Better Than Normal: How What Makes You Different Can Make You Exceptional

by Dale Archer

A New York Times Bestseller

A groundbreaking new view of human psychology that shows how eight key traits of human behavior—long perceived as liabilities—can be important hidden strengths.

What if the inattentiveness that makes school or work a challenge holds the secret to your future as an entrepreneur? What if the shyness in groups that you hate is the source of deep compassion for others? What if the anxiety and nervousness you often feel can actually help energize you? What if the mood swings you sometimes experience can
be the source of tremendous creativity?

Renowned psychiatrist and popular on-air personality Dr. Dale Archer believes that labels for behavior like “ADHD,” “bipolar,” and “OCD” are normal human qualities—and contends that we all experience these and other psychological traits to some extent, yet fail to leverage the significant advantages they can offer. Worse, we stigmatize one another for these prevalent, widely shared aspects of our personalities.

In Better Than Normal, Dr. Archer offers an empowering framework for redefining what constitutes mental health. Drawing on his twenty years of clinical experience, he describes eight traits of human behavior—heretofore known
only as psychiatric diagnoses. Each of these occurs along a continuum rather than as a simple on-off switch (where “off ” means we’re fine, and “on” means we’ve got a problem). These are the aspects of our personality that we worry about the most, but these are also the very things that make us distinctive and different.

According to Dr. Archer, each of us has a unique personality that emerges from our hardwired genetics and individual life experiences. With Better Than Normal, you can map your individual characteristics by taking the eight trait
self-assessment quiz and see how what makes you different can indeed make you exceptional. Filled with engaging anecdotes and practical tools to help you capitalize on your unique characteristics, Better Than Normal offers a new and liberating way to look at ourselves and others.

Genres: Psychology, Nonfiction, Self Help, Audiobook, Adhd, Science, Ebooks

256 pages, Hardcover

First published January 1, 2012

About the author

Dr. Dale Archer is a Medical Doctor, board-certified Psychiatrist and Distinguished Fellow of the American Psychiatric Association who has helped thousands of patients in his private practice for more than two decades.

Dr. Archer was born in New Orleans, Louisiana. As a Tulane Scholar and Phi Beta Kappa, he received his BA in Philosophy with honors, and continued at Tulane where he received his M.D. from the School of Medicine. Dr. Archer attended The University of Texas in San Antonio for his internship in Internal Medicine and while there found his calling and completed his Residency in Psychiatry.

In 1988, he founded The Institute for Neuropsychiatry in Lake Charles, Louisiana, a clinic which now staffs 6 psychiatrists and multiple psychologists, therapists and nurse practitioners, who all treat a wide variety of mental health issues. Dr. Archer considers himself a 'General Psychiatrist' and feels that the vast specialization that has occurred within the field misses the point that all human behavior is connected and that to treat one problem without assessing all aspects of the individual has only a limited chance for success. He coined the term ‘continuum theory of mental illness’ which states that psychiatric diagnoses don’t come with an on-off switch, where off is normal and on is, you have a mental illness. Rather, these traits occur on a continuum from 1 (none of the trait) to 10 (super dominant trait) and this will dictate whether treatment is needed and to what degree.

He has had a private psychiatric practice for over twenty years, served as the medical director at various times for adolescent, adult and geriatric inpatient units, worked as a prison psychiatrist, served as an expert witness in many criminal court cases and was the corporate medical director for a 20 facility Addiction treatment group.

He is now the Medical Director for psychiatric services at Lake Charles Memorial Hospital and is the psychiatric consultant for the SW Louisiana Crisis Intervention Training (CIT) program which trains police officers in how to recognize and deal with mental illness. Recently he was appointed by the Governor to serve on the Louisiana Medical Advisory Board.

Dr. Archer is a media veteran with over two decades of experience. He started a weekly mental illness news segment at the Lake Charles NBC affiliate in 1988. He has had three successful radio shows, including the very popular call-in show "Taking Charge with Dr. Dale Archer” and a regional and internet based TV talk show, "The Dr. Dale Archer Show". He has appeared on most of the top national news shows talking about various psychological issues related to current events.

Dr. Archer has authored several articles, as well as the book Chemical Imbalance Depression. He currently writes "Taking Charge”, an advice column now syndicated nationally in numerous magazines and newspapers. His new book, a NY Times Best Seller Better Than Normal: How What Makes You Different Can Make You Exceptional (Random House), will redefine our perceptions of what REALLY constitutes a mental illness

In January 2009, he launched DrDaleArcher.com a free, internet-based psychological advice and blog website that combines common sense guidance and medical expertise.

