Finding H.F. by Julia Watts

by Julia Watts

Abandoned by her mother and raised by her loving but religiously zealous grandmother, 16-year-old Heavenly Faith Simms (H.F. for short) has never felt like she belonged anywhere. When she finds her mother's address in a drawer, she and her best friend, Bo, an emotionally repressed gay boy, hit the road in Bo's scrap heap of a car and head south. Their journey through the heart of the American South awakens both teens to the realization that there is a life waiting for them that is very different from what they have known and that the concept of family is more far-reaching than they had ever imagined.Julia Watts is the author of the novels Wedding Bell Blues, Piece of My Heart, Phases of the Moon, and Wildwood Flowers. She lives in Knoxville, Tennessee.

Genres: LGBT, Young Adult, Queer, Fiction, Lesbian, Realistic Fiction, Contemporary

Mass Market Paperback

First published September 16, 2001

About the author

Julia Watts is the author of over a dozen novels, including the Lambda Literary Award-winning Finding H.F.., the Lambda Literary and Golden Crown Literary Society Award finalist The Kind of Girl I Am, and the Lambda Literary Award finalist and Golden Crown Literary Award-winning Secret City. She holds a B.A. in English from The University of Tennessee, an M.A. in English from the University of Louisville, an MFA in Writing from Spalding University, and a PhD in Literacy Studies from The University of Tennessee. She lives in Knoxville and is a member of the East Tennessee Writers Hall of Fame. Her young adult novel, Quiver, was a SIBA Okra Pick and a finalist for the Foreword Indies Award, and her young adult novel Needlework won an Honorable Mention in the Foreword Indie Awards and was selected by the Library of Congress for its "Great Reads from Great Places" program. Her new novel for adults, Lovesick Blossoms, is available from Three Rooms Press.

Reviews

[Jacquelyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I adored this book so freaking much and recommend it to EVERYONE

[Tony Murchison · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love everything Julia Watts has written and this book is no exception. Great characters. Very believable storyline that rings true for many queer people who grew up in Appalachia.

[Linh Nguyen · Rating 5 out of 5]

It's been a while since I last read a YA having it all down to perfection: beautiful, insightful, hopeful, bonus a thrilling road trip (between two best friends with an incredibly strong bond). The old school, small town atmosphere is not depressing like Beauty of the Broken but remains both oppressing and endearing at the same time. H.F voice is so powerful, full of heart and courage. From my point of view, every teen, gay or not, should give this book a try.

P.S. The cover Goodreads displays here is damn creepy though, I don't think it has anything to do with the actual content :))

[Marjorie Elwood · Rating 4 out of 5]

It was one of those "I need something light to read" nights, last night, and this fit the bill perfectly. It's a road-trip-coming-out-journey through the American South with two very charming protagonists. The writing is quick-paced and funny and the characters are believable. Winner of the 2001 Lambda Literary Award for Young Adult Fiction.

[Rae · Rating 5 out of 5]

Love this book, love all the sites of where they went, and the LGBT community they discover. Love the christian and gay conflicts.

[C.J.M. Naylor · Rating 4 out of 5]

A great story about embracing your identity and finding out who you truly are!

[Shannon Castle · Rating 2 out of 5]

This book desperately needed paragraphs. I find it hard to read when all the writing is just like a massive chunk and not broken up at all.

[Dide · Rating 4 out of 5]

This really provides a perspective of rural America and the challenges faced by being gay. A good book.

[Marina Klimova · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was a heartwarming book that is just nice even though I don't agree with the overarching message. I bet the main character of the story would label me just like her kind but never-be-able-to-understand Memaw. I had to read this book for a children's literature class so I didn't pick this up just to harp about it. I'm sorry, Jesus did say that a man leaves his mother and is joined with a woman and they become one. Anyways, I felt very privileged reading this book because even being an immigrant I still have experienced as much of the world as Wendy did. Altogether, this book had a message of love and understanding and it gets better for LGBTQ+ individuals and I can't say anything against that because my heart broke with all the characters in this novel. Still, the crucial detail of Christianity just being old-fashioned or stubborn for stating homosexuality is against the bible, is not anything I can justify with a thorough look of the entirety of the bible. Really, I'm not some ignorant Memaw that is just set in her ways. I understand what they are getting at and one key factor of that lifestyle's flaw is even hinted at in this novel, HIV/AID's. The human body wasn't made for those kinds of relationships so the human body ultimately suffers. More treatments and attention and care and inclusivity would ultimately soften the blow on the body when having that kind of relationship but I don't know if it will eradicate the early deaths of individuals practicing homosexuality. Only time will tell. More of these kinds of books will check the box off for inclusivity and more funds from celebrities widespread acceptance and the government will help with treatments so it is a matter of time until we see the effects on society. I'm all for love and acceptance too but caring for the body is a thing too.

