Welcome back to another series of.... Niyya's rants about the absurdity of books these days! But special edition: she's so confused she doesn't know what she's writing! So if YOU get confused, that's why.
I honestly am feeling so many feelings, I can't grasp it all. If you want a halal romance, this isn't it. Spoilers below!
So when the book began, I was okay with it and it was going great, Nada has a secret as to why she doesn't want to go to the Deen&Dunya convention. I thought the fiance of Haleema, her best friend, was HER ex-fiance, which was why she was super dodgy about meeting him. But it's actually the fiance's BROTHER, Baz, that she's avoiding.
We arrive at the convention, filled with thousands of Muslims. I've been to MAS-ICNA and so I know about the free-mixing, which doesn't strike me as haram in this instance, if your intention isn't to be chasing after guys or girls and you're there for the sake of learning more about Islam or connecting with it. Nada sees Baz again because the fiance, Zayn, is in a band and has many fangirls (ick). She gets tickets to go to a speed-dating-matrimonial event at the convention and Baz is super cold towards her. Haleema suspects something and Nada tells her she used to be Baz's bully when they were kids.
The story of that: When they were eleven, Baz came to Sunday School as a new kid. Nada was like a queen bee there but she got bullied at regular school, not that it's an excuse, so she found a way to cope by doing it to someone else. She decided Baz was not someone to be liked. So she began bullying him constantly but Baz never stood up for himself. One day, there was an event. Baz played the daf, a Persian instrument, and Nada publicly humiliated him by calling him, "Duffman". Baz never came back to Sunday School after that.
That's that. After that, Nada gives her ticket back to Baz and there's a concert at the Islamic convention (I honestly don't get how that works?💀) where Zayn and Baz are performing.
This is where I began noticing red flags. Zayn squeezes Haleema's arm and Nada mentions how the Muslim crowd was probably giving looks of disapproval but she thinks the gesture was just a fiance-couple thing. I was skeptical but brushed it off because even though that is completely wrong- you shouldn't touch them until the nikkah is done- some people actually believe that.
Back to the story: Nada is shocked because she thought Baz stopped performing a long time ago, because of her.
While Baz is singing, these muslimah fangirls start throwing hijabs that they bought on the stage like you would with flowers. My eyes went WIDE. Not because that's an absolute waste of hijabs since they're crazy expensive for no reason, but because that was something that just HAPPENED😭
While Nada is swooning at Baz's voice, a woman in front of her reaches for her bag to throw another hijab, but ends up colliding her elbow in Nada's eye. Nada passes out.
She wakes up to see Baz and Haleema's concerned face. Haleema goes to the command center or sm, idk, and leaves her with Baz. He's walking her back to her room and he's being respectful, not touching her. Green flag, right?
Then she stumbles and suddenly his hands are wrapped around her waist tightly😐 So unnecessary. But again, brushed it off, because I guess accidents (not really) like that happen?
Haleema mentions that Baz stopped the entire show when Nada passed out, hinting at something.
scibblydoo, we're back in the past, and it's the story of meeting Baz again at camp when they're fourteen. There's a new queen bee, Firdous, and she's an absolute brat. She's constantly after Baz, trying to get his attention. She has this friend, Bisma, who was actually sweet to Nada. While everyone was around the campfire, someone pulled off Nada's hijab. She panicked, of course, ducking her head. The next day, she sees Baz. He's super sweet, telling her no one saw anything. They make amends and become friends. She doesn't see Baz again after camp.
skipping forward: she meets Firdous again, still the same as before. Mooning over Baz and being a classic mean girl.
Yadayada, Nada ends up going to the matrimonial event because her older brother got divorced a long time ago and hasn't had a life since and so she decides to blackmail Baz into getting tickets. The first person she sits with is her nemesis, Haneef. Haneef is a fraud. He worked with Nada to launch her app, Ask Apa, but six months before her launch, HE launched an app called Ukhti. Then Nada's app became a dupe, a copycat and Haneef made millions.
They bicker and argue, then the next person is Baz. They talk as if everything was normal between them. I forgot what happened next.
Boom, the past again. This time, Nada's at college and Baz is there. They meet often in the library because he brings a prayer mat to college and allows Nada to use it. But they only exchange salams. Then they walk to jummah prayer on Fridays together and only speak for about ten minutes. They become friends and Nada starts to have a crush on Baz. One day, he forgot his sketchbook on the prayer mat. She opened it to see a drawing of her and a beautiful poem, potentially about her. Baz sees her looking at his book and gets angry, flustered, and upset. He storms out the room and never spoke to her again.