He now splits his time between Louisiana and New York City and continues to pursue his two primary missions: Dispensing free advice online to those in need and dispelling the myths and stigmas that surround mental illness.


from http://drdalearcher.com/about

Reviews

[Laurie · Rating 4 out of 5]

Dr. Archer is a psychiatrist with a lot of achievements. He founded the Institute for Neuropyschiatry and the psychiatric program at a hospital. He runs a free advice website, DrDaleArcher. He makes numerous television appearances. He was also a professional poker player.

Wait, what?

Dr. Archer, who has designed a system of eight human behavior traits with a scale of 1 to ‘over 10’ to describe people, is high on the ‘adventurous’ or ADHD scale. This means he has a lot of energy (he puts in an incredible amount of hours at his various jobs), he doesn’t like to get bogged down doing one thing, and he is always looking for new challenges. ADHD is normally thought of as a disorder; he is obviously using it to his advantage.

The author’s theory is that everyone has at least a little bit of all of the 8 traits- adventurous (ADHD), perfectionist (OCD), shy (social anxiety disorder), hyper-alert (generalized anxiety disorder), dramatic (histrionic), self-focused (Narcissistic), high energy (bipolar), and magical (schizophrenia)- in varying amounts. He also feels that as long as you are functional, having those traits is not a disorder but can be used as a strength. It’s when you go over 10 and become nonfunctional that the problems arise; a high energy person can do tremendous things as long as they don’t become so very high energy that a psychotic break occurs and they flip into full on mania. A perfectionist is great for detailed projects as long as they aren’t spending all their time trying to perfect something that is already perfect. A little bit of perfectionist makes us do a better job. People who are high in any particular trait should not be considered to have a mental illness unless they it is hurting them or their family.

Archer devotes a chapter to each trait and shows us examples of how the trait can hurt a person as well as things they will probably do well at. A shy person will make a miserable public speaker, while a dramatic person will be happy doing it. A high energy person will hate being in a cubicle. A person who has no outstandingly high scores in any of the traits can probably fit into most jobs easily.

The author’s basic thesis is “Make the best of who you are”. Take the questionnaires and see where you stand (and take them every now and then, because even basic traits like these change over time). You might be able to make some changes in your life that could make you happier or more productive.

I think Archer has some good ideas here. A person shouldn’t be pathologized just because their personality isn’t average. The concept of each trait appearing on a continuum rather than being simply there or not there is very appealing and sensible. I don’t think the book is very deep one, but I think it will help people. The author is like a cheerleader; I can picture him bouncing around on a stage, exhorting people to make the most of themselves. I suspect there may be eye rolling from some psychiatrists as people announce that they have diagnosed themselves using the questionnaires, but really, the more a person knows about himself the better off he is.

[Heidi Wiechert · Rating 3 out of 5]

I completely agree with Dr. Archer's basic premise which is: Americans are over-diagnosed, over-medicated, and perhaps we need to re-examine our definition of "normal" to fit reality rather than a dreamworld that exists only in our heavily fogged, prescription filled minds. He takes apart eight different, commonly diagnosed "disorders" and demonstrates not only their strengths, but also why many of them were necessary for survival. He doesn't deny that many of these mental health problems, at their extreme end, make life unlivable, but stresses that if you're functioning and not a danger to yourself or others, then to embrace your quirks rather than medicate them away.

I thought that all of his descriptions were spot on except for the chapter about "Magical Thinking/Schizophrenia". I guess it's difficult for me to see schizophrenia as existing on a continuum. It seems to me as if you are either schizophrenic or you're not, but I'm committing the error that Dr. Archer warns us about in the beginning of the book. It's usually not an on/off situation when it comes to mental health and perhaps I'm biased towards folks suffering from that particular diagnosis. But anyway, I had a hard time with that chapter.

This isn't a heavy duty tome of psychology, it reads more like pop culture self help. "You are who you are." "Know thyself." It's not earth shattering revelations, but Dr. Archer's advice does have value. I've known so many introverts who, through societal pressures, are convinced that they need to change who they are to fit in, succeed, or excel. They drink heavily at events because they're desperately uncomfortable in crowds or they run home at the end of the work day and shut themselves in their rooms to "de-tox" from the day, as it were. How much better would their quality of life be if they could find a job where their natural predisposition could be embraced rather than shoe-horned into another shape, determined by their environmental rather than their internal preferences. That's what Better Than Normal is all about.

