Some of life's trials seem too deep for our words of comfort to have any meaning. But even in the face of such soul-wrenching griefs, there is hope. ''The gospel of Jesus Christ is not insurance against pain,'' writes Dr. Carlfred Broderick, former president of the Association of Mormon Counselors and Psychotherapists. ''It is a resource in event of pain.'' His unforgettable, real-life examples illustrate the matchless power of the gospel to help us rise above even abuse or injustice. A perfect gift for anyone who is going through hard times.
Carlfred Bartholomew Broderick (April 7, 1932 - July 27, 1999) was a 20th-century psychologist and family therapist, a scholar of marriage and family relations at the University of Southern California, an author of several books, and a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. He was born in Salt Lake City, Utah in 1932, and he died of cancer in 1999 in Cerritos, California at the age of 67.
This was a quick little read that I quite enjoyed. A message that I think would help so many to be shared. It’s so easy to think that if I’m obedient and be a good little Christian nothing bad will happen. Not true. This book is beautifully summed up by this quote, “The gospel of Jesus Christ is not insurance against pain...it is a resource to deal with your pain.”
The very first story the author shares is the only reason to read this tiny little book. It is just a 20-minute read of only 58 pages. Every story except one features an LDS woman and how she overcame adversity by using the gospel as a resource against the pain that comes with such events.
The reason it will only take you 20 minutes or so to read this little book and the reason why almost all the stories feature women is because the entire text is the talk the author gave at a BYU Women's Conference probably back in the 90's. After Carlfred Broderick died of cancer in 1999, Emily Watts (now the executive editor at Deseret Book) decided to publish this entire talk as a inspirational book.
The very first story (and the motivation for me to re-check this book out of the library so I could find this particular story and use it in something I was writing) the author shares his experience attending a New Beginnings for the incoming eleven year olds into the young women's program in his California stake. The explicit program was heavily focused on following the yellow brick road with the performers gushing a complete guarantee-or-your-money-back to the young girls that staying on this particular covenant path/yellow brick road to Oz/Celestial kingdom would make all their temple marriage and eternal family dreams come true!!! The author was then asked if he, as stake president, had anything to add?
Every ward and stake should have a Carlfred Broderick. He stood up and proceeded to completely deconstruct that over-the-top message and performance the young women leaders had painstakingly put together for their program. To paraphrase he pretty much told the girls in attendance: "Do not think for one minute that bad things will not happen to you just because you followed all the steps and checked off all the boxes. THE GOSPEL OF JESUS CHRIST IS NOT INSURANCE AGAINST PAIN. IT IS RESOURCE IN EVENT OF PAIN," That is the take away message of the entire book.
It is a good message but the seven following stories he shares do not really emphasize how the women (and his stepfather) used the gospel as a resource to cope with the trials they were going through. They just asked their stake president (the author) for priesthood blessings with the expectation that his faith would make everything work out. Except that's not the way the gospel works. Here is a brief outline of the stories (I read so you don't have to-you're welcome!)
1. A sister in his stake married in the temple to a man who turned out to be a real jerk who went inactive and completely fell away from the church. She came to the author requesting a priesthood blessing which he gave. Her children eventually served missions and helped each other return to the covenant path. All are now active members of the church who did not choose to follow their less-active father's example. Good for them!
2. A woman who grew up in horrible circumstances, every form of physical, emotional and sexual abuse you could name-she went through it. Prince Charming came along and married her in the temple but, understandably, she continued to suffer from depression and mistrust of men. She went to the author, again her stake president, for advice and he was inspired to share the message the Lord wanted her to know about the horrible cycle of abuse and how the cycle can stop with us and not be passed onto the next generation.
3. While on a trip, the author was asked to meet with a sister missionary who had studied his textbooks (he's a psychotherapist with a Ph. D.) and was a fan of his work and public speaking. After just six weeks out, this sister was determined to go home early-nobody could talk her out of it. Like the woman in story #2 she had also grown up in a horrible abusive home and now felt unworthy to be out here in the mission field. The author convinced her otherwise reminding her she was a Princess with great worth and value. In tears she agreed to turn around and not get on that flight home but continue to serve and return with honor.
