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Talking To Tweens: Getting It Right Before It Gets Rocky with Your 8- to 12-Year-Old
They may look sweet and compliant, but these days children aged between 8 and 12—“tweens” —are fast emerging as a force to be reckoned with. Gaining in confidence, expecting more freedom, and increasingly targeted commercially, they present many new and challenging issues for parents. But getting the relationship right during these important years can build a rewarding trust and openness that will see parents through the rocky teenage years ahead.Giving sound advice that is firmly rooted in the real world and based on a clear understanding of tweens’ needs, parenting expert Elizabeth Hartley-Brewer explains how staying close to our children while beginning to let go helps us achieve the balance that is so important for the parent-child relationship. Tackling everyday issues of real concern, Talking to Tweens offers practical, down-to-earth, and reassuring guidance on: Self-discipline, consideration, and kindnessPeer pressure and bullyingAllowances and spending moneyBody image and healthy eatingSex and pubertyFamily disruptionsRisk, danger, and responsibilitySchool problems and work pressureNurturing self-esteem and identity
324 pages, Paperback
First published September 13, 2004
11 people are currently reading
73 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 14 of 14 reviews
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February 16, 2025Children aged between 8 and 12- "tweens"- are fast emerging as a force to be reckoned with.
They are gaining confidence, expecting more freedom, and increasingly targeted commercially, and they present many new and challenging issues for parents.
However, getting the relationship right during these critical years can build rewarding trust and openness to help parents through the rocky teenage years ahead.
The authors advise who tweens are and what their needs are at this age.
It was an informative book on facing the tween age.
They are gaining confidence, expecting more freedom, and increasingly targeted commercially, and they present many new and challenging issues for parents.
However, getting the relationship right during these critical years can build rewarding trust and openness to help parents through the rocky teenage years ahead.
The authors advise who tweens are and what their needs are at this age.
It was an informative book on facing the tween age.
April 16, 2018
good reminders.
March 31, 2019
I have made so many notes in this book. Totally worth it.
July 26, 2011
This british look at parenting kids on the cusp of their teenage years is pretty grim - a sort of worst-case-scenario situation. However, it had some very good advice on puberty and how children feel about certain life issues, like changing schools, growing apart from friends, when difficulty of any sort strikes the family. Some worthwhile stuff for the average kid's parents, and definitely a must read for what to do if your tween is exhibiting any negative behavior (anorexia, shoplifting, bullying).
August 10, 2011
Some good pointers in this book. There's an emphasis on respect and communication, and it covers tween's daily pressures and personal perspective, which I hadn't thought about much before. It was a reminder to me to get out of "mother mode" sometimes and listen and colaborate in decision-making. I did appreciate the research results directly from tweens. I like that this book had different suggestions for girls vs. boys.
Big take-away: Don't tease tween boys (even in play). -e
Big take-away: Don't tease tween boys (even in play). -e
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August 7, 2007What little I have read in this book is interesting. Slow going because I can't read it around my children, particularly the older one, who is convinced this book is evidence of some sort of conspiracy against kids, him in particular, at the same time as it is some source of information about the secrets of human motivation.
August 5, 2007
Ever feel like you're just not quite getting through to your young preteen? This book is full of insight and enlightening. Good for every parent no matter how good of a parent you feel you already are.
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August 10, 2016This is a very insightful book, giving parents, teachers and caregivers a sense of where this group is socially and emotionally. Effective communication with tweens is imperative to counteract the persuasive (and pervasive) media messages aimed specifically at this group.
August 27, 2008
Hoping it helps...
April 12, 2010
Better to use as a reference guide...
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July 12, 2009Good information to help me understand my TWEEN!
November 15, 2010
good info, mostly common sense, but it was nice to know my kid is normal
February 19, 2016
I especially liked the communication parts and self-esteem. I skimmed more of the later chapters that I don't need help currently with ;-)
April 6, 2017
It was okay. I read this several years ago when my children were preschool age. Mostly, I was interested in it at that time because of my work as a middle school teacher. This time around, my children are 8 and 9 years old. I have a different opinion now.
This book struck me as being targeted to parents who have difficulty with saying "No" -- the kind of parents who are afraid to make their kids upset because their kids won't like them if they don't let them do or have what they want. We don't have that problem in our household, so a lot of the advice just seemed like common sense to me and not all that useful.
The advice about allowances and giving kids expendable money for no reason at all did not make sense to me -- and AMOUNT of money given to kids each week for this purpose seemed ludicrous, in my opinion. I know this was based on average amounts reported by parents, but you've got to be kidding me. If I gave each child $8.50 week, that would cost us close to $70 a month! -- and for what? So my kids can blow it on "junk" they want? If we gave them that much money per week, they'd be required to pay for their own necessities such as clothes, shoes, etc. I didn't notice any mention of putting money aside for charity or giving to others, which kind of bothered me. To put this in my personal perspective -- My two kids earn $2 each a week. I say "earn" because if they don't do their weekly chores, they don't get anything. They get to keep $1 for spending however they want, while the other dollar is for "giving" (usually this goes in the collection at church, but they are free to choose who/what/when to give it away to). Since you can't buy much with $1 these days, they have to actually save up to buy something of significance to them -- even if it's just a $4 toy.
It's possible my opinion of this book is related to the fact that I have over a decade of experience teaching and working with kids this age -- not much new or shocking here to read, for me personally. Maybe I'm just not in the "target" audience.
This book struck me as being targeted to parents who have difficulty with saying "No" -- the kind of parents who are afraid to make their kids upset because their kids won't like them if they don't let them do or have what they want. We don't have that problem in our household, so a lot of the advice just seemed like common sense to me and not all that useful.
The advice about allowances and giving kids expendable money for no reason at all did not make sense to me -- and AMOUNT of money given to kids each week for this purpose seemed ludicrous, in my opinion. I know this was based on average amounts reported by parents, but you've got to be kidding me. If I gave each child $8.50 week, that would cost us close to $70 a month! -- and for what? So my kids can blow it on "junk" they want? If we gave them that much money per week, they'd be required to pay for their own necessities such as clothes, shoes, etc. I didn't notice any mention of putting money aside for charity or giving to others, which kind of bothered me. To put this in my personal perspective -- My two kids earn $2 each a week. I say "earn" because if they don't do their weekly chores, they don't get anything. They get to keep $1 for spending however they want, while the other dollar is for "giving" (usually this goes in the collection at church, but they are free to choose who/what/when to give it away to). Since you can't buy much with $1 these days, they have to actually save up to buy something of significance to them -- even if it's just a $4 toy.
It's possible my opinion of this book is related to the fact that I have over a decade of experience teaching and working with kids this age -- not much new or shocking here to read, for me personally. Maybe I'm just not in the "target" audience.
Displaying 1 - 14 of 14 reviews