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Blastoff Uranus!
Product Description:
It's the future. God is dead. Mankind is out of control, without purpose, and at the brink of self-destruction. Follow the zany antics of a ragtag crew of volunteers as they head into deep space to rescue planet Earth. If you like to laugh, this is the humor book for you! Ridiculously funny!
Some scenes you'll discover inside this book...
LAWLESS
Well, crew, you all know why we're here.
CREW
(murmur of many sarcastic voices)
Well, no. Actually, we don't.
Is that a rhetorical question?
Beats me!
Haven't got a clue.
Was there a memo?
Huh?
LAWLESS
Oh, for God's sake, we're going to Uranus!
****
(much time has obviously passed, banana peels, empty coffee cups, cigarette butts and assorted trash are floating in the air, CREW in spacesuits, haggard, men unshaved, LAWLESS lolls in his seat and looks out window, YUTZ plays a video game, LOVE files her nails, DOKTOR and FRANKENSTEIN play checkers, CORKY is curled up asleep and floating in the air...
****
LAWLESS
Back in your seats! Back in your seats! We're going down!
EXTERIOR: long shot of Probe Uranus screaming through space, planet comes up quickly
VIEW from bridge window: planet's surface fills window, ZOOM IN rapidly
CLOSEUP: LAWLESS
LAWLESS
(fights accelerator)
We're in the planet's gravitational pull. Can't slow down! Ahhh! We're coming in too fast. This is it, crew! Kiss Uranus goodbye!
It's the future. God is dead. Mankind is out of control, without purpose, and at the brink of self-destruction. Follow the zany antics of a ragtag crew of volunteers as they head into deep space to rescue planet Earth. If you like to laugh, this is the humor book for you! Ridiculously funny!
Some scenes you'll discover inside this book...
LAWLESS
Well, crew, you all know why we're here.
CREW
(murmur of many sarcastic voices)
Well, no. Actually, we don't.
Is that a rhetorical question?
Beats me!
Haven't got a clue.
Was there a memo?
Huh?
LAWLESS
Oh, for God's sake, we're going to Uranus!
****
(much time has obviously passed, banana peels, empty coffee cups, cigarette butts and assorted trash are floating in the air, CREW in spacesuits, haggard, men unshaved, LAWLESS lolls in his seat and looks out window, YUTZ plays a video game, LOVE files her nails, DOKTOR and FRANKENSTEIN play checkers, CORKY is curled up asleep and floating in the air...
****
LAWLESS
Back in your seats! Back in your seats! We're going down!
EXTERIOR: long shot of Probe Uranus screaming through space, planet comes up quickly
VIEW from bridge window: planet's surface fills window, ZOOM IN rapidly
CLOSEUP: LAWLESS
LAWLESS
(fights accelerator)
We're in the planet's gravitational pull. Can't slow down! Ahhh! We're coming in too fast. This is it, crew! Kiss Uranus goodbye!
533 pages, Kindle Edition
First published April 11, 2011
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