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The Classics Reclassified In Which Certain Famous Books Are Not So Much Digested As Indigested, Together with Merccifully Brief Biographies of their Authors, a few Unnecessary Footnotes, and Questions
In this book Richard Armour hilariously and irreverantly writes parody of seven famous classical authors and a famous literary character from each of them.
Hardcover
First published January 1, 1960
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117 people want to read
About the author
Richard Armour
150 books38 followersRichard Armour, a college professor of English who specialized in Chaucer and the English Romantic poets, was best known as a prolific author of light verse and wacky parodies of academic scholarship. He was a professor of English at Scripps College in Claremont from 1945 to 1966.
Armour was raised in Pomona, California, where his father owned a drugstore. He graduated from Pomona College, where he was elected to Phi Beta Kappa, then obtained his master's and Ph.D. in English literature at Harvard. He was a Harvard research fellow at the Victoria and Albert Museum library in London.
Armour was raised in Pomona, California, where his father owned a drugstore. He graduated from Pomona College, where he was elected to Phi Beta Kappa, then obtained his master's and Ph.D. in English literature at Harvard. He was a Harvard research fellow at the Victoria and Albert Museum library in London.
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Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews
August 5, 2010
Thanks to this book, I now have conversational knowledge of The Iliad, Juliet Caesar, Ivanhoe, The Scarlet Letter, Moby Dick, Silas Marner and David Copperfield without having ever actually read those books. (Nor does it sound like I would want to read any of them.) And I got a few chuckles as well.
A word to the wise: some of these book summaries are repeated in Armour's later book, It All Started With Freshman English.
A word to the wise: some of these book summaries are repeated in Armour's later book, It All Started With Freshman English.
July 23, 2014
Richard Armour’s résumé is formidable: a Harvard PhD, who held research fellowships in England and France, and taught at a slew of institutions, including the University of Texas, Northwestern University, and the University of Frieburg. When someone like that writes a book, you might be forgiven for imagining it’s on an academic subject.
And so The Classics Reclassified is.
… except that it’s the most hilarious, the most utterly addictive take on an academic subject you could possibly imagine. I’ve read a fair number of Armour’s books and am a diehard fan of his style of humour, but I have had – ever since I first read The Classics Reclassified – a very soft spot for this particular book. This, as the name suggests, is a book about literary classics (with authors ranging from Homer to Shakespeare to Dickens) – but in a way that’s bound to make you see not just these authors but their works too in a different light.
There are seven authors and seven works covered here: Homer (The Iliad); Shakespeare (Julius Caesar); Sir Walter Scott (Ivanhoe); Nathaniel Hawthorne (The Scarlet Letter); Herman Melville (Moby Dick); George Eliot (Silas Marner); and Dickens (David Copperfield). Each section begins with a brief but informative biography of the writer. Homer, for instance, we learn, “…is said to have been born in seven cities, which indicates how his mother kept on the move. He is also said to have been born in six centuries, apparently after a number of false starts.” And, about George Eliot, Armour writes: “George Eliot had a great deal of trouble with her name, and so have librarians ever since… most readers, however, give up after searching for a few hours and read something by, say, Eliot, T.S.” [A footnote follows: “After a few hours with Eliot, T.S, some readers give up reading entirely”].
This deliciously irreverent style is carried forward into Armour’s discussion of each work. Basically, each of these is a synopsis of the work in question, every bit as pithy as the author bios. [And with those nutty footnotes included: “The next day, on the plains of Philippi, the opposing armies are met” – from Julius Caesar – comes, for instance, with this footnote: “By whom, it is never divulged.”] There are hilarious asides, very quick plot lines, and smart little tips [“Unless you are interested in a catalogue of famous pictures of whales, the manufacture of rope lines, the anatomy of the whale’s eye, ear, and tail, how to skin a whale and cook the blubber, and the history of whaling from Perseus to the present, you would do well to turn from Chapter XXXVI to Chapter CXXXIII without further delay, thus saving nearly a hundred chapters without anybody’s knowing the difference if you keep quiet. After all, Ahab isn’t the only one entitled to be a skipper”].
