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A Heart for Freedom: The Remarkable Journey of a Young Dissident, Her Daring Escape, and Her Quest to Free China's Daughters
The dramatic and fascinating story of Chai Ling, commander-in-chief of the student protesters at Tiananmen Square and witness to the massacre of thousands of Chinese civilians. Risking imprisonment and possible death for her leadership role in the student democracy movement, she was on the run in China for ten months while being hunted by the authorities. She eventually escaped to the U.S., completed her education at Princeton and Harvard, found true love, and became a highly successful entrepreneur. But her desperate quest for freedom, purpose, and peace--which she had sought in turn through academic achievement, romantic love, political activism, and career success--was never satisfied until she had an unexpected encounter with a formerly forbidden faith. Her newfound passion for God led to her life's greatest mission: Fighting for the lives and rights of young girls in China.
288 pages, Paperback
First published October 1, 2011
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September 2, 2024
The first 4/5 of the book was great, but the last 1/5 clearly jumped the shark.
I have no problem with Chai talking about specific spinoffs of her conversion to Christianity, since that's part of her biography. I'm not so OK with her equating forced abortions for sex in China with all abortions, for serious medical issues even, in the U.S. But, that's a belief that's part of her conservative evangelical conversion. So, it's not the shark-jumping, yet.
What is?
Her belief that China must become a "Jesus fearing" nation before democracy can take root. Tosh. Piddle. Or bullshit. And, one empirically refuted.
A very Chinese, very democratic (and capitalist), prosperous, QUITE non-Christian Taiwan sits across the Straits of Formosa from China.
In addition:
1. A very democratic, very prosperous, majority non-Christian South Korea almost borders China.
2. A very democratic, very prosperous, almost totally non-Christian Japan sits across the Sea of Japan.
3. A semi-democratic, very non-Christian, growingly prosperous Thailand is also in Southeast Asia.
If that's not enough to refute Chai Ling:
A (messily) democratic, not-yet-prosperous, very much non-Christian India has been democratic since its independence.
So, the shark was jumped there.
Related to that, we hear zero, zip, bupkis about what her dad, sister and brother think about her conversion.
I also noticed, by this point, that post-exile, there's almost no print given to fellow Tianamen student leaders who were successful in some way post-exile, rather than those who made peace with Beijing or else couldn't hack it abroad. And, there are other such people.
Result? It's hard not to think of this as half propaganda, half biography. And, having just written that, my review goes down another star. If we had half stars, I'd do 2.5, but I can't give it a full three.
I have no problem with Chai talking about specific spinoffs of her conversion to Christianity, since that's part of her biography. I'm not so OK with her equating forced abortions for sex in China with all abortions, for serious medical issues even, in the U.S. But, that's a belief that's part of her conservative evangelical conversion. So, it's not the shark-jumping, yet.
What is?
Her belief that China must become a "Jesus fearing" nation before democracy can take root. Tosh. Piddle. Or bullshit. And, one empirically refuted.
A very Chinese, very democratic (and capitalist), prosperous, QUITE non-Christian Taiwan sits across the Straits of Formosa from China.
In addition:
1. A very democratic, very prosperous, majority non-Christian South Korea almost borders China.
2. A very democratic, very prosperous, almost totally non-Christian Japan sits across the Sea of Japan.
3. A semi-democratic, very non-Christian, growingly prosperous Thailand is also in Southeast Asia.
If that's not enough to refute Chai Ling:
A (messily) democratic, not-yet-prosperous, very much non-Christian India has been democratic since its independence.
So, the shark was jumped there.
Related to that, we hear zero, zip, bupkis about what her dad, sister and brother think about her conversion.
I also noticed, by this point, that post-exile, there's almost no print given to fellow Tianamen student leaders who were successful in some way post-exile, rather than those who made peace with Beijing or else couldn't hack it abroad. And, there are other such people.
Result? It's hard not to think of this as half propaganda, half biography. And, having just written that, my review goes down another star. If we had half stars, I'd do 2.5, but I can't give it a full three.
April 5, 2020
Incredible and timely read. Powerful memoir by a survivor of Chinese communism and inspiring woman who led democracy protests in 1989. Harrowing yet heart-warming. We need these dissident stories more now than ever. Highly recommended reading.
December 27, 2018
Great book. Compelling firsthand account of the Tiananmen Square protests and massacre, and the Democracy Movement. From a Christian perspective I also really enjoyed the autobiographical nature of the book and the way it delved into the Chai Ling's testimony. That said, from an editorial perspective, the last quarter of the book did feel a bit disjointed in the way the tone and focus changed. I think it could've been improved by some sharper editing. But the message of the book was powerful and well presented and certainly has me interested in learning more about the vital reforms being pushed for by Chai Ling and her organisation!
February 10, 2012
I did like the first 2/3 of this book:
1.First person perspective of the leadership of the 1989 Tiananman Square student protest which resulted in a massacre by the Chinese gov't. Chai Ling was pretty much the leader.
2.Admission of her four abortions under China's one-child and no-child-for-unmarried-women policy
3.Description of her escape (she was basically a fugitive for a whole year inside China) and then the student protest expat community in Paris and the U.S.
If I'd known to stop reading there I would have. The rest of the book is her conversion to Christianity. It gets very pro-life and very preachy. Quotes scripture and provides stories of God speaking to her heart. This might be great and affirming reading for Christians.
1.First person perspective of the leadership of the 1989 Tiananman Square student protest which resulted in a massacre by the Chinese gov't. Chai Ling was pretty much the leader.
2.Admission of her four abortions under China's one-child and no-child-for-unmarried-women policy
3.Description of her escape (she was basically a fugitive for a whole year inside China) and then the student protest expat community in Paris and the U.S.
If I'd known to stop reading there I would have. The rest of the book is her conversion to Christianity. It gets very pro-life and very preachy. Quotes scripture and provides stories of God speaking to her heart. This might be great and affirming reading for Christians.
This entire review has been hidden because of spoilers.
