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Vulgarian Rhapsody
A whirlwind tour of San Francisco’s fabled queer bohemia in the waning days of the 20th century, as the city’s budget bon vivants work to save their eccentric lifestyles in the face of tech gentrification by LAMBDA award finalist Alvin Orloff. Harris, San Francisco’s most annoying gay barfly, doesn’t mean to be bitchy, passive aggressive, or insulting. But he’s so bedazzled by his own critical brilliance he feels morally obliged to share his scathing opinions with the world at any and every opportunity. This irritates no one more than his roommate, Maxine, an avant-garde transsexual cabaret singer. When she overhears him badmouthing her on the phone she flies into a rage and expels him from their apartment. This crisis couldn’t come at a worse time. The year is 1999 and the “dot com” boom has rendered cheap housing nonexistent, and Harris, who works as a part-time telemarketer, is—as usual—low on funds. Will he be able to convince one of his eccentric, semi-dysfunctional friends with a rent-controlled apartment to let him move in? Vulgarian Rhapsody immerses readers in a fading bohemia of queer dive bars, drag clubs, and countercultural cafes. The book’s narrator (a longtime frenemy of Harris who’s every bit as snarky and annoying as he is) tells the story with sadistic relish and an ironist’s eye for the absurd. Anyone feeling sickly from too many uplifting stories of personal empowerment, precious coming-of-age tales, or sugarcoated romances will find the perfect antidote in this hilariously acidic comedy of manners. A must-read for fans of Brontez Purnell, Phillippe Besson, and Ryan O’Connell.
212 pages, Paperback
Published October 17, 2023
3 people are currently reading
2200 people want to read
About the author
Alvin Orloff
8 books140 followersAlvin Orloff began writing in 1977 as the teenage lyricist for The Blowdryers, an early San Francisco Punk band. He spent the 1980s dabbling in avant garde theater, underground cabaret, performance art, and nightclub DJing before remembering all he ever wanted to be was a writer. His memoir, "Disasterama!: Adventures in the Queer Underground 1977 - 1997," an alternately hilarious and heartbreaking coming-of-age-story set during a time when youthful exuberance and flippancy collided with the deadly seriousness of homophobia and AIDS, was nominated for the Lambda Literary Award in gay memoir. He is also the author of four novels: I Married an Earthling, Gutter Boys, Why Aren't You Smiling? and most recently, Vulgarian Rhapsody.
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Displaying 1 - 22 of 22 reviews
May 7, 2024
Delightful, hilarious, yet incredibly incisive and astute. I bought this book within my first hour in San Francisco at Dog Eared Books, only to learn it was written by a local legend and employee of the next bookstore on my list to visit that day, Fabulosa Books. While at first, I found it to be merely written in a fun, bitchy, rhapsodic literary style, as the narrative progressed, I found myself doing something few books these days make me do: slow down and savour each and every word. I was re-reading chapters, going over clever passages again, and even writing down some of my favourite techniques Orloff used to keep the book simultaneously light-hearted yet critical. Overall, I am sad to bid farewell to Harris, Maxine, and the cast of hilarious side characters who are interjected throughout this simple tale. Yet, what compels me most to likely revisit this book again and again is not just the sheer joy derived from reading it but the utter fascination exploring the inner workings of the "vulgarian" within all of us. As the afterword put it:
"We are all destined to encounter a few Harrises on life's highway. Such creatures are ravenous for company and you may be tempted to befriend one, for they can be most amusing, but do so at your own peril. At first Harris will seem harmless, perhaps even charming. This will not last. Your Harris, like all Harrises, wants desperately to pull you down into whatever dark, fetid Hell he has fashioned for himself that you might share his ceaseless torments and afflictions. Resisting would be easy except that (horrible truth!) we all have a little Harris inside us yearning for just such a fate. No, kind and gentle reader, when you encounter a Harris, you must smile politely and be on your way, else you will soon learn what it is to dwell amongst the damned."
I'm glad such a book exists for my inner bitchy, critical, pretentious, and obnoxious Vulgarian to spread its wings, but I'm equally glad such a book provides the clean 200-word containment and mythical moral conclusion to keep my inner Vulgarian beast at bay.