What’s amazing is that Armour’s research and his knowledge of his subject is so obviously impeccable – yet his sense of humour makes this book an absolute gem, the sort of book you can go back to again and again. I end up reading it at least once a year, to the point where I know all the jokes, but still find them delightful. An absolute must-read if you like literature, and you like humour.
P.S. My edition of this book is illustrated by Campbell Grant - and the illustrations are every bit as brilliant as Armour's prose.
And so The Classics Reclassified is.
… except that it’s the most hilarious, the most utterly addictive take on an academic subject you could possibly imagine. I’ve read a fair number of Armour’s books and am a diehard fan of his style of humour, but I have had – ever since I first read The Classics Reclassified – a very soft spot for this particular book. This, as the name suggests, is a book about literary classics (with authors ranging from Homer to Shakespeare to Dickens) – but in a way that’s bound to make you see not just these authors but their works too in a different light.
There are seven authors and seven works covered here: Homer (The Iliad); Shakespeare (Julius Caesar); Sir Walter Scott (Ivanhoe); Nathaniel Hawthorne (The Scarlet Letter); Herman Melville (Moby Dick); George Eliot (Silas Marner); and Dickens (David Copperfield). Each section begins with a brief but informative biography of the writer. Homer, for instance, we learn, “…is said to have been born in seven cities, which indicates how his mother kept on the move. He is also said to have been born in six centuries, apparently after a number of false starts.” And, about George Eliot, Armour writes: “George Eliot had a great deal of trouble with her name, and so have librarians ever since… most readers, however, give up after searching for a few hours and read something by, say, Eliot, T.S.” [A footnote follows: “After a few hours with Eliot, T.S, some readers give up reading entirely”].
This deliciously irreverent style is carried forward into Armour’s discussion of each work. Basically, each of these is a synopsis of the work in question, every bit as pithy as the author bios. [And with those nutty footnotes included: “The next day, on the plains of Philippi, the opposing armies are met” – from Julius Caesar – comes, for instance, with this footnote: “By whom, it is never divulged.”] There are hilarious asides, very quick plot lines, and smart little tips [“Unless you are interested in a catalogue of famous pictures of whales, the manufacture of rope lines, the anatomy of the whale’s eye, ear, and tail, how to skin a whale and cook the blubber, and the history of whaling from Perseus to the present, you would do well to turn from Chapter XXXVI to Chapter CXXXIII without further delay, thus saving nearly a hundred chapters without anybody’s knowing the difference if you keep quiet. After all, Ahab isn’t the only one entitled to be a skipper”].
What’s amazing is that Armour’s research and his knowledge of his subject is so obviously impeccable – yet his sense of humour makes this book an absolute gem, the sort of book you can go back to again and again. I end up reading it at least once a year, to the point where I know all the jokes, but still find them delightful. An absolute must-read if you like literature, and you like humour.
P.S. My edition of this book is illustrated by Campbell Grant - and the illustrations are every bit as brilliant as Armour's prose.
February 1, 2016
I recalled having read this appalling, piece of garbage yesterday while I was reading a "Romola" by George Eliot. The link comes from the fact that the "The Classics Reclassified" contains a rather successful parody of "Silas Marner" of which Armour says that it shows that good people are rewarded for their virtue but that they have to wait a great many years for their reward.
I am rather inclined to think that "Silas Marner" does indeed deserve the unsophisticated mauling that Armour dishes out in this book. However, I must acknowledge that what he was doing was disgraceful. As a university literature professor, Armour's day job would have been to help his students through the difficult and occasionally badly written sections of our great classics. As a sideline he wrote books like this in which he made easy jokes on the problematic aspects of the great books in our Western Canon.
If you enjoyed the parodies found in Mad Magazine and the National Lampoon, you will probably enjoy this slim, efficient volume.
I am rather inclined to think that "Silas Marner" does indeed deserve the unsophisticated mauling that Armour dishes out in this book. However, I must acknowledge that what he was doing was disgraceful. As a university literature professor, Armour's day job would have been to help his students through the difficult and occasionally badly written sections of our great classics. As a sideline he wrote books like this in which he made easy jokes on the problematic aspects of the great books in our Western Canon.