If you enjoyed this book, you may also like 10% Happier by Dan Harris or Embracing Change by Louise Hay. Harris goes for a more analytical view of the self help industry while Hay pushes a new age vibe. Both are helpful in their own way for the reader who is looking for a different way of being in the world and relating to oneself- kind of like this book.

[Kim Mcnelly · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a great book to read if you have to deal with people, EVER!

So many people are seeing their doctors about physiological issues and it's gotten out of control. This book teaches you how to deal with your own personality traits and those of others.

They also include a self test that shows you on a 1-10 scale, where you fall in the categories. You should take the test before you read the book and you will have a good understanding of where you fall!

The 8 topics they cover are:
1. ADHD
2. OCD
3. Social Anxiety Disorder
4. Generalized Anxiety Disorder
5. Histrionic
6. Narcissistic
7. Bi-Polar
8. Schizophrenic

[Terri · Rating 5 out of 5]

Even Dr. Dale Archer's introduction to his book had me hooked, you know, the part we all usually skip.

Archer's premise is that while there are definitely some people in need of clinical help and medication for mental health, many people simply do not need that sort of intervention. Not only have we destigmatized mental illness, we have completely swung in the opposite direction; we glamorize it.

Archer contends that the people labeled "normal" is getting dangerously low. "In fact, it's reached the point where 26 percent of Americans are considered to have one or more diagnosable mental health disorders. The only word for that is ludicrous... If the brains of one quarter of the U.S. population are disordered, then something is very, very wrong with the human mind. Or with our society." Archer does not believe that's the case.

Everyone seems to be diagnosing and being diagnosed with some sort of disorder- The child bored in school has ADHD, well organized? OCD, get excited about things? manic, okay with who you are? narcissist, moods shift frequently? bipoloar. And we all seem to be celebrating and announcing all our illnesses like being ill is the best part of us.

As soon as we label a child, ADHD for example, we are telling that child that they are mentally ill, they are broken, they need excuses. And the child picks up on that. Dr. Archer says maybe we should take a step back and try to work with their bent, allow the strong habitual traits to shape them for good. We need to embrace the traits that make us different from one another and not quickly diagnose those differences as an illness. Medication should be the last resort to our mental health puzzle.

Rather than telling people with strong personality traits that they are mentally ill we need to begin taking those very traits and seeing the positive aspects of the trait. Archer narrows these behavioral traits to eight (positive first followed by diagnostic illness):

1. Adventurous/ ADHD
2. Perfectionist/ OCD
3. Shy/ Social Anxiety Disorder
4. Anxious/ Generalized Anxiety Disorder
5. Dramatic/ Histrionic
6. Self-Focused/ Narcissistic
7. High Energy/ Bipolar
8. Magical/ Schizophrenia

And all of them eventually lead to the common cold of psychiatry- depression.

A few decades ago ADHD was known as 'adventurous,' 'full of energy;' now we drug children who display these traits. "I'm thinking about kids who are like Calvin from the comic strip Calvin and Hobbes, who seems to spend most of his class time in outer space, in the future, or in the Juarassic era. Or like Mark Twain's hero Huckleberry Finn, who was forced to study spelling for an hour every day." Why would we take overly energetic kids, Archer wonders, and drug them up? The reason seems to be that we would like all children to be able to sit in a chair at his desk for six hours in a room with thirty other children and carefully, diligently consider his studies.

Archer puts this disorder into a better light and explains that, "these people are passionate, curious, and energetic. They are great multi-taskers and extraordinary explorers. They excel in times of challenge..." Let these children loose, often, to go explore, run, climb. Of course that's a little difficult in a schoolroom of thirty. What to do?

Concerning OCD he says that the idea that increased perfectionism leads directly to an impaired life is absurd. A relatively small number of people are actually impaired by this trait. This sort of person will probably not be a good story writer because the tendency to get bogged down in both the grammatical details and just exactly what they are trying to say will eventually lead to failure. More often these are the people who can orchestrate a large museum exhibition or a convention for a large group, organizing all the little details that will make the event a success; they build airplanes and do intricate time consuming jobs.