"We are all destined to encounter a few Harrises on life's highway. Such creatures are ravenous for company and you may be tempted to befriend one, for they can be most amusing, but do so at your own peril. At first Harris will seem harmless, perhaps even charming. This will not last. Your Harris, like all Harrises, wants desperately to pull you down into whatever dark, fetid Hell he has fashioned for himself that you might share his ceaseless torments and afflictions. Resisting would be easy except that (horrible truth!) we all have a little Harris inside us yearning for just such a fate. No, kind and gentle reader, when you encounter a Harris, you must smile politely and be on your way, else you will soon learn what it is to dwell amongst the damned."
I'm glad such a book exists for my inner bitchy, critical, pretentious, and obnoxious Vulgarian to spread its wings, but I'm equally glad such a book provides the clean 200-word containment and mythical moral conclusion to keep my inner Vulgarian beast at bay.
Read
October 21, 2023I know something about vulgarians. I'm snooty, like Harris, the main, misanthropic character at the heart of this late 20th century bohemian bon bon. It's spiky, as Harris can hurtfully tell it like it is, and seems to deserve his fate. It's a San Francisco that doesn't exist any more, all the more reason to pay it a visit.
November 9, 2023
I received this through LibraryThing Early Readers.
I wasn’t sure what to expect, but the title intrigued me.
This is the tale of Harris, a complex person with many facets. He can be seen around town day or night in department stores sampling colognes, high-end haberdasheries critiquing clothing, dive bars and house parties offering up his cynical opinions and partaking of the free food and booze. Harris is an overly opinionated and gay barfly. But there is something about Harris that keeps people interested in him.
The narrator tells of the lives and times of the citizens in San Francisco’s gay neighbourhood around in 1999. Things are changing in the area. Cheap apartments are no more as the dot com bubble is growing. Techie types with increasing income are taking over and the rents are rising at a rapid rate.
Harris earns his income doing phone surveys, when he shows up to work. Harris rents the couch of a friend for a place to live. When she gives him notice to move, due to his sporadic rent payments, Harris is in a bind for a place to live. An apartment of his own is out of budget.
The various people in Harris’ world and the style of the narrator and his additional comments on the changes of their world, make for an entertaining read!
I wasn’t sure what to expect, but the title intrigued me.
This is the tale of Harris, a complex person with many facets. He can be seen around town day or night in department stores sampling colognes, high-end haberdasheries critiquing clothing, dive bars and house parties offering up his cynical opinions and partaking of the free food and booze. Harris is an overly opinionated and gay barfly. But there is something about Harris that keeps people interested in him.
The narrator tells of the lives and times of the citizens in San Francisco’s gay neighbourhood around in 1999. Things are changing in the area. Cheap apartments are no more as the dot com bubble is growing. Techie types with increasing income are taking over and the rents are rising at a rapid rate.
Harris earns his income doing phone surveys, when he shows up to work. Harris rents the couch of a friend for a place to live. When she gives him notice to move, due to his sporadic rent payments, Harris is in a bind for a place to live. An apartment of his own is out of budget.
The various people in Harris’ world and the style of the narrator and his additional comments on the changes of their world, make for an entertaining read!
November 28, 2024
3.5/5
fun and funny!
an ode to the queer & quaint world of san francisco’s gay bohemia in its dying days; a meditation on bad art, good taste, & class non-struggle that cloaks its melancholy with humor; a quick, bitchy, and delightful read
fun and funny!
an ode to the queer & quaint world of san francisco’s gay bohemia in its dying days; a meditation on bad art, good taste, & class non-struggle that cloaks its melancholy with humor; a quick, bitchy, and delightful read
February 15, 2024
Always fun to read about San Francisco, and this captured a history and perspective I haven’t read before - a little bit like Tales of the City, but edgier. Not the strongest writing/plot, but there were some lines that legitimately made me laugh out loud. It sort of feels like this was written as a revenge on someone the author didn’t like - their “Harris” so to speak. I was entertained though!!
January 15, 2024
A sassy snark-filled romp through end-of-millenium SF. I imagined the narrator as Armistead Maupin’s bitter, self-indulgent doppelgänger. Bonus points the nested fairytale. A fun reading kickoff for 2024.