If you enjoyed the parodies found in Mad Magazine and the National Lampoon, you will probably enjoy this slim, efficient volume.
August 28, 2009
Not quite as hilarious as when I read it as a child, this retelling of five "classics" still got a good number of giggles out of me. In the same vein as 1066 and All That, Richard Armour's parodies of textbook biographies, summaries of major texts, and study questions are actually edifying as well as entertaining.
April 21, 2011
Very funny book. Or should I say very punny? Seven famous books are discussed, with "mercifully brief biographies of their authors." Quizzes after each chapter, just to make sure you got it all. The footnotes are admittedly unnecessary, but how could we do without them? With illustrations as bizarre as the text.
January 4, 2023
Read “The Iliad” lately?
Yep, it is time for me to be exposed to culture so I thought I would go see a classic (Troy "Brad Pitt".) but first I need to know a little about the story and the Author. Therefore, I turned to my trusty reference, "The Classics Reclassified" by Richard Armour.
My copy must have been written about the time of Homer, as it has no ISBN.
This volume helps one understand the classics in a way that can be appreciated. It is refreshing to read a book by someone that had made the learning experience so palatable. (No, I did not eat the book.)
Richard Armour starts with a succinct and to-the-point biography of the classic writer. He makes clear what other books only imply. After this, he follows up with the classic, itself. Sometimes I am not sure if I should believe him.
The contents:
Homer
The Iliad "From the original Greek, whoever he was"
William Shakespeare
Julius Caesar "et tu, William"
Sir Walter Scott
Ivanhoe "upright knights, tilting and toppling"
Nathaniel Hawthorne
The Scarlet Letter "an A for effort"
Herman Melville
Moby Dick "strong men cry and whales’ blubber"
George Eliot
Silas Marner "a moral with a tale"
Charles Dickens
David Copperfield's "or up from poverty"
The book also contains sketches at relevant or irreverent intervals.
Yep, it is time for me to be exposed to culture so I thought I would go see a classic (Troy "Brad Pitt".) but first I need to know a little about the story and the Author. Therefore, I turned to my trusty reference, "The Classics Reclassified" by Richard Armour.
My copy must have been written about the time of Homer, as it has no ISBN.
This volume helps one understand the classics in a way that can be appreciated. It is refreshing to read a book by someone that had made the learning experience so palatable. (No, I did not eat the book.)
Richard Armour starts with a succinct and to-the-point biography of the classic writer. He makes clear what other books only imply. After this, he follows up with the classic, itself. Sometimes I am not sure if I should believe him.
The contents:
Homer
The Iliad "From the original Greek, whoever he was"
William Shakespeare
Julius Caesar "et tu, William"
Sir Walter Scott
Ivanhoe "upright knights, tilting and toppling"
Nathaniel Hawthorne
The Scarlet Letter "an A for effort"
Herman Melville
Moby Dick "strong men cry and whales’ blubber"
George Eliot
Silas Marner "a moral with a tale"
Charles Dickens
David Copperfield's "or up from poverty"
The book also contains sketches at relevant or irreverent intervals.
July 30, 2018
The specific classics let in for the Armour treatment here are:
The Iliad
Julius Caesar
Ivanhoe
The Scarlet Letter
Moby-Dick or, The Whale
Silas Marner
David Copperfield
And what is the Armour treatment? It's finishing the line "...Achilles has no choice but to `draw his keen blade from his thigh'" with the footnote, "A lesser man would have used a scabbard." And then setting discussion questions like this: "Hester is said to have made her living with her needle. Did she give inoculations on the side? If not on the side, in the arm?"
The Iliad
Julius Caesar
Ivanhoe
The Scarlet Letter
Moby-Dick or, The Whale
Silas Marner
David Copperfield
And what is the Armour treatment? It's finishing the line "...Achilles has no choice but to `draw his keen blade from his thigh'" with the footnote, "A lesser man would have used a scabbard." And then setting discussion questions like this: "Hester is said to have made her living with her needle. Did she give inoculations on the side? If not on the side, in the arm?"
