Jump to ratings and reviews
Rate this book

By Th?r?se Jacobs-Stewart Paths are Made by Walking: Practical Steps for Attaining Serenity (1st First Edition) [Hardcover]

Rate this book
Who wouldn't opt for positive action over rash reaction in frustrating situations?

Hardcover

First published June 4, 2003

14 people want to read

About the author

Thérèse Jacobs-Stewart

6 books5 followers

Ratings & Reviews

What do you think?
Rate this book

Friends & Following

Create a free account to discover what your friends think of this book!

Community Reviews

5 stars
3 (23%)
4 stars
5 (38%)
3 stars
4 (30%)
2 stars
1 (7%)
1 star
0 (0%)
Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews
Profile Image for Joshua Buhs.
647 reviews132 followers
July 24, 2015
The best part of this book is the title--and, unintentionally, a personal note I found in my used copy.

I like the idea that "Paths Are Made By Walking"--that there isn't some predetermined path we are "supposed" to walk down, or that paths are there for us to follow, whether they are well-developed or less-traveled. We are always making our paths and, within wide limits, there are no right ones, or wrong ones, just the ones we walk (but do not follow).

Otherwise, the book is a fairly conventional one on mindfulness, albeit one that also tries to bring in neuroscience. Jacobs-Stewart was mentored by Daniel Goleman, he of the quadrillion-copy selling "Emotional Intelligence," and she starts off the book with a whole section on neuroscience that owes a great deal to Goleman. In particular, she discusses what he sometimes (and she frequently) calls an amygdala hijack: that time when our negative emotions--fear, anger, jealousy--overwhelm our rational response. I didn't find this section particularly useful because I don't need the notion of an amygdala hijack to understand what Jacobs-Stewart is discussing, and because I find self-help books rooted in neurology to be of limited shelf-life: first because it doesn't really matter what the neurology is, second because neurological concepts are frequently changing, and third because I think these books exaggerate the degree to which we understand the neurological bases of behavior.

The heart of the book is the second section, when she moves on to very pragmatic responses to these hijacks--ways to control emotions and retain grace, even under pressure--culled mostly from the literature on mindfulness, at least what was there around the year 2000. There are five chapters, each focusing on a particular technique: tuning in (concentrating on the breath so that one can experience the moment and not be overwhelmed); naming your experience (so that everything doesn't just feel like a chaotic mess--a way of gaining control); accepting what you feel (without judgment--feelings are just feelings, neither good nor bad, it's the actions that count); looking deeply (asking why you feel that way, and avoiding what Buddhist literature refers to as poisons, bees, or hornets of the mind: insisting upon one's own righteousness and the stupidity of others, escaping into cravings and justifying them as needed); staying poised (initially regaining poise after a hijack, with an eye toward thwarting the hijack in the first place).

While rooted in Buddhist practices, these are mostly self-help recommendations, with Jacobs-Stewart encouraging journaling and spending quiet time at the end of the day developing these different disciplines, There is nothing wrong with these, and they can be vey useful. The presentation is simple, and fine. I prefer "How to Be Sick," which covers a lot of the same ground with a more personal, less clinical approach--I guess that's it, the book is simply too clinical for my tastes.

The third section is kind of a dog's breakfast of other topics that Jacobs Stewart wanted to discuss but didn't otherwise fit. She recommends becoming more empathetic, living harmoniously--without rancor in relationships--and letting go--the Buddhist notion that all things must pass. Again, these are all valuable skills to attain, and she does offer some more practical advice on doing so, but the section feels more scattered, and the writing less controlled.

If you are interested in beginning mindfulness practices, the book is a good place to start, especially if you only read the second section.

But, keep in mind, the world has a way of thwarting desires--remember to let go--even the desire to become mindful: when you come across the Buddha on the road, kill it. This book has a personal dedication by the author to someone named "Jan":

"Wishing you a great success in your path to publishing your work Showers of Abundance . . . one step at a time . . . "

I haven't been able to find a book called "Showers of Abundance" written by someone named Jan.

Let go. Hold expectations lightly.
Profile Image for Amanda Rafuse.
365 reviews6 followers
August 27, 2010
Wonderful, wonderful, wonderful. This book explains the science behind why our brains work the way we do, how our emotions are involved, and how meditation and other practices can help us change the way we behave. So relevant to me right now. Looking forward to progressing further!
Profile Image for Deb.
713 reviews11 followers
March 17, 2011
Pretty good self help book, but I'm not willing to do the writing, so it didn't help my self so much. I didn't finish it.
Displaying 1 - 3 of 3 reviews

Can't find what you're looking for?

Get help and learn more about the design.