February 23, 2021
A quite powerful recount of political events that lead up to the massacre! The book also touched upon other social issues in China society and some of which still prevail until now (the aftermath of one child policy, lack of spiritual belief system as a way for government to manipulate the society, gendercide, gender imbalance, etc). Don’t like some of the last chapters though, in which she talked about her spiritual transformation to Christianity but it gets to the point it feels like she’s trying to sell it out to readers . Still, an enjoyable and deeply touched personal account about the sacrificed students’ sentiments behind Tiannamen movement and their dream for a free China.
February 9, 2013
I really wanted to like Chai Ling's memoir. It is at times intensely personal, incredibly insightful and full of tense moments. It's heart-wrenching to see the love of democracy emerging in Chai's writing, and to struggle as she does with survivor's guilt of living through the Tianenmen massacre. Her prose, while at times stilted and impersonal, bares the evidence of tremendous self-doubt and difficulty in coming to terms with her past.
But the promise set up in the narrative throughout 3/4 of the book is never delivered upon. The final few chapters of the book detail Chai's conversion to Christianity. The story subsequently substitutes substance for scripture. Chai's story is subsumed by long lamentations and repurposing the words of the Bible to cast a broad stroke detailing the difficulties of her life. While I understand the importance of the faith in her life and coming to terms with the events that led to Tianenmen and her new life in America, the strategy completely turned me off as a reader.
I was also turned off by the long quotations frequently appearing that couldn't possibly have been direct quotes unless the young Chai was fervently taking notes throughout her time on the Square. The fact that she places recorded speeches and words from documents in quotations as well casts much doubt on what is real, what is recollection and what may be exchanges massaged to fit the purpose of Chai's story.
Also, as a copy editor, I was appalled by inconsistencies in statistics that appear in Chai's plea for attention to the abortion issue in America and China. This is where Chai could be making the most powerful, poignant observations in her book. Instead, we're treated to a lengthy pitch for her organization, citing statistics I could have found and copied down (and, might I add, more accurately — at one point, Chai claims more than 40 percent of American women by age 45 will have had an abortion, when the number is much closer to 33 percent, still high, but nowhere near the 50 percent figure the previous statistic placed in my head) to the same effect.
It's a great read for someone examining Christianity and having trouble reconciling their past transgressions on the path to forgiveness. Don't expect a factual retelling of history from a dispassionate source. This is a women clearly writing to reconcile her public and private personas, and she should be commended for revealing so much. But with its faults, the impact falls flat.
But the promise set up in the narrative throughout 3/4 of the book is never delivered upon. The final few chapters of the book detail Chai's conversion to Christianity. The story subsequently substitutes substance for scripture. Chai's story is subsumed by long lamentations and repurposing the words of the Bible to cast a broad stroke detailing the difficulties of her life. While I understand the importance of the faith in her life and coming to terms with the events that led to Tianenmen and her new life in America, the strategy completely turned me off as a reader.
I was also turned off by the long quotations frequently appearing that couldn't possibly have been direct quotes unless the young Chai was fervently taking notes throughout her time on the Square. The fact that she places recorded speeches and words from documents in quotations as well casts much doubt on what is real, what is recollection and what may be exchanges massaged to fit the purpose of Chai's story.
Also, as a copy editor, I was appalled by inconsistencies in statistics that appear in Chai's plea for attention to the abortion issue in America and China. This is where Chai could be making the most powerful, poignant observations in her book. Instead, we're treated to a lengthy pitch for her organization, citing statistics I could have found and copied down (and, might I add, more accurately — at one point, Chai claims more than 40 percent of American women by age 45 will have had an abortion, when the number is much closer to 33 percent, still high, but nowhere near the 50 percent figure the previous statistic placed in my head) to the same effect.
It's a great read for someone examining Christianity and having trouble reconciling their past transgressions on the path to forgiveness. Don't expect a factual retelling of history from a dispassionate source. This is a women clearly writing to reconcile her public and private personas, and she should be commended for revealing so much. But with its faults, the impact falls flat.
September 8, 2014
Chai Ling was one of the student organizers of the Tian'anmen protests in June of 1989. This autobiography not only chronicles her version of her life and the events leading up to the June 4 bloody conclusion to these protests, but also her flight from China, life in America, and her continued pursuit of democracy in China, her advocacy against the One-Child program and female gendercide.
Chai Ling was born as the eldest daughter of parents who survived the Cultural Revolution. She chronicles the high expectations for success from her parents, particularly her father, as well as the crucial role of Mrs Qian, a high school teacher. Her national exam results were sufficiently good for her to qualify for entrance to Beijing University, the top university in China. She began studying geology but pursued psychology, a relatively new discipline that had been previously banned.
She went on to pursue graduate studies at Beijing Normal University and married Feng Congde in 1988 (they later divorced). Both ended up in leadership roles in the Tian'anmen protests which began with the death of Hu Yaobang, who had been sympathetic to student concerns for reforming government corruption, advancing democracy, and greater freedoms of speech and the press.
Chai Ling's account of these demonstrations is riveting. There are the early gatherings which the government tolerated until Zhao Ziyang was ousted from party leadership. We read of her startled and fearful reaction when the label of dong luan is applied to the demonstrations, a term roughly meaning "turmoil" and applied to illegal dissidents in the Cultural Revolution. We see the leadership struggles within the student movement and their attempts to ascertain the intent of the government, which had determined to crack down on the demonstrators. She tells the story of the student hunger strikes that garnered much national sympathy and sparked demonstrations throughout the country.
She gives her own version of what she thought an "off the record" interview where at one point she said,
"What we actually are hoping for is bloodshed, the moment when the government is ready to brazenly butcher the people. Only when the Square is awash with blood will the people of China open their eyes. Only then will they really be united. But how can I explain any of this to my fellow students?"
She describes this as kind of a "last will and testament" and argues that it simply reflected her own pessimism that things would work out well, despite international media coverage. Because she was leading the Defend Tian'anmen Square movement, she has been faulted with refusing to end the demonstrations to bring on that kind of bloodshed. She contends in this autobiography that she was concerned uppermost with students safety and that when the time came, she led the exodus from the square in an attempt to avoid bloodshed. It is clear throughout the remainder of this autobiography that this has been one of the most troubling accusations that has haunted her, to the point that she has filed lawsuits against the documentary film company (something she does not mention in the autobiography, perhaps because the lawsuits have been dismissed).
