective to help women understand who the true enemy is. We need to stop fighting each other and work together to fight Satan.
Profile Image for Kimberly.
13 reviews
September 7, 2023
This book sheds light on very important and relatable topics women experience. I found myself connecting with Jenn throughout the vulnerable pages. This book is a helpful tool all Christian women need! I especially love the reflective questions throughout each chapter.
Profile Image for Leslie Konhaeuser.
11 reviews1 follower
August 29, 2023
Jen has a way of making you really think about the patterns of thinking we have towards one another and pushing us toward loving community through confidence in the love of God. Love this book!
Profile Image for Jenny  Currie .
1 review
August 29, 2023
This book is such an eye opener to how God views us and how we connect with him and others. It’s helping me to cheer the women on in my life, we are all in this together.
Profile Image for Gina M Poirier.
48 reviews1 follower
September 8, 2023
Jenn’s writing invites you to sit down and have a cup of coffee with her and chat about your heart in a refreshing, healing way. I’m so grateful to have this book for a book club!
2 reviews
September 8, 2023
Yes! I loved reading this book and being encouraged. It’s also nice to know that I’m not alone in impacting my achievements to others.
Displaying 1 - 30 of 33 reviews

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