Dr. Archer takes every one of the eight traits and details the positive habits and gives solid examples for careers based on those strengths.

At the back of the book is a test that you should take and then tuck into the book before you read. Refer to it as you read each of the eight behavioral traits. I was dangerously close to needing meds on two of the traits but I'm just going to channel all that for good.

Dr. Archer does not dismiss the behavioral disorders that are illnesses and do need treatment. In fact at every turn he restates that if a person is truly mentally, behaviorally ill, that person should seek help, should take his medication. But for the majority of the U.S. we need to enjoy the diversity of personalities and marvel at what certain traits produce for our society. We need to consider that we are unique first and then with the truly ill, give them the help they need.

In short, this book celebrates our individuality and makes it okay to be a little quirky.

The one thing that I totally skimmed over was the explanation of these traits based on Stone Age evolution; that was far fetched. You know, the whole, "back in Neanderthal times this trait was a real asset because Ono, the adventurous/ADHD, could be out thumping things on the head while the shy sort stayed in the cave..." That little section was just unnecessary stretching of the imagination. But I didn't score high on Magical/ Schizophrenia.

[Greg Nybo · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a fun book with good insights into personality characteristics and how they can all be beneficial. It was a really fun read.

[Suélen Fernandes · Rating 4 out of 5]

4,5
por mais psiquiatras que sejam contra ficar enfiando remédio guela a baixo pra qualquer sinal de psicopatologia

[Feng Ouyang · Rating 2 out of 5]

Overall: the general theme is that mild “personality disorders” are natural and useful. We should not suppress it. Instead, we should choose our career, personal relationship and activities in consideration of our unique personalities. For most people, the personality tests will land in the middle and one cannot gain much practical help from the book. However, the mindset is interesting and reaffirming for people who feel his does not fit in. The writing is too formulated (each chapter with the same format). It’s easy to follow but boring. One read just the first and last chapters and get more than 50% the benefit.