The next part of the book describes her and Feng's efforts to escape the country and the aid given by a Buddhist network in her successful escape. After a short time in France, she was able to enter the U.S., pursue studies at Princeton and Harvard, and meet and marry her second husband at a consulting firm. She chronicles he attempt to launch an IT business with him, Jenzabar, and her conversion to the Christian faith. She describes as the answer to why she was spared her new-found mission "No Girls Allowed", advocating against China's One Child policy and the forced abortions and gendercide of girl fetuses and babies this involves. For those who wrestle with this being an "anti-abortion" piece in disguise, her argument is that both pro-life and pro-choice people, as well as women's rights activists should be able to agree on opposition to forced abortion and to the selective killing of female fetuses and babies.
This section confronts a painful part of her own life, the four abortions she had before her second marriage. Eventually, she recognizes that three of these were forced in the sense that it would have been illegal for her to carry a child to term. Through this, she realized that her message to other women like herself was not, "Come to God and he will forgive you," but "Come to God and he will love you, heal you, and free you." This is the appeal with which she concludes the book.
I found that the most compelling parts of the book were the vivid narrative of the student demonstrations and the kind of "fog of war" they dealt with as they sought to determine next steps and whether and when to leave the Square. I sense Chai Ling has spent her life trying to come to terms both with the students aspirations and their tragic end and her own responsibility for both. This book, to some degree represents a working out of both, with perhaps at times some self justification. But it also represents her deep love and longings for China, and what her homeland could be.
I received a free e-galley copy of this book through the publisher for review purposes via Netgalley.
Chai Ling was born as the eldest daughter of parents who survived the Cultural Revolution. She chronicles the high expectations for success from her parents, particularly her father, as well as the crucial role of Mrs Qian, a high school teacher. Her national exam results were sufficiently good for her to qualify for entrance to Beijing University, the top university in China. She began studying geology but pursued psychology, a relatively new discipline that had been previously banned.
She went on to pursue graduate studies at Beijing Normal University and married Feng Congde in 1988 (they later divorced). Both ended up in leadership roles in the Tian'anmen protests which began with the death of Hu Yaobang, who had been sympathetic to student concerns for reforming government corruption, advancing democracy, and greater freedoms of speech and the press.
Chai Ling's account of these demonstrations is riveting. There are the early gatherings which the government tolerated until Zhao Ziyang was ousted from party leadership. We read of her startled and fearful reaction when the label of dong luan is applied to the demonstrations, a term roughly meaning "turmoil" and applied to illegal dissidents in the Cultural Revolution. We see the leadership struggles within the student movement and their attempts to ascertain the intent of the government, which had determined to crack down on the demonstrators. She tells the story of the student hunger strikes that garnered much national sympathy and sparked demonstrations throughout the country.
She gives her own version of what she thought an "off the record" interview where at one point she said,
"What we actually are hoping for is bloodshed, the moment when the government is ready to brazenly butcher the people. Only when the Square is awash with blood will the people of China open their eyes. Only then will they really be united. But how can I explain any of this to my fellow students?"
She describes this as kind of a "last will and testament" and argues that it simply reflected her own pessimism that things would work out well, despite international media coverage. Because she was leading the Defend Tian'anmen Square movement, she has been faulted with refusing to end the demonstrations to bring on that kind of bloodshed. She contends in this autobiography that she was concerned uppermost with students safety and that when the time came, she led the exodus from the square in an attempt to avoid bloodshed. It is clear throughout the remainder of this autobiography that this has been one of the most troubling accusations that has haunted her, to the point that she has filed lawsuits against the documentary film company (something she does not mention in the autobiography, perhaps because the lawsuits have been dismissed).
The next part of the book describes her and Feng's efforts to escape the country and the aid given by a Buddhist network in her successful escape. After a short time in France, she was able to enter the U.S., pursue studies at Princeton and Harvard, and meet and marry her second husband at a consulting firm. She chronicles he attempt to launch an IT business with him, Jenzabar, and her conversion to the Christian faith. She describes as the answer to why she was spared her new-found mission "No Girls Allowed", advocating against China's One Child policy and the forced abortions and gendercide of girl fetuses and babies this involves. For those who wrestle with this being an "anti-abortion" piece in disguise, her argument is that both pro-life and pro-choice people, as well as women's rights activists should be able to agree on opposition to forced abortion and to the selective killing of female fetuses and babies.
This section confronts a painful part of her own life, the four abortions she had before her second marriage. Eventually, she recognizes that three of these were forced in the sense that it would have been illegal for her to carry a child to term. Through this, she realized that her message to other women like herself was not, "Come to God and he will forgive you," but "Come to God and he will love you, heal you, and free you." This is the appeal with which she concludes the book.
I found that the most compelling parts of the book were the vivid narrative of the student demonstrations and the kind of "fog of war" they dealt with as they sought to determine next steps and whether and when to leave the Square. I sense Chai Ling has spent her life trying to come to terms both with the students aspirations and their tragic end and her own responsibility for both. This book, to some degree represents a working out of both, with perhaps at times some self justification. But it also represents her deep love and longings for China, and what her homeland could be.
I received a free e-galley copy of this book through the publisher for review purposes via Netgalley.
February 2, 2021
Interesting to look back on the Tiananmen square massacre from this girl's viewpoint, her journey growing up in atheist China, her struggle to leave, and finally her rest in finding Jesus Christ.
May 26, 2012
I really wanted to like this book. The author's story is, in fact, remarkable. I give regularly to her nonprofit, All Girls Allowed; AGA is doing innovative and life-saving work in China, and I hope that the publicity from this book will open lots of doors for them.
Unfortunately, the book is not well written. A significant part of the problem is that Chai ("Chai" is her surname, as Chinese surnames precede given names) learned English as an adult. Learning any language (and, I think, particularly English) is difficult, and it seems unfair to fault her for not being entirely fluent. However, given that she chose to prepare the book without a co-author, it made the book more difficult to read. I regularly encountered bits of the narrative that were phrased awkwardly. Additionally - and this was more distracting than the narrative - most of the dialogue comes across as being wooden and artificial. From my studies of Chinese, I suspect that this is a consequence of translating expressions in Chinese into the literal English equivalent, rather than paraphrasing. Chai acknowledges this at one point in the book when one person uses a Chinese expression that, when translated in English, is especially awkward. I respect what I take to be her decision to honor the people she knew by not taking liberties with the translation, but it might have been better to acknowledge her reasoning for the decision earlier, and it did detract from the story. (I also wonder whether some of the dialogue may have been recreated in Chinese and then translated in a near-literal way, as some of the dialogue that takes place in English is also a bit clunky.)
