A Married Man's Guide to Christmas

by Robert Henry

In the great tradition of guy-humor everywhere, here comes humorist Robert Henry’s growling, good-hearted rant about holiday madness, A MARRIED MAN’S GUIDE TO CHRISTMAS. Henry reveals the truth about Christmas through the eyes of a typical married man. “Remember, it’s not how you celebrate the joyous season. It’s whether you are still alive, married, sleeping indoors, with a healthy prostate, and without a rap sheet on January 4th that counts.” Husbands will laugh out loud. Dads will slap their knees and keel over (have CPR ready). Wives, daughters, sisters, mothers, aunts, female co-workers and sales clerks who dread seeing men mumble and mutter their way through the Christmas section at BIG BOX DISCOUNT WAREHOUSE will nod in recognition at the syndrome best described as “CAN I SURVIVE UNTIL NEW YEAR’S?” A Married Man’s Guide To Christmas is a must for every guy who wants the women in his life to understand why he’d rather buy them gift certificates than brave the treacherous online world of lingerie catalogs. Why have just a joyous season, when you can have a Christmas filled with laughs that don’t include finding pictures of Uncle Herbert in a teddy? Irreverent, honest, and biodegradable, Robert Henry has captured the essence of the holiday season for all men in A Married Man’s Guide To Christmas. So grab it today for all the beleaguered males on your Xmas list and all the long-suffering females who just want the lights strung on the front porch by Christmas Eve, the honey-do list completed before Aunt Sookie arrives with her flatulent Pekinese, and that expensive bottle of Scotch left mostly full until the tinsel is hung, the presents are wrapped, and the home owner’s association has accepted your apology for spelling out a less-than-jolly greeting in solar-powered candy canes on your front lawn.

Genres: Humor, Christmas, Ebooks, Fiction, Holiday

84 pages, Kindle Edition

First published October 6, 2008

Reviews

[Cyndi · Rating 5 out of 5]

A cute book of essays about the madness of Christmas. Hilarious! 🤣 shopping, hanging lights, family visits, traffic, etc. The author finds the humor in all of it. Fun book that breaks the tension of the holidays. 😊

[Myk · Rating 2 out of 5]

This story read like it was written in the '50s and just updated to the current era. I could not relate with the author's point of views. It separated things into men's ideals and what the mysterious woman wants at christmas time. To me it was very outdated.

[Beth · Rating 1 out of 5]

I laughed once or twice. It was a freebie on Kindle and didn't do much for me.

[Michele · Rating 3 out of 5]

This was one of those books you can pick up, put down and pick up again. I started it in December, and due to having other books that I borrowed and needed to get returned, I picked this up numerous times. I chuckled my way through this book, amused at this man's perspective on Christmas..the whole frenzy of the holiday.

[Sheila · Rating 4 out of 5]

This was a freebie on Amazon for Kindle. It made me giggle a lot. And caused an odd craving for eggnog (a beverage I normally don't care for). If you like a little bit of light heartedness about the holidays, give it go.

[Elaine · Rating 2 out of 5]

A humorous look at holiday overeating and boozing, what to purchase the wife for Christmas, the dangers of decorating, etc. It was okay.

[Hillary · Rating 3 out of 5]

2.75 star.

[Maryalice Ritti · Rating 3 out of 5]

Humorous and silly. Perfect time of year to read this. Downloaded it on my kindle fire. Short little satire on the Christmas season.