Okay, now we have a Muslim gala dinner. Nada and Baz talk and laugh for a couple of minutes before Firdous arrives. Then Firdous says something that sparks memories from their past, which makes Nada and Baz start arguing. Then Baz leaves and later, he's on the stage, and he sings. The song is about heartbreak and Nada starts to feel suffocated. She runs out and Baz is behind her.
Now. This scene. This was my catalyst. When Nada takes a step closer to him, I was like, "Oh no you don't. KEEP THAT DISTANCE. SIX. FEET. APART. 🤨"
Baz says he wrote every song for her and then his hands are on her waist again. GRFAGHHHH GET YOUR HANDS OFF HER.
Next thing you know, Allahu Akbar, they kiss. And it's not a normal kiss, it's a makeout session.
I shut the book and was left dumbfounded because there was NO WAY THEY KISSED AT AN ISLAMIC EVENT. SHE'S NOT EVEN YOUR FIANCE, LET ALONE YOUR WIFE. WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO KISS HER???
After they kiss, he whispers, "I missed you, habibti." I GAGGED. Habibti? HABIBTI? REALLY???
Anyways, Nada runs away even though he begs for her to stay.
Uhhhh, flash forward: They've been "married" this entire damn time. Baz asked out Nada (again, after flirting) and they began talking (slash flirting). It was okay at first, in public places, but then he began holding her hand and squeezing it. WHY. But Nada tells her parents about a "new friend" and her mother tells her that once they become more aqquainted, she should bring him to her parents.
Once Baz and her parents meet, they disapprove of him because he works with his father, dropped out of college to travel, and is an artist. But Nada and Baz stay strong.
UNTIL. UNTILLLLL, she nikkahfies (it's actually not even valid because there was no wali) Baz secretly. Her parents don't know, his parents don't know. Wonderful. Great. Subhanallah. They're super happy, super romanticy in public. They book hotels whenever they want to have $3x and lie to their families about why they were out so late. So healthy. So halal.
Then she gets advice after telling someone about Baz, who tells her that they should get divorced because imagine if her parents found out or she got pregnant? And also because since the marriage didn't start the right way, it wouldn't end the right way.
Next thing: Nada's period is two weeks late. She starts panicking and freaking out, even though the test was negative. She tells Baz, who was EXCITED because he thought it was positive. Then she says it wasn't and that's the issue and that they can't do this anymore. Baz begs and begs, but she refuses. He then tells her that if she wants a divorce, it'll be her who will divorce him. Then he leaves. For six years.
This is such a stupid story. I'm so disappointed by UJ because I really liked Ayesha at Last.
Let me tell you about Haleema now. Zayn, her fiance, is always with the fangirls, who are OBSESSED with him, which is concerning since they're all Muslim girls/hijabis. He's taking selfies with them all the time and barely has space for Haleema. He also hasn't announced his engagement to her because he wants to keep it quiet since the Zaynimals (girl wtf 💀) will go ballistic. So Haleema posts the engagement without telling him. He's a little upset about it but they're okay. Then comes their rehearsal dinner (what does that even mean) and we find out Zayn broke it off.
I honestly didn't like Zayn. A Muslim boy band idol who is okay with girls fawning over him and flirting with him. How- Okay.
But either way, Haleema gets a concussion and breaks her ankle after tripping on her lehenga. Zayn talks to Nada and explains he's worried he can't make her happy and that's why he broke it off. LAME!!!
Anyway, in the end, Nada gets justice for her app, and at the wedding of Zayn and Haleema, her and Baz make up and make out. Then Nada's mother witnesses it 💀 They explain everything and happily ever after.
Idk what all of this was, but it was not okay.
Things I did enjoy though:
How prayer was represented in the book. In Muslim books, prayer is barely portrayed, even though it's one of our five pillars. We see Nada pray all her five prayers, which made me really happy.
The feeling of being in an Ummah. When Nada walks into the convention, she's overcome with joy because of the amount of Muslims she sees since you don't see Muslims gathered like this unless it's at the masjid. I related to this so much because when I went to MAS-ICNA last year, I had that same feeling.