The pacing was also problematic (and had nothing to do with the language barrier). The portion of the book where she describes the alliance-making and strategizing of the student movement moves very slowly and bored me. Once the hunger strike began, I thought the pacing improved: she spent an appropriate amount of time recounting the conversations of the protesters, describing the political climate, and setting forth her own musings about the implications and risks of their activity. I was surprised that she spent so little time describing the massacre itself and her thoughts and feelings in the immediate aftermath (though perhaps it was because she was on the run and wasn't doing much processing then). The pacing of her time in hiding, her flight, and her work in France and the United States was pretty good. However, I thought she should have spent much more time discussing how her conversion from Buddhism to Christianity came to pass: she does mention her first couple of introductions to the faith, but it seems that she jumped from being a relatively devout Buddhist to a committed Christian very quickly. I know that sometimes people do make the transition quickly, but I would have appreciated much more elaboration about how she came to adopt the faith as her own, particularly about how she left her Buddhist beliefs and practices behind. Given that she hadn't done this, her adoption of the evangelical vocabulary seemed jarring.
Finally, I felt that the book didn't hang together thematically. Towards the beginning of the story, when she describes her experiences with abortion and her troubled relationships with men, I understood where she was going. Then she virtually never mentions it for the next two-thirds of the book, until her fourth abortion and then after her conversion. She tries a bit in the last couple of chapters to explain how she had been seeking after freedom in her political activism and in her relational and spiritual life, and how all of that led to her work with AGA... but she didn't try very hard, and I didn't find it convincing.
All in all, the book was a disappointment: there's a really good story to be told, but this really wasn't a great delivery.
Unfortunately, the book is not well written. A significant part of the problem is that Chai ("Chai" is her surname, as Chinese surnames precede given names) learned English as an adult. Learning any language (and, I think, particularly English) is difficult, and it seems unfair to fault her for not being entirely fluent. However, given that she chose to prepare the book without a co-author, it made the book more difficult to read. I regularly encountered bits of the narrative that were phrased awkwardly. Additionally - and this was more distracting than the narrative - most of the dialogue comes across as being wooden and artificial. From my studies of Chinese, I suspect that this is a consequence of translating expressions in Chinese into the literal English equivalent, rather than paraphrasing. Chai acknowledges this at one point in the book when one person uses a Chinese expression that, when translated in English, is especially awkward. I respect what I take to be her decision to honor the people she knew by not taking liberties with the translation, but it might have been better to acknowledge her reasoning for the decision earlier, and it did detract from the story. (I also wonder whether some of the dialogue may have been recreated in Chinese and then translated in a near-literal way, as some of the dialogue that takes place in English is also a bit clunky.)
The pacing was also problematic (and had nothing to do with the language barrier). The portion of the book where she describes the alliance-making and strategizing of the student movement moves very slowly and bored me. Once the hunger strike began, I thought the pacing improved: she spent an appropriate amount of time recounting the conversations of the protesters, describing the political climate, and setting forth her own musings about the implications and risks of their activity. I was surprised that she spent so little time describing the massacre itself and her thoughts and feelings in the immediate aftermath (though perhaps it was because she was on the run and wasn't doing much processing then). The pacing of her time in hiding, her flight, and her work in France and the United States was pretty good. However, I thought she should have spent much more time discussing how her conversion from Buddhism to Christianity came to pass: she does mention her first couple of introductions to the faith, but it seems that she jumped from being a relatively devout Buddhist to a committed Christian very quickly. I know that sometimes people do make the transition quickly, but I would have appreciated much more elaboration about how she came to adopt the faith as her own, particularly about how she left her Buddhist beliefs and practices behind. Given that she hadn't done this, her adoption of the evangelical vocabulary seemed jarring.
Finally, I felt that the book didn't hang together thematically. Towards the beginning of the story, when she describes her experiences with abortion and her troubled relationships with men, I understood where she was going. Then she virtually never mentions it for the next two-thirds of the book, until her fourth abortion and then after her conversion. She tries a bit in the last couple of chapters to explain how she had been seeking after freedom in her political activism and in her relational and spiritual life, and how all of that led to her work with AGA... but she didn't try very hard, and I didn't find it convincing.
All in all, the book was a disappointment: there's a really good story to be told, but this really wasn't a great delivery.
June 24, 2017
What a great read! Such a harsh life that Chai Ling has had over the years, not just at the Tiananmen Square Massacre. But how far she has come, especially after becoming a Christian is amazing. So many Chinese names at times somewhat confused me, but this book is nearly a minute by minute diary of her life.
June 12, 2024
I really liked this book at the beginning. It was very interesting and set the stage for a lot of what happened on June 4th. But I agree with many reviewers that the rest of the book fell short. She spent more than half the book talking about Tiananmen, but then flew through the rest of her life very quickly without a whole lot of detail or context. It left me wheeling and confused. While some reviewers took issue with her conversion to the Christian faith and desire to share that with others, I didn’t mind as that is a core part of her story. But the last five chapters or so were so repetitive and I felt like I was reading the same thing over and over again. She could have concisely spoken about her struggle with parts of her story and whether to include the exhortation to conversion within one chapter. I think this is more of an issue w her editors than the author. I’d recommend the first half with no issue but I can’t get past the weakness of the second half.
September 20, 2023
3.5 rounded up
October 26, 2015
I wanted to like this book more than I did. I'm not sure how it ended up on my TBR pile, but I'm glad it did, even if I didn't enjoy the execution.
The story begins promisingly, with a description of Chai Ling's upbringing in rural China, followed by her move to Beijing to attend university. The early sections provide an interesting glimpse into life in China during the 70s and 80s.
