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Loving Someone Gay
With gay marriage making headlines across the nation, LOVING SOMONE GAY is perhaps more relevant and needed than ever. In the original 1977 edition, Dr. Don Clark brought the first truly positive profile of gay identity to a general audience and contributed to the groundswell of the gay rights movement. In the 1980s, AIDS forever changed not only gay communities, but also the global landscape as prejudice yielded to knowledge that the HIV virus crosses the imagined barriers of gender, sexual orientation, and lifestyle. A new edition responded to the crisis. Thoroughly revised for the fourth time, LOVING SOMEONE GAY remains the most comprehensive profile of positive gay identity in print, offering courageous support and compassionate guidance for gay men and lesbians and the friends and families who love them.
310 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1977
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Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews
May 21, 2023
Read this when a family member came out in the '80's. No earth shattering revelations but offered insights into issues that people sometimes encounter.
August 13, 2024
A GAY PSYCHOLOGIST'S HELPFUL BOOK FOR FAMILIES AND FRIENDS
Clinical psychologist Don Clark wrote in the Preface to this 1977 book, "If you care about someone who is Gay, are Gay yourself, or think you might be, this book is for you... [The book] offers suggestions for making it a more growthful experience... [it] talks to fathers, mothers, husbands, wives, brothers, sisters, good friends, and others who love someone Gay and want to know how to become better related... I do not mind sharing myself, as a clinical psychologist or as a Gay man."
He recounts that at a costume party he was asked, "Why did they have to take a perfectly good word like `gay' and ruin it...?" and he replied, "the roots of the word usage had to do with people who deviated from the straight and narrow, first theatrical people and then prostitutes who led `the Gay life.'" (Pg. 1)
He details a violent attack on a gay man that was not investigated by the police, "We are one of the last minority groups to pay taxes while not enjoying the protection of life and property. These things happen to visible members of our group every day." (Pg. 29)
He observes, "I like knowing that other men are potential love partners rather than competitors or enemies... I like walking down the street and exchanging a glance and a smile with another Gay person, acknowledging that we are related and we know it. I like the camp humor that we have developed as a means of spotlight the insanity of most convention... and our ability to laugh and keep afloat in spite of it all. I like the sharing of tenderness and compassion that is largely denied to non-Gay men... I like the way Gay women relate to me as a person, an equal, and not as the `opposite sex' to be flattered, feared, or manipulated." (Pg. 48)
He says, "We may be near the day when Gay people no longer will make one another feel bad. The sad Cinderella scene of some of today's Gay bars may end. One sees bodies packed into such a bar. Only a few are the correct age range and body arrangement to meet the beauty criteria of our contemporary culture... They are seeming Cinderellas, transformed from the life of oppression in the daytime world by the soft lighting and loud music of the bar... It is a sad scene that has been constructed by the anti-Gay, pro-youth, superficial beauty programming. But it would not continue if we did not provide the cast of characters and pay the bill at the cash register." (Pg. 153-154)
Though more than 45 years old, this book is still a very useful one for promoting understanding.
Clinical psychologist Don Clark wrote in the Preface to this 1977 book, "If you care about someone who is Gay, are Gay yourself, or think you might be, this book is for you... [The book] offers suggestions for making it a more growthful experience... [it] talks to fathers, mothers, husbands, wives, brothers, sisters, good friends, and others who love someone Gay and want to know how to become better related... I do not mind sharing myself, as a clinical psychologist or as a Gay man."
He recounts that at a costume party he was asked, "Why did they have to take a perfectly good word like `gay' and ruin it...?" and he replied, "the roots of the word usage had to do with people who deviated from the straight and narrow, first theatrical people and then prostitutes who led `the Gay life.'" (Pg. 1)
He details a violent attack on a gay man that was not investigated by the police, "We are one of the last minority groups to pay taxes while not enjoying the protection of life and property. These things happen to visible members of our group every day." (Pg. 29)
He observes, "I like knowing that other men are potential love partners rather than competitors or enemies... I like walking down the street and exchanging a glance and a smile with another Gay person, acknowledging that we are related and we know it. I like the camp humor that we have developed as a means of spotlight the insanity of most convention... and our ability to laugh and keep afloat in spite of it all. I like the sharing of tenderness and compassion that is largely denied to non-Gay men... I like the way Gay women relate to me as a person, an equal, and not as the `opposite sex' to be flattered, feared, or manipulated." (Pg. 48)
He says, "We may be near the day when Gay people no longer will make one another feel bad. The sad Cinderella scene of some of today's Gay bars may end. One sees bodies packed into such a bar. Only a few are the correct age range and body arrangement to meet the beauty criteria of our contemporary culture... They are seeming Cinderellas, transformed from the life of oppression in the daytime world by the soft lighting and loud music of the bar... It is a sad scene that has been constructed by the anti-Gay, pro-youth, superficial beauty programming. But it would not continue if we did not provide the cast of characters and pay the bill at the cash register." (Pg. 153-154)
Though more than 45 years old, this book is still a very useful one for promoting understanding.
October 25, 2015
2010 Rainbow Awards Honorable Mention (5* from at least 1 judge)
Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews