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Your Life Can Be Better, Using Strategies for Adult ADD/ADHD
This book is about using strategies for adult ADD or ADHD to make your life better. It has more information, too, especially about studying and learning, but it's really about strategies.
It is personal; it tells of how I and my patients and my friends cope, and sometimes fail to cope, with our ADD ADHD.
So it is not particularly scientific, and doesn't go much into the basics, like the history of ADD or how it's diagnosed, or causes, or treatment, though it does have some of that.
But what I'm trying to say is, it is about strategies, what you can do to make your life better.
It is personal; it tells of how I and my patients and my friends cope, and sometimes fail to cope, with our ADD ADHD.
So it is not particularly scientific, and doesn't go much into the basics, like the history of ADD or how it's diagnosed, or causes, or treatment, though it does have some of that.
But what I'm trying to say is, it is about strategies, what you can do to make your life better.
452 pages, Paperback
First published December 12, 2011
497 people are currently reading
1132 people want to read
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Displaying 1 - 30 of 33 reviews
October 10, 2014
This book is depressing.
The reason for depression is that the author, now 74 year old, still lives and struggles with adult ADD. He have found no cure, no final solution, no "aha!" moment. He discovered that he had ADD at the age of 64. I can't even imagine the amounts of self-doubt and criticism he took for all these years. He refuses to take medication for his condition, "for no rational reason", as he writes. I think this is related to his faith. And he focuses only on negative aspects of having ADD, and how to cope with them. This book says almost nothing on positive sides of this condition, which are many.
However, the good news is that this book is motherlode of strategies of dealing with ADD symptoms (he had to invent and discover them, and he had plenty of time to do that). Almost anyone with this condition can profit, taking one or two or five ideas for this book and adapting it for his or her life. And the life will be better, as promised in the title.
But don't read this book as the first book on ADD, especially if you already have depression. "Delivered from Distraction" is much more positive.
The reason for depression is that the author, now 74 year old, still lives and struggles with adult ADD. He have found no cure, no final solution, no "aha!" moment. He discovered that he had ADD at the age of 64. I can't even imagine the amounts of self-doubt and criticism he took for all these years. He refuses to take medication for his condition, "for no rational reason", as he writes. I think this is related to his faith. And he focuses only on negative aspects of having ADD, and how to cope with them. This book says almost nothing on positive sides of this condition, which are many.
However, the good news is that this book is motherlode of strategies of dealing with ADD symptoms (he had to invent and discover them, and he had plenty of time to do that). Almost anyone with this condition can profit, taking one or two or five ideas for this book and adapting it for his or her life. And the life will be better, as promised in the title.
But don't read this book as the first book on ADD, especially if you already have depression. "Delivered from Distraction" is much more positive.
June 29, 2013
I'm so glad that this was the first book I read on ADD/ADHD. Immediately, I related to about 3/4 of the what the author (who is a psychiatrist with ADD) struggles with.
For a few years, I've suspected that I might have ADD. After some dark moments in life, I picked up a few books on ADD to see if I was a likely candidate. A few chapters into this one convinced me, and two months of professional testing (including that awful computer test) confirmed it.
What sets this book apart - even from other books written by psychiatrists with ADD - is that it's a very personal book. The author has not "figured it all out in 8 simple steps" or anything like that. But he's figured a LOT of it out, and I've already built in routines (that are becoming habits) to help alleviate my own ADD symptoms. One of the suggestions I took was to finish one thing before starting something new - so I finish this book before getting too far into the others. That way, I don't end up with 4 partially read books by the time I loose interest.
While reading the book, you'll learn just how difficult it was for the author to stick with it and finish this book. Not only do you feel that he genuinely cares about people with ADD, but you see it - like with the severely reduced cost of the Kindle version of the book.
The methods he introduces help with nearly the entire range of ADD symptoms, including related symptoms like sleep problems, forgetfulness, procrastination, etc. He also introduces several clients who are "classic cases" in various types of ADD. One in particular, I related to so well that it was actually pretty emotional reading about him.
One of the biggest things I like about this book is that the chapters are short (there's over 70 of them, separated into units). So you can sit down for two minutes, read a full chapter, and feel like you accomplished something.
Some things are reiterated several times throughout the book, and while it might across as an imperfection to some people, I think it's pretty good for ADD-types like me who forgets nearly everything I've read the moment I set a book down.
This book has a realistic, organic feel to it. I felt like the author was conversing with me and relating to me as a gentle mentor would. It was nice not having to endure a sales pitch being crammed down my throat If you want a perfectly structured book full of pie-in-the-sky, fizzled-out fad-techniques, then go elsewhere. These are tried-and-true methods, many of which the author employs for his own ADD. The methods I've already built into my life are helping immensely, and there are more that I'm currently working on.