Once Chai gets to university, however, it becomes clear that she's swept away by constantly chasing approval from the men in her life. She frequently describes tragedies and her sense of being lost and adrift. In particular, when her mother dies, she wonders why it happened to her. The rest of the story is similarly framed - each event, from a lover's quarrel to a vicious rape - is treated as equally distressing. At times, it's hard not to compare this to The Rape of the Lock due to a lack of emphasis being placed on any event.
The sections during the Tienanmen uprising shed more light on what may have happened, and crucially include the information that the students had no actual idea what was happening. It also includes some interesting outrage from Chai that the students were labelled as being against the current Communist Party. While I'm not familiar with the intricacies of Chinese politics, when you raise a statue as the Goddess of Democracy and call for open elections, then you are kind of are challenging the current party.
After leaving China, Chai's story grew increasingly uncomfortable for me. She spent her life looking for answers and for someone to externally validate her existence, and she found that in Christianity. While I'm happy for her, the subsequent moralizing and vehemently anti-abortion narrative lost me completely. Here, too, her approach to anything that happens to her as a tragedy equal to the most difficult moments of her life ring hollow. As an extremely well-to-do individual, I have a hard time swallowing her concerns about her livelihood, for example.
Due to the incessant moralizing, I abandoned this with about an hour left to listen. I am glad I read this book, as it inspired me to do my own research on the Tienanmen massacre (which, here in the States, was a blip in the media during my childhood). However, if you have anything like a nuanced view of abortion, you might want to stop a bit earlier - as soon as she's safe in America. (As an example, she repeatedly states that she should ask God for forgiveness for her abortions.)
The story begins promisingly, with a description of Chai Ling's upbringing in rural China, followed by her move to Beijing to attend university. The early sections provide an interesting glimpse into life in China during the 70s and 80s.
Once Chai gets to university, however, it becomes clear that she's swept away by constantly chasing approval from the men in her life. She frequently describes tragedies and her sense of being lost and adrift. In particular, when her mother dies, she wonders why it happened to her. The rest of the story is similarly framed - each event, from a lover's quarrel to a vicious rape - is treated as equally distressing. At times, it's hard not to compare this to The Rape of the Lock due to a lack of emphasis being placed on any event.
The sections during the Tienanmen uprising shed more light on what may have happened, and crucially include the information that the students had no actual idea what was happening. It also includes some interesting outrage from Chai that the students were labelled as being against the current Communist Party. While I'm not familiar with the intricacies of Chinese politics, when you raise a statue as the Goddess of Democracy and call for open elections, then you are kind of are challenging the current party.
After leaving China, Chai's story grew increasingly uncomfortable for me. She spent her life looking for answers and for someone to externally validate her existence, and she found that in Christianity. While I'm happy for her, the subsequent moralizing and vehemently anti-abortion narrative lost me completely. Here, too, her approach to anything that happens to her as a tragedy equal to the most difficult moments of her life ring hollow. As an extremely well-to-do individual, I have a hard time swallowing her concerns about her livelihood, for example.
Due to the incessant moralizing, I abandoned this with about an hour left to listen. I am glad I read this book, as it inspired me to do my own research on the Tienanmen massacre (which, here in the States, was a blip in the media during my childhood). However, if you have anything like a nuanced view of abortion, you might want to stop a bit earlier - as soon as she's safe in America. (As an example, she repeatedly states that she should ask God for forgiveness for her abortions.)
September 18, 2015
This was an intriguing look into the story and psychology of Chai Ling, who was a young woman when she was involved with the Tiananmen Square protests in 1989. A very engaging autobiography! The writing style is clear and easy to follow, even if you know next to nothing about what was happening in China at that time.
She portrays herself as someone who pretty much just "ended up" leading the protest. She was just supporting her husband; other people wanted her there; she was the peacemaker/mediator between "little dictators". She paints herself as rather meek and innocent, a dedicated and dutiful wife/daughter/role X. Yet, even if you aren't aware of her controversial reputation, the facts that she tenaciously and successfully held onto her power in Tiananmen throughout major leadership struggles and later came to start and maintain her own business in a rather cut-throat environment in America suggest that she's more hard-nosed, strategic, and ambitious than she makes herself out to be. That isn't a bad thing necessarily. Personally, I thought it added another fascinating layer to the whole story, but it did highlight that you can't swallow her every word hook, line, and sinker.
The narrative was less enthralling after she escapes to America, but I'm not much interested in the business world, so your mileage may vary on that particular point. She makes an effort to stretch the allure of young-freedom-fighter over her business ventures, but doesn't quite succeed. The book definitely divides into distinct halves - the life that led up to and resulted in Tiananmen, and what she did with herself after she got to the US. The latter half she talks as much about her coming to terms with her past abortions as she gives actual narrative. While that is certainly part of her story and shouldn't be dismissed, it seems to be part of a different story than the one you thought you were picking up.
I guess life does (thankfully) go on after you're in the vanguard of huge, possibly earth-shattering events, and it's hard to make that life sound as exciting and interesting as what everyone else thinks of as the climax.
She portrays herself as someone who pretty much just "ended up" leading the protest. She was just supporting her husband; other people wanted her there; she was the peacemaker/mediator between "little dictators". She paints herself as rather meek and innocent, a dedicated and dutiful wife/daughter/role X. Yet, even if you aren't aware of her controversial reputation, the facts that she tenaciously and successfully held onto her power in Tiananmen throughout major leadership struggles and later came to start and maintain her own business in a rather cut-throat environment in America suggest that she's more hard-nosed, strategic, and ambitious than she makes herself out to be. That isn't a bad thing necessarily. Personally, I thought it added another fascinating layer to the whole story, but it did highlight that you can't swallow her every word hook, line, and sinker.
The narrative was less enthralling after she escapes to America, but I'm not much interested in the business world, so your mileage may vary on that particular point. She makes an effort to stretch the allure of young-freedom-fighter over her business ventures, but doesn't quite succeed. The book definitely divides into distinct halves - the life that led up to and resulted in Tiananmen, and what she did with herself after she got to the US. The latter half she talks as much about her coming to terms with her past abortions as she gives actual narrative. While that is certainly part of her story and shouldn't be dismissed, it seems to be part of a different story than the one you thought you were picking up.