September 9, 2023
What a great read!!!! Harris is one of those people that you may or may not want around you. He's mostly pretty disagreeable and hardly ever a good word for anyone. He's sharing an apartment with Maxine, a vocal and theatrical performance artist, and they have a huge argument over the rent not being paid. The multiple storylines mesh very well to create an engaging read. I highly recommend this book for anyone that would like a read that is a bit out of the norm. I won an ARC from Three Rooms Press and Goodreads. Thank you for allowing me to read and review.
December 28, 2023
I'm already an Orloff fan, but as much as I was anticipating this book's release, my expectations have been exceeded once again! In Vulgarian Rhapsody, the author egolessly and hilariously educates the reader on a low-rent attention-seeking sub culture while Harris the protagonist, a seemingly inconsequential (but very toxic) energy vampire lurks around every corner. Gold!
June 10, 2024
A Bohemian comedy of manners that follows the day to day dramas swirling around the deliciously detestable protagonist. Imagine Lady Susan but in Y2K San Francisco.
I was laughing out loud at the playfully scathing prose, peppered with passages like this:
"It was quite a blow, then, when his application to fashion school was rejected. Harris then fell back on Plan B: indifferently laboring at a string of dead-end jobs while wallowing in a toxic morass of petulance and self-pity."
I was laughing out loud at the playfully scathing prose, peppered with passages like this:
"It was quite a blow, then, when his application to fashion school was rejected. Harris then fell back on Plan B: indifferently laboring at a string of dead-end jobs while wallowing in a toxic morass of petulance and self-pity."
September 5, 2024
Real Rating: 3.5* of five
The Publisher Says: A whirlwind tour of San Francisco’s fabled queer bohemia in the waning days of the 20th century, as the city’s budget bon vivants work to save their eccentric lifestyles in the face of tech gentrification by LAMBDA award finalist Alvin Orloff.
Harris, San Francisco’s most annoying gay barfly, doesn’t mean to be bitchy, passive aggressive, or insulting. But he’s so bedazzled by his own critical brilliance he feels morally obliged to share his scathing opinions with the world at any and every opportunity. This irritates no one more than his roommate, Maxine, an avant-garde transsexual cabaret singer. When she overhears him badmouthing her on the phone she flies into a rage and expels him from their apartment.
This crisis couldn’t come at a worse time. The year is 1999 and the “dot com” boom has rendered cheap housing nonexistent, and Harris, who works as a part-time telemarketer, is—as usual—low on funds. Will he be able to convince one of his eccentric, semi-dysfunctional friends with a rent-controlled apartment to let him move in?
Vulgarian Rhapsody immerses readers in a fading bohemia of queer dive bars, drag clubs, and countercultural cafes. The book’s narrator (a longtime frenemy of Harris who’s every bit as snarky and annoying as he is) tells the story with sadistic relish and an ironist’s eye for the absurd. Anyone feeling sickly from too many uplifting stories of personal empowerment, precious coming-of-age tales, or sugarcoated romances will find the perfect antidote in this hilariously acidic comedy of manners. A must-read for fans of Brontez Purnell, Philippe Besson, and Ryan O’Connell.
I RECEIVED A DRC FROM THE PUBLISHER VIA EDELWEISS+. THANK YOU.
My Review: Have you ever wondered what would happen if Armistead Maupin had written Tales of the City in the 1990s, focused it on the (non-existent) lovechild of Truman Capote and Sylvia Miles, and done it when he was coming off a meth binge? Just me, then?
This is what would've happened...this bitter acerbic slacker story about a San Francisco as gone, as forever and irretrievably gone, as my New York is. So this is swingin' for my sweet spot, nostalgia plus perspective multiplied by anger at the heedless waste of it all.
I had to stop at three-and-a-half stars because, as I was reading bits aloud to Rob on a Zoom, he kept saying, "that's really obscure" and "why do you think that's funny, exactly?" So it's aimed at me, but the blast radius is quite small.
Three Rooms Press asks a piddling $9.99 for a Kindle edition. Go, fellow oldsters! Buy!
The Publisher Says: A whirlwind tour of San Francisco’s fabled queer bohemia in the waning days of the 20th century, as the city’s budget bon vivants work to save their eccentric lifestyles in the face of tech gentrification by LAMBDA award finalist Alvin Orloff.
