Myths about Suicide

by Thomas E. Joiner

Around the world, more than a million people die by suicide each year. Yet many of us know very little about a tragedy that may strike our own loved ones―and much of what we think we know is wrong. This clear and powerful book dismantles myth after myth to bring compassionate and accurate understanding of a massive international killer.

Drawing on a fascinating array of clinical cases, media reports, literary works, and scientific studies, Thomas Joiner demolishes both moralistic and psychotherapeutic clichés. He shows that suicide is not easy, cowardly, vengeful, or selfish. It is not a manifestation of "suppressed rage" or a side effect of medication. Threats of suicide, far from being idle, are often followed by serious attempts. People who are prevented once from killing themselves will not necessarily try again.

The risk for suicide, Joiner argues, is partly genetic and is influenced by often agonizing mental disorders. Vulnerability to suicide may be anticipated and treated. Most important, suicide can be prevented.

An eminent expert whose own father's death by suicide changed his life, Joiner is relentless in his pursuit of the truth about suicide and deeply sympathetic to such tragic waste of life and the pain it causes those left behind.

Genres: Psychology, Nonfiction, Science, Mental Health, Psychiatry, Health, Counselling

304 pages, Paperback

First published January 1, 2010

About the author

Joiner, Thomas.
Joiner, Thomas E.
Joiner, Thomas E. Jr

Thomas Joiner is an American academic psychologist and leading expert on suicide. He is the Robert O. Lawton Professor of Psychology at Florida State University, where he operates his Laboratory for the Study of the Psychology and Neurobiology of Mood Disorders, Suicide, and Related Conditions. Joiner holds a Ph.D. from the University of Texas at Austin.

Reviews

[Rachael · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is more accessible than Joiner's first (Why People Die by Suicide), but as it is based on his theory about suicide set forth in the previous, I'm glad I read them in order. Here Joiner is looking specifically at common ideas (often wrong, thus "myths") people have about suicide that impede understanding, treatment, and even compassion. He covers things as varied as the effects of genes, suicide notes, and whether antidepressants contribute to suicide. Throughout, Joiner uses data to reinforce his theory that suicide is related to three specific traits: belongingness, burdensomeness, and tolerance to pain/self injury. I feel as though these two books have contributed to a significant shift in my own outlook, as I have been holding on to a series of beliefs that were both painful and erroneous: that suicide is selfish, that suicide is spurious or done on a whim, that a suicide does not care for those he leaves behind. But Joiner argues that none of these are really true, especially if one considers the sheer misery that causes suicide. Those who die by suicide consider themselves to be burdens, they often feel others' lives will improve when they are gone. Anyway, I feel Joiner has helped me reach a sense of understanding that I was incapable of feeling before. Except now I notice problematic depictions of suicide all over the place that only seem to reinforce these myths and misunderstandings, to the detriment of all.

[Meaghan · Rating 4 out of 5]

The book was pretty repetitive (kept bringing up the same examples over and over again) and I wish it had a better table of contents. But Joiner definitely knows his stuff and he writes in a very engaging way, with appropriate intensity and details. I think I agree with everything he said about the various myths. I would recommend this to suicidal people, their families and friends, and anyone who's just interested in the subject. If I commit suicide, I might will my diaries to Dr. Joiner for his research.

[Suzanne Lyndon]

As a lifelong victim of depression, I understand how difficult it is to dispel misconceptions believed by most regarding mental illness and suicide. Thomas Joiner's book is an excellent source for those wishing to understand and help dispel the myths of suicide. His writing style using stories of actual suicide victims and explanations of often complicated research is masterful.

[Sean Hagey · Rating 4 out of 5]

The author does a good job of handling the most common myths and misperceptions around such an important but taboo topic. He also does a pretty good job of presenting the best available evidence in a readable format that is intended for the public.

Trigger warning: the book often talks about suicide methods and includes details that would likely cause problems for some readers.

Overall, I recommend this book for people who are passionate about the topics of mental health advocacy and suicide prevention. We desperately need more people addressing these critical issues.