I guess life does (thankfully) go on after you're in the vanguard of huge, possibly earth-shattering events, and it's hard to make that life sound as exciting and interesting as what everyone else thinks of as the climax.
August 12, 2017
I enjoyed the book - including the last third. Unlike some of the other reviewers, I found the personal journey just as interesting as the perspective of involvement in such a momentous and dangerous political event.
I could understand the stiltedness of the recount and choice of what to include based on where her focus is now.
Initially I wondered why she wove in abortion in such a dispassionate way early on - but the latter part of the book explains why.
Making meaning of events in our life, especially traumatic ones is important and I appreciate knowing where she is at now psychologically rather than ending at a simple recount of events.
I am in awe of her bravery in China and the work she is doing now. I felt angry as a female that she felt and had to carry so much guilt about her choices and had to agonise so much about sharing them. I felt strongly that she didn't have to apologise and confess the way she did for those choices at all - but respect that it was part of her journey to need to do so. What a brave person!
I could understand the stiltedness of the recount and choice of what to include based on where her focus is now.
Initially I wondered why she wove in abortion in such a dispassionate way early on - but the latter part of the book explains why.
Making meaning of events in our life, especially traumatic ones is important and I appreciate knowing where she is at now psychologically rather than ending at a simple recount of events.
I am in awe of her bravery in China and the work she is doing now. I felt angry as a female that she felt and had to carry so much guilt about her choices and had to agonise so much about sharing them. I felt strongly that she didn't have to apologise and confess the way she did for those choices at all - but respect that it was part of her journey to need to do so. What a brave person!
November 29, 2012
“A Heart for Freedom” by Chai Ling is a brilliant and suspenseful account of her quest for freedom culminating in the Tiananmen Square massacre. Ms. Ling presented a masterful recollection of the situations and events concerning the freedom movement and her own personal involvement. Her thrust and commitment to the freedom movement was magnanimous. However, she vividly described the pain, tension and danger of being a woman in this movement for freedom. Although naive at times, Ms. Ling’s personal life was like a roller coaster ride. However, in time, she learned how to be inventive, and with great help, she managed to escape the malice of her capture. She also survived the pending onslaught of her demise. At the end, she discovered the greatest freedom of all, her personal relationship with the Lord. It is a blessed read.
October 24, 2019
I’ve been looking forward to reading A Heart for Freedom for years. Somehow, I had it in mind that this was a fictitious story, perhaps set in North Korea or China (obviously, I never even took a look at the synopsis!). This turned out a lot better than that, though. Nothing’s quite so good as non-fiction that teaches you history while you read!
Chai Ling went through so much as she was growing up and in her young adult years. Sometimes she had very little guidance from wiser adults, and that really ended up hurting her in the long run in some ways. She got involved in a political group when she was in her early twenties, and that quickly led to a hunger protest in Tiananmen Square asking for governmental reform. From there, the movement became an even larger event, with thousands of students begging for change—and Chai Ling became Commander in Chief of the operations.
I think my favorite part of this story was seeing the history come to life through Chai Ling’s narrative. I’m sure she didn’t handle everything the way she should have, but she did have an influential role in what happened there, and she was trying to initiate something good. Having not read or heard much from either side on this part of Chinese history, I found this “front-row” seat quite fascinating.
There were some things in the book that I didn’t agree with, and other parts I wished could be sped up somehow. It was all good, but some things were told about here that I don’t know where so necessary. I’m thankful to her editors for cutting the book down as far as they did (she said they halved it!!), but I almost wished it could have had a bit more pruning, because the last part of the book really seemed to drag.
Overall, though, if you’re interested in what happened at Tiananmen Square, I’d highly recommend you read at least that section of the book. That part kept my attention very well the whole way through!
Things you may want to know about: Sex outside of marriage and infidelity is mentioned several times, and several abortion stories are told (two are fairly graphic). The violence and killing at the square were told in as general of terminologies as possible, but there are a couple more graphic stories. Buddhist teaching and some rituals are described in a couple places.
I requested a free review copy of this book from NetGalley (thank you!), and this is my honest opinion of it.
Chai Ling went through so much as she was growing up and in her young adult years. Sometimes she had very little guidance from wiser adults, and that really ended up hurting her in the long run in some ways. She got involved in a political group when she was in her early twenties, and that quickly led to a hunger protest in Tiananmen Square asking for governmental reform. From there, the movement became an even larger event, with thousands of students begging for change—and Chai Ling became Commander in Chief of the operations.
I think my favorite part of this story was seeing the history come to life through Chai Ling’s narrative. I’m sure she didn’t handle everything the way she should have, but she did have an influential role in what happened there, and she was trying to initiate something good. Having not read or heard much from either side on this part of Chinese history, I found this “front-row” seat quite fascinating.
There were some things in the book that I didn’t agree with, and other parts I wished could be sped up somehow. It was all good, but some things were told about here that I don’t know where so necessary. I’m thankful to her editors for cutting the book down as far as they did (she said they halved it!!), but I almost wished it could have had a bit more pruning, because the last part of the book really seemed to drag.
Overall, though, if you’re interested in what happened at Tiananmen Square, I’d highly recommend you read at least that section of the book. That part kept my attention very well the whole way through!
Things you may want to know about: Sex outside of marriage and infidelity is mentioned several times, and several abortion stories are told (two are fairly graphic). The violence and killing at the square were told in as general of terminologies as possible, but there are a couple more graphic stories. Buddhist teaching and some rituals are described in a couple places.
I requested a free review copy of this book from NetGalley (thank you!), and this is my honest opinion of it.
July 2, 2024
A Heart For Freedom – by Chai Ling – Completed 03/25/2024
To my wife, J.E.M.; children, B.J.M.; A.N.C.; T.L.L. and their spouses.
Chai Ling's story during the Beijing Student Riots of 1989 is indeed a powerful and harrowing one, showcasing the struggle for democracy and freedom in the face of repression by the Chinese government.