Harris, San Francisco’s most annoying gay barfly, doesn’t mean to be bitchy, passive aggressive, or insulting. But he’s so bedazzled by his own critical brilliance he feels morally obliged to share his scathing opinions with the world at any and every opportunity. This irritates no one more than his roommate, Maxine, an avant-garde transsexual cabaret singer. When she overhears him badmouthing her on the phone she flies into a rage and expels him from their apartment.
This crisis couldn’t come at a worse time. The year is 1999 and the “dot com” boom has rendered cheap housing nonexistent, and Harris, who works as a part-time telemarketer, is—as usual—low on funds. Will he be able to convince one of his eccentric, semi-dysfunctional friends with a rent-controlled apartment to let him move in?
Vulgarian Rhapsody immerses readers in a fading bohemia of queer dive bars, drag clubs, and countercultural cafes. The book’s narrator (a longtime frenemy of Harris who’s every bit as snarky and annoying as he is) tells the story with sadistic relish and an ironist’s eye for the absurd. Anyone feeling sickly from too many uplifting stories of personal empowerment, precious coming-of-age tales, or sugarcoated romances will find the perfect antidote in this hilariously acidic comedy of manners. A must-read for fans of Brontez Purnell, Philippe Besson, and Ryan O’Connell.
I RECEIVED A DRC FROM THE PUBLISHER VIA EDELWEISS+. THANK YOU.
My Review: Have you ever wondered what would happen if Armistead Maupin had written Tales of the City in the 1990s, focused it on the (non-existent) lovechild of Truman Capote and Sylvia Miles, and done it when he was coming off a meth binge? Just me, then?
This is what would've happened...this bitter acerbic slacker story about a San Francisco as gone, as forever and irretrievably gone, as my New York is. So this is swingin' for my sweet spot, nostalgia plus perspective multiplied by anger at the heedless waste of it all.
I had to stop at three-and-a-half stars because, as I was reading bits aloud to Rob on a Zoom, he kept saying, "that's really obscure" and "why do you think that's funny, exactly?" So it's aimed at me, but the blast radius is quite small.
Three Rooms Press asks a piddling $9.99 for a Kindle edition. Go, fellow oldsters! Buy!
February 14, 2024
Harris is a portrait of a witty, perhaps even talented, artist who just can't get out of his own way and allows his critical voice to take over and become his main voice. He sometimes performs on stage, and he often attends people's *things*, but most of the time he boozes and complains, complains, complains. The big arc of this story involves him getting kicked out of his apartment by his roommate Maxine -- who is possibly less witty and perhaps even a less talented performer, but who sticks with her shtick and doesn't allow the self-criticism to bowl her over -- and then he goes through a short list of his friends in an attempt to find another sublet, but fails miserably. This book was hilarious and sad, full of wonderful insights about art, music, literature, queer culture, drag, San Francisco, and even working in a dead-end office job. So good!
July 18, 2024
It got me in a gloomy mood. I started thinking about my own embarrassing Harris moments I'd like to take back. Not that I'm as Harris as Harris ... maybe just the Harris who can't see himself as others do, or the Harris no one wants to be around, or the Harris who kills people's Joy. I mean I hope I'm not like that. it's just that, like Orloff says in the Afterword, We all have a little Harris inside us.
So besides the anxiety provoking parts of the story where there's a lot of destructive behavior - I liked Orloff's humor. I loved his descriptions of the period of time in San Francisco. I was that age, in San Francisco, and hung out with some partiers and bohemians ... I know all about the fog, public transportation, and the neighborhoods.
So besides the anxiety provoking parts of the story where there's a lot of destructive behavior - I liked Orloff's humor. I loved his descriptions of the period of time in San Francisco. I was that age, in San Francisco, and hung out with some partiers and bohemians ... I know all about the fog, public transportation, and the neighborhoods.
December 29, 2023
3.5 stars, rounded up.
The main character of this book, Harris, is by far one of the most annoying characters in history. He walks through people’s lives insulting them and making them feel low. He doesn’t go to his job because he decided to go see a friend’s play—which he didn’t even like or really want to see. Then, after he gets kicked out his apartment for not paying rent, he acted like he was a victim. Hell, he even burned down a guy’s room and didn’t even know about it, or care.
