Republican Party Reptile: The Confessions, Adventures, Essays, and (Other) Outrages of...

by P.J. O'Rourke

"I think our agenda is clear. We are opposed to: government spending, Kennedy kids, seat-belt laws, busing our children anywhere other than Yale, trailer courts near our vacation homes, all tiny Third World countries that don't have banking secrecy laws, aerobics, the UN, taxation without tax loopholes, and jewelry on men. We are in favor of: guns, drugs, fast cars, free love (if our wives don't find out), a sound dollar, and a strong military with spiffy uniforms. There are thousands of people in America who feel this way, especially after three or four drinks. If all of us would unite and work together, we could give this country. . . well, a real bad hangover." "To say that P. J. O'Rourke is funny is like saying the Rocky Mountains are scenic-accurate but insufficient. At his best he's downright exhilarating . . . Republican Party Reptile is as rambunctiously entertaining as a greased pig catching contest. If you can find a funnier writer than P. J. O'Rourke, buy him a brandy, but don't lend him the keys to your pickup." -- Chicago Tribune; "Republican Party Reptile is hilarious. I laughed so hard reading this book that my armchair needs reupholstering. P. J. O'Rourke has got to be the funniest writer going, and boy does he go. This is high-octane wit, S. J. Perelman on acid." -- Christopher Buckley.

Genres: Humor, Politics, Nonfiction, Essays, Comedy, Satire, American

220 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 1987

About the author

Patrick Jake "P. J." O'Rourke is an American political satirist, journalist, writer, and author. O'Rourke is the H. L. Mencken Research Fellow at the Cato Institute and is a regular correspondent for The Atlantic Monthly, The American Spectator, and The Weekly Standard, and frequent panelist on National Public Radio's game show Wait Wait... Don't Tell Me!. Since 2011 O'Rourke has been a columnist at The Daily Beast. In the United Kingdom, he is known as the face of a long-running series of television advertisements for British Airways in the 1990s.

He is the author of 20 books, of which his latest, The Baby Boom: How It Got That Way (And It Wasn’t My Fault) (And I’ll Never Do It Again), was released January 2014. This was preceded on September 21, 2010, by Don't Vote! – It Just Encourages the Bastards, and on September 1, 2009, Driving Like Crazy with a reprint edition published on May 11, 2010. According to a 60 Minutes profile, he is also the most quoted living man in The Penguin Dictionary of Modern Humorous Quotations.

Reviews

[Mark Stalcup · Rating 4 out of 5]

Among P.J.'s earliest and funniest works, this book made me laugh back in 1989 when I was just an errant fratboy, and still does. Either I haven't matured at all (quite likely) or else it, like only the rarest humor, stands the test of time. "How to Drive Fast on Drugs While Getting Your Wing-Wang Squeezed and Not Spill Your Drink" still gives me the best line I could ever use about my speeding tickets: "Some believe 55 mph is the speed at which a spirited person parallel parks." It's wickedly fun and worth checking out.

[Loyd Mcintosh · Rating 4 out of 5]

In this collection of P.J. O'Rourke's essays he proves, once and for all, that conservatives are much funnier than liberals. Some examples:

- I'm a registered Republican and consider socialism a violation of the American principle that you shouldn't stick your nose in other people's business except to make a buck.

- In fact, safety has no place anywhere. Everything that's fun in life is dangerous. Horse races, for instance, are very dangerous. But attempt to design a safe horse and the result is a cow (an appalling animal to watch at the trotters.) And everything that isn't fun is dangerous too. It is impossible to be alive and safe.

- The forces of safety are afoot in the land. I, for one, believe it is a conspiracy— a conspiracy of Safety Nazis shouting "Sieg Health" and seeking to trammel freedom, liberty, and large noisy parties. The Safety Nazis advocate gun control, vigorous exercise, and health foods. The result can only be a disarmed, exhausted, and half-starved population ready to acquiesce to dictatorship of some kind.

- These were people who believed everything about the Soviet Union was perfect, but they were bringing their own toilet paper.

[Nancy · Rating 3 out of 5]

Testing my theory that conservatives are not as funny as liberals, I borrowed this book from Sandy and was proven wrong. Some of the essays are hilarious and some, at least for me, fall flat. So the three-star rating is an average. The book was published in the mid-eighties and some of the pieces are older with a dated feel, but I enjoy his wit and humor. And his foreign correspondent pieces on Lebanon and Indonesia are great pieces of travel writing.

