Better Off Dead

by Matthew Rowe

A world where sorcerers are saucy, vampires are a pain in the neck and everyone is clawing to be on top.

The city of Londinium is in a period of civil unrest, but it’s not because the tube is always late, or because people are tired of zombies shedding limbs in public, nor is it because the humans are tired of trying to eke out a living only to meet a messy end in a dark alley. An unknown vampire has proclaimed himself ruler, and if there is one thing the people, both living and dead, hate more than a tyrannical ruler, it’s a secretive one.

One young vampire is charged with discovering the prince’s identity. The only problem: he doesn’t want to. Ramses, the world’s first genuine cat burglar, is far more concerned with eliminating the threat posed by the feline race rather than that of some pesky vampire lord, a dragon and civil war.

Can this undead slacker learn to grow up at last, foil this mysterious plot and halt the biggest supernatural conflict in history or will he need help from his mummy?

Genres: Fiction, Fantasy

516 pages, Paperback

Published October 31, 2011

Reviews

[M.G. Mason · Rating 3 out of 5]

Imagine a far-flung future London (Londinium) where humans are as rare as Inuits are today in the same city. Imagine one where Supernaturals are the norm - vampires (which thankfully do not sparkle), werewolves, zombies etc. Imagine a quasi medieval city with fire-breathing dragons and you have a good idea of the background to the story. It has an element of Pratchett about it (and even a few very well appreciated Pratchett in-jokes) and the speed of humour on a par with Robert Rankin - high praise indeed from me.

Against the backdrop of this cosmopolitan city of Londinium is one ancient vampire proclaiming himself ruler. This rather irritates a lot of people and it is down to one reluctant young vampire named Ramses to solve the mystery. This is way above his remit, his main mission in life is to prevent feline tyrants from taking over the world. Nobody told that that would give him the experience to fight other vampires! On his journey he will meet dragons and a whole plethora of bizarre characters who live in the city including P-Head, Gimpy and Khalid.

I really wanted to love this book and it has some truly great things about it. The humour comes thick and fast and it was a case of blink in the wrong place and you miss a joke. It was an interesting plot with a great background. Sadly, and this is the only real problem with it, is that I feel it lacks a true coherent structure. Though the plot is clearly defined, the plot seems to just take us from one high jinks scenario to the next. Whether you like this style of writing is a matter of personal taste for some, sadly it did not work for me.

That being said, it did flow quite well - though in places a bit of tighter editing would not have gone amiss. I felt my attention drifting at times. Couple the lack of clear structure with this and it is in danger at times of slipping into messy territory - for a large portion of the first half I did feel that it lost its way. Thankfully this was saved in the last hundred pages or so, everything seems to be tied up rather nicely.

Despite being marketed as a YA novel, I felt that some of the humour crossed the line into adult humour at times - inappropriate for the intended age group of 12-18. I had to keep stopping to ask myself "can we really do this in a YA book"?

3.5/5 for me.

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[Melanie Adkins · Rating 5 out of 5]

Mummy's, vampires, werewolves and dragons are all part of the war between Khalid and Lucian. Two powerful men both of whom want control of Londinium. This war takes place far into the future when supernaturals are common place and humans are the minority. Khalid enlists the help of a rag tag bunch of misfits to further his hold on Londinium. Ramses, P-Head, Gimpy and Kenempti work together, not always well, to push back Lucian and his warriors. Finding themselves in several bad situations, they must learn to work together before they can be of any help in the war. They each have their own agenda in helping Khalid but somehow together this group does the impossible.

Quirky, humorous and wonderful, this book will keep you entertained for quite some time. Each character is well developed and certainly worthy of a book of their own. I loved the humor mixed with the outright silliness in this one. I recommend it to everyone, not just those who enjoy supernaturals. Everyone will take away an enjoyable experience. The story is well thought out and written in a way that makes it easy to follow. Get this book.

I didn't find any issues with this one.

I gave this one 5 out of 5 books because you rarely see humor mixed with supernaturals.