I highly recommend this book.
Highly recommended
For a few years, I've suspected that I might have ADD. After some dark moments in life, I picked up a few books on ADD to see if I was a likely candidate. A few chapters into this one convinced me, and two months of professional testing (including that awful computer test) confirmed it.
What sets this book apart - even from other books written by psychiatrists with ADD - is that it's a very personal book. The author has not "figured it all out in 8 simple steps" or anything like that. But he's figured a LOT of it out, and I've already built in routines (that are becoming habits) to help alleviate my own ADD symptoms. One of the suggestions I took was to finish one thing before starting something new - so I finish this book before getting too far into the others. That way, I don't end up with 4 partially read books by the time I loose interest.
While reading the book, you'll learn just how difficult it was for the author to stick with it and finish this book. Not only do you feel that he genuinely cares about people with ADD, but you see it - like with the severely reduced cost of the Kindle version of the book.
The methods he introduces help with nearly the entire range of ADD symptoms, including related symptoms like sleep problems, forgetfulness, procrastination, etc. He also introduces several clients who are "classic cases" in various types of ADD. One in particular, I related to so well that it was actually pretty emotional reading about him.
One of the biggest things I like about this book is that the chapters are short (there's over 70 of them, separated into units). So you can sit down for two minutes, read a full chapter, and feel like you accomplished something.
Some things are reiterated several times throughout the book, and while it might across as an imperfection to some people, I think it's pretty good for ADD-types like me who forgets nearly everything I've read the moment I set a book down.
This book has a realistic, organic feel to it. I felt like the author was conversing with me and relating to me as a gentle mentor would. It was nice not having to endure a sales pitch being crammed down my throat If you want a perfectly structured book full of pie-in-the-sky, fizzled-out fad-techniques, then go elsewhere. These are tried-and-true methods, many of which the author employs for his own ADD. The methods I've already built into my life are helping immensely, and there are more that I'm currently working on.
I highly recommend this book.
Highly recommended
May 29, 2014
Having been recently diagnosed, this is the first book I've read on the subject. It felt good to see that I was not the only one having to deal with some annoying "habits".
The style made me laugh a lot!
The structure is clear and not overwhelming, making it easy to read.
I would recommend this book to anybody looking for more than scientific aspects of ADHD.
The style made me laugh a lot!
The structure is clear and not overwhelming, making it easy to read.
I would recommend this book to anybody looking for more than scientific aspects of ADHD.
June 2, 2022
This was the first book that I've read on ADHD, so I'm sure that I still gleaned some value from it, but the aspects that I disliked were:
*There were typos and the content was disorganized. For example, in a part of the book, he admitted that while writing the book he had gotten sections jumbled up and duplicated, and he had to go back and reorganize it, which he hated having to do. So it seems like he just didn't finish that task appropriately, and instead left his disjointed stream of consciousness for us to read.
*He doesn't have a very rigorous schedule. Even when he was working full time he said he took appointments on Tuesday and Thursday only. So it was easy for me as a full-time working parent with young children to roll my eyes at his supposed great tips about time management when he had all of these optional tasks in his day, i.e., examples about how to pack for his fishing trips or how to stay on task for his optional guitar lessons.
*His wife seems to have basically carried him through his life with mananging the majority of the childrearing and household management and all sorts of invisible labor. He tries to give credit to his wife, but he has written it as if he's talking to one of his other retired male patients, like just delegate this to your significant other, and try not to be upset about the nagging.
Bottom line, I'm also getting content from other women with ADHD on instagram who are parents, psychiatrists, coaches, etc. and their content and their advice is so much more relevant to me.
*There were typos and the content was disorganized. For example, in a part of the book, he admitted that while writing the book he had gotten sections jumbled up and duplicated, and he had to go back and reorganize it, which he hated having to do. So it seems like he just didn't finish that task appropriately, and instead left his disjointed stream of consciousness for us to read.
*He doesn't have a very rigorous schedule. Even when he was working full time he said he took appointments on Tuesday and Thursday only. So it was easy for me as a full-time working parent with young children to roll my eyes at his supposed great tips about time management when he had all of these optional tasks in his day, i.e., examples about how to pack for his fishing trips or how to stay on task for his optional guitar lessons.
*His wife seems to have basically carried him through his life with mananging the majority of the childrearing and household management and all sorts of invisible labor. He tries to give credit to his wife, but he has written it as if he's talking to one of his other retired male patients, like just delegate this to your significant other, and try not to be upset about the nagging.