[Keith Akers · Rating 4 out of 5]

What a charming, pleasant book, which has the feel of a light romance, even though the romance part (while it is definitely there!) is not the most prominent element. Really, it's more about friendship and adventure with some romance thrown in as a bonus. What I liked about the book was that it realistically, but affectionately, describes what it's like to grow up around Appalachia --- though that term, as I recall, is never used. It's home, but it's also oppressive, especially if you're queer.

Another thing I liked: the book introduces several disparate plot threads that look completely separate but in the end are merged into one. A stranger comes to town. Girl meets girl. The heroine goes on a journey. The object of the journey, H. F.'s mother, turns out to be a somewhat predictable character. But the way the journey evolves is anything but predictable and winds up adding to H. F.'s life.

[Angie · Rating 3 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this for the most part. H.F. is a wonderful narrator and an interesting character, and I think this is where the narrative excels.

So H.F. lives in a small Kentucky town where she's one of two gay kids. Her mother had her when just was a teenager and then quickly bounced when H.F. was still a baby. She has no idea who her father is. But she has her memaw, a deeply religious woman who has tried to raise H.F. right. After a disastrous first kiss the new girl and accidentally stumbling upon an address for her mother, H.F. and her very gay BFF take a roadtrip to Florida to meet her.

There's nothing particularly groundbreaking to this story. I came to it expecting a story about the intersection of faith with queer identity and, while it's there, it wasn't what I was expecting since H.F. doesn't believe in God. H.F. is not bothered that she's queer; she just knows she can't come out while she lives in her town with her memaw, so it's not a coming out story. And it's definitely not a romance.

But H.F. is compelling in her own right. I loved the way she speaks and thinks and confronts her own biases over and over.

This story was first published in 2011 and it definitely feels dated, but I still enjoyed it.

[Jennifer Wallbrown · Rating 5 out of 5]

I had to read this for one of my college classes, and at first my expectations were low. Not because of the book itself, but just because the other books we had had to read so far were not super interesting to me. But this... I absolutely loved it. It’s heartwarming, hopeful, and just lovely. Read it!

[Sophia Barsuhn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I have never in my life read a book that so perfectly shows what it would be like to be queer and grow up in the backend of rural Kentucky. Sometimes the lack of knowledge Bo and H.F. has was painful. They said ignorant things not to be hateful, but just because they didn't know any better. This was a sweet read.

[Melissa Helton · Rating 4 out of 5]

How rare to find a book set out of east Kentucky that shows the experience of young queer people. I love how this story engages with poverty, religious bigotry, racial segregation, and issues of queer youth (like lack of queer community in rural places, bullying, ostracization, and homelessness). I look forward to reading more by this author.

[Ronja · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really liked this book, although it is very short to the point of sometimes feeling a bit rushed. The scenes in the book do feel very alive, but the overarching story could have done with more scenes in it.

[Mazdyn · Rating 4 out of 5]

I really enjoyed this book, and I think it is a great YA book for any young queer person! It's incredibly heartfelt. The characters are superb, and I love the adventure they go on.

[Jennifer · Rating 3 out of 5]

Finding H.F. addresses several issues, going beyond the typical “coming out” theme in books labeled as GLBT, and addressing regional, educational, religious, and socioeconomic differences in America. In fact, the main character, H.F., short for Heavenly Faith, the name that her devout Southern Baptist grandmother gave her, doesn’t even come out to her grandmother. Rather, Finding H.F. is, in the words on the back of the paperback version of the novel, about a “life waiting…that is very different from what they’ve known, and the concept of family is more far-reaching than they ever could have expected”; it’s a story of H.F. and her best friend Bo’s journey to explore the world beyond the small coal-mining town in which they have grown up, learn about themselves and their place in the world, and return to their home, changed. I suppose that, in a way, Finding H.F. is the quintessential Joseph Campbell-esque hero’s quest in the form of the American road trip infused with GLBT themes. Julia Watt’s writing is engaging, and I could imagine H.F.’s voice in my head thinking her thoughts out loud. Furthermore, while the novel ends hopefully, as children’s books should, it doesn’t downplay the hardships in its characters lives or the lives of those like them. The characters are well-developed, and seem like real people with plausible motivations that one could meet. I think that this novel also succeeds in presenting portraying individuals as complex, avoiding stereotypes about Northerners and Southerners, country folk and city folk, heterosexuals and homosexuals, blacks and whites, religious and non-religious, etc.

Perhaps one of the things that struck me most was the way in which Julia Watts chose the meeting with H.F. and her mother to play out in the end. I think that I would’ve felt cheated if H.F.’s mother really had welcomed her with open arms, or had ended up getting a college education and a good job. That sort of ending would’ve had the hollowness of deus ex machina. Although the ending was sad, it was a complex and realistic portrayal of humans and the cycles in which they are often trapped. Although Finding H.F. does not sugar-coat things, as is evidenced by H.F.’s mother, H.F.’s inability to tell her grandmother about her sexual orientation, and Laney’s disappearance, it does offer hope at the end, the hope that we can all find a place where we belong where people love an understand us.