During the protests in Tiananmen Square, Chai Ling emerged as a prominent figure, utilizing her leadership abilities and communication skills to galvanize support for the movement, particularly through her impactful speeches advocating for the hunger strike. The protests, fueled by dissatisfaction with the lack of democracy and freedoms in China, attracted hundreds of students from across the country to gather in the square. However, the Chinese government, unwilling to yield to the demands of the protesters, eventually resorted to a violent crackdown. In June 1989, tanks rolled into Tiananmen Square, resulting in the deaths of numerous demonstrators. Chai Ling, being one of the leaders targeted by the government, was forced to go underground to evade arrest and escape the country.
Her story sheds light on the oppressive nature of the Chinese Communist government and the lengths it would go to suppress dissent and maintain control. Chai Ling's courage and resilience in the face of such adversity serve as a testament to the human spirit's quest for freedom and justice.
In the student chapters, the drive of Chai Ling and other students to try and overcome the government and facility indoctrination, to stand up for freedom and democracy is very powerful. I wonder how much more our country can take by the current same oppressive government and universities facility before the students realize where the country has gone and begin to rise up again.
In China, the ruling party, the government and the people’s congress ruling party do not represent the people’s will. This is the result of the corrupt government, corrupt politicians and the corrupt legal system.Is this the USA direction?
Love Dad, T.R.M.
To my wife, J.E.M.; children, B.J.M.; A.N.C.; T.L.L. and their spouses.
Chai Ling's story during the Beijing Student Riots of 1989 is indeed a powerful and harrowing one, showcasing the struggle for democracy and freedom in the face of repression by the Chinese government.
During the protests in Tiananmen Square, Chai Ling emerged as a prominent figure, utilizing her leadership abilities and communication skills to galvanize support for the movement, particularly through her impactful speeches advocating for the hunger strike. The protests, fueled by dissatisfaction with the lack of democracy and freedoms in China, attracted hundreds of students from across the country to gather in the square. However, the Chinese government, unwilling to yield to the demands of the protesters, eventually resorted to a violent crackdown. In June 1989, tanks rolled into Tiananmen Square, resulting in the deaths of numerous demonstrators. Chai Ling, being one of the leaders targeted by the government, was forced to go underground to evade arrest and escape the country.
Her story sheds light on the oppressive nature of the Chinese Communist government and the lengths it would go to suppress dissent and maintain control. Chai Ling's courage and resilience in the face of such adversity serve as a testament to the human spirit's quest for freedom and justice.
In the student chapters, the drive of Chai Ling and other students to try and overcome the government and facility indoctrination, to stand up for freedom and democracy is very powerful. I wonder how much more our country can take by the current same oppressive government and universities facility before the students realize where the country has gone and begin to rise up again.
In China, the ruling party, the government and the people’s congress ruling party do not represent the people’s will. This is the result of the corrupt government, corrupt politicians and the corrupt legal system.Is this the USA direction?
Love Dad, T.R.M.
December 28, 2017
I had never been taught about this massacre in school, and it bothered me when I found out about it only a few years ago. I am in my 30s and was alive during the Tiananmen Square Massacre, though quite young at the time. Regardless, I feel like it is something I should have been taught about in school.
Chai Ling is now a Christian living in the US working for All Girls Allowed, trying to save the girls throughout Asian nations that are looked down upon, sold into sexual slavery, and more. I had been aware of her organization before I found out about her survival from the massacre!
A few yeras ago I saw the documentary that Chai Ling mentioned in this book. I actually found her brilliant in that documentary and I did not look down at her or read things in the way that she says many had from it about her. She made me very curious to want to research the massacre more.
It was later that I realized that the founder of All Girls Allowed and the student leader from the protests and such were one in the same!! I think that is what I liked best about the story. It is great to piece things together like that and see the connection.
She was very honest in her story and told things from her past that were obviously very difficult, especially the relationships she had during her college years. It was great getting to learn about her her family as well..
If you are not a Christian, I think some of this may be difficult to listen to, but have an understanding of the person that she once was and the person she has become. It is definitely great to see that she still has a great passion and is still an amazing speaker!!!
Chai Ling is now a Christian living in the US working for All Girls Allowed, trying to save the girls throughout Asian nations that are looked down upon, sold into sexual slavery, and more. I had been aware of her organization before I found out about her survival from the massacre!
A few yeras ago I saw the documentary that Chai Ling mentioned in this book. I actually found her brilliant in that documentary and I did not look down at her or read things in the way that she says many had from it about her. She made me very curious to want to research the massacre more.
It was later that I realized that the founder of All Girls Allowed and the student leader from the protests and such were one in the same!! I think that is what I liked best about the story. It is great to piece things together like that and see the connection.
She was very honest in her story and told things from her past that were obviously very difficult, especially the relationships she had during her college years. It was great getting to learn about her her family as well..
If you are not a Christian, I think some of this may be difficult to listen to, but have an understanding of the person that she once was and the person she has become. It is definitely great to see that she still has a great passion and is still an amazing speaker!!!
April 29, 2023
Highly recommend for anyone who values freedom, while there are some matters that irk me in this book her connection early on to Clinton, Pelosi, Edward Kennedy and Romney and Bush and her talking of early communists as if admirable and also talk of the KMT or a reference to them in regards to corruption and her early abortions and using Mandela despite the fawning over him of his true character.nor her fawning over some Chinese officials. However one feels about her you cannot neglect the main theme of the Book is Fighting tyranny although I do not approve of the ghandi-esque approach she later espouses. The book rings as true today even more so with all the events that have transpired just as when the book was published yet Here we are sadly. She reminds the world of the evil of the one child policy and what Communism despite so-called reform really entails.
February 4, 2017
This book held my interest throughout. It was well written and gives and inside look at what happened during the student protests at Tiananmen Square in Beijing in 1989. It follows the aftermath of the resulting massacre by the army. The author goes into hiding and eventually escapes making her way to Hong Kong, Paris, and finally the United States. She provides an intimate look a life in communist China and their controlled society, especially for girls and women. She becomes disillusioned about the democracy movement in China for a time and then finds strength to overcome through religion. Recommended for anyone interested in Chinese society under communism, women's issues in China and elsewhere, and learning how some people deal with adversity.