May 27, 2021
As someone that has read many of the classics, including five of the seven mentioned here, I appreciate the role they have played in the human literary experience. Therefore, there were many times when I found the spoof-like jokes disconcerting.
The seven classics modified and occasionally mangled in this book are: The Iliad, Julius Caesar, Ivanhoe, The Scarlet Letter, Moby Dick, Silas Marner and David Copperfield. While some of the wordplay is humorous, for example there is the “question:” “In Shakespeare’s plays have you noticed how soothsayers always say the sooth, the whole sooth and nothing but the sooth?” Others are nonsensical: “Would Brutus have been quite so casual about seeing the ghost of Caesar if he had read ‘Hamlet’ and ‘Macbeth?’”
I will concede that spoofing classic literature is a hard task. What is done here reaches only to the lowest rungs of that particular ladder.
The seven classics modified and occasionally mangled in this book are: The Iliad, Julius Caesar, Ivanhoe, The Scarlet Letter, Moby Dick, Silas Marner and David Copperfield. While some of the wordplay is humorous, for example there is the “question:” “In Shakespeare’s plays have you noticed how soothsayers always say the sooth, the whole sooth and nothing but the sooth?” Others are nonsensical: “Would Brutus have been quite so casual about seeing the ghost of Caesar if he had read ‘Hamlet’ and ‘Macbeth?’”
I will concede that spoofing classic literature is a hard task. What is done here reaches only to the lowest rungs of that particular ladder.
June 21, 2025
Sadly, I had to DNF this book. I can see that this book was meant to be a spoof of the original classics: Homer's The Iliad, William Shakespeare's Julius Caesar, Sir Walter Scott's Ivanhoe, Nathaniel Hawthorne's The Scarlet Letter, Herman Melville's Moby Dick, George Eliot's Silas Marner, and Charles Dickens's David Copperfield. Unfortunately, it was done in poor taste and it came out as an incoherent mess.
June 6, 2020
For those who like their literary analyses full of puns, this is the books for you. Some of the jokes may be dated, but still a fun read.
October 3, 2022
3.5 stars
Droll, but rather dull at times. When it's funny, is has a sort of Dave Barry-esque spin to its humor
When not being funny, the writing is incredibly dry.
Droll, but rather dull at times. When it's funny, is has a sort of Dave Barry-esque spin to its humor
When not being funny, the writing is incredibly dry.
December 21, 2024
The Book Description
In this fun little book, English Professor Richard Armour offers up irreverent retellings of various classics, including The Iliad, Julius Caesar, Ivanhoe, The Scarlet Letter, Moby Dick, Silas Marner and David Copperfield. He also includes brief biographies of the authors. At the end of each book description, he includes a short little quiz on what you’ve “learned.” The whole thing is 132 pages but averages at least 3.5 chuckles per page.
Why I Liked It
My copy (published in 1960) was my dad’s, and I remember reading it over and over again when I was younger. After he passed away in August, my mom asked us if we wanted any of my dad’s books to remember him by. When I saw this one on the shelves, it was like seeing an old friend. Not only did it remind me of my dad, it reminded me of my childhood. Upon rereading it recently, it was exactly as I remembered it and just as enjoyable.
I think this book is a great companion piece when reading any of these classic tales. Armour has a light touch, a wonderful sense of sarcasm, and a deft wit—skewering the classics in a way that is both educational and amusing. I suspect that reading this book is about 85.9% more fun than reading the actual classics it “reclassifies.”
I’ve been thinking of this book lately as I’ve watched Ti and her fellow readers struggle through Moby Dick. I thought it would be fun to excerpt some of the passages from the book related to Moby Dick as a little gift to Ti and the others (and to provide a feel for the tone of the book). This little gem of a book is a fine addition to any library and a great way to enjoy the classics in a light-hearted way.
SOME EXCERPTS:
We seem about to be introduced to this Captain Ahab in Chapter XXII, but Melville, not wanting to rush things, elects at this point to give an account of the history and literature of whaling. Of course you knew all along that Louis XIV outfitted several whaling ships at his own expense, that Alfred the Great wrote the first narrative of a whaling voyage, and that the grandmother of Benjamin Franklin was Mary Folger, who had something or other to do with the whaling industry. Nevertheless, you are grateful to be reminded of these facts, and the story can wait.