[Kate · Rating 4 out of 5]

Pretty compelling analysis. A few things I couldn't wrap my head around, and the glaring error that people commit suicide off the Golden Gate Bridge instead of the Bay Bridge because GGB is prettier (it is, but BB is also restricted to pedestrians).

Really helpful for someone trying to comprehend suicide, and an interesting look at the things we take for granted about suicide and why those may be problematic.

[Amy · Rating 4 out of 5]

fascinating book about a subject that no one wants to discuss yet it should be discussed. very thorough research.

[Melody Holloway · Rating 4 out of 5]

The book definitely speaks to what many of us have experienced when seeking treatments for suicidal ideation/attempts. Many medical professionals/mental health clinicians feed into the miss. Some psychiatric facilities will have you go through a list and check the boxes for each reason why you want to die by suicide. some of them include revenge, self mastery, to seek attention, copycatting, etc. None of these applied to so many I personally know. Given what he did to try to help others after the tragedies of what happened to his father and grandfather, I commend this type of research. I have found many YouTube videos and Ted talks presentations that he gives publicly on different aspects of suicide and of loved ones who are survivors. The only problem I personally have with this book is primary focus notably toward mental disorders; medicalization of long-term effects of “Inspired By True Events” abuse, horror, neglect, dismissal, divide, bias, physical, emotional, and financial strain, and serious chronic true medical conditions. We become altered due to survival adaptations, instincts, and coping strategies developed by the human brain when experiencing what we were never built to endure. Also, no attention is given to those of us to wish to reunite with loved ones / friends who have passed. After reading books regarding trauma and neurological conditions, we simply do not need that entire section of the diagnostic and statistical manual of mental disorders. This does not help us. Alienation, loneliness / isolation, innate necessity for connection, burdensomeness, lack of communal understanding, not feeling as if we fit in or belong. These are definitely top reasons. And as a common reason among everyone, we feel as if we are in the way or “take up too much space “as I have maintained since before awareness of this book. I personally support Dr. Thomas Joyner and other leading researchers who tried to direct the stigma and blame away from people who already carry the weight of too much of those, forcing us right to the edge. Self preservation, desire for life, and the natural fear of death seem to be the only things that will stop someone. You have to carry decades of being seen as selfish, manipulative, faking, lying, or trying to get attention, only drive someone more toward it when they would do anything to keep attention off of them keep people away from them when they do not feel, they deserve kindness. all we need is someone to care equally as important to be able to care to love to support to check in and to be able to reciprocate and pay forward kindness.

[Kristyn Demers · Rating 3 out of 5]

Thoughtful discussion about suicide, however, it was a bit repetitive and drawn out. I do, however, appreciate the new light and the correction of the myths and misunderstandings Joiner provides in this book.

[Elena]

Pentru a înțelege teoria lui Joiner, nu trebuie ignorat faptul că cei trei factori care declanșează dorința de auto-distrugere nu au apărut din senin. Deși afectează individual, fără discriminare, sunt o consecință a ceea ce tindem să nu numim progres, a deposedării individului de auto-control, a presiunii de a se potrivi unor șabloane și poate în special a comunicării deficitare. Să nu uităm nici de componenta evoluționară: oamenii nu sunt singurele animale care comit suicid. Furnicile de foc, leii sau maimuțele Rhesus demonstrază că instinctul de conservare a speciei e uneori mai puternic decât acela de auto-conservare a individului. Un fel de a spune că cei care nu se adaptează, se distrug. Un instinct ce practic stă scris în gene. Sau, mai exact spus, nivelul redus al 5-HIIA (acidul hidroxi-indolacetic) în lichidul spineal caracterizează oamenii ce tind spre un comportament suicidar. Astfel că, pentru unii, moartea nu mai e un străin, ci omul din oglindă.

[Gabriel Alejandro Federo · Rating 5 out of 5]

Excellent book.

As a person that has seen the process through which someone becomes suicidal, with friends, distant families, and family of some friends, I would say that almost all that doctor Joiners stated in this book (and his theory) is true.


Please note:
- If you are interested in reading this book, and want to know where his analysis comes from, and its why, it will be of help to read his theory of suicide, which you could find on the PubMed website.