[Jennie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Watts provides an accurate and entertaining view of gay teenage life in a conservative town. Her use of slang expressions and extensive dialog adds a sense of realism to H.F.’s narration. Also Watts covers issues facing homosexual teens including: isolation from family, loss of identity and homophobia. Watts describes the vicious, and sometimes violent treatment, of gay teens in school.

As a person who was also raised by my grandmother, I related deeply to H.F.’s need to seek out her birth mother. I was ultimately inspired by H.F.’s ability to define herself apart from her dysfunctional parent and find a way to be happy even under oppressive circumstances. Finding H.F. is an excellent choice for GLBTQ teens, as it offers a variety of options. For instance H.F. is extremely distrusting of religion until she finds an inclusive church service. However, other teens in the story are not able to reconcile their orientation with a religious affiliation. My only complaint is certain situations in the novel are coincidental to the point of absurdity. When H.F. and Bo arrive in Atlanta they immediately meet a wandering band of kind gay teenagers with rich older friends. Although this situation drives the plot forward, it seems highly unlikely to occur.

[Margaret · Rating 3 out of 5]

LGBT YA story

This story is about Heavenly Faith, called H. F. by everyone but her grandmother. She knows she likes girls and has a crush on Wendy, daughter of a professor at the college in town. She makes friends with Wendy and at a sleepover, they experiment. Wendy reacts badly and H.F. is devastated. She then finds her mother's address in her grandmother's drawer and feels betrayed. She then talks her bestfriend, Bo, a gay boy, into going to Florida to see her mother. Along the way, they meet other gay teens. When they get to Florida, H.F. finds a mother that is not interested in anything but herself. On the way home, H.F. and Bo find that her mother has stolen their money.

The ending wraps things up a little too easily and neatly, but otherwise an interesting read.

I would not necessarily use this book in a classroom, but as a librarian, it would be a good book to have in the library. It is definitely a high school book. This book was discussed in the article we read.

[Sharon · Rating 3 out of 5]

Julia Watts demonstrates just how far literature for gay youth has come since "Annie on My Mind." H.F. is gay and proud and very aware of it---even if she shies away from telling her ultra-religious grandmother, she successfully pursues a relationship with the rich professor's daughter she has her eye on. A reunion with her mother rang true and was reminiscent of "The Great Gilly Hopkins," while characters H.F. and Bo's perfectly realized small-town, rural backgrounds are vivid enough to help the reader forgive extreme coincidences (like randomly running into gay teens out in the park on a road trip).

[Lydia · Rating 4 out of 5]

Heavenly Faith has been left by her mother to be raised by her devoutly Christian grandmother. As HF realizes she is a lesbian and her best friend Beau is gay, the two form a bond of survival and love. HF is surprised to discover that her mother is not lost, but has been in contact with her grandmother. HF recruits Beau to go on a road trip to talk to her mother.

This is a sad story. I am not a big fan of the southern white trash lesbian with the well-meaning heart of gold who pines for her mother. But, given that, Watts is an excellent writer.

[Jess · Rating 4 out of 5]

Heavenly Faith Simms, known as H.F. to everyone but her grandmother, is a tomboy who likes girls, living in a small town in Kentucky. Her only friend is Bo, a boy who is considered a sissy by the football team and his father. Both of them are different but cannot be open about it for fear of the consequences. When H.F. finds her mother's address, she is certain that she would accept her for who she is. So her and Bo take a journey that will change their lives.

[Sophie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I did like it, but I would have liked it even more if it was developing the emotional side a little bit more and I believe the end is a bit foreseeable, nevertheless, it's a nice read. The only reason it gets four stars out of five is because the characters - although very vividly drawn, could have a little more flesh to them. On the other hand, maybe that's the thing that YA literature should be carefull of - not to do just that too much :)

so anyway, thumbs up on this one :)

[Ellie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I read Finding H.F. just weeks after breaking up with a girl I cared for very deeply. Though the situations had very little in common, this book was a great solace. I identified with H.F.'s background in rural Kentucky, and her internal search for meaning underlying her trip to search for the mother who abandoned her. I cannot recommend this book highly enough.

[Shelby Ann · Rating 3 out of 5]

A wonderful coming-of-age book! For any teen facing problems, you can easily relate to the problems of H.F. and wish her the best through the journey of finding herself. Great read with a plot twist around every corner that will have you thinking, "what will happen next?"

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[Leslie · Rating 2 out of 5]

Other than H.F., I found the characters to be fairly stereotypical. The road trip was not nearly as exciting as it could have been. I did enjoy H.F.'s voice, though and felt the ending was appropriate and not contrived.

[Joshua · Rating 4 out of 5]

Small town adolescence, gay/lesbian identity, road trip. Even some parental abandonment in there. But pretty lighthearted in general, for YA.

[BCPL Youth Services Librarian]

Click to see book in BCPL's online catalog

[Jack · Rating 4 out of 5]

A well-written, funny coming-of-age / road-trip tale set in the rural South.