5 For all the women before us ⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️
I will never forget this book. This book touched me deeply, I thought about the stories of all the women in my family before me. It’s not an easy read, but I recommend you let it marinate with you during the harder pages.
Hazel and her neighbor finds Mattie’s journal in the attic. Her neighbor offers to transcribe it for her, as Hazel is moving into a retirement home. The year is 1960, Hazel is Mattie’s granddaughter. The journal is read in first person as diary entries. There are small spoilers below.
We begin in 1865 Iowa
Mattie has marriage prospects, she works as a teacher and has a pleasant life in Iowa. Luke is the handsome guy in town, who out of know where proposes marriage to Mattie, because he feels she is well suited for the life they will build as homesteaders in the territory of Colorado. She accepts without much consideration and they are soon wed. It’s a marriage of convenience and they don’t know each other. He is polite but not particular kind to Mattie. He is a selfish and greedy lover but amenable to her.
Luke had a sweetheart before Mattie, Persia. He chose to marry Mattie, but will carry feelings for Persia into the marriage.
During the journey to Colorado Mattie is concerned about pleasing him, being a good wife and they meet obstacles that she handles like a pro, and you feel Luke is content in his choice of wife.
It’s like we dont even know Mattie in the beginning, it’s all about her getting a little recognition that he rarely ordains on her. When he knows it’s her birthday and he gives her a pin, she is pretty much falling for him. Girl has low standards, what can I say.
Life in Colorado is tough and harsh, and not what Mattie had imagined. When she is pregnant Luke decides to go home to buy grains, ( but mostly to see Persia) He leaves his pregnant wife in alone in Colorado while he cohorts with Persia.
Mattie finds a picture of Persia in the barn while he is away, hidden in the wall. This does start a feeling of uneasiness in her, but she pushes it aside. She gives birth to their son while he is away with the help of her friends in the homestead. Her diary changes over time, from happy, innocent to more weary over time. She keeps her diary a secret from Luke, which is another example of how she contorts herself into fitting in to his life. She thinks he won’t approve.
Luke makes a few trips like this back to Persia in Iowa 🤮
One day he is all dressed up and tells Mattie he has a surprise for her! She thinks it’s her best friend Carey who will visit, but no, it’s Persia and her husband, she recently married. Luke makes Mattie share her bed with Persia who is mean and petty to Mattie. Tells her Luke asked her to marry him first, and she declined, the pin she got for her birthday was Persia’s engagement gift and the well in the homestead was dug to persuade Persia to come. Mattie is heartsick but is pretty much out of options, she is pregnant again.
She looses the child she is carrying and both her and Luke grieves. Luke is a very caring father to John their first born son. He takes Mattie to Denver for a “conference” she is left to her own devices and happens to run into Luke and Persia at a restaurant. At this point I hate him so much and my heart was breaking for Mattie, she had very little agency over her own life, and the relationship between her and Luke was a real friendship of sorts. I guess a friend would have been more caring, but he is so used to his own agency and her not have any at all.
Like I assume most marriages in those days were. Married life is not sugarcoated.
Mattie is soon pregnant again and their daughter doesn’t survive the first hour of her life, grief is surrounding Mattie and Luke. John is the apple of both their eyes.
One day Luke packs up John to run away with Persia. To leave Maddie all alone in a homestead she doesn’t want to be in, in harsh circumstances. He is taking her child from her….. Persia, however will not take the child and Luke returns home with John with his hat in his hand.
Tragedy happens, and Luke and Mattie will have to make decisions, the power in the relationship will have to change and it does. But at great cost. I won’t reveal more, and it’s worth moving forward.
Mattie is an unreliable narrator as she is the sole contributor to the diary but she is also very level headed and as a reader you learn to trust her observations. She is lovely, thoughtful, hopeful, hardworking and not entirely without prejudice against others which is a brave decision by author, but it’s also valuable to the reader because it helps set the stage of 1865 and the racism and prejudice that was normalized at that time.
After the tragedy Mattie stops journaling and it completely broke me, either she closed the lid of the happy girl she once was and is now just enduring.
Or on the more positive side chose to close a painful chapter of her life. She ran out of emotional space. The diary spans 3 years and it’s so fascinating to read how her entries go from youthful to more and more detached, the rhythm changes completely. “The wind is gone.” “The baby is dead” you feel her disassociating from her life there. The author literally has you in a chokehold. You feel Mattie in your bones through this story of survival.
The story ends with Hazel, the granddaughter reading a letter to Mattie from Luke when they are old. It was needed❤️
A lot of women’s lives ended “unrecorded” as pioneers and this book paid tribute to them.
I have one question that was not answered, and if you read this, as you totally should please share your thoughts. After the tragedy Mattie makes a decision, a potentially life changing one. But a letter from a friend goes missing? Had she had it, the book would have changed. Did Luke intercept? That’s what I think. There is no confirmation of this, but his attitude completely does a 180 around that time. What do you think?
Honestly this was one of my best reads this year. I didn’t expect to be swept away like this. I did fall in love with Mattie, I thought about my great grandmothers life. The history of women and how important it is, that we keep women’s rights in mind when we vote.
Should you read it. Absolutely my strongest recommendation to date. I will never forget this book.