They say pop-culture novels reflect the worries and hopes of their societies. Judging from this
1950's piece of hard boiled/"mystery"/propaganda, America was in serious danger of soiling its shorts from the communist threat.
I'm warning you now, don't read it. There are superior books in this genre. Spillaine even wrote some himself. But, if you just have to know the plot to this turkey, I've read it so you don't have to:
SPOILER ALERT!!!!!!!
This wretched book opens with Mike Hammer having an uncharacteristic mope on a bridge at
night in the middle of a snowstorm.
Mike is pissyfaced, but he doesn't know why. Is he having a mid-life crisis? Is his manhood wilting from low T levels? It seems that everyone calling him a mad-dog killer depresses him. There is that one particular judge who referred to him as a homicidal maniac.
Nobody does that to Hammer!
So Hammer proceeds to act like a homicidal maniac by killing a guy on the bridge and watching a woman commit suicide.
Still irked, Hammer opts to desecrate the guy's corpse and kick it over the bridge. Before he does, he discovers both of the deceased people possessed green cards with strangely cut corners.
What are these cards for? They allow a nest of commie spies to identify each other. (That's right, they're green-card-carrying commies!)
Oh, there has also been a murder allegedly committed by a populist political candidate where the victim was clutching a similar green card.
Anyways, Mike decides to check out the commies, who apparently hang out on street corners trying to proselytize the masses, (because that's how they roll). They are also spies with zero trade-craft.
Hammer keeps saying how dumb the commies are, and he is able to follow them to their commie hidey-hole and just walk right in. Guess they make convenient strawmen to advance the plot.
After intimidating the commies with his sheer manliness, Hammer is mistaken for somebody's replacement.
Mike decides he's pissed at the commies, or the beatniks, or whatever the hell they are. (He's a little vague as to their actual political philosophies, so you could consider him to be ranting against the nascent counter-culture movement.)
Somehow Hammer determines these commies get their instructions straight from Moscow.
A beautiful blond socialite visits the commies. Impressed by Hammer's manliness, she lets him drive her home in her car.
Then a subplot about the twin psychotic brother of that much-loved populist politician being the murderer pops up.
While trying to help the politician catch his psycho brother, Mike, his police buddy Pat, and his secretary Velda are involved in a subway death. Hammer isn't convinced that death was suicide. But at least Hammer wasn't moping and whining about commies during this part, and we don't have to listen to Hammer sounding like Travis Bickle and whining about the filth of the city, hoping the rain will wash it away. (I thought Hammer was going to whinge his enemies to death.)
Hammer then calls the blond socialite and impresses her with his manliness. Then he starts moping about commies.
He and the socialite get drunk in his attempt to get her tipsy to answer some questions. They fornicate in a Harlequin Romance interlude which left me bored. And this only 50 pages after Mike spent two pages saying how important Velda was to him. (Imagine that.)
Hammer visits the politician and impresses that politico's secretary with his manliness enough for her to reveal important medical information about her boss to a complete stranger.
Hammer returns to the commie spy nest and realizes he's been mistaken for an MKV tough. At least it gives him more time to do valuable anti-commie moping. Apparently there are no librarians or reporters in this spy nest. They don't recognize a noted killer like Hammer, who has had recent brushes with the law, enough for a judge to proclaim him a homicidal maniac.
All the commies are ugly, and even their secretary is plain. Hammer gloats over how much smarter he is that they.
Hammer and Velda decide to investigate the politician's alleged murder victim. Mike thinks this is victim is a commie spy. His new theory is that this victim was used by the commies as courier, and was killed by the politician's psycho brother who stole the MacGuffin paper.
Now Mike thinks the guy he killed on the bridge was the MVD agent assigned to find the MacGuffin papers. This leads to another commie moping session where Mike whines that the US is too open with its information.
There is an assassination attempt on Hammer after the commie meeting. Hammer blames the socialite for searching his wallet while he was conked out. (He's only been giving out his phone number to half the commies.)
Reporters come to Hammer for his assassination story. Then the ugly commie girl visits. Out go the reporters. At least Hammer likes her body, leading to another half-assed Harlequin interlude of shtupping.
A second murder attempt against Hammer is thwarted (again by stupidity).
Afraid that the commies will smear the great American populist politician he's working for, Mike indulges in more anti-commie whingeing. He alone is man enough to see the threat.
Now Hammer just wants to kill commies. Velda wants to deport anyone she merely suspects is a commie. This leads to a make out session with Velda, and a proposal of marriage from Mike.
They also speak about the politician, who seems to be a stand-in for McCarthy. This allows for a self-indulgent rant of how Hammer is never going to die, will beat the reaper, and he'll take a lot of people out when he does die.
The radio announces a current national security breach (dream on Spillane. BTW, isn't that being too open with the information?); the dead the psycho brother stole the security papers.
Hammer and Velda search the last hideout of the psycho brother. This leads to a commie ambush, with an action scene written in confuse-o-ese.
(What is the layout of the building?) Velda kills one of the commies, leading to a discussion of how Hammer and Velda enjoy killing.
Mike plays with his gun for what must be the fourth time this novel. Hammer gets an illegal gun for Velda.
Hammer is called in by the cops, where it is revealed that the commies he killed last night all had criminal records, so killing them was okay. (Guess commies then are like child molesters now - convenient objects for the protagonist to slay without moral qualms.)
Mike whines that the cops have to wait for bad things to happen (unlike the "cops" in the USSR?).
More commie moping time about a trial over something communist related.
Hammer thinks he sees commies making a cash payoff at the trial.