Bottom line, I'm also getting content from other women with ADHD on instagram who are parents, psychiatrists, coaches, etc. and their content and their advice is so much more relevant to me.
November 28, 2016
This is an outstanding book on strategies to help an adult with Attention Deficit Disorder or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. The book can easily be read by a person with ADD. The print is large, the chapters are short and the steps to change are explained and illustrated. And every chapter ends with a summary. Dr. Puryear is a psychiatrist and he himself has ADD so he speaks from his own experience. Sections include: Problems and strategies, Simplify and organize, Time, Habits, Unpleasant states of mind, Personality issues and more. He also includes interviews with two ADD patients.
Puryear writes about his own issues with ADD and with the steps he uses to over come problems. For example, in the first chapter he tells about losing track of his car keys. He and his wife would search almost daily for his keys. His wife finally suggested he ALWAYS put them on the table by the front door. He explains the steps needed to make that a habit for him with ADD.
Throughout the book Puryear writes with humor and dismay about his own problems being organized even now. He describes his difficulties writing this book and getting it organized and proof reading it.
There are ten appendices with good information, especially one on how to study to really learn something. And another on how to not forget information you need to learn. Remember he went through med school!
This is a valuable book for people with ADD – and maybe it will help most of us!
Puryear writes about his own issues with ADD and with the steps he uses to over come problems. For example, in the first chapter he tells about losing track of his car keys. He and his wife would search almost daily for his keys. His wife finally suggested he ALWAYS put them on the table by the front door. He explains the steps needed to make that a habit for him with ADD.
Throughout the book Puryear writes with humor and dismay about his own problems being organized even now. He describes his difficulties writing this book and getting it organized and proof reading it.
There are ten appendices with good information, especially one on how to study to really learn something. And another on how to not forget information you need to learn. Remember he went through med school!
This is a valuable book for people with ADD – and maybe it will help most of us!
April 15, 2014
The author is a psychiatrist that was diagnosed with ADD in the later years of his life, and he talks about using strategies to combat typical behaviors that make life more difficult for those with ADD/ADHD, such as losing his keys. More than anything, the book seems to be another one of his own strategies for understand his own ADD/ADHD. The book doesn't answer everything, and notes that ADD/ADHD looks different and presents unique challenges for each person. There's also a lot of repetition. It could have been half as long and had just as much information, but it gives enough examples that it becomes comforting that someone can relate, and provides motivation to find out how to meet your personal challenges.
February 11, 2022
Puryear doesn't have ADHD handled for himself, so he definitely doesn't have it handled for you. His symptoms are not well managed. He has a handful of strategies that partially work, that he repeats incessantly. He demands a ton of mental labor from his wife, complains when he doesn't get it, and calls her "nagging" when he does. He spends the rest of the book wallowing in self pity. He tells the reader (repeatedly) that he expected the book to fail, and that shows in the writing. It's choppy, awkward, and desperately needed at least an editor if not a ghost writer.
December 9, 2014
This book is pretty great for ADHD adults. Some readers will be frustrated by the lack of organization and the way it meanders, but I think it's an accurate look at how the ADHD brain processes and integrates strategies. I liked that it was easy to pick up and read a few strategies at a time, and then test them out. This is not a book to read through in one sitting, more like a series of readings to nibble at, a bit at a time.
August 4, 2018
Tips and Techniques for Living with ADD
I really found this book helpful. The authors writing style is relaxed, and I felt like I was face-to- face with the author. He made me laugh.
There are so many ideas in this book on how you can improve your life which living with ADD. There are multiple appendices that provide more information. I found the section on studying very helpful.
I really found this book helpful. The authors writing style is relaxed, and I felt like I was face-to- face with the author. He made me laugh.
There are so many ideas in this book on how you can improve your life which living with ADD. There are multiple appendices that provide more information. I found the section on studying very helpful.
December 28, 2017
This book was really helpful!
The problems the author faces are really similar to mine and I believe we think alike. I loved the writing style.
It's my favorite book on the subject.
I would recommend it for other adults with the inattentive type, like me.
The problems the author faces are really similar to mine and I believe we think alike. I loved the writing style.
It's my favorite book on the subject.
I would recommend it for other adults with the inattentive type, like me.
March 23, 2012
I liked his personal strategies and stories about his patients in helping them finds ways to cope with ADD. This book could have been much more succint and structured with better editing.
September 21, 2015
This is an amateurish book, but I found it charming and helpful.
August 8, 2025
This book is about how to force yourself to fit into nt world, how to mask, more precisely how author is doing it, and thinks that's the only way to do it.