4. This is the story many will remember as it is the longest. The woman featured comes across as a self entitled snob. She wants to have a third child despite the doctor's warnings her body is done. She had the baby boy anyway but now she is unable to nurse the child because, like Job, she broke out in awful red spots and had to take medication which could harm the baby. She demanded a priesthood blessing (getting one from a general authority would've been better, she told him, but she supposed a stake president would have to do so she could get her miracle!). Except the priesthood blessing didn't work. Her spots did not miraculously disappear right away. I myself would NEVER call my stake president (at 2 in the morning mind you!) accusing him of failing in his priesthood responsibility telling him to get over here right now and fix this because I'm still covered in spots and look terrible! "Where is my miracle?" she demands of both him and the Lord. She wants another priesthood blessing. Now. What else can the author do but comply? The woman stood up in testimony meeting the very next day and bore witness of the Savior's love for her. That very afternoon the spots went away and she could nurse her baby. Whew!
6. This story is about the author's stepfather (his mother married three times!) who was a good man who also served as bishop. Now the man he always considered to be his father is dying of a painful physical illness but the example he sets in patience and waiting upon the Lord inspires him. The author asked this man for a father's blessing. His stepfather is an example to us all in using pain to draw closer to God instead of letting it push us away and become bitter.
7. Finally the last story he shares is about a woman in a different ward and stake but a good friend whose two year old child accidently fell into a neighbor's pool and drowned. Weeks in the hospital spent with the entire ward rallying around this family, fasting every Sunday for the recovery of the child. The mother had a newborn who also fell ill with a high fever and, ironically was staying just down the hall in the same hospital as the two-year old. Understandably, this mother was terrified God was going to require her to give up not just one but TWO of her precious children while she was determined to keep both. Two agonizing months later, the mother humbled herself to let God take the two year old who never fully recovered from the accident but the baby lived. The woman was content to let God's will be done.
It is not always easy to "let go and let God" but all the examples in these stories illustrate that principle as well. God does not love us less when we experience soul shaking trials, pain and adversity.
A good friend, whom I love and admire gave me this book for Christmas and I really enjoyed it. I loved the philosophy of his idea of pain and life. Broderick has a very simple yet devasting way of explaining pain; we asked for it. We must have agreed or chosen the life we would have, including all the trails that came with it. It gave me a lot to think about.
I thought his point was insightful, but I found the book muddled down by the examples he gave. The women who he profiled are not the kind of women I relate to. For example, a woman was given a blessing that she would have a child and be able to nurse it. After the miracle child was conceived and born, however, she contracted a strange skin disease which covered her body in red itchy bloody patches. The only way to get rid of them was to take a strong medication which, what for it...could not be ingested by the nursing baby. I am the kind of woman who says, "Give me the medicince, I will give baby a darned bottle and not think twice about it." But her faith was really tried because she had been blessed to be able to nurse the baby and she wanted to be healed. I do not mean to diminish the pain or suffering she went through both physically and mentally over this, I understand that some things are trials for some and not for others. But I personally draw no strength from these stories that make the subject come across as a pious fanatic rather than a thoughtful person I could look up to.
But I still got the message of the book and I liked it. Can I be saved? That is yet to be determined!!
A sweet little book full of words of wisdom. How many times have we over tried to present wonderful programs for the Young Women only to miss the real mark. Carlfred makes us realize that even with the Gospel there are no guarantees that we will walk down the yellow brick road with no real heartbreaks or tragedies. Unfortunately even if we are trying our hardest there may still be unhappiness and things may not go smoothly. What the Gospel does is make us stronger and we feel the support we need as we strive to do our best. Reading this is an hour well worth the time.
Fast, easy read. Finished it in 20 minutes (it's only 50 some odd pages). It was filled with stories. I love stories. These were true life applications of principles we strive to live each day. Very moving.
This is a quick read and very good. His theme is that the gospel of Jesus Christ is not insurance against pain. It is a resource in event of pain, pain that will surely come to all of us.
He uses true stories from the lives of people he knows to illustrate how pain can be our greatest teacher and can strengthen faith. The stories are powerful.
This book was originally a talk given by the author at BYU. It is a short good read about why adversity needs to be a part of our lives. We need to learn how to grow from our trials.