1. Introduction
a. Psychological problems are over diagnosed, over treated and over medicated today.
b. A lot of what we consider psychological disorder could actually be normal personality traits that makes us special and give advantage to us.
c. Everyone has a dominant trait. If this trait is too strong, it could be a psychological problem. However, if it is mild, it’s just a personality trait.
d. Eight personality traits
i. These eight traits are selected as follows
ii. They are all identified as psychological issues in psychiatry practice.
iii. They are the main traits, and includes other psychiatric problems as sub-classes.
iv. They are shown to be connected to genes, and therefore are generic.
v. We don’t include symptoms such as drug addiction, which are really disease rather than traits.
2. Adventure and ADHD
a. Main characteristics of this trait: high energy, less focus, restless, multitasking, jumpy thoughts
b. ADHS diagnosis has increased rapidly in recent years. A lot of children are medicated to make them “fit in” in “normal” settings.
c. Adaptation strategies other than psychological and psychiatric treatments:
i. ADHD kids can be difficult to manage in classroom. But they are also fun, humorous, and inspiring with their energy level.
ii. Join sport activities to burn off energies
iii. Inspire by biographies of explorers and adventurists
iv. Allow for different study styles, such as multi-tasking, playing music when doing homework, etc.
v. Have more outdoor activities to satisfy sensory needs
d. Workplace
i. These people may find it hard to do most of the routine work.
ii. However, they can be very creative and good at starting businesses and innovation.
iii. Their high energy level and ability of multitasking means they can get more done.
iv. They need to be independent and choose the best way to work for themselves.
e. Personal relationship
i. They are fun and humorous, good company.
ii. It is difficult for them to settle down. They may want to frequently change life styles, or do a lot of traveling.
iii. It’s best if they are paired with “shy” people, who can enjoy being alone, when they are out doing adventures.
3. Perfectionism and OCD
a. Characteristics of OCD: obsessive: cannot get the thought out of mind. Compulsive: feel you must do something to address the thought. Typical OCD is related to germ, fire, and organization of objects.
b. A low level of OCD is the same as perfectionist. You pay much attention to details and are bothered if something is not done right. It can be debilitating in some situations. You may never finish the work but keep “improving”.
c. Professions
i. Perfectionism can be advantageous. It produces higher quality of work and reduces the possibility of errors.
ii. You should find a profession where the standard is clearly set. For example, mechanics have a clearly defined tolerance. However, a writer can keep improving his work without end.
d. Personal life
i. When perfectionism is debilitating, use the 3R strategy
1. Recognize: realize that the obsession is happening
2. Reorganize: look at positive factors, instead of the negative resulting from imperfection. For example, when you shop for a camera, think about the joy that a camera can bring you, instead of the consequences of selecting the wrong one to buy.
3. Redirect: engage in interesting activities, to direct your thoughts away from the obsession.
ii. Partner with people who don’t care about details. Let them make unimportant decisions to move forward.
4. Vigilance and Anxiety
a. Anxiety has survival advantages: alert, intuitive and perceptive.
b. However, it may be functionally and physically harmful in modern world, because there are too many triggers.
c. Before trying to deal with it in mindset, you should check out your physical conditions such as hormone levels, which may be the cause of anxiety. Exercises and yoga may help, as well.
d. Choose a carrier that cater to your strength: something that requires attention to details and solution to unexpected problems. But don’t let the demand of alertness overwhelm you.
e. Work and live with partners who are calm and organized. So they can refocus you to the big picture before you lose control.
5. Dramatic and Histrionic
a. These people experience and express strong emotions.
b. They also value attention and praise from others.
c. Histrionic disorder does not seem to be associated with any genes or heritable traits currently. However, it plays essential cultural role. Dramatic and charismatic people play important roles in any society.
d. For profession, acting is a good outlet for dramatic energy. Not only dramatic energy makes you more successful in acting and performing arts, such professions also releases your pressure so you become more “normal” in daily live.
e. Other career choices: lawer (story telling ability), business/sales (personal charm), business leaders (value of personal relationships)
f. For personal relationship, dramatic people tend to attract each other. However, partnership with people with more stable emotional states may be more productive.
6. Self-focus and Narcissistic
a. Characteristics: high self image, motivated, confident, need admiration and praise, self-centered.
b. Narcissistic is a spectrum. At the low end are people who are insecure and easily crushed by failure. On the high end are people who are arrogant and self-centered. At the extreme high end are criminals.
c. Self-focus can be a positive force:
i. Energetic, charismatic and inspiring, can be effective leaders.
ii. Confident to take on challenges, even when the odd is against you.
iii. Highly motivated.
d. Negative side:
i. Sense of entitlement
ii. Hard to get along with, don’t pay attention to the feeling of others
iii. From self-focused to self-absorbed.
7. Impulsive and bipolar
a. Have periods of high energy and low energy, mood swing from hyper-active to depressed.
b. Keep log and observation to make the best use of high-energy periods.
c. Advantage of medium-level bipolar:
i. Creative: high-energy spurs creativity. Mood swings enable you to experience a wide spectrum of emotions. Many artists are bipolar.
ii. Exploratory: have keen interests and willing to take risks.
iii. Good personal relationship: interesting and passionate. But should tell people close to you about your mood swing tendency.
d. Severer bipolar can be debilitating or even dangerous. Medical treatments are necessary and effective.
8. Magical and Schizophrenia
a. Schizophrenia is one of the most serious psychiatric conditions. It also carries a lot of stigma in culture.
b. However, Schizophrenia also has a spectrum. On the low end are the extremely rational people. In the middle are people with imagination and are willing to take a leap of faith. At the high end are people divorced from reality.
c. Mild Schizophrenia (magical thinking) arries advantages
i. Imaginative: willing to let thoughts go beyond reality.
ii. Faith: willing to believe things that are not proven.
iii. Intuitive: willing to trust your own feelings although you don’t know the reason.
iv. Love and romantic: this is basically a leap of faith.
v. Empathetic: in tune with other’s feelings.
d. Matical thinkers are flexible in personal relationship. They can get along well with a variety of personalities.
9. Conclusion:
a. Everyone is different. Nobody is normal. As long as we are safe and productive, we don’t need to “correct” our uniqueness or take medicine for that. Instead, we should use our abnormality to our advantage.
b. Close self-monitoring is valuable because our personality changes with situations and life stages.

[Sharon · Rating 2 out of 5]

A groundbreaking new view of human psychology that shows how eight key traits of human behavior—long perceived as liabilities—can be important hidden strengths.

What if the inattentiveness that makes school or work a challenge holds the secret to your future as an entrepreneur? What if the shyness in groups that you hate is the source of deep compassion for others? What if the anxiety and nervousness you often feel can actually help energize you? What if the mood swings you sometimes experience can
be the source of tremendous creativity?