Interpersonal Theory of Suicide reference:
Van Orden KA, Witte TK, Cukrowicz KC, Braithwaite SR, Selby EA, Joiner TE Jr. The interpersonal theory of suicide. Psychol Rev. 2010;117(2):575-600. doi:10.1037/a0018697

PubMed (NIH-National Library of Medicine-National Center for Biotechnology Information) website:
https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/

[Julie Hersh · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is a great read if you want to explore some of the consistent myths about suicide. I read Why People Die by Suicide - which has been a bit hit among psychologists and mental health professionals. The information in Why People Die by Suicide is excellent, but Myths About Suicide is a far easier read.Both books are incredibly well researched - not just in the lab. Joiner crosses art, literature and other avenues when making his observations. Brilliant guy. Nice too. Met him at a conference this summer when he spoke at San Marcos. Kind, smart and really trying to make a difference.

[Fishface · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was good -- well-thought-out and research-based. There were a few logical gaps in there that I hope were explained in some of his other work on suicide.

[Maryam · Rating 3 out of 5]

The whole psychological analysis of suicide presented by Joiner seems informative to some extent. Also, the explanation of the myths that are attached to suicidal behaviours provides a broad glance to the connection between the act of suicide and social expectations. Moreover, Joiner had highlighted many factors contributing to suicidal tendencies including mental, seasonal, and genetic elements.
Well, I don't find these points enough to investigate through the nature of suicide.
Yeah. I understand that the book is meant to be focusing on one side related to negating social codes and standards placed upon suicide, but I find this discussion as an inadequate representation of suicide. Thus, besides reading more about the whole subject, one should also explore the physical, inner, and abstract forces behind the process of suicide.
I personally don't view suicidal behaviours as a mental disorder. There are limitless possibilities accompanying the decision of suicide. It is a decision after all, an attempt to decide upon oneself's destiny (though illusionary) since we've been placed into this void of absurdity involuntarily.
What interests me is not the act of suicide itself but rather the dilemma underlying this attempt.
Throughout his book The Troubles With Being Born, Cioran says “Kill yourself because of what you are, yes, but not because all humanity would spit in your face!”
Okay, so why do we tend to think of suicide just in relation to other people? Yeah. We live in a community and shit. Humans are social animals. We know that too! The whole idea of humanity is interconnected with the surrounded entities and we are chained by this cycle. Yeah, sounds familiar! Taking these remarks in consideration, social elements are usually presented vividly having the most profound influence on the decision of suicide, On our understanding of suicide, and the psychological approaches towards suicide. Still, killing oneself isn't only intertwined with the idea of " what is the worth of my existence? my death would be more valuable than my existence (to others.)" which has been discussed throughout Joiner's book. It's not only about the perception of oneself in relation to social judgments and viewpoints. It actually transcends this one-sided outlook. It's not a relationship between individuals and society, it is more of a correlation between individuals and themselves. I have so many reflections on this topic but I'll keep them for later occasions.

PS. The suicide spots listed below aren't mentioned throughout the book, except for the Golden Gate Bridge. Regardless, I'm keeping these landmarks as a reminder of the places that one should consider visiting in order to draw a long-lasting inspiration when one is hesitant to decide upon her/his remaining time as a breathing machine :

>The Gap/ New South Wales
>West Gate Bridge

Australia


>Wuhan Bridge
>Nanjing Bridge

China


>Nusle Bridge

Czech Republic



>Acropolis of Athens
>The Corinth Canal

Greece


>Al-sink Bridge
>14 Ramadan Bridge
>14 July Bridge
> Bab Al-mouatham Bridge
> Al-hounood Bridge

Iraq



>Cliffs of Mother
>Foyle Bridge

Ireland


>Aokigahara Forest – Mount Fuji
>Hie Shrine
>Keogn Falls
>Shin-Koiwa Station
>Mount Mihara
>Tojinbo

Japan



>Pigeons’ Rock

Lebanon


>Beachy Head
>London Underground
>Humber Bridge

London


>Han River

South Korea



>Aurora Bridge
>Golden Gate Bridge
>Niagara Falls
>San Diego-Coronado Bridge
>Sunshine Skyway Bridge


USA

[David · Rating 5 out of 5]

