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2 pages, Audible Audio
First published April 21, 2022
Audio book source: Audible
Story Rating: 2.5 stars
Narrators: Tyler Darby & Lexi Evans
Narration Rating: 4 stars
Genre: Romance
Length: 1h 59m
This is all so dumb, and I’ve been laughing this shit off all day, but now that we’re here, and we’re going to find out if we’re really married, and maybe even start talking about divorce or annulment or lawyers…-Effie
Guy Coltrane can’t divorce me. My heart will shatter into a thousand pieces and he’ll see.-Effie
Boo-fucking-hoo.
I’ve always had small tits. It’s so bad, they used to make washboard jokes about me in college.-Effie
Of course, another small titties heroine. What's new? 🙄
I hate that he’s apologizing, gone so sad and solemn even as his hands stay on me. As if it’s his fault somehow. As if I’d mind. I’d be sad to have forgotten it, sure, but mostly I’d want to ask Drunk Effie for tips on how to make Guy Coltrane moan.-Effie
Okay, I get the idea of why she is saying that...but why in the hell shouldn't this guy feel the need to apologize? He possibly had sex with you when you weren't fully capable and aware, why on Earth shouldn't that worry him? ''As if I'd mind'' A normal person WOULD mind, feel concerned and anxious, even if it was a guy she was attracted to.
“You don’t fool me, boss man. You’re so basic. You love your virgin bride.”-Effie
How impetuous and mood killing, lmao.
Guy makes a wounded animal noise. Even in my haze, I make a mental note to tease him for that later.-Effie
Good way to put him off, make him self-conscious and make him end up not sharing his pleasure anymore. You're an idiot. Gosh she triggered me hard with this one. Not gonna lie, this reminded me of my ex who made fun of me for something similar. Teasing can be harmful. I wouldn't recommend it.
Bombshell Brides Series
(Series Rating: ⭐⭐⭐ /5)
1. Woke Up Wed** 2. Runaway Bride - 3. Mail Order Vow - 4. Fake Fiance
Let it be known that I'd sell my soul for a hot, salty potato.
-- Effie

Guy Coltrane has a VIP pass to my body. He can do anything he likes to any bit of it.
-- Effie
I squeeze Guy's head between my thighs, grinning up at the ceiling. "You don't fool me, boss man. You're so basic. You love your virgin bride."