There’s not much acceptance for himself and working with his brain, accepting differences.
I mean, yeah, this stuff works, because it's gaslighting in various forms, or other forms of self abuse.
Main point is - why would you like to do that to yourself? Does that really makes you happy with your life at the end of the day / week?
Is all of that you forced yourself to do / perform really worth your energy? There are few streaks of hope, but I just don't want to spend more of my time absorbing his thoughts, since it's going against what I want for myself - acceptance of my brain differences, my energy levels, putting myself first in care sense, and not putting myself down (which he does all the time).
I'm also a bit worried for his patients, because he'd share this as legit advice. 'deny yourself' can't end up good.
I feel sorry and deep compassion for the author, because if he as a psychiatrist couldn't find through all these years gentler approach for himself than brute force, nor recognize his brain differences, I can't even imagine how much he lives his life in ultra hard mode.
So, my rating is not about his story, I'm both honored he let us in, and saddened that he carries so much hurt :(
His coping is basically obsessive anxiety approach. Which is very stressful way to live. From my point of view and what I want in my life.
Rating is as 'do not recommend' for people with adhd who are looking to make their lives a bit easier on themselves, with more kindness, acceptance and setting boundaries towards others who'd like too much too fast from us.
If you're interested in how we're all different, or what we consider as a success, this is good journal to dig into. At least first half, I didn't finish it. I realized that I'm not interested in such insight into a life I don't want for myself, to not risk that my brain which IS suseptible to nudges, don't get wrong ideas. I worked hard to recognize such self talk as bad for me, so I don't want to normalize it (again) by reading it on repeat.
So, proceed with caution.
There’s not much acceptance for himself and working with his brain, accepting differences.
I mean, yeah, this stuff works, because it's gaslighting in various forms, or other forms of self abuse.
Main point is - why would you like to do that to yourself? Does that really makes you happy with your life at the end of the day / week?
Is all of that you forced yourself to do / perform really worth your energy? There are few streaks of hope, but I just don't want to spend more of my time absorbing his thoughts, since it's going against what I want for myself - acceptance of my brain differences, my energy levels, putting myself first in care sense, and not putting myself down (which he does all the time).
I'm also a bit worried for his patients, because he'd share this as legit advice. 'deny yourself' can't end up good.
I feel sorry and deep compassion for the author, because if he as a psychiatrist couldn't find through all these years gentler approach for himself than brute force, nor recognize his brain differences, I can't even imagine how much he lives his life in ultra hard mode.
So, my rating is not about his story, I'm both honored he let us in, and saddened that he carries so much hurt :(
His coping is basically obsessive anxiety approach. Which is very stressful way to live. From my point of view and what I want in my life.
Rating is as 'do not recommend' for people with adhd who are looking to make their lives a bit easier on themselves, with more kindness, acceptance and setting boundaries towards others who'd like too much too fast from us.
If you're interested in how we're all different, or what we consider as a success, this is good journal to dig into. At least first half, I didn't finish it. I realized that I'm not interested in such insight into a life I don't want for myself, to not risk that my brain which IS suseptible to nudges, don't get wrong ideas. I worked hard to recognize such self talk as bad for me, so I don't want to normalize it (again) by reading it on repeat.
So, proceed with caution.
October 12, 2019
I work as a clinical counsellor and read many psychology books.
This author is a psychiatrist who has ADHD and in this book he shares his personal tips.
What I value most
is his caring, empathic, self-accepting tone. He is very humble and vulnerable with ample self-compassion. The way he describes all of his ADHD strategies gives me great respect for how hard anyone with ADHD often is working/trying/devoting themselves to things. His writing is also very humorous in parts.
I particularly valued his section on shame which was very well done and his tone is balanced.
This book doesn't purport to be a full coverage of what ADHD is or isn't or why, but more of a sharing of his own "how" to manage it. For more detail on what adult ADHD looks like, Hallowell's Driven to Distraction is a balanced easy to read description. I also agree with other reviewers that this book does not sufficiently cover strengths of ADHD or the value of medication; Hallowell's Drive to/from Distraction are much better and comprehensive for this. Barkley's books provide excellent information on the impact of adult adhd and the science behind what is occurring neurologically, especially with regards to emotion, but his tone is rather stark and a bit top down clinical. What is unique is that in describing his day to day efforts it provides those without ADHD with a window into better respecting and understanding the challenges of ADHD. Puryear's caring tone is also very welcome.
This author is a psychiatrist who has ADHD and in this book he shares his personal tips.