Renowned psychiatrist and popular on-air personality Dr. Dale Archer believes that labels for behavior like “ADHD,” “bipolar,” and “OCD” are normal human qualities—and contends that we all experience these and other psychological traits to some extent, yet fail to leverage the significant advantages they can offer. Worse, we stigmatize one another for these prevalent, widely shared aspects of our personalities.

In Better Than Normal, Dr. Archer offers an empowering framework for redefining what constitutes mental health. Drawing on his twenty years of clinical experience, he describes eight traits of human behavior—heretofore known
only as psychiatric diagnoses. Each of these occurs along a continuum rather than as a simple on-off switch (where “off ” means we’re fine, and “on” means we’ve got a problem). These are the aspects of our personality that we worry about the most, but these are also the very things that make us distinctive and different.

According to Dr. Archer, each of us has a unique personality that emerges from our hardwired genetics and individual life experiences. With Better Than Normal, you can map your individual characteristics by taking the eight trait
self-assessment quiz and see how what makes you different can indeed make you exceptional. Filled with engaging anecdotes and practical tools to help you capitalize on your unique characteristics, Better Than Normal offers a new and liberating way to look at ourselves and others.(less)

[Autumn · Rating 3 out of 5]

3.5 Stars

This book should be a must for everyone intending to seeking more Knowledge and perspective about mental disorders . Dr Archer takes a friendly approach by categorizing said disorders through specific quizzes rating 1 through 12; where those scoring 1 to 5 have a little or absent trait , 5 through 8 present a strong or dominant trait, and 10 + are those whose lives are hindered and benefit from medication.

Each individual needs to learn how to cope with this traits depending on the "score" or degree of dominance.And what better way than embracing them and turning them into an asset? This is where the book does a great job at demystifying the stigmas and labels attached to mental disorders. He explains their significance in human evolution; where the individuality of character is fundamental for survival. Times have changed, but it does not mean strong traits are less valuable; its our lack of confidence and trying to fit in molds makes us feel unfit and inadequate.


Become your best friend. "It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything." this can only happen when you let go of the "should be" and embrace the " just am"

[mmmm · Rating 5 out of 5]

Wow. A must-read for anyone with mental illness, or who has been concerned that they have something even if they haven't been diagnosed. I really think this is the future of thinking about these issues: as a spectrum with many potential upsides. I found this particularly helpful as I've had several diagnoses over time and even though I'm in good health, I'm perhaps hypervigilant about symptoms. I am very grateful for this book.

Just to be clear, it is NOT pushing against good psychiatric care or medication, just a more balanced way of looking at symptoms, and in particular about elements that are more like personality traits. I've heard many people with bipolar talk about feeling like the potential benefits make it hard to stick with treatment, and also make it frustrating to talk about everything in terms of pathology. This is the most helpful and balanced thing I've read that takes those ideas seriously while still encouraging proper treatment.

Ugh I wish I could make everyone read this!

[Joanne Mazzotta · Rating 5 out of 5]

THis doctor is brilliant. There is no magic pill. Better Than Normal: How What Makes You Different Can Make You Exceptional

[Laurla2 · Rating 5 out of 5]

Better Than Normal offers a new and liberating way to look at ourselves and others.

i liked that it offers ways to find the GOOD in these traits.

of the 8 traits, with 12 being the highest you can score. i scored highest in shy (social anxiety disorder) 11, hyper-alert (generalized anxiety disorder) 10.7, perfectionist (ocd) 7.5, adventurous (adhd) 7.4. i scored lowest in dramatic (histrionic) 4.3, self focused (narcissistic) 4.5, high energy (bipolar) 5.2, and magical thinking (schizophrenia) 5.3.

i was first caught by a story about perfectionism. how a man wants to buy a camera, and gets lost and overwhelmed in researching which camera to buy. i've done this! too many options, too many reviews, how do i choose?

positive characteristics of perfectionism are:
- drive, know how to set and reach realistic attainable goals
- thoroughness, great attention to detail
- neatness and organization
- high standards
- focus, as long as your obsessions don't tip over into the extreme, they can help you concentrate on the task at hand.

the next thing that touched me is the characteristics of being shy. a quiet life is not a bad one. i wished people understood and believed that. i like calm, orderly, and quiet. but society says no, you must be outgoing or there's something wrong with you.
community support approaches are not best, they cause more stress than peace for shy people.
can feel lonely in the company of others.