BEST BOOK!!
SUICIDE MIND
i) suicide based on major 3 factors:
a) learned fearlessness through planning and thinking....continue calm learning, repeat practce
b) perceived burdensomeness: self thinking self are giving trouble to the others
c) failed belongings...sense of alienation
ii) suicide are not all alcoholics, and not all alcoholics are suicidal
iii) suicidal planning more than impulsive acts and planning+impulse have more urge than just planning.
iv) triggering factors that trigger iii) alcohol, drugs
v) basis for suicide: depression
vi) depression+trigger factors+planning+impulse=suicide ACTS
vii) suicide to to achieve self control, not the other way around
viii) David Foster Wallace with basis of depression and vi) achieved
ix) suicidal bombers with 4th elements: cultivation (training/brainwashing)

SUICIDE BEHAVIOR
i) Pre-Suicide ACT: No note, no notification, no hint because vi) (with impulse)
ii) Pre-Suicide ACT: calm, non-noticeable, normal
iii) Pre-Suicide ACT: slight hint OR HINTS of COMMUNICATIONS
iv) Pre-Suicide ACT: self note (yes), instructional notes, and pre-planning for OTHERS, such as laundry, kids to school, normal chorus, will, wealth inheritance, etc
v) Pre-Suicide ACT: self note tend to be normal because too many negative thought obstruct normal thoughts....normal thoughts<>negative thoughts
vi) ACT itself: often regretful when the ACT is happening....but too late.
vii) Self inflicted injury is not suicide, but it indicates a TENDENCY towards suicide
viii) Anorexic: slow torture, slow suicide. The most brutal form of psychiatric slow suicide.
ix) bipolar personality (duality)>>form of depression>>basis for suicide tendency
x) Hollywood stars>>not suicidal. But simply not risky acts and drugs>>death

I am ignoring the teenager's suicide portion since non-related to me

[Allen O'Brien · Rating 4 out of 5]

I finished this book with a more defined sense of understanding and compassion and far less stigma around the topic of suicide. I can see clearer in this moment that the twin beliefs of a person’s high sense of burdensomeness and low sense of belonging (causal factors which form the author’s thesis) come from irrational places.

The author didn’t argue the following but I guess this is what I’ve taken with me: even if these feelings about alienation and burdensomeness are true for a person (anyone can empathize with them on some level), these beliefs originate in irrationality — either they are less true than a person perceives or they are in a sense “more real” but have still begun with mental health disorders (and so triggered by trauma and/or exacerbated by a world we have not built for one another). In any case, deaths by suicide are our collective health issue and one crisis we can destigmatize, understand better, and treat like we would any other.

As for the book, it is sometimes colloquial and just a touch repetitive, but the overall effect was a feeling of frankness and congeniality with an expert in the field that I enjoyed.

[Kasi Beorchia · Rating 4 out of 5]

This is another englightening book from Thomas Joiner about suicide. I was reminded reading this book that "fear is not all there is to stigma. Stigma combines fear with disgust, contempt, and lack of compassion, all of which flow from ignorance." There is stigma around suicide that I think at times prevents us from openly learning and talking about it. (I found myself even feeling uneasy at times as I have studied the topic--needing to give myself a quick gut-check and examination of my own biases.) However, I know that because of the information in this book (and in "Why People Die By Suicide"), there is so much opportunity for growth in understanding and empathy. I am grateful to have a better understanding about suicide and how I can support others around me.

[Fidan · Rating 4 out of 5]

Very stigmatized topic but I am glad this is discussed by an author who has special understanding and extensive knowledge. I think it is a hugely impactful book and should be read to gain awareness and compassion for those affected. Myths or false assumptions are unfortunately widely common so I am glad there is a book out there for people to get educated, even though it might be something that is not related to them. Don’t recommend reading at night because there are some gruesome examples provided and trying to fall asleep when the last image in your mind is of a man decapitating himself is not pleasant.

