A servant, a thief, and a whore walk into a bar......and that's essentially how this rollicking good comedy from Elizabethan England gets started. The servant's master has gone out of town for a few months to escape the plague, and so the servant goes to a local establishment, finds a local troublemaker and prostitute, and convinces them to set up camp with him in his master's house, pretend to be an alchemist and his assistants, and rip people off. It's a brilliant plan, and relies, of course, on the gullibility and greed of the "customers" who are ready to pay anything for the power to control life and death itself. The play begins with the two men arguing over who is more crucial to the success of the scam and should therefore take more of the spoils. Before long, there's a knock at the door. Another customer! It's the knight, who has been promised the ability to turn all metals into gold! How will they get his money without delivering the goods? Quick, you go put on your costume! You, go get the door! And the play goes on from there.
What a relief to read an Elizabethan comedy that isn't about romance or courtship for once. All props to Shakespeare, naturally, but The Alchemist feels very different from Shakespearean comedy, and I found it refreshing for that reason. This play is not about love or feelings at all. It is the opposite of sentimental. It's about a wonderful scam, and the idiocy of the scammed, and the cleverness of the scammers. The play follows the various lies and schemes cooked up by the three crooks, taking time to reveal the strains building in their own relationship as well as the twisted motivations and desires of the customers who stop by. The trio promises one thing to one person, then another thing to another person, and as happens in any good comedy, the lies begin to collide, contradict each other, and reveal holes in their false identities, and the whole thing threatens at every moment to blow up in their faces. Some of the customers begin to get suspicious. Some begin to suspect the existence of the others. If they meet and trade information, all is lost. Two of the trio conspire together to betray the third, while a different pair in the trio conspire together to betray a different third. You can be sure that, by the last act, all the customers have started banging at the door one after the other demanding explanations, and the way the servant, who has played both his customers and his partners like a fiddle, spontaneously juggles and steers his way through these lies with everybody present in the same room is really quite astonishing. And does the master suddenly come home in the middle of all of this, ahead of schedule, right into the middle of a heated argument between his servant and a bunch of strangers demanding their money back? I'll leave that for you to discover.
This play is great fun. Like any piece from the period, it requires time and effort to get through, but get yourself a well-annotated copy (Penguin or Oxford will do), and you'll find an old play worthy of the best con-artist farces and satires of the present day. Everyone gets made fun of - knights, priests, alchemists, lords, thieves, idiots, the whole shebang. The pace is quick, the dialogue is witty, the characters are sufficiently well-drawn and ridiculous, and it's one of the best plays of Elizabethan England not written by Shakespeare.