Unless you are interested in a catalogue of famous pictures of whales, the manufacture of rope lines, the anatomy of a whale’s eye, ear and tail, how to skin a whale and cook the blubber, and the history of whaling from Perseus to the present, you would do well to turn from Chapter XXXVI to Chapter CXXXIII without delay, thus saving nearly a hundred chapters without anybody’s knowing the different if you keep quiet. After all, Ahab isn’t the only one entitled to be a skipper.
It should be added that the whole story is full of allegory and symbolism. Ahab stands for something, the sea stands for something, and Moby Dick, as we have already pointed out, stands for something. The reader has to stand for quite a bit, too.
From Questions on Moby Dick:
3. How does a whaler demonstrate how big the one was that got away?
7. Do you realize how much information you have picked up about whales? Has this made you any happier and better adjusted?
In this fun little book, English Professor Richard Armour offers up irreverent retellings of various classics, including The Iliad, Julius Caesar, Ivanhoe, The Scarlet Letter, Moby Dick, Silas Marner and David Copperfield. He also includes brief biographies of the authors. At the end of each book description, he includes a short little quiz on what you’ve “learned.” The whole thing is 132 pages but averages at least 3.5 chuckles per page.
Why I Liked It
My copy (published in 1960) was my dad’s, and I remember reading it over and over again when I was younger. After he passed away in August, my mom asked us if we wanted any of my dad’s books to remember him by. When I saw this one on the shelves, it was like seeing an old friend. Not only did it remind me of my dad, it reminded me of my childhood. Upon rereading it recently, it was exactly as I remembered it and just as enjoyable.
I think this book is a great companion piece when reading any of these classic tales. Armour has a light touch, a wonderful sense of sarcasm, and a deft wit—skewering the classics in a way that is both educational and amusing. I suspect that reading this book is about 85.9% more fun than reading the actual classics it “reclassifies.”
I’ve been thinking of this book lately as I’ve watched Ti and her fellow readers struggle through Moby Dick. I thought it would be fun to excerpt some of the passages from the book related to Moby Dick as a little gift to Ti and the others (and to provide a feel for the tone of the book). This little gem of a book is a fine addition to any library and a great way to enjoy the classics in a light-hearted way.
SOME EXCERPTS:
We seem about to be introduced to this Captain Ahab in Chapter XXII, but Melville, not wanting to rush things, elects at this point to give an account of the history and literature of whaling. Of course you knew all along that Louis XIV outfitted several whaling ships at his own expense, that Alfred the Great wrote the first narrative of a whaling voyage, and that the grandmother of Benjamin Franklin was Mary Folger, who had something or other to do with the whaling industry. Nevertheless, you are grateful to be reminded of these facts, and the story can wait.
Unless you are interested in a catalogue of famous pictures of whales, the manufacture of rope lines, the anatomy of a whale’s eye, ear and tail, how to skin a whale and cook the blubber, and the history of whaling from Perseus to the present, you would do well to turn from Chapter XXXVI to Chapter CXXXIII without delay, thus saving nearly a hundred chapters without anybody’s knowing the different if you keep quiet. After all, Ahab isn’t the only one entitled to be a skipper.
It should be added that the whole story is full of allegory and symbolism. Ahab stands for something, the sea stands for something, and Moby Dick, as we have already pointed out, stands for something. The reader has to stand for quite a bit, too.
From Questions on Moby Dick:
3. How does a whaler demonstrate how big the one was that got away?
7. Do you realize how much information you have picked up about whales? Has this made you any happier and better adjusted?
August 14, 2016
There's something hilarious and quotable in nearly every paragraph, and that's not counting the footnotes, illustrations, and suggestions for further discussion. Plus, this book taught me everything I know about Ivanhoe and Silas Marner.
These are affectionate parodies, from someone who clearly loved literature. This book made me more curious about the subjects, and told me that we shouldn't revere Great Books so much that we can't enjoy them.