a person spent many years thinking she should want to be a part of a huge social network. she should want to feel like getting out. should join more clubs and groups. and then she felt inadequate because she wasn't doing these things. i feel this way. i think i SHOULD be doing these things, but i don't want to. and i feel bad because i don't want to, but i also feel bad because i'm not doing these things.

positive characteristics of a shy person are:
- great observers and interpreters.
- better at identifying facial cues and are more likely to recognize how people are feeling.
- keen listening skills.
- attentive to nuances.
- empathy towards others, caring and considerate.
- deliberate thoughtful decision making
- independence
- productive solitude.

anxiety can help us make important changes in our life. an inner alert system letting you know things AREN'T fine. the body is sending strong signals that you're not in a good place in life. its a sign that something is amiss and needs to be addressed.
the biggest source of anxiety is anxiety itself.
anxiety makes us irritable, easily fatigued, and restless.
alcohol is a depressant, it slows down thinking. which is why anxious people drink.

positive characteristics of an anxious person are:
- vigilance. alert people pay close attention.
- preparedness.
- intuition. knowing without knowing HOW you know.
- observation. highly aware of surroundings, and notice even subtle changes.
suggests turning your hyper alert energy into something that gives you awareness and confidence about what to do in life's trying situations.

people with magical thinking/schizophrenia positive characteristics:
- imagination
- intelligence
- intuition
- faith

[Marijo Spehar · Rating 4 out of 5]

The book explores 8 types of personalities. Before reading the book, I suggest you take a questionnaire at the end of the book, which will give you sort of an understanding into which type of personalities are most predominant in you

The book gives you basic understanding of every personality, its traits, how to live with it, how to get the most of it, and basically summarizes the content with the idea that no matter who are you , you're not abnormal. An interesting part of the book that stick with me is that people with same predominant personalities usually don't function well , or to better put it, opposites attract each other.

I recommend it!

[Charissa Wilkinson · Rating 4 out of 5]

Overview: Dr. Archer has spent over twenty years as a psychiatrist. What can he tell us about our mental health crisis that the nation is facing.

Dislikes: There are several words that you will have to redefine while reading this book. Most professions have their own language, and this is no different.

Likes: It's refreshing to find a psychiatrist that doesn't start off with the medications. And the questionnaires are interesting.

Conclusion: This is an interesting book. You just might be shocked at what your dominant personality trait is.

[Bethany Miller · Rating 5 out of 5]

An excellent read for personality studies, psychology, and interpersonal relationships. I wish I had found this book when I was doing my dissertation research. I have such a better understanding now about psychological traits and how to maximize my differences.

#reading #books #personality #psychology #differences

[Lisa · Rating 2 out of 5]

Not a lot was in this book that isn’t common sense. But, some do not possess common sense so I realize it has to be said somewhere. It’s not a bad book, just repetitive. The symptoms and problems dealt here are broken down again and again. I was expecting more.

[Elinor Hurst · Rating 2 out of 5]

Fairly superficial.

[Staci · Rating 3 out of 5]

Interesting way of thinking about different personality traits and how we fluctuate along the continuum of each.. 3.5 stars... enjoyed this

[GruelCarp · Rating 3 out of 5]

We spend a lot of time examining the negative aspects of diagnoses without shining light on the positive. This definitely helped me feel better about mine!

[Kim L-squared · Rating 2 out of 5]

2.5 ...

[Alli Tripp · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is an excellent overview of the complexity of 8 different areas of mental health and the diverse range of each of these in how they affect us, both in strengths and challenges

[David · Rating 2 out of 5]

Returned to library almost immediately. I had thought maybe I would find myself reflected in some neuroatypical way, but I could not get past gag-inducing self-regard by the author.

[Ferrin Borden Landry · Rating 1 out of 5]

Hot garbage that reads like a Cosmo article.

[Elayne · Rating 4 out of 5]

(reread)
This book is so great for a positive perspective on differences - that faces the reality of the struggles too

[Melinda · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book expressed clearly and authoritatively a concept I've often thought: the idiosyncrasies we all have are or can be strengths. We need to not condemn each other for being different, but help our families and friends work around and work with their strengths, in many cases instead of medication or treatment, though the author does not rule out medication and therapy in dealing with mental extremes. This book helped me determine that some of the qualities my children have, different from my own qualities, are strengths given to them. I know that in their missions in life they will need their strengths. My job is to learn to understand and help them adjust their expectations of their own behavior and habits to allow success and to redefine for themselves what best working conditions are. What fits me will not necessarily be helpful to them.