The socialite is also at the trial, and Mike has spanking fantasies about her, thinking she fingered him for the attempted assassinations. Hammer meets up with the socialite, and they drive to her love-shack in the woods. A car following them rolls off the hill. (It seems to be a long way to go for Hammer to get a tommygun.)
When he arrives at the socialite's lovers nest, Hammer pushes her down, strips her, and ties her up, (which in more enlightened times is called sexual assault). She is shot before he can start whipping her with his belt.
Hammer realizes the socialite was the target of the hitman, not him. So he figures that his beating the socialite actually saved her life because she twisted when the shot was fired. The shot just missed her heart. (In more enlightened times this would be called justifying a criminal act.)
From her pained whispering, Hammer learns that his manliness convinced of the socialite of the wrongness of communism. He is also able to find a doctor who makes house calls.
Hammer now realizes the socialite did not finger him. (He's only been fingering himself throughout the book.)
Hammer tries ot frighten the doctor into keeping silent about Hammer's involvement. Doctor is
apparently impressed by Hammer's manliness, and allows Hammer to run away so as to not be involved with the police. (If only the police had not waited until after the attempted rape had occurred?)
It turns out the socialite had turned the commies, and Hammer, into the FBI. It was FBI agents who were in that car which rolled over.
Mike and Velda now search the murder victim's room. They make a connection; there is a picture of the suicide girl in the room. She was the nurse to the psycho brother.
Velda comes onto Hammer using a sheer neglige. He turns her down.
The cops finally get fingerprints off the cigarette pack of the suicide girl. She was a nurse at psycho brothers Ward, and also a commie
Hammer goes to suicide girl's apartment, figuring she must have had the MacGuffin papers mailed to her. Men are leaving with her mailbox. Are they commies? Fortunately the landlady has the letter anyway.
Mike thinks he's got the case figured out. (Which is good. I'm glad one of us is making sense of this convoluted mess. At least while he's theorizing Hammer is not moping about commies.)
Meanwhile the radio is still announcing the security breach. Mike laughs as he has the MacGuffin papers, and things look bad for the commies.
Velda is sent off to investigate the psycho brother's/suicide girl's hospital stay. When she returns Velda is kidnapped.
Hammer calls the number on the ransom note left for him. He learns from the cops that the number is for a pay phone at the train station.
Hammer camps out at a payphone opposite the abductor/spy/commie's payphone.
This spy has no spy-craft, and Mike is able to trail him to a bad part of town. This gives us several pages of a Mike-mope about how the judge is right and he is kill-happy.
Inside the burnt-out factory the commies have the naked Velda tied up. They are leering at her and whipping her. (Hmmm, I seem to recall a scene just like this. Now where was it?)
Now Hammer gets to use his purloined tommygun.
He goes medieval in the factory in the mopiest commando raid ever. He kills everybody, somehow missing Velda with the tommygun's bullets.
Hammer continues butchering the dead while the tortured Velda still hangs there. He finally cuts her down, sets fire to the place, brings her back to his place.
Hammer now calls the politician. They go to the bridge where it all started. Mike burns the MacGuffin papers. He tells the politician how much he likes killing commies. Hammer has it all figured out; the politician is actually the psycho brother, who is also a commie. (Thus, by the power of association, all commies are mentally ill, which ironically is what Communists said about their democratic dissidents).
Hammer gives a convoluted wrap-up of who killed who and why, (plastering over obvious plot holes, leaving me disinclined to care).
Eventually the torturing of the guilty starts. Mike kills the politician, (allowing Hammer to make America safe to be an amoral cesspit of capitalism).
The big question about this novel is, are these real representations of Spillane's beliefs? Is Spillane numb enough not to see the self mocking irony of his anger? Was he mentally sodomized by his own hatred?
Or is this novel a cynical attempt to give the money-spending suckers of that time what they wanted; hot-blooded, anti-Communist diatribes and self righteous blood shed? Are those rants just padding to create the proper contractual word length?
This is an idiot novel; everyone must act like an idiot in order for the plot to proceed. We are stuck with an Ayn Rand superman being kept down by the forces of fools in society. Hammer's manliness cannot be contained by the law or society. As he says, "I make my own rules. I don't have to account to anybody." I'm glad he didn't miss with any of his shots and accidentally kill a child during those assassination attempts.
It is also impressive how hopped up Hammer gets over the Commie subversion of America while he's so proud of how he doesn't vote and doesn't believe in American politics.
At least this novel answered one major question that hangs over all Mike Hammer novels; how the hell does Hammer manage to make a living? He never seems to investigate anything for anyone else. Hammer is always on the vengeance trail, and the pay usually sucks. But in this case, he's taking payment from the politician. Guess Velda gets to eat this month.
Which leads to another thought; Hammer does not like women. They exist for him to copulate with. Some, like Velda, are capable. Yet none are any match for Hammer's manliness.
While Velda is supposedly special to him, Hammer ruthlessly cheats on her.
Does Spillane really believe any of this? Or is the book a joke, a stroke job for the paranoid right, allowing Spillaine to seem sympathetic to them while he takes their money.
I've read to other books by Spillane starring Hammer, and they were passable.
This one is one hundred and seventy-six pages of some action and pure shite. Part lyrical ode for psychotic machismo, part harlequin romance for men.
If you want to read about communist thugs who get into situations over their heads, read John leCarre's "Smiley's People".
If you want to read about an insane amount of killing and the metaphysical angst it causes those trying to sort it out, read Dashiell Hammett's "Red Harvest".
Stay away from this one. It's a stinker. There is a reason it's out of print.