What I value most
is his caring, empathic, self-accepting tone. He is very humble and vulnerable with ample self-compassion. The way he describes all of his ADHD strategies gives me great respect for how hard anyone with ADHD often is working/trying/devoting themselves to things. His writing is also very humorous in parts.
I particularly valued his section on shame which was very well done and his tone is balanced.
This book doesn't purport to be a full coverage of what ADHD is or isn't or why, but more of a sharing of his own "how" to manage it. For more detail on what adult ADHD looks like, Hallowell's Driven to Distraction is a balanced easy to read description. I also agree with other reviewers that this book does not sufficiently cover strengths of ADHD or the value of medication; Hallowell's Drive to/from Distraction are much better and comprehensive for this. Barkley's books provide excellent information on the impact of adult adhd and the science behind what is occurring neurologically, especially with regards to emotion, but his tone is rather stark and a bit top down clinical. What is unique is that in describing his day to day efforts it provides those without ADHD with a window into better respecting and understanding the challenges of ADHD. Puryear's caring tone is also very welcome.
September 16, 2024
This book was great! Very helpful for me to see that many things I have lived with, or thought was “wrong with me” are just because my brain works differently. My only issue is that the perspective is mainly male, he interviews a few other people but 2/3 of them are also male and the one female story is very brief and not that relatable! It’s just important to note that ADHD shows up differently between men and women and so this book doesn’t touch on that much.
January 25, 2021
Should be required reading for people with ADHD
He gives a lot of really good strategies and tips for handling ADHD both with and without medication. This book should be read by every person who is trying to learn about how their brain works with ADHD and find actionable solutions.
He gives a lot of really good strategies and tips for handling ADHD both with and without medication. This book should be read by every person who is trying to learn about how their brain works with ADHD and find actionable solutions.
December 9, 2018
Extremely rambling but has plenty of ideas worth a try
January 7, 2023
I loved the practical approach and self-disclosure but he was repetitive which was somewhat bothersome.
February 27, 2017
The author has ADD, so he has been there. He shares some good ideas and strategies, but it's pretty repetitive. (He has ADD :-) )
Needs editing...
2.5 stars
Needs editing...
2.5 stars
March 26, 2016
Boek dat super praktisch en persoonlijk is geschreven. Het gaat niet over theorieën, maar puur over strategieën om in het dagelijks leven toe te passen. Bijna alsof je met iemand op de bank een beetje over ADD zit te keuvelen. Ergens tussen de vier en vijf sterren. Als er wat meer structuur, en minder chaos in het boek had gezeten, waren het er vijf geworden. Het is nu lastig om dingen terug te zoeken en soms voelt het wat herhalend. Een aanrader voor mensen die zelf of in hun omgeving te maken hebben met AD(H)D: 'Your life can be better!'
August 24, 2012
Written specifically for people with attention deficit issues, this book offers strategies that can improve daily functioning for just about anyone. As a chronic procrastinator who also has a tough time making decisions, I found the information in these pages very encouraging and I look forward to implementing some of the simple strategies.
February 11, 2013
A good, practical book for ADHD people or those who live around them. I've found it sometimes pretty repetitive, but that's okay if you'd like to return to the book and just read a selected chapter.
I would definitely recommend it to anyone interested in the topic, it's really different than the books stating the already well known facts. I've bought the digital version for ~£2, such a steal.
I would definitely recommend it to anyone interested in the topic, it's really different than the books stating the already well known facts. I've bought the digital version for ~£2, such a steal.
September 15, 2013
Suggestions (not criticism) for adapting your life to meet the challenges presented by ADHD. Well written, the author clearly knows what he's talking about from experience, he understands that the problems are personal, but not due to personal failings and presents suggestions based on that understanding.
August 17, 2025
Just finished this book and found it very relevant. It is filled with great information presented in a casual and engaging manner. To some the book might seem disjointed but as the author states numerous times he has ADD. I would strongly recommend to anyone with ADD.
December 10, 2014
The strategies in this book are very useful, and the short chapters and frequent summaries are very helpful for people with ADD. However, the book is pretty negative in tone, and quite disorganized. Professional editing would have helped greatly.
Currently reading
September 5, 2014looks like it might be very usuefull
September 1, 2013
Too long and sometimes too complicated to stay focused and oriented. On the other hand suggestions, that make sense, on how to improve and helpful summaries at the end of each chapter.
June 22, 2014
Pretty useful book
November 17, 2015
Your life will be better
This book is a necessity for adults with ADD or ADHD. Very helpful for every day living. I intend on reading it again!
This book is a necessity for adults with ADD or ADHD. Very helpful for every day living. I intend on reading it again!
Displaying 1 - 30 of 33 reviews