I liked the quizzes in the appendix; I understand better myself and my family members by going through these. The author clearly describes and illustrates 8 categories of mental differences, with strengths and weaknesses of each type, clarifying that there are varying degrees and different combinations of qualities in each person. I recognized one of my children particularly; I needed this information now.

[Sally · Rating 4 out of 5]

Most of us have some symptoms of something. Others are actually diagnosed and dealing with various aspects of whatever. This book looks at the benefit side of not being "normal." The quizes were interesting. I would have tweaked a thing or two, but they were fairly accurate for me. I scored highest in "adventurous" (aka ADHD tendencies) and "hyper-alert" (aka general anxiety), which is a strange mix. Most interesting thing was that I used to score excessively on "shy" (aka social anxiety), but now have almost no indicators. I have worked so hard at being more conversational and have been blessed to lose some of the crippling daily anxiety I used to deal with every single minute. Things can change drastically, even in basic personality traits.

Refreshing perspective - not entirely true for everyone's everything, but certainly a jumping off point for re-thinking your strengths and weaknesses.

An aside: The author would probably bug me to no end in real life. I can't imagine ever trusting him in a therapy situation. But it takes all kinds...

[Chris Craddock · Rating 5 out of 5]

Dr. Dale Archer has written a book of pop psychology that posits the following premise: Most psychological disorders fall into eight categories of traits that exist on a continuum. When any of these traits become super dominant they can present problems, but there are also positive aspects to the traits. Is your glass half empty or half full? When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. And so forth.

The Bottom Line is that Better Than Normal is better than your normal pop psychology book. It is a pop psychology book, but I don't mean that in a pejorative sense, but rather, it is written for the lay person, the average person, who needs help but not necessarily medical attention, therapy, or medication. Dr. Dale Archer has really hit the target with his aim to help people better understand themselves and the unique traits and talents they were given.

Better Than Your Average Pop Psychology Book, a review by Chris Craddock of Dr. Dale Archer's Better Than Normal: How What Makes You Different Can Make You Exceptional

[Alicia · Rating 5 out of 5]

I love books like this-- ones that make you look at yourself and people around you to figure them out using science. Archer's premise of the book is that everyone thinks they're not normal, but in reality, what's normal is really just on a continuum.

He breaks down personalities that run the spectrum from non-existent to super-dominant and by using a simple questionnaire, you get a reading on where you fall on each of the traits. Then, you read the chapters, reading in to you and picking out those around you that have these qualities to better understand it. This is certainly text-to-world and text-to-self connections that are important in having an internal dialogue. And like the subtitle suggests, he takes what would be perceived as negative mental disorders (if they are super-dominant) and breaks down the ascendant traits of if they fall someone in the dominant range. How do you harness them? LOVED IT. Would highly recommend it.

PS-- I totally took notes.

[Susannah · Rating 4 out of 5]

Dale Archer, a psychiatrist, presents an interesting theory about how personality traits fall on a spectrum, from barely present to disorder, rather than either having the condition, or not. He also advocates how you must embrace your dominant traits and make them work to your advantage. There are tests at the back you can take to see if you are dominant in any of these traits: Adventurous (ADHD), Perfectionist (OCD), Shy (Social Anxiety Disorder), Hyper-Alert (Generalized Anxiety Disorder), Dramatic (Histrionic), Self-Focused (Narcissistic), High Energy (Bipolar) and Magical (Schizophrenic). Archer offers advice on how to use your traits, what careers are best for you, and evolutionary ideas as to why these particular traits exist in society.

[Marleah (marleah_a) · Rating 3 out of 5]

This is a good book for laypeople who wants to gain insight into the people around them. We've all heard people call themselves OCD, or call other people narcissistic - but isn't everyone on a continuum for those traits? Archer takes 8 traits that, in their extreme form, can be diagnosable mental illnesses or personality disorders and shows us how those same traits can actually be very positive and even desirable in certain situations.

Archer breaks each trait down and describes how someone who scores high on that trait (yes, there are questionnaires included) may behave in relationships or at work. In reading this book, you are likely to find a lot of folks that you know, and maybe even a trait to describe yourself.