[Eyehavenofilter · Rating 4 out of 5]

A hysterical commentary on politics and people watching. Republicans and reptiles have always been interchangeable to me, and I just am finally happy that there is a book that has both of these words in the same title,right where they belong!
this is a classic bit of humor and the most fun one can have sitting in a chair reading a book about politics. It could be even more fun if you chose to do it sans clothing?

[Dylan Rickards · Rating 4 out of 5]

Mr. O'Rourke is a drug-addled, right-wing, gun-nut, Catholic, libertarian, deranged one man army of evil. And those are his good qualities.

He is also hilarious and insightful. Any liberal should realize a conservative with a copy of Ayn Rand is a joke, but a conservative with a copy of O'Rourke is an awesome party guest, at least until they run out of cocaine.

[Matthew Dambro · Rating 5 out of 5]

Some of O'Rourke's best work from the mid 1980s; he is still one of the best humorists out there. Many of these essays are fall down funny. His snarkiness must be hereditary. He skewers Progressives with an ease that I could only dream of.

[Carl · Rating 5 out of 5]

One of the true classic testiments to debauchery out there.... Contrary to the title, this one has nothing to do with being a Republican, other than that the author is one -- and a raging party animal ;)

[Jeff · Rating 3 out of 5]

O'Rourke's writings are here to show that republicans can have a sense of humor and write about sex, drugs, and alcohol. Some of the writings were very funny, some not so much. I was entertained enough to want to seek out other writings by the author.

[Jan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Ferrari Refutes the Decline of the West will stay with me as long as I live, so long as I am driving on American interstates contemplating life with a radar detector. I also enjoyed O'Rourke's thoughts on proper dinner party conversation and on recreational use of ecstasy.

[One Flew · Rating 4 out of 5]

90% pure comic brilliance
10% unnecessary filler
I always love PJ's works and this was no exception. There are few if any in any form of print who are as candid and genuine as PJ and it shows in his work.

[J.P. · Rating 3 out of 5]

Some stories are stellar, others lacking. P.J. O'Rourke is pretty awesome regardless. A more tounge in cheek Hunter S. Thompson

[Robin · Rating 4 out of 5]

It can be hard to remember that O'Rourke used to be funny, but this is just great.

[jenn Bress · Rating 4 out of 5]

Republicans are pretty funny in general. This one is rip roaring hilarious and highly addictive even if I don't agree with 75% of his views

[Jonathan · Rating 3 out of 5]

Possibly not his best. But his worst is better than most.

[Tom · Rating 3 out of 5]

Quite an enjoyable ride through P.J. O'Rourke's mindset, the best bits are his journalism, I wasn't as impressed by the fiction so much. Still, worth a read and I intend to read more of his books.

[Dave · Rating 2 out of 5]

I was disheartened by how badly O'Rourke has aged. I used to steal jokes from him. Now he reads like a collection of tics and forgotten references.

[Vicki Cline · Rating 3 out of 5]

This one's pretty old, articles from various publications collected in 1985. It was strange to see Reagan and the Soviet Union being written of in the present tense. Despite the title, there was very little of political talk here. My favorites are the articles he writes about being in a foreign country. P.J. is always funny even if I don't agree with his politics.

[angrykitty · Rating 4 out of 5]

great satire. not a republican, but it made me kinda want to be one (but not really). o'rourke used to be one of my favorite authors. i used to read all his articles in rolling stone, and then i proceeded to buy all his books...

[jack · Rating 5 out of 5]

Great collection of humorous essays and short stories.

[Lynn · Rating 5 out of 5]

Hi-larious.

[Bo · Rating 5 out of 5]

Really funny! Something different. Highly recommended.

[Ricki · Rating 2 out of 5]

Disappointing except for the trip to Russia.

[Douglas Wilson · Rating 3 out of 5]

Good.

[Alexis]

Republican Party Reptile: The Confessions, Adventures, Essays, and (Other) Outrages of... by P. J. O'Rourke (1995)

[Chris · Rating 5 out of 5]

Laugh out loud funny. and I don;t say that often. Just as funny as when I read it 20 years ago.

[David · Rating 2 out of 5]

so so

[Thomas Bundy · Rating 4 out of 5]

PJ O'Rourke is hilarious. 'Nuff said.

[Joey Knightbrook · Rating 3 out of 5]

funny at times but just not nearly as funny as some of PJ's better works like Parliament of Whores

[B.J. · Rating 5 out of 5]

the best one is the one where he drives the ferrari.

[Tim · Rating 4 out of 5]

By turns hilarious, candid, profound and misfiring. Well worth a read. It speaks very eloquently of the time in which it was written.