February 15, 2019
Chai Ling is a woman with so much courage. This book is so inspiring; you must read this book to have a complete understanding of what women in China go through to survive. Chai Ling tells the entire story of Tiananmen Square; her leadership skills and her ability to stand in the face of danger. I have a respect for women of China like never before. You will hear about sexism and judgement that you never really knew existed and most certainly never existed in you. You will read about decisions that Chai Ling was faced with that no one should ever have to face. You will read about her salvation that is so beautiful you will be thinking about it days later. I highly recommend this book. It is beautiful.
February 16, 2020
This is an account of the journey of one woman from the confines of Communist China to freedom in the USA. China's demand for high achievers academically and competition for the few coveted places in universities overshadowed the emotional development young people in other countries usually go through. Because of the one-child policy, and associated abortions and killing of newly-born females, China has an imbalance of males to females and many of those men will never find wives.
It is an explanation of the Tiananmen protest from one of its leaders, and a description of how the Chinese government killed and imprisoned the students who joined the passive movement.
Chai Ling also describes her conversion to Christianity and the changes it has made in her life.
It is an explanation of the Tiananmen protest from one of its leaders, and a description of how the Chinese government killed and imprisoned the students who joined the passive movement.
Chai Ling also describes her conversion to Christianity and the changes it has made in her life.
February 2, 2023
What amazes me most about the majority of these reviews is how offended people are by her discussing her faith. If it were Buddhism, Muslim, Judaism, or Wiccan, would that have made it more palatable to you?
If this is her faith, and was a major part of her life, then it follows she would mention it during her memoir (duh!)
I agree, the book was slow at times and many of the negative events in her life were all given the same emotional weight so that they either all blended together.
I did like the explanation of her early life and her parents’-I thought that explained a lot of her decisions and actions and added to the story.
In the end though it jumped around a lot and was oddly written
If this is her faith, and was a major part of her life, then it follows she would mention it during her memoir (duh!)
I agree, the book was slow at times and many of the negative events in her life were all given the same emotional weight so that they either all blended together.
I did like the explanation of her early life and her parents’-I thought that explained a lot of her decisions and actions and added to the story.
In the end though it jumped around a lot and was oddly written
December 12, 2025
There may be some haters (maybe even in my own household) but I thought this was a powerful and intimate look into the student leadership during the Tiananmen student protests and massacre; and I think also great insight to the struggles of women in China during this period!
Look, is this book functionally a recruitment source to evangelize the readers? 100% — but it’s obvious from jump, the faith-based publisher, the forward that is just a psalm, the first and last chapter that basically are call-to-action, etc. but it’s obviously important to Ling and how she is able to cope with some of the horrors she endured.
Anyway; weird as hell as an audiobook being read by what felt like Plankton’s supercomputer, but an interesting narrative nonetheless; I don’t love that the trauma of forced abortions per One Child Policy and oppressive male favoritism gets re-framed as an anti-Christian narrative, but I guess I get it? I can’t believe Jesus would be mad at a woman for not having bodily autonomy in a super aggressive patriarchal system, he’d be mad at the boys, tbh!
Look, is this book functionally a recruitment source to evangelize the readers? 100% — but it’s obvious from jump, the faith-based publisher, the forward that is just a psalm, the first and last chapter that basically are call-to-action, etc. but it’s obviously important to Ling and how she is able to cope with some of the horrors she endured.
Anyway; weird as hell as an audiobook being read by what felt like Plankton’s supercomputer, but an interesting narrative nonetheless; I don’t love that the trauma of forced abortions per One Child Policy and oppressive male favoritism gets re-framed as an anti-Christian narrative, but I guess I get it? I can’t believe Jesus would be mad at a woman for not having bodily autonomy in a super aggressive patriarchal system, he’d be mad at the boys, tbh!
June 11, 2018
honestly, a wonderful book.. very open, detailed... and honest.. the only reason for the lower stars is... the last several chapters reverted to proselytizing. The anti-abortion info I could pass by without an issue.. as even as someone who is pro-choice I understand that what they dealt with was NOT choice.. they were forced... the Buddhism chapters... once again.. it was a way to find relief.. letting go of the past and living in this moment.. neither of these felt like attempts to make me follow them... then EVERYTHING became about religion. even asking if the reader is willing to accept Jesus.. I feel the end detracted from the rest of the book..
September 1, 2020
This book really touched my heart, and will take a while to process. A recommendation by my mom, that took me probably 6 years to get around to reading, but I am glad I finally did.
I think I am still processing a lot of the grief and sadness she mentioned. I am so glad she took the time to share her story. I rated it four stars, not because I am rating what God has done in her life as 4 stars or in any way to dismiss her story. Only, I felt that to have understood the work better, I ought to have had a more clear understanding of Chinese cultural history, and that it would function better in combination with more historical explanations.
I think I am still processing a lot of the grief and sadness she mentioned. I am so glad she took the time to share her story. I rated it four stars, not because I am rating what God has done in her life as 4 stars or in any way to dismiss her story. Only, I felt that to have understood the work better, I ought to have had a more clear understanding of Chinese cultural history, and that it would function better in combination with more historical explanations.
July 5, 2021
Excellent autobiography on the challenges growing up in China post cultural revolution, the inside story of the students' protests at Tiananmen Square, the Chinese military massacre of the Chinese people in Beijing, escape out of China and subsequent pro-China news stories by the American press of the Tiananmen massacre blaming students and supporting the Chinese government narrative. Additionally a great story arriving in the USA with nothing and rising to contribute to American society and economic health. Well written.
May 22, 2020
The stuff about the student-demonstrations and the events leading up to the drama at the Tiananmen Square is super interesting, but the book took forever to read. How often can one's heart break in a single book? How often can you use the word "onzettend" (incredibly)? The heavy christian tone of the last +/- 100 pages didn't really work for me either, nor did the "are you ready to follow Jesus" in the last paragraph.
August 20, 2020
By being smuggled out of China, Tiananmen Square comes alive through the eyes of a highly-visible leader and speaker of the student movement. Besides recounting the bloody democratic push of China's young elite college students, Chai Ling vents her other frustrations with the communist system through her own personal story. I learned a bunch about the land of my fifth child and am extremely thankful for the author's present push to expose the horrifying way the government handles population control. She is a woman full of courage and a warrior for truth and freedom.
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