What do you think?
Rate this book


168 pages, Paperback
First published January 1, 1722
In this windbreaking bark of fart, thunder-rated, fume-inist firebrand and tremor-nent puff-essor of Bumbast, Fart-inhando Puff-indorst, is rattler squeaker fizz powers. In The benefit of farting explain'd, he poots pen to page to toot the horn of the rump trumpet, sulfur the Quaker queef air seggs. If it cheeser, flatus stank the leaven-scent Lady Damp-Fart of Her-Fart-Shire for letting rip the burst English rend-ering of Puff-indorst's bull-snort-al yodel the butt burp. Few men of let-'er's have quacked applause whiff odor quiet gas ripass-ionate. Bean a cut above the rectum, this bazooka is turtle blowout in the anals of hiss-tory. It is a blast to read, blat that:
On Mifs V——e's F——T, in the PHILIPPCK STILE
Lovely Babe of Maid of Honour,
Every Grace fhall fmile upon her,
Sweeteft Warbler of the Tail,
Soft as Breeze of Southern Gale;
Or the fanning Zephyrs Blaft,
Over Beds of Spices paft;
Gentle Puff of fragrant Air,
Squeez’d from Breech of Virgin Fair:
’Tis by Thee the Fair difcover,
Proof of Vigour in a Lover;
Silent Fizzle, or fpeaking Fart,
Eafily both Eafe impart;
Sweet Fore-boder, joyful Sound,
To the Belly that’s hard bound;
Cure of Cholick, Cure of Gripes,
Tuneful Drone of lower Pipes.
Thus the Winds in Cavern pent,
Widen Holes, and force a Vent;
Stealing Whifper, ‘fcape of Bum,
Soft as Flute, or loud as Drum;
Downwards breathing, backwards figh,
Happy Smock that lies fo nigh;
Happy fhe that can this Way,
Shut her Mouth, but loudly Bray.
I stink spitters safety bray that this heinie tract hisser blast blurt honk hiccup-ject. Three Bronx cheers for this uproarious screech. It is shart to make you smell. Rip rip, hooray! Wazoo! Whoopee! Readers, I colon you to join farts-es. Together, we can Free the Fizzle once and cornhole!