A More Perfect Union: How I Survived the Happiest Day of My Life

by Hana Schank

Hana Schank had never given much thought to her wedding, or to marriage in general, for that matter. That, is until she found herself newly engaged and trying to plan the "Happiest Day of Her Life": spending weeks crafting save-the-date cards, worrying incessantly about every minute detail -- even matching her cocktails to her wedding colors -- and obsessively reading Martha Stewart Weddings magazine. Hana soon decides that if she is going to follow traditions like wearing white and walking down the aisle with flowers, she wants to know why. In her search, she turns up several interesting wedding facts and ultimately casts a critical eye on a $72 billion wedding industry that pressures women into becoming obsessive-compulsive Bridezillas.

Part confessional memoir, part social critique, A More Perfect Union chronicles a year of wedding planning, capturing as it does not only the stresses but also the undoubted joys of becoming a bride.

Genres: Memoir, Nonfiction

224 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2006

Reviews

[Samantha · Rating 3 out of 5]

This probably would have been even more helpful earlier in my wedding planning process, but ah well. The author still had a bigger wedding than I intend to, but it was nice to hear that, no matter what you do, you end up a little crazy, things will stress you out, and the wedding industry is insane.

[Angela · Rating 4 out of 5]

I just love this book. The points Hana made throughout the book just made me smile. How even the girls that DON'T want to become obsessed about their wedding, do - mostly because of everything that is thrown at a bride to be -- literally hundreds of bridal magazines/books/tv shows etc. I am a bit of a crafty person, so, I thought I could do my own programs - and I did, and they came out nice, except for a few typos...but the night before the wedding, everyone that was staying at our house were folding tying ribbons for said programs, and my husband to be was trying to get our computer printer to PRINT FASTER!! We ended up having more than enough...but -- what a hassle.

The gal I am passing the book on to is also one that didn't want to get sucked in -- however, time found her threading beads for part of the centerpieces.

And we all end up with Princess Dresses -- Mine was red though....and I remember going into the bridal shop and saying I wanted a red dress, and they would bring me lovely white dresses, with a bit of red here, and a bit of red there. But, I persevered and got what I wanted!! a RED dress.

Anyway, good story, well written, and it all ends well -- so YEAH!!!

[Beth · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book was all that "One Perfect Day" was not. Just an autobiographical account of one thirty year old woman in New York trying to navigate the wedding planning process, and watching with horror as she turned into everything she hated. Nothing could be more relatable at this moment, from the fondue set at the engagement to china decisions to the scare factor associated with the website The Knot. Schank has loosely woven facts about the wedding industry into her story, and has succeeded, because the book has a good flow to it. A quick read, but a nice reminder that this is only temporary insanity.

[Gigi · Rating 4 out of 5]

My mom gave this book to me as an engagement present :-) She knows I am a little scared of the Bridezilla WIC phenomenon, but she also handed it over with a smirk and said "Bridezilla happens, even to people like you" And it was hilarious b/c I totally related to Hana, and have even had little bits of the book flash back at me as all of a sudden I start hyperventilating about table settings...WTH? I don't care about table settings! Overall, I thought it was fun, a little poke in the ribs at the industry and a reminder that Bridezilla does happen, but with a little humor hopefully we can hope to keep her from taking over!

[Jessica · Rating 4 out of 5]

I found this book HILAROUSLY laugh out loud funny. But then again I'm not engaged, nor ever plan to be. And I can assure you of this, I will NEVER plan a wedding and if I had thought about it before, this book shot that idea to hell.

My sister in law, incidentally also loved this book and she was engaged at the time. My best friend did not find it amusing, when I handed it to her after she announced her engagement.

Whether you like weddings or not, you'll love the author - she's endearing, funny and witty.

[Michelle · Rating 4 out of 5]

The author describes how she and her Jewish fiance sort of arbitrarily chose which traditions to include in their wedding, and how they had to battle family members' expectations. Also includes interesting trivia about how certain traditions came about, such as the best man (to help the groom abduct the bride) and the honeymoon (hide for a month from enraged bride's father in a cave, drinking honey-flavored wine?), etc.

[Michelle · Rating 3 out of 5]

After my own wedding I was going through the wedding blues and was searching for something. I ran across this book, and it was just what I needed. It details all the ups and downs and near disasters of one bride. It made me laugh at her and at all brides out there. It put the whole wedding situation in perspective: it is one day, many of the traditions are silly, and life goes on after the Wedding Day!

[Karenclifford61 · Rating 3 out of 5]

While the author pretends she wants a "simple" wedding, she doesn't necessarily convey this attitude in her planning process. I beleive every wedding has a story and this author was smart enough to capitalize on the cravings of most brides-to-be. Some knowledge of jewish and wedding tradiions was shared but not enough to be a valuable reference. I imagine if was getting married I would rate this much higher.

[Les · Rating 3 out of 5]

The wedding industry conspires to turn perfectly sane, normal women into Bridezillas, who care deeply about colors, flowers, the perfect ribbon, and save-the-date cards. Hana started out caring mostly about her marriage, and ended up struggling against being sucked into making the wedding "the most perfect day" and "the happiest day" of her life. Hilarious, real, and all-too-true. It'll make married women everywhere grateful to have this part of their lives over.

[Joanna Jacob · Rating 2 out of 5]

This was an interesting tale of getting caught up in wedding planning, and trying not to. I feel like now, there is a lot more discussion of this type of subject (since any critique of the wedding industry out there, I am banging through them, and didn't find anything in this book to be all that new to me.) It was likely very innovative at the time it was published. The best part of this book, to me, was the Afterword, analyzing the various critiques the Author had received of her work.

[Ariel · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hana's book is a slightly different take on the nontraditional bride book ... she recognizes the weirdness and folly of the Wedding Industrial Complex, but instead of fighting it she finds herself getting oddly caught up in the whole process. It's a light, fun wedding memoir with a bit of "where did these traditions come from?" research to back it up.

[Sarah · Rating 2 out of 5]

Eh...it was ok. The author talks alot about the overbearing wedding industry - which I can relate to - but not enough about the "characters" in her own story i.e. her family, friends and fiance. With a little more detail on these, I would have cared more about her AND about the book itself.

[Michelle · Rating 3 out of 5]

Fun, easy ready. About how this laid back author does almost everything she says she won't do when planning her wedding. You really get a feel for her family and friends. She's a good writer. Good read for those planning their own ceremony soon.

[Lianne · Rating 4 out of 5]

a hilarious look at how a non conformist bride survived her conformist divorced mother and playboy-esque father trying to help her plan her wedding. All while trying to keep everyone but herself (the bride) happy.

[Rachel · Rating 5 out of 5]

This is a great book for those who are planning a wedding. It is a funny look at the wedding industry in general and one woman's story about how you will get through the planning. It teaches you to laugh at all the bumps on the way.

[Natalie · Rating 4 out of 5]

I would give this book three stars, but give an extra star because it provides a reminder to someone planning a wedding not to go overboard! I also gave it to my mom to read so we don't get too brainwashed by the wedding industry in our planning.

[Leslie Jem · Rating 3 out of 5]

The author was a little too princess-y for me to want her as my friend, but this was an great indictment of the wedding industry.

[mrsboomreads · Rating 4 out of 5]

Memoir of wedding planning madness. Since I'm in the thick of it, it resonated. I loved the authors writing style - a mix of witty, stram of cosciousness and research.

[Rachel · Rating 4 out of 5]

Hilarious!

[Jaime · Rating 4 out of 5]

Great book to read if you are getting married...very funny and relatable!