Having said all of that, I did enjoy reading this book, mostly because of the author’s voice. But I was definitely glad it only lasted 200 pages.
The main character of this book, Harris, is by far one of the most annoying characters in history. He walks through people’s lives insulting them and making them feel low. He doesn’t go to his job because he decided to go see a friend’s play—which he didn’t even like or really want to see. Then, after he gets kicked out his apartment for not paying rent, he acted like he was a victim. Hell, he even burned down a guy’s room and didn’t even know about it, or care.
Having said all of that, I did enjoy reading this book, mostly because of the author’s voice. But I was definitely glad it only lasted 200 pages.
May 13, 2024
San Francisco was full of gems; this is maybe the funniest thing ever. Harris is a person against whose life I feel infinitely better about my own, as Orloff evidently intended. I'm sorry to part ways with him but know he'll always be there should I need a laugh.
ps. Sam's review of this book says it all and more I implore you to read it!!
ps. Sam's review of this book says it all and more I implore you to read it!!
September 16, 2024
I really enjoyed reading this book! I haven’t been to San Francisco but Orloff’s writing took me right back to 1999 bohemian SF, like I was right there when the story took place. The writing was fun and I liked the point of view of a ‘narrator’, who told us the tales of one insufferable Harris. The story wasn’t revelatory nor was it groundbreaking, but I thoroughly enjoyed it nonetheless!
December 2, 2023
Like a modern day Thackeray, author Orloff captures 1990s San Francisco with a sharp satirical edge. Desperate characters always seeking affordable rent, artists with more ambition than talent, and personal rivalries pack the slim volume with underworld panache.
March 28, 2024
Not a terribly strong plot in this book but is a collection of eclectic stories and conversations involving a handful of thirty-something year olds in SF. Would be nice if the writing tied together storylines more or if it was slightly less dialogue-based.
November 16, 2023
Enjoyed this slice-of-life novel that drops in and out of Harris' story.
December 20, 2023
There is nothing more tragic than a pretentious (& toxic) twinky club kid who has reached a certain age, but adamantly denies the realities of that age. Enter: Harris.
February 12, 2025
Interesting as a gay historical time capsule of 90s SF, but the breaking-the-4th-wall parts are cringe and the ending was rushed.
April 5, 2024
(I received a free copy of the book in exchange for an honest review.)
Vulgarian Rhapsody offers a slice-of-life look at roommates Harris, a fortyish gay man who's never figured out what to do with his life beyond being (as the book says) a "Party Person", and Maxine, a fiftyish trans woman who still considers herself an "aspiring" singer and actress. It's also a window into the queer community of San Francisco in the late '90s, recently ravaged by AIDS and about to be further trampled by tech industry-driven gentrification.
The book is zippy and funny, with a touch of Austen pastiche to the narrative voice. It's firmly in the school of comedy where the point is to watch terrible and somewhat pathetic people be hoist by their own petards, but it's not without a certain wistful affection for its now-vanished milieu. It has no plot to speak of, and its sense of humor won't be for everybody, but it's an enjoyable afternoon's worth of reading for anyone who does enjoy watching self-absorbed people self-sabotage, especially if you also have an interest in recent LGBTQ history.
Vulgarian Rhapsody offers a slice-of-life look at roommates Harris, a fortyish gay man who's never figured out what to do with his life beyond being (as the book says) a "Party Person", and Maxine, a fiftyish trans woman who still considers herself an "aspiring" singer and actress. It's also a window into the queer community of San Francisco in the late '90s, recently ravaged by AIDS and about to be further trampled by tech industry-driven gentrification.
The book is zippy and funny, with a touch of Austen pastiche to the narrative voice. It's firmly in the school of comedy where the point is to watch terrible and somewhat pathetic people be hoist by their own petards, but it's not without a certain wistful affection for its now-vanished milieu. It has no plot to speak of, and its sense of humor won't be for everybody, but it's an enjoyable afternoon's worth of reading for anyone who does enjoy watching self-absorbed people self-sabotage, especially if you also have an interest in recent LGBTQ history.
February 14, 2024
This book was such a fun little trip! I love how we get to hop into the mind of a pretentious jerk, and we don't end up feeling bad for him in the slightest.
Displaying 1 - 22 of 22 reviews