The Bible: The Complete Word of God

by Adam Long

Genres: Humor

Audio CD

First published February 1, 2003

About the author

Adam Long is an American actor, screenwriter, writer, and director based in London, England, as well as a founding member of The Reduced Shakespeare Company. From 1987 to 2003 he co-wrote and performed "The Complete Works of William Shakespeare (abridged)", "The Complete History of America (abridged)", "The Reduced Shakespeare Radio Show" for the BBC World Service, and "The Ring Reduced", a 30 minute condensation of Wagner's Ring Cycle for Channel 4 television.
In 1996, Long directed the Reduced Shakespeare Company's London production of "The Complete Works of William Shakespeare (Abridged)" which was nominated for an Olivier Award for Best Comedy in 1997, and ran for 9 years at the Criterion Theatre in Piccadilly Circus. Stage production licensing in the U S and Canada is by Broadway Play Publishing Inc.
Long left The Reduced Shakespeare Company in 2003. He then co-wrote and starred in The Barn, an independent feature film which won a British Independent Film Award in 2004 - The Raindance Award, for the film which best embodies the spirit of independent filmmaking. In 2006, he wrote and performed Star Wars Shortened for Sky Movies, and The Condensed History of Tony Blair for BBC Radio 4. In 2007 he wrote and directed Dickens Unplugged, which premiered at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. The show was brought to Guildford in February, 2007, and made its West End debut on May 23, 2008 at the Comedy Theatre. It has been published as Dickens (abridged) by Broadway Play Publishing Inc. In 2008, he wrote and performed The Condensed History of Political Parties for BBC Radio 4, and in 2009 The Condensed History of George W Bush, also for BBC Radio 4.
From 2008 to the present, Adam has worked extensively in animation, writing for Netflix, CBBC, CBeebies, Disney, Nickelodeon, and Sprout. He is the voice of Mr. Small in seasons 2 to 6 of the BAFTA and Emmy Award-winning animated series The Amazing World of Gumball. He has also provided voices for Elliott from Earth.
Adam Long currently resides in London.

Reviews

[Bruce · Rating 3 out of 5]

"Man, oh Manischewitz, Samson is stomping the stuffing out of this guy.... And now he picks him up... and he's biting his ear!!! That's going to cost him in the penalty phase -- whoahhh!" (p. 32)

Apparently, there was lots of professional wrestling in Biblical times. Who knew? If you've never seen the Reduced Shakespeare Company, you really owe it to yourself to get out to one of their performances at the first available opportunity. They're kind of like the Flying Karamazov brothers only with less props. If they don't make stops to any theaters near you, see if you can get a hand on any of their relatively recently published playscripts (or better still, their radio program as a book-on-CD).

Their condensed take on the Bible is actually pretty tame, which is why I only give it 3 stars. In a bid to be inoffensive, they miss out on a chance for some super-big laughs (the last 20 minutes of the scripted show is one big "Old MacDonald" audience-participation sing-along, with folks conscripted from the house to assist with six count-em six E-I-E-I-O choruses. (If you wonder whether this is challenging to sustain, even with mildly amusing variations, try singing just three choruses aloud by yourself without suddenly accelerating, mumbling, or otherwise finessing. When you've finished, remember that RSC will still have 3 to do.)

But let me not be unfairly critical. I mean, c'mon, everybody, what's the difference between ignorance and apathy?

Say it with me now:

"I don't know and I don't care."

Even if this joke is as old as the Bible, there's no knocking the classics.