[Victoria Myers · Rating 4 out of 5]

Thomas Joiner is a psychologist known for his research on suicide. While this book is more clinical and academic, it did provide solid information which helped me better understand some of the common misconceptions surrounding suicide. It brought clarity and gave me peace by dismantling dangerous misunderstandings and stigma so often attached to this topic. He helps lay readers grasp the understanding of deep psychological and emotional struggles that often drive suicide. These insights answered questions I was struggling with. A bit of a harder read but good information.

[Robert Bogue]

I was surprised when Alex took his life. I thought we knew about what the warning signs were for suicide, but clearly, we're wrong. Myths about Suicide explores some of the common myths about suicide – including myths that we still teach people who are supposed to identify risk for suicide in the people they work with.

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[Sarah · Rating 4 out of 5]

Please read this book. It’s so incredibly educating. The data and facts are something that cannot be argued. Suicide is so misunderstood and portrayed so poorly in media. As someone that struggles with depression and suicidal ideation, this book helps. All the times I’ve dealt with anger and alienation from people I care about because they believed that I was incredibly selfish. It’s so much more. This book could open compassion in you that you didn’t know was missing.

[Wendelle · Rating 5 out of 5]

the top authority on the psychology of suicide. the author provides rebuttals against popular misconceptions of suicide, as perpetuated by other books. he determines that the two single motivators for suicide are perceived burdensomeness and alienation. Despite his position as an aacademic he writes with compassion, not clinical disinterest.

[Justine · Rating 5 out of 5]

Joiner has a very old school writing style, but the book is still extremely informative and is a great tool to help dispel common myths about suicide with actual cases and data. I highly recommend this book to people who engage with suicidal people regularly, be they loved ones or clients from a mental health standpoint.

[Madisen Smith · Rating 5 out of 5]

A MUST READ. Educate yourself.

Although very emotionally charged, I think this is an important evidence-based myth-buster that can be used to open-up the conversation about suicide and break the stigmas that still hurt many people in our communities.

[Theremin Poisoning · Rating 3 out of 5]

Thoughtful, with interesting data.

[Caysa · Rating 5 out of 5]

Incredibly informative and tactfully written.

[Mya · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.5-3 stars
While having a noble cause (trying to lift the stigma and disgust people feel towards those who commit suicide) I feel that the book isn't that well referenced, sourced and unbiased. A lot of things could have been written further about because this way it seemed like there were conflicting messages in the book. For example, suicide is never done on a whim, but if you have a history of suicidal thought things can trigger you and suddenly push you over the edge. That, to me, sounds a lot like "on a whim" or shall I say, without lots of thought/planning. This book makes me scared that anyone who has a history of suicidal thought should be monitored all the time because they are at risk constantly. This is just an example of messages that seem conflicting. I'm sure they make sense to the author since he works with suicidal people, I just think he should have explained things better.

[Massimo · Rating 5 out of 5]

When I started reading this book, I didn't know if I made a good choice... It was a god choice.
Starting from his personal experience, which is not intrusive in any case, the author analyzes dozen of suicide with the help of the latest scientific literature and many examples from the clinic or from the news.
Myth after myth, the author helps us to free ourselves from certain clichés, and offers interesting points for reflection for those interested in the issue.
Reading fluent and easy, to buy.

[Troy · Rating 5 out of 5]

There are three factors that add up to supplying the frame of mind necessary to commit suicide:
-A feeling that they are a pain or a bother to someone else, or a group
-A feeling that people, or specific people, would be better off without them.
-A mental numbness to physical pain and blood.

Packed with anecdotes and references which back up the author's many assertions, I thought this book did a great job in debunking a ton of myths about what suicide is and why people do it.

[Meg - A Bookish Affair · Rating 4 out of 5]

In this book, Joiner tackles several common myths associated with suicide. Some of the book was a little hard to digest for obvious reasons. Some of the myths that Joiner addresses are that prevention is not possible, the affect of drugs and alcohol, the idea that suicide is easy, and the idea that suicide is a random occurrence. Very interesting book!

[Anthea · Rating 3 out of 5]

Easy to read and I felt that the author had quite a deep understanding suicide and has a really sensitive and realistic approach towards the topic. It felt kind of repetitive at times as he kept drawing out the same examples. Overall, this book was an informative read, gives a detailed insight into the minds of the suicidal and the reasons/causes/myths behind it.