“What do you say to a person in pain? What kind of answers are there for the truly hard questions of life, the imponderables, the time when every piece of counsel or word of comfort that comes to mind just seems hollow?” Isn’t that the truth! How do you mourn with those that mourn the right way? How do you yourself not push people away when you can’t take hearing another meaningless advice when you’re drowning in sorrow? Reading this address was a wonderful honest conversation to have to gain a deeper perspective of what our relationship with our Maker can and should be like. The Gospel of Jesus Christ is truly a shelter from the storm, but not a guarantee that the storms won’t come. And there is tremendous comfort in knowing and understanding that.
There is a childlike faith will we pray and our prayers are answered as we expect. We keep the commandments and enjoy the blessings that are promised. But what happens when those blessings don't come? this short volume based on a talk given at BYU talks about the different experiences of the author when their faith was tried. There is a kind of testimony that happens when you are strengthened in your trials, but that God's support is very real and this book seeks to convey those experiences. I can see this book helping a lot of people.
This book was a great example of short story of adversity and the atonement. There are difficult things that can happen in life, but they don't happen to you...they happen in order that you learn whilst on the road of mortality. I really enjoyed the style of speaking (probably previously a talk) and the metaphors and examples of real life for those of us who don't have the fairy tale life...great job!
Very impactful! He uses powerful examples of how adversity can work in people's lives. We must turn towards God in our suffering, not away, if we are to grow from adversity. Accept his will. Beautifully written.
This is a tiny book, a quick read,but one I will read over and over again. Broderick is fun, and also goes deeply into what adversity is able to do FOR us, as opposed to only raging against what it does TO us. Highly recommend it.
"The gospel of Jesus Christ is not insurance against pain. It is a resource in the event of pain." As we come to recognize who we really are, we understand the mysteries of the kingdom. We are always safe in His love.
Quick read. Here's what I liked. "The uses of adversity are the uses we put to them" "You can tell somebody in plain English, but they still don't know in their hearts who they really are"
He told a few stories about how to grow from your adversities.
Thanks to my friend and former roommate at BYU, Sherrill Funk, for recommending this little book to me. My husband and I have had some adversity in our lives, as we all do, but it seems like more serious problems in recent years as he has begun dialysis treatments three times a week. We have had a cough and a cold this last few weeks, and so I was a little "down" when I read Sherrill's review of The Uses of Adversity. I thought, "I need to know the uses of adversity this week!" so I bought it for my kindle, and read it last night. The 5 short stories of other people's adversities and the lessons they learned were helpful to me in putting our troubles in perspective, and enlightened me as to the purposes of our adversities. At the conclusion of his book, Carlfred Broderick gives his testimony as to his beliefs about adversity. "And now my witness to you, that God lives, and he does not live les though you have injustice and adversity and pain and unkindness and violence and betrayal. God is in his heaven, and he loves us. His son died for us. There is hope. The uses of adversity are whatever use we put them to. May these hone us and purify us and teach us and not destroy us, because of who we are and who God is and what our relationship to him is, is my fervent prayer."
This is a quick read--I read it out loud to my husband while driving. I've always loved Dr. Broderick's books. Since in died in the late 90's I was surprised to find this on the shelf. It is a republication of a talk he gave at a BYU women's conference. His teaching style is so powerful because he teaches with stories and not lecture. The principles are so easy to remember--and relate to. As a therapist and an LDS stake president, he had many memorable experiences from which he learned, and teaches us. Unlike so many books about adversity, he doesn't try to explain the reasons for adversity or the "benefits" of it. He just teaches that we can USE adversity for our gain. You will remember these stories, and hopefully gain some personal insight into the uses of adversity.
I loved this book!! I have a fascination with our pre-mortal existence- I know that's weird but what can I say? After a very hard year and saying over and over that I never would have signed up for the things that came my way I realized by reading this book that indeed I most certainly did!! I have never liked the word endure- it always sounds so gloomy to me but I see now that sometimes things are gloomy and when we endure how blessed we are because that means we have learned and grown spiritually. I don't ever want a repeat of that year but I do appreciate all the things that came out of it!!
After hearing Emily Watts talk from this book at a Time Out for Women, I decided to buy this tiny little book. When I got home I thougth,"Why did I buy this book about adversity and pain? Right now evrything is pretty good in my life." A couple of days later, I heard from a dear friend that the night before I had bought this excellent book, her daughters had been in a terrible car accident in which one of them was killed. I'm trying to decide if I bought this book for the daughter who survived. My heart is with that family and knowing they have the gospel of Jesus Christ to strengthen them in their pain is a great balm to me.