Some samples:
On The Illiad: "Then bronze-harnessed Hector drops in on his dear-won wife, even white-armed Andromache, 'daughter of great-hearted Eëtion that dwelt beneath wooded Plakos, and was king of the men of Kilikia.' (Homer wants us to be sure not to confuse her with all the other Andromaches we know.)"
On Julius Caesar: "The opening scene is in Rome: A Street. A Street is presumably just north of B Street."
On Ivanhoe: "The dastardly Front-de-Boeuf and his dastardly friends are interrupted in their dastardly pursuits by the sound of someone winding a horn (Scott's horns always seem to be running down) in the nearby forest."
On The Scarlet Letter: "After a year or so, Hester had grown tired of waiting and had given birth to a child. There was strong suspicion that she had had an accomplice."
On Moby Dick: "Melville had no formal education after the age of fifteen, again showing how important it is not to be educated if you wish to become a famous writer."
On Silas Marner: "It may take a little time, say thirty or forty years, but virtue will be rewarded, sinfulness will be punished, and everyone who hasn't already died a tragic death will live happily ever after."
On David Copperfield: "David Copperfield is told in the first person. Singular, isn't it?"
These are affectionate parodies, from someone who clearly loved literature. This book made me more curious about the subjects, and told me that we shouldn't revere Great Books so much that we can't enjoy them.
Some samples:
On The Illiad: "Then bronze-harnessed Hector drops in on his dear-won wife, even white-armed Andromache, 'daughter of great-hearted Eëtion that dwelt beneath wooded Plakos, and was king of the men of Kilikia.' (Homer wants us to be sure not to confuse her with all the other Andromaches we know.)"
On Julius Caesar: "The opening scene is in Rome: A Street. A Street is presumably just north of B Street."
On Ivanhoe: "The dastardly Front-de-Boeuf and his dastardly friends are interrupted in their dastardly pursuits by the sound of someone winding a horn (Scott's horns always seem to be running down) in the nearby forest."
On The Scarlet Letter: "After a year or so, Hester had grown tired of waiting and had given birth to a child. There was strong suspicion that she had had an accomplice."
On Moby Dick: "Melville had no formal education after the age of fifteen, again showing how important it is not to be educated if you wish to become a famous writer."
On Silas Marner: "It may take a little time, say thirty or forty years, but virtue will be rewarded, sinfulness will be punished, and everyone who hasn't already died a tragic death will live happily ever after."
On David Copperfield: "David Copperfield is told in the first person. Singular, isn't it?"
October 29, 2013
This book was a very entertaining trip through many of the books students (unwillingly) read in their English classes. Whether I loved or hated the original, I found Armour's "retelling" of each tale too fun to keep to myself: I read whole chapters aloud to my poor, unsuspecting daughter. (She enjoyed them, too--but don't tell anyone.) This book will be enjoyed most by folks who are familiar with the original classics.
June 4, 2009
I have enjoyed the "classics", but I have also enjoyed having fun at thier expense. In this satire, certain famous books are " not so much digested but ingested". Not a book that produced loud laughter, but a smile as I understood the fun.
January 22, 2019
Wonderfully insightful plays on words describe several of the books most required for reading: Scarlet Letter, Moby-Dick, David Copperfield, The Iliad (Achilles sulks all the way through), Ivanhoe, and Silas Marner (heart and cache of gold).
December 20, 2012
This one was much to close to Armour's scholarly work to be as funny as his historical [histerical] studies. Reminded me of all those books I had to read, but didn't, while in school. In my case I would add "Crime and Punishment."
September 18, 2015
My giggles started before the actual book with "Dedicated to that amazing device, the Required Reading List, better even than artificial respiration for keeping dead authors alive" and didn't really stop until the end. Some of the asides are showing their age, but for the most part a fun read.
December 5, 2012
This is a hilarious romp through the great classics of literature. More fun than that a barrel of monkeys!
March 10, 2019
No one tops Richard Armour at summarizing hilariously anything. . . This book took on some of the classics. From Homer to Dickens he considers both the artist and a main work. . .too funny!!
Displaying 1 - 20 of 20 reviews