Spare the Child: The Religious Roots of Punishment and the Psychological Impact of Physical Abuse

by Philip Greven

He that spareth his rod hateth his son: but he that loveth him chasteneth him betimes. These words provided generations of American Christians with the justification for physically disciplining their children, in ways that range from spankings to brutal beatings. This learned and deeply disturbing work of history examines both the religious roots of corporal punishment in America and its consequences -- in the minds of children, in adults, and in our national tendencies toward authoritarian and apocalyptic thinking. Drawing on sources as old as Cotton Mather and as current as today's headlines, Spare the Child is one of those rare works of scholarship that have the power to change our lives.

Genres: Psychology, Parenting, Childrens, Nonfiction, Religion, Christianity, Sociology

284 pages, Paperback

First published February 6, 1991

Reviews

[Peter Mendrela · Rating 5 out of 5]

After having read many of Alice Miller's books I was a bit skeptical about someone else being able to depict and empathize with the plight of an abused child - but, in a big way, Philip Greven has proven me wrong. This is an incredibly well-researched and argued work that strikes a perfect balance between scholarship (psychology, history, and religion) and the visceral pain that haunts the life of an adult whose childhood has been murdered by those who claimed to have loved him/her the most. Having come from an abusive family myself, I found so much my life laid bare on almost every page of Greven's book. Admittedly, this was not an easy exercise (I found myself in a heart-wrenching pause after many a paragraph), but it is precisely in acknowledging the brutality of our childhoods and identifying the culprits that healing may finally begin.

Thank you so much Professor Greven for your wonderful contribution. It is thanks to brilliant and courageous scholars like yourself that the infernal cycle of mutual sundering of our bodies and souls in the name of God and superannuated moral ethos may finally reach its long overdue end. I, for one, can hardly wait.

[Adam Ross · Rating 4 out of 5]

An extraordinary book in breadth and in scope. Greven's book, though 25 years old, is still startlingly relevant. He takes aim at the historical roots of physical abuse of children in American history, tracing it back to the Puritan theology of our ancestors. Some of this information was new to me and I grew up in a household that celebrated the Puritans. The first two sections of the book are on the history and the theology of religious physical abuse (and here he shows how Puritan theology in particular was abusive, damaging, and repressive to children), and the third section addresses the behavioral and psychological consequences of physical punishment of children. One of the most fascinating aspects of the book is how he traces physical abuse back to the key theologians in Protestant history, Luther, Calvin, Cotton Mather, and many others were all broken and repressed by their parents, which led to a construction of an emotionally repressive theology that further abused generations after them. Vital reading.

[Josh Thompson · Rating 5 out of 5]

I long ago gave up a belief in political authority (and, shortly after that, a believe overall in the concept of "authority", religeous, political, or otherwise.)

So this book is all the more horrifying. Basically, it brings me back to my own childhood, and of course the childhoods of many millions of children being assaulted by adults, physically, emotionally, verbally, on behalf of the group delusion of "sky daddy" ("God the Father" or the patriarch/sky daddy of the abrahamic religions)

I cannot anymore understand the love for sky daddy that's so ubiquitous in the USA. It makes sense for why americans, european americans, those who participate in the intellectual/cultural traditions of supremacy that came from those european origins unleash such devestating behavior on others. They make up whatever they want based on the bible, then apply it with force because they see themselves as a Little God, with Little God Powers. (child abuse, genocide, slavery, where does godly powers end????)

After reading this book, I am all the more sensitive to those who beat their kids, or say "as long as my child behaves in a certain way, I *probably* won't have to beat them"

these people do not love their kids. If you were raised by a person like this, they did not love you, and used sexual assault of children for behavior control, and it's a full-on devastating experience. My parents still live, and if they died tomorrow I wouldn't go to their funeral. I'd say "good riddance". They emotionally murdered our relationship years ago, AND IN RECENT TIMES when, as an adult, with a kid at the age at which they began physically assaulting me, I could go talk to them about it.

Until that point, they were always saying 'wait until you have kids'. I didn't need to have my own kid to realize that adults hitting children is wrong, but it gave me the emotional shot in the arm to talk about it directly with them. They did NOT like me coming after them in this way, and ran away screaming, functionally. My dad's final words to me were "I raised you how I raised you, you're welcome."

Lol. choke on a *****, donald. He's been a colonialist through and through from the get-go, has never concerned himself with the experience of his victims. ppl of the global majority in afghanistan, iraq, the american south, the global south, he, and any 'good american christian' would be willing to accept the death of any number of people to assuage his/their own sense of how things "should" be.

Those might be the last words we exchange in the time we both spend on this planet.

[Katelyn Tanis · Rating 4 out of 5]

This book is a tough read. Big internet hugs to anyone here for personal reasons. It took me a year to finish this, but it was healing to have my childhood feelings acknowledge. The first half (historical/religious roots, etc.) was the most helpful for me. In the second half, I just read the sections/consequences that were most relevant to me.

[Elizabeth AcesoUnderGlass · Rating 1 out of 5]

Using the wrong tools to answer the question.

[Mackenzie Mccoy · Rating 5 out of 5]

Good insight into society.

[Joy Chase · Rating 4 out of 5]

The title of this book: Spare the Child; the religious roots of punishment and the psychological impact of physical abuse. Philip Greven covers all of this but the book stops short of giving any kind of solution to the psychological repercussions of childhood abuse. This is a serious lack, in my opinion. This book, written in 1990, gives the historical roots of physical punishment referencing America mostly. It shows unequivocally that "spare the rod" is not a New Testament teaching and in fact, not the words of Christ. The book is well written and follows logically through its five parts from explaining the problem and experiences to rationals, both religious and secular, and then the psychological consequences. Chapter five gives the options available to raising children without physical violence and abuse.

[Jennifer · Rating 4 out of 5]

An amazing book that gives some of the religious reasoning behind corporal punishment and the fallacies in that reasoning. It gives solid evidence to the harm of physical punishment through personal accounts and research studies. The consequences of physical punishment and the author is exceptional at striking the truth of these consequences.


Excellent read for any parent who has physically punished their child or was physically punished as a child, but especially for a Christian parent.

[Kristin · Rating 4 out of 5]

Heartbreaking analysis of traditional child rearing methods

A difficult book to read, but a feeling of relief that finally studies are being done to find out if spanking really helps or harms. The conclusion is that it causes much more harm than good to both the child and the adult...again, with much history and research taken into account. I find myself in agreement with much (but not all) of this book's research and perspective. It would be worth anyone's time to read my highlights from this book if they don't have the time to read the book itself.

[Laura · Rating 3 out of 5]

The description of this book here on Goodreads is actually a fine review. The book takes a frightening look at corporal punishment, focusing mostly on the Christian right's use of such delightful concepts as "breaking a child's will," which is accomplished just as GOD apparently ordered -- by beating the kid with sticks. This treatment starts as young as 18 months, apparently. Thoughtful and thorough, if scary.

[Jeffrey · Rating 1 out of 5]

Granted, a book on this topic will get dated quickly, but the repeated statement of possible links between abuse and later psychological issues as if these were proven causative factors in the end made this book unreadable for me. Still gave it two stars because of the laudable goal of convincing everyone that no level of physical maltreatment of children is acceptable.

[Rosemary Brown · Rating 5 out of 5]

Another book that influenced Dr. Brown's thinking. She cites Greven